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(BBC-US)   You don't often hear the term 'Stowaway Golfers', except in Scotland   (bbc.com) divider line
    More: Fail, Firth of Clyde, CalMac ferries, Caledonian MacBrayne, Isle of Arran, Great Cumbrae, Largs, group of golfers, non-essential journeys  
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2256 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Jun 2020 at 6:50 PM (9 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2020-06-06 7:45:15 PM  
12 votes:
Golf is a highly addictive drug. Far worse than Crack, Meth or Heroin. Addicts care little for rules and regulations and will do whatever is necessary to get their next fix.

About 25 years ago I got a rather troubling phone call from some friends of my brother's. (Over the years I had gotten used to troubling phone calls about my brother, so one more did not especially alarm me.) They had not seen my brother in weeks. I knew my brothers's "girlfriend" (a dominatrix who rented my parents' bedroom from him, but that's another story) had invited him to vacation with her family in North Carolina. I had agreed to drive him from North Carolina back home if he needed me to (he very rarely drives, getting easily carsick). That agreement had completely slipped my mind, and since he hadn't called me, I assumed he'd found another way home. So I assured my brother's friends that I would drive up to the address in Pinehurst, pick him up and continue on to his home, a distance of twelve hundred miles.

I arrived at the place in Pinehurst late in the evening. It was a rental right by the golf course. I can only describe it as a golf crack house. It smelled of rancid pizza and stopped up plumbing. Golf bags, Chinese takeout containers and half-filled coffee cups lay strewn among a noxious layer of unwashed shirts and underwear which covered everything. A few residents were heading out to a lit course to night-golf. Others had just returned. My brother and his friend and a couple of other derelicts were lying on a couch and air mattress telling stories about how they salvaged birdies out of bunkers, etc.

I tore my brother away and had a frank discussion with him. Turned out he'd been there almost a month. In the morning I drove him home to dry out. He hasn't picked up a club since.
 
2020-06-06 7:18:25 PM  
7 votes:
 Correct me if I'm wrong Sandy, but if I kill all the golfers they'll lock me up and throw away the key.
 
2020-06-06 7:28:51 PM  
3 votes:

gameshowhost: Correct me if I'm wrong Sandy, but if I kill all the golfers they'll lock me up and throw away the key.


and we're done. Thread closed Gopher out front should have told you
 
2020-06-06 7:21:44 PM  
3 votes:
s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.comView Full Size
 
2020-06-07 9:11:52 AM  
1 vote:
They invented the game, you know. Only they call it "gaahhf".
 
2020-06-06 8:31:38 PM  
1 vote:
It would be more Scottish if they did this to save 5 pounds or something.
 
2020-06-06 8:16:52 PM  
1 vote:
Stowaway golfers is the name of my Haircut 100  death metal ska band
 
2020-06-06 7:49:43 PM  
1 vote:
Golfing is a sickness! A golfer is worse than a drug addict. A drug addict won't trap you at the bar, wedding, funeral or urinal about every toke or injection they imbibed In the past week. But a golfer will! It's a evil game I tell you! Evil!
 
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