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(Cracked)   Predictions are Christmas 2020 will be like the rest of the year - AKA a flaming train wreck. Something to humbug about while you sip eggnog   (cracked.com) divider line
    More: Obvious, Christmas, Christmas and holiday season, Christmas controversy, own childhood memories, Tucker Carlson, own elderly Trump-loving parents, Happy holidays, Black Friday  
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414 clicks; posted to Discussion » on 10 Aug 2020 at 11:35 AM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2020-08-10 10:11:34 AM  
i.pinimg.comView Full Size
 
2020-08-10 10:19:02 AM  
Please don't tease me with the prospect of having to socially distance myself from extended family over Christmas, because I can't handle the let down if holiday gatherings are okay again.
 
2020-08-10 10:27:59 AM  
[unwraps small box]

Fark user imageView Full Size


*gasp*  You shouldn't have!  It's just what I wanted.
 
2020-08-10 10:31:38 AM  
Now imagine Tucker cuts to a clip of a weeping woman, saying she was just told they were cancelling their city's annual Christmas tree lighting ceremony ("My grandmother is devastated! This could be her last Christmas!"), a clip that is run side-by-side with footage of the massive BLM protests from the summer. "So the left says this is okay to do during this supposed deadly pandemic, but Christians can't celebrate Christ's birthday?" Tucker will say. "We all know the real agenda here."

Nothing David Wong says here is wrong - it's probably gonna be a total shiatshow - but getting stressing about it this far out is not helpful. You're gonna burn yourself out.

Focus on the things you can control. Start slowly buying what you might need if we have to do lockdowns again. Campaign for local candidates and do work with GOTV efforts. If you want to think about Christmas, maybe let this be the year when you start buying thoughtful presents four months early.

Because if I'm reading the 2020 disaster advent calendar correctly, we've got about a 90% chance of either an alien invasion, asteroid hit, or Kaiju attack before Christmas, in which case you've wasted precious days of your remaining life getting mad at Tucker Carlson for being an anthropomorphic colon polyp, and that's a real shame.
 
2020-08-10 11:18:18 AM  
Predictions are Christmas?
 
2020-08-10 12:21:57 PM  
1. The Economy Will Be Absolutely Desperate For Holiday CashSo you're saying there will be deals to be had?
 
2020-08-10 12:37:57 PM  
"BUT THAT'S WHAT WE ALWAYS DO!!!"

Says area man,

March, 2020
April, 2020
May, 2020
June, 2020
July, 2020
August, 2020
 
2020-08-10 1:21:37 PM  
We did a Google Hangout yesterday with the kids and it's depressing to think that we won't be seeing our son for months and months. He's in deepest, derpiest Florida. Thanksgiving is all but written off and, absent a vaccine or radical mutation, Christmas is probably gone too. So, count me among those wishing for a Merry Vaccine. The sooner the better.
 
2020-08-10 1:27:47 PM  

Martian_Astronomer: Now imagine Tucker cuts to a clip of a weeping woman, saying she was just told they were cancelling their city's annual Christmas tree lighting ceremony ("My grandmother is devastated! This could be her last Christmas!"), a clip that is run side-by-side with footage of the massive BLM protests from the summer. "So the left says this is okay to do during this supposed deadly pandemic, but Christians can't celebrate Christ's birthday?" Tucker will say. "We all know the real agenda here."

Nothing David Wong says here is wrong - it's probably gonna be a total shiatshow - but getting stressing about it this far out is not helpful. You're gonna burn yourself out.

Focus on the things you can control. Start slowly buying what you might need if we have to do lockdowns again. Campaign for local candidates and do work with GOTV efforts. If you want to think about Christmas, maybe let this be the year when you start buying thoughtful presents four months early.

Because if I'm reading the 2020 disaster advent calendar correctly, we've got about a 90% chance of either an alien invasion, asteroid hit, or Kaiju attack before Christmas, in which case you've wasted precious days of your remaining life getting mad at Tucker Carlson for being an anthropomorphic colon polyp, and that's a real shame.


It probably won't really matter, but to some extent, perhaps Wong predicting it will make it harder to pull off. He's eaten their lunch by calling them out on it in advance, and they'd look cynical, disingenuous, and predictable if they did it anyway. Anyone can say "Ha! Farking conservative talking heads are so predictable that Cracked called exactly this months ago!"

That said, a) Cracked doesn't even have the limited reach that it once did, much less with Fox News viewers (Cracked did an article on how much of a dickwad Trump was in like 2014, when they were just barely past their peak, and didn't stop shiat even then) and b) Trump supporters aren't even swayed by things like facts, basic logic, or their own words from two months ago, so I doubt this would stop them.

Point is, this article eats their lunch a little. Maybe to the extent of sneaking into the RNC and eating a single meal from the buffet, but I think it merits a mention.
 
2020-08-10 2:00:15 PM  
It shall be a 'homespun' Christmas - reverting back to family gatherings rather than rampant consumerism.
Lots of baking, homemade ornaments & a sh*t-ton of passive-aggression around the dinner table.
 
2020-08-10 2:19:06 PM  
TLDR: right wingers are shiatty people that want to shovel you and your entire family into the ovens for their stonks and jesus feels.
 
2020-08-10 3:03:23 PM  

Diogenes: [unwraps small box]

*gasp*  You shouldn't have!  It's just what I wanted.


So easily pleased.
 
2020-08-10 3:10:38 PM  

Martian_Astronomer: Nothing David Wong says here is wrong - it's probably gonna be a total shiatshow - but getting stressing about it this far out is not helpful. You're gonna burn yourself out.


This.  And who knows, we might get lucky and Tucker will be dead by then.
 
2020-08-10 4:35:01 PM  
i really hope Black friday is a bust for in person sales this year and online sales take off in a huge way.    Thjat said i just do not see it happening.

Good luck trying to enforce social distancing when dealing with 100 people after 25 $99 40" flat screen tvs.
 
2020-08-10 5:30:52 PM  
Great. We'll get the "Jesus will protect us during this holiest of holidays" crowd.
There's no virus during Christmas!
 
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