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(YouTube)   Ugh, here we go again. News conference starting at Trump O'clock   (youtube.com) divider line
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674 clicks; posted to Discussion » and Politics » on 10 Aug 2020 at 5:28 PM (16 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

 
2020-08-10 5:30:24 PM  
47 votes:
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2020-08-10 5:58:10 PM  
25 votes:

King Something: Trump hasn't finished that quickly since the day before Ivanka's 18th birthday



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2020-08-10 6:34:45 PM  
21 votes:
He wants to make a Gettysburg address:

"Four whores and seven NDAs ago..."
 
2020-08-10 5:29:53 PM  
19 votes:
He's going to announce Oprah Winfrey as Joe Biden's running mate, and there's nothing Joe or Oprah can do about it.
 
2020-08-10 6:14:32 PM  
16 votes:
Bet it was Melania trying to escape.  Hit her with the dart gun!

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2020-08-10 5:59:46 PM  
14 votes:
He probably heard a gunshot and rushed into the nearest school to stop the shooter.
 
2020-08-10 5:54:29 PM  
14 votes:
"Mr. President, your prostitute is here"
 
2020-08-10 5:35:16 PM  
14 votes:
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2020-08-10 5:31:38 PM  
14 votes:
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What do you get when you guzzle down sweets?
Eating as much as an elephant eats
What are you at, getting terribly fat?
What do you think will come of that?
I don't like the look of it...
 
2020-08-10 6:35:07 PM  
13 votes:
Have you considered giving your concession speech from Appomattox?
 
2020-08-10 6:02:56 PM  
13 votes:

Captain_Max_Radius: He's back


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2020-08-10 5:35:32 PM  
11 votes:
i.chzbgr.comView Full Size
 
rpm
2020-08-10 5:33:15 PM  
11 votes:

King Something: Drinking game rules are simple: Don't, unless you want to die of alcohol poisoning.


Drink every time he tells the truth. No worry about alcohol poisoning. Dehydration maybe.
 
2020-08-10 6:08:25 PM  
10 votes:
Joe Biden's America, everyone.
 
2020-08-10 6:05:09 PM  
9 votes:

tudorgurl: WTF is happening? I just turned it on and he walked off.


You have that effect on women :)
 
2020-08-10 5:54:50 PM  
9 votes:
HALF LIFE 3 CONFIRMED!!!
 
2020-08-10 5:49:13 PM  
9 votes:
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2020-08-10 6:50:29 PM  
8 votes:
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2020-08-10 6:46:56 PM  
8 votes:
The pandemic of 1917 ended the second world war
 
2020-08-10 6:15:29 PM  
8 votes:
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 6:09:52 PM  
8 votes:
Anyone posted this yet?
thumbs.gfycat.comView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 6:01:16 PM  
8 votes:
Sorry everyone, just a scheduling mishap. WH had a bunker inspection scheduled for 5:45.
 
2020-08-10 5:54:39 PM  
8 votes:
"Mr. President, your hamberders are here."
 
2020-08-10 5:51:23 PM  
8 votes:
Voted LIKE A DOG
 
2020-08-10 5:29:22 PM  
8 votes:
He's going to tell us he invented tables and Jupiter.  Then *smokebomb* the hell outta there.
 
2020-08-10 6:55:02 PM  
7 votes:

Blahbbs: OldRod: peter21: Will Trump mention the very fine people on both sides if he accepts the nomination at Gettysburg? Does he even know who fought at Gettysburg?

Estelle Getty?

Golden Toilet, golden drapes, Golden Girl...


That would certainly fill the newspapers with...

[puts on sunglasses]

Getty Images.
 
2020-08-10 6:43:57 PM  
7 votes:

Rann Xerox: Trump wanted to give his acceptance speech at Nuremberg but the Germans said "NO!"


Actually they said "Nein!" and he said, "No, I just want to do one speech..."
 
2020-08-10 6:24:21 PM  
7 votes:

thehobbes: Secret Service just pulled him out...


Of Ivanka?
 
2020-08-10 6:07:24 PM  
7 votes:

scottydoesntknow: thehobbes: Lol. "World is a dangerous place"

he's the most protected person on the planet.

By tonight, he'll claim the shooter was coming for him but his super awesome mind detected it minutes before the shooter could do it.

This has nothing to do with him passing out in his chair with a half-eaten Big Mac watching Minority Report last night.


I'm waiting for the QAnon posts where Trump ran out to punch the intruder in the face. Crying eagle, waving flag, etc.
 
2020-08-10 6:05:41 PM  
7 votes:
Hahaha, Trump is being bombarded with shooter questions, he looks peeved that he can't talk about his topics.
 
2020-08-10 5:41:17 PM  
7 votes:

Flincher: A trump thread you say? [media2.giphy.com image 304x360] [View Full Size image _x_]


bobug: [i.chzbgr.com image 425x354]


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 5:34:03 PM  
7 votes:
i.makeagif.comView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 6:51:54 PM  
6 votes:
Joker
Youtube eRaUGLwn_kM
 
2020-08-10 6:32:51 PM  
6 votes:
How about an EO mandating the force of gravity worldwide?
 
2020-08-10 6:28:43 PM  
6 votes:
media.makeameme.orgView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 6:24:50 PM  
6 votes:
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2020-08-10 6:20:13 PM  
6 votes:

OldRod: I came in late... why'd they rush him out of the room earlier?


He thought he was near a book depository but realized he can't read
 
2020-08-10 6:15:40 PM  
6 votes:
It would have been great if he had a catsup stain on his tie when he came back.
 
2020-08-10 6:14:05 PM  
6 votes:
"Science-based approach"

Narrator: Piss off, I'm trying to spank it to giraffe porn
 
2020-08-10 6:10:47 PM  
6 votes:
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 6:05:23 PM  
6 votes:
Jesus the one time I decide to take a break from this nonsense something goes full potato.
 
2020-08-10 6:04:56 PM  
6 votes:
They shot Ladder!  It was a coup attempt!
 
2020-08-10 6:01:46 PM  
6 votes:
Ugh, he's back. Time to turn the channel.
 
2020-08-10 6:01:11 PM  
6 votes:

Todd300: [YouTube video: Trump whisked away mid press briefing by Secret Service]


The threat is coming from inside the house.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 6:00:19 PM  
6 votes:

AtomPeepers: He's going to gas all the reporters!


static.tvtropes.orgView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 5:59:29 PM  
6 votes:

theToadMan: NeoCortex42: Is this like "call my phone in case the date is going poorly" kind of deal?

exactly what I was thinking. He was about to go seriously off the rails so they had to control the toddler with fake security threats


The eagle is sundown!  I repeat, the eagle is sundown!
 
2020-08-10 5:58:45 PM  
6 votes:

raerae1980: Skeleton Man: I know how these threads go so here's something to liven the mood and remind you of what's really important: titties.

[thechive.com image 400x690]

[thechive.com image 400x600]

[thechive.com image 400x500]

Now post some hot guys for balance.


Some Rick Moranis for the ladies.

Fark user imageView Full Size


https://thehardtimes.net/blog/rick-mo​r​anis-is-back-and-hes-here-to-fark/
 
2020-08-10 5:58:20 PM  
6 votes:

thehobbes: I hereby demand that I be given a Fark account: thehobbes: Shots fired near the White House.

Are you guessing or reporting?

Reporting- John Roberts of Fox said so.


So he trying to be the first to run on the scene and save everyone, right?
 
2020-08-10 5:57:44 PM  
6 votes:

saturn badger: MSNBC - press and WH locked down. Dogs and SS wandering about.


Voting dogs, no less.
 
2020-08-10 5:55:10 PM  
6 votes:
He crapped himself, again.
 
2020-08-10 5:53:36 PM  
6 votes:
He's going to gas all the reporters!
 
2020-08-10 5:49:18 PM  
6 votes:
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 5:42:33 PM  
6 votes:

pueblonative: Gestalt: Let's see if someone from the media asks him what he means by "take care of Iran." Or does anything to hold him to account for his vague statement of intent.

Just ask him the difference between an appropriations law and an EO.


Ask him how a bill becomes a law.
 
2020-08-10 7:57:28 PM  
5 votes:
Today I learned the 1917 pandemic probably stopped the second world war. Thanks professor Trump!
 
2020-08-10 6:41:24 PM  
5 votes:
Trump wanted to give his acceptance speech at Nuremberg but the Germans said "NO!"
 
2020-08-10 6:39:15 PM  
5 votes:
Other countries will "own" America if Biden wins
 
2020-08-10 6:38:16 PM  
5 votes:

OldRod: He looks pissed that someone is asking Mnuchin questions


He has to be the corpse at every wedding
 
2020-08-10 6:37:33 PM  
5 votes:
Steve Mnuchin looks like a penis face.
 
2020-08-10 6:35:07 PM  
5 votes:
Oh, oh, they judged the dose wrong.
 
2020-08-10 6:31:09 PM  
5 votes:

nic_naprawda: you pay to not have to pay, to have to pay, to pay for not paying to have to pay for.  ugh, my reset button just fired


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 6:18:28 PM  
5 votes:

OldRod: I came in late... why'd they rush him out of the room earlier?


He crapped his pants
 
2020-08-10 6:17:48 PM  
5 votes:
Wow, the wall will stop the virus.
 
2020-08-10 6:13:37 PM  
5 votes:
NEW: photos show monsoon floods ripping through #BorderWall construction site in the San Bernardino Valley. @DHSgov has ignored agency scientists & steamrolled public input to build this absurd, wildlife-killing wall through the stunning Arizona borderlands. pic.twitter.com/OL077Xre0Y

- Laiken Jordahl (@LaikenJordahl) August 10, 2020


Fark user imageView Full Size


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2020-08-10 6:04:13 PM  
5 votes:
Every Trump announcement to America=
memegenerator.netView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 6:03:48 PM  
5 votes:
Secret Service shot someone, someone going to the hospital.

/"You idiot! That was one of Barr's people!"
 
2020-08-10 6:03:41 PM  
5 votes:
Stopped by "VERY POWERFUL" fencing.
 
2020-08-10 6:01:47 PM  
5 votes:
"Sir, you new golf balls have arrived."
 
2020-08-10 6:00:39 PM  
5 votes:
SS heard he was shooting his mouth off and overreacted.
 
2020-08-10 5:54:42 PM  
5 votes:

Maud Dib: Wow, Bunker Boy scurried away.


The Big Macs must be ready down in the bunker.
 
2020-08-10 5:47:25 PM  
5 votes:
He's going to EO college football hack onto the gridiron.
 
2020-08-10 5:40:47 PM  
5 votes:
In contrast to that interview with that Aussie, I'm looking forward to this event swirling down the drain in the traditional direction.
 
2020-08-10 5:34:43 PM  
5 votes:
I want to see one of these press briefings, where all the reporters pick a bathroom stall in the White House, post a pic of themselves sitting on the can, and Tweetstorm, live, their coverage from there.
 
2020-08-10 5:19:43 PM  
5 votes:
Drinking game rules are simple: Don't, unless you want to die of alcohol poisoning.
 
2020-08-10 6:50:30 PM  
4 votes:
Yes, I have that Joker video ready
 
2020-08-10 6:48:51 PM  
4 votes:

Reverend J: King Something: The pandemic of 1917 ended the second world war

The war ended after the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor.


But the victims of the Bowling Green massacre will be forever remembered
 
2020-08-10 6:47:56 PM  
4 votes:

King Something: The pandemic of 1917 ended the second world war


The war ended after the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor.
 
2020-08-10 6:41:33 PM  
4 votes:
How does he have a coke problem AND a weight problem?
 
2020-08-10 6:40:00 PM  
4 votes:

OldRod: peter21: Will Trump mention the very fine people on both sides if he accepts the nomination at Gettysburg? Does he even know who fought at Gettysburg?

Estelle Getty?


Yes, she fought evil Canadian invader Geddy Lee.
 
2020-08-10 6:38:46 PM  
4 votes:

peter21: Will Trump mention the very fine people on both sides if he accepts the nomination at Gettysburg? Does he even know who fought at Gettysburg?


Estelle Getty?
 
2020-08-10 6:31:35 PM  
4 votes:

Reverend J: Why would you need an executive order if there's already a law on the exact same thing?


Haha a reporter read your question out loud. :P
 
2020-08-10 6:20:16 PM  
4 votes:
Fark user imageView Full Size

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2020-08-10 6:18:39 PM  
4 votes:
Gee whiz mr. President sure sounds like things are going great. I'm going to sweep the dead from the streets and then go on a shopping spree!
 
2020-08-10 6:18:27 PM  
4 votes:

OldRod: I came in late... why'd they rush him out of the room earlier?


Diaper change
 
2020-08-10 6:17:06 PM  
4 votes:

No Line For Beer: I've got to stop playing the Trump speech game; my liver can't take the abuse.


Username, uh, checks out?
 
2020-08-10 6:08:27 PM  
4 votes:
Ok back on track...

What about contractions? OMG IS TRUMP PREGGERS?!?!
 
2020-08-10 6:05:17 PM  
4 votes:

fiddlehead: Stopped by "VERY POWERFUL" fencing.


64.media.tumblr.comView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 6:04:14 PM  
4 votes:
"Throughout the centuries the world has been a dangerous place".

ROFL!!!!
 
2020-08-10 6:03:04 PM  
4 votes:
He's back. So brave! This is his Teddy Roosevelt moment!

/I wouldn't be surprised in the least bit if this were staged.
 
2020-08-10 5:57:52 PM  
4 votes:
Back to the bunker.
 
2020-08-10 5:56:50 PM  
4 votes:
Is this like "call my phone in case the date is going poorly" kind of deal?
 
2020-08-10 5:52:38 PM  
4 votes:
Whar go?
 
2020-08-10 5:51:02 PM  
4 votes:
I know who my dog's voting for.
 
2020-08-10 5:38:13 PM  
4 votes:

Jesterling: [Fark user image 497x447]


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 5:30:43 PM  
4 votes:

sigdiamond2000: He's going to announce Oprah Winfrey as Joe Biden's running mate, and there's nothing Joe or Oprah can do about it.


Yeah he'll EO it.
 
2020-08-10 7:52:11 PM  
3 votes:

OldRod: I came in late... why'd they rush him out of the room earlier?


He crapped his pants so the SS shot some in Lafayette Park for cover.😂
 
2020-08-10 6:48:05 PM  
3 votes:

thehobbes: 1.5-2 million dead if Trump didn't do what he didn't do.


Hey, he saved 450 million people in this country alone, you know!
 
2020-08-10 6:42:07 PM  
3 votes:
If Biden wins, stonks will crash
 
2020-08-10 6:39:51 PM  
3 votes:
If we don't have a deal with China...who will make your crappy, red hats?
 
2020-08-10 6:36:01 PM  
3 votes:
He does know the Confederacy lost at Gettysburg, right?
 
2020-08-10 6:28:02 PM  
3 votes:

AtomPeepers: Kids spread germs and you're not going to be able to convince parents otherwise!


Yeah, like that time Trump caught gonorrhea from his daughter...
 
2020-08-10 6:27:29 PM  
3 votes:
Little disease vectors are immune?

Got it, thanks Dr. Ofnothing.
 
2020-08-10 6:24:50 PM  
3 votes:
Steve Mnuchin looks so much like John Oliver it's frightening.
 
2020-08-10 6:24:22 PM  
3 votes:
LOL, 2 weeks
 
2020-08-10 6:24:21 PM  
3 votes:
Very famous people do not need to be pointed out to an audience.
 
2020-08-10 6:22:12 PM  
3 votes:
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 6:20:26 PM  
3 votes:
I think he's just constantly hitting autofill on his phone and reading what comes off of it.
 
2020-08-10 6:20:06 PM  
3 votes:
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 6:16:37 PM  
3 votes:
They're doing press conferences on 5th Avenue now?
 
2020-08-10 6:16:10 PM  
3 votes:
I've got to stop playing the Trump speech game; my liver can't take the abuse.
 
2020-08-10 6:14:46 PM  
3 votes:
The United Shtates.
 
2020-08-10 6:11:58 PM  
3 votes:

Bennie Crabtree: holy shiat

how does cutting capital gains even MORE lead to creating jobs???


Because when the rich have more money, they'll be more rich.. wait, what was the question?
 
2020-08-10 6:05:53 PM  
3 votes:

Nick Nostril: Called it. Fence jumper.


Fence perimeter is out to the Beltway.
 
2020-08-10 6:05:29 PM  
3 votes:

Bantammenace: CNN reports WH on lockdown, loud noises from Lafayette Park.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 6:00:37 PM  
3 votes:

peter21: erect


Fark user imageView Full Size


/as an added bonus, user name checks out
 
2020-08-10 5:59:54 PM  
3 votes:
Oh good, he's gonna shambles back in and continue
 
2020-08-10 5:59:04 PM  
3 votes:
The OANN fluffer is there today!
 
2020-08-10 5:57:28 PM  
3 votes:
Quick...escort Bunker Boy to the bunker.
Don't use the ramp!
 
2020-08-10 5:56:18 PM  
3 votes:

Knight without armor: "Mr. President, your prostitute is here"


"Mr. President, your prostitute who is equipped with an electron microscope and a pair of tweezers to find your crotch 'shroom is here."
 
2020-08-10 5:54:36 PM  
3 votes:

AtomPeepers: He's going to gas all the reporters!


vignette.wikia.nocookie.netView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 5:52:32 PM  
3 votes:

fiddlehead: PETS ARE GOING TO VOTE.
How are voting officials going to confirm pet signatures?

/This whole claim is absurd.


It's less of a signature and more of a labra-doodle.
 
2020-08-10 5:52:07 PM  
3 votes:
And now for our market report (pay no attention to the dead people)
 
2020-08-10 5:48:50 PM  
3 votes:

King Something: cameroncrazy1984: Is this a Trump presser thread or an NFL Sunday thread?

Yes.


Now ladies and gentlemen, on your feet.. here's the starting lineup for YOUR WHITE HOUSE PRESSER...


Suns intro 1993
Youtube is7jSJ2srpY
 
2020-08-10 5:41:32 PM  
3 votes:

Gestalt: Let's see if someone from the media asks him what he means by "take care of Iran." Or does anything to hold him to account for his vague statement of intent.


Just ask him the difference between an appropriations law and an EO.
 
2020-08-10 6:57:53 PM  
2 votes:

Dancis_Frake: I like how he mentioned the "Obama campaign" despite the fact he was running against Clinton.

Couldn't even get a softball right, no wonder he didn't pitch at that Yankees match.


I sense a European--
 
2020-08-10 6:54:18 PM  
2 votes:
I like how he mentioned the "Obama campaign" despite the fact he was running against Clinton.

Couldn't even get a softball right, no wonder he didn't pitch at that Yankees match.
 
2020-08-10 6:52:46 PM  
2 votes:
Dammit, why do I have to be attracted to Chanel.  It's like looking at a pile of shiat and thinking "Oh, yeah!"  Stupid brain!  Stupid brain!
 
2020-08-10 6:52:28 PM  
2 votes:

SurelyShirley: chucknasty: mail in ballots are fraud. ok. OR and WA have been doing only mail in for a while. seems like we figured it out.

...and you know which way they vote, don't you?


With a black pen usually, why?
 
2020-08-10 6:44:29 PM  
2 votes:
Mail in ballots! People I have a bingo. You can all go home now.
 
2020-08-10 6:42:29 PM  
2 votes:

No Line For Beer: Reverend J: No Line For Beer: Reverend J: You can't have it at the White House dumbass.

He can.
https://www.cbsnews.com/news/trump-del​iver-republican-convention-speech-whit​e-house-legal/

The Hatch Act forbids the use of government buildings and employees for campaign activities, with few exceptions. While the president and vice president are exempt, any White House or government employee who helps facilitate campaign activity risks breaking federal law.

Technically he can, but he has to do everything himself, which is never going to happen.

You're adorable.  There are no consequences to his actions.


Will you let me fantasize for a least a few minutes?
 
2020-08-10 6:40:51 PM  
2 votes:

King Something: Remdesivir

/and the slightly-less-generously-endowed Ramdesivir


The asshole lickers at OANN are on Rimdesivir.
 
2020-08-10 6:39:56 PM  
2 votes:
Wow, November is going to be busy... a new vaccine, a G7 meeting, a deal with Iran...
 
2020-08-10 6:37:15 PM  
2 votes:
the pores down the center of his face have been very pronounced lately. nose, chin, under eyes, forehead. his neck vulva is getting worse as well. is that a side effect of what ever drugs he is on?
 
2020-08-10 6:37:02 PM  
2 votes:

No Line For Beer: Bennie Crabtree: G7..? Which of the G8 is he trying to exclude?

Russia got kicked out.  Trump is trying to get them back in.


Hmm.

At Polish Christmas dinner it is traditional to set an empty place at the table, symbolically, representing the family stopping for food while looking for a manger.

I wouldn't be surprised if Trump left a symbolic empty seat at the table for his saviour, Putin.
 
2020-08-10 6:36:22 PM  
2 votes:

Reverend J: You can't have it at the White House dumbass.


He can.
 
2020-08-10 6:35:53 PM  
2 votes:
iPhone alarm going off in the background, smoke bomb coming.
 
2020-08-10 6:33:58 PM  
2 votes:
No invitations have been sent, but some people have already accepted.
 
2020-08-10 6:33:19 PM  
2 votes:

NeoCortex42: ArkPanda: How long can SS and Medicare run without income? How long until they have to start eating the principal in their funds?

Soylent Green is principal!


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 6:30:10 PM  
2 votes:

AtomPeepers: Steve Mnuchin looks so much like John Oliver it's frightening.


john oliver praising steve mnuchin's appearance for 1 minute
Youtube 6RC_Mcgs44Y
 
2020-08-10 6:29:44 PM  
2 votes:

OldRod: Dems have a "manifesto" now?


and a destiny, too!
 
2020-08-10 6:27:24 PM  
2 votes:

saturn badger: Was that the OAN lady? Cleavage says it was.


I'm not seeing cleavage on my feed... LIBERATE CLEAVAGE!
 
2020-08-10 6:25:07 PM  
2 votes:

undercurrent: 2 weeks... where have we heard this before?


For All Mankind

"we expect to have Apollo 24 to you in.....2 weeks."
 
2020-08-10 6:24:32 PM  
2 votes:

undercurrent: 2 weeks... where have we heard this before?


Two weeks ago, I believe.
 
2020-08-10 6:22:09 PM  
2 votes:
Remdesivir

/and the slightly-less-generously-endowed Ramdesivir
 
2020-08-10 6:21:33 PM  
2 votes:
According to Trump no administration has ever had 3 vaccines pass the FDA during their term.
 
2020-08-10 6:18:51 PM  
2 votes:
assets.hemmings.comView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 6:16:03 PM  
2 votes:

Mad Scientist: Trump says the USPS can't handle the load of mail in ballots. Right now, the USPS handles about 470 million pieces of mail per day. Total votes of Clinton vs Trump was about 128 million. If everyone who votes this year does it by mail on the same day, that's an increase of about 27% of normal load, well below the system's max capacity.  STFU about overwhelming the mail, Donnie.


I was told there would be no math
 
2020-08-10 6:15:02 PM  
2 votes:
"No one like this group."  Except the exact same task force that is being formed in every single nation on the planet.  I'm pretty sure even St. Lucia has a vaccination plan by now even if it's just "When we tell you to, go to Dave's house."
 
2020-08-10 6:14:26 PM  
2 votes:
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 6:11:56 PM  
2 votes:

jayphat: So, we got
-China Virus
-capital gains tax cut
-payroll tax cut

Anyone got a bingo yet?


More testing is why we have the most cases.
BINGO
Hold your cards....
 
2020-08-10 6:10:39 PM  
2 votes:
♬  When danger reared it's ugly head, Trump bravely turned his tail and fled... ♬
 
2020-08-10 6:09:21 PM  
2 votes:

tudorgurl: Ok back on track...

What about contractions? OMG IS TRUMP PREGGERS?!?!


He is a big egg sack full of food babies.
 
2020-08-10 6:09:15 PM  
2 votes:
Already seeing the "President Trump's calm leadership" accolades.
 
2020-08-10 6:05:19 PM  
2 votes:

peter21: Sorry everyone, just a scheduling mishap. WH had a bunker inspection scheduled for 5:45.


Is that what they're calling his diaper change?
 
2020-08-10 6:03:13 PM  
2 votes:
Thats the only "sir" story I believe
 
2020-08-10 6:01:04 PM  
2 votes:

kling_klang_bed: raerae1980: Skeleton Man: I know how these threads go so here's something to liven the mood and remind you of what's really important: titties.

[thechive.com image 400x690]

[thechive.com image 400x600]

[thechive.com image 400x500]

Now post some hot guys for balance.

Some Rick Moranis for the ladies.

[Fark user image 850x566]

https://thehardtimes.net/blog/rick-mor​anis-is-back-and-hes-here-to-fark/


I appreciate the gesture ;-P
 
2020-08-10 5:59:12 PM  
2 votes:
Blah blah blah, my name's Trump, I'm the fattest and the dumbest.  Here's a truckload of lies.  Go fark yourselves.
 
2020-08-10 5:57:49 PM  
2 votes:
Back to the bunker!
 
2020-08-10 5:56:49 PM  
2 votes:

I hereby demand that I be given a Fark account: thehobbes: Shots fired near the White House.

Are you guessing or reporting?


Reporting- John Roberts of Fox said so.
 
2020-08-10 5:55:41 PM  
2 votes:
So... should everyone on Earth should be calling their loved ones and saying goodbye now?
 
2020-08-10 5:50:08 PM  
2 votes:
He's going to announce the Trump Organization will be in charge of distributing the next round of Covid relief.
 
2020-08-10 5:50:01 PM  
2 votes:
Damn, I was hoping for NFL thread.
 
2020-08-10 5:49:47 PM  
2 votes:
Oh no, DEAD PEOPLE ARE GOING TO VOTE.
 
2020-08-10 5:48:18 PM  
2 votes:

NeoCortex42: pueblonative: Gestalt: Let's see if someone from the media asks him what he means by "take care of Iran." Or does anything to hold him to account for his vague statement of intent.

Just ask him the difference between an appropriations law and an EO.

Ask him how a bill becomes a law.


Ask him about PLAH-sma.
 
2020-08-10 5:45:22 PM  
2 votes:

Jesterling: [Fark user image 497x447]


2021 Prediction Time

1. Constitutional crisis
2. Con-con
3. EMP
4. Sus. Hae.C
5. Canadia-Russia take Control.

Drink
 
2020-08-10 5:44:37 PM  
2 votes:

slaur: Second verse, same as the first, a little bit louder and a little bit worse.....................


🎶  🎶 "NOOO00000ooo matter how young a prune might be, he's always full of wrinkles." 🎶 🎶
 
2020-08-10 5:43:29 PM  
2 votes:

iToad: lincoln65: These are still going? I thought he would have cancelled them again already once the reporter's figure out you can ask two questions.

... and OANN gets to ask one of them.


Newsmax the other.
 
2020-08-10 5:40:46 PM  
2 votes:

b0rg9: He's gonna miss his golf bro's in the audience.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 5:40:03 PM  
2 votes:

undercurrent: Someone have a bingo card to share? If you're making one can I suggest adding the following:

- mail-in ballots
- Gyna virus
- Chicago looting
- Florida / Arizona / Texas cases going down


- Infrastructure week
 
2020-08-10 5:35:10 PM  
2 votes:
Someone have a bingo card to share? If you're making one can I suggest adding the following:

- mail-in ballots
- Gyna virus
- Chicago looting
- Florida / Arizona / Texas cases going down

K. THX
 
2020-08-10 5:30:11 PM  
2 votes:
Happy March 163rd, everyone.

Fark user imageView Full Size


/ it'll go away in January
// it'll just go away
/// if you vote -- some of you can today
 
2020-08-10 5:21:01 PM  
2 votes:
I wonder if he'll even take questions.
 
2020-08-10 8:07:13 PM  
1 vote:

Hand Banana: Today I learned the 1917 pandemic probably stopped the second world war. Thanks professor Trump!


Obama and his time machine strikes again!
 
2020-08-10 7:05:18 PM  
1 vote:

nyclon: Dancis_Frake: I like how he mentioned the "Obama campaign" despite the fact he was running against Clinton.

Couldn't even get a softball right, no wonder he didn't pitch at that Yankees match.

I sense a European--


Your senses are acute.
 
2020-08-10 6:57:07 PM  
1 vote:

blondambition: chucknasty: SurelyShirley: chucknasty: mail in ballots are fraud. ok. OR and WA have been doing only mail in for a while. seems like we figured it out.

...and you know which way they vote, don't you?

yep. it is very nice knowing more than half your neighbors have a clue.

Here in WA we've had mail in voting for so long all I remember about going to the polls is picking my kid up after elementary school and bringing him with me, he's 34 now.


For everyone's sake, I hope he's a teacher there.
 
2020-08-10 6:55:22 PM  
1 vote:

RainDawg: SurelyShirley: chucknasty: mail in ballots are fraud. ok. OR and WA have been doing only mail in for a while. seems like we figured it out.

...and you know which way they vote, don't you?

With a black pen usually, why?


Black pens matter!

/Mrs Shirley votes with a blue pen, but that's just a coincidence.
 
2020-08-10 6:52:38 PM  
1 vote:

OldRod: peter21: Will Trump mention the very fine people on both sides if he accepts the nomination at Gettysburg? Does he even know who fought at Gettysburg?

Estelle Getty?


Golden Toilet, golden drapes, Golden Girl...
 
2020-08-10 6:52:36 PM  
1 vote:
If Obama had done even half of this, OANN would be calling for his head on a pike for politicizing press briefings.
 
2020-08-10 6:52:35 PM  
1 vote:

Elliot8654: He is gonna lie like a crazy man and walk away. Just watch.


To be fair that sums up most of his Presidency.
 
2020-08-10 6:51:07 PM  
1 vote:
OBAMAGATE! You know what he did!
 
2020-08-10 6:47:46 PM  
1 vote:
How does this motherf*cker get away with lying about everything like this? I mean, everything. Everything he says is literally a lie.
 
2020-08-10 6:46:23 PM  
1 vote:

chucknasty: mail in ballots are fraud. ok. OR and WA have been doing only mail in for a while. seems like we figured it out.


Oh, look at the Kool-Aid Man over here, busting through the wall, trying to get us to drink.
 
2020-08-10 6:46:22 PM  
1 vote:
Is this more insane than usual? Because this seems more insane than usual.
 
2020-08-10 6:45:36 PM  
1 vote:
You turned off more than just Europe, pal.
 
2020-08-10 6:43:26 PM  
1 vote:
Gosh, I'm sorry.  Your Post Office is no longer able to handle the Gettysburg address; much too overwhelming.  Probably dangerous.  Maybe ripe for corruption.  We'll have to cancel that.
 
2020-08-10 6:42:36 PM  
1 vote:

liltingbanshee: He looks like he's going to fall asleep any minute.


He's having trouble keeping his greasy eyeball hammocks apart.
 
2020-08-10 6:42:09 PM  
1 vote:

Shani: I like how Trump managed to rock both The Dry Look and The Wet Look at the same time.


It's kind of a "moist" look...

You're welcome!
 
2020-08-10 6:41:07 PM  
1 vote:
I like how Trump managed to rock both The Dry Look and The Wet Look at the same time.
 
2020-08-10 6:40:16 PM  
1 vote:

King Something: Other countries will "own" America if Biden wins


It's "pwn" like them gamer kids say.
 
2020-08-10 6:39:09 PM  
1 vote:

No Line For Beer: Reverend J: You can't have it at the White House dumbass.

He can.

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/trump-de​l​iver-republican-convention-speech-whit​e-house-legal/

The Hatch Act forbids the use of government buildings and employees for campaign activities, with few exceptions. While the president and vice president are exempt, any White House or government employee who helps facilitate campaign activity risks breaking federal law.

Technically he can, but he has to do everything himself, which is never going to happen.
 
2020-08-10 6:38:15 PM  
1 vote:
LIBERATE SMOKEBOMB!
 
2020-08-10 6:38:04 PM  
1 vote:

jayphat: He does know the Confederacy lost at Gettysburg, right?


Dude! Lincoln was a Republican. So is he so it totes fits.
 
2020-08-10 6:37:40 PM  
1 vote:
He looks pissed that someone is asking Mnuchin questions
 
2020-08-10 6:37:16 PM  
1 vote:
He has no idea what China is doing.
 
2020-08-10 6:36:29 PM  
1 vote:
Claiming that China wasn't hit by the coronavirus
 
2020-08-10 6:36:28 PM  
1 vote:
That was probably the softest softball I have seen lobbed....

"I chose Gettysburg because it is where Lincoln, the second greatest Republican president, gave a wonderful speech that uplifted all Americans.  I, the greatest American President, plan on doing the same thing."

I'm not even a politician.
 
2020-08-10 6:35:26 PM  
1 vote:
Less people died at Gettyzzzzzzzzberg than from Rona?
 
2020-08-10 6:35:10 PM  
1 vote:
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 6:34:23 PM  
1 vote:

OldRod: OMG, Trump was up at 8:00 in the morning, actually doing something?


That golden toilet in the White House ain't gonna upper-deck itself.
 
2020-08-10 6:34:06 PM  
1 vote:

neeNHA: How about an EO mandating the force of gravity worldwide?


Hey!  We obey the laws of physics in this country!
 
2020-08-10 6:32:13 PM  
1 vote:
G7..? Which of the G8 is he trying to exclude?
 
2020-08-10 6:32:03 PM  
1 vote:

Corona Cure: 100% Republicans have pre-existing conditions?

Got it.


That's one way to describe him.
 
2020-08-10 6:31:54 PM  
1 vote:
"Pre-existing conditions will be taken care of"

Then why is Bill Barr in court trying to end it?
 
2020-08-10 6:31:44 PM  
1 vote:
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 6:31:18 PM  
1 vote:
I've seen palmetto bugs flailing around after eating on a roach tab behaving more eloquently.
 
2020-08-10 6:30:30 PM  
1 vote:
Further left in terms of religion?

When the fark did Sanders and Joe say anything about religion in their policy statements???

Frankly, though, any WASP would think a policy plan made by an Irish Catholic and a Jewish New Yorker would be considered a Communist Opus. BUt that's not the same as being "left on religion."
 
2020-08-10 6:30:19 PM  
1 vote:
you pay to not have to pay, to have to pay, to pay for not paying to have to pay for.  ugh, my reset button just fired
 
2020-08-10 6:28:43 PM  
1 vote:
After all that hard work his staff did trying to explain that he didn't really mean he wanted to get rid of the payroll tax on the Sunday shows yesterday. Oh well.
 
2020-08-10 6:28:16 PM  
1 vote:
Dems have a "manifesto" now?

Also, would a man deeply religious, like Trump, raw-dog porn stars?
 
2020-08-10 6:27:44 PM  
1 vote:

OldRod: 97,000 children tested positive, does that give you any pause?

"No"

FU!


I believe him.
 
2020-08-10 6:24:12 PM  
1 vote:
2 weeks... where have we heard this before?
 
2020-08-10 6:20:45 PM  
1 vote:
"We're very angry about it", he says with a dry monotone voice, devoid of emotion
 
2020-08-10 6:20:32 PM  
1 vote:

JRoo: Every Trump announcement to America=
[memegenerator.net image 400x400]


The Frantics - Boot to the Head - 17. Boot to the Head
Youtube ZljpTx_tJ78
 
2020-08-10 6:19:18 PM  
1 vote:
One hundred and EIGHTY EIGHT countries
 
2020-08-10 6:19:05 PM  
1 vote:

NeoCortex42: EighthDay: I'm not going to watch chaos goblin

Adderall or downers day?

Why not both?


It's what I call "riding the snake"
 
2020-08-10 6:16:33 PM  
1 vote:
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 6:15:47 PM  
1 vote:
One death is too much

166K
 
2020-08-10 6:14:57 PM  
1 vote:
did this idiot just say reducing capital gains taxes would create jobs???? wow.
 
2020-08-10 6:13:30 PM  
1 vote:

moulderx1: jayphat: So, we got
-China Virus
-capital gains tax cut
-payroll tax cut

Anyone got a bingo yet?

More testing is why we have the most cases.
BINGO
Hold your cards....


Border Wall. If you didn't have it before......
 
2020-08-10 6:13:15 PM  
1 vote:
Last week it was 266 miles. Sat is was 277. Now it is 288? I think I heard that number.
 
2020-08-10 6:12:24 PM  
1 vote:
Poor Jennifer. Being randomly named by Trump in mid-sentence on tv is as embarrassing as when your dad is drunk off his ass and giving a speech at a wedding and mentions your most embarrassing childhood moment in front of all your brand new cousins.
 
2020-08-10 6:11:20 PM  
1 vote:

AAAAGGGGHHHH: ♬  When danger reared it's ugly head, Trump bravely turned his tail and fled... ♬


Can't fault him on this one. Secret Service just being cautious.

Curious if the person they shot was armed.
 
2020-08-10 6:10:06 PM  
1 vote:
Car companies are now making vaccines and space force will expand by 30% before the end of the year. Tremendous progress with ALL OF THE THINGS!
 
2020-08-10 6:09:37 PM  
1 vote:
...and he's back on stage picking up where he thought he left off.

Did he mention Chicago yet? You know...they had a derecho and all.
 
2020-08-10 6:09:21 PM  
1 vote:
The things we announce on Saturday that I don't remember.

Keep attacking Biden on his mental state. It's a winner for me
 
2020-08-10 6:09:21 PM  
1 vote:
Cap gains tax cut......swoon.
 
2020-08-10 6:09:15 PM  
1 vote:
Resolvement?
 
2020-08-10 6:08:26 PM  
1 vote:

WMCB: https://youtu.be/4z7An4eb7xE


thank you!

HAHA the third quarter numbers will be announced jut before Nov 3rd and it will be great. Like the already know what the number will be.
 
2020-08-10 6:06:54 PM  
1 vote:
Hot mike... Huh. He remembered what we were talking about.
 
2020-08-10 6:06:26 PM  
1 vote:

thehobbes: Shooting at 1608, so within a block or so. Officer dropped someone.


So Trump is so far off his meds today, that the SS went to Distraction DefCon 5.
 
2020-08-10 6:06:23 PM  
1 vote:
I have a meeting, you kids keep it real
 
2020-08-10 6:06:04 PM  
1 vote:

thehobbes: Lol. "World is a dangerous place"

he's the most protected person on the planet.


By tonight, he'll claim the shooter was coming for him but his super awesome mind detected it minutes before the shooter could do it.

This has nothing to do with him passing out in his chair with a half-eaten Big Mac watching Minority Report last night.
 
2020-08-10 6:05:25 PM  
1 vote:
the Youtube link still says "livestream  ended."

:(
 
2020-08-10 6:03:09 PM  
1 vote:
White House staff have insisted on toilet training.
 
2020-08-10 6:02:03 PM  
1 vote:
He is super slow today..like tired, bored slow talking.
 
2020-08-10 6:01:34 PM  
1 vote:
Called it. Fence jumper.
 
2020-08-10 6:00:05 PM  
1 vote:
Staged to make him look like a big tough guy for coming back in?
 
2020-08-10 5:59:58 PM  
1 vote:

Bit'O'Gristle: Secret Service ran him out of the room....what is going on?


He went off the rails within five minutes
 
2020-08-10 5:58:42 PM  
1 vote:
Aren't there several layers of fence barriers erected in front of the WH right now?
 
2020-08-10 5:55:58 PM  
1 vote:
Leaky diaper?
 
2020-08-10 5:54:13 PM  
1 vote:
Daddy Putin must have called, Reek doesn't keep him waiting.....
 
2020-08-10 5:53:43 PM  
1 vote:
Paging Billy Squire to the white courtesy phone.  Billy Squire.

(one could hope)
 
2020-08-10 5:52:35 PM  
1 vote:
My outboard liver is connected and ready.

/gonna need it.
 
2020-08-10 5:51:30 PM  
1 vote:
I'll just add that as a Phoenician a team which regularly snatches defeat from the jaws of victory prepared me for a life ruled by conservative nut jobs during a post apocalyptic hellscape.
 
2020-08-10 5:51:16 PM  
1 vote:
He's high as f*ck,
 
2020-08-10 5:50:57 PM  
1 vote:
[$getcountry_name] Virus
 
2020-08-10 5:50:47 PM  
1 vote:
This guy is the worst public speaker ever.
 
2020-08-10 5:47:30 PM  
1 vote:
Did he invite his golf buddies peanut gallery for that cheer fix?
 
2020-08-10 5:46:57 PM  
1 vote:

cameroncrazy1984: Is this a Trump presser thread or an NFL Sunday thread?


Yes.
 
2020-08-10 5:44:47 PM  
1 vote:
"We're doing so great with the COVID-19TM, nobody could believe how great we're doing. I want college football, you want college football, let's college football. Also, I'm directing funds from Wall to go towards chiseling a beautiful taco bowl into the side of Mt. Rushmore. Thank you everybody. Thhhhhhhhhhhank you."
 
2020-08-10 5:41:44 PM  
1 vote:
Circus Music
Youtube pct1uEhAqBQ
 
2020-08-10 5:38:31 PM  
1 vote:

Gestalt: Let's see if someone from the media asks him what he means by "take care of Iran." Or does anything to hold him to account for his vague statement of intent.


He means moving the dossier from the "In" pile on his desk to the "Out" pile of his desk, without reading it.
 
2020-08-10 5:35:07 PM  
1 vote:
A trump thread you say? 
media2.giphy.comView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 5:33:23 PM  
1 vote:
Each one of these events is worse than the last. He could be doing some good with these, but it's all lies, manipulation and magical thinking.

I never thought I'd say the greatest threat to the country is the President, but here we are.
 
2020-08-10 5:33:20 PM  
1 vote:
Let's see if someone from the media asks him what he means by "take care of Iran." Or does anything to hold him to account for his vague statement of intent.
 
2020-08-10 5:31:33 PM  
1 vote:
Stop watching this crap and they may stop showing it.

/who am I kidding
 
2020-08-10 5:29:29 PM  
1 vote:
I have not had a drink in quite a while.  This is no time to start.

/crawls back under bed
 
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