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(Buzzfeed News)   If you try to hold me accountable, I might get you your vaccine a little slower. Wouldn't that be a shame?   (buzzfeednews.com) divider line
    More: Murica, Donald Trump, Operation Warp Speed, Human Services podcast, news stories, media scrutiny of his stock ownership, Spokesman Eli Zupnick, coronavirus vaccine, American people  
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3705 clicks; posted to Politics » on 04 Aug 2020 at 6:18 AM (7 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



54 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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2020-08-03 8:52:02 PM  
Sounds like someone needs an investigation
 
2020-08-03 9:00:47 PM  
Mafia Donald.
 
2020-08-03 9:10:43 PM  
I'm willing to wait.
 
2020-08-03 9:11:20 PM  
HHS assistant secretary Michael Caputo went even further, arguing the media doesn't want a vaccine to succeed before the election. "I believe that all the way in my aorta."

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-03 9:25:20 PM  
So now we're all hostages.

Spiffy.
 
2020-08-03 9:50:40 PM  

Squid_for_Brains: So now we're all hostages.

Spiffy.


That depends.

This guy is trying to extort us to not hold him accountable in exchange for getting a vaccine in a more timely manner.  But I, for one, have absolutely no confidence at all that he can deliver on the vaccine.

So, if your captor doesn't really have the ability to set you free, are you really his captive?
 
2020-08-03 9:53:14 PM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: Squid_for_Brains: So now we're all hostages.

Spiffy.

That depends.

This guy is trying to extort us to not hold him accountable in exchange for getting a vaccine in a more timely manner.  But I, for one, have absolutely no confidence at all that he can deliver on the vaccine.

So, if your captor doesn't really have the ability to set you free, are you really his captive?


Or does your captor exist?

Ooh! Existentialism!
 
2020-08-03 9:58:44 PM  

Badmoodman: HHS assistant secretary Michael Caputo went even further, arguing the media doesn't want a vaccine to succeed before the election. "I believe that all the way in my aorta."

[Fark user image 464x262] [View Full Size image _x_]


"Your aorta's in your chest."

"Good to know."
 
2020-08-03 10:12:11 PM  
The trials are slated for 24 months from the start--no sooner. Indeed, increased scrutiny will delay him dangerously rushing them to market untested and unsafely as a hail mary election stunt.
 
2020-08-03 10:17:30 PM  

ecmoRandomNumbers: Benevolent Misanthrope: Squid_for_Brains: So now we're all hostages.

Spiffy.

That depends.

This guy is trying to extort us to not hold him accountable in exchange for getting a vaccine in a more timely manner.  But I, for one, have absolutely no confidence at all that he can deliver on the vaccine.

So, if your captor doesn't really have the ability to set you free, are you really his captive?

Or does your captor exist?

Ooh! Existentialism!


And here we are back at Schrodinger's Douchebag.
 
2020-08-03 10:51:56 PM  
I try to avoid stereotypes, but this guy actually looks like someone who would try to hold a vaccine hostage.
 
2020-08-03 11:28:10 PM  

NotCodger: I try to avoid stereotypes, but this guy actually looks like someone who would try to hold a vaccine hostage.


thumbs.gfycat.comView Full Size
 
2020-08-04 2:57:45 AM  
I mean, obviously if Trump is still president when a vaccine is available, it'll be held up and un-distributed in the worst way possible.
 
2020-08-04 6:24:20 AM  
Sure...remember when we were in the throes of the Great Recession, and Mitch McConnell was focused on making Obama a one term president?
 
2020-08-04 6:25:29 AM  

koder: The trials are slated for 24 months from the start--no sooner. Indeed, increased scrutiny will delay him dangerously rushing them to market untested and unsafely as a hail mary election stunt.


Have you been paying the least bit of attention?  This clown has converted the entire executive branch to a personal fiefdom and absolute loyalty is required.  If he says aporove this now, it will be.
 
2020-08-04 6:31:40 AM  
But he wasn't busy enough to keep him from going on a podcast to whine about how he's so busy and everyone is so mean.
 
2020-08-04 6:38:51 AM  
Trump: ignores virus because it's only hitting blue states.
Same people: ponder the the other ways he can realistically use the pandemic to his advantage
Trump: Fake news!

Yep, seems about right.
 
2020-08-04 6:39:48 AM  
You're going to be out of a job in 5 months.  I doubt you'll be the one to deploy the vaccine even under optimal conditions.
 
2020-08-04 6:43:44 AM  
Yesterday:

"It is a given that Trump will announce that he personally has developed a vaccine right before the election. He will also have a threat that if he is not re-elected something might happen to the vaccine."
 
2020-08-04 6:47:00 AM  
Nice vaccine you got there. It'd be a shame if something... happened to it.
 
2020-08-04 6:48:45 AM  
Of course the Government push for the vaccine is the swampiest swamp.
 
2020-08-04 6:50:58 AM  
"Yes, I can rake in massive personal profits by allocating your tax money to certain companies in which I have a financial interest, but you don't need to worry about that. In fact, if you even think about the possibility that I might do something for my own selfish gain, you're trying to kill babies. You should be ashamed."
 
2020-08-04 6:55:31 AM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: Squid_for_Brains: So now we're all hostages.

Spiffy.

That depends.

This guy is trying to extort us to not hold him accountable in exchange for getting a vaccine in a more timely manner.  But I, for one, have absolutely no confidence at all that he can deliver on the vaccine.

So, if your captor doesn't really have the ability to set you free, are you really his captive?


Let's toss him in an oubliette forever and consider the bureaucratic implications of terminology when he's a skeleton and we all finally get vaccinated
 
2020-08-04 6:57:44 AM  
How?!

Is he personally in the lab working with the virus to develop the vaccine?
 
2020-08-04 7:05:32 AM  
The best people.
 
2020-08-04 7:14:01 AM  

A'isha P.: How?!

Is he personally in the lab working with the virus to develop the vaccine?


Because Trump thinks he is the end all be all. His word is law that all must follow.

We here in thre real world however just respond with a "sure, Jan", make a wanking motion, and pray for either Joe to win in November or the sweet sting of death to find President Toaddick.
 
2020-08-04 7:18:36 AM  
Wasn't this how that fascist guy got elected Chancellor in V for Vendetta?
 
2020-08-04 7:19:38 AM  
Right. Nobody wants to be safe - therefore media professionals and liberals throughout the USA are willing to risk the health of their families for politics.

Meanwhile, Kushner & Krew were actively trying to hold up progress on actual solutions to the pandemic because they thought it would affect Democratic regions and POC, mostly.

Corporate executives shouldn't join government unless they're willing to adhere to the culture.
 
2020-08-04 7:24:13 AM  
RasIanI: ...

Meanwhile, Kushner & Krew were actively trying to hold up progress on actual solutions to the pandemic because they thought it would affect Democratic regions and POC, mostly.

This, right here, was a war crime. I'm surprised that we don't hear more about it. They killed people based on their politics. They actually killed people.
 
2020-08-04 7:27:57 AM  
FTFAThe two men took extensive issue with news stories about Slaoui. He is working as a contractor voluntarily, drawing payment of only $1. As news reports have outlined, this exempts him from ethics rules that would apply to federal employees.

Cool, another wealthy Republican volunteer like Roger Stone and Paul Manafort. And those guys never steered us wrong.
 
2020-08-04 7:48:14 AM  

Scorpitron is reduced to a thin red paste: I mean, obviously if Trump is still president when a vaccine is available, it'll be held up and un-distributed in the worst way possible.


He will try to distribute saline injections a few weeks before the election in the hopes of a placebo effect, but he won't be able to help himself and will negotiate to ensure his friends get them and his critics don't because fark them, right?
 
2020-08-04 8:02:37 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-04 8:03:08 AM  
If RBG dying keeps you awake at night, imagine Trump being in charge of distributing a vaccine. We HAVE to vote in such large numbers that it's impossible to contest Biden's presidency.
 
2020-08-04 8:06:11 AM  
my mom said you cant have a vaccine!!!
 
2020-08-04 8:11:53 AM  
Maybe he could liquidate more of his kids' college funds to speed the vaccine as a sign of good faith.
 
2020-08-04 8:13:29 AM  

killershark: If RBG dying keeps you awake at night, imagine Trump being in charge of distributing a vaccine. We HAVE to vote in such large numbers that it's impossible to contest Biden's presidency.


Eh...can you push Biden a bit more on the whole DHS, ICE, PATRIOT Act thing before completely dedicating yourself to his re-election?
 
2020-08-04 8:19:33 AM  

killershark: If RBG dying keeps you awake at night, imagine Trump being in charge of distributing a vaccine. We HAVE to vote in such large numbers that it's impossible to contest Biden's presidency.


...we can't count on the election even being there in November anymore.  If "VOTE!" is all you got, then you've already lost.
 
2020-08-04 8:22:43 AM  
That just means they know the vaccine is delayed
 
2020-08-04 8:22:49 AM  

IlGreven: Badmoodman: HHS assistant secretary Michael Caputo went even further, arguing the media doesn't want a vaccine to succeed before the election. "I believe that all the way in my aorta."

[Fark user image 464x262] [View Full Size image _x_]

"Your aorta's in your chest."

"Good to know."


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-08-04 8:23:04 AM  

Snapper Carr: You're going to be out of a job in 5 months.  I doubt you'll be the one to deploy the vaccine even under optimal conditions.


And as a newly unemployed American, you get to wait at the END of the line, behind the millions of other unemployed Americans waiting for their dose.

Go ahead, and try to cut the queue.

Dare ya.
 
2020-08-04 8:27:35 AM  

misanthropicsob: Maybe he could liquidate more of his kids college funds to speed the vaccine as a sign of good faith.


Instructions unclear, tossed two kids in an industrial sized blender.
 
2020-08-04 8:29:35 AM  
Slowing the vaccine to specific someones is harm to the economy and stock market.
 
2020-08-04 8:29:52 AM  
He's not wrong. I don't want a vaccine before November 3rd. It's not possible for it to be properly tested by then. Mass producing and distributing an inadequately tested drug would be incredibly irresponsible and I fully expect it to happen.

That said, I don't see the big deal. A vaccine was going to be invented under Trump, Clinton, or Vermin Supreme. There's no universe in which everyone who could possibly invent a vaccine for this virus wasn't going to be working on it around the clock. Trump taking credit for a vaccine is pretty much Trump taking credit for the sun rising in the East. Nobody who doesn't already worship Trump is going to give him that credit.

Glaxo/Astra 2020!
 
2020-08-04 8:34:07 AM  

Koodz: He's not wrong. I don't want a vaccine before November 3rd. It's not possible for it to be properly tested by then. Mass producing and distributing an inadequately tested drug would be incredibly irresponsible and I fully expect it to happen.

That said, I don't see the big deal. A vaccine was going to be invented under Trump, Clinton, or Vermin Supreme. There's no universe in which everyone who could possibly invent a vaccine for this virus wasn't going to be working on it around the clock. Trump taking credit for a vaccine is pretty much Trump taking credit for the sun rising in the East. Nobody who doesn't already worship Trump is going to give him that credit.

Glaxo/Astra 2020!


Um we are in the universe where everyone who could be working on a vaccine, isn't.

Do you realize education and equipment costs money? And that long copyright terms spikes the cost of education while throttling useful info out of the public domain.

If you want to develop a vaccine, bare minimum, you need a hedge fund manager to deem your effort worthy like a medieval patron.
 
2020-08-04 8:45:52 AM  

Purple_Urkle: Koodz: He's not wrong. I don't want a vaccine before November 3rd. It's not possible for it to be properly tested by then. Mass producing and distributing an inadequately tested drug would be incredibly irresponsible and I fully expect it to happen.

That said, I don't see the big deal. A vaccine was going to be invented under Trump, Clinton, or Vermin Supreme. There's no universe in which everyone who could possibly invent a vaccine for this virus wasn't going to be working on it around the clock. Trump taking credit for a vaccine is pretty much Trump taking credit for the sun rising in the East. Nobody who doesn't already worship Trump is going to give him that credit.

Glaxo/Astra 2020!

Um we are in the universe where everyone who could be working on a vaccine, isn't.

Do you realize education and equipment costs money? And that long copyright terms spikes the cost of education while throttling useful info out of the public domain.

If you want to develop a vaccine, bare minimum, you need a hedge fund manager to deem your effort worthy like a medieval patron.


We're working from different definitions of "could." I wasn't talking about entities that lacked the resources.
 
2020-08-04 8:58:50 AM  
Pay Melania $377M to redecorate the west wing while you funnel the rest of our country's money to play golf at your crummy resorts rich guy.

There is nothing embarrassing left.  Oh, maybe find a way to steal money from a charity!  That will be a new gri...
Oh, that's been done now, too, huh?
 
2020-08-04 9:06:42 AM  
So you're admitting that you can't do the job? Excellent we'll have you replaced.
 
2020-08-04 9:25:05 AM  
Yeah, this motherfarker needs to go. Now.
 
2020-08-04 9:30:54 AM  
Say that's a nice White House you have there. Be a shame if anything happened to it(while you were inside). I wouldn't do anything like that but the second amendment people, maybe there is, I don't know.
 
2020-08-04 9:36:35 AM  
I think I speak for most of us when I say we would prefer Trump shut the fark up about speeding or slowing the release of the vaccine.  His stupidity and willing to subvert the nation's health to his political ambitions shouldn't even be the slightest consideration at to whether scientists have developed, tested and declared a vaccine safe enough to roll to the general population.
 
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