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(ABL13 Houston)   74-year old former TX Lt. Gov David Dewhurst says he's not interested in pursuing charges against his 40-year old girlfriend who is accused of assualting him and breaking several of his ribs; because....40-year girlfriend, so, totally worth it   (abc13.com) divider line
    More: Followup, Texas, Leslie Caron, David Dewhurst, United States, Former lieutenant governor David Dewhurst, Court records, Law enforcement sources, Positions of authority  
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1471 clicks; posted to Politics » on 21 May 2020 at 8:14 PM (2 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2020-05-21 4:17:58 PM  
I'd feel like such a creep if I had a girlfriend 34 years younger than me. I mean she'd be in third grade but that would apply to any age I was.
 
2020-05-21 4:24:54 PM  
This is Fark, I want to know:

1) how sharp her knees are
2) which amalgam of two celebrities she is
3) how hard you would crush it
 
2020-05-21 6:05:05 PM  
Many fine attributes.
 
2020-05-21 6:39:22 PM  

mrshowrules: This is Fark, I want to know:

1) how sharp her knees are
2) which amalgam of two celebrities she is
3) how hard you would crush it


From the bowels of the Interwebz, so shall thee recieve...

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-05-21 6:53:12 PM  

hubiestubert: mrshowrules: This is Fark, I want to know:

1) how sharp her knees are
2) which amalgam of two celebrities she is
3) how hard you would crush it

From the bowels of the Interwebz, so shall thee recieve...

[Fark user image 634x423]


Fark user imageView Full Size
Fark user imageView Full Size
Fark user imageView Full Size
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-05-21 7:02:03 PM  

centrifugal bumblepuppy: hubiestubert: mrshowrules: This is Fark, I want to know:

1) how sharp her knees are
2) which amalgam of two celebrities she is
3) how hard you would crush it

From the bowels of the Interwebz, so shall thee recieve...

[Fark user image 634x423]

[Fark user image 780x439][Fark user image 400x400][Fark user image 481x335][Fark user image 306x520]


Remind me how bad do broken ribs hurt again??
 
2020-05-21 7:09:38 PM  
Hmm. Speculation time...he presented a pre-nup that didn't float her boat? I guess she would be a second, more likely third or fourth wife, if they were to marry.

I spent years working with Texas trust and estate planning (and much of the rest of the country, as well.) Texas was at the top of the list for absolutely male-centric planning. Like, actively working to keep a wife powerless and fully dependent, even after the husband was dead & gone. Pre-nups there can be pretty archaic.

I don't know, just speculating. She shouldn't beat up old men, but there's at least a fair chance he was being a grade-A asshole. That seemed pretty standard in Texas amongst the "successful businessman" types.
 
2020-05-21 7:33:54 PM  

centrifugal bumblepuppy: hubiestubert: mrshowrules: This is Fark, I want to know:

1) how sharp her knees are
2) which amalgam of two celebrities she is
3) how hard you would crush it

From the bowels of the Interwebz, so shall thee receive...

[Fark user image 634x423]

[Fark user image 780x439][Fark user image 400x400][Fark user image 481x335][Fark user image 306x520]


OK...point of order here: who gave her those tiny ass chick lobsters? Are those even of legal limit size?

Second point of order: that DOES appear to be Standard Texas Cray and Cray in those eyes. Nothing overly special there. Just standard issue Livingston-levels of Crazy. That's a poke with a pool cue waiting to happen on a Saturday night. She WILL slap those words out of your mouth, the way her Momma taught her.
 
2020-05-21 8:10:11 PM  
According to court records, on May 13, Caron was reportedly upset with Dewhurst for not calling a business partner.

Then, four days later, records state she threw a pot at him and struck him in the elbow. She is accused of further assaulting him by scratching and biting him.


The rest of you can argue over her looks, but I think we can all at least agree that, based on the above, she really does seem like Dewhurst.
 
2020-05-21 8:18:51 PM  
Ugh blondes.

I like their doggies though.
 
2020-05-21 8:20:25 PM  
Golddigger?  Probably.

Stupid relationship?  Certainly.

About what you'd expect from a Texas politician?  Definitely.

Who fuhqing cares after that..?
 
2020-05-21 8:20:48 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size

I wouldn't have pegged her as the brawling type.
 
2020-05-21 8:21:54 PM  

centrifugal bumblepuppy: hubiestubert: mrshowrules: This is Fark, I want to know:

1) how sharp her knees are
2) which amalgam of two celebrities she is
3) how hard you would crush it

From the bowels of the Interwebz, so shall thee recieve...

[Fark user image 634x423]

[Fark user image 780x439][Fark user image 400x400][Fark user image 481x335][Fark user image 306x520]


That's like a 4 on the sharpness scale. Totally worth it.
 
2020-05-21 8:26:29 PM  

Shaggy_C: centrifugal bumblepuppy: hubiestubert: mrshowrules: This is Fark, I want to know:

1) how sharp her knees are
2) which amalgam of two celebrities she is
3) how hard you would crush it

From the bowels of the Interwebz, so shall thee recieve...

[Fark user image 634x423]

[Fark user image 780x439][Fark user image 400x400][Fark user image 481x335][Fark user image 306x520]

That's like a 4 on the sharpness scale. Totally worth it.


And he's 74, so he's probably tapping it as lightly as a blind man's cane.  Probably still has that new car smell and really excellent upholstery.
 
2020-05-21 8:26:56 PM  
And he thought losing a can't-lose Senate race to a Canadian would be the most embarrassing beating he'd ever take.
 
2020-05-21 8:28:13 PM  

Salted Metal Honey: centrifugal bumblepuppy: hubiestubert: mrshowrules: This is Fark, I want to know:

1) how sharp her knees are
2) which amalgam of two celebrities she is
3) how hard you would crush it

From the bowels of the Interwebz, so shall thee recieve...

[Fark user image 634x423]

[Fark user image 780x439][Fark user image 400x400][Fark user image 481x335][Fark user image 306x520]

Remind me how bad do broken ribs hurt again??


Like a sumbiatch, and they take forever to heal.  Still definitely would.
/Loves me some crazy.
//Loves. It.
///It helps being a light sleeper - safety first.
 
2020-05-21 8:30:21 PM  
Assault is assault.
 
2020-05-21 8:33:39 PM  

LadySusan: Assault is assault.


And Apepper is Apepper.
 
2020-05-21 8:34:22 PM  
Yes totally crazy, but would def plow.
 
2020-05-21 8:35:50 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-05-21 8:37:43 PM  

ditka80: [Fark user image image 340x192]


She's a Texas Republican, so yeah.
 
2020-05-21 8:38:11 PM  

centrifugal bumblepuppy: hubiestubert: mrshowrules: This is Fark, I want to know:

1) how sharp her knees are
2) which amalgam of two celebrities she is
3) how hard you would crush it

From the bowels of the Interwebz, so shall thee recieve...

[Fark user image 634x423]

[Fark user image image 780x439][Fark user image image 400x400][Fark user image image 481x335][Fark user image image 306x520]


Eh, I've had crazier.
 
2020-05-21 8:38:16 PM  
He knew what he was in for. Buy the ticket take.
 
2020-05-21 8:38:52 PM  
The rib smashing.

Damn formatting.
 
2020-05-21 8:43:44 PM  
It's likely she still has his balls in a jar and the only way he can get them back is to not press charges.

But in the town it was well known that when he returned home at night.....
 
2020-05-21 8:46:57 PM  

hubiestubert: mrshowrules: This is Fark, I want to know:

1) how sharp her knees are
2) which amalgam of two celebrities she is
3) how hard you would crush it

From the bowels of the Interwebz, so shall thee recieve...

[Fark user image 634x423]



Why does the song 'Peg' keep coming to mind when I see this picture?
 
2020-05-21 8:47:43 PM  
David Dewhurst is a douchebag.
 
2020-05-21 8:53:11 PM  
After viewing the pics, I'll allow it.
 
2020-05-21 8:56:33 PM  
He's not pressing charges because he's embarrassed.
Not because he got his ass kicked by the Kristen Chenowith of Y'all Qaeda, but because the charge she was booked on was "Assault on the Elderly."

He hates being outed as Elderly. FFS, he's like those guys that insist on still calling themselves Middle-Aged well into their 60s.
 
2020-05-21 9:00:02 PM  
First RAND PAUL! and now poor Dewhurst!

It would be a real shame if "beating the fark out of Republicans" becomes a thing.
 
2020-05-21 9:03:57 PM  

stoli n coke: Eh, I've had crazier.


I married crazier.
 
2020-05-21 9:10:34 PM  
oh, well i was expecting something closer to this.
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-05-21 9:29:40 PM  
Broken ribs?
media.makeameme.orgView Full Size
 
2020-05-21 9:29:47 PM  

Shaggy_C: centrifugal bumblepuppy: hubiestubert: mrshowrules: This is Fark, I want to know:

1) how sharp her knees are
2) which amalgam of two celebrities she is
3) how hard you would crush it

From the bowels of the Interwebz, so shall thee recieve...

[Fark user image 634x423]

[Fark user image 780x439][Fark user image 400x400][Fark user image 481x335][Fark user image 306x520]

That's like a 4 on the sharpness scale. Totally worth it.


The are definitely acute pair of knees.
 
2020-05-21 9:30:39 PM  
In all seriousness, if guilty that crazy biatch needs to go to jail.
 
2020-05-21 9:35:52 PM  
When I'm 75, sure!
When I'm 55, I got way better.
I do like the fact she kicked his ass though... I wonder what house/ca she didn't get...


Salted Metal Honey: Remind me how bad do broken ribs hurt again??


My experience is... a lot. It isn't so bad if you don't get up, lay down, roll over, cough, sneeze or expect to do anything normal. Other than that and pain killers, it's not a big deal.
You have better things to do...
 
2020-05-21 9:39:28 PM  

Percise1: When I'm 75, sure!
When I'm 55, I got way better.
I do like the fact she kicked his ass though... I wonder what house/ca she didn't get...


Salted Metal Honey: Remind me how bad do broken ribs hurt again??

My experience is... a lot. It isn't so bad if you don't get up, lay down, roll over, cough, sneeze or expect to do anything normal. Other than that and pain killers, it's not a big deal.
You have better things to do...


... laugh
 
2020-05-21 9:39:44 PM  

Salted Metal Honey: centrifugal bumblepuppy: hubiestubert: mrshowrules: This is Fark, I want to know:

1) how sharp her knees are
2) which amalgam of two celebrities she is
3) how hard you would crush it

From the bowels of the Interwebz, so shall thee recieve...

[Fark user image 634x423]

[Fark user image 780x439][Fark user image 400x400][Fark user image 481x335][Fark user image 306x520]

Remind me how bad do broken ribs hurt again??


Pain don't hurt.
 
2020-05-21 9:45:37 PM  

Salted Metal Honey: centrifugal bumblepuppy: hubiestubert: mrshowrules: This is Fark, I want to know:

1) how sharp her knees are
2) which amalgam of two celebrities she is
3) how hard you would crush it

From the bowels of the Interwebz, so shall thee recieve...

[Fark user image 634x423]

[Fark user image 780x439][Fark user image 400x400][Fark user image 481x335][Fark user image 306x520]

Remind me how bad do broken ribs hurt again??


Pretty damn bad.
Last time I broke one was about 9 or 10 years ago. I had taken my ex out to see Paranormal Activity. We came back to my place and were asleep, when she got spooked by the cracking of the hardwood floor and the fridge compresser switching on. Elbowed me right in the chest. By the next afternoon, any kind of movement was pretty damn painful and about half the left side of my chest was purple.
 
2020-05-21 9:47:39 PM  

Mugato: I'd feel like such a creep if I had a girlfriend 34 years younger than me. I mean she'd be in third grade


Mine would be 21. Jackpot.
 
2020-05-21 9:57:05 PM  

hubiestubert: centrifugal bumblepuppy: hubiestubert: mrshowrules: This is Fark, I want to know:

1) how sharp her knees are
2) which amalgam of two celebrities she is
3) how hard you would crush it

From the bowels of the Interwebz, so shall thee receive...

[Fark user image 634x423]

[Fark user image 780x439][Fark user image 400x400][Fark user image 481x335][Fark user image 306x520]

OK...point of order here: who gave her those tiny ass chick lobsters? Are those even of legal limit size?

Second point of order: that DOES appear to be Standard Texas Cray and Cray in those eyes. Nothing overly special there. Just standard issue Livingston-levels of Crazy. That's a poke with a pool cue waiting to happen on a Saturday night. She WILL slap those words out of your mouth, the way her Momma taught her.


That post just threw the lyrics right up into my head:

Sonny's playing eightball at the joint where Sherry works
When some drunken out-of-towner puts his hand up Sherry's skirt
Sonny took his pool cue laid the drunk out on the floor
Stuffed a dollar in her tip jar and he headed out of the door
She's running right behind him, reachin for his hand
The road goes on forever and the party never ends.
 
2020-05-21 10:21:19 PM  

Salted Metal Honey: centrifugal bumblepuppy: hubiestubert: mrshowrules: This is Fark, I want to know:

1) how sharp her knees are
2) which amalgam of two celebrities she is
3) how hard you would crush it

From the bowels of the Interwebz, so shall thee recieve...

[Fark user image 634x423]

[Fark user image 780x439][Fark user image 400x400][Fark user image 481x335][Fark user image 306x520]

Remind me how bad do broken ribs hurt again??


It hurts real bad when she rides you like a cowgirl. With harder trusts, she can puncture your lung. But, don't care, had sex.
 
2020-05-21 10:34:53 PM  
Wait, somebody beat the shiat out of David Dewhurst?

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-05-22 12:24:40 AM  

hubiestubert: mrshowrules: This is Fark, I want to know:

1) how sharp her knees are
2) which amalgam of two celebrities she is
3) how hard you would crush it

From the bowels of the Interwebz, so shall thee recieve...

[Fark user image image 634x423]


Which one is the girlfriend?
 
2020-05-22 12:45:23 AM  
Elder abuse is a big problem here, especially with the aging population. He's not unusual from that perspective.

Perpetrators are not normally romantic partners. He is very unusual in that respect.

Find yourself an age-appropriate partner. It's not that hard, when you're 74 and a guy. An that age group, there are like 10:1 single women to men.

/sex reference is intentional
//I'm neither 40 nor 74.
///I'm pretty much right in the middle b/w the two.
 
2020-05-22 1:04:52 AM  

Salted Metal Honey: centrifugal bumblepuppy: hubiestubert: mrshowrules: This is Fark, I want to know:

1) how sharp her knees are
2) which amalgam of two celebrities she is
3) how hard you would crush it

From the bowels of the Interwebz, so shall thee recieve...

[Fark user image 634x423]

[Fark user image 780x439][Fark user image 400x400][Fark user image 481x335][Fark user image 306x520]

Remind me how bad do broken ribs hurt again??


A LOT. Twice just to make sure.
 
2020-05-22 1:23:43 AM  

robbrie: Find yourself an age-appropriate partner


not every adult thinks High School is all that
 
2020-05-22 1:27:01 AM  

robbrie: ///I'm pretty much right in the middle b/w the two.


So your real name is Pierre?
 
2020-05-22 2:47:12 AM  

mrshowrules: In all seriousness, if guilty that crazy biatch needs to go to jail.


She does.

And for a man that age, those are some serious injuries to recover from. Bodies of the elderly aren't that great at the healing process. Sometimes, not healing at all from something as simple as a broken bone.
 
2020-05-22 3:03:34 AM  

centrifugal bumblepuppy: hubiestubert: mrshowrules: This is Fark, I want to know:

1) how sharp her knees are
2) which amalgam of two celebrities she is
3) how hard you would crush it

From the bowels of the Interwebz, so shall thee recieve...

[Fark user image 634x423]

[Fark user image image 780x439][Fark user image image 400x400][Fark user image image 481x335][Fark user image image 306x520]


2) Sarah Michelle Gellar and Newt Gingrich's wife.
 
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