Skip to content
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(CNN Philippines)   When talking about Covid19 WHO official says "we can outsmart the virus". Difficulty: Half of Americans can't outsmart themselves out of a wet paper bag let alone follow simple safety guidelines   (cnnphilippines.com) divider line
    More: Unlikely, World Health Organization, Infection, Individual, Virus, Individual rights, AIDS, Dr. Mike Ryan, Maria Van Kerkhove  
•       •       •

1014 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Aug 2020 at 2:35 PM (11 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



Voting Results (Smartest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

 
2020-08-10 2:11:22 PM  
14 votes:
It's not even a living organism and it outsmarted Trump.
 
2020-08-10 2:42:19 PM  
9 votes:
A coronavirus doesn't have a brain. A human is therefore infinitely more intelligent and therefore infinitely more capable.

If we use that capability to combat coronavirus, we can't lose. If we instead use that capability to combat the other humans combating the virus, we can't win.

It's pretty obvious which tack a large number of Americans have chosen to take...
 
2020-08-10 3:01:07 PM  
6 votes:

rjakobi: When we're referring to "most Americans", are we referring to ourselves in a self-depreciating manner or are we just pointing at the others in our nation we don't like?  I only say this because I've always considered myself very smart and really don't think it's fair that I end up getting grouped with the slower idiots whenever people on this site make wide sweeping gestures upon what they think is reality or not.

I mean, if we're laughing at ourselves, sure, go ahead.  If we're laughing with ourselves at other people, then that's just nice at all.


We're not laughing at or with. It's gallows humor. We're sadly accepting the fact that a huge number of us are going to bring the rest of us down with them, as they've been trying to do since the foundation of our country.
 
2020-08-10 2:46:17 PM  
4 votes:
Every traditional philosophy which relies on 'rational self-interest' is no longer valid in America, since now a third or so of Americans only act in irrational self-destruction.

That's why you find rednecks in trailers living off disability, who are absolutely adamant that the estate tax be entirely repealed. It's why you see poor people voting against any taxation of billionaires and against any kind of universal health system.

It's opposite world.
 
2020-08-10 2:41:03 PM  
4 votes:
Just tell us to do the exact opposite of what we should be doing. For example, tell people that they have to go out and socialize and not wear masks. The smart people who get it will ignore the order and stay home and wear masks, but all the COVIDiots will be like, "You can't tell me what to do! I have my rights! I am going to stay home and wear a mask!" Sure, some people will follow the new directive, but the number that do will be a hell of a lot less than the number of COVIDiots who will do the exact opposite.

:-D
 
2020-08-10 2:39:31 PM  
4 votes:
No. No we cannot.
USA Americans need maps and flashlights to find their anuses.
 
2020-08-10 5:02:19 PM  
3 votes:
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 2:58:15 PM  
3 votes:
When we're referring to "most Americans", are we referring to ourselves in a self-depreciating manner or are we just pointing at the others in our nation we don't like?  I only say this because I've always considered myself very smart and really don't think it's fair that I end up getting grouped with the slower idiots whenever people on this site make wide sweeping gestures upon what they think is reality or not.

I mean, if we're laughing at ourselves, sure, go ahead.  If we're laughing with ourselves at other people, then that's just nice at all.
 
2020-08-10 2:54:47 PM  
3 votes:

Subtonic: As a sovereign citizen, I do not recognize the authority of the Corona virus, and will therefore not be wearing a mask. Now excuse me, I'm off to Golden Corral.


I loved Golden Corral as a kid.

When I had kids, I took them to Golden Corral since I remembered liking it at their age.

Seeing it through adult eyes....the people! the things!
 
2020-08-10 3:18:00 PM  
2 votes:

AmbassadorBooze: Subtonic: AmbassadorBooze: For too long we let the dumb breed.  We need to revive Eugenics.  But we just get rid of the racial part of it.  Instead we collectivise it.  Only let those who have traits we need breed.  Do we need strong workers?  If so have the strongest males all jack off into a giant tank, and then the strongest females take a 100cc random sample from the tank and blast that baby batter up into the baby maker.  Do we need smart people?  Do a similar thing.  Of course our strong worker offspring will need the proper nutrition etc... to become the workers we need, but we collectivise that too.  And our scientist offspring will need the proper education to make sure their genes get maximum effect.  And to make everything more equitable, we can even make sure that the race ratios in each tank are the "correct" ones that will produce equity.  And we make laws that forcibly abort any unauthorized gamete joining.  It isn't a person, just a mass of cells.  Make the gamete joiners eat the mass of cells.

Stupid people problem solved.

I was wondering how you'd fit cannibalism into that...

Is it cannibalism if it is not a person?  Is it cannibalism if I bite my tounge and some blood gets swallowed?  Or I guess the mass of cells isn't a part of either gamete donator.  So it would be similar to someone swallowing another person's jizz.  Is it cannibalism to swallow the jizz of another person?


You've uh... given me a lot to think about.
 
2020-08-10 3:09:52 PM  
2 votes:

AmbassadorBooze: For too long we let the dumb breed.  We need to revive Eugenics.  But we just get rid of the racial part of it.  Instead we collectivise it.  Only let those who have traits we need breed.  Do we need strong workers?  If so have the strongest males all jack off into a giant tank, and then the strongest females take a 100cc random sample from the tank and blast that baby batter up into the baby maker.  Do we need smart people?  Do a similar thing.  Of course our strong worker offspring will need the proper nutrition etc... to become the workers we need, but we collectivise that too.  And our scientist offspring will need the proper education to make sure their genes get maximum effect.  And to make everything more equitable, we can even make sure that the race ratios in each tank are the "correct" ones that will produce equity.  And we make laws that forcibly abort any unauthorized gamete joining.  It isn't a person, just a mass of cells.  Make the gamete joiners eat the mass of cells.

Stupid people problem solved.


Do you want Khan? Because that's how you get Khan.
 
2020-08-10 3:08:32 PM  
2 votes:

AmbassadorBooze: For too long we let the dumb breed.  We need to revive Eugenics.  But we just get rid of the racial part of it.  Instead we collectivise it.  Only let those who have traits we need breed.  Do we need strong workers?  If so have the strongest males all jack off into a giant tank, and then the strongest females take a 100cc random sample from the tank and blast that baby batter up into the baby maker.  Do we need smart people?  Do a similar thing.  Of course our strong worker offspring will need the proper nutrition etc... to become the workers we need, but we collectivise that too.  And our scientist offspring will need the proper education to make sure their genes get maximum effect.  And to make everything more equitable, we can even make sure that the race ratios in each tank are the "correct" ones that will produce equity.  And we make laws that forcibly abort any unauthorized gamete joining.  It isn't a person, just a mass of cells.  Make the gamete joiners eat the mass of cells.

Stupid people problem solved.


I was wondering how you'd fit cannibalism into that...
 
2020-08-10 2:56:48 PM  
2 votes:

Raoul Eaton: This is like saying we can outsmart an F5 tornado.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 2:43:06 PM  
2 votes:

HotIgneous Intruder: No. No we cannot.
USA Americans need maps and flashlights to find their anuses.


Can is a very fungible word.

I CAN rent a luxury jet and fly around the world.

Is it likely? No. is it feasible? No. Will I be ruined doing it? Yes.

So we CAN do it, we just won't succeed.
 
2020-08-10 3:07:28 PM  
1 vote:
Why do we try to turn ailments into sentient villains? My chronic flatulence is a brainless cloud of noxious gas - not some black-garbed nemesis hellbent on power - AND WON'T ANYONE CONSIDER THE FEELS OF WET PAPER BAGS??
 
2020-08-10 2:55:37 PM  
1 vote:

Subtonic: As a sovereign citizen, I do not recognize the authority of the Corona virus, and will therefore not be wearing a mask. Now excuse me, I'm off to Golden Corral.


I dipped my balls in the chocolate fountain so take that as you will.
 
2020-08-10 2:54:45 PM  
1 vote:
Can't.  We're too busy checkmating libs!!!
 
2020-08-10 2:54:00 PM  
1 vote:

Resident Muslim: SVC_conservative: HotIgneous Intruder: No. No we cannot.
USA Americans need maps and flashlights to find their anuses.

Can is a very fungible word.

I CAN rent a luxury jet and fly around the world.

Is it likely? No. is it feasible? No. Will I be ruined doing it? Yes.

So we CAN do it, we just won't succeed.

Way to humblebrag.

/still, I'm impressed


I've had a bad day, the sale of my old home just abruptly terminated due to my HOA, so fleeing the country is top on my mind right now instead of paying 2 mortgages.
 
2020-08-10 2:47:55 PM  
1 vote:
This is like saying we can outsmart an F5 tornado.
 
2020-08-10 2:38:08 PM  
1 vote:
We have the biggest educated people.  The best.  People tell me all the times, lots of people. Lots of education in the US.
 
Displayed 20 of 20 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking





On Twitter



  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.