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(Twitter Donald Trump)   If we just stopped all the testing, nobody would be sick   (twitter.com) divider line
    More: Dumbass, shot  
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3568 clicks; posted to Politics » on 04 Jul 2020 at 10:20 PM (16 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

 
2020-07-04 4:56:32 PM  
135 votes:
"If only I didn't take that damn pregnancy test!"

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2020-07-04 6:55:35 PM  
115 votes:
i.imgflip.comView Full Size
 
2020-07-04 5:06:06 PM  
95 votes:
Cases, Cases, Cases!

wompampsupport.azureedge.netView Full Size
 
2020-07-04 10:32:38 PM  
40 votes:
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2020-07-04 10:32:21 PM  
40 votes:

cretinbob: [Fark user image 425x608]


I am SO sick of this nonsense.

He didn't tell people to drink bleach, he told people to inject disinfectant into their veins. You liebruls just can't stop lying about our Great President's wins that we are now tired of having!
 
2020-07-04 10:32:14 PM  
34 votes:
Remember when Obama said that if we left bin Laden alone he'd die anyways?
 
2020-07-04 10:30:56 PM  
22 votes:
Fark user imageView Full Size


/ hahaha later down the thread
 
2020-07-04 10:26:47 PM  
17 votes:
Sir, Arby's is closed due to several staff members testing positive after a customer visited and refused to wear a mask or leave.
 
2020-07-04 5:40:40 PM  
16 votes:
Clearly trump never took any tests at Wharton
 
2020-07-04 4:42:02 PM  
15 votes:
And if you don't take a pregnancy test, you'll never be pregnant!
 
2020-07-04 10:38:00 PM  
14 votes:
I feel like I'm playing Call of Cthulu every time I read one of his tweets and I have to make a sanity check.
 
2020-07-04 10:29:47 PM  
13 votes:
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2020-07-04 5:42:01 PM  
13 votes:
Bear in mind he probably applies the same logic to STIs
 
2020-07-04 10:51:09 PM  
8 votes:

thisispete: [Fark user image 850x604]


New Zealand is a rowboat full of potatoes?
 
2020-07-04 4:43:33 PM  
8 votes:
We know he never took an IQ test, because he is not intelligent.
 
2020-07-04 4:30:42 PM  
8 votes:
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2020-07-04 11:14:55 PM  
7 votes:

mrshowrules: [i.imgflip.com image 600x488]


This is a picture of my friend Becky. She used to be a happy, popular girl until one night she snorted a pregnancy test at a party. She died instantly. Please, don't do pregnancy tests. It's the most dangerous test out there. Please don't wind up like Becky.
 
2020-07-04 10:39:19 PM  
7 votes:
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2020-07-04 10:34:56 PM  
7 votes:
What if syphilis protects against corona virus?
 
2020-07-04 4:48:28 PM  
7 votes:
Thank God we're not testing people for smallpox!  Can you imagine what that would be like?
 
2020-07-04 11:21:41 PM  
6 votes:

ababyatemydingo: And if you don't take a pregnancy test, you'll never be pregnant!


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2020-07-04 8:39:00 PM  
6 votes:
See, the testing that he didn't want to do, is driving America's numbers up, and that's why we're Number One.

Number One! Number One! Number One!
 
2020-07-04 6:05:23 PM  
6 votes:

swaniefrmreddeer: Yeah, no, we're currently testing at less than 0.5% positive, testing doesn't find something that isn't there. When there places getting 20%+ positive rates, they're only identifying a small percentage of the actual cases. We got here by listening to the experts, social distancing properly, testing and contact tracing.


science wurds...ugg. shut up nerd.
 
2020-07-04 10:48:22 PM  
5 votes:

Godscrack: Yeah. That isn't Trump writing his Tweets.


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2020-07-04 10:30:10 PM  
5 votes:
I would post the 'that's not how any of this works' meme but the old ladies should be quarantined.
 
2020-07-05 12:35:14 AM  
4 votes:
Last week, when asked if Donald was going to wear a mask, McAninny said that he didn't need to because he's tested every day.  So testing actually prevents the disease if you're the president.  But it causes the disease in everybody else.  Nobody can figure out how the virus knows who the president is or why the virus is giving him a break.
 
2020-07-04 10:42:22 PM  
4 votes:

Crocoduck: Two Scoop's line of reasoning makes me think of those who have law degrees from Sovereign Citizen University.


You do not have rejoinder! I know my rites!
 
2020-07-04 11:58:10 PM  
3 votes:
Nero ("black" in latin) trolled while Rome burned.  Blamed it on the Chinese Christians or the Chinese Christians.   Went on to rebuild Rome and found a thousand year empire which lasted until the end of the month when the unemployment/work lure subsidies ran out.
 
amb [TotalFark]
2020-07-04 11:31:48 PM  
3 votes:

GypsyJoker: mrshowrules: [i.imgflip.com image 600x488]

This is a picture of my friend Becky. She used to be a happy, popular girl until one night she snorted a pregnancy test at a party. She died instantly. Please, don't do pregnancy tests. It's the most dangerous test out there. Please don't wind up like Becky.


I'm pretty sure that is Taylor Swift.
 
2020-07-04 11:22:13 PM  
3 votes:
Don't kill me, but I don't think he's saying we need to stop testing to make the numbers better. He's boasting about how awesome our testing is and how other places that don't have the numbers we have probably aren't testing as good as us.
 
2020-07-04 10:28:25 PM  
3 votes:

Original: Original Tweet:

realDonaldTrump: Cases, Cases, Cases! If we didn't test so much and so successfully, we would have very few cases. If you test 40,000,000 people, you are going to have many cases that, without the testing (like other countries), would not show up every night on the Fake Evening News.....


He's a farking idiot. That's like saying if you don't report crimes, they didn't happen.

Oh. Wait.
 
2020-07-05 12:58:37 AM  
2 votes:

WithinReason: mrshowrules: [i.imgflip.com image 600x488]

I'm pretty sure that's Taylor Swift.


No it's Becky.
 
2020-07-04 11:18:48 PM  
2 votes:

i ignore u: thisispete: [Fark user image 850x604]

New Zealand is a rowboat full of potatoes?


Kiwi birds, which do indeed have an uncanny resemblance to potatoes
 
2020-07-04 11:01:10 PM  
2 votes:
What's with the five dots shiat?  My ex wife uses five dots like some sort of exclamated ellipsis. Sometimes, when she gets really worked up in a borderline lather, it's seven dots. Never six. Never four. I've never seen her use a regular ellipsis. Any forensic punctuologists out there who can explain this?
 
2020-07-04 10:33:48 PM  
2 votes:
Guys. This is obviously sarcasm.

/at least some talking head said that after the second time he repeated this insanity
 
2020-07-04 10:30:08 PM  
2 votes:
Strange how some of the hospitals near me are filling up... must be psychosomatic caused by the testing.
 
2020-07-04 7:06:26 PM  
2 votes:
All this testing embarrasses Donny because it completely contradicts his statements. If you would, please cut it out
 
2020-07-04 6:25:49 PM  
2 votes:
Fark him.  If there's any hope, there is an old man who loves down from my ex that had a Trump sign up.  It's down now.  Hopefully the tide is turning.
 
2020-07-05 10:05:01 AM  
1 vote:

Abacus9: jaylectricity: Actually, no...I guess I could have let it be since the fark filters deleted the five other exclamation points I would have posted.

That's the funny part!!!!!!


You bastard!
 
2020-07-05 8:39:05 AM  
1 vote:
If we stopped monitoring the southern border there would be no illegal immigration.
 
2020-07-05 1:58:48 AM  
1 vote:

Chariset: Jack Sabbath: Can SOMEONE from the media please point that out to this farking Dotard?!

You have to try to see it from inside his orange fishbowl.

The only true victim of COVID-19 is Trump.  He was set to coast into a second term on his roaring economy and then people mentioned COVID.  And then they started testing and found COVID in the US and the market plummeted and everyone freaked out.

He does not care about any of the people who have suffered or died of COVID-19.  He cares that people started looking for it here, and they found it, and the stock market went down.  And to his pudding brain, if they had never tested, or never tested so widely, there'd only be fifteen cases in the States and things would have been fine.


Also, remember Trump has zero concept of reality as we know it. He literally does not realize or understand that people are dying of this, or suffering terribly. Even if you took him to an ICU and he saw people gasping for air or on ventilators, he simply cannot understand that those are people, like himself, breathing their last.

His only reality is what touches him, personally; and by "touches" I mean that in the most literal sense. He has no object permanence. When he leaves a room, things stop existing in that room.
 
2020-07-05 1:45:27 AM  
1 vote:
Actually, no...I guess I could have let it be since the fark filters deleted the five other exclamation points I would have posted.
 
2020-07-05 1:14:29 AM  
1 vote:

amb: GypsyJoker: mrshowrules: [i.imgflip.com image 600x488]

This is a picture of my friend Becky. She used to be a happy, popular girl until one night she snorted a pregnancy test at a party. She died instantly. Please, don't do pregnancy tests. It's the most dangerous test out there. Please don't wind up like Becky.

I'm pretty sure that is Taylor Swift.


no, its Becky
 
2020-07-05 12:22:38 AM  
1 vote:

Unobtanium: Cases, Cases, Cases!

[wompampsupport.azureedge.net image 700x394]


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/I just had to
 
2020-07-05 12:18:47 AM  
1 vote:
I see Trump probably failed "object permanence", just like my dog.
 
2020-07-05 12:14:03 AM  
1 vote:

Hickory-smoked: KiwDaWabbit: When he said this a couple of weeks ago, it was "sarcasm". What is it now that he has repeated it several times? His idea of a complete stand-up routine?

It was his press secretary and other sycophants who said it was a joke. When asked directly, he said "I never kid."


So, it would just be a Laurel and Hardy style routine.
 
2020-07-05 12:05:31 AM  
1 vote:

thisispete: [Fark user image image 850x604]


Oh, they're supposed to be kiwis! I thought they were potatoes.
 
2020-07-04 11:52:53 PM  
1 vote:

Smirky the Wonder Chimp: cretinbob: [Fark user image image 425x608]

All that's missing is a "You're welcome."


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2020-07-04 11:49:23 PM  
1 vote:
Paraphrasing from a tweet that I can't seem to find again:

"If you stopped checking immigration status, we'd have no more illegal immigrants."
=Smidge=
 
2020-07-04 11:27:15 PM  
1 vote:

Catlenfell: I'm curious. Is he stupid enough to believe that is the case? Or, does he think he smart enough to pull a fast one on the American people?

I assume the former.


He must think the test gives them the Covid. So if you don't test, you don't get it or have it.
 
2020-07-04 11:23:26 PM  
1 vote:
Fark user imageView Full Size

Chocolate! Chocolate! Chocolate!

Guess this is what we're doing now.

/Why doesn't that farkstick just resign?
 
2020-07-04 10:53:03 PM  
1 vote:

Scorpitron is reduced to a thin red paste: Harry Freakstorm: Remember when Obama said that if we left bin Laden alone he'd die anyways?

I do remember Bush saying he no longer cared about him.

Hmmm... Republicans...


*shakes tiny fist*
 
2020-07-04 10:51:13 PM  
1 vote:

Ray_Finkle: luckyeddie: That is, quite possibly, the most stupid thing I have ever read.

The most stupid thing you've read so far!

Give him another week, I'm sure he can top this


Plus...you've been on the poltab before, Eddie, right? Not even including the trolls. I've seen some shiat. I've seen some shiat that will make your hair go white.
 
2020-07-04 10:42:29 PM  
1 vote:
The only thing that makes it seem like we don't have the pandemic under control is all the evidence.
 
2020-07-04 10:41:15 PM  
1 vote:

mjjt: [Fark user image image 850x912]


Do we have any corroboration that he's been testing? It make 100% sense that the President would be...normally, but I can easily see him refusing (because he's a little biatch).

/plus I reaally hope he catches it
 
2020-07-04 10:33:52 PM  
1 vote:

Scorpitron is reduced to a thin red paste: We have the president of the United States actively pitching no testing during a massive pandemic.


If you Americans just stopped breathing for two weeks, you'd all be fine.
 
2020-07-04 10:32:34 PM  
1 vote:

bobug: mjjt: [Fark user image 850x912]

I have to say... Imagining him getting a nasal swab every day, leaving his eyes watering, amuses me more than it should.


Here's hoping whoever is administering it isn't gentle.  Gotta be thorough when it's the President*, you know.

And maybe sneezes at juuust the wrong time.
 
2020-07-04 10:23:49 PM  
1 vote:

Original: Original Tweet:

[iFrame https://platform.twitter.com/embed/ind​ex.html?dnt=false&embedId=twitter-widg​et-1&frame=false&hideCard=false&hideTh​read=false&id=1279487627977252864&lang​=en&origin=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.fark.com%​2Fcomments%2F10870898%2FIf-we-just-sto​pped-all-testing-nobody-would-be-sick&​siteScreenName=fark&theme=light&widget​sVersion=9066bb2%3A1593540614199&width​=550px]


This guy makes Scott Steiner's math promo sound like the "I have a dream" speech.
 
2020-07-04 9:34:43 PM  
1 vote:
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2020-07-04 8:49:19 PM  
1 vote:

bluorangefyre: Fark him.  If there's any hope, there is an old man who loves down from my ex that had a Trump sign up.  It's down now.  Hopefully the tide is turning.


The guy across the street removed the Trump stickers from his car. So🤞
 
2020-07-04 6:47:44 PM  
1 vote:
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2020-07-04 6:23:59 PM  
1 vote:

NateAsbestos: swaniefrmreddeer: Yeah, no, we're currently testing at less than 0.5% positive, testing doesn't find something that isn't there. When there places getting 20%+ positive rates, they're only identifying a small percentage of the actual cases. We got here by listening to the experts, social distancing properly, testing and contact tracing.

"We"? Who's testing 0.5% positive? Must not be in the states...


I'm in Alberta, we're averaging about 40 positive cases with 8000 tests a day currently and have enough contact tracers to keep it under control.
 
2020-07-04 6:13:49 PM  
1 vote:
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2020-07-04 6:03:33 PM  
1 vote:

swaniefrmreddeer: Yeah, no, we're currently testing at less than 0.5% positive, testing doesn't find something that isn't there. When there places getting 20%+ positive rates, they're only identifying a small percentage of the actual cases. We got here by listening to the experts, social distancing properly, testing and contact tracing.


"We"? Who's testing 0.5% positive? Must not be in the states...
 
2020-07-04 4:42:39 PM  
1 vote:
Think anyone told him that the people you can't tell are sick can make people who CAN tell, sick?

Supernatural O Death - Jen Titus
Youtube u1EzU9sLQ6I
 
2020-07-04 4:40:56 PM  
1 vote:
What?
 
2020-07-04 4:40:55 PM  
1 vote:
Yeah. That isn't Trump writing his Tweets.
 
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