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(YouTube)   What can be more of a surprise than a simple fart resulting in you making diarrhea in your pants? A surprise 5 p.m. ET Trump Rose Garden press conference   (youtube.com) divider line
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1798 clicks; posted to Discussion » and Politics » on 14 Jul 2020 at 4:30 PM (4 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



1283 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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2020-07-14 1:57:45 PM  
Original Tweet:

 
2020-07-14 1:59:43 PM  
Executive Orderpalooza!

So a shiatshow
 
2020-07-14 2:01:20 PM  
Fauci is getting demoted to mailroom sweep up boy.
 
2020-07-14 2:05:26 PM  
Photo op with Alabama Coach Lou Saban.
 
2020-07-14 2:11:51 PM  
Either he threatens states to open schools or else, or it's Biden conspiracy theory Tuesday.
 
2020-07-14 2:12:51 PM  
INFRASTRUCTURE WEEK!!!!
 
2020-07-14 2:14:48 PM  
Keep Making America Open®
 
2020-07-14 2:15:54 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size


Love her air quotes.  That sarcasm should become standard.
 
2020-07-14 2:16:44 PM  
It'll be a 30 minute ramble trying to explain how someone else shiat his pants while he was wearing them.
 
2020-07-14 2:17:43 PM  
Maybe he wants to yell at people about Roger Stone?  I'm not sure what is too in his mind right now.
 
2020-07-14 2:18:00 PM  
MEIN PRESS SECRETARY!!! I CAN WALK!
 
2020-07-14 2:20:05 PM  
5pm shart -er- sharp, folks.
 
2020-07-14 2:20:15 PM  
If school boards are making decisions to open schools via zoom meetings how can you guarantee safe classrooms?

So are we calling the reopening of schools The third wave?
 
2020-07-14 2:28:04 PM  
Unless he is announcing his resignation and/or having been diagnosed with Covid I don't want to hear it.
 
2020-07-14 2:30:23 PM  

Circusdog320: If school boards are making decisions to open schools via zoom meetings how can you guarantee safe classrooms?

So are we calling the reopening of schools The third wave?


America will not have a third wave of covid-19, for pretty much the same reason we won't have a second wave.
 
2020-07-14 2:39:11 PM  
PEOPLES were MEAN to IVANKA TODAY.

All because she told people to buy another (unpaid) JOB!

PRESIDENTIAL (Family) HARASSMENT!

Wait, her assment... wait, her a...
 
2020-07-14 2:41:32 PM  
Budd Dwyer! Budd Dwyer! Budd Dwyer!
 
2020-07-14 2:43:49 PM  
Never trust a fart ..
 
2020-07-14 2:43:59 PM  

HallsOfMandos: Unless he is announcing his resignation and/or having been diagnosed with Covid I don't want to hear it.


whynotboth.jpg
 
2020-07-14 2:44:08 PM  
I'm gonna guess something about demanding the RNC be held in a specific place and will not be requiring masks, no matter what the locals have to say about it.
 
2020-07-14 2:44:14 PM  
Like, I'm curious what the hell he thinks he's going to announce and yet, at the same time I already know.

He's either going to shiat all over Fauci, and/or it's going to be more incoherent rambling.  There will be nothing of value.

You know, his rally was recently cancelled, I bet this is to make up for that.  He needs an ego stroking and thinks he can get it this way.
 
2020-07-14 2:44:18 PM  
I'm looking at myself reflections of my mind
It's just the kind of day to leave myself behind
So gently swaying through the fairyland of love
If you'll just come with me you'll see the beauty of
Tuesday afternoon
Tuesday afternoonIn the
In the
Rosegarden
Rosegarden funeral of sores
 
2020-07-14 2:44:39 PM  
TL:DW
media1.giphy.comView Full Size
 
2020-07-14 2:44:44 PM  
If he wants high ratings he should douse himself with gasoline then flick his Bic
 
2020-07-14 2:45:00 PM  
Alright what scandals we got on the docket?
-Stone Pardon
-Forcing schools open
-Federal takeover of liberal cities

What am I missing? Just one outrage after a farking other.
 
2020-07-14 2:45:29 PM  

sourballs: If he wants high ratings he should douse himself with gasoline then flick his Bic


pay per view. I'm in
 
2020-07-14 2:45:30 PM  

Purple_Urkle: Budd Dwyer! Budd Dwyer! Budd Dwyer!


Dwyer sacrificed himself for the good of his family. Trump would never intentionally do something which helps someone other than himself if it doesn't help him more, unless it involves paying off some of his debt to Putin.
 
2020-07-14 2:45:54 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size


There, I saved you the trouble.
 
2020-07-14 2:46:11 PM  
He's finally going to reveal his face without bronzer?

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-07-14 2:46:19 PM  
Anybody have a Bingo card set up yet?
 
2020-07-14 2:46:48 PM  
varsity.co.ukView Full Size
 
2020-07-14 2:47:04 PM  
So did the Stone paperwork get to the judge or not?  Perp walk him yet?  I bet it's going to be covering why he let a felon and traitor out without jail time.
 
2020-07-14 2:47:05 PM  
2nd guess: MAGA masks now on sale, call our 900 number to order!
 
2020-07-14 2:47:25 PM  

emersonbiggins: He's finally going to reveal his face without bronzer?

[Fark user image 850x340]


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-07-14 2:47:52 PM  
He's gonna fernt out a greasy waft of new tariffs, if I had to guess.
 
2020-07-14 2:48:08 PM  

emersonbiggins: He's finally going to reveal his face without bronzer?

[Fark user image image 850x340]


That's saved for his prison and court appearances. Hopefully they aren't delicate with him in the hallway either.
 
2020-07-14 2:48:12 PM  
More CEOs praising his bold and fearless leadership?
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-07-14 2:48:17 PM  
Ah, it's that bi-monthly spectacle of Trumpian Festivus, with the airing of grievances and demands for pity.

Fark off!  And I hope the pole remains lodged in your ass for the rest of the day, Trump.
 
2020-07-14 2:48:33 PM  
Purple_Urkle:

Hey Man, Nice Shot
Youtube xrGST3l7NV0
 
2020-07-14 2:48:37 PM  
He needs a game change.

He's going to announce Sarah Palin as his VP
 
2020-07-14 2:48:38 PM  
Please resign
 
2020-07-14 2:48:42 PM  
BIRF CERTIFICATE FOUND!!!!
 
2020-07-14 2:48:58 PM  
Resign or STFU
 
2020-07-14 2:48:59 PM  
My bet? Escalation of hostilities with China over the South China Sea.

What's sad is that someone really does need to do something about China's behavior there, but I don't Trump to do anything responsible about it. It's going to be a wag-the-dog situation so he gets to be a true "wartime President" or some bullshiat.
 
2020-07-14 2:49:07 PM  
I predict an executive order requiring schools to open this fall or lose federal funding.  That or he is getting another public blow job form the My Pillow guy.
 
2020-07-14 2:49:16 PM  
Over 55?  Never trust a fart.
 
2020-07-14 2:49:18 PM  

Jaws_Victim: Alright what scandals we got on the docket?
-Stone Pardon
-Forcing schools open
-Federal takeover of liberal cities

What am I missing? Just one outrage after a farking other.


California shutdown. I'm willing to bet he will have some rage about that.
 
2020-07-14 2:49:25 PM  
Is he going to whine about states wanting to close down again and they're hurting his feelings?
 
2020-07-14 2:49:28 PM  
It would be nice if they shut the country down again to stem the tide of Covid. But who am I kidding. That would require someone sensible.
 
2020-07-14 2:49:38 PM  
The election is cancelled.
 
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