Skip to content
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Slate)   "I finally fixed the song Glory Days"   (slate.com) divider line
    More: Amusing, Bruce Springsteen, Pitcher, Curveball, E Street Band, Glory Days, Fastball, Baseball, youth baseball  
•       •       •

3039 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 31 May 2020 at 6:50 PM (4 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



74 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2020-05-31 3:40:16 PM  
so that was the dumbest thing I read on the internet in quite a long time. thanks Slate!
 
2020-05-31 3:58:35 PM  
Bruce told me to tell you to stop farking with his songs or the lawyers are getting involved.
 
2020-05-31 4:07:56 PM  
You burned all the originals, seized every LP, cassette and bootleg analog copy, unleashed a malware that will destroy every digital version, and have surrounded the earth with MiB little flashy things to wipe it from our memories?
 
2020-05-31 4:13:59 PM  
Never thought it was *about* baseball.  Never thought "Blind Man in the Bleachers" was about football, either
 
2020-05-31 4:21:50 PM  
I see somebody at Slate was one article short of quota for the month.
 
2020-05-31 4:35:38 PM  
Well everything is fine in the world now
 
2020-05-31 4:43:21 PM  
White people/first world problems.  Dude.  WTF?  It's a song.  Get over yourself.
 
2020-05-31 5:03:54 PM  
Who else hasn't listened to that song since about 1985?

You know who else revels in his Glory Days?

Fark user imageView Full Size


/Time slips away
//Leaves you with nothing, mister
///But boring stories of.....glory days
 
2020-05-31 5:04:55 PM  
OK, now do that stupid Lee Greenwood song:

I'm proud to be an American,
Where at least I know I'm free...

"American" is a person, but the presumed antecedent of "Where" would be "America" which doesn't appear in the lyrics.

Better yet, just get rid of the stupid farking song.
 
2020-05-31 5:11:12 PM  
Well, that was certainly something.
 
2020-05-31 5:17:05 PM  
By switching the radio station?
 
2020-05-31 5:46:34 PM  
Better song.
Salad Days
Youtube 4LQ45Chpj-4
 
2020-05-31 5:53:33 PM  

Prank Call of Cthulhu: OK, now do that stupid Lee Greenwood song:

I'm proud to be an American,
Where at least I know I'm free...

"American" is a person, but the presumed antecedent of "Where" would be "America" which doesn't appear in the lyrics.

Better yet, just get rid of the stupid farking song.


CSB: when I did my Citizenship ceremony, that song was playing on a loop while we waited for our turn to take the pledge.

ON. A. LOOP.
 
2020-05-31 6:11:04 PM  
"Glory Days" is a comic reverie about the power of nostalgia to make us laugh instead of cry.

Do...do I not know what Glory Days is about? I thought it was about people wasting their present by living in the past.
 
2020-05-31 6:19:07 PM  
Cool.
Next, change "Badlands" to "Bad Clams".
 
2020-05-31 6:44:59 PM  
What.a.dick.
 
2020-05-31 6:54:04 PM  
By removing it from history?
 
2020-05-31 6:56:42 PM  

HugeMistake: Prank Call of Cthulhu: OK, now do that stupid Lee Greenwood song:

I'm proud to be an American,
Where at least I know I'm free...

"American" is a person, but the presumed antecedent of "Where" would be "America" which doesn't appear in the lyrics.

Better yet, just get rid of the stupid farking song.

CSB: when I did my Citizenship ceremony, that song was playing on a loop while we waited for our turn to take the pledge.

ON. A. LOOP.


Were you thinking you might have made a huge mistake?
 
2020-05-31 7:00:23 PM  

SpaceyCat: White people/first world problems.  Dude.  WTF?  It's a song.  Get over yourself.


Yes only white people in first world countries play baseball.
 
2020-05-31 7:00:50 PM  
I, too, stop by Subby's mom's for a few drinks after she puts the kid to bed.
/sorry, Bobby
 
2020-05-31 7:08:01 PM  
i threw a frisbee curve. never had a wham-o
 
2020-05-31 7:19:28 PM  
If this kind of tedious drivel were written about Star Trek or TMNT instead of The Sacred American Team Sports we'd be calling this farker a pathetic, pedantic nerd and rightly so.
 
2020-05-31 7:19:58 PM  
So Nettles didn't get him in the bottom of the ninth?
 
2020-05-31 7:23:33 PM  
"Well there's a girl that lives up the block..."

That?

Who. Who.

/been bothering me for 35 years
 
2020-05-31 7:26:12 PM  
This guy thinks a fastball doesn't make batters look foolish?  Has  he never heard of Nolan Ryan.
 
2020-05-31 7:28:14 PM  
One question: This is so incredibly, purposefully, me-me-me stupid how is it not the lead on The Ringer right now?
 
2020-05-31 7:28:41 PM  
Thinking about....glory holes...

Well you'll pass em by glory holes....

Don't get your jizz in a young girl's eye glory holes.....
 
2020-05-31 7:29:38 PM  
This song used to get played as part of the warmup music before a nearby Junior College's baseball games.

An odd choice, telling the players their lives have already peaked when they're supposed to be getting revved up to play.
 
2020-05-31 7:30:18 PM  
Slate. For when garden variety pedantry just doesn't satisfy your ego anymore.
 
2020-05-31 7:36:08 PM  
"Speedball" is a little archaic, but it's folksy. Like a guy from New Jersey singing with a Southern drawl.
 
2020-05-31 7:38:16 PM  
i.pinimg.comView Full Size

Lazlo finished it 1st.
It was originally about cricket.
 
2020-05-31 7:40:22 PM  

stoli n coke: This song used to get played as part of the warmup music before a nearby Junior College's baseball games.

An odd choice, telling the players their lives have already peaked when they're supposed to be getting revved up to play.


Better than Gary Glitter.
 
2020-05-31 7:40:55 PM  

7th Son of a 7th Son: Thinking about....glory holes...

Well you'll pass em by glory holes....

Don't get your jizz in a young girl's eye glory holes.....


It's never a girl on the other side of a glory hole, no matter what you tell yourself.
 
2020-05-31 8:16:06 PM  

FarkaDark: [i.pinimg.com image 850x1062]
Lazlo finished it 1st.
It was originally about cricket.


Right after he wrote "Kokomo, A Seafaring Song"
 
2020-05-31 8:19:42 PM  
The song is obviously fine as is.

Here's a great cover though:

The Avett Brothers "Glory Days" - Hangin' Out On E Street
Youtube kmWIxnVBU7w
 
2020-05-31 8:26:22 PM  
What a pile of shiat.

1.  "Speedball" is a perfectly reasonable synonym for "fastball."  As TFA notes, there are recorded uses of it in august sports publications, including "The Sporting News."

2.  Even if it was a unique creation by Springsteen, it is entirely clear from context what it means.  It's not like he wrote "he could throw that mango lassi by you..."

3.  Nothing in the song suggests that the narrator is sports-oriented to begin with.  Maybe he doesn't know much about baseball beyond the fact that his friend played it and was a good pitcher.  Maybe he's not versed in the nomenclature of pitches, and "speedball" is his best guess is what you'd call a fast pitch.  It's a reasonable assumption for a guy who might not be into all that sportsball.

4.  "Does whiffing on a fastball make a hitter "look like a fool"? I'd argue no."

media.tenor.comView Full Size


You were saying?
 
2020-05-31 8:52:53 PM  
Did someone make it disappear from the face of the earth?
 
2020-05-31 9:01:50 PM  

Uzzah: What a pile of shiat.

1.  "Speedball" is a perfectly reasonable synonym for "fastball."  As TFA notes, there are recorded uses of it in august sports publications, including "The Sporting News."

2.  Even if it was a unique creation by Springsteen, it is entirely clear from context what it means.  It's not like he wrote "he could throw that mango lassi by you..."

3.  Nothing in the song suggests that the narrator is sports-oriented to begin with.  Maybe he doesn't know much about baseball beyond the fact that his friend played it and was a good pitcher.  Maybe he's not versed in the nomenclature of pitches, and "speedball" is his best guess is what you'd call a fast pitch.  It's a reasonable assumption for a guy who might not be into all that sportsball.

4.  "Does whiffing on a fastball make a hitter "look like a fool"? I'd argue no."

[media.tenor.com image 220x229] [View Full Size image _x_]

You were saying?


So what was the additional lyric Bruce cut?


Speedball might make more sense with that additional info.
 
2020-05-31 9:22:10 PM  
So poetic license is next on the chopping block
 
2020-05-31 9:34:58 PM  
"He could throw that speedball by you", is lyrically more smooth than "he could throw that fastball by you". The long e in speedball can be held for an extra half beat and make the line scan smoothly. Fastball, with the short a, just doesn't have that same feeling when sang.  Plus, fastball has 3 consonant sounds in a row; the s, t, and b, making it just an awkward word to sing. I'm sure Springsteen took all of this into account when he wrote the song. He's a pretty smart guy.
And yeah, stop using Born on the USA for anything patriotic. I'm sure that goes without saying, but I said it.
 
2020-05-31 9:35:46 PM  

Uzzah: 2. Even if it was a unique creation by Springsteen, it is entirely clear from context what it means. It's not like he wrote "he could throw that mango lassi by you..."


Well no, that's Busta Rhymes - completely different artist!

Busta Rhymes Arrested After Charge of Throwing Protein Shake at Fellow Gym-Goer
 
2020-05-31 9:39:40 PM  

Cubs300: "He could throw that speedball by you", is lyrically more smooth than "he could throw that fastball by you". The long e in speedball can be held for an extra half beat and make the line scan smoothly. Fastball, with the short a, just doesn't have that same feeling when sang.  Plus, fastball has 3 consonant sounds in a row; the s, t, and b, making it just an awkward word to sing. I'm sure Springsteen took all of this into account when he wrote the song. He's a pretty smart guy.
And yeah, stop using Born on the USA for anything patriotic. I'm sure that goes without saying, but I said it.


One Christmas in a department store the pa was playing Christmas Day from Tommy. So I'm thinking nothing goes without saying anymore.
 
2020-05-31 9:52:02 PM  

Crewmannumber6: Cubs300: "He could throw that speedball by you", is lyrically more smooth than "he could throw that fastball by you". The long e in speedball can be held for an extra half beat and make the line scan smoothly. Fastball, with the short a, just doesn't have that same feeling when sang.  Plus, fastball has 3 consonant sounds in a row; the s, t, and b, making it just an awkward word to sing. I'm sure Springsteen took all of this into account when he wrote the song. He's a pretty smart guy.
And yeah, stop using Born on the USA for anything patriotic. I'm sure that goes without saying, but I said it.

One Christmas in a department store the pa was playing Christmas Day from Tommy. So I'm thinking nothing goes without saying anymore.


0_o
 
2020-05-31 9:53:52 PM  
Did he have someone re-record the vocals without the annoying nasally whine?
 
2020-05-31 10:24:35 PM  
What a stellar article, Slate. Now write one about how rain on your wedding day isn't so much ironic as it is sucky.
 
2020-05-31 10:25:56 PM  
I don't know which is more pathetic, the 35 years the author spent worrying about that song or the 2 minutes I spent reading TFA.
 
2020-05-31 10:31:11 PM  

bearded clamorer: Cool.
Next, change "Badlands" to "Bad Clams".


And Candy's Room to Candys Womb.
 
2020-05-31 10:32:07 PM  
You want to fix someone's song lyric, have a go at this one:

Till the stars fall from the sky
For you and I.
 
2020-05-31 10:49:53 PM  
I knew exactly what the article was about when I read the headline. That line has bothered me for 35 years as well, but really only when I hear the song again. And I've never felt an urge to write an article about it or anything. The author's "solution" does not make the song better.

But using fastball would have been more appropriate than speedball, even if speedball is a technically correct (the best kind of correct) term and/or works better lyrically.

/I have spoken
 
2020-05-31 11:03:56 PM  

stoli n coke: This song used to get played as part of the warmup music before a nearby Junior College's baseball games.

An odd choice, telling the players their lives have already peaked when they're supposed to be getting revved up to play.


Better than telling them their wholes lives are centered on baseball, then they're depressed after they stop climbing towards the pros.  Which later means they become totals dicks to their sons, trying to make them the superstars they'll never be.  I think it is better to let them know now, this is a good time in their lives, enjoy it for all it is worth.  Have fun swapping stories later with friends.
 
Displayed 50 of 74 comments


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all


View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking





On Twitter




In Other Media
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.