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(Slate)   "Dear Stoya: Is it a compliment if men tell me after sex I'm tight? I'm in my 50s and don't know"   (slate.com) divider line
    More: Interesting, Sexual intercourse, Vagina, Masturbation, Human sexual behavior, Human sexuality, Penis, Oral sex, Foreplay  
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513 clicks; posted to Discussion » on 05 Aug 2020 at 8:35 AM (7 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



38 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2020-08-05 8:03:47 AM  
"I also worry that my breasts are too large and supple. Help me!"
 
2020-08-05 8:38:36 AM  
The Sweetest Thing - Penis Song
Youtube yEluYseSodE
 
2020-08-05 8:41:33 AM  
An elderly man goes into confession and says to the priest,

"Father, I'm 80 years old, married, have four kids and eleven healthy grandchildren, and last night I had an affair with two 18 year old girls. I made love with both of them... twice."

The priest said, "Well, my son, when was the last time you were in confession?"

"Never Father... I'm Jewish."

"So then, why are you telling me?"

"I'm telling everybody!"
 
2020-08-05 8:48:48 AM  
If butt stuff was involved, then yes.
 
2020-08-05 8:57:24 AM  

I am Tom Joad's Complete Lack of Surprise: "I also worry that my breasts are too large and supple. Help me!"


Dear Penthouse Stoya...
 
2020-08-05 9:11:08 AM  
"Tight" means your body was into it, Hon. It's always a better dance with a good partner.
 
2020-08-05 9:21:45 AM  
encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.comView Full Size
 
2020-08-05 9:30:18 AM  
No, they are not being very honest with you.
 
2020-08-05 9:32:03 AM  
postavy.czView Full Size

"The answer, my friend, is blowin in the wind..."
 
2020-08-05 9:37:21 AM  

Fano: [postavy.cz image 200x200]
"The answer, my friend, is blowin in the wind..."


Why did you say that twice?
 
2020-08-05 9:41:24 AM  
If you are in your 50's and don't know what that means or why it's important, it's probably because you've not had a whole lot of sex.  Which coincidentally, is why you're tight.
 
2020-08-05 9:42:21 AM  
Conceited man is making love to conceited woman. Between moans, she blurts out, "Yeah, baby, do me! Ride me harder! Aren't I tight?"

The man replies, "No, just full."
 
2020-08-05 9:43:33 AM  

Fano: [postavy.cz image 200x200]
"The answer, my friend, is blowin in the wind..."


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-05 9:44:13 AM  

Another Government Employee: "Tight" means your body was into it, Hon. It's always a better dance with a good partner.


I thought it was the opposite.  Tight means there wasn't enough foreplay to cause the tenting effect.

/I'm only getting this information second hand, what the hell do I know?
 
2020-08-05 9:45:30 AM  

Fear the Clam: [YouTube video: The Sweetest Thing - Penis Song]


That movie is great from start to finish.
 
2020-08-05 9:47:57 AM  
For you, but not for your ex.
 
2020-08-05 9:56:50 AM  
Unavailable for comment

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-05 10:08:51 AM  

iKer_Thwap: Another Government Employee: "Tight" means your body was into it, Hon. It's always a better dance with a good partner.

I thought it was the opposite.  Tight means there wasn't enough foreplay to cause the tenting effect.


Tenting effect?

Small hands. Smells of cabbage.
 
2020-08-05 10:11:14 AM  
Article really buried the lede here. A Farker's girlfriend asks how to manage him in the last story: he masturbates 3 hours a day while on the clock working  from home. Anyone want to step forward and claim your internet fame?
 
2020-08-05 10:11:26 AM  

Another Government Employee: "Tight" means your body was into it, Hon. It's always a better dance with a good partner.


Truth.

If you experience "hotdog in a hallway" that means she's probably not that into you.

Dicks aren't the only thing that engorge.
 
2020-08-05 10:13:34 AM  

Ker_Thwap: Tight means there wasn't enough foreplay to cause the tenting effect.


That's when it fills up with poison gas to kill bugs?
 
2020-08-05 10:22:46 AM  
When those other fellas said you are tight, are you sure they aren't referring to the fact that you never pick up the bill?

cdn.amomama.comView Full Size


Because this is the first time I've heard my rhetorical question echo down a woman's hoo-ha.
 
2020-08-05 10:28:05 AM  
It'll ride down with wear.

//obscure?
 
2020-08-05 10:39:51 AM  
It is a compliment, as every man knows the tighter the vagina the more pleasurable it is.

Since you're doing kegels you are on the right track and why you are getting compliments. However it is only the start of the journey, why settle for being only just being kind of tight? You've already put in some work and it is paying off. At this point should either commit to perfection or give up. Start doing power kegels, and squats and various pelvic exercises for at least 8 hours a day. You know you will have hit the peak when you can put a piece of coal into your vagina and squeeze hard enough to turn that sucker into a diamond.

At that point you will have the perfect vagina. The next man to sleep with you will be grunting away on top of you unaware for a moment, and then you will squeeze those muscles and give his penis a pelvic handshake with the grip of a bear trap and he will scream out in ecstasy and offer you anything just to let him go, but you will not do so, you will hold fast knowing that you have him in a bond tighter than any marriage contract.
 
2020-08-05 10:44:09 AM  
Cheap Trick - She's Tight
Youtube r3J8rg1urHE


/Oblig
 
2020-08-05 10:52:38 AM  
They just meant she was thrifty.
 
2020-08-05 11:05:29 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-05 11:12:45 AM  

scumm: It'll ride down with wear.

//obscure?


"Thank you, Mr. Humphries."
 
2020-08-05 12:28:27 PM  
What, "tight" like "drunk"?

/ never saw the point of context
 
2020-08-05 1:00:09 PM  
I told her "You're too tight and flat!"

She said "Get off my back!"
 
2020-08-05 2:20:36 PM  

durbnpoisn: If you are in your 50's and don't know what that means or why it's important, it's probably because you've not had a whole lot of sex.  Which coincidentally, is why you're tight.


This is the most unmitigated balls, bullshiat and bollocks. It does not work that way.
 
2020-08-05 2:37:09 PM  

blondambition: durbnpoisn: If you are in your 50's and don't know what that means or why it's important, it's probably because you've not had a whole lot of sex.  Which coincidentally, is why you're tight.

This is the most unmitigated balls, bullshiat and bollocks. It does not work that way.


It's an old joke.  It doesn't mean it's true.
 
2020-08-05 3:33:24 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-05 5:01:13 PM  

Can't_Think_Of_A_Name: Article really buried the lede here. A Farker's girlfriend asks how to manage him in the last story: he masturbates 3 hours a day while on the clock working  from home. Anyone want to step forward and claim your internet fame?


Hmm, what's he doing for the other 5? And I'm guessing it's 3 hours of looking at porn, not 3 hours of continuous jacking it.
 
2020-08-05 8:35:49 PM  

BadAdviceGuy: It is a compliment, as every man knows the tighter the vagina the more pleasurable it is.

Since you're doing kegels you are on the right track and why you are getting compliments. However it is only the start of the journey, why settle for being only just being kind of tight? You've already put in some work and it is paying off. At this point should either commit to perfection or give up. Start doing power kegels, and squats and various pelvic exercises for at least 8 hours a day. You know you will have hit the peak when you can put a piece of coal into your vagina and squeeze hard enough to turn that sucker into a diamond.

At that point you will have the perfect vagina. The next man to sleep with you will be grunting away on top of you unaware for a moment, and then you will squeeze those muscles and give his penis a pelvic handshake with the grip of a bear trap and he will scream out in ecstasy and offer you anything just to let him go, but you will not do so, you will hold fast knowing that you have him in a bond tighter than any marriage contract.


Half a dozen provocative squats?
 
2020-08-05 10:07:05 PM  

Can't_Think_Of_A_Name: Article really buried the lede here. A Farker's girlfriend asks how to manage him in the last story: he masturbates 3 hours a day while on the clock working  from home. Anyone want to step forward and claim your internet fame?


If that's a real Farker, they misspelled minutes.

/maybe seconds
 
2020-08-06 5:05:04 PM  
Depends if they say that before or after you pay them
 
2020-08-06 8:15:33 PM  
"Can you take your pantyhose off first next time?"
 
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