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(Mediaite)   Michael Cohen's book leaks like a hooker in Vegas with a weak bladder   (mediaite.com) divider line
    More: Awkward, Vladimir Putin, President Donald Trump, Trump's current legal team, Michael Cohen, Russian President Vladimir Putin, President Donald J. Trump, Trump's groundbreaking presidential campaign, billionaire celebrity savior of the country  
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3212 clicks; posted to Politics » on 14 Aug 2020 at 7:18 AM (5 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2020-08-13 10:14:08 PM  
Those bladders were paid good Trump money to weaken all over the place, until somebody could find an Obama mattress. What did his mom do to that boy?
 
2020-08-13 10:24:42 PM  
It's not a leak when it's published on its official web site.
 
2020-08-13 10:47:25 PM  
I'm guessing that Trump is far more of a filthy bastard than the germaphobe he claims to be.
 
2020-08-13 11:34:27 PM  

pueblonative: I'm guessing that Trump is far more of a filthy bastard than the germaphobe he claims to be.


he likes to watch. not touch.
 
2020-08-14 12:03:28 AM  

optikeye: pueblonative: I'm guessing that Trump is far more of a filthy bastard than the germaphobe he claims to be.

he likes to watch. not touch.


He raw dogged a porn star.  That germaphobe BS is BS.
 
2020-08-14 12:15:21 AM  
He must be jonesing for a golden shower with how much he's been talking about water pressure lately.

Also...
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-14 1:47:09 AM  

BizarreMan: It's not a leak when it's published on its official web site.


Woosh!
And ngl, i bought a copy...

Signed
 
2020-08-14 3:13:23 AM  
Thing is this pee shower stuff is now just something that could be said by anyone who wants trump's non-fans to buy into eagerly.

I think it did happen but I'll wait until video (yes, sorry but it's something I'd have to see, so I can know for sure).
 
2020-08-14 3:39:13 AM  

Slaxl: Thing is this pee shower stuff is now just something that could be said by anyone who wants trump's non-fans to buy into eagerly.

I think it did happen but I'll wait until video (yes, sorry but it's something I'd have to see, so I can know for sure).


I would pay good money to *never* see that video. (Though I will read the Fark comments of those who do.)
 
2020-08-14 3:57:03 AM  
Of course it's as salacious as possible.  I know that no one is going to listen but I have an idea:  let's stop giving these assholes money.  Everything even mildly interesting is going to be all over the internet for free.

He may have turned on Trump now, but that doesn't make him our pal.  And before he turned, he helped Trump every step of the way
 
2020-08-14 6:14:06 AM  
If Trump wasn't competent enough to bump off a weasel like Cohen, that pretty much exonerates him for having anything to do with Jeffrey Epstein.

Also, everyone knew Trump liked golden showers. He's lying about it because it humiliated him.
 
2020-08-14 6:22:46 AM  
i.kinja-img.comView Full Size
 
2020-08-14 7:11:16 AM  
I'll read a few experts before purchasing. I somehow think it might read like Cohen talks:

So then I walked over to him and told him I got his back. The AG intern said she needs to be whacked.That party was a who's who of NY State corruption, and after the hangers-on went home, out came what I call the tinkle girls. The big man loved 'em.
 
2020-08-14 7:15:38 AM  

Calypsocookie: He must be jonesing for a golden shower with how much he's been talking about water pressure lately.


Huh... I just assumed Carlson or Hannity had been ranting about shower heads. But your idea actually makes a lot more sense.
 
2020-08-14 7:25:00 AM  
'And prostitutes come up to me with pee in their bladders, young prostitutes, very very young prostitutes who haven't peed since lunch, maybe even breakfast and they say 'sir, pee is raining down from heaven on you today'.
 
2020-08-14 7:26:08 AM  
I've always made it a point to read any book that someone else doesn't want you to read. If Trump cared enough to try and stop this book being published it isn't because he thinks the entire thing is made up.
 
2020-08-14 7:27:22 AM  
plus insinuations that Trump wanted Cohen dead for possessing all this scandalous knowledge.

When you make a secret deal with a dictator part of the reward will always be death.  Just ask Epstein.
 
2020-08-14 7:28:39 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-14 7:29:42 AM  

thermo: optikeye: pueblonative: I'm guessing that Trump is far more of a filthy bastard than the germaphobe he claims to be.

he likes to watch. not touch.

He raw dogged a porn star.  That germaphobe BS is BS.


well, considering top tier porn stars are tested regularly, I'd feel pretty safe about rawdoggin her.  Only with her consent though.  Trump just makes up bs to get out of one lie by telling another so he's trapped in an endless web of lies he needs to cover for
 
2020-08-14 7:31:07 AM  
Seriously, Subby? Such an image. "Sieve" was unavailable?
 
2020-08-14 7:31:38 AM  
Cohen has done us all a service and we should lock him up as a reward.
 
2020-08-14 7:33:10 AM  

RasIanI: Seriously, Subby? Such an image. "Sieve" was unavailable?


I stand corrected. Headline is apropos.

/always read TFA first
 
2020-08-14 7:37:55 AM  

RTOGUY: I've always made it a point to read any book that someone else doesn't want you to read. If Trump cared enough to try and stop this book being published it isn't because he thinks the entire thing is made up.


If it was up to Trump you wouldn't be able to read anything that didn't profusely praise him.
 
2020-08-14 7:38:14 AM  
Holy farking shiat, well piss.  Wow Russia somehow really managed to destroy the US, and I have no problem with excrement being sexual, but destroying the "president" right in the middle of an election campaign is, well gold.
 
2020-08-14 7:38:31 AM  

Magruda: Cohen has done us all a service and we should lock him up as a reward.


We tried, but poor little Mikey was too scared of COVID-19. He was released because it was too dangerous for him to be somewhere like that and possibly get sick. It would be too inhumane for someone to be in a confined and crowded space in the middle of a pandemic like that.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to get my kids ready for school...
 
2020-08-14 7:39:02 AM  

pueblonative: I'm guessing that Trump is far more of a filthy bastard than the germaphobe he claims to be.


Obsessive hand-washing is not necessarily evidence of a germaphobe, per se, and is indicative of other disorders, lol
 
2020-08-14 7:40:25 AM  

clkeagle: Magruda: Cohen has done us all a service and we should lock him up as a reward.

We tried, but poor little Mikey was too scared of COVID-19. He was released because it was too dangerous for him to be somewhere like that and possibly get sick. It would be too inhumane for someone to be in a confined and crowded space in the middle of a pandemic like that.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to get my kids ready for school...


Sacrifices must be made. My wife will be there teaching.
 
2020-08-14 7:40:59 AM  
He would burn America to the ground if he could be lord of the ashes.  (and he is)
 
2020-08-14 7:44:51 AM  

FatherChaos: If Trump wasn't competent enough to bump off a weasel like Cohen, that pretty much exonerates him for having anything to do with Jeffrey Epstein.

Also, everyone knew Trump liked golden showers. He's lying about it because it humiliated him.


With Bill Barr in the line up, nobody seriously worried that Trump was behind Epstein.

/ In other news people were worried that HotPie would decimate all of Westeros, but they tabled that worry to deal w/ the Night King first.
// I'm not touching the golden showers thing, as another farker noted, I'll wait for other farkers to trip that landmine.
 
2020-08-14 7:47:20 AM  

olderbudnoweiser: [Fark user image image 201x201]


I regret having only one funny to give to this post
 
2020-08-14 7:48:38 AM  
What Trump does or doesn't do next tells you all you need to know about the book's veracity.  His lawyer has written a book, after pleading guilty to crimes involving Trump as a co-conspirator, that implicates Trump in further illegal acts and basic transgressions.  Think about that.  Your ex-lawyer comes out to the public, destroying the lawyer-client privilege, spewing defamations against your character, are you just going to take it?  Of course not.  You sue him for attorney malpractice (which you would have done at the beginning if he signed NDAs without your knowledge).  You sue him for libel. You don't allow him to drag your name in the mud, and rake in millions of dollar. For someone like Trump, who sues people at the drop of a hat, it's a perfect time to sue. IF it's full of falsehoods.

The one reason you'd let Cohen carry on as he is is because you know, YOU KNOW, the discovery process would destroy you if you sue.  You know Cohen would be pulling out the evidence from the file that would prove nearly everything he wrote was true, or, true enough. All the shady NDAs.  All the billing information. All the expense reports.  All the evidence to show the world your true self.  If there is one person in the world who Trump didn't lie to, it's Cohen.

Being a corrupt lawyer is easy, if your client is as corrupt as you.
 
2020-08-14 7:50:37 AM  

thermo: optikeye: pueblonative: I'm guessing that Trump is far more of a filthy bastard than the germaphobe he claims to be.

he likes to watch. not touch.

He raw dogged a porn star.  That germaphobe BS is BS.


It might be. I seem to recall that he offered his "germaphobia" as proof that he could not have committed a certain sexual assault of which he'd been accused.

But phobias, by their very nature, are not logical, though, so he might just be accidentally telling the truth on this one point.

The point being the germaphobia, not the sexual assault. If he were accused of having raped to death a hamster which vaguely resembled Ivanka, I'd be inclined to believe it.
 
2020-08-14 7:50:44 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-14 7:52:15 AM  

RyogaM: What Trump does or doesn't do next tells you all you need to know about the book's veracity.  His lawyer has written a book, after pleading guilty to crimes involving Trump as a co-conspirator, that implicates Trump in further illegal acts and basic transgressions.  Think about that.  Your ex-lawyer comes out to the public, destroying the lawyer-client privilege, spewing defamations against your character, are you just going to take it?  Of course not.  You sue him for attorney malpractice (which you would have done at the beginning if he signed NDAs without your knowledge).  You sue him for libel. You don't allow him to drag your name in the mud, and rake in millions of dollar. For someone like Trump, who sues people at the drop of a hat, it's a perfect time to sue. IF it's full of falsehoods.

The one reason you'd let Cohen carry on as he is is because you know, YOU KNOW, the discovery process would destroy you if you sue.  You know Cohen would be pulling out the evidence from the file that would prove nearly everything he wrote was true, or, true enough. All the shady NDAs.  All the billing information. All the expense reports.  All the evidence to show the world your true self.  If there is one person in the world who Trump didn't lie to, it's Cohen.

Being a corrupt lawyer is easy, if your client is as corrupt as you.


Is Cohen dead yet, or has tRump used up his 3 "legal" deaths as president already?
 
2020-08-14 7:55:26 AM  

Langdon_777: Holy farking shiat, well piss.  Wow Russia somehow really managed to destroy the US, and I have no problem with excrement being sexual, but destroying the "president" right in the middle of an election campaign is, well gold.


You mean "golden".
Russia is just showering golden on President Trump right now.
 
2020-08-14 7:55:35 AM  
That is rude and misogynist against sex workers OP

sex work is real work, i would like to see you try to be good at it, it's hard
 
2020-08-14 8:04:36 AM  
I don't care if it's all true or not. The fact that it will drive Trump absolutely insane to have all this salacious material out in the public is enough for me. And if some of it ends up being true and ruins him financially or, more importantly to him, socially, more the better.

fark all these people. But fark Trump the worst.
 
2020-08-14 8:04:38 AM  

thermo: optikeye: pueblonative: I'm guessing that Trump is far more of a filthy bastard than the germaphobe he claims to be.

he likes to watch. not touch.

He raw dogged a porn star.  That germaphobe BS is BS.


It's probably not about the germs per se.  If it's real, it's probably more akin to some sort of OCD, where the 'germs' only exist if you're not in control of the actions.  Basically, if he chooses to touch someone else, that's a-okay.  If someone else chooses to touch him, they feel 'dirty' and it sets off whatever mental issue he has
 
2020-08-14 8:06:43 AM  
i.ytimg.comView Full Size
 
2020-08-14 8:12:25 AM  

thermo: optikeye: pueblonative: I'm guessing that Trump is far more of a filthy bastard than the germaphobe he claims to be.

he likes to watch. not touch.

He raw dogged a porn star.  That germaphobe BS is BS.


He hasn't worn a mask during a pandemic. He's not a germaphobe
 
2020-08-14 8:12:29 AM  

Lambskincoat: Those bladders were paid good Trump money to weaken all over the place, until somebody could find an Obama mattress. What did his mom do to that boy?


It wasn't his mom. It was the gay sex with Roy Cohn.
 
2020-08-14 8:13:34 AM  

Naido: Of course it's as salacious as possible.  I know that no one is going to listen but I have an idea:  let's stop giving these assholes money.  Everything even mildly interesting is going to be all over the internet for free.

He may have turned on Trump now, but that doesn't make him our pal.  And before he turned, he helped Trump every step of the way


Says who?
 
2020-08-14 8:18:10 AM  

Langdon_777: I have no problem with excrement being sexual


Favorited to provide me a sensible chuckle, for years and years.
 
2020-08-14 8:19:56 AM  
Anyone here watch the Blacklist?

To me, Cohen is like a slightly inept Mr. Kaplan.  I have the feeling once the book comes out, some new revelations will be made, and after further questioning Cohen will be able to, quite literally, produce the bodies.
 
2020-08-14 8:20:57 AM  

saywhonow: I don't care if it's all true or not. The fact that it will drive Trump absolutely insane to have all this salacious material out in the public is enough for me. And if some of it ends up being true and ruins him financially or, more importantly to him, socially, more the better.

fark all these people. But fark Trump the worst.


I do not think tRump has ever had a "socially" since Epstein got arrested.

No one in his "circle" has ever liked him.

He got elected due to historic flaws in the US constitution - a thing that needs to be re-written, why over 300 million people trust a document written by slave owners is beyond me.

It needs to be re-written by people that know things, rather than own them.  Alas I am not sure that is even possible considering how so many Americans seem to discount and despise education and knowledge.
 
2020-08-14 8:22:43 AM  
Does this throw any light on why Pruitt had to get and remove a used mattress from a Trump hotel? Another instance of destruction of evidence, in plain sight? I don't recall any slightly plausible explanation for that bizarre incident.
Hey, we're just asking questions here.
 
2020-08-14 8:22:48 AM  

RyogaM: What Trump does or doesn't do next tells you all you need to know about the book's veracity.  His lawyer has written a book, after pleading guilty to crimes involving Trump as a co-conspirator, that implicates Trump in further illegal acts and basic transgressions.  Think about that.  Your ex-lawyer comes out to the public, destroying the lawyer-client privilege, spewing defamations against your character, are you just going to take it?  Of course not.  You sue him for attorney malpractice (which you would have done at the beginning if he signed NDAs without your knowledge).  You sue him for libel. You don't allow him to drag your name in the mud, and rake in millions of dollar. For someone like Trump, who sues people at the drop of a hat, it's a perfect time to sue. IF it's full of falsehoods.

The one reason you'd let Cohen carry on as he is is because you know, YOU KNOW, the discovery process would destroy you if you sue.  You know Cohen would be pulling out the evidence from the file that would prove nearly everything he wrote was true, or, true enough. All the shady NDAs.  All the billing information. All the expense reports.  All the evidence to show the world your true self.  If there is one person in the world who Trump didn't lie to, it's Cohen.

Being a corrupt lawyer is easy, if your client is as corrupt as you.


I can see him threatening a lawsuit.  He can't stop himself.  The true tell will be if he actually files it.   One thing I am certain is that the publishers fact check team have been over everything with a fine tooth comb to ensure that anything libelous has been confirmed.
 
2020-08-14 8:23:14 AM  

FnkyTwn: Langdon_777: I have no problem with excrement being sexual

Favorited to provide me a sensible chuckle, for years and years.


Hehe at least it is a sensible chuckle rather than an sensual one.
 
2020-08-14 8:24:35 AM  

Naido: Of course it's as salacious as possible.  I know that no one is going to listen but I have an idea:  let's stop giving these assholes money.  Everything even mildly interesting is going to be all over the internet for free.

He may have turned on Trump now, but that doesn't make him our pal.  And before he turned, he helped Trump every step of the way


And he had ample opportunity to spill this shiat while under oath in front of Congress.

"I believe the Steele dossier is 100% accurate. Why? I personally witnessed the behavior described therein. *gives details*"
 
2020-08-14 8:26:35 AM  
Maybe that is why Barr is rumored to be pulling some stunt today.
 
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