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(NBC News)   ♪ Sneeze and a haircut / 91 exposed ♪   (nbcnews.com) divider line
    More: Sick, NBC, hair stylist, Springfield, Missouri, Missouri's pandemic reopening, The Salon, CVS/pharmacy, CVS Caremark, good news  
•       •       •

4964 clicks; posted to Main » and Politics » on 23 May 2020 at 1:24 PM (2 days ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



111 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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2 days ago  
Well every reopening has a few hiccups, thus probably isn't the start of a trend. I mean low paid workers have plenty of options to fall back on if sick. This is a one time thing. No one else would go to work sick. Just because they'll get evicted and starve if they don't, doesn't mean they will.

But even if they do, it's for the greater good. People need haircuts. You realize that a million bilgillion people died last year from lack of haircut acess, and that was in Arkansas alone. That's like 12 Vietnams or 3 Bengazis.

And frankly this all Obama's fault anyways, because he ordered the systematic execution of an investigation into paradigm of the aforementioned systemactic execution. It goes deep people!

/need a new job, thinking about applying as a White House press secretary.
//the trick is to be dry enough in sarcasm so the repubs don't catch on.
///like early Colbert.
 
2 days ago  
Deep pockets target. Great Clips to be buried under a shiatstorm of a hundred lawsuits - or possibly even a class action suit - in 3..2....

disgonabegud.gif
 
2 days ago  
two bit the dust?
 
2 days ago  
This will happen all over the place with restrictions lifted.  This story will become the norm.
 
2 days ago  
I'm sure they'll handle this the same way the would an HIV positive person sleeping around without telling anyone. Right?
 
2 days ago  

Harlee: Deep pockets target. Great Clips to be buried under a shiatstorm of a hundred lawsuits - or possibly even a class action suit - in 3..2....

disgonabegud.gif


Indemnity legislation in 3... 2...
 
2 days ago  

Harlee: Deep pockets target. Great Clips to be buried under a shiatstorm of a hundred lawsuits - or possibly even a class action suit - in 3..2....

disgonabegud.gif


If I remember right, the locations are franchises, but the stylists are independent contractors who rent the chair.
 
2 days ago  
That'll teach you a lesson, Karen.

Well, probably not, but it should.
 
2 days ago  

LordOfThePings: Harlee: Deep pockets target. Great Clips to be buried under a shiatstorm of a hundred lawsuits - or possibly even a class action suit - in 3..2....

disgonabegud.gif

Indemnity legislation in 3... 2...


Good way to kill the industry. Do it.
 
2 days ago  
Hahahaha *SNORT*
 
2 days ago  
Sneeze and a haircut? No shiat.
 
2 days ago  
Fark user imageView Full Size
I wonder who the moron is who can't park their yellow SUV.
 
2 days ago  
I really don't get the haircut thing. Even if you think this is a hoax - why risk it for a haircut? The downside is permanent lung damage or death. The upside is...shorter hair?
 
2 days ago  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2 days ago  
Been three months since I had a haircut. I'm starting to look very stylish for the year 1980. Soon I'll head into the 70s.
 
2 days ago  
The government needs to use the wartime procurement act to get every household a military style electric hair clipper.  Then mandate the only allowed haircut is a #2 or shorter buzz cut.  And it must be done at home.  Then outlaw hair salons and barber shops.

Problem solved.
 
2 days ago  
You know the old saying: "you gotta break a few eggs if you're gonna make a haircut".  Oh, well, let boys be boys.
 
2 days ago  

Bermuda59: [Fark user image 850x554]I wonder who the moron is who can't park their yellow SUV.


you can't make me park at a slight angle!
 
2 days ago  

Bermuda59: [Fark user image image 850x554]I wonder who the moron is who can't park their yellow SUV.


Every yellow suv owner.
 
2 days ago  

I hereby demand that I be given a Fark account: [Fark user image image 850x285]


Too bad there isn't a sad button, cause this shiat they are doing aint smart or funny....
 
2 days ago  

Bermuda59: [Fark user image 850x554]I wonder who the moron is who can't park their yellow SUV.


All of them.
 
2 days ago  
Where are the followup articles with these people?  When one of these morons insists on reopening (especially if they make a point of pride about flouting guidelines, denying service to people with masks, etc.), then when their friends and neighbors are sick or dying, follow up with them.

I don't mean just print the number of cases.  I mean get in there and talk to these asshats.  Ask them point blank if that week or two of sales was worth those lives.  Ask them if it's still a hoax.  Rub their noses in it.  And put it on the front page.

/specific case, but a general rant.
 
2 days ago  
She thought not working would cause money problems just wait until the lawsuits.
 
2 days ago  

sozelle: That'll teach you a lesson, Karen.

Well, probably not, but it should.


It's a known fact that if a karen fails to maintain her tight haircut standards, she devolves to a brenda, and is -3 for attack vs. managers.
 
2 days ago  

AmbassadorBooze: The government needs to use the wartime procurement act to get every household a military style electric hair clipper.  Then mandate the only allowed haircut is a #2 or shorter buzz cut.  And it must be done at home.  Then outlaw hair salons and barber shops.

Problem solved.


It's difficult enough for me to look past my wife's Cruella de Ville hair coloring right now. Now you want her to look like someone from the first part of Full Metal Jacket?
 
2 days ago  

Bermuda59: [Fark user image 850x554]I wonder who the moron is who can't park their yellow SUV.


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2 days ago  
" The salon was closed for sanitizing and deep cleaning, they said. Goddard said he was pleased with the location's response and that it's 'safe to go there' now. "

What could go wrong?

viralviralvideos.comView Full Size

/wrong again
 
2 days ago  

mononymous: I hereby demand that I be given a Fark account: [Fark user image image 850x285]

Too bad there isn't a sad button, cause this shiat they are doing aint smart or funny....


We need an "Are you farking kidding me?" button.
 
2 days ago  
So they were both wearing masks, so maybe it didn't get transmitted, but most stylists and customers talk with each other, especially if they are long term clients and know each other pretty well. Talking with a mask on might still allow some transmission. I guess they'll find out, since they know exactly who got haircuts with that stylist during that time period.
 
2 days ago  

AmbassadorBooze: The government needs to use the wartime procurement act to get every household a military style electric hair clipper.  Then mandate the only allowed haircut is a #2 or shorter buzz cut.  And it must be done at home.  Then outlaw hair salons and barber shops.

Problem solved.


I use a number 7

Wear it short or wear it long

In between is a pain in the ass
 
2 days ago  
I'm a Farkette with long naturally blond hair that I get cut and the crown partially highlighted every 3-4 months. I'm now on month 4 and I used Sun In to do my own highlights. It worked OK. My hair is now longer and tangles easier than if I get my cuts on time, but I could very easily go another few months without a cut or highlight. I get that not everyone has this luxury. Even the best haircut always becomes a bad hairstyle after a certain amount of time goes by.
 
2 days ago  
I went to Great Clips on Wednesday, so I'm getting a kick out of these replies . . .


/ nuttin'
// I got it
/// was impressed by their operation, actually
 
2 days ago  
Do people really get haircuts all that frequently?  I could see that men might, if their jobs require it, but really, how often do you need a trim and how critical is it?  So many people upset about haircuts and I can't even remember my last one.  Mostly because women's cuts are extortionate + tips.  (I get it that women's cuts are harder).
 
2 days ago  

Pfighting Polish: AmbassadorBooze: The government needs to use the wartime procurement act to get every household a military style electric hair clipper.  Then mandate the only allowed haircut is a #2 or shorter buzz cut.  And it must be done at home.  Then outlaw hair salons and barber shops.

Problem solved.

It's difficult enough for me to look past my wife's Cruella de Ville hair coloring right now. Now you want her to look like someone from the first part of Full Metal Jacket?


Yes.  We need uniformity and conformance.  Total submission the the authority of the state, in these unprecidented times.  The goal is to stop the virus spread.  If you can't get a chubby for your wife, that is a sacrifice the overmasters are willing to make.  We are all in this together.
 
2 days ago  

Bowen: I really don't get the haircut thing. Even if you think this is a hoax - why risk it for a haircut? The downside is permanent lung damage or death. The upside is...shorter hair?

Temporarily

shorter hair. A fresh cut looks good on me for like...an hour.
 
2 days ago  

mononymous: sozelle: That'll teach you a lesson, Karen.

Well, probably not, but it should.

It's a known fact that if a karen fails to maintain her tight haircut standards, she devolves to a brenda, and is -3 for attack vs. managers.


And -2 saving throw against "I'm sorry, we can't do that, it's policy"
 
2 days ago  

AmbassadorBooze: Pfighting Polish: AmbassadorBooze: The government needs to use the wartime procurement act to get every household a military style electric hair clipper.  Then mandate the only allowed haircut is a #2 or shorter buzz cut.  And it must be done at home.  Then outlaw hair salons and barber shops.

Problem solved.

It's difficult enough for me to look past my wife's Cruella de Ville hair coloring right now. Now you want her to look like someone from the first part of Full Metal Jacket?

Yes.  We need uniformity and conformance.  Total submission the the authority of the state, in these unprecidented times.  The goal is to stop the virus spread.  If you can't get a chubby for your wife, that is a sacrifice the overmasters are willing to make.  We are all in this together.


What are you parodying?
 
2 days ago  
How many deaths can be expected from 91 cases?

My guess is about 9 (nine).

I hope they are all Trump Hair passengers. But then, Democrats are not well-groomed people according to Republican propagandists, and it's so outrageous when a Democrat gets their hair done (Bill Clinton, Hillary) that the entire R.E.A.L. nation mourns and protests.

On the plus side, you have nine reopening mortuaries and funeral parlours to look forward to for the funerals and memorial services. Lots of sociability, very little socialism.
 
2 days ago  
I lucked out a couple of years ago, when I decided to save money by buying Wahl clippers to shave my own hair. It's easy to learn, and eventually I even shaved my head bald for awhile. Though I found out awhile later that my bald look is not as sexy as The Rock's or Jason Statham's.

So now, I just cut my hair at home. And a coworker recently told me that it's tough to even buy clippers now, though I see that Amazon will guarantee delivery in June.
 
2 days ago  

WillJM8528: AmbassadorBooze: Pfighting Polish: AmbassadorBooze: The government needs to use the wartime procurement act to get every household a military style electric hair clipper.  Then mandate the only allowed haircut is a #2 or shorter buzz cut.  And it must be done at home.  Then outlaw hair salons and barber shops.

Problem solved.

It's difficult enough for me to look past my wife's Cruella de Ville hair coloring right now. Now you want her to look like someone from the first part of Full Metal Jacket?

Yes.  We need uniformity and conformance.  Total submission the the authority of the state, in these unprecidented times.  The goal is to stop the virus spread.  If you can't get a chubby for your wife, that is a sacrifice the overmasters are willing to make.  We are all in this together.

What are you parodying?


Parody?  I believe in the ultimate power of the state.  Individualism is what caused this problem.  People had a desire to travel.  They spread the disease.  They didn't want to be locked down.  They spread the disease.  They wanted pangolin meat to get bigger boners.  The spread the disease.  They have desires to have "hair styles" instead of getting a standard buzz cut.  The spread the disease.  Ideally we would have a borg society where everybody had a vote, but nobody had the power to override the collective.  (And no, we don't need borg queens, that is a retcon that ruined the collective).
 
2 days ago  

tjsands1118: /need a new job, thinking about applying as a White House press secretary.
//the trick is to be dry enough in sarcasm so the repubs don't catch on.
///like early Colbert.


Don't forget to act like a superhero.

"What's everybody looking at?"

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2 days ago  
1.  Keep the quarantine/distancing rules and people working from home until the end of the year.
2.  Open the hair salons and churches for these chuckefarks.
3.  Clarify that public business are able to set their own rules for being open and requiring masks, but if they have few or no restrictions and a mass outbreak is connected to them, they may be held liable.
4.  Allow insurance companies and doctors to refuse care to people who "willingly exposed themselves to infection."
5.  Let the stupid bastards die.
 
2 days ago  

dodecahedron: I'm a Farkette with long naturally blond hair that I get cut and the crown partially highlighted every 3-4 months. I'm now on month 4 and I used Sun In to do my own highlights. It worked OK. My hair is now longer and tangles easier than if I get my cuts on time, but I could very easily go another few months without a cut or highlight. I get that not everyone has this luxury. Even the best haircut always becomes a bad hairstyle after a certain amount of time goes by.


I have a #1 buzz cut, and have had the same cut for 20 years.  Not a single tangle, ever.  Give it a try.

/Almost the same for 20 years.  The front part no longer needs cutting, ever.
 
2 days ago  

gadian: Do people really get haircuts all that frequently?  I could see that men might, if their jobs require it, but really, how often do you need a trim and how critical is it?  So many people upset about haircuts and I can't even remember my last one.  Mostly because women's cuts are extortionate + tips.  (I get it that women's cuts are harder).


I was doing 6-8 weeks and creating a messier floor than most of the other guys.
 
2 days ago  

skinink: I lucked out a couple of years ago, when I decided to save money by buying Wahl clippers to shave my own hair. It's easy to learn, and eventually I even shaved my head bald for awhile. Though I found out awhile later that my bald look is not as sexy as The Rock's or Jason Statham's.

So now, I just cut my hair at home. And a coworker recently told me that it's tough to even buy clippers now, though I see that Amazon will guarantee delivery in June.


I just moved about a month before the shut down and happened to buy Wahl clipper kit and have been pretty good at cutting my own hair, Doing the back successfully is still a work in progress though
 
2 days ago  

AmbassadorBooze: dodecahedron: I'm a Farkette with long naturally blond hair that I get cut and the crown partially highlighted every 3-4 months. I'm now on month 4 and I used Sun In to do my own highlights. It worked OK. My hair is now longer and tangles easier than if I get my cuts on time, but I could very easily go another few months without a cut or highlight. I get that not everyone has this luxury. Even the best haircut always becomes a bad hairstyle after a certain amount of time goes by.

I have a #1 buzz cut, and have had the same cut for 20 years.  Not a single tangle, ever.  Give it a try.

/Almost the same for 20 years.  The front part no longer needs cutting, ever.


Not the most attractive alternative for women, especially as old as I am. I like my long hair.
 
2 days ago  

Bowen: I really don't get the haircut thing. Even if you think this is a hoax - why risk it for a haircut? The downside is permanent lung damage or death. The upside is...shorter hair?


dejareviewer.files.wordpress.comView Full Size


"Some men just want to watch the world perm."
 
2 days ago  

gadian: Do people really get haircuts all that frequently?  I could see that men might, if their jobs require it, but really, how often do you need a trim and how critical is it?  So many people upset about haircuts and I can't even remember my last one.  Mostly because women's cuts are extortionate + tips.  (I get it that women's cuts are harder).


My (dude) hair normally starts to get unruly after six weeks, which is about an inch of growth, so I normally aim for a five-week interval.  My hair hasn't been this long since I got my end-of-college/time-to-face-the-workin​g-world haircut in 2000, and a stiff breeze now makes it look seriously untidy.
 
2 days ago  
Queue some right wing simpleton saying we have no other options other than complete house arrest and allowing people the "freedom" to have to choose to go in to work.

People without money much less health insurance will make this choice more and more often.
 
2 days ago  

Harlee: Deep pockets target. Great Clips to be buried under a shiatstorm of a hundred lawsuits - or possibly even a class action suit - in 3..2....

disgonabegud.gif


I doubt it.  Great Clips are franchised, I'm sure corporate has put out guidance that stated not to do this specifically, so if anything it is on the franchisee.  I'm sure corporate will release a statement condemning the actions.
 
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