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(Bored Panda)   Wrong number texts are the best kind of texts   (boredpanda.com) divider line
    More: Amusing, TEXT, Grammatical person, Text messaging, Mobile phone, Human, Grammatical number, Real number, Thought  
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884 clicks; posted to Discussion » on 12 Aug 2020 at 10:30 PM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



17 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2020-08-12 9:38:25 PM  
Those were pretty good.  The last one did not blur the doctors name though, so that was probably an oversight.
 
2020-08-12 10:38:16 PM  
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I am sooooo doing something like this.

I keep getting these texts messages and phone calls from people wanting I buy my house..
 
2020-08-12 10:58:22 PM  

blastoh: [Fark user image 425x488]

I am sooooo doing something like this.

I keep getting these texts messages and phone calls from people wanting I buy my house..


There is someone (Sue, actually) who for the last six months has been using my phone number on real estate sights. Apparently, Sue wants to buy a house.

The result is that I receive about ten texts from realtors a day. Well, not actual realtors, but their crappy software that robo-texts little snippets like "Hi Sue, I noticed you were interested in 123 Mockingbird Lane. When would be a good time to discuss a walk-through?" And similar. They're not one-time texts, either. They keep at it day after day after day.

At first I thought it was malicious - as it turns out, you can input anyone's phone number into real estate listings and they will be text spammed into oblivion. The reality is that Sue doesn't know her own damn phone number.

Anyway, now at the end of every day I take the text message phone numbers and enter each of them into random competitors' listings online. Now all of the real estate agent bots are texting all the other real estate texting bots. I hope I'm creating a rat-king of text bots.

Yay technology.
 
2020-08-12 11:13:09 PM  

Dr._Michael_Hfuhruhurr: blastoh: [Fark user image 425x488]

I am sooooo doing something like this.

I keep getting these texts messages and phone calls from people wanting I buy my house..

There is someone (Sue, actually) who for the last six months has been using my phone number on real estate sights. Apparently, Sue wants to buy a house.

The result is that I receive about ten texts from realtors a day. Well, not actual realtors, but their crappy software that robo-texts little snippets like "Hi Sue, I noticed you were interested in 123 Mockingbird Lane. When would be a good time to discuss a walk-through?" And similar. They're not one-time texts, either. They keep at it day after day after day.

At first I thought it was malicious - as it turns out, you can input anyone's phone number into real estate listings and they will be text spammed into oblivion. The reality is that Sue doesn't know her own damn phone number.

Anyway, now at the end of every day I take the text message phone numbers and enter each of them into random competitors' listings online. Now all of the real estate agent bots are texting all the other real estate texting bots. I hope I'm creating a rat-king of text bots.

Yay technology.


you know.... this is how skynet started right?
 
2020-08-12 11:34:38 PM  

Dr._Michael_Hfuhruhurr: blastoh: [Fark user image 425x488]

I am sooooo doing something like this.

I keep getting these texts messages and phone calls from people wanting I buy my house..

There is someone (Sue, actually) who for the last six months has been using my phone number on real estate sights. Apparently, Sue wants to buy a house.

The result is that I receive about ten texts from realtors a day. Well, not actual realtors, but their crappy software that robo-texts little snippets like "Hi Sue, I noticed you were interested in 123 Mockingbird Lane. When would be a good time to discuss a walk-through?" And similar. They're not one-time texts, either. They keep at it day after day after day.

At first I thought it was malicious - as it turns out, you can input anyone's phone number into real estate listings and they will be text spammed into oblivion. The reality is that Sue doesn't know her own damn phone number.

Anyway, now at the end of every day I take the text message phone numbers and enter each of them into random competitors' listings online. Now all of the real estate agent bots are texting all the other real estate texting bots. I hope I'm creating a rat-king of text bots.

Yay technology.


This is glorious.  And I award you a hundred bonus Internet points for the mention of Rat Kings - something I learned about fairly recently, thanks to Sir Pratchett.
 
2020-08-12 11:50:04 PM  
But you can't prank text anyone.
 
2020-08-12 11:50:38 PM  
Though now that I pause to remember more details of that story, maybe making a Rat King isn't a good idea!  Blastoh may be right!

PS.  I hope you're behind seven proxies when you enter those numbers.
 
2020-08-13 12:42:53 AM  
CSS: Some years ago I got a text from a Las Vegas area code that simply said,

Hey! Rate / location?

I quickly texted my friend, who is a Funny Guy, to ask what I should respond with. His response, which I passed along:

My rate is $5.95. Meet me back behind Dick's Last Resort.

Sadly, I did not get a reply.
 
2020-08-13 12:50:05 AM  
That farking kitten one cracked me the fark up. I was absolutely sure that the person had figured out that they had texted the wrong person and were just going along for the fun of it. Then there was that last line...

Holy shiat, how do you have that conversation and not know that the other person is farking with you?
 
2020-08-13 12:55:20 AM  
Dammit, "I thought you had the baby" made me laugh even harder, which isn't cool, because I had a skin biopsy on my abdomen today, and it had finally stopped hurting.

You're going to burn in Hell subby!
 
2020-08-13 4:00:09 AM  
I like the ones sabotaged by autocorrect.

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2020-08-13 8:25:06 AM  
Best.

static.boredpanda.comView Full Size
 
2020-08-13 9:16:51 AM  
Early in the quarantine I started getting wrong number texts from a very sweet old lady who was trying to check in on her friend every few days.  She just seemed to not be able to figure out how to update the contact or what have you.

So I kept sending her back "Hey, wrong number again, but here's a picture of the progress we've made on building up our garden beds, the kids love playing on the fallen tree next to it".

We actually kind of kept up with each other for a month or two.  But then I think she figured out how to fix the contact and it stopped.
 
2020-08-13 9:57:00 AM  
When I got the number I have now, it was from my job at the time. Apparently the gal that had it before tended to get around. I got months' worth of "Hey babe, you up for a little get together?" texts from different guys. I started informing them they had the wrong number until I finally decided that I'd had enough, and I got to the edge of full-on sexting with this dude for like two weeks straight before he finally figured out that someone else had the number. Like, everything but posting Penthouse Forums stuff in a text...

6 months later, she came back to work for the company. She was out of our HQ, but I had to do remote support with her on multiple occasions. I was always afraid that she'd find out from the dude and rip into me. It was fun, though... Not anywhere near as cool as the ones here, but still fun.
 
2020-08-13 10:28:19 AM  
I'll be keeping this one for a long time. This exchange between myself and some woman I've never met occurred over a year ago. I still fund it amusing.

Tried to post earlier, but because the woman who was texting me used a homophobic slur, my post was rejected. (It didn't occur to me to remove/replace it. Whoops.)

Unknown Person: "Who is this you must have been at my house yesterday because you left this in my bathroom "

Unknown Person: "So who are you do you know <guy's name removed for this post>"
me: "I haven't the slightest idea what or who you're talking about. You must have the wrong number."

Unknown Person: "Do you know anyone in Somerville tx this number was left on my bathroom counter and I'm wondering if my husband is farking around o how I part he is so I can finally have a reason to leave his ass"

At this point, she sent a few pictures, one a screenshot of the other girl in question's contact info, and two of the note left in the bathroom, which included the phone number.

Unknown Person: "I didn't pull this out my ass it was in my bathroom so someone you know or maybe yourself was at my house"

me: "Wow, that's...bizarre at best. I don't know what to tell you. I just got this number about a month ago. Also, I'm a guy."

Unknown Person: "Maybe it was whoever had this number last or someone left a fake number?"

Unknown Person: "Well I don't think my husband is <homophobic slur> but I know he'd definitely cheat if had the chance do you know a <guy's name removed for this post> or <other guy's name removed for this post>"

me: "No, sorry, I don't. And my wife and I have been happily married for 20+ years."

Unknown Person: "No I don't believe that shiat someone was there when I left to bring my son to probation who went to jail yesterday the truth will come out one day do you know <girl's name removed for this post> her name is also on the paper"

Me: "I don't doubt what you're saying. It's hard to argue with a picture. I can only tell you that I'm not involved. I work. I get groceries. I come home. That's pretty much the extent of my activities."

Me: "I do not know anyone named <girl's name removed for this post>."

Unknown Person: "This is crazy and I have a feeling my husband is cheating on me and then I find this next to his clothes on the bathroom counter who are you if you don't mind me asking"

Unknown Person: "I'm not mad I've been looking for a reason to leave"

Me: "I prefer not to reveal personal details to someone I've never met (nothing personal, but I'm a private person who won't even go on facebook) I cannot give you any suggestions beyond you have to do what you think is right."

Unknown Person: "Well I'm gonna take it he's cheating and he's fixing to get farked up before I leave"

Me: "Well, its none of my business, but be safe and don't do anything rash. The number one person you need to take care of is you. Whatever happens, I wish you good luck."

Unknown Person: "I'm good I'll cut his dick off shove it in his ass and walk away with a smile on my face"

Me: "No, sorry. Besides my wife, the only people I know within 150 miles of me are the people I work with."

Unknown Person: "Hum you could be a woman how do I know your telling the truth but whatever the truth always come out and I just posted all over Facebook because I'm an evil biatch"

Me: "I suppose there's no way to prove that given my reluctance to provide personal information."

Me: "For that, I apologize as this appears to be a very difficult situation for you."

Me: "Having said that, however, my wife is starting to lose her patience with me, so it would be best, for me anyway, if we do not continue this conversation."

Unknown Person: "I'm done with this shiat you can't prove your a man or woman this was next to my husbands clothes on the bathroom counter in my room after he refused to come with me yesterday knowing my son was going to jail so yeah I think it is what it is"
 
2020-08-13 6:24:07 PM  
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a fun exchange a couple years ago. Get a text from a number I don't know:

"Yo girl what's up. It's Joe from the club saturday night. Remember me?"

"Wrong number dude.

"Girl stop playing. I need to see you, bad."

"Dude seriously, wrong number."

"Why you trying to play me like that? You weren't like this saturday LOL"

"Dude. WRONG. NUMBER. please stop texting me."

Then this happened. I'm on the right.
 
2020-08-13 6:29:27 PM  
Another fun one.....wife took oldest to the movies, the deal being she'd drop her off (to see a movie with 2-3 friends), and one of the girls' mothers would drop her off.  Wife gave me friend's number.

at say, 630PM, I write, "hey thanks for agreeing to drop [name of daughter] off, [wife
s name] told me the plan, I appreciate it."

No response.

Movie ends around 9 or so, the girls were going to ice cream afterwards.  "Hey, hope they had fun, our address in case my wife didn't give it to you is 123 Jones street, just about 10 minutes from the theater."

No response.

an hour later, now I'm a little confused.  "Just checking to make sure you got those texts."

now I get a response:   "Hi, sorry, I don't know who you are and I don't have kids or know your wife, I just ignored them.  Sorry."

I couldn't help myself and wrote back:  "Oh, ok.  I'm sorry I bugged you.  But would you mind picking my daughter up anyways?  You have my address thanks."

She writes back:  "OMG LOL!!!"
 
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