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(The Bitter Southerner)   This author tours Kentucky's Noah's Ark so you don't have to   (bittersoutherner.com) divider line
    More: Interesting, Young Earth creationism, Answers in Genesis, Creationism, Ark Encounter, Institute for Creation Research, Creation Museum, Evangelicalism, Ken Ham  
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432 clicks; posted to Discussion » on 11 Aug 2020 at 3:50 PM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2020-08-11 2:53:19 PM  
I love The Bitter Southerner.
 
2020-08-11 3:07:45 PM  
Obligatory in these threads:

duluthreader.comView Full Size
 
2020-08-11 3:13:46 PM  
One reviewer noted that "it was odd to see dinosaurs on the ark."

Fark user imageView Full Size



The Ark Encounter argues that the location of fossils discovered throughout the Earth's substrata tells us nothing about their age, or the eons that scientists claim separated them; instead, these remains are located wherever the floodwaters deposited them as they swept across the Earth's surface and retreated.

That's not an argument, that is idiocy.
 
2020-08-11 3:19:58 PM  
Of all the stories in the Bible, as a child I found the Noah's Ark story to be the least believable. Allow me to explain.

As a wannabe filmmaker, I know there is such a thing as "suspension of disbelief". Most of the stories in the Bible are explained by "God did it". OK. You can't argue with that. If a Jedi moves things with his mind or chokes a biatch, he uses the Force. In that universe we have to accept that The Force exists. So that's logical in its own way. A story has its own set of rules that are consistent.

In the Noah story, Noah builds a boat without God's help... and that's the important part. He gathers animals of every species, even ones we haven't even discovered ourselves yet. And gets them to fark on a boat. That violates the concept of suspension of disbelief because there's no simple "God did it". If God himself created the Ark and transported the animals, it would be "believable".

That's what makes the story less believable than Christ's resurrection or the burning bush because it eliminates the supernatural aspect. We're expected to believe that just some guy did it all.

Then there's the issue of the thousands of different creatures that now exist because of the animals on that boat. They say that they collected one of each "kind" of animal. For there to go from those few animals to thousands of different species, there would have to be a system called....something that begins with the letter "E".

And there's the whole thing that if God had to destroy the whole world that he farked up the first time. That doesn't sound like an omnipotent being to me, it sounds like me playing Civilization VI without going through the tutorial.

I'm an agnostic, I don't know WTF is going on. But the Noah's Ark tale is just bad writing.
 
2020-08-11 3:59:25 PM  
Noah way Christians have 2 brains cells to rub together.
 
2020-08-11 4:04:45 PM  

Mugato: Of all the stories in the Bible, as a child I found the Noah's Ark story to be the least believable. Allow me to explain.

As a wannabe filmmaker, I know there is such a thing as "suspension of disbelief". Most of the stories in the Bible are explained by "God did it". OK. You can't argue with that. If a Jedi moves things with his mind or chokes a biatch, he uses the Force. In that universe we have to accept that The Force exists. So that's logical in its own way. A story has its own set of rules that are consistent.

In the Noah story, Noah builds a boat without God's help... and that's the important part. He gathers animals of every species, even ones we haven't even discovered ourselves yet. And gets them to fark on a boat. That violates the concept of suspension of disbelief because there's no simple "God did it". If God himself created the Ark and transported the animals, it would be "believable".

That's what makes the story less believable than Christ's resurrection or the burning bush because it eliminates the supernatural aspect. We're expected to believe that just some guy did it all.

Then there's the issue of the thousands of different creatures that now exist because of the animals on that boat. They say that they collected one of each "kind" of animal. For there to go from those few animals to thousands of different species, there would have to be a system called....something that begins with the letter "E".

And there's the whole thing that if God had to destroy the whole world that he farked up the first time. That doesn't sound like an omnipotent being to me, it sounds like me playing Civilization VI without going through the tutorial.

I'm an agnostic, I don't know WTF is going on. But the Noah's Ark tale is just bad writing.


And all that before you consider the part where an elderly farmer and his three middle-aged sons, who had nary a minute of shipbuilding experience between the four of them, managed to build a seaworthy wooden ship bigger than the USS Constitution in only eight days.
 
2020-08-11 4:06:34 PM  

UberDave: One reviewer noted that "it was odd to see dinosaurs on the ark."

[Fark user image 400x267]


The Ark Encounter argues that the location of fossils discovered throughout the Earth's substrata tells us nothing about their age, or the eons that scientists claim separated them; instead, these remains are located wherever the floodwaters deposited them as they swept across the Earth's surface and retreated.

That's not an argument, that is idiocy.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-11 6:29:41 PM  

Mugato: Of all the stories in the Bible, as a child I found the Noah's Ark story to be the least believable. Allow me to explain.

As a wannabe filmmaker, I know there is such a thing as "suspension of disbelief". Most of the stories in the Bible are explained by "God did it". OK. You can't argue with that. If a Jedi moves things with his mind or chokes a biatch, he uses the Force. In that universe we have to accept that The Force exists. So that's logical in its own way. A story has its own set of rules that are consistent.

In the Noah story, Noah builds a boat without God's help... and that's the important part. He gathers animals of every species, even ones we haven't even discovered ourselves yet. And gets them to fark on a boat. That violates the concept of suspension of disbelief because there's no simple "God did it". If God himself created the Ark and transported the animals, it would be "believable".

That's what makes the story less believable than Christ's resurrection or the burning bush because it eliminates the supernatural aspect. We're expected to believe that just some guy did it all.

Then there's the issue of the thousands of different creatures that now exist because of the animals on that boat. They say that they collected one of each "kind" of animal. For there to go from those few animals to thousands of different species, there would have to be a system called....something that begins with the letter "E".

And there's the whole thing that if God had to destroy the whole world that he farked up the first time. That doesn't sound like an omnipotent being to me, it sounds like me playing Civilization VI without going through the tutorial.

I'm an agnostic, I don't know WTF is going on. But the Noah's Ark tale is just bad writing.


Like most of the bible, it was stolen from other civlizations folk tales.
 
2020-08-11 6:29:53 PM  

Unobtanium: Obligatory in these threads:

[duluthreader.com image 600x336]


Can *somebody* please fire up Photos hop and fix that damned misspelling?

The word "Sturctures" is driving me bananas!
 
2020-08-11 6:35:30 PM  

Nicholas D. Wolfwood: Photos hop


*tsk, tsk, tsk*

:)
 
2020-08-11 7:06:56 PM  

Mugato: Of all the stories in the Bible, as a child I found the Noah's Ark story to be the least believable. Allow me to explain.


shiat, the head priest at my childhood church told me to not take Genesis literally.  It's all metaphor and allegory.  But then, he was also embezzling hundreds of thousands of dollars from the parish to fund his brownstone in Old Town Alexandria, where he and his girlfriend lived.  I'm not sure there's a moral here.
 
2020-08-11 7:07:45 PM  

Unobtanium: Obligatory in these threads:

[duluthreader.com image 600x336]


"Noah's Tyvek" ALWAYS makes me giggle.
 
2020-08-11 7:09:27 PM  
The Ark park has fallen on hard times.  Used to be it could count on posts in the triple digits around here.  Now it registers a "meh". Barely.
 
2020-08-11 7:49:40 PM  

Nicholas D. Wolfwood: Unobtanium: Obligatory in these threads:

[duluthreader.com image 600x336]

Can *somebody* please fire up Photos hop and fix that damned misspelling?

The word "Sturctures" is driving me bananas!


I'm also angry that they call a diesel tank a propane tank.
 
2020-08-11 7:59:53 PM  

Nicholas D. Wolfwood: Unobtanium: Obligatory in these threads:

[duluthreader.com image 600x336]

Can *somebody* please fire up Photos hop and fix that damned misspelling?

The word "Sturctures" is driving me bananas!


Ermahgerd, sturctures.
 
2020-08-11 8:01:19 PM  

UberDave: One reviewer noted that "it was odd to see dinosaurs on the ark."

[Fark user image 400x267]


The Ark Encounter argues that the location of fossils discovered throughout the Earth's substrata tells us nothing about their age, or the eons that scientists claim separated them; instead, these remains are located wherever the floodwaters deposited them as they swept across the Earth's surface and retreated.

That's not an argument, that is idiocy.


It would be so much simpler to posit that the dinosaurs perished in the flood.  That is what creationists did, back in the days of the Monkey Trials.
 
2020-08-11 8:03:01 PM  
When we arrived at the Ark Encounter, just a few minutes after it opened for the day, the parking lot was already full.

Actually, I find that surprising.  I thought they were not pulling in the crowds.  The skeptic videos show a reception area build to handle throngs of people queueing up to enter, but it is empty.
 
2020-08-11 8:28:52 PM  
I don't understand why god told Noah to load the ark with two of each animal.  Couldn't he have saved a lot of room if he had just ordered one pregnant female of each?  That might explain the loss of the unicorns...that particular animal probably gave birth to a female.

Yes...I know...that also would have made all the offspring motherfarkers.
 
2020-08-11 9:22:19 PM  

Mugato: Of all the stories in the Bible, as a child I found the Noah's Ark story to be the least believable. Allow me to explain.

As a wannabe filmmaker, I know there is such a thing as "suspension of disbelief". Most of the stories in the Bible are explained by "God did it". OK. You can't argue with that. If a Jedi moves things with his mind or chokes a biatch, he uses the Force. In that universe we have to accept that The Force exists. So that's logical in its own way. A story has its own set of rules that are consistent.

In the Noah story, Noah builds a boat without God's help... and that's the important part. He gathers animals of every species, even ones we haven't even discovered ourselves yet. And gets them to fark on a boat. That violates the concept of suspension of disbelief because there's no simple "God did it". If God himself created the Ark and transported the animals, it would be "believable".

That's what makes the story less believable than Christ's resurrection or the burning bush because it eliminates the supernatural aspect. We're expected to believe that just some guy did it all.

Then there's the issue of the thousands of different creatures that now exist because of the animals on that boat. They say that they collected one of each "kind" of animal. For there to go from those few animals to thousands of different species, there would have to be a system called....something that begins with the letter "E".

And there's the whole thing that if God had to destroy the whole world that he farked up the first time. That doesn't sound like an omnipotent being to me, it sounds like me playing Civilization VI without going through the tutorial.

I'm an agnostic, I don't know WTF is going on. But the Noah's Ark tale is just bad writing.


I always viewed it as seen from their world.  Most people never went more than a few miles from where they were born back then.  Especially simple people.  I know there were traders and people like that who travelled, but most lived right where they were born until they died.

To one of those people, it was the entire world that was destroyed.  And as for all the animals, it was all the animals they saw within 10 miles of their house, so it wasn't every animal species on the planet, just the ones they knew about.  Thrown in some mild exaggeration with the size and 40 days and 40 nights and the size of the boat, which in retelling the story got bigger and bigger because other people knew about how many animals were on the planet and then it became the story it is.
 
2020-08-11 9:28:19 PM  

ecmoRandomNumbers: Nicholas D. Wolfwood: Photos hop

*tsk, tsk, tsk*

:)


Yeah, I hate Farking on my phone.  The screen protector got messed up and it's screwing with the keyboard.   I have to watch this thing like a hawk.
 
2020-08-11 9:33:45 PM  
My husband and I had been in high spirits on the hour-long drive from Louisville, listening to music and pointing out bands of deer grazing in the fields on either side of the highway. Northern Kentucky is a landscape of in-betweens: not quite hilly or flat; neither wholly southern or midwestern. The land itself, in mid-February, seemed to hover between seasons: the yellow winter grass was crisp with frost, while the morning's sun was so warm I didn't need a coat.

Let me guess. The author was paid by the word for this.
 
2020-08-11 10:56:21 PM  
Religious theme parks fascinate me so if I'm ever in Kentucky I might just have to check it out.

The Holy Land experience in Orlando is fascinating. It's sort of Disney World for people who want to visit the Holy Land.

Some people were genuinely moved to tears by their stage show crucifixion complete with handsome, white Jesus Christ superstar. I wouldn't pay full price for it, but for $12 bucks it was
decent, not Dino World quality, but better than Jellystone in Arizona.
 
2020-08-11 11:51:55 PM  

UberDave: One reviewer noted that "it was odd to see dinosaurs on the ark."

[Fark user image image 400x267]


The Ark Encounter argues that the location of fossils discovered throughout the Earth's substrata tells us nothing about their age, or the eons that scientists claim separated them; instead, these remains are located wherever the floodwaters deposited them as they swept across the Earth's surface and retreated.

That's not an argument, that is idiocy.


they jumped ship and drowned thats why we dont have dinos --

/the stupid, it breeds
 
2020-08-12 3:00:23 AM  

Gordon Bennett: My husband and I had been in high spirits on the hour-long drive from Louisville, listening to music and pointing out bands of deer grazing in the fields on either side of the highway. Northern Kentucky is a landscape of in-betweens: not quite hilly or flat; neither wholly southern or midwestern. The land itself, in mid-February, seemed to hover between seasons: the yellow winter grass was crisp with frost, while the morning's sun was so warm I didn't need a coat.

Let me guess. The author was paid by the word for this.


She also writes a ton of Instapot blogs where she writes 10 column-inches about how she and her husband discovered the joys of lentils, before finally showing you the f*cking recipe.
 
2020-08-12 7:40:10 AM  

Gordon Bennett: My husband and I had been in high spirits on the hour-long drive from Louisville, listening to music and pointing out bands of deer grazing in the fields on either side of the highway. Northern Kentucky is a landscape of in-betweens: not quite hilly or flat; neither wholly southern or midwestern. The land itself, in mid-February, seemed to hover between seasons: the yellow winter grass was crisp with frost, while the morning's sun was so warm I didn't need a coat.

Let me guess. The author was paid by the word for this.


Column inch...
 
2020-08-12 9:38:26 AM  
I want to open a Jonah's Experience attraction.  It's a beach with a giant dead whale on it, covered in vomit.  Visitors can roll around in the vomit and pretend they are Jonah.
 
2020-08-12 12:22:55 PM  
 
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