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(Fark)   "I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done." -Steven Wright. Yeah, but the real trick is getting them all in the right order. This is your Fark Writer's Thread, numbers edition   (fark.com) divider line
    More: CSB, next step, Meantime, Cascading Style Sheets, Andrew Cuomo, Fark Writer's Thread, Politics, year's Fark Fiction Anthology, Sports  
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65 clicks; posted to Discussion » and Main » on 05 Aug 2020 at 5:15 PM (7 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2020-08-05 3:51:59 PM  
Submissions have closed for this year's Fark Fiction Anthology, and boy did they all come in at the last minute!  Literally, one came in with three minutes to space.  Not like I was standing there with a stopwatch or anything, but you gotta respect the effort.  You can see in our handy-dandy chart how it came out this year:

Fark user imageView Full Size


We ended up with 56 submissions and over 185K words for the editors to read through.  So that'll be our next step: we'll be spending the next few weeks going through everything, and then put together a list of the ones we like best, and move on from there.  Progress!

In the meantime, if you submitted an entry and have not heard back from me that we have it, please let me know!  Everyone should have been replied to by now (there's one person who's email keeps bouncing, but I'm trying again now) and if you haven't, let's make sure I didn't let anything fall through the cracks.

Thanks again for another great year of submissions!
 
2020-08-05 6:33:53 PM  
Awesome. Can't wait to see what everyone came up with. We have some talented writers here on Fark.
 
2020-08-05 6:50:38 PM  
Help me, trans farkers, you're my only hope!

I'm going to keep asking until I find someone or I run out of time before publishing, but I have an installment coming up that is the personal story of a trans ex-ballet dancer. I have done as best I can researching what it's like to grow up trans and come out to your family, but I am not actually a trans person and it's possible I've gotten some shiat very wrong. I'm also not a ballerina, but I care slightly less about getting the ballet wrong. (But if anyone wants to help me out with that, that's cool too.)

I put the writing I need help with in this Google Doc with comment mode enabled. If anyone wants to give it a look and tell me what I've messed up about trans-ness or ballet, please do. I will credit you under your name or an alias of your choice and you can have some TotalFark if you want it - just let me know who you are here so I can give it to you!

If you want to tell me gender identity isn't real or whatever nonsense, I don't need you, you will get nothing, and the only thing you will accomplish is annoying me briefly, but if that's the sort of person you are I can't help you.
 
2020-08-05 9:36:49 PM  
Been working on my Sci-fi story, maybe next year.
 
2020-08-05 9:46:36 PM  

Billy Bathsalt: Been working on my Sci-fi story, maybe next year.


Get a headscarf on next year's.
Head start. Autocucumber can be hilarious.

There have been a few years when the deadline came and went, and I hadn't even started an outline.

This year's submission made it in just under the deadline, and I've been rewriting it since March. I planned on submitting by the end of June, and other stuff came up.

And my submission this year is a rewrite of some "flash fiction" I submitted a couple years ago, but all the reviewers said it lacked a real ending. So I missed the deadline two years in a row, unable to finish an ending for a 1000-word story.

I'm not suggesting that you are a slacker like I am, just encouraging you not to be.
 
2020-08-06 12:01:25 AM  
I admire people that can finish a story. I guess I'm a bit of a failed writer. I can come up with an idea, and start moving things forward, flesh out the players and, come up with the "Big Problem" and then I never can figure out how to head toward a conclusion. I'm always too busy weighing ideas against each other. I almost always finish poems but never really ever finish a story. At least I can do a beginning.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
 
2020-08-06 12:35:41 AM  

OK So Amuse Me: I admire people that can finish a story. I guess I'm a bit of a failed writer. I can come up with an idea, and start moving things forward, flesh out the players and, come up with the "Big Problem" and then I never can figure out how to head toward a conclusion. I'm always too busy weighing ideas against each other. I almost always finish poems but never really ever finish a story. At least I can do a beginning.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯


Sounds like more of a mental block. And every time you fail to get to the ending, you're reinforcing it.

Let me see if I can crank out a couple of fun endings for you. Reverse-prompts. Pick one and write the beginning. And then maybe try writing an ending (a way better ending!) yourself and coming up with the beginning.

1. "Bob," she said. "Why didn't you just tell me how you felt right from the beginning?"

"Because I was just so afraid of what you'd say," he replied, looking down. "So what's your answer?"

She kicked him in the shin. "That's for being an asshole!" Then she smiled. "Now come on, we've got a lot of work to do!"

He laughed and followed her, limping.

2. The vial fell off the counter. A gauzy green vapor emerged and evaporated. The bacteria in the petri dish gave a faint but audible cheer.

Alice drew a raygun out of her lab coat pocket. "Okay, well, now we have a new problem," she said.

3. "It was me the whole time!" cried the cat. It was wreathed in a dangerous red glow and floating three feet off off the sofa. "I have controlled your every motion! I have anticipated your every thought! I have created and destroyed entire universes just to bring you to this very place at this very time! I am omnipotent!"

"What do you want from me?" John said.

"My ear itches and I can't reach!" said the cat. It leapt lightly down onto the coffee table and bumped John with its head. "Come on, man. Help a brother out. No. Lower."


...I let myself skip around when I'm having trouble making a story go somewhere, I might write the middle or the end if I have that before the beginning. Maybe writing that way will work better for you.

But as long as you're writing, you're not a failed writer. The only way to learn it is to keep doing it.
 
2020-08-06 1:05:44 AM  

DoBeDoBeLurk: OK So Amuse Me: I admire people that can finish a story. I guess I'm a bit of a failed writer. I can come up with an idea, and start moving things forward, flesh out the players and, come up with the "Big Problem" and then I never can figure out how to head toward a conclusion. I'm always too busy weighing ideas against each other. I almost always finish poems but never really ever finish a story. At least I can do a beginning.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Sounds like more of a mental block. And every time you fail to get to the ending, you're reinforcing it.

Let me see if I can crank out a couple of fun endings for you. Reverse-prompts. Pick one and write the beginning. And then maybe try writing an ending (a way better ending!) yourself and coming up with the beginning.

1. "Bob," she said. "Why didn't you just tell me how you felt right from the beginning?"

"Because I was just so afraid of what you'd say," he replied, looking down. "So what's your answer?"

She kicked him in the shin. "That's for being an asshole!" Then she smiled. "Now come on, we've got a lot of work to do!"

He laughed and followed her, limping.

2. The vial fell off the counter. A gauzy green vapor emerged and evaporated. The bacteria in the petri dish gave a faint but audible cheer.

Alice drew a raygun out of her lab coat pocket. "Okay, well, now we have a new problem," she said.

3. "It was me the whole time!" cried the cat. It was wreathed in a dangerous red glow and floating three feet off off the sofa. "I have controlled your every motion! I have anticipated your every thought! I have created and destroyed entire universes just to bring you to this very place at this very time! I am omnipotent!"

"What do you want from me?" John said.

"My ear itches and I can't reach!" said the cat. It leapt lightly down onto the coffee table and bumped John with its head. "Come on, man. Help a brother out. No. Lower."


...I let myself skip around when I'm having trouble making a story go somewhere, I might write the middle or the end if I have that before the beginning. Maybe writing that way will work better for you.

But as long as you're writing, you're not a failed writer. The only way to learn it is to keep doing it.


I love that third prompt! You should finish that one for real. I've often wondered if the reason I can't finish a story is I just don't have one in me. Not everyone is or can be a story writer. Poetry is easy for me though.
 
2020-08-06 1:55:15 AM  

OK So Amuse Me: I love that third prompt! You should finish that one for real. I've often wondered if the reason I can't finish a story is I just don't have one in me. Not everyone is or can be a story writer. Poetry is easy for me though.


It's okay to pick and choose! Poetry is super hard for a lot of people, so good on you for being able to do it!

Still, it's a matter of liking versus ability. If you don't like it, you don't have to like it. If you don't have the skillset for story writing but would like to have it, the way to get there is to keep trying.

My Tumblr is actually becoming a repository of writing advice because people seem to like that. If you can put up with the politics, I've explained quite a lot of story-writing tools.

Like, I made this for fun:
Fark user imageView Full Size

Fark user imageView Full Size

...it's still up to an individual to use this stuff, though. A hammer can pound in a nail or break your thumb!
 
2020-08-06 6:21:05 AM  
I submitted on the 7/31 and haven't heard anything back. I'm just wondering if the submission link is working for me. I had trouble last year as well.
 
2020-08-06 9:15:13 AM  
The acknowledgement for my submission came through, thanks! It was a mad dash to finish under the wire, for reasons unrelated to fiction. Up until mid July, I was on schedule. There's almost certainly stuff to fix.

OK So Amuse Me: I admire people that can finish a story. I guess I'm a bit of a failed writer. I can come up with an idea, and start moving things forward, flesh out the players and, come up with the "Big Problem" and then I never can figure out how to head toward a conclusion. I'm always too busy weighing ideas against each other. I almost always finish poems but never really ever finish a story. At least I can do a beginning.


I would recommend reading stories by established writers and analyzing the plots. Figure out what they did (or didn't) do to get from A to Z. For instance, if you know ahead of time where Z is, you have a better chance of getting there. Give yourself permission to discard ideas; you can always write another story.
 
2020-08-06 10:01:32 AM  

OK So Amuse Me: I admire people that can finish a story. I guess I'm a bit of a failed writer. I can come up with an idea, and start moving things forward, flesh out the players and, come up with the "Big Problem" and then I never can figure out how to head toward a conclusion. I'm always too busy weighing ideas against each other. I almost always finish poems but never really ever finish a story. At least I can do a beginning.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯


Another option might be to write the story backwards. Start with the ending, then work backwards from there. This works extremely well with detective stories, and allows you to perform all the foreshadowing in any given story type.

My writing style is much less organized. I tend to start with a vignette fully visualized in my mind, then work out why the characters act/react the way they do and how they got to that point. I pencil in a rough conclusion and denouement, and then go backwards and forwards from that original vignette with other scenes as they occur to me. I create plot outlines to keep everything straight. It's sloppy and inefficient, but works for me (for a given value of "works). I've managed to get rejected by lots of publishers, so I have that going for me.

However you manage it, you're not a "failed writer" so long as you keep writing.
 
2020-08-06 10:40:57 AM  

Pop and Miracle Whip: I submitted on the 7/31 and haven't heard anything back. I'm just wondering if the submission link is working for me. I had trouble last year as well.


Send me an email at 'tor­a­qu­e[nospam-﹫-backwards]elibomdi­uqs*c­o­m' (note: you'll have to type that out in your mail program, because Fark won't you cut and paste email addresses) and I'll see if I can track down where it is or what happened.  I can still get you in to the judges this year if you sent it on the 31st.
 
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