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(DeadState)   According to this guy, if you vote for Biden, you have "Sold your soul to the devil"   (deadstate.org) divider line
    More: Ironic, Catholic Church, Roman Catholic Church, Christian terms, Joe Biden, Christianity, Fox Business, host Lou Dobbs, Soul  
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2375 clicks; posted to Politics » on 05 Aug 2020 at 12:30 AM (11 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



174 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2020-08-04 6:11:17 PM  
I didn't sell it, I offered it freely and willingly.
 
2020-08-04 6:13:30 PM  
Look in a mirror, dude.
 
2020-08-04 6:19:20 PM  
Same guy:

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-04 7:04:14 PM  
I'm leasing it to the devil, because I get a better ROI that way.
 
2020-08-04 7:19:32 PM  
Y'ever notice that the people who act like they're getting into heaven are people who it would be pure hell to spend all eternity with?
 
2020-08-04 7:46:32 PM  
What is a pastor doing on a business channel?

Kidding.  I know exactly why he is on a business channel.  Hey false prophet, go peddle your lies elsewhere, we ain't buying.
 
2020-08-04 8:28:10 PM  
i.imgflip.comView Full Size
 
2020-08-04 9:09:36 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-04 9:55:01 PM  

bloobeary: Y'ever notice that the people who act like they're getting into heaven are people who it would be pure hell to spend all eternity with?


The same ones who think the walls are lined with gold--as if angels would ever surround themselves with that shiatty reminder of suffering. Probably also think heaven will have crosses everywhere, because, as Bill Hicks pointed out, that's the last farking thing anyone executed on a cross would ever want to see again.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-04 10:42:20 PM  
If Republicans are so against abortion, why didn't they pass a law against it the first two years of Trump's term? They've got a conservative SCOTUS. Always promising to kill abortion if you vote for them yet it never happens. Weird.
 
2020-08-04 11:14:44 PM  
Goo , because God clearly failed us.
 
2020-08-04 11:33:27 PM  
Let's set up a scoreboard for the number of commandments and seven deadly sins each candidate has broken.

Actually let's not bother.
 
2020-08-04 11:34:50 PM  
i can't sell what doesn't exist

hehe fark you, religion!
 
2020-08-04 11:45:25 PM  
If this guy's head would explode, I'd gladly sell my soul to the devil.  Where do I sign?
 
2020-08-05 12:32:16 AM  
You can trust this guy, he knows a thing or two about selling your soul to Satan.
 
2020-08-05 12:32:58 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-05 12:33:04 AM  
Well that f*cking hypocrite would know, wouldn't he. He already sold his.
 
2020-08-05 12:33:28 AM  
Not sure why Trump would buy souls for the cost of a Biden vote... but whatever.
 
2020-08-05 12:33:59 AM  
There's a black hole in this guy's shirt and it's sucking his head in through his collar.

deadstate.orgView Full Size
 
2020-08-05 12:34:27 AM  
Gee, and I don't even get demon sex out of it?

2.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size


How about a demon backrub, at least.
 
2020-08-05 12:34:42 AM  

bloobeary: Y'ever notice that the people who act like they're getting into heaven are people who it would be pure hell to spend all eternity a

n evening with?
 
2020-08-05 12:34:50 AM  
If Heaven is ruled by the God these self-righteous assholes profess, I'll take my chances in Hell, thanks much.

Of course I'm damned anyway so it's not like it matters.
 
2020-08-05 12:35:09 AM  
Satan does not exist. It was created as a tool of oppression and control.
 
2020-08-05 12:35:24 AM  
Right....yet the evangelicals who hitched their wagon to a pathological liar, philanderer and all around asshole who gassed a bunch of people so he could hold a Bible in front of a church are just doing the Lord's work.


And people wonder why people who identify as Christians continues to decrease.
 
2020-08-05 12:36:31 AM  
STOP GIVING STUPID PEOPLE AIRTIME.
 
2020-08-05 12:37:45 AM  

Hills-Sachs_Legion: If Heaven is ruled by the God these self-righteous assholes profess, I'll take my chances in Hell, thanks much.

Of course I'm damned anyway so it's not like it matters.


It's never too late to repent, friend. I have a pamphlet that I think you'll immediately throw in the trash can enjoy.
 
2020-08-05 12:37:50 AM  
The Devil's a pretty nice guy actually. I' d happily give him my soul anytime!
 
2020-08-05 12:38:48 AM  
At least he seems more sane than the guy who has a recording of Satan's voice. He didn't say how he got it. I can only assume Satan was calling him to tell him to fark off and stop using his name in vain in a voice mail or something.

While there are no recordings of Satan's voice on Millington's website, he does have a recording of a "demon" - which basically sounds like someone speaking incoherently into a rubber hose.

https://deadstate.org/christian-autho​r​-claims-to-have-first-ever-recording-o​f-satans-voice/
 
2020-08-05 12:40:07 AM  
We've got the best musicians.
 
2020-08-05 12:41:11 AM  
He isn't saying anything that hasn't already been said by RWNJs for...I dunno...how long now?  It's become overtly toxic the last few years, though.  Open dialogues have gone out the window, and there is no discussion left to be had when it has been decided that you and your beliefs are "evil".  Not just wrong, "evil".  There is no logical argument you can use against that type of judgement.  I've just given up.
 
2020-08-05 12:42:53 AM  
What is the going rate for an everlasting soul anyway?
 
2020-08-05 12:44:32 AM  

tonguedepressor: What is the going rate for an everlasting soul anyway?


Three fiddy
 
2020-08-05 12:44:38 AM  

saturn badger: At least he seems more sane than the guy who has a recording of Satan's voice. He didn't say how he got it. I can only assume Satan was calling him to tell him to fark off and stop using his name in vain in a voice mail or something.

While there are no recordings of Satan's voice on Millington's website, he does have a recording of a "demon" - which basically sounds like someone speaking incoherently into a rubber hose.

https://deadstate.org/christian-author​-claims-to-have-first-ever-recording-o​f-satans-voice/


SOUNDS OF HELL???
Youtube bvnxeX2SQso
 
2020-08-05 12:45:33 AM  
How did I know that it was going to be this sleazy mutherfugger before I even clicked the link?

He knows when Trump goes down, his little fundie gravy train of endless tax-free taxpayer cash comes to a screeching halt.
 
2020-08-05 12:46:26 AM  
No.
After this Covifd-19 debacle, you f*cks do not get to call yourselves "pro-life" ever again.

Not yours.
 
2020-08-05 12:46:30 AM  
Hey man don't spread that information around, I want to see if I can get some scotch and smokes in the deal when I trade in November and the Devil isn't gonna negotiate if he knows my price.
 
2020-08-05 12:49:18 AM  

edmo: If Republicans are so against abortion, why didn't they pass a law against it the first two years of Trump's term? They've got a conservative SCOTUS. Always promising to kill abortion if you vote for them yet it never happens. Weird.


See also: Hillary "Lock Her Up" Clinton.
 
2020-08-05 12:49:26 AM  
How to Burp a Newborn
Youtube fgcWOzauLxI


Sounds of Hell?
 
2020-08-05 12:49:53 AM  
Better than selling my soul to Trump.  At least the Devil is known for keeping his bargains.
 
2020-08-05 12:50:51 AM  

tonguedepressor: What is the going rate for an everlasting soul anyway?


All the gold you can eat.
 
2020-08-05 12:51:02 AM  

Skeleton Man: Hills-Sachs_Legion: If Heaven is ruled by the God these self-righteous assholes profess, I'll take my chances in Hell, thanks much.

Of course I'm damned anyway so it's not like it matters.

It's never too late to repent, friend. I have a pamphlet that I think you'll immediately throw in the trash can enjoy.


When I was a teenager running around with my stoner buddies and buddettes we'd find those chick tracts all over the place. You may recall that phone booths were used to get ahold of your guy and we knew the booths phone number so they could call us back to arrange a location.

Well, phone booths were a popular chick tract dump zone. We would laugh and laugh and laugh. Funny stuff. Knew one guy that actually collected them for the insane laughs they provided. I'm glad they're gone but now we have the web where the bat shiat insanity has just spread further.

Good times!
 
2020-08-05 12:52:34 AM  

SamFlagg: Hey man don't spread that information around, I want to see if I can get some scotch and smokes in the deal when I trade in November and the Devil isn't gonna negotiate if he knows my price.


Why would Satan throw in some scotch? He spends his scratch on people like Jeffress who corrupt the hearts, minds, and souls of millions of people all over the world.

What do you do? Blow cigarette smoke obnoxiously? Y'all probably wind up with some rotgut malted blend, and I suggest you act like you appreciate it when he hands it to you.
 
2020-08-05 12:53:37 AM  

AAAAGGGGHHHH: How did I know that it was going to be this sleazy mutherfugger before I even clicked the link?

He knows when Trump goes down, his little fundie gravy train of endless tax-free taxpayer cash comes to a screeching halt.


How much money did this a-hold get from the last stimulus?
 
2020-08-05 12:53:49 AM  

tonguedepressor: What is the going rate for an everlasting soul anyway?


A lot cheaper than the duracell soul or the eniguzer soul.
 
2020-08-05 12:55:50 AM  

gameshowhost: [Youtube-video https://www.youtube.com/embed/fgcWOzau​LxI]

Sounds of Hell?


Sounds, smells, tastes?

Look out when babies spit up!
Youtube vHQOBAe0J4w
 
2020-08-05 12:56:51 AM  

Hillbilly Jim: tonguedepressor: What is the going rate for an everlasting soul anyway?

A lot cheaper than the duracell soul or the eniguzer soul.


Not to mention counterfeit souls. Damn things aren't worth the sek to make em. Don't even bother asking for a refund if you get stuck with one.
 
2020-08-05 12:58:49 AM  
Can't sell what isn't mine and I don't have.

/Wife's a redhead
 
2020-08-05 12:59:55 AM  
If any of this Christianity stuff is actually true, I'm convinced that the devil actually won his rebellion and took God's place as ruler of Heaven. Everything written about him afterwards is propaganda used to solidify his claim to the throne. That's why the religion is so full of wicked and corrupt leaders.
 
2020-08-05 1:00:20 AM  
There are zero people left who support Trump that are not either criminal or insane.
 
2020-08-05 1:01:23 AM  

gameshowhost: [iFrame https://www.youtube.com/embed/fgcWOzau​LxI?autoplay=1&widget_referrer=https%3​A%2F%2Fwww.fark.com&start=0&enablejsap​i=1&origin=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.fark.com&​widgetid=1]

Sounds of Hell?


I kept waiting for the payoff...

Left disappointed.

Here.

26 Babies Vomit In 60 Seconds
Youtube KlMZY77BeUQ
 
2020-08-05 1:01:41 AM  
He doesn't actually care about abortion. They have no actual principles.
 
2020-08-05 1:01:59 AM  
I got no love, no love you'd call real.
 
2020-08-05 1:02:29 AM  

Harry_Seldon: Satan does not exist. It was created as a tool of oppression and control.


Yes we should only use scientifically validated methods of control.

Like political correctness.
 
2020-08-05 1:03:00 AM  
SLAYER!!!!!! \m/
 
2020-08-05 1:03:43 AM  
Republicans against abortion to "save lives" is BS.

1.7 MILLION embryos have been thrown away from fertility clinics.

When was the last time you heard Republicans politicians talk about banning that or them making this an issue?

When an embryo is not inside a woman they don't give a shiat about it.
 
2020-08-05 1:04:07 AM  

Iggie: gameshowhost: [Youtube-video https://www.youtube.com/embed/fgcWOzau​LxI]

Sounds of Hell?

Sounds, smells, tastes?

[Youtube-video https://www.youtube.com/embed/vHQOBAe0​J4w]


High Five!

media.giphy.comView Full Size
 
2020-08-05 1:04:39 AM  
He should watch this clip.  He might learn something.

Lucifer 3x07 Reese Threatens Luci with Knife What Do You Really Desire? Season 3 Episode 7 S03E07
Youtube AnmGthplAUM
 
2020-08-05 1:05:22 AM  

saturn badger: At least he seems more sane than the guy who has a recording of Satan's voice. He didn't say how he got it. I can only assume Satan was calling him to tell him to fark off and stop using his name in vain in a voice mail or something.

While there are no recordings of Satan's voice on Millington's website, he does have a recording of a "demon" - which basically sounds like someone speaking incoherently into a rubber hose.

https://deadstate.org/christian-author​-claims-to-have-first-ever-recording-o​f-satans-voice/


So...it's Ole Anderson doing the Shockmaster voice?
 
2020-08-05 1:05:29 AM  
Every accusation a confession.
 
2020-08-05 1:05:48 AM  
What d'ya reckon I'll get for it, hmmm?  A shiatty, broken country infested with southern fried trash, evangelicals and Nazis?  What kind of deal is that?
 
2020-08-05 1:06:43 AM  

I want that sauce Morty!: If any of this Christianity stuff is actually true, I'm convinced that the devil actually won his rebellion and took God's place as ruler of Heaven. Everything written about him afterwards is propaganda used to solidify his claim to the throne. That's why the religion is so full of wicked and corrupt leaders.


It's chock full of sexy stuff that gets the heart pumping. Solomon has, what, 700 wives? And it was ok and encouraged to throw big rocks at people you don't like? And you can get your fire insurance card and do whatever you want without consequences?

Yea, there's a big list of folks who sign up for that. Not so many folks care much for the story of Jesus spending an afternoon making a whip so he could go on a tear against the stockbrokers and bankers. Not much given to turning the other cheek either. (Which was heinously offensive back then by the way, because you'd have to slap with your other, clean hand. You'd make the person angry enough to forget themselves and thus sully what little hygiene the abuser had.)

But yea, lots of sexy stuff to get people in the door and the money to come rolling in. A racket as meek and simple as that is bound to attract every grifter imaginable.

In fact, it's amazing to me that Donald never figured that out for himself and established his own cult.
 
2020-08-05 1:06:48 AM  

I want that sauce Morty!: If any of this Christianity stuff is actually true, I'm convinced that the devil actually won his rebellion and took God's place as ruler of Heaven. Everything written about him afterwards is propaganda used to solidify his claim to the throne. That's why the religion is so full of wicked and corrupt leaders.


How men corrupt religion is not from god. Why would you think flawed people who write about god would actually represent God?

If you read the new testament, people like this are warned about.

American White Christianity has mostly only superficial relationship with Christs teachings.
 
2020-08-05 1:06:55 AM  

jsnbase: He doesn't actually care about abortion. They have no actual principles.


To be fair, they don't care about the babies. They care very much about controlling women.
 
2020-08-05 1:09:37 AM  

Stibium: Yea, there's a big list of folks who sign up for that. Not so many folks care much for the story of Jesus spending an afternoon making a whip so he could go on a tear against the stockbrokers and bankers.


Umm no it wasn't "stockbrokers" or "bankers".
 
2020-08-05 1:10:04 AM  
Ooga. Booga. I suffer fools not.
 
2020-08-05 1:10:15 AM  
I'd sell my soul if someone offers a lot money. I only got one of these things
 
2020-08-05 1:12:20 AM  

saturn badger: tonguedepressor: What is the going rate for an everlasting soul anyway?

Three fiddy


Was expecting at least a 72 Trans Am....what a rip.
 
2020-08-05 1:12:34 AM  

bughunter: High Five!

[media.giphy.com image 500x200] [View Full Size image _x_]


Back atcha!

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-05 1:14:21 AM  
Some will give you a new pickup truck for it.
Obscure?
 
2020-08-05 1:15:17 AM  
Satan: that's the deal and all I want in return is your everlasting soul.

Evangelist : wait, there must be a catch somewhere.
 
2020-08-05 1:16:44 AM  
Whatever it takes, dude.
 
2020-08-05 1:17:18 AM  

Corvus: Stibium: Yea, there's a big list of folks who sign up for that. Not so many folks care much for the story of Jesus spending an afternoon making a whip so he could go on a tear against the stockbrokers and bankers.

Umm no it wasn't "stockbrokers" or "bankers".


Not specifically, although banker is kinda close. I was just trying to contemporarialize the story for today's audience.

I'm sure Jesus would have plenty to say about our current crop of stockbrokers and their ill-gotten gains, as well as title loan usury and hostile banking practices.

Of course the money changers were pretty blasphemous, a bit more so than other secular money-making pastimes
 
2020-08-05 1:18:46 AM  

Surrender your boo-tah: Harry_Seldon: Satan does not exist. It was created as a tool of oppression and control.

Yes we should only use scientifically validated methods of control.

Like political correctness.


Screw political correctness. Assholes to the left of me...Assholes to the right of me

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-05 1:18:47 AM  

Alphax: He should watch this clip.  He might learn something.

[Youtube-video https://www.youtube.com/embed/AnmGthpl​AUM]


Just over two more weeks...*yay*
 
2020-08-05 1:18:59 AM  
Yup. I'm selling my made-up 'soul' to your made-up devil contrary to your made-up god.
It's 2020, grow the fark up already.
 
2020-08-05 1:24:00 AM  

SoberCannibal: Satan: that's the deal and all I want in return is your everlasting soul.

Evangelist : wait, there must be a catch somewhere.


Satan: You won't go to Heaven.

Evangelist: You mean I'll go to hell?

Satan: Where do you think you are?
 
2020-08-05 1:29:19 AM  
If people like this guy are going to be heaven, then heaven must not be all that then.
 
2020-08-05 1:31:23 AM  

Mrtraveler01: If people like this guy are going to be heaven, then heaven must not be all that then.


From an old joke..

Guy having lunch with God in Heaven: 'Looks like they're having much better food down in Hell.. why are we here eating celery sticks and crackers and stuff?'
God: 'Well, it's a lot harder to cook for two.'
 
2020-08-05 1:31:26 AM  
If you're doing business with a religious son-of-a-biatch, get it in writing.
His word isn't worth shiat. Not with the good lord telling him how to f#$k you on the deal.
...
Now some of you may encounter the Devil's Bargain, if you get that far.
Any old soul is worth saving, at least to a priest, but not every soul is worth buying.
So you can take the offer as a compliment.

-William S. Burroughs
 
2020-08-05 1:31:51 AM  
Dear Satan,

For my eternal soul I would like Donald Trump to be found guilty of all his crimes, and while in prison suffer an absolutely horrible but incredibly hilarious accident involving a bar of soap, a dumbbell, a packet of ramen, and some pepper spray. Also a pony.

Hail you,
Almea

PS. I'm Canadian so I can't streamline the process by voting for Joe Biden. Sorry.
 
2020-08-05 1:32:17 AM  
For some reason this guy's church pays no taxes.
 
2020-08-05 1:32:21 AM  

Corvus: I want that sauce Morty!: If any of this Christianity stuff is actually true, I'm convinced that the devil actually won his rebellion and took God's place as ruler of Heaven. Everything written about him afterwards is propaganda used to solidify his claim to the throne. That's why the religion is so full of wicked and corrupt leaders.

How men corrupt religion is not from god. Why would you think flawed people who write about god would actually represent God?

If you read the new testament, people like this are warned about.

American White Christianity has mostly only superficial relationship with Christs teachings.


I went off on looking up a bible quote from elsewhere and the page I hit had 26 versions from 26 different bibles. Earlier I did the same and it was from the NLT (new living testament?) and it didn't read like a bible at all. It was more like revenge porn.

So these are not translations but books called bibles to control them. No matter what point they want to make there is a book for it.

Then there was Stalin pulling feathers from a chicken to make a biblical point. Something about pulling all the feathers out then feeding it and it followed him everywhere. I guess it was a socialism deal but it didn't have anything to do with the quote.

Once you look into it a bit it is a very weird place to tread.
 
2020-08-05 1:34:34 AM  

Mithiwithi: jsnbase: He doesn't actually care about abortion. They have no actual principles.

To be fair, they don't care about the babies. They care very much about controlling women.


And minorities. It wasn't popular to be racist in the day of Roe vs Wade so they latched on to abortions to try and hide it.
 
2020-08-05 1:35:48 AM  
Put is red mark on your forehead today?
 
2020-08-05 1:36:06 AM  
i have typed and deleted a bunch of thoughts/comments and have ultimately decided to go with; go fark your self.
 
2020-08-05 1:36:45 AM  

bughunter: gameshowhost: [iFrame https://www.youtube.com/embed/fgcWOzau​LxI?autoplay=1&widget_referrer=https%3​A%2F%2Fwww.fark.com&start=0&enablejsap​i=1&origin=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.fark.com&​widgetid=1]

Sounds of Hell?

I kept waiting for the payoff...

Left disappointed.

Here.

[Youtube-video https://www.youtube.com/embed/KlMZY77B​eUQ]


I figured the mutant infant was entertainment enough.
 
2020-08-05 1:45:08 AM  

la_mariee_mise_a_nu: If you're doing business with a religious son-of-a-biatch, get it in writing.
His word isn't worth shiat. Not with the good lord telling him how to f#$k you on the deal.
...
Now some of you may encounter the Devil's Bargain, if you get that far.
Any old soul is worth saving, at least to a priest, but not every soul is worth buying.
So you can take the offer as a compliment.

-William S. Burroughs


Burroughs is awesome.

I couldn't quite recall what he had to say about counterfeit souls in that book, so I kinda ad-libbed the gist. Kinda nice that is not too obscure for Fark.
 
2020-08-05 1:46:44 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-05 1:46:55 AM  
I wouldn't listen to him about selling souls because he clearly got a bad deal for his.
 
2020-08-05 1:47:11 AM  
When you can't beat your opponent of facts,
threaten everybody with eternal harm (from him) if they don't do what you want.

This Loser can't even argue against facts.
 
2020-08-05 1:48:13 AM  
I have one steadfast rule in my life. Never take advice somebody that has a shiaty toupee.
 
2020-08-05 1:52:52 AM  
Last time Biden was in office, you had 8 great years for America - in just about every way.

For the last 4 years Trump has been in office, you've had non-stop scandals, non-stop lies, non-stop childish behaviour, race riots, broken down international alliances, global disrespect/mockery, a plague of biblical proportions, and the U.S. diving into a once in a 100 year Great Depression.

Take your "soul" threats bullshiat and stick it up your arse.
 
2020-08-05 1:57:34 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size


Trump's demon spawn crotchfruit has already descended the world into hell.
 
2020-08-05 1:59:21 AM  
gimme that paper, bet yer ass I will sign ...
Cuz I need a beer and it's tittie-squeezing time!
 
2020-08-05 2:00:22 AM  

AeAe: I'd sell my soul if someone offers a lot money. I only got one of these things


$5 is the going rate

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-05 2:03:41 AM  
I thought that anyone who didn't sell their soul to Hillary had already transferred the title to the Obamas. At this point, do any liberal Democrats even have souls left to sell?

/we are a godless nation
//just as some of the founders intended
 
2020-08-05 2:06:18 AM  

yagottabefarkinkiddinme: [Fark user image 425x307]

Trump's demon spawn crotchfruit has already descended the world into hell.


She looks like a character out of Beetlejuice II, if such a thing existed.
 
2020-08-05 2:11:47 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-05 2:13:15 AM  

Znuh: STOP GIVING STUPID PEOPLE AIRTIME.


But most people watching and buying all that shiat ads are shilling wanna see stupid people.
 
2020-08-05 2:14:13 AM  

Stud Gerbil: gimme that paper, bet yer ass I will sign ...
Cuz I need a beer and it's tittie-squeezing time!


Frank Zappa died far too young.
 
2020-08-05 2:14:50 AM  
Pat Robertson once whined about abortion because (and get this) it reduced the numbers of born people who would grow up to become soldiers and taxpayers.

The. F*cking. GALL!

That's how he sees us? As cannon-fodder to fight in his republican Jesus wars and as walking wallets to pay taxes so that he never has to?
 
2020-08-05 2:38:53 AM  
Cool. I'm Jewish. There is no devil.
 
2020-08-05 2:42:06 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-05 2:45:16 AM  
Just a reminder that I think Christians in particular are delusional idiots.

I lost count of all the reasons I have to believe that. Throw this one on the heap.

Hail Satan.
 
2020-08-05 2:45:37 AM  
This guy looks like the kind of pastor the other church leaders know to never leave alone with female members of the youth group.
 
2020-08-05 2:56:18 AM  
I despise any religion that says you don't need to be a good person to go into heaven, that believing and accepting Jesus as your lord and saviour is enough.

That's not a belief system, that's a cheat code.
 
2020-08-05 3:16:07 AM  
I take this turd isn't up to date with the Lucifer series.  He has changed a lot since the Garden of Eden.
 
2020-08-05 3:22:24 AM  

padraig: I despise any religion that says you don't need to be a good person to go into heaven, that believing and accepting Jesus as your lord and saviour is enough.

That's not a belief system, that's a cheat code.


I like to remind my mother that she'll be sharing heaven with a bunch of rapists, child molesters, murderers and thieves who converted to Christianity in prison. Why bother being a good person when you can just mumble a quick apology to god (not the victim) whenever you screw up and go about your life guilt free?
 
2020-08-05 3:27:36 AM  
Robert Jeffress also believes only Christians should be elected into office, excluding all Jews, Muslims and non-believers. He preaches this at his church in Dallas. You can hear it on the radio nationally, and he is an integral part of this administration. McCain had the character to reject this brand of Christian White Nationalism a little over a decade ago, but Trump embraces them.
 
2020-08-05 3:41:40 AM  
Well, sign me up for selling my soul then. Trump can't ride like this:

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-05 3:41:41 AM  

Corvus: Republicans against abortion to "save lives" is BS.

1.7 MILLION embryos have been thrown away from fertility clinics.

When was the last time you heard Republicans politicians talk about banning that or them making this an issue?

When an embryo is not inside a woman they don't give a shiat about it.


That's the solution then... no abortions, just take the embryo/fetus out and stick in a jar on a shelf for a while. You aren't "killing" a baby, just "pausing" it. I have it on the authority of the Texas State Legislature that you can put an fetus back in any time after you take it out.
 
2020-08-05 3:59:03 AM  

Langdon_777: I take this turd isn't up to date with the Lucifer series.  He has changed a lot since the Garden of Eden.


What if you're playing with Supernatural continuity?
 
2020-08-05 4:01:22 AM  
AC/DC - Highway to Hell (Official Video)
Youtube l482T0yNkeo
 
2020-08-05 4:26:12 AM  

Gr3asy: Langdon_777: I take this turd isn't up to date with the Lucifer series.  He has changed a lot since the Garden of Eden.

What if you're playing with Supernatural continuity?


I became a fan of Satan once I realised that he was the one who questioned "God" and gave us human's the Knowledge of Good and Evil.  Before that we were just "it is what it is," after that we started doing things to help ourselves, like agriculture.
 
2020-08-05 4:56:13 AM  
He can't even get his own church, the Catholic Church, to stomach it.

TIL that Joe Biden owns Catholicism.
 
2020-08-05 4:58:41 AM  
Every accusation is a confession.
 
2020-08-05 5:17:43 AM  

Nadie_AZ: Same guy:

[Fark user image image 640x633]


Pretty sure that is a shop, only one finger is extended on his hand.
 
2020-08-05 5:43:37 AM  
Well it's only for 4 to 8 years so it's really more of a long term lease.
 
2020-08-05 6:37:52 AM  
Who died and made him boss?

Jesus, apparently Jesus.

What an asshole.
 
2020-08-05 6:41:49 AM  
Read the fine print, "acts of perversion in Hell." Hell has a benefit package.

I know this guy who sold his soul and spent 1000 years doing all sorts of perverted things in Hell. Now he is a demon having dream sex that causes COVID and low poll numbers.
 
2020-08-05 7:01:40 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-05 7:08:00 AM  

gameshowhost: i can't sell what doesn't exist

hehe fark you, religion!


I figured this article was about you guys.
 
2020-08-05 7:08:16 AM  
So wait?

We have to put with aaaaaaallllllllllllllllllllll this bullshait because of abortion rights?

Fark you.
 
2020-08-05 7:25:08 AM  
See here the problem is Biden won't kill off enough people, whereas Trump will have gallons upon gallons of blood spilled all to honor the blood god. Biden will enact wimpy policies that saves lives, which is totally the opposite of what Jesus would want. Jesus needs blood, and thus we must appease the blood god.

Seriously folks, any wonder why atheism/agnosticism is the only growing demographic? Any wonder why percentage of religious believers drops every decade? Anyone still question why Christians are rapidly becoming a minority? For that I am grateful for Trump, he has hastened the decline of religion faster than any event or person the past century.
 
2020-08-05 7:25:36 AM  
And to think Thomas Jefferson took time out from slaving to include the plea of the baptists to protect America from religion by including a first amendment right to separate government from religion.

Add to that the whining of this "pastor" and his ilk about the irs being mean to those who game non profit tax exempt status.
 
2020-08-05 7:27:59 AM  
I mean, Hell seems a lot safer than here. Nobody dies from eternal damnation.
 
2020-08-05 7:32:47 AM  
If god is all-powerful, can he make a cock so big that he himself can't suck it?
 
2020-08-05 7:38:01 AM  
Thanks, but the "devil" is less evil than most right wing trash in 2020.

Bulldoze everything right wing trash loves.
 
2020-08-05 7:40:27 AM  
Just more Republican projection.
 
2020-08-05 7:42:00 AM  

texanjeff: So wait?

We have to put with aaaaaaallllllllllllllllllllll this bullshait because of abortion rights?

Fark you.


We are putting up with this bullshiat because of dopamine deprivation.

Religion removes much of the pleasure in life (dopamine feedback) so manipulators can use dopamine feedback to condition the followers to do what they want in return for a taste of that sweet release of pleasure.Usually by doing what the powers that be want and getting praise for it and feelings of accomplishment and the little bits of dopamine.

If you're a "religious" person but doubt your own authenticity there are still ways to get your dopamine fix. Just contrast yourself against "evildoers" and standup for any extreme issue in the name of "justice"  and poof, you are a superhero...the self-gratification will get you your dopamine.

This is how Trump (and Q) followers get roped in (whether or not someone's religious, too).  Give people misery with no path to actual psychological pleasure and they'll do anything to find a scapegoat/strawman to fight against to get that self-gratification.  It's at the core of cults, too. Miserable people just need a hook to find their dopamine switch, is it money? Prosperity gospel. Is it social contact/status? Organized religion. Weak ego? Social restrictions.

Happy well-educated people with a knowledge of their worth have no need for the dopamine cycle of addiction.

If we want to understand these kooks we have to understand where they get their dopamine kicks from and limit the supply.
 
2020-08-05 7:43:07 AM  
Too late.  Supposedly I've already sold my soul to the Devil by believing that the Earth is round, more than 6,000 year old, and orbits around the Sun.
 
2020-08-05 7:43:37 AM  

edmo: If Republicans are so against abortion, why didn't they pass a law against it the first two years of Trump's term? They've got a conservative SCOTUS. Always promising to kill abortion if you vote for them yet it never happens. Weird.


In many states, abortion for all practical purposes is illegal, unless you're rich. Stop pretending Republicans are making no inroads on this.
 
2020-08-05 7:47:06 AM  

sirrerun: No.
After this Covifd-19 debacle, you f*cks do not get to call yourselves "pro-life" ever again.

Not yours.


Who's going to stop them? The language police?
 
2020-08-05 7:59:21 AM  

Stibium: Corvus: Stibium: Yea, there's a big list of folks who sign up for that. Not so many folks care much for the story of Jesus spending an afternoon making a whip so he could go on a tear against the stockbrokers and bankers.

Umm no it wasn't "stockbrokers" or "bankers".

Not specifically, although banker is kinda close. I was just trying to contemporarialize the story for today's audience.

I'm sure Jesus would have plenty to say about our current crop of stockbrokers and their ill-gotten gains, as well as title loan usury and hostile banking practices.

Of course the money changers were pretty blasphemous, a bit more so than other secular money-making pastimes


The really funny thing is there was a time when Christians took Jesus' anger against the moneylenders seriously, and so Christians couldn't be bankers. It was one of the few professions Jews were allowed to have, and led to the "greedy Jew" stereotype.
 
2020-08-05 8:01:04 AM  
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2020-08-05 8:01:29 AM  
Why is an evangelical voice coming on a "Fox Business News" segment? Lou wouldn't just be a shameless shill for Trump, would he?

/LD hasn't legitimately discussed Business News since 1996
 
2020-08-05 8:09:22 AM  

Langdon_777: I take this turd isn't up to date with the Lucifer series.  He has changed a lot since the Garden of Eden.


It wasn't even Lucifer in the Garden, just one of his subordinates.
pmcvariety.files.wordpress.comView Full Size
 
2020-08-05 8:12:05 AM  
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2020-08-05 8:13:21 AM  
"I mean, it's so barbaric, Joe Biden believes in unrestricted abortion. He can't even get his own church, the Catholic Church, to stomach it. They have denied him communion because of that."

Abortion is so barbaric it is in the Bible:

The Bible supports abortion performed by priests by giving an abortifacient to women in 20 unambiguous verses, Numbers 5:11-31, especially read 27: If she has made herself impure and been unfaithful to her husband, this will be the result: When she is made to drink the water that brings a curse and causes bitter suffering, it will enter her, her abdomen will swell and her womb will miscarry, and she will become a curse.

Numbers 5:11-31 The Test for an Unfaithful Wife

11Then the Lord said to Moses, 12"Speak to the Israelites and say to them: 'If a man's wife goes astray and is unfaithful to him 13so that another man has sexual relations with her, and this is hidden from her husband and her impurity is undetected (since there is no witness against her and she has not been caught in the act), 14and if feelings of jealousy come over her husband and he suspects his wife and she is impure-or if he is jealous and suspects her even though she is not impure- 15then he is to take his wife to the priest. He must also take an offering of a tenth of an ephah[a] of barley flour on her behalf. He must not pour olive oil on it or put incense on it, because it is a grain offering for jealousy, a reminder-offering to draw attention to wrongdoing.

16"'The priest shall bring her and have her stand before the Lord. 17Then he shall take some holy water in a clay jar and put some dust from the tabernacle floor into the water. 18After the priest has had the woman stand before the Lord, he shall loosen her hair and place in her hands the reminder-offering, the grain offering for jealousy, while he himself holds the bitter water that brings a curse. 19Then the priest shall put the woman under oath and say to her, "If no other man has had sexual relations with you and you have not gone astray and become impure while married to your husband, may this bitter water that brings a curse not harm you. 20But if you have gone astray while married to your husband and you have made yourself impure by having sexual relations with a man other than your husband"- 21here the priest is to put the woman under this curse-"may the Lord cause you to become a curse among your people when he makes your womb miscarry and your abdomen swell. 22May this water that brings a curse enter your body so that your abdomen swells or your womb miscarries."

"'Then the woman is to say, "Amen. So be it."

23"'The priest is to write these curses on a scroll and then wash them off into the bitter water. 24He shall make the woman drink the bitter water that brings a curse, and this water that brings a curse and causes bitter suffering will enter her. 25The priest is to take from her hands the grain offering for jealousy, wave it before the Lord and bring it to the altar. 26The priest is then to take a handful of the grain offering as a memorial[c] offering and burn it on the altar; after that, he is to have the woman drink the water. 27If she has made herself impure and been unfaithful to her husband, this will be the result: When she is made to drink the water that brings a curse and causes bitter suffering, it will enter her, her abdomen will swell and her womb will miscarry, and she will become a curse. 28If, however, the woman has not made herself impure, but is clean, she will be cleared of guilt and will be able to have children.

29"'This, then, is the law of jealousy when a woman goes astray and makes herself impure while married to her husband, 30or when feelings of jealousy come over a man because he suspects his wife. The priest is to have her stand before the Lord and is to apply this entire law to her. 31The husband will be innocent of any wrongdoing, but the woman will bear the consequences of her sin.'"

Notice it says the men that do this sort of thing are 'guiltless' and the women bear all of the punishment. Lovely book you have there, it just struggles to see how low it can go.

And if you say the old laws are not still valid:
Matthew 5:18 For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled.

"Till heaven and earth pass" and "...till all be fulfilled" means everything. Time ends. Judgement. All the laws. Get a clue, the Torah/Bible/Koran or the Abrahamic religion (all the same religion with slightly different takes) are nothing but lies, and inherently from lies, evil.

 
2020-08-05 8:15:08 AM  
Sorry there was a in there from the copypasta.
 
2020-08-05 8:16:27 AM  

Tyrone Slothrop: Langdon_777: I take this turd isn't up to date with the Lucifer series.  He has changed a lot since the Garden of Eden.

It wasn't even Lucifer in the Garden, just one of his subordinates.
[pmcvariety.files.wordpress.com image 850x478]


Incidentally, that picture came from an article about a Christian group protesting "Good Omens", and demanding it be removed from Netflix.
 
2020-08-05 8:18:31 AM  

edmo: If Republicans are so against abortion, why didn't they pass a law against it the first two years of Trump's term? They've got a conservative SCOTUS. Always promising to kill abortion if you vote for them yet it never happens. Weird.


The GOP controlled the house, senate, executive, and SCOTUS.
What would the GOP stand for if they lost their righteous anger at abortion?  Also, jailing and executing large numbers of women actually is not as popular as Trump's base thinks, many of whom have had abortions.
It's very easy to cover for your corruption and sexual deviant behavior if you just pay lip service to pro-lifers.  Just ask Donald Trump or Roy Moore.  They both have two things in common.
 
2020-08-05 8:23:47 AM  
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2020-08-05 8:24:28 AM  
arc-anglerfish-arc2-prod-bostonglobe.s3.amazonaws.comView Full Size
 
2020-08-05 8:24:48 AM  
1.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size
 
2020-08-05 8:25:28 AM  
media.nj.comView Full Size
 
2020-08-05 8:33:53 AM  

RasIanI: Why is an evangelical voice coming on a "Fox Business News" segment? Lou wouldn't just be a shameless shill for Trump, would he?

/LD hasn't legitimately discussed Business News since 1996


I remember watching a Nebraska game last fall that was getting shown on Fox Business Channel (it's dark days up in Lincoln), and Lou Dobbs thanking President Trump for the weekend on a rebroadcast was what they were showing before the game. It was funny to see all the Husker fans in the game thread who are politically unplugged even react in bewilderment to that claim.
 
2020-08-05 8:36:09 AM  
Well if you DON'T vote for him, you ain't Black, so you have a choice here, don't you? You're either Black or a lover of Satan. Whaddaya gonna do?
 
2020-08-05 8:40:49 AM  

jjorsett: Well if you DON'T vote for him, you ain't Black, so you have a choice here, don't you? You're either Black or a lover of Satan. Whaddaya gonna do?


Keep reaching, it is entertaining to watch you fail.
 
2020-08-05 8:49:20 AM  
Was it the Brian Jonestown Massacre that sang "I tried selling my soul, but the line was so long I said Fark it".

Words of wisdom.
 
2020-08-05 9:11:53 AM  
Jokes on him I traded mine for a really nice gaming PC.
 
2020-08-05 9:24:58 AM  
If even one political statement was enough to cost you your tax exempt status for the year, like you'd imagine separation of church and state would...pastors would be more careful about claiming who god wants you to vote for.

In fact, it should be penalized by charging them taxes at the highest possible bracket that year,   allowing for no allowances.

Religion in America is weaponized. It will alwsys have a role in politics. But if churches can influence elections with their voices or money, and allowed to get away with it - why pretend there is a wall separating church and state?
 
2020-08-05 9:48:36 AM  

edmo: If Republicans are so against abortion, why didn't they pass a law against it the first two years of Trump's term? They've got a conservative SCOTUS. Always promising to kill abortion if you vote for them yet it never happens. Weird.


People like Jeffress would vote for Hitler if he promised to ban abortion.  It is not an exaggeration.  It is exactly how societies sink into authoritarianism.
 
2020-08-05 10:26:12 AM  
What christian has a soul these days?  It's just an evil cult of trump worship.
 
2020-08-05 11:11:45 AM  

BizarreMan: I didn't sell it, I offered it freely and willingly.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-05 11:21:22 AM  
So if I vote for Biden, I'll become a great blues guitar player? Deal!
 
2020-08-05 11:21:46 AM  
You know, there used to be some sort of law that prohibited churches from using their pulpits to force congregations to vote for one candidate and not vote for the other.

But here we see an in-broad-daylight violation where some preacher is openly telling christians if they vote Biden they're going straight to Hell. That's no mere "vote with your conscience" type of gentle prodding. That's using a cattle prod and a baseball bat.
 
2020-08-05 12:38:07 PM  

GoldSpider: gameshowhost: i can't sell what doesn't exist

hehe fark you, religion!

I figured this article was about you guys.


I'm only one person (._. ) wtf
 
2020-08-05 12:39:05 PM  

Marcos P: Jokes on him I traded mine for a really nice gaming PC.


Except it's covered in RGB and lights up the entire neighborhood. Satan!!
 
2020-08-05 3:44:43 PM  
I wonder what Jeffress and his ilk would think of the prophecies of "Bands"?

tonguedepressor: saturn badger: tonguedepressor: What is the going rate for an everlasting soul anyway?

Three fiddy

Was expecting at least a 72 Trans Am....what a rip.

Massively Multiplayer Addict: The Devil's a pretty nice guy actually. I' d happily give him my soul anytime!

I'm reminded of how the "Satan" of South Park is portrayed as much nicer than the "God" thereof. Stan Marsh asked God a question on the eve of Y2K (that he was pretty much maneuvered into asking) and the whole world briefly hated him for it because he wasted humanity's one question per millennium to ask of God (Stan asked why he hadn't gotten his period yet). Years later, Stan asked Satan a question and Satan sat in Stan's bedroom and patiently explained the mechanism of addiction (he then did possess Stan, but he asked permission first, so that he could confront Beelzeboot the Canadian Devil).
 
2020-08-05 4:32:48 PM  

johnphantom: "I mean, it's so barbaric, Joe Biden believes in unrestricted abortion. He can't even get his own church, the Catholic Church, to stomach it. They have denied him communion because of that."

Abortion is so barbaric it is in the Bible:

The Bible supports abortion performed by priests by giving an abortifacient to women in 20 unambiguous verses, Numbers 5:11-31, especially read 27: If she has made herself impure and been unfaithful to her husband, this will be the result: When she is made to drink the water that brings a curse and causes bitter suffering, it will enter her, her abdomen will swell and her womb will miscarry, and she will become a curse.

Numbers 5:11-31 The Test for an Unfaithful Wife

11Then the Lord said to Moses, 12"Speak to the Israelites and say to them: 'If a man's wife goes astray and is unfaithful to him 13so that another man has sexual relations with her, and this is hidden from her husband and her impurity is undetected (since there is no witness against her and she has not been caught in the act), 14and if feelings of jealousy come over her husband and he suspects his wife and she is impure-or if he is jealous and suspects her even though she is not impure- 15then he is to take his wife to the priest. He must also take an offering of a tenth of an ephah[a] of barley flour on her behalf. He must not pour olive oil on it or put incense on it, because it is a grain offering for jealousy, a reminder-offering to draw attention to wrongdoing.

16"'The priest shall bring her and have her stand before the Lord. 17Then he shall take some holy water in a clay jar and put some dust from the tabernacle floor into the water. 18After the priest has had the woman stand before the Lord, he shall loosen her hair and place in her hands the reminder-offering, the grain offering for jealousy, while he himself holds the bitter water that brings a curse. 19Then the priest shall put the woman under oath and say to her, "If no other man has had sexual relations w ...

See also the middle part of Numbers Chapter 3 wherein the LORD twice commands a census, first of the Levites, then of all Israelites, "from a month old and up." Seven times that phrase occurs therein: twice the LORD God HImself commanding it, and the other five describing it being carried out. This divinely ordered census is what gave the Book of Numbers its very name! It's also referenced once in Deuteronomy with the same restriction: "from a month old and up."

And Leviticus Chapter 27, in which the LORD assigns monetary value in His eye to persons based on gender (men worth more than women, natch) and age group (working / warring / childbearing age worth the most, followed by youth and older children, followed by seniors, and finally infants through preschool age ― but even that last group has a minimum age specified: "from a month old even unto five years old." The seniors age group has no maximum age specified to its range, so it's not like God didn't understand the concept of a single-bounded numeric range. No value at all is specified for those under age one month ― they have no value whatsoever in the eyes of the LORD God of Israel!

Thus, the Law of Moses makes it quite plain that not only does Personhood in their God's eyes not begin at conception (let alone fertilization), it doesn't begin at "quickening" either (the usual demarcation in medieval times when the soul was said to enter the body), nor at birth, nor at first breath. It's not until a lunar month (Semitic calendar of the time) had passed: basically, the parents were to look at the Moon on the night the baby was born, mark its phase, then not consider it a full Person until the moon returned to that same phase. (Of course, this was because infant mortality was so high back then that it wasn't worth it to get attached to the kid until it'd proven it could survive at least a month.)

This continued into the time of the New Testament, too. "Abortion is moider!" types will tell you that the Koine Greek word for "unborn" is the same as for "newborn." This is true! But they neglect to mention that not only did the Greeks and Romans and others in the region practice abortion without legal penalty, they also practiced infanticide ― aain, without legal penalty! The demarcation was about a month old. After that, the term for "infant" was a different term with a different legal status involving being considered a Person. It was legal to kill a human at any stage denoted by the other term, whether pre- or post-birth, because they weren't considered Persons yet!

"Murder" is defined as the unjustifiable and intentional killing of a Person, not merely a human being.
 
2020-08-05 5:39:46 PM  
"And I didn't even keep the receipt."

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-05 6:23:24 PM  

edmo: If Republicans are so against abortion, why didn't they pass a law against it the first two years of Trump's term? They've got a conservative SCOTUS. Always promising to kill abortion if you vote for them yet it never happens. Weird.


Many people vote republicans only for the abortion issue. If abortion was illegal they'd have no reason to vote.
 
2020-08-05 6:29:55 PM  

Mugato: edmo: If Republicans are so against abortion, why didn't they pass a law against it the first two years of Trump's term? They've got a conservative SCOTUS. Always promising to kill abortion if you vote for them yet it never happens. Weird.

Many people vote republicans only for the abortion issue. If abortion was illegal they'd have no reason to vote.

So much this!
 
2020-08-05 8:52:58 PM  

Tyrone Slothrop: Langdon_777: I take this turd isn't up to date with the Lucifer series.  He has changed a lot since the Garden of Eden.

It wasn't even Lucifer in the Garden, just one of his subordinates.
[pmcvariety.files.wordpress.com image 850×478]

I didn't see a comment from you in this thread, so I don't know if you caught the Quarantine Special that the two main characters made on the 30th Anniversary of the original publication of Good Omens, but just in case you haven't, enjoy:
Good Omens: Lockdown
Youtube quSXoj8Kob0

Alphax: He should watch this clip.  He might learn something.

[Youtube-video https://www.youtube.com/embed/AnmGthpl​AUM]

I never watched that series because I know that "Lucifer" in the Bible was never Satan in the first place, nor any fallen angel. He's just a human being, albeit the most politically powerful one known to exist or have ever existed as far as the Israelites of the time knew: the King of Babylon. Isaiah chapter 14, the only place where "Lucifer" is mentioned (and only in the KJV and a few other translations at that), says this outright.

It's based on the Neil Gaiman's DC Comics version of the character from Sandman and the Lucifer comics, right?

That video clip, which echoes a scene from his Sandman appearance (where Dream goes to Hell to challenge Lucifer for the soul of Nada, prompting Lucifer to quit being ruler of Hell and to shut the place down), makes me wonder about another fictional version of Satan, namely, the South Park version (R.I.P.?).

Only Mormons go to South Park's "Heaven" and everyone else goes to its "Hell." But why? Mormonism is very much not the true religion in the South Park world. Even discounting Joseph Smith's history as summarized in "All About the Mormons," there's also the fact that neither the South Park "God" nor "Satan" look human, and the angels (as seen in "BFF") have wings. In LDS theology, God and Satan are both fully human in form, as are angels. "Wings" spoken of in the Bible are symbolic, not literal. Also, the whole idea that only Mormons would go to "Heaven" is itself a contradiction of LDS theology which holds that there are multiple levels of "Heaven" and that everyone who doesn't blaspheme the Holy Ghost will at least achieve the lowest level, and those that live by whatever religious or moral or ethical code they believe to the best of their ability will achieve the middle level which is at least as good as the Garden of Eden.

I speculate that the reason is that other religions believe that you need only confess sins to God (most Protestants) or to a priest (Catholics) to have them absolved, or even that you only have to accept Jesus Christ as Personal Savior to be saved (Dispensationalism and others). So, when you die, you still have feelings of guilt over what you did to friends and family and even people you didn't know nor care about while alive, and those keep you from walking out of Hell because you don't feel worthy of Heaven.

The LDS believe that you have to confess sins to the people you wronged, do your best to make restitution, and beg their forgiveness (they don't have to give it, but you're supposed to ask), and only then does the blood of Christ fully wash the sins away. All sins are offenses against God and need to be confessed to Him, but sins against others need to be confessed to them as well. So LDS who truly live by that would be the only ones who feel that they have truly recompensed those who they wronged to the best of their ability, and thus not feel the need to be punished in Hell.
 
2020-08-05 9:24:38 PM  

COMALite J: I never watched that series because I know that "Lucifer" in the Bible was never Satan in the first place, nor any fallen angel.


You don't watch a fantasy show because it isn't historically accurate?

/never saw the show myself
//loves "Lucifer"
///knows it's not a documentary
 
2020-08-05 11:32:03 PM  

Mugato: Many people vote republicans only for the abortion issue. If abortion was illegal they'd have no reason to vote.


They'd vote to keep it illegal.
 
2020-08-06 12:17:03 AM  
The main way in Christianity to guarantee the loss of your soul even if you were "saved" is to Blaspheme the Holy Ghost.

You know, like 51 of the 53 Republican Senators did when they raised their right hands to the square with fingers pointed towards His Heavenly Throne, and swore, "so help me, God!" to render impartial justice ― an oath that those 51 had no intentions of keeping even at the time they swore the oath, because just weeks later they voted to not even hear witnesses or see evidence against Trump.

Swearing falsely in the name of God is a form of blasphemy, and since nearly all if not absolutely all of these GOP Senators claim to profess Trinitarian Christianity, they believe that God includes God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Ghost, so they blasphemed the Holy Ghost which Jesus Christ Himself said would not be forgiven, in this world or in the world to come. His words, in red ink.

Mugato: Let's set up a scoreboard for the number of commandments and seven deadly sins each candidate has broken.

Actually let's not bother.

And Beatitudes (100% red ink in a Red Letter Edition) that each has been the 180° diametric opposite of.
 
2020-08-06 12:21:31 AM  

BMFPitt: Mugato: Many people vote republicans only for the abortion issue. If abortion was illegal they'd have no reason to vote.

They'd vote to keep it illegal.


Perhaps. But in a lot less droves.
 
2020-08-06 12:45:02 AM  

COMALite J: The main way in Christianity to guarantee the loss of your soul even if you were "saved" is to Blaspheme the Holy Ghost.

You know, like 51 of the 53 Republican Senators did when they raised their right hands to the square with fingers pointed towards His Heavenly Throne, and swore, "so help me, God!" to render impartial justice ― an oath that those 51 had no intentions of keeping even at the time they swore the oath, because just weeks later they voted to not even hear witnesses or see evidence against Trump.

Swearing falsely in the name of God is a form of blasphemy, and since nearly all if not absolutely all of these GOP Senators claim to profess Trinitarian Christianity, they believe that God includes God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Ghost, so they blasphemed the Holy Ghost which Jesus Christ Himself said would not be forgiven, in this world or in the world to come. His words, in red ink.

Mugato: Let's set up a scoreboard for the number of commandments and seven deadly sins each candidate has broken.

Actually let's not bother.
And Beatitudes (100% red ink in a Red Letter Edition) that each has been the 180° diametric opposite of.


I've finally decided that your farkie is "Detailed explanations of why Republicans are anti-Christian." As someone who used to be Christian, who steeped himself in Christian doctrine, and who still holds a torch for Christianity long after I professed to stop actually believing in Christ, I always find your posts fascinating.

/its been more than 42 months since the inauguration and Trump's still in office, therefore he isn't the Beast
 
2020-08-06 12:50:12 AM  

Mithiwithi: COMALite J: The main way in Christianity to guarantee the loss of your soul even if you were "saved" is to Blaspheme the Holy Ghost.

You know, like 51 of the 53 Republican Senators did when they raised their right hands to the square with fingers pointed towards His Heavenly Throne, and swore, "so help me, God!" to render impartial justice ― an oath that those 51 had no intentions of keeping even at the time they swore the oath, because just weeks later they voted to not even hear witnesses or see evidence against Trump.

Swearing falsely in the name of God is a form of blasphemy, and since nearly all if not absolutely all of these GOP Senators claim to profess Trinitarian Christianity, they believe that God includes God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Ghost, so they blasphemed the Holy Ghost which Jesus Christ Himself said would not be forgiven, in this world or in the world to come. His words, in red ink.

Mugato: Let's set up a scoreboard for the number of commandments and seven deadly sins each candidate has broken.

Actually let's not bother.
And Beatitudes (100% red ink in a Red Letter Edition) that each has been the 180° diametric opposite of.

I've finally decided that your farkie is "Detailed explanations of why Republicans are anti-Christian." As someone who used to be Christian, who steeped himself in Christian doctrine, and who still holds a torch for Christianity long after I professed to stop actually believing in Christ, I always find your posts fascinating.

/its been more than 42 months since the inauguration and Trump's still in office, therefore he isn't the Beast


To put it another way, I'm a "Lieutenant Scheisskopf's Wife" atheist. The God I don't believe in is the kind, just God that is Jesus of Nazareth, and I am far more hostile to those who claim to follow Him but reject all of His teachings than I am to mere evil people who claim no greater authority than "might is right".
 
2020-08-06 3:34:25 AM  

Mithiwithi: COMALite J: The main way in Christianity to guarantee the loss of your soul even if you were "saved" is to Blaspheme the Holy Ghost.

You know, like 51 of the 53 Republican Senators did when they raised their right hands to the square with fingers pointed towards His Heavenly Throne, and swore, "so help me, God!" to render impartial justice ― an oath that those 51 had no intentions of keeping even at the time they swore the oath, because just weeks later they voted to not even hear witnesses or see evidence against Trump.

Swearing falsely in the name of God is a form of blasphemy, and since nearly all if not absolutely all of these GOP Senators claim to profess Trinitarian Christianity, they believe that God includes God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Ghost, so they blasphemed the Holy Ghost which Jesus Christ Himself said would not be forgiven, in this world or in the world to come. His words, in red ink.

Mugato: Let's set up a scoreboard for the number of commandments and seven deadly sins each candidate has broken.

Actually let's not bother.
And Beatitudes (100% red ink in a Red Letter Edition) that each has been the 180° diametric opposite of.

I've finally decided that your farkie is "Detailed explanations of why Republicans are anti-Christian." As someone who used to be Christian, who steeped himself in Christian doctrine, and who still holds a torch for Christianity long after I professed to stop actually believing in Christ, I always find your posts fascinating.

/its been more than 42 months since the inauguration and Trump's still in office, therefore he isn't the Beast

If that's in reference to the prophecies of Bands (or even typical Dispensationalist-style End Times prophecies), they say that the 42 months refers to only the first half of the Beast's reign. 42 months is 3½ yerars. The Tribulation is a total of seven years, of which the first ½ (3½ years, aka "a time, two times, and half a time" in the KJV) is the Tribulation proper, and the second is the far worse Great Tribulation.

Most End Times prophecies say that the Tribulation begins not with the onset of the reign of the Beast / "the Antichrist" (no such character in Revelation and no "the Antichrist" in the KJV at all), nor with "the Rapture" (another non-Biblical doctrine ― the word is found zero times in the Bible), but with the treaty between the Beast and Israel. A treaty-like agreement between Israel and Trump was done about ¾ year into his Presidency when he recognized Jerusalem instead of Tel Aviv as the capital city and announced that we'd be moving our embassy there.

With that in mind, the 3½ year mark would be about the time of the election. My own speculation is that Trump loses both the popular vote and the Electoral College allocation, yet refuses to resign. As some articles linked in PolTab have speculated, the GOP challenges the elections in some close states and denies their Electors, which is seen (not Constitutionally, but with the majority of the Supreme Court on his side, who's to say nay?) that that would deny either candidate a majority in the Electoral College which would send the election to the House where Trump would almost certainly win since it's one vote per State, not per Congressperson.

This would fulfill the bit where one of the heads of the Beast is wounded unto death, yet is miraculously healed to the astonishment of all.

Under the prophecies of Bands, Trump is not the Beast per se. There are three Beasts, and Trump would be the Little Horn of the Great Beast with the Mouth that Speaketh Blasphemies, and/or the Tenth Horn/King of the Scarlet-Coloured Beast.

Before I explain further, read the link where I recount how I encountered and conversed online with "Bands," who claimed to be one of the Two Witnesses.
 
2020-08-06 3:44:10 AM  
The War of Northern Politeness will be legendary.  Canada moving in to help a failed state.
 
2020-08-06 6:06:40 AM  
Would the Beast be such an inept moron? Or is that the genius of it?
 
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