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(CNBC)   Jersey to Trump: Sorry, we're closed   (cnbc.com) divider line
    More: Followup, United States, President of the United States, Phil Murphy, New Jersey, president of the United States, White House, Franklin D. Roosevelt, new order  
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3543 clicks; posted to Politics » on 26 Jun 2020 at 2:05 PM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



45 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2020-06-26 1:07:38 PM  
Gov. Phil Murphy told CNBC his quarantine order would not have applied to Trump, because "by any definition the president of the United States is an essential worker."


\scoff
 
2020-06-26 1:12:49 PM  
In fairness, on the rare occasions that I have to travel to New Jersey for some reason, I generally try to find some excuse to cancel as well.  So I can't really cast any stones at Hair Twitler here.
 
2020-06-26 1:22:14 PM  
Somebody already did the Cartman "I do what I want" joke, but it sticks even more firmly to Trump now.

Essential worker? The POTUS. Mr. Golf Tournament profiteer himself?

HA! I say HA!, sir!

His idea of work is moseying down from the private quarters at 11:30 to see if the Lunch Rooms is freshly stocked with nothen berders so he can randomly pick an unopened can of Coke and a Big Muck without fear of being poisioned by the delivery boy or the help who laid it out for visiting Pilgrims of the paying sort.
 
2020-06-26 1:22:34 PM  
In his pajamas and smoking jacket.
 
2020-06-26 1:22:49 PM  
Play date cancelled, temper tantrum incoming.
 
2020-06-26 1:40:56 PM  
Rocco and fat Louis out front should'a told ya. Several times.
 
2020-06-26 1:46:23 PM  
What is the over/under on all of his Secret Service guys being in quarantine thanks to Tulsa and Arizona?
 
2020-06-26 1:48:31 PM  
Good. Keep that farking disease vector and all the others he probably infected that work around him in DC and out of my state.
 
2020-06-26 2:10:11 PM  

Squid_for_Brains: What is the over/under on all of his Secret Service guys being in quarantine thanks to Tulsa and Arizona?


They already were I thought.

Guess he'll be forced to hire whatever Blackwater is now called.
 
2020-06-26 2:10:57 PM  
My guess is the real reason is that the optics suck to see POTUS going to golf/vacation while cases spike in swing states like AZ, FL, and NC.
 
2020-06-26 2:11:01 PM  

arrogantbastich: Gov. Phil Murphy told CNBC his quarantine order would not have applied to Trump, because "by any definition the president of the United States is an essential worker."


\scoff


He's as essential as a third nipple and does less work in a month than any immigrant I've ever known does in a day.
 
2020-06-26 2:11:43 PM  
... the mensch out front shoulda told ya...
 
2020-06-26 2:11:59 PM  

arrogantbastich: Gov. Phil Murphy told CNBC his quarantine order would not have applied to Trump, because "by any definition the president of the United States is an essential worker."


\scoff


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2020-06-26 2:12:16 PM  
New Jersey Gov. Phil Murphy told CNBC his quarantine order would not have applied to Trump, because "by any definition the president of the United States is an essential worker."

He wasn't going there to work, he was going there to golf.
 
2020-06-26 2:14:26 PM  

brantgoose: In his pajamas and smoking jacket.


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/harf
 
2020-06-26 2:16:08 PM  
The president is expendable, that's why there's a back up vice president on standby.

It's expected that not all presidents survive 4 year terms.
 
2020-06-26 2:16:55 PM  

riffraff: Rocco and fat Louis out front should'a told ya. Several times.


...With a lot wild hand gestures.
 
2020-06-26 2:17:35 PM  
Sorry, moose out front shoulda told ya.
 
2020-06-26 2:18:11 PM  
Take your little ball and go home fat boy.
 
2020-06-26 2:19:47 PM  

ItsMyNameYouCantHaveIt: Sorry, moose out front shoulda told ya.


To be fair the noise from the moose's ventilator is quite loud.
 
2020-06-26 2:20:15 PM  
Go get your shinebox, Donny.
 
2020-06-26 2:22:50 PM  

arrogantbastich: Gov. Phil Murphy told CNBC his quarantine order would not have applied to Trump, because "by any definition the president of the United States is an essential worker."


\scoff


Except the only reason President Fat Ass would go to Jersey is to golf, right?
 
2020-06-26 2:23:07 PM  
He's to busy sulking about nobody likes him as much as Joe ..
 
2020-06-26 2:23:44 PM  
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Don't really care as long as he doesn't go to the Trump Colts Neck course near my house
 
2020-06-26 2:23:56 PM  
Two "interesting" points: 1. The White House said the cancellation was not related to a new state order requiring quarantine for visitors who have been in states with increasing numbers of coronavirus cases. When the White House says this, the opposite is the truth. Also Donnie Covid-19 don't do masks. They're for sissies and Democrats

Trump was planning to stay at his golf course in Bedminster. Playing golf while the country is a total mess caused by himself..... Priceless......

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2020-06-26 2:28:12 PM  
Instead of quarantining Trump, just shut down the golf course if it breaks quarantine.
 
2020-06-26 2:34:27 PM  
I guess that spam email i got telling me that the president wants to meet me was just a lie...
 
2020-06-26 2:37:04 PM  

Squid_for_Brains: What is the over/under on all of his Secret Service guys being in quarantine thanks to Tulsa and Arizona?


Didn't think about that, but possible.  I was thinking more along the lines of perhaps Donny's just feeling a little under the weather today...  Probably nothing.
 
2020-06-26 2:37:56 PM  
An "essential worker" who travels for leisure isn't quite essential.
 
2020-06-26 2:44:04 PM  
Trump*'s speaking vocabulary is at the 4th grade level. They've used the same kind of analysis used to scan college essays to determine the vocabulary level. It's a standardized and proven method and Trump*'s speaking  vocabulary is that of a 4trh grader (an eight or nine year old). [For comparison Obama speaks at the 9th grade level.]

Is there some test or way to measure the level of cognizance displayed by this statement:

"We have the greatest testing program in the world. We've developed it over a period of time. And we're up to almost 30 million tests," Trump said.
"That means we're going to have more cases. If we didn't want to test, or if we didn't test, we wouldn't have cases. But we have cases because we test. Deaths are down. We have one of the lowest mortality rates."

Because I'm wondering if this is possibly a preschool level of reasoning. Somewhere between object permanence and shoe tying.

Oh, and Mr. President, "Peek-A-Boo!"
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2020-06-26 2:46:51 PM  

arrogantbastich: Gov. Phil Murphy told CNBC his quarantine order would not have applied to Trump, because "by any definition the president of the United States is an essential worker."


\scoff


When does he plan to start working?
 
2020-06-26 2:48:28 PM  
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2020-06-26 2:54:39 PM  

arrogantbastich: Gov. Phil Murphy told CNBC his quarantine order would not have applied to Trump, because "by any definition the president of the United States is an essential worker."


\scoff


Challenge: requires the definition of work to include "rage tweeting while on the shiatter"
 
2020-06-26 2:57:16 PM  
A long time ago came a man and his quack
The healthiest candidate since they ever kept track
The escalator ride, boy, he thought he was the best
Full of bullshiat and ignorance

He built an image and a rabid core
And he ploughed up some porn stars and maybe a whore
The other candidate took their withering attack
And she never went further, no, but she wrote she looked back

Then came the Christians, then came the fools
Then came the lawyers that piss on the rules
Then came Ukraine and the NAZIs with torches
That look like they came from their mothers' back porches

Then came the tariffs - then Russian ore
Farmers felt the hard times due to Donald's trade war
The MSM sang a song about the world outside
Fox News' river of shiat was so deep and so wide
Like a rolling river...

And my radio says watch for sore throat and a wheese
People drop like flies in the factories
There's six lanes of highway
Nothing but open road...

I used to like to go to out to eat but they shut it down
I got a right to go to out eat but there's no food here to be found
Yes, and they say "Don's gonna have to pay what's owed".
Don't hold your breath till any money's bestowed

All the masks upon the faces and the plummeting polls
He can always fly away, but knows that Russia's too cold
He can hear his critics singing out the fed penal code
All the way down the telegraph road

You know I'd sooner forget but I remember those nights
When shopping wasn't a roll of the dice on ending my life
I had no mask around my neck, no elastic in my hair
Now the death toll'shiat six figures and you don't seem to care

I believe that karma's a biatch and they'll take you away
From out of the White House to Guantanamo Bay
From these shivers of virus these shivers of pain
From the anger that lives on streets with numbers, not names
Cause you've run every red light on all that is sane
I've seen our frustration explode into flames
And I don't want to see it again...
From all of these signs saying sorry but we're closed
All the way down the telegraph road
 
2020-06-26 3:04:26 PM  

brantgoose: In his pajamas and smoking jacket.


Smocking jacket, Pepe, smocking.  The moose inside your head should have told you.

/love your work
//big fan
///Why won't your country please invade?  You will be welcomed as liberators.
 
2020-06-26 3:12:06 PM  

arrogantbastich: Gov. Phil Murphy told CNBC his quarantine order would not have applied to Trump, because "by any definition the president of the United States is an essential worker."


\scoff


media.giphy.comView Full Size


Bill Barr finds this amusing.
 
2020-06-26 3:16:05 PM  

arrogantbastich: Gov. Phil Murphy told CNBC his quarantine order would not have applied to Trump, because "by any definition the president of the United States is an essential worker."


\scoff


The quarantine order may not, but the mask requirement does.

Trump would love to be "quarantined" at his golf course for two weeks, it's a hell of an excuse to do nothing. But he would have to wear a mask the whole time, and Impeached President Snowflake can't have that.
 
2020-06-26 3:49:35 PM  

Dewey Fidalgo: arrogantbastich: Gov. Phil Murphy told CNBC his quarantine order would not have applied to Trump, because "by any definition the president of the United States is an essential worker."


\scoff

Except the only reason President Fat Ass would go to Jersey is to golf, right?


More like excavating the green if that surrepticiously taken video from a few weeks back is any indication of his ability.
 
2020-06-26 3:52:39 PM  

arrogantbastich: Gov. Phil Murphy told CNBC his quarantine order would not have applied to Trump, because "by any definition the president of the United States is an essential worker."


\scoff


Sure but after a few workers at Bedminster turn up positive the location could be declared a hotspot.
 
2020-06-26 4:09:54 PM  

arrogantbastich: Gov. Phil Murphy told CNBC his quarantine order would not have applied to Trump, because "by any definition the president of the United States is an essential worker."


\scoff


He was going to stay at his golf resort and play golf, which doesn't sound like essential work to me.  He's an essential golfer?
 
2020-06-26 4:32:11 PM  
As my old man used to say before he left this shiatty world, "You wouldn't know work if it bit you on the ass"
 
2020-06-26 6:02:36 PM  
Sorry, Jersey's closed.

Beached whale outside shoulda told ya.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-06-26 6:14:07 PM  

c152atn67: My guess is the real reason is that the optics suck to see POTUS going to golf/vacation while cases spike in swing states like AZ, FL, and NC.


That's never stopped him before.
 
2020-06-26 8:33:37 PM  

Dewey Fidalgo: arrogantbastich: Gov. Phil Murphy told CNBC his quarantine order would not have applied to Trump, because "by any definition the president of the United States is an essential worker."


\scoff

Except the only reason President Fat Ass would go to Jersey is to golf, right?


Right and storms are predicted for this weekend.
 
2020-06-26 11:46:28 PM  
This was the week where Trump surrendered to New Jersey and to Russia.
 
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