Skip to content
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Guardian)   What will big cinema look like after the Covid-19 lockdown is relaxed? Besides being obviously more expensive   (theguardian.com) divider line
    More: Interesting, Film, Movie theater, actual new movies, big cinema chains, Disney's lavish live-action remake, much money, last-minute testing of the waters, high-profile movies  
•       •       •

571 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 05 Jul 2020 at 6:20 AM (5 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



20 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2020-07-05 6:50:22 AM  
Could we maybe consider delaying the woke!Disney mansplaining version of Mulan where they try to force every line of dialogue in a '90s move where one of the jokes was that the dragon spoke in jive instead of koans and the entire foundation of the movie was cross-dressing jokes through a Politically-Correct-As-Envisioned-By-A​-Focus-Group-Of-Fifty-Year-Old-White-M​ale-Marketing-Executives filter until... never?

Like, could we just never get one of these cringe-inducing pieces of shiat about how that thing you liked as a kid is "problematic" if you analyze it with a level of reductionist idiocy that requires willfully misinterpreting the farking bonds of the individual atoms, ever?  Pretty please?

// It's telling that Disney farked up Star Wars and I'm just like "well, that sucked, I wonder what the next Marvel film will be like", but the fake-wokeness internet pandering remakes genuinely make me angry.  These farking trashfires are not landing the way they think they're farking landing, one initial success aside.
 
2020-07-05 7:39:11 AM  
Don't know, won't be going ....well nothing to do with virus, I think last movie I saw at theatre was that Rambo Comes Home flick, enjoyed it, lots of flying body parts.    That's not including kid flicks I brought my grand-kids to, Caroline was awesome.
 
2020-07-05 8:16:31 AM  
Just when I was in talks with a major studio. The whole world's against me, I swear to God.

weirdneighbour: , I think last movie I saw at theatre was that Rambo Comes Home flick,


Home Alone with a 70 year old instead of a kid.
 
2020-07-05 8:24:09 AM  

Mugato: Home Alone with a 70 year old instead of a kid.


I liked it the first time I saw it, when it was called "Skyfall"
 
2020-07-05 8:24:31 AM  
The Alamo Drafthouse is saying that because they'll only seat every other seat, there will be a $20 minimum food purchase requirement. I've generally got no problem with that, getting a pizza and beer there costs that anyway.

\although occasionally I just want their fried pickles
 
2020-07-05 8:44:36 AM  
Drive ins were great - I missed them.
Time to bring them back?
 
2020-07-05 9:09:54 AM  
FTA: In ordinary times, both Mulan and Tenet would be potential billion-dollar earners at the global box office.

If the author isn't going to take the article seriously, why should I?
 
2020-07-05 9:57:32 AM  

Jim_Callahan: Could we maybe consider delaying the woke!Disney mansplaining version of Mulan where they try to force every line of dialogue in a '90s move where one of the jokes was that the dragon spoke in jive instead of koans and the entire foundation of the movie was cross-dressing jokes through a Politically-Correct-As-Envisioned-By-A​-Focus-Group-Of-Fifty-Year-Old-White-M​ale-Marketing-Executives filter until... never?

Like, could we just never get one of these cringe-inducing pieces of shiat about how that thing you liked as a kid is "problematic" if you analyze it with a level of reductionist idiocy that requires willfully misinterpreting the farking bonds of the individual atoms, ever?  Pretty please?

// It's telling that Disney farked up Star Wars and I'm just like "well, that sucked, I wonder what the next Marvel film will be like", but the fake-wokeness internet pandering remakes genuinely make me angry.  These farking trashfires are not landing the way they think they're farking landing, one initial success aside.


Don't worry. 50 years from now people will be seeing movies that would send today's moviegoers crying to their safe space.  Woke will be considered something to laugh at in the same way we look at censorship from the past. Like the sex scenes removed from movies in order to get an R rating which would now be something you see on basic cable.  What no generation seems to understand is that morals are not some concrete item. They change and flow with every culture and generation.  And 50 years from now kids will be giggling at aunt Karen getting in a huff over some horribly offensive thing in a cartoon they are watching.
 
2020-07-05 9:59:57 AM  

jso2897: Drive ins were great - I missed them.
Time to bring them back?


I keep seeing on facebook that Wal-Mart is turning parking lots at 150 of their stores into drive-ins.
 
2020-07-05 11:03:34 AM  

weirdneighbour: Don't know, won't be going ....well nothing to do with virus, I think last movie I saw at theatre was that Rambo Comes Home flick, enjoyed it, lots of flying body parts.    That's not including kid flicks I brought my grand-kids to, Caroline was awesome.


Coraline?
 
2020-07-05 11:12:29 AM  

Wendigogo: weirdneighbour: Don't know, won't be going ....well nothing to do with virus, I think last movie I saw at theatre was that Rambo Comes Home flick, enjoyed it, lots of flying body parts.    That's not including kid flicks I brought my grand-kids to, Caroline was awesome.

Coraline?


cultsirens.comView Full Size

Nope, Caroline. Despite her sexpot image, most of the films she was in were technically kids' movies.
 
2020-07-05 12:25:29 PM  

EdgeRunner: Wendigogo: weirdneighbour: Don't know, won't be going ....well nothing to do with virus, I think last movie I saw at theatre was that Rambo Comes Home flick, enjoyed it, lots of flying body parts.    That's not including kid flicks I brought my grand-kids to, Caroline was awesome.

Coraline?

[cultsirens.com image 736x1072]
Nope, Caroline. Despite her sexpot image, most of the films she was in were technically kids' movies.


Ah. Never heard of her, so first thought was an actual more recent kids movie.
 
2020-07-05 12:31:39 PM  

jso2897: Drive ins were great - I missed them.
Time to bring them back?


I went to one Friday night, they had a huge fireworks show followed by showing Independence Day. It was awesome.
 
2020-07-05 12:48:28 PM  

Wendigogo: EdgeRunner: Wendigogo: weirdneighbour: Don't know, won't be going ....well nothing to do with virus, I think last movie I saw at theatre was that Rambo Comes Home flick, enjoyed it, lots of flying body parts.    That's not including kid flicks I brought my grand-kids to, Caroline was awesome.

Coraline?

[cultsirens.com image 736x1072]
Nope, Caroline. Despite her sexpot image, most of the films she was in were technically kids' movies.

Ah. Never heard of her, so first thought was an actual more recent kids movie.


Kids in the 70s got much more interesting options than Disney cartoons and movies based on videogames.

i.pinimg.comView Full Size
 
2020-07-05 2:49:16 PM  
Before the Coronavirus, people at the theater were doing shiatty stuff like talking on their smartphone or surfing the web during the movie; or talking to other people in the theater; making way too much noise; or occasionally taking other people's assigned seats, then having to move when people showed up for that seat.

No way in hell I'll be going back to the theaters soon, if I have to trust other people to behave responsibly regarding Coronavirus guidelines. At this point, I'm happy to watch films at home.
 
2020-07-05 2:54:05 PM  

Wendigogo: EdgeRunner: Wendigogo: weirdneighbour: Don't know, won't be going ....well nothing to do with virus, I think last movie I saw at theatre was that Rambo Comes Home flick, enjoyed it, lots of flying body parts.    That's not including kid flicks I brought my grand-kids to, Caroline was awesome.

Coraline?

[cultsirens.com image 736x1072]
Nope, Caroline. Despite her sexpot image, most of the films she was in were technically kids' movies.

Ah. Never heard of her, so first thought was an actual more recent kids movie.


Yes, the movie 'Coraline'  animated feature, sorry about mix-up
 
2020-07-05 6:30:16 PM  

Noah_Tall: Jim_Callahan: Could we maybe consider delaying the woke!Disney mansplaining version of Mulan where they try to force every line of dialogue in a '90s move where one of the jokes was that the dragon spoke in jive instead of koans and the entire foundation of the movie was cross-dressing jokes through a Politically-Correct-As-Envisioned-By-A​-Focus-Group-Of-Fifty-Year-Old-White-M​ale-Marketing-Executives filter until... never?

Like, could we just never get one of these cringe-inducing pieces of shiat about how that thing you liked as a kid is "problematic" if you analyze it with a level of reductionist idiocy that requires willfully misinterpreting the farking bonds of the individual atoms, ever?  Pretty please?

// It's telling that Disney farked up Star Wars and I'm just like "well, that sucked, I wonder what the next Marvel film will be like", but the fake-wokeness internet pandering remakes genuinely make me angry.  These farking trashfires are not landing the way they think they're farking landing, one initial success aside.

Don't worry. 50 years from now people will be seeing movies that would send today's moviegoers crying to their safe space.  Woke will be considered something to laugh at in the same way we look at censorship from the past. Like the sex scenes removed from movies in order to get an R rating which would now be something you see on basic cable.  What no generation seems to understand is that morals are not some concrete item. They change and flow with every culture and generation.  And 50 years from now kids will be giggling at aunt Karen getting in a huff over some horribly offensive thing in a cartoon they are watching.


I don't want to live in a world where Karen's are 130 years old.
 
2020-07-05 9:48:10 PM  
I've wondered why the major movie theaters haven't put screens up in their parking lots? The lots are massive anyways and should hold about as many people as their traditional screen setup. They could still have multiple screens because the lots are generally so large. They have the ticketing and concession infrastructure and distribution deals with movie studios. There's less variable costs (no a/c). It'd generate cash flow to reduce their chance of bankruptcy. I don't really see any downside.

The rooftop cinema in town has transitioned to drive in at a different location and is sold out every night!
 
2020-07-05 11:22:21 PM  

The Ocho: I've wondered why the major movie theaters haven't put screens up in their parking lots? The lots are massive anyways and should hold about as many people as their traditional screen setup. They could still have multiple screens because the lots are generally so large. They have the ticketing and concession infrastructure and distribution deals with movie studios. There's less variable costs (no a/c). It'd generate cash flow to reduce their chance of bankruptcy. I don't really see any downside.

The rooftop cinema in town has transitioned to drive in at a different location and is sold out every night!


Because traditional theaters don't have FM transmitters to broadcast to cars.  And if they had speakers loud enough to be heard throughout the parking lot then they could only show one movie because they would drown each other out.  And they could show only pg movies at the most.
 
2020-07-06 12:04:17 AM  

Noah_Tall: The Ocho: I've wondered why the major movie theaters haven't put screens up in their parking lots? The lots are massive anyways and should hold about as many people as their traditional screen setup. They could still have multiple screens because the lots are generally so large. They have the ticketing and concession infrastructure and distribution deals with movie studios. There's less variable costs (no a/c). It'd generate cash flow to reduce their chance of bankruptcy. I don't really see any downside.

The rooftop cinema in town has transitioned to drive in at a different location and is sold out every night!

Because traditional theaters don't have FM transmitters to broadcast to cars.  And if they had speakers loud enough to be heard throughout the parking lot then they could only show one movie because they would drown each other out.  And they could show only pg movies at the most.


FM transmitters are only about 300 bucks or less. Plenty of churches have been able to afford them for parking lot services. I'm pretty sure the theaters could manage the cost as well, especially the major chains who could get bulk rate prices.
 
Displayed 20 of 20 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking




On Twitter



  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.