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(FOX6Now)   Most six-year-olds digging in the dirt find rocks, old bottlecaps, maybe even some lost coins. Then there's this six-year-old   (fox6now.com) divider line
    More: Spiffy, Canaan, 6-year-old boy, 3,500-year-old clay tablet, Imri Elya, Ancient Egypt, underground chambers, archaeological site, Israel Antiquities Authority  
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2837 clicks; posted to Fandom » on 31 May 2020 at 10:30 AM (21 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



36 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2020-05-31 7:59:32 AM  
Did he find a Peter Gabriel video?

Peter Gabriel - Digging In The Dirt
Youtube X0C3DHp36zc
 
2020-05-31 8:15:34 AM  
Archaeologist  in the making right there.  :-)
 
2020-05-31 8:48:50 AM  
Without reading the article, based on the Spiffy tag, I'm gonna guess Native American peace pipe from circa 1640.

Am I close?
 
2020-05-31 8:51:17 AM  
I only missed it by about 6000 miles and 2000 years.

In some scales of time and distance, I was really REALLY close.
 
2020-05-31 8:53:02 AM  
What was that dude arrested for, having a criminally huge wang?
 
2020-05-31 9:54:14 AM  
That will be well hung in a museum.
 
2020-05-31 10:34:45 AM  
FTFA: "...clay tablet depicting an ancient captive and his captor..."

...and a baby's arm holding an apple.
 
2020-05-31 10:42:37 AM  
Can you tell us region-locked people what that kid found?
 
2020-05-31 10:48:30 AM  

Cheese eating surrender monkey: Can you tell us region-locked people what that kid found?


Fark user imageView Full Size


An ancient clay tablet with a primitive depiction of a soldier and a captive who - incidentally - has a massive floppy uncut schlong hanging down past his knee.
 
2020-05-31 10:48:40 AM  

Cheese eating surrender monkey: Can you tell us region-locked people what that kid found?


Peace pipe.
 
2020-05-31 10:49:25 AM  
DAMMIT pkjun!
 
2020-05-31 10:54:01 AM  
 
2020-05-31 10:54:07 AM  
They'll go back to where he found it and find another tablet depicting the man kneeling on the neck of his captive.
 
2020-05-31 10:58:32 AM  

pkjun: has a massive floppy uncut schlong hanging down past his knee.


Ya rly.  I was wondering on the psychological mindset for that.  I mean, hey he's a captive, but he has this huge dick.  Hmmmmm.....
 
2020-05-31 11:04:52 AM  

SpaceyCat: pkjun: has a massive floppy uncut schlong hanging down past his knee.

Ya rly.  I was wondering on the psychological mindset for that.  I mean, hey he's a captive, but he has this huge dick.  Hmmmmm.....


Its a culture thing.  There are penii images found throughtout antiquity, on vases, on sidewalks, on mosaics, etc.  If you get to walk Pompeii, for example, you'll find penis carvings on their sidewalks.  It was all about fertility, and buon fortuna (to the Romans).
 
2020-05-31 11:09:17 AM  

raerae1980: SpaceyCat: pkjun: has a massive floppy uncut schlong hanging down past his knee.

Ya rly.  I was wondering on the psychological mindset for that.  I mean, hey he's a captive, but he has this huge dick.  Hmmmmm.....

Its a culture thing.  There are penii images found throughtout antiquity, on vases, on sidewalks, on mosaics, etc.  If you get to walk Pompeii, for example, you'll find penis carvings on their sidewalks.  It was all about fertility, and buon fortuna (to the Romans).


I read buon as bacon and thought maybe I should give that religion a shot.
 
2020-05-31 11:12:05 AM  

raerae1980: It was all about fertility, and buon fortuna (to the Romans).


That much I knew.  I was more curious about the contradiction of the images.  Captive vs big dick.
 
2020-05-31 11:14:48 AM  

pkjun: Cheese eating surrender monkey: Can you tell us region-locked people what that kid found?

[Fark user image 425x480]

An ancient clay tablet with a primitive depiction of a soldier and a captive who - incidentally - has a massive floppy uncut schlong hanging down past his knee.


jaytkay: Cheese eating surrender monkey: Can you tell us region-locked people what that kid found?

[Fark user image 850x494]

Here are a couple of links in case you can reach them:

Haaretz - Israeli Boy Finds Tablet Immortalizing Victorious Canaanite and His Naked Captive

Smithsonian Mag - Six-Year-Old Boy Discovers Rare Canaanite Tablet


Thanks.
 
2020-05-31 11:22:38 AM  

raerae1980: SpaceyCat: pkjun: has a massive floppy uncut schlong hanging down past his knee.

Ya rly.  I was wondering on the psychological mindset for that.  I mean, hey he's a captive, but he has this huge dick.  Hmmmmm.....

Its a culture thing.  There are penii images found throughtout antiquity, on vases, on sidewalks, on mosaics, etc.  If you get to walk Pompeii, for example, you'll find penis carvings on their sidewalks.  It was all about fertility, and buon fortuna (to the Romans).


That's sort of the interesting part. Phallic images are everywhere in antiquity but almost always represent some sort of power. The Roman fascinus was a good-luck charm against curses and the Evil Eye; the Greek herm statues warded evil countryside spirits away from cities; Osiris' erect phallus represented his power of life and regeneration; the lingam of Shiva represents his omnipotent power to intervene and transform the world and was originally a phallus.

So, aight, I'm an antique dude in the Levant, and dicks are power. Gotta have that Big Dick Energy. So I wanna celebrate how Our Guys are more powerful than Their Guys, so I make Our Guy super strong with a square jaw and a full head of hair, and Their Guy is skinny and emaciated and bald and his arms are tied behind his back and he's stripped naked, of course...revealing his humongous penis hanging down past his knees.

I am generally curious about the message there. I'd think "well he's emphasising the nakedness and vulnerability of the captive", but that seems at cross purposes with the general "dicks mean power" thing in antiquity, and the rest of the figure is roughly proportional to a real person. Or it could be "Look, we're so tough we even beat up the Big Dick Guys" is a possibility, but if you're emphasising the power of the enemy you've defeated why make him so scrawny and sickly looking?

Either that or like maybe there was just this one captive with a memorably big dick and everyone was like, "oh yeah remember when Hapseth captured that guy with the dick."
 
2020-05-31 11:28:45 AM  
https://jewishstandard.timesofisrael.​c​om/israeli-boy-discovers-ancient-table​t-during-family-trip-in-southern-israe​l/
The 1.1-inch by 1.1-inch clay tablet is engraved with a depiction of a man wearing a skirt leading a naked captive whose hands are tied behind the back. The tablet seems to indicate ethnic differences between captor and captive; the captor's hair is curled and his face is full, while the captive is thin and his face elongated.

Fark user imageView Full Size

Is the really long penis supposed to be an ethnic difference or was it emphasized so its limpness would be a sign of defeat and humiliation?
 
2020-05-31 11:34:32 AM  

pkjun: Cheese eating surrender monkey: Can you tell us region-locked people what that kid found?

[Fark user image 425x480]

An ancient clay tablet with a primitive depiction of a soldier and a captive who - incidentally - has a massive floppy uncut schlong hanging down past his knee.


Ezekiel 23:20
 
2020-05-31 11:39:06 AM  

HairBolus: https://jewishstandard.timesofisrael.​c​om/israeli-boy-discovers-ancient-table​t-during-family-trip-in-southern-israe​l/
The 1.1-inch by 1.1-inch clay tablet is engraved with a depiction of a man wearing a skirt leading a naked captive whose hands are tied behind the back. The tablet seems to indicate ethnic differences between captor and captive; the captor's hair is curled and his face is full, while the captive is thin and his face elongated.

[Fark user image image 850x476]
Is the really long penis supposed to be an ethnic difference or was it emphasized so its limpness would be a sign of defeat and humiliation?


The captive was probably an African slave, based on the hair and enlongated face.
If youve seen the HBO show Rome, theres a scene where a well-endowed slave is brought to the Lady of the house for........reasons :-/   The slave probably was worth more at auction, and was "advertised" as such.    Does this make sense? 😬
 
2020-05-31 11:58:15 AM  
Biggus Dickus, The Early Years
 
2020-05-31 12:11:03 PM  

HairBolus: Is the really long penis supposed to be an ethnic difference or was it emphasized so its limpness would be a sign of defeat and humiliation?


It was common in the time of the Pharoah's to humiliate their subjects by having a platypus gnaw on their genitals.

This was a question on "Smarter than a 5th Grader."

Even Jeff Foxworthy knew this.
 
2020-05-31 12:21:57 PM  

WordsnCollision: Biggus Dickus, The Early Years


He'll have a wife, you know...
 
2020-05-31 12:41:58 PM  
The guy on the tablet was being arrested for indecent exposure?

/Don't look, Ethel!
/Boogedy boogedy.
 
2020-05-31 12:50:28 PM  

raerae1980: HairBolus: https://jewishstandard.timesofisrael.c​om/israeli-boy-discovers-ancient-table​t-during-family-trip-in-southern-israe​l/
The 1.1-inch by 1.1-inch clay tablet is engraved with a depiction of a man wearing a skirt leading a naked captive whose hands are tied behind the back. The tablet seems to indicate ethnic differences between captor and captive; the captor's hair is curled and his face is full, while the captive is thin and his face elongated.

[Fark user image image 850x476]
Is the really long penis supposed to be an ethnic difference or was it emphasized so its limpness would be a sign of defeat and humiliation?

The captive was probably an African slave, based on the hair and enlongated face.
If youve seen the HBO show Rome, theres a scene where a well-endowed slave is brought to the Lady of the house for........reasons :-/   The slave probably was worth more at auction, and was "advertised" as such.    Does this make sense? 😬


Ha, I finally got to that show a couple of weeks ago due to the 'rona.  And that was the scene I thought of when I saw this tablet.  On another note I thought they did a good job with the historical points and it was well casted.  All the major battles were off screen though so that was disappoint.
 
2020-05-31 1:06:24 PM  

Igor Jakovsky: raerae1980: HairBolus: https://jewishstandard.timesofisrael.c​om/israeli-boy-discovers-ancient-table​t-during-family-trip-in-southern-israe​l/
The 1.1-inch by 1.1-inch clay tablet is engraved with a depiction of a man wearing a skirt leading a naked captive whose hands are tied behind the back. The tablet seems to indicate ethnic differences between captor and captive; the captor's hair is curled and his face is full, while the captive is thin and his face elongated.

[Fark user image image 850x476]
Is the really long penis supposed to be an ethnic difference or was it emphasized so its limpness would be a sign of defeat and humiliation?

The captive was probably an African slave, based on the hair and enlongated face.
If youve seen the HBO show Rome, theres a scene where a well-endowed slave is brought to the Lady of the house for........reasons :-/   The slave probably was worth more at auction, and was "advertised" as such.    Does this make sense? 😬

Ha, I finally got to that show a couple of weeks ago due to the 'rona.  And that was the scene I thought of when I saw this tablet.  On another note I thought they did a good job with the historical points and it was well casted.  All the major battles were off screen though so that was disappoint.


Yeah, i liked Rome.  I thought they did a good job in depicting the drama, even though they rushed through it.  Lol!  The Netflix series is also pretty good, although their pick for Cleopatra sucked.
 
2020-05-31 1:29:06 PM  
media.giphy.comView Full Size
 
2020-05-31 1:30:28 PM  
Hey, if there were a 5,000 year history of various empires ruling my town, I could find shiat like that too.
 
2020-05-31 2:31:13 PM  

pkjun: Cheese eating surrender monkey: Can you tell us region-locked people what that kid found?

[Fark user image image 425x480]

An ancient clay tablet with a primitive depiction of a soldier and a captive who - incidentally - has a massive floppy uncut schlong hanging down past his knee.


How do you claim stolen property?

I put that in the trunk.
 
2020-05-31 3:44:27 PM  

raerae1980: If youve seen the HBO show Rome, theres a scene where a well-endowed slave is brought to the Lady of the house for........reasons :-/


That scene is anachronistic.

The Romans considered large penises uncivilized and barbaric and would not have appreciated them for gifts or sex. But to her credit it was probably intended to be an insult/gag gift, as Atia despised Servilia.
 
2020-05-31 4:40:10 PM  
We have captured Biggus Dickus. Shall we throw him to the ground?
 
2020-05-31 5:07:55 PM  

Ishkur: raerae1980: If youve seen the HBO show Rome, theres a scene where a well-endowed slave is brought to the Lady of the house for........reasons :-/

That scene is anachronistic.

The Romans considered large penises uncivilized and barbaric and would not have appreciated them for gifts or sex. But to her credit it was probably intended to be an insult/gag gift, as Atia despised Servilia.


The Roman men may have thought that.  Their views on penis sizes were probably similar to the Greeks, and a lot of what we know about their standards of beauty are from the male perspective, as they ruled society.    So the depictions in art are how the men in Roman/Greek society viewed beauty.
But I specifically said Lady of the House ;-)
 
2020-05-31 5:27:53 PM  
Wow - someone found something old at an archaeological dig site?
 
2020-05-31 5:31:13 PM  
I think the first person is a lady (are those boobies?). It is obviously the oldest S&M pic ever recovered!
 
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