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(Yahoo)   Fifty percent of Fox News viewers believe that Bill Gates is plotting to use a mass vaccination campaign against COVID-19 to implant microchips in people and track their movements. FIFTY. PERCENT   (news.yahoo.com) divider line
    More: Facepalm, Donald Trump, Ivana Trump, Donald Trump, Jr., Eric Trump, Plurality voting system, The Apprentice, Trump Organization, Trump International Hotel and Tower  
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1536 clicks; posted to Politics » on 22 May 2020 at 5:29 PM (9 days ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



139 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


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2020-05-22 2:39:27 PM  
They are lost and beyond redemption.
 
2020-05-22 2:42:40 PM  
Gee, I wonder why they think something so obviously ridiculous.
 
2020-05-22 2:43:11 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size


Not mine.  I might have stolen this from some Farker.
 
2020-05-22 2:43:17 PM  
And yet they carry cell phones everywhere they go...
 
2020-05-22 2:46:08 PM  
So there's a good chance a lot of them are going to die?

Not seeing the problem here.
 
2020-05-22 2:46:25 PM  

jasonvatch: And yet they carry cell phones everywhere they go...


Came here to say this.  They don't need to chip people against their will.

People willingly pay them huge amounts of money to carry an even better tracking device .

Be sure to buy the iPhone when it comes out.
 
2020-05-22 2:47:02 PM  
do they have phones? or cars? because those already have a gps. dumb idiots.
 
2020-05-22 2:47:22 PM  
Surprised it's only 50% - my Facebook feed has been overflowing with this for weeks
 
2020-05-22 2:49:39 PM  
Guessing Polio will make a come back in the US in the next few years in the same group.
 
2020-05-22 2:51:07 PM  
Dumbasses.  That chip has been in the flu shot for years.
 
2020-05-22 2:51:36 PM  
We were the only country to have walked on the moon. And now this.

How fallen are the mighty.
 
2020-05-22 2:52:28 PM  
This perpetuation of stupidity is a clear and present danger to the country. Time to unveil those FEMA re-education camps.
 
2020-05-22 3:05:51 PM  
I'm disappointed that the asshole mortality rate hasn't increased astronomically
 
2020-05-22 3:08:47 PM  
YEAH!! I clicked that link on Facebook years ago and he never gave me my $5,000. That guy is pure evil!

Burn the witch!
 
2020-05-22 3:27:38 PM  
Please. Bill Gates doesn't need implanted microchips to track you if you use Office, Skype, an Xbox, or any number of other things.
 
2020-05-22 3:28:48 PM  

FlashHarry: They are lost and beyond redemption.


They may need to be put down like rabid dogs.
 
2020-05-22 3:33:31 PM  
Hey Fox viewers: Mass delusions may have lots of believers, but it's still a delusion.
 
2020-05-22 3:57:48 PM  
How many of them carry Android or Apple smartphones on their person everywhere they go?
 
2020-05-22 4:12:35 PM  

ecmoRandomNumbers: FlashHarry: They are lost and beyond redemption.

They may need to be put down like rabid dogs.


I'd say push them off on an ice floe, but there aren't any of those left either.
 
2020-05-22 4:20:32 PM  
I was going to mention cell phones, but I see that's been covered. So I'll drop this here instead:

https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2​0​19/12/20/opinion/location-data-nationa​l-security.html
 
2020-05-22 4:53:20 PM  
Not worried, I'm sure my microchip will crash.
 
2020-05-22 5:05:00 PM  

grokca: Not worried, I'm sure my microchip will crash.


Gives the "blue screen of death" new meaning...
 
2020-05-22 5:37:28 PM  
does this include my wife's crazy dog-walking friend who is against 5G and chemtrails?
 
2020-05-22 5:38:38 PM  
Better tweet this from my phone that only has like a dozen real-time tracking vectors associated with it some of whom are foreign state players.
 
2020-05-22 5:39:04 PM  
I don't trust Bill Gates but I don't think he's going to microchip me.
 
2020-05-22 5:39:25 PM  
Can't vaccinate against sheer idiocy
 
2020-05-22 5:40:09 PM  
And they post these fears with their cell phones they have on them at all times.
 
2020-05-22 5:40:44 PM  
i.kym-cdn.comView Full Size
 
2020-05-22 5:41:01 PM  

Jack Sabbath: [Fark user image 700x954]

Not mine.  I might have stolen this from some Farker.


I'd like to point out that BG has actually given very little to his charity, considering how much money he has, and it is not half his money. He promised that.  Sofa change is what he has given. Means shiat to me, that money could be used right now if he actually cared.  He is just a rich man trying to buy his way out of Hell.
 
2020-05-22 5:41:09 PM  

JesseL: So there's a good chance a lot of them are going to die?

Not seeing the problem here.

They'll take others with them, including people not on their side.
 
2020-05-22 5:41:34 PM  

Jack Sabbath: Not mine.  I might have stolen this from some Farker.


It's 1000% true and I can't even fathom how many of these farkers manage to go about their day fully clothed like normies.
 
2020-05-22 5:42:22 PM  
I wish I lived in a world where 50% of Fox news viewer were interesting enough to be worth tracking for purposes other than avoiding them.
 
2020-05-22 5:43:11 PM  
I watch FOX every now and then to see what it is up to. Is there a more smug, douchy person on TV than Greg Gutfeld? He is like the Jimmy Fallon of FOX when it comes to laughing. And when he goes on his talking points, it is like watching him lick his own balls ( I have not ever seen that, nor do I want to ).
 
2020-05-22 5:43:50 PM  

Geotpf: [i.kym-cdn.com image 600x682]


Not yet it doesn't.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-05-22 5:44:15 PM  
Easy solution.. don't get vaccinated. Done and done.
 
2020-05-22 5:44:19 PM  
How do you coexist with people that live in a bad Stephen King novel? You can't have a functioning Republic with people like this.
 
2020-05-22 5:44:24 PM  

forteblast: Please. Bill Gates doesn't need implanted microchips to track you if you use Office, Skype, an Xbox, or any number of other things.


Minecraft, GitHub, Xbox Live...
 
2020-05-22 5:45:33 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size


You can't lie to these guys. They learned science.
 
2020-05-22 5:46:03 PM  
That's becuse they're the dumbest motherfarkers on the planet. Iredeemable trash. Mad dogs.
 
2020-05-22 5:46:13 PM  

johnphantom: Jack Sabbath: [Fark user image 700x954]

Not mine.  I might have stolen this from some Farker.

I'd like to point out that BG has actually given very little to his charity, considering how much money he has, and it is not half his money. He promised that.  Sofa change is what he has given. Means shiat to me, that money could be used right now if he actually cared.  He is just a rich man trying to buy his way out of Hell.


Forbes says he's given 27% of his net worth to charity. That's kind of far from "very little".
 
2020-05-22 5:46:42 PM  
Hey right wingers, you should be proud. This is the group you've chosen to be a part of. These are your people. This is who you are. A group of rational adults whose beliefs are firmly grounded in rock solid science and logic. Yup, a proud day.
 
2020-05-22 5:47:11 PM  
Look, these dolts are not unlike Farkers when it comes to being unable to comprehend a few things about the gov'mint and whether it does or does not "track" you.

1. If you live and participate in the world at all--have a job, buy commodities with anything but barter, own anything at all--then the government knows everything about you it wants to know, and can easily learn anything else it needs to. You leave dirty greasy fingerprints all over the grid every time you buy anything, go anywhere, use your ATM or credit card, phone, computer, bank account.

2. If you insist on announcing your presence via Facebook, Instagram, Twatter, then the rest of the world--Big Business, advertising, all those shadowy agencies that rule the planet--know everything about you that THEY want to know.

3. Unless you're a criminal, a psychopath with designs on an elected official, or a religious fanatic with a following and a stash of weapons, neither of those two groups give much of a shiat what you do or who you are.

Unless you're Ted Kaczynski and want to live in a shed in a forest in Montana with no electricity or running water, eating deer entrails and canned beans, then you're on the grid and will never be off. BUT unless you're Ted Kaczynski and start blowing up assorted college professors, nobody will care because you're too boring to notice.
 
2020-05-22 5:47:34 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-05-22 5:48:06 PM  

Jack Sabbath: [Fark user image 700x954]

Not mine.  I might have stolen this from some Farker.


Serves hime right for foisting BobOS and Clippy on us.
 
2020-05-22 5:48:06 PM  
It must be a terrible temptation to be a Fox News chyron writer. To know that at any moment you could put up something like "Christ Returns As A Labradoodle" and sure you'd get fired but you may also end up starting a small sect of people who are gullible as fark will probably believe it and then go online to say that it's true and the Fake News media are afraid to talk about it, which makes it even more true.

Just to know that for a moment you could send a small percentage of viewers into believing any dumb bullshiat you type up on there.
 
2020-05-22 5:48:58 PM  

johnphantom: Jack Sabbath: [Fark user image 700x954]

Not mine.  I might have stolen this from some Farker.

I'd like to point out that BG has actually given very little to his charity, considering how much money he has, and it is not half his money. He promised that.  Sofa change is what he has given. Means shiat to me, that money could be used right now if he actually cared.  He is just a rich man trying to buy his way out of Hell.


$36Billion is very little? I know, I know, you're going to compare that to his total net worth, but why would he be going to hell?
 
2020-05-22 5:49:35 PM  

Richard Roma: That's becuse they're the dumbest motherfarkers on the planet. Iredeemable trash. Mad dogs.


And this is what has become of American Exceptionalism....

You are unique because of your special brand of stupid and entitled in a significant subset of your population.
 
2020-05-22 5:50:22 PM  
Reality: anything small enough to be injected via needle doesn't have enough power to emit a signal strong enough to track more than a foot away.

Also reality: while Faux News is the top-rated cable news channel, it's total viewership - 2.57M in 2019 - is less than the number of votes Hillary won by in 2016. And I'm sure not every viewer responded to their poll. Even so, that would be 1.25M. Enough to do damage, but not a valid number.

Still - woah, that is scary.
 
2020-05-22 5:50:44 PM  

Lumbar Puncture: It must be a terrible temptation to be a Fox News chyron writer. To know that at any moment you could put up something like "Christ Returns As A Labradoodle" and sure you'd get fired but you may also end up starting a small sect of people who are gullible as fark will probably believe it and then go online to say that it's true and the Fake News media are afraid to talk about it, which makes it even more true.

Just to know that for a moment you could send a small percentage of viewers into believing any dumb bullshiat you type up on there.


You think that's a bad temptation? Imagine being Trump's teleprompter operator.
 
2020-05-22 5:50:49 PM  
So, there was this conspiracy thriller show in the UK a few years back, there was going to be a remake for HBO, David Lynch was attached, and then the whole thing just sort of disappeared.

I looked for it recently, and Amazon.co.uk had it in PAL format, in german, for over $100

The premise of the show is that there's an evil shadowy cabal that makes up a fake pandemic to get people to take a vaccine designed to sterilize a bunch of the population to fight climate change.

the notion that the HBO series for cancelled because it was true is more believable to me than this nonsense about Bill Gates and tracking microchips

1) Bill Gates has no need to track you, and has no demonstrated interest in doing so.
2) You can already be tracked, no microchip is necessary
3) If Bill Gates had developed technology to produce functional GPS tracking via hardware that is small enough to be injectable secretly via a vaccination, he wouldn't need to inject it into people individually - we'd breathe it in.

Which means if Covid is a hoax, it's a hoax designed to allow us to wear masks to protect ourselves from the microtrackers.
 
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