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(MSNBC)   Russians are paying bounties to kill US and NATO forces and the White House is mad about it. Not that they're doing it, but that it was reported. Come discuss Putin's Puppet, Traitor Trump, in Monday's MSNBC discussion thread - start 8 PM ET   (msnbc.com) divider line
    More: Live, President of the United States, Donald Trump, Donald Trump's CFPB director, Ivana Trump, Fred Trump, Supreme Court of the United States, Trump's rally, Trump campaign  
•       •       •

170 clicks; posted to Discussion » on 29 Jun 2020 at 7:30 PM (13 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

 
2020-06-29 4:33:01 PM  
26 votes:
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2020-06-29 8:26:45 PM  
24 votes:
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2020-06-29 8:36:38 PM  
15 votes:
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2020-06-30 12:31:42 AM  
14 votes:
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/I'm going to need you to watch this
 
2020-06-29 6:02:27 PM  
14 votes:
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2020-06-29 6:28:21 PM  
11 votes:
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2020-06-30 12:04:48 PM  
10 votes:

Dallymo: Mr. Dallymo has a minor hand surgery today


Just take him out behind the barn and shoot him.

If you don't have a barn, set up a paypal. We'll find one. Got ya covered.

/sorry.
 
2020-06-29 7:09:56 PM  
10 votes:
Fark user image
 
2020-06-29 4:31:36 PM  
10 votes:
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No breathe on birdie.
 
2020-06-29 9:29:48 PM  
9 votes:
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2020-06-29 8:54:40 PM  
9 votes:
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2020-06-29 9:10:57 PM  
8 votes:

JulieAzel626: Always

A

Tweet

https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/st​atus/517045156826988544?s=20


I liked this follow up

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-06-29 8:47:06 PM  
8 votes:

Markoff_Cheney: I feel like a bike ride tonight.
I want to go shoot the Buddhist temple down the street again.
Will report back.


Are we not doing phrasing anymore?
 
2020-06-29 7:56:34 PM  
8 votes:

Cornelis de Gyselaer: I hereby demand that I be given a Fark account: Johnny the Tackling Alzheimers Patient: For a change of pace, some classical music:

For certain definitions of "classical" and "music"


\ Damn, PDQ Bach would have been a great username.

Make an Alt


I already have "I hereby demand that I be given a longer Fark account" in mind.
 
2020-06-29 7:41:51 PM  
8 votes:
Went online t-shirt shopping today. I liked this one but would have preferred it in an ugly sweater...

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-06-29 6:48:01 PM  
7 votes:

EighthDay: clodcomplex: [Fark user image image 598x129]
/guess who just figured out that he might not be able to prop up the economy all the way to the election

These assholes should have been saying this since March, if not earlier. And if there was a PPE shortage, there were ways they could have handled that that Traitor trump opted to not use

Farksticks, all of them


It's still just a blue state problem, but the blue states it's a problem in now include Florida, Texas, and Arizona.
 
2020-06-29 5:37:32 PM  
7 votes:

badtrotsky013: I had food. Rest of my sub and some pickle flavored Doritos I put some jalepenos on it... I think I need to up my heat game. I am noticing them.


Mrs kees tried making relish in the bullet blender today
BRRRRRRRRRT baby food
 
2020-06-30 1:22:22 AM  
6 votes:

spaztic lv6 cleric: clodcomplex: [Link][Fark user image image 598x602]
/I'm going to need you to watch this

Life hack.....

[Fark user image image 425x318]

The arrow next to the gas pump symbol denotes which side the tank is on.

/every time, all the time!


Yeah but when you turn the car around it's facing a different direction.
 
2020-06-29 10:30:30 PM  
6 votes:

Cornelis de Gyselaer: clodcomplex: Squid_for_Brains: JulieAzel626: https://twitter.com/maggieNYT/status/1​277785559394631687?s=19

Trump Got Written Briefing in February on Possible Russian Bounties, Officials Say - The New York Times https://t.co/abjWBOMupr

HAHAHAHA Press Sec and Haskell and Ratcliffe and Jim Banks who just lied their asses off for Trump:
[Fark user image 425x238] [View Full Size image _x_]

In fairness, I read the Haspell statement 3 times and I'm almost certain it didn't say anything

Word salad


The statement by Haskell, on the other hand, was very complimentary to Mrs. Cleaver
 
2020-06-29 8:47:48 PM  
6 votes:

Sarah Jessica Farker: DOGGOS


HUSKIES!!! :D

aetre.xepher.netView Full Size
 
2020-06-29 8:40:19 PM  
6 votes:
 
2020-06-29 7:13:21 PM  
6 votes:
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2020-06-29 6:59:10 PM  
6 votes:
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2020-06-29 5:06:38 PM  
6 votes:
Cat girls was before I was a Maddite. Ah well.

i.kym-cdn.comView Full Size
 
2020-06-29 5:06:35 PM  
6 votes:

Johnny the Tackling Alzheimers Patient: Cornelis de Gyselaer: Cultured: HedlessChickn: ProTip: A standard face mask will not stop your jizz from hitting your eye when you watch yourself while you're masturbating to orgasm and you don't look away.

/TMYK

Glasses help.
Evening everyone.
/Wears glasses

And then you have jizz glasses

Sure. I'm the one with bad taste.
/phrasing?


Have you tried pineapple?
 
2020-06-30 1:04:24 PM  
5 votes:

Unbridled Apathy: Started brushing my teeth, forgot they turned off the water for nearby roadwork. Had to rinse with Coke Zero.


All out of orange juice?
 
2020-06-30 12:03:18 AM  
5 votes:

EighthDay: Squid_for_Brains: So Donald was informed in March. He invited the Taliban to Camp David in November.

Yes?

Don't forget is trying to get Russia back into the G8


Scene: covert location 500 m from G8 conference
#1: I see Trump and I also see Putin in the room.
#2: Good. Here's two bullets. I want you to shoot that orange cheeto in the head. Then obliterate Putin's nuts.
#1: I'm only gonna need a single shot.
 
2020-06-29 8:31:10 PM  
5 votes:

JulieAzel626: https://www.bbc.com/news/amp/health-5​3​218704?__twitter_impression=true

"A new strain of flu that has the potential to become pandemic has been identified in China by scientists. It emerged recently and is carried by pigs, but can infect humans, they say." Researchers concerned it could mutate so that it can spread easily.


In b 4 Swine flu 2 electric Boogaloo
 
2020-06-29 8:22:33 PM  
5 votes:

badtrotsky013: Johnny the Tackling Alzheimers Patient: I hereby demand that I be given a Fark account: For certain definitions of "classical" and "music"

I figured that there's got to be a new band nerds in the group that would appreciate it. I've played that recording for a few musical friends and seen them lose it completely when the bagpipes kick in.

I've actually done a couple of PDQ Bach pieces with choirs in the past. It's surprisingly difficult to deliberately perform bad music.

It looks like Peter Schicklele has posted a lot of his earlier pieces on YouTube.

All music is worth posting. Except the Shags. Do not google the Shags. Do not go to you tube and listen to the Shags. I have warned you.


Google GG Allin instead

Make sure that you get a live show

/Narrator: um no
 
2020-06-29 8:07:40 PM  
5 votes:

I hereby demand that I be given a Fark account: Cornelis de Gyselaer: Great now we won't be able to even respond to your posts

That's not a bad thing on the Poltab!


I tried six times to smart this post.
 
2020-06-29 7:55:57 PM  
5 votes:
Give'm hell, Hellboy!

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2020-06-29 6:28:39 PM  
5 votes:
pbs.twimg.comView Full Size
 
2020-06-29 4:29:52 PM  
5 votes:

HedlessChickn: ProTip: A standard face mask will not stop your jizz from hitting your eye when you watch yourself while you're masturbating to orgasm and you don't look away.

/TMYK


Glasses help.
Evening everyone.
/Wears glasses
 
2020-06-29 4:19:23 PM  
5 votes:

Cornelis de Gyselaer: Johnny the Tackling Alzheimers Patient: Cornelis de Gyselaer: the_innkeeper: Cornelis de Gyselaer: the_innkeeper: [Fark user image image 425x239]

A bug

If you say so

About 430 on the flower.

I'm on my tablet had to zoom in

Lady bug?

Lindsey?

/ducks

Booooo


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-06-29 4:17:34 PM  
5 votes:

Cornelis de Gyselaer: the_innkeeper: Cornelis de Gyselaer: the_innkeeper: [Fark user image image 425x239]

A bug

If you say so

About 430 on the flower.

I'm on my tablet had to zoom in

Lady bug?


Lindsey?

/ducks
 
2020-06-30 2:51:30 PM  
4 votes:
 
2020-06-30 1:01:56 PM  
4 votes:
Started brushing my teeth, forgot they turned off the water for nearby roadwork. Had to rinse with Coke Zero.
 
2020-06-30 12:34:26 AM  
4 votes:

clodcomplex: [Fark user image 598x602]
/I'm going to need you to watch this


Ha ha...I understand that in my bones.

And this:

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2020-06-29 11:00:40 PM  
4 votes:

Cornelis de Gyselaer: spaztic lv6 cleric: Cornelis de Gyselaer: badtrotsky013: Cornelis de Gyselaer: badtrotsky013: So I suddenly decided it was time for the Residents. Because that happens to me.

[Fark user image 225x225]

I don't know if I will get to that one. I started with Meet the Residents.

Their stuff is so weird

I believe you misspelled "awesome"

/autocorrect.... It happens

Did you see all Taylor's news


I did.

Good to hear about church's chicken for dinner.  He earned it after a long day of "milk maid" porn.
 
2020-06-29 9:54:19 PM  
4 votes:
Fark user image
 
2020-06-29 9:53:03 PM  
4 votes:
Back in the late 1970s / early 1980s, I was in a serious relationship w/ a guy. There ended up being a third woman for a short bit. We all three went separate ways, but years later, he and she got together again and are married. We're all on friendly terms.

I mention this because when I hear Susan Rice talk, she sounds so much like my friend's wife, it's uncanny.
 
2020-06-29 8:24:49 PM  
4 votes:
https://twitter.com/GaryGrumbach/stat​u​s/1277758017233092610?s=19

Significant reporting from @kwelkernbc @carolelee on "White power" RT Sunday:
The video remained on Trump's account bc WH officials couldn't reach him to ask him to delete it, two officials said. The president was at his golf club in VA and had put his phone down, officials said.
 
2020-06-29 8:08:48 PM  
4 votes:

JulieAzel626: CNN Pentagon reporter Barbara Starr:

Intelligence that assessed that there was an effort by the GRU unit to pay bounty money to kill US soldiers was included in one of President Trump's Daily Brief (PDB).


Shoulda put it in his goddamn Speak 'n Spell instead.
 
2020-06-29 7:57:17 PM  
4 votes:

I hereby demand that I be given a Fark account: Cornelis de Gyselaer: I hereby demand that I be given a Fark account: Johnny the Tackling Alzheimers Patient: For a change of pace, some classical music:

For certain definitions of "classical" and "music"


\ Damn, PDQ Bach would have been a great username.

Make an Alt

I already have "I hereby demand that I be given a longer Fark account" in mind.


Great now we won't be able to even respond to your posts
 
2020-06-29 7:00:15 PM  
4 votes:
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-06-29 6:35:31 PM  
4 votes:

clodcomplex: [pbs.twimg.com image 680x296]


First thing that came to mind

imgs.xkcd.comView Full Size
 
2020-06-29 5:09:04 PM  
4 votes:

Sarah Jessica Farker: Cat girls was before I was a Maddite. Ah well.

[i.kym-cdn.com image 311x393]


This place can barely handle ponies.
imagehosting.equestriadaily.comView Full Size

Trump really broke, y'all.
 
2020-06-29 4:38:18 PM  
4 votes:

Cultured: Cornelis de Gyselaer: Cultured: HedlessChickn: ProTip: A standard face mask will not stop your jizz from hitting your eye when you watch yourself while you're masturbating to orgasm and you don't look away.

/TMYK

Glasses help.
Evening everyone.
/Wears glasses

And then you have jizz glasses

And?


*Backs away*
*slowly*
 
2020-06-30 2:32:41 PM  
3 votes:

the_innkeeper: DannyBrandt: Just because I like stringing together words in an order that have likely never been spoken or written once in all of history...

"I love a good set of fake tits on a beetle."

I'm not gonna Google it to find out.

Rule 34.


Y'all are gonna make me screenshot my nephew's tweet about how making the bugwife cum gets the whole hive off, aren't you..
 
2020-06-30 1:21:35 PM  
3 votes:
Parler: When you disagree with someone, posting pictures of your fecal matter in the comment section WILL NOT BE TOLERATED

Posting pictures of someone else's fecal matter still OK, whew!
 
2020-06-30 12:16:35 PM  
3 votes:
Standards are so important in social media:

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-06-30 11:43:11 AM  
3 votes:
Morning.  Mr. Dallymo has a minor hand surgery today so I took the day off to drive him to and from.  "It's just a local anesthetic, I can drive myself."  Uh, no.  I bought some new facemasks off of Etsy and they're beautiful, so I'm going to sport one for the waiting room.  "Who's that mysterious woman over there, in that fabulous mask, reading that September 2008 issue of 'Good Housekeeping'?"  It's sort of a demure floral print; if I really wanted to wow them I'd wear the one with the gorgeous blue and gold cloisonné look.  They wouldn't even know what hit them.

All of the continuing healing vibes to Larry and Taylor, and Hope is such a great knowledge resource.
 
2020-06-30 7:42:06 AM  
3 votes:
lol U2 sued us.
 
2020-06-29 11:22:08 PM  
3 votes:

BlousyBrown: this was part of an exhibit at omsi last December.

Fark user imageView Full Size

By a guy called Christopher Marley.


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2020-06-29 10:00:19 PM  
3 votes:

Johnny the Tackling Alzheimers Patient: JulieAzel626: Arizona man gonna Arizona man:

https://twitter.com/12News/status/1277​775602087575552?s=19

Mountainside Fitness CEO and Founder Tom Hatten announced that his company will sue the state to block Gov. Ducey's order today closing gyms until July 27. MORE: https://t.co/EzPlqE8IQU

Can't he just do the usual thing that failing fitness clubs do? Declare bankruptcy, shuffle the membership fees into another account, and reopen in a couple of months under a new name.


No able to right now, because he has to be at the gym in 26 minutes.
 
2020-06-29 9:29:56 PM  
3 votes:

Aetre: The cynic in me: the SEC was probably singlehandedly responsible for Mississippi changing the flag. Once football got threatened... Oh, shots were considered fired.

Also the cynic in me: so all it took for change to happen was for a whole lotta money to get involved. Go figure!


Okay, at first I thought "Securities and Exchange Commission" and I was really confused.....
 
2020-06-29 8:34:48 PM  
3 votes:

Cornelis de Gyselaer: badtrotsky013: Squid_for_Brains: There is this perfectly WTF monument to the boll weevil in Alabama...
[Fark user image 425x705]
I can't say plopping an actual weevil on top of a neoclassical monument is a stunning artistic choice. In fact I laugh my ass off every time I see this thing.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boll_W​eevil_Monument

I am totally cool with that.

This is st Urho

Yes I know locusts aren't beetles

[Fark user image 337x450]


See these are fricking statues fark yeah!
I want statues of Paul Bunyon killing huge ticks.
Lady Liberty fighting off the dust bowl with a wave of her hand.
Not some old historically not so cool person.
 
2020-06-29 8:25:36 PM  
3 votes:

bdub77: badtrotsky013: All music is worth posting. Except the Shags. Do not google the Shags. Do not go to you tube and listen to the Shags. I have warned you.

Twenty people are on youtube right now searching that.


Poor dumb bastards.
 
2020-06-29 8:24:35 PM  
3 votes:

badtrotsky013: All music is worth posting. Except the Shags. Do not google the Shags. Do not go to you tube and listen to the Shags. I have warned you.


Twenty people are on youtube right now searching that.
 
2020-06-29 8:19:26 PM  
3 votes:

Johnny the Tackling Alzheimers Patient: I hereby demand that I be given a Fark account: For certain definitions of "classical" and "music"

I figured that there's got to be a new band nerds in the group that would appreciate it. I've played that recording for a few musical friends and seen them lose it completely when the bagpipes kick in.

I've actually done a couple of PDQ Bach pieces with choirs in the past. It's surprisingly difficult to deliberately perform bad music.

It looks like Peter Schicklele has posted a lot of his earlier pieces on YouTube.


All music is worth posting. Except the Shags. Do not google the Shags. Do not go to you tube and listen to the Shags. I have warned you.
 
2020-06-29 7:02:40 PM  
3 votes:
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-06-29 6:24:33 PM  
3 votes:
From McSweeney's website:

JUNE 29, 2020
LISTS

8 WAYS MEN CAN WEAR FACE MASKS AND STILL FEEL MANLY
by DEVORAH BLACHOR

"Dick Cheney says WEAR A MASK. #realmenwearmasks" - Rep. Liz Cheney
"Men less likely to wear face masks because they're 'not cool' and 'a sign of weakness' says study." - The Hill

- - -

1. Whenever he agrees to put on his mask, refer to him as "the man."

2. As soon as he consents to wear protective gear that can save the lives of vulnerable people, pretend you can't lift something and then ask for his help.

3. If he agrees that epidemiologists know more than he does about how the Coronavirus spreads, ask him to grill the meat at a barbecue.

4. Once he resolves to never use a fake mask exemption ID card, make sure he feels appreciated by saying, "You do so much! Wow! I am so grateful!"

5. Compliment him for not appearing at the West Palm Beach public hearing and claiming that wearing protective masks violates God's wonderful breathing system, and then compliment him again about something like a muscle or his technical abilities or whatever.

6. If he has stopped labeling other men who wear medically recommended masks as "weak," tell him that he's the best lover you ever had. He'll believe you.

7. Does he fully understand that mask-wearing regulations do not violate the Constitution? Now's the time to make a casual remark about his stubble, and how quickly it grows.

8. As soon as he seems to grasp the concept that his reluctance to wear a mask is based on stereotypical gender ideas that are destructive to society, even when there's not a pandemic health crisis going on and that worrying what other people think about you for wearing a mask is in fact a weakness and that more than 120,000 Americans have died because not enough people are taking precautions like wearing masks that could have saved so many of them and I can't believe anyone even has to have this conversation what the fark is wrong with people just be a man and put on the goddamn mask... Ask him to drive the car. Laugh at his jokes. Ask him to order your food. Say something flirty. Scream when you see a spider.
 
2020-06-29 5:51:58 PM  
3 votes:

Johnny the Tackling Alzheimers Patient: Cornelis de Gyselaer: vudukungfu: Treason

Charge him

Try him

Convict him

you know the rest

He's set himself on fire this time
What's the burning point of Teflon?

Warning! Burning Teflon gives off toxic fumes.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polymer_​fume_fever


I assume burning Trump would smell like hamberder grease and bile.
 
2020-06-29 5:03:55 PM  
3 votes:

real_headhoncho: DannyBrandt: Cornelis de Gyselaer: DannyBrandt: ForlornHope: DannyBrandt: badtrotsky013: Did something happen with cat girls?

Oh, man... that was a fun thread.

Basically two or three guys testing the waters to what was acceptable and what was creepy as hell.

I remember that, it was epically bad.

It was a nightmare. I'm laughing my ass off remembering that thread just going completely unhinged.

It was awesome.

even the pol tab didn't measure up

It was one of those threads where by the time you typed out a comment, there was like 40 more posts.

Ah, the good ol' dunza days.

[Fark user image image 800x450]Did someone mention cat girls?


We did win the award for the worst ruckus in a Maddow thread that evening
 
2020-06-29 4:41:44 PM  
3 votes:

Unbridled Apathy: AotD is BEETLES!


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-06-29 4:36:39 PM  
3 votes:

Cornelis de Gyselaer: Cultured: HedlessChickn: ProTip: A standard face mask will not stop your jizz from hitting your eye when you watch yourself while you're masturbating to orgasm and you don't look away.

/TMYK

Glasses help.
Evening everyone.
/Wears glasses

And then you have jizz glasses


And?
 
2020-06-30 1:36:24 PM  
2 votes:

brachiopod: Parler: When you disagree with someone, posting pictures of your fecal matter in the comment section WILL NOT BE TOLERATED

Posting pictures of someone else's fecal matter still OK, whew!


Website "Rate My Poo" is consulting with their legal representatives for guidance.
 
2020-06-30 1:25:00 PM  
2 votes:

DannyBrandt: Dallymo: DannyBrandt: Unbridled Apathy: Started brushing my teeth, forgot they turned off the water for nearby roadwork. Had to rinse with Coke Zero.

All out of orange juice?

*barfs*

Hey, I had to look at beetle pictures.

Which is bullsh*t. Real beetles don't look like that. You think that artist didn't scrub a bunch of feces off of that bug before he photographed it?

That "artist" is portraying beetles in an unrealistic light, causing other beetles to feel bad about themselves.


Carapace shaming.
 
2020-06-30 1:21:13 PM  
2 votes:
Just because I like stringing together words in an order that have likely never been spoken or written once in all of history...

"I love a good set of fake tits on a beetle."

I'm not gonna Google it to find out.
 
2020-06-30 12:15:35 PM  
2 votes:

ForlornHope: Johnny the Tackling Alzheimers Patient: In local news, a couple of days ago one of the few remaining Vancouver strip clubs made Fark news due to an outbreak of COVID. According to local news, like all businesses the club submitted a plan to the Public Health Office detailing how they would maintain social distancing between patrons and staff as a condition for reopening.

To nobody's surprise, the plan was bullshirt and they completely ignored it. So, they've been shutdown again.

and this is why we can't have nice things.......


No kidding.

My stock holdings in body glitter and vanilla-scented oils have tanked.
 
2020-06-30 8:04:42 AM  
2 votes:

G-Ride: badtrotsky013: Christianity is stupid.


I used to have a t shirt that said that.

/gift from a friend
//no idea why he thought I might like it
///three


I am guessing your friend liked it and you would wear it because hey free shirt.
 
2020-06-30 12:39:56 AM  
2 votes:

clodcomplex: [Fark user image 598x602]
/I'm going to need you to watch this


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-06-29 11:32:35 PM  
2 votes:

Azz: HedlessChickn: I think they're throwing trump under the bus in order to force him to resign

Stop, erect, etc


My $1000 bet is that "Trump will not be re-elected".

Can't be re-elected if he's not on the ballot or the nominee.

:D
 
2020-06-29 11:29:57 PM  
2 votes:
Good gawd, I just read that Carl Bernstein piece on cnn.com.  Wowza.  They ought to get some voice actors to record nice things about how strong and manly Fat Donnie is, and make sure that his phone is on airplane mode and if he tries to dial he just gets one of those recordings.
 
2020-06-29 11:16:36 PM  
2 votes:

Dallymo: EighthDay: I exercised!

I blame the_innkeeper

You've both inspired me.  I'm going to go use Mr. Dallymo's exercise weight machine thingy for a little bit.

But Perry Mason is on at 8:30 so I can't spend too much time improving my fitness.


Whew, that was good.  10 each bench presses and leg lifts.  With the pulleys disconnected from the weight plates, just with the little...I don't know...five pound? plate.

I'm decrepit.  Mr. Dallymo says if I do 10 a day for a couple of weeks maybe I'll be able to add a weight plate when I develop an actual muscle.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
Azz [TotalFark]
2020-06-29 11:00:35 PM  
2 votes:
And markoff moving on up. Yay

/Markoff also buying the next 17 rounds 😁
 
2020-06-29 10:43:02 PM  
2 votes:

JulieAzel626: WASHINGTON (AP) AP sources: White House was aware of intelligence on Russian bounties on US troops in 2019


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-06-29 9:26:14 PM  
2 votes:
 
2020-06-29 9:10:58 PM  
2 votes:
pbs.twimg.comView Full Size

I'm not sure, but I think this is a graph of my drinking in 2020.
 
2020-06-29 8:56:17 PM  
2 votes:

I hereby demand that I be given a Fark account: Markoff_Cheney: I feel like a bike ride tonight.
I want to go shoot the Buddhist temple down the street again.
Will report back.

Are we not doing phrasing anymore?


Oh man, I immediately regretted my phrasing in the other chat like yeah
I am a bit space cadet today, but I got my chores done.
 
2020-06-29 8:49:47 PM  
2 votes:
Apparently you shouldn't shoot the local Buddhist temple, unless for photography reasons as pre approved by the BAOC who own the property.
Bad wording.
Phrasing.
 
2020-06-29 8:47:52 PM  
2 votes:

Markoff_Cheney: I feel like a bike ride tonight.
I want to go shoot the Buddhist temple down the street again.
Will report back.


Shooting their statues is bad dude

They had nothing to do with American confederates
 
2020-06-29 8:32:39 PM  
2 votes:
 
2020-06-29 8:24:00 PM  
2 votes:

badtrotsky013: All music is worth posting.


I'll take ya up on that.


The Best Ever Death Metal Band In Denton - The Mountain Goats (w\ lyrics)
Youtube 4IsXKMkDAMQ


^ Just a folk rock tune you can totally play at full volume in a public place. Totally.
 
2020-06-29 8:22:53 PM  
2 votes:

badtrotsky013: Johnny the Tackling Alzheimers Patient: I hereby demand that I be given a Fark account: For certain definitions of "classical" and "music"

I figured that there's got to be a new band nerds in the group that would appreciate it. I've played that recording for a few musical friends and seen them lose it completely when the bagpipes kick in.

I've actually done a couple of PDQ Bach pieces with choirs in the past. It's surprisingly difficult to deliberately perform bad music.

It looks like Peter Schicklele has posted a lot of his earlier pieces on YouTube.

All music is worth posting. Except the Shags. Do not google the Shags. Do not go to you tube and listen to the Shags. I have warned you.


"My pal's name is Foot Foot"
I have their album. I should be ashamed, but I'm not.
 
2020-06-29 8:22:19 PM  
2 votes:
There is this perfectly WTF monument to the boll weevil in Alabama...
Fark user imageView Full Size

I can't say plopping an actual weevil on top of a neoclassical monument is a stunning artistic choice. In fact I laugh my ass off every time I see this thing.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boll_​W​eevil_Monument
 
2020-06-29 8:05:36 PM  
2 votes:

Cornelis de Gyselaer: Great now we won't be able to even respond to your posts


That's not a bad thing on the Poltab!

\ And if I Oh Fark $500 I know Drew would let me keep it.
\\ Bribery works!
 
2020-06-29 7:55:33 PM  
2 votes:

I hereby demand that I be given a Fark account: Johnny the Tackling Alzheimers Patient: For a change of pace, some classical music:

For certain definitions of "classical" and "music"


\ Damn, PDQ Bach would have been a great username.


Make an Alt
 
2020-06-29 7:38:32 PM  
2 votes:

Cornelis de Gyselaer: clodcomplex: [pbs.twimg.com image 680x296]

How can we we tell the difference


They bounce higher than normal?
 
2020-06-29 6:53:14 PM  
2 votes:
Is it over yet?
 
2020-06-29 5:54:19 PM  
2 votes:

Johnny the Tackling Alzheimers Patient: Cornelis de Gyselaer: Johnny the Tackling Alzheimers Patient: Cornelis de Gyselaer: vudukungfu: Treason

Charge him

Try him

Convict him

you know the rest

He's set himself on fire this time
What's the burning point of Teflon?

Warning! Burning Teflon gives off toxic fumes.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polymer_​fume_fever

Well its Trump waht did you expect attar of roses?

Brimstone, actually.


+1 AAA would smart again
 
2020-06-29 5:48:04 PM  
2 votes:

Cultured: Johnny the Tackling Alzheimers Patient: Cornelis de Gyselaer: Cultured: HedlessChickn: ProTip: A standard face mask will not stop your jizz from hitting your eye when you watch yourself while you're masturbating to orgasm and you don't look away.

/TMYK

Glasses help.
Evening everyone.
/Wears glasses

And then you have jizz glasses

Sure. I'm the one with bad taste.
/phrasing?

Have you tried pineapple?


Well, I put it on pizza but that just makes a whole new group of people upset at me.
 
2020-06-29 5:20:36 PM  
2 votes:

Sarah Jessica Farker: Cornelis de Gyselaer: Sarah Jessica Farker: Cornelis de Gyselaer: Sarah Jessica Farker: Damn, I should have taken a screenshot w/ the split screen showing the artwork in the background of Heilman's place coordinating near perfectly with Nicolle's outfit today.

Not to late

It is because I was busy typing :D

The crook or the flail for Wands?
Also I've rethought how about canopic jars for cups

[Fark user image image 425x318]
Comical Tower cards.

Actually the one on the right isn't terrible.


Looks like they are... Having trouble...  Keeping it up.
 
2020-06-29 5:14:54 PM  
2 votes:
And we all signed the waiver.
imagehosting.equestriadaily.comView Full Size
 
2020-06-29 5:02:57 PM  
2 votes:

DannyBrandt: Cornelis de Gyselaer: DannyBrandt: ForlornHope: DannyBrandt: badtrotsky013: Did something happen with cat girls?

Oh, man... that was a fun thread.

Basically two or three guys testing the waters to what was acceptable and what was creepy as hell.

I remember that, it was epically bad.

It was a nightmare. I'm laughing my ass off remembering that thread just going completely unhinged.

It was awesome.

even the pol tab didn't measure up

It was one of those threads where by the time you typed out a comment, there was like 40 more posts.

Ah, the good ol' dunza days.


Fark user imageView Full Size
Did someone mention cat girls?
 
2020-06-29 4:49:13 PM  
2 votes:

Cornelis de Gyselaer: Cultured: HedlessChickn: ProTip: A standard face mask will not stop your jizz from hitting your eye when you watch yourself while you're masturbating to orgasm and you don't look away.

/TMYK

Glasses help.
Evening everyone.
/Wears glasses

And then you have jizz glasses


Sure. I'm the one with bad taste.
/phrasing?
 
2020-06-29 4:32:00 PM  
2 votes:

Cultured: HedlessChickn: ProTip: A standard face mask will not stop your jizz from hitting your eye when you watch yourself while you're masturbating to orgasm and you don't look away.

/TMYK

Glasses help.
Evening everyone.
/Wears glasses


And then you have jizz glasses
 
2020-06-30 3:10:21 PM  
1 vote:

Flerkenpie070: DannyBrandt: Just because I like stringing together words in an order that have likely never been spoken or written once in all of history...

"I love a good set of fake tits on a beetle."

I'm not gonna Google it to find out.

you, flerken likes you


Tentacles (redacted)

Sorry guys it was low hanging so I couldn't resist
 
2020-06-30 3:00:48 PM  
1 vote:

Cornelis de Gyselaer: JulieAzel626: Apparently there is going to be a White House press briefing at 3:30 p.m. ET.

A a new thing to not watch


Ahh but the thread will gold Jerry. Gold!
 
2020-06-30 1:48:27 PM  
1 vote:

EighthDay: [Fark user image 425x489]


Caught that.  Probably just caused Fauci to get fired.
 
2020-06-30 1:31:23 PM  
1 vote:

Dallymo: DannyBrandt: Dallymo: DannyBrandt: Unbridled Apathy: Started brushing my teeth, forgot they turned off the water for nearby roadwork. Had to rinse with Coke Zero.

All out of orange juice?

*barfs*

Hey, I had to look at beetle pictures.

Which is bullsh*t. Real beetles don't look like that. You think that artist didn't scrub a bunch of feces off of that bug before he photographed it?

That "artist" is portraying beetles in an unrealistic light, causing other beetles to feel bad about themselves.

Carapace shaming.


Some men like the legs, some like the antennae, I'm a thorax man.
 
2020-06-30 1:25:26 PM  
1 vote:

brachiopod: Parler: When you disagree with someone, posting pictures of your fecal matter in the comment section WILL NOT BE TOLERATED

Posting pictures of someone else's fecal matter still OK, whew!


Has to be, else how can you post pics of Trump on there?
 
2020-06-30 1:24:48 PM  
1 vote:

Dallymo: null: And in the "someone is farking with null" chronicles, I had a headline go green only to go back red with "duplicate of" and the link to the duplicate was the thread it was calling a duplicate.  WTF.

Some modmin needs to be taken off duty before they delete everything but the Pol tab.

That was yours?? I saw that!  I thought I was having a stroke or time glitch; I clicked that link like three times before I thought to look at the thread ID in the link and realized it was the same as in the URL.


Yuppers.

Someone submitted the same link, it was redlit with 0 comments at the time I saw mine get redlit with "duplicate link".
 
2020-06-30 1:16:03 PM  
1 vote:

Dallymo: DannyBrandt: Unbridled Apathy: Started brushing my teeth, forgot they turned off the water for nearby roadwork. Had to rinse with Coke Zero.

All out of orange juice?

*barfs*


Hey, I had to look at beetle pictures.

Which is bullsh*t. Real beetles don't look like that. You think that artist didn't scrub a bunch of feces off of that bug before he photographed it?

That "artist" is portraying beetles in an unrealistic light, causing other beetles to feel bad about themselves.
 
2020-06-30 12:12:54 PM  
1 vote:

clodcomplex: [Fark user image 598x602]
/I'm going to need you to watch this


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
Azz [TotalFark]
2020-06-30 10:42:08 AM  
1 vote:
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-06-30 1:20:19 AM  
1 vote:
What? You mean the Taliban and the U.S. is at war? No way.
 
2020-06-29 11:01:04 PM  
1 vote:

EighthDay: I exercised!

I blame the_innkeeper


You've both inspired me.  I'm going to go use Mr. Dallymo's exercise weight machine thingy for a little bit.

But Perry Mason is on at 8:30 so I can't spend too much time improving my fitness.
 
2020-06-29 10:46:34 PM  
1 vote:
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-06-29 10:24:07 PM  
1 vote:

Squid_for_Brains: JulieAzel626: https://twitter.com/maggieNYT/status/1​277785559394631687?s=19

Trump Got Written Briefing in February on Possible Russian Bounties, Officials Say - The New York Times https://t.co/abjWBOMupr

HAHAHAHA Press Sec and Haskell and Ratcliffe and Jim Banks who just lied their asses off for Trump:
[Fark user image 425x238] [View Full Size image _x_]


In fairness, I read the Haspell statement 3 times and I'm almost certain it didn't say anything
 
2020-06-29 10:16:19 PM  
1 vote:

JulieAzel626: https://twitter.com/maggieNYT/status/​1​277785559394631687?s=19

Trump Got Written Briefing in February on Possible Russian Bounties, Officials Say - The New York Times https://t.co/abjWBOMupr


HAHAHAHA Press Sec and Haskell and Ratcliffe and Jim Banks who just lied their asses off for Trump:
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-06-29 10:06:18 PM  
1 vote:

clodcomplex: Squid_for_Brains: clodcomplex: [Fark user image image 598x79]

Yeah? Then call the police and put on some shoes.

Btw...what's going on in that house that makes you both so screeching bug-eyed paranoid? Racism? Meth? Hubby's dark web "fine art" collection?

[pbs.twimg.com image 800x1067]


Isn't that the house from the original Robin Williams Jumanji movie?
 
2020-06-29 9:39:30 PM  
1 vote:
I wish we had a collection of redhats who all went into a coma shortly before the election, and once a week or so, one of them would wake up so we could explain how the last 3.5 years have gone since Hillary took office and document their reactions.

And then we'd get an awesome montage of them all having heart attacks after we said, "Just kidding, Trump won.  All the rest of that stuff happened, though." We'd set it to Another One Bites the Dust.
 
2020-06-29 9:34:52 PM  
1 vote:

badtrotsky013: You don't have to wear that dress tonight...


You can leave your hat on
 
2020-06-29 9:02:57 PM  
1 vote:

Squid_for_Brains: There is this perfectly WTF monument to the boll weevil in Alabama...
[Fark user image 425x705]
I can't say plopping an actual weevil on top of a neoclassical monument is a stunning artistic choice. In fact I laugh my ass off every time I see this thing.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boll_W​eevil_Monument


Pat Boone - Rock Boll Weevil 1959
Youtube bB6SvQT1le0
 
2020-06-29 8:38:46 PM  
1 vote:

badtrotsky013: Cornelis de Gyselaer: badtrotsky013: Squid_for_Brains: There is this perfectly WTF monument to the boll weevil in Alabama...
[Fark user image 425x705]
I can't say plopping an actual weevil on top of a neoclassical monument is a stunning artistic choice. In fact I laugh my ass off every time I see this thing.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boll_W​eevil_Monument

I am totally cool with that.

This is st Urho

Yes I know locusts aren't beetles

[Fark user image 337x450]

See these are fricking statues fark yeah!
I want statues of Paul Bunyon killing huge ticks.
Lady Liberty fighting off the dust bowl with a wave of her hand.
Not some old historically not so cool person.


There's a martini-drinking hipster elephant in my mother-in-law's hometown. I have no idea why.
But I love him.
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-06-29 8:29:29 PM  
1 vote:

badtrotsky013: Cornelis de Gyselaer: badtrotsky013: Johnny the Tackling Alzheimers Patient: I hereby demand that I be given a Fark account: For certain definitions of "classical" and "music"

I figured that there's got to be a new band nerds in the group that would appreciate it. I've played that recording for a few musical friends and seen them lose it completely when the bagpipes kick in.

I've actually done a couple of PDQ Bach pieces with choirs in the past. It's surprisingly difficult to deliberately perform bad music.

It looks like Peter Schicklele has posted a lot of his earlier pieces on YouTube.

All music is worth posting. Except the Shags. Do not google the Shags. Do not go to you tube and listen to the Shags. I have warned you.

Google GG Allin instead

Make sure that you get a live show

/Narrator: um no

My musical crew played as GG Allin's back up band. Notice I did NOT mention him at any point.


I hope they had hazmat suits
 
2020-06-29 8:25:44 PM  
1 vote:

Squid_for_Brains: There is this perfectly WTF monument to the boll weevil in Alabama...
[Fark user image 425x705]
I can't say plopping an actual weevil on top of a neoclassical monument is a stunning artistic choice. In fact I laugh my ass off every time I see this thing.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boll_W​eevil_Monument


I also laughed my ass off. Thank you for that.  :)
 
2020-06-29 8:25:42 PM  
1 vote:

JulieAzel626: https://twitter.com/GaryGrumbach/stat​u​s/1277758017233092610?s=19

Significant reporting from @kwelkernbc @carolelee on "White power" RT Sunday:
The video remained on Trump's account bc WH officials couldn't reach him to ask him to delete it, two officials said. The president was at his golf club in VA and had put his phone down, officials said.


More from Welker and Lee's reporting: Aides also tried - unsuccessfully - to reach deputy chief of staff Dan Scavino to ask him to delete the retweet, officials said. Once officials were able to reach the president, he agreed to delete it, officials said.
 
2020-06-29 8:23:53 PM  
1 vote:

Squid_for_Brains: There is this perfectly WTF monument to the boll weevil in Alabama...
[Fark user image 425x705]
I can't say plopping an actual weevil on top of a neoclassical monument is a stunning artistic choice. In fact I laugh my ass off every time I see this thing.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boll_W​eevil_Monument


I am totally cool with that.
 
2020-06-29 8:11:47 PM  
1 vote:

Aetre: Cornelis de Gyselaer: Cultured: JulieAzel626: From Huffington Post:

In floor speech on Russian bounties and Trump's knowledge of intel, Sen. Duckworth says "ignorance isn't exculpatory."

"'No one told me' is not an excuse for a commander in chief...it is in fact a confession of incompetence," she adds.

"He's had time to call Joe Biden names, however....not once in the past 72 hours has he found time to express outrage that American service members are dead," Duckworth says.

"Not responding here is a response in its own way."

Duckworth accuses Trump of making it "more likely that more spouses will be widowed and more moms and dads turned into gold star parents."

"How dare he still call himself the commander in chief?"

Where do I have to move to vote for Tammy Duckworth?

As VP anywhere

I think she's CA

Tammy Duckworth is a Senator for Illinois.


Well damn
Kees be dum
 
2020-06-29 7:52:54 PM  
1 vote:
For a change of pace, some classical music:

Pervertimento For Bagpipes, Bicycle And Balloons, S. 66
Youtube RjqW3ec5_Nk
 
2020-06-29 7:40:07 PM  
1 vote:
New Jersey to "pause" reopening plans and not allow indoor dining, according to the New Jersey governor.
 
2020-06-29 7:10:38 PM  
1 vote:

real_headhoncho: [Youtube-video https://www.youtube.com/embed/oQyFFTh_​YGc]
I remember that look...


Are you ready boots?
 
2020-06-29 7:10:25 PM  
1 vote:
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-06-29 7:05:54 PM  
1 vote:
I did not smoke any weed.
 
2020-06-29 6:49:35 PM  
1 vote:

Cultured: badtrotsky013: Cultured: real_headhoncho: Unbridled Apathy: AotD is BEETLES!

[Fark user image image 259x194]

Herbie!

I loved Herbie. I was also a big fan of Speed Buggy.

Me too. Herbie was also my introduction to Buddy Hackett.


Buddy was in a bunch of the low budget Disneys from that era. I liked the early Kurt Russel films but I don't know if he was in those. I liked the Gus the football playing donkey film I think he was in that. They got an ass to kick field goals. It wasn't the first time.  :)
 
2020-06-29 6:42:36 PM  
1 vote:

Cultured: Cornelis de Gyselaer: He mad

[Fark user image image 425x390]

Cerambycidae?


Hah you tell me I didn't pay attention when I grabbed it
 
2020-06-29 6:36:22 PM  
1 vote:

Cornelis de Gyselaer: clodcomplex: [pbs.twimg.com image 680x296]

How can we we tell the difference


They'll be less rubbery
 
2020-06-29 5:58:22 PM  
1 vote:

clodcomplex: [Fark user image 733x56]
/holy fark, The_Donald got the axe today too


The great Bannation has begun.
 
2020-06-29 5:52:00 PM  
1 vote:

Johnny the Tackling Alzheimers Patient: Cornelis de Gyselaer: vudukungfu: Treason

Charge him

Try him

Convict him

you know the rest

He's set himself on fire this time
What's the burning point of Teflon?

Warning! Burning Teflon gives off toxic fumes.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polymer_​fume_fever


Well its Trump waht did you expect attar of roses?
 
2020-06-29 5:19:38 PM  
1 vote:

Cornelis de Gyselaer: Sarah Jessica Farker: Cornelis de Gyselaer: Sarah Jessica Farker: Damn, I should have taken a screenshot w/ the split screen showing the artwork in the background of Heilman's place coordinating near perfectly with Nicolle's outfit today.

Not to late

It is because I was busy typing :D

The crook or the flail for Wands?
Also I've rethought how about canopic jars for cups


Fark user imageView Full Size

Comical Tower cards.

Actually the one on the right isn't terrible.
 
2020-06-29 5:02:31 PM  
1 vote:

Cornelis de Gyselaer: Sarah Jessica Farker: Damn, I should have taken a screenshot w/ the split screen showing the artwork in the background of Heilman's place coordinating near perfectly with Nicolle's outfit today.

Not to late


It is because I was busy typing :D
 
2020-06-29 4:42:34 PM  
1 vote:

the_innkeeper: Unbridled Apathy: AotD is BEETLES!

[Fark user image image 425x276]


I KNEW they would be first.
 
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