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(Daily Mail)   Yes, there are five great white sharks swimming off the New York and Jersey coast, but experts warn that driving to the beach or spending time on the beach is riskier   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line
    More: PSA  
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1903 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Jul 2020 at 12:35 PM (3 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



29 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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2020-07-13 10:29:20 AM  
Dude, you can't call them "Great White Sharks" anymore, because Black Fish Matter.

The accepted term is Megalodon lemon shark.
 
2020-07-13 12:42:46 PM  
Be more worried about the Coney Island Whitefish
 
2020-07-13 12:44:23 PM  
All need now is piranhas in the Rio grande
 
2020-07-13 12:46:03 PM  
Because of Land Sharks with Candy Grams.  That's why.
 
2020-07-13 12:56:07 PM  
I wish one a them so called experts had been with us the black day the Uss Indianapolis went down. I can still hear their screams as I lay down to sleep
(Crush beer can)
 
2020-07-13 12:57:02 PM  
Don Lino prepares for the up and coming turf war with the new gang
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2020-07-13 12:58:06 PM  
Stop swimming in their kitchen if you're so worried.
 
2020-07-13 12:59:42 PM  
There's probably more than just 5. That said, we're not talking any new state of affairs here that hasn't been true since...literally forever, and there hasn't been a fatal shark attack in either state in 94 years it looks like. Not something I'd be worried about. Don't go paddling out into the surf laying on a board to give the visual impression of a seal to anything beneath you in the water if you're concerned.
 
2020-07-13 1:01:07 PM  
Five great white sharks
For shiatting birds
Three murder hornets
Two invasive fish
And a Karen in a Walmart.
 
2020-07-13 1:01:42 PM  
I can't stand the beach. I end up with sand on my things.
 
2020-07-13 1:07:27 PM  
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2020-07-13 1:09:36 PM  
FO subby.
 
2020-07-13 1:09:42 PM  
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2020-07-13 1:12:49 PM  
I don't worry about great white sharks. It's the mediocre white sharks that scare me.
 
2020-07-13 1:16:49 PM  
New Jersey, by the water?
You go in the water?
Shark's in the water?
Our shark.
Farewell and adieu to you, fair Spanish ladies. Farewell and adieu, you ladies of Spain. For we've received orders for to sail back to Boston. And so nevermore shall we see you again.
 
2020-07-13 1:23:02 PM  
In New York?  Your more likely to be bitten by a New Yorker (Third item).
 
2020-07-13 1:34:12 PM  
Where were they back in April when there was a surplus of bodies?  (Too soon?)
 
2020-07-13 2:01:53 PM  

zbtop: There's probably more than just 5. That said, we're not talking any new state of affairs here that hasn't been true since...literally forever, and there hasn't been a fatal shark attack in either state in 94 years it looks like. Not something I'd be worried about. Don't go paddling out into the surf laying on a board to give the visual impression of a seal to anything beneath you in the water if you're concerned.


Ahem - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_T​ria​ngle_(Pacific_Ocean)
 
2020-07-13 2:02:45 PM  
There was a bull shark spotted near Long Beach Island last week. I'm more worried about them.
 
2020-07-13 2:05:11 PM  

Marcos P: There was a bull shark spotted near Long Beach Island last week. I'm more worried about them.


With good reason - they're far more likely to be the culprit in an attack, and they're known to end up miles inland up rivers in what's typically considered "fresh" water
 
2020-07-13 2:07:34 PM  
Oh shiat. Every time the media starts talking about sharks something really, really bad happens.
 
2020-07-13 2:20:06 PM  

Yellow Beard: I don't worry about great white sharks. It's the mediocre white sharks that scare me.


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2020-07-13 2:32:01 PM  
There are commonly Great White Sharks off the coast of NY and NJ.
There are almost no attacks.
The theory is that they do not feed in cold water, because that is where they give birth and sharks are cannibalistic.
The book and movie Jaws were written after several shark attacks in NJ, but none were believed to be Great White Sharks.

/Most Great White attacks are in California waters.
//Over half of all shark attacks on the planet are in Florida waters.
 
2020-07-13 2:58:35 PM  

Straight Outta Hate: There are commonly Great White Sharks off the coast of NY and NJ.
There are almost no attacks.
The theory is that they do not feed in cold water, because that is where they give birth and sharks are cannibalistic.
The book and movie Jaws were written after several shark attacks in NJ, but none were believed to be Great White Sharks.

/Most Great White attacks are in California waters.
//Over half of all shark attacks on the planet are in Florida waters.


With a little common (not-so-common, these days) sense, most shark attacks are entirely avoidable.
- Don't wade or swim in low light conditions, particularly in low-visibility water.
- Don't carry a lot of metal when you swim, especially high-conductivity metal. (bracelets, coins,etc)
- Don't swim alone
- Don't swim if you're bleeding.
- Avoid active fishing areas.

Sharks actually don't like eating people.  We're not even on the menu.  Most shark attacks are because someone startled a shark, like stepping on it, or kicking it by accident.  Almost never is it because they hunted for humans.  (Bull shark excluded, those things just eat anything they can get their mouth around)

I'll skip the commentary on that farking stupid practice of shark finning for now.
 
2020-07-13 3:38:06 PM  
I wouldn't be surprised. They apparently found a great white breeding ground off the eastern forks of Long Island a few years ago.
 
2020-07-13 5:26:52 PM  

waxbeans: All need now is piranhas in the Rio grande


Well they're not as bite-y, but coyotes have been known to frequent the area.
 
2020-07-13 5:33:23 PM  

joepennerlives: waxbeans: All need now is piranhas in the Rio grande

Well they're not as bite-y, but coyotes have been known to frequent the area.


Hum, well, hopefully, they don't become plague infected coyotes.
 
2020-07-13 6:35:19 PM  

Straight Outta Hate: There are commonly Great White Sharks off the coast of NY and NJ.
There are almost no attacks.
The theory is that they do not feed in cold water, because that is where they give birth and sharks are cannibalistic.
The book and movie Jaws were written after several shark attacks in NJ, but none were believed to be Great White Sharks.

/Most Great White attacks are in California waters.
//Over half of all shark attacks on the planet are in Florida waters.


Northern California waters are very cold, and there are recorded Great White attacks there.
 
2020-07-13 7:08:18 PM  
Fun (?) fact: the first recording fatal shark attack in (pre-) US waters in 1644 gave Spuyten Duyvil, where the Harlem River separates Manhattan and The Bronx, its name.  The culprit is thought to have been a Bull shark.

Nonetheless, I like to refer to my penis by this name.
 
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