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(University of British Colombia)   Scientists at the No S*** Sherlock Institute determine that smoking, divorce and alcohol abuse are the factors most closely associated with dying   (news.ubc.ca) divider line
    More: Obvious, Life expectancy, Johns Hopkins University, United States, survey data, behavioural factors, Biological factors, people's lives, alcohol abuse  
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414 clicks; posted to Geek » on 26 Jun 2020 at 11:12 PM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



31 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2020-06-26 6:55:37 PM  
I'm gonna wager that those finish 2,3 and 4 behind "living," with which death has a perfect correlation.
 
2020-06-26 7:01:08 PM  
Apparently I should already be dead.
 
2020-06-26 8:52:05 PM  
Walking on railroad bridges, trying to land a commercial airliner with the gears up curiously absent from list.
 
2020-06-26 11:24:07 PM  

revrendjim: Apparently I should already be dead.


I just checked my pulse, I think we are still alive, cheers
 
2020-06-26 11:28:06 PM  
So, I need to start drinking?
 
2020-06-26 11:38:04 PM  
Smoking, divorce, and alcohol abuse. Why did they say alcohol abuse twice?
 
2020-06-26 11:39:49 PM  
Meat Loaf - Two Out Of Three Ain't Bad (PCM Stereo)
Youtube k5hWWe-ts2s
 
2020-06-27 12:40:22 AM  
Nailed this trifecta! Wait, I'm still alive. Shiat.
 
2020-06-27 1:17:34 AM  
Have they done any research into if drinking water is a factor? I've seen preliminary data that suggests everyone who's drank water has either died or is going to die some day.
 
2020-06-27 3:48:58 AM  
Hell, if you're dying why NOT do all those things?
 
2020-06-27 4:10:15 AM  
Scientists and doctors are nerds, but they're not uncool as adults. I've had plenty a fun night with 'em.

Why are medical scientists such spoilsports?  Don't drink, don't smoke, the entire bag isn't "a serving" of potato chips?  It's just mean
 
2020-06-27 5:22:37 AM  
That's right, Subby!

Eat right, exercise, live modestly and chances of death remain steady at 100%.
 
2020-06-27 5:25:01 AM  
What about being alive?
 
2020-06-27 6:39:49 AM  
Well, they say men don't live as long as women. Of course not, we don't want to.
 
2020-06-27 6:48:50 AM  
Huh.  Seems to me that not doing those things is also associated with dying.
 
2020-06-27 7:07:39 AM  
Since alcohol is closely tied to divorce...some people get 2 for 1 when they quit drinking.
 
2020-06-27 7:26:31 AM  

turbocucumber: What about being alive?


It is almost perfectly correlated with dying.
 
2020-06-27 7:44:15 AM  
In that case, I better get started on the whole "skydiving, Rocky Mountain climbing, going 2.7 seconds on a bull named Fu Manchu" thing.
 
2020-06-27 7:47:08 AM  
Kool & The Gang - Hollywood Swinging
Youtube YK-cvcw3ngM
 
2020-06-27 8:19:47 AM  
SO what. I only smoke when I drink, and I only drink when my wife kicks me out of the house. This article has no relevance to me.
 
2020-06-27 8:21:55 AM  
I don't know, my life has gotten way better after my divorce.
/don't date, only attract the crazies, cuz.
//water finds its own level.

(i guess it's due to the poor health/hygiene of certain mens
that can't be arsed to do basic maintenance without being nagged
about it?)
 
2020-06-27 9:38:13 AM  
Whelp I checked off all three so I'm a zombie. I kid, until I'm dead that is
 
2020-06-27 10:18:08 AM  
Shouldn't number 2 be divorce (s)?
 
2020-06-27 10:35:16 AM  
Adam Ant - Goody Two Shoes
Youtube o41A91X5pns
 
2020-06-27 11:26:03 AM  

deadsanta: SO what. I only smoke when I drink, and I only drink when my wife kicks me out of the house. This article has no relevance to me.


At least you get love one day a year...
 
2020-06-27 12:02:50 PM  
Well, that explains my life. I should have been dead years ago.

resident dystopian: (i guess it's due to the poor health/hygiene of certain mens
that can't be arsed to do basic maintenance without being nagged
about it?)


It's those big farking bellies that go along with the poor maintenance. I don't have to go to your house, all I have to do is look at you.

keldaria: Have they done any research into if drinking water is a factor? I've seen preliminary data that suggests everyone who's drank water has either died or is going to die some day.


And if they drank bottled water, they paid 4000% times too much for it, and they died just the same.
They deserved it.
 
2020-06-27 12:58:17 PM  

keldaria: Have they done any research into if drinking water is a factor? I've seen preliminary data that suggests everyone who's drank water has either died or is going to die some day.


i.redd.itView Full Size
I really should fire up Portal 2 again...
 
2020-06-27 1:53:35 PM  
Exercise doesn't make the list??
 
2020-06-27 3:15:24 PM  
Billy Liar:
I remember seeing the film Billy Liar one late night and thinking 'This is where Calvin and Hobbes came from.'
 
2020-06-27 3:55:39 PM  

gaslight: Billy Liar:
I remember seeing the film Billy Liar one late night and thinking 'This is where Calvin and Hobbes came from.'


Always kind of thought of it as a take on Walter Mitty.  But Julie Christie...Man!
 
2020-06-27 7:09:42 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size

I don't smoke!
 
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