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(Twitter)   It is not every day that a person who happens to be the President of the United States retweets someone who happens to often call him a farkopotamus. That is not a common occurrence   (twitter.com) divider line
    More: Amusing, shot  
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4751 clicks; posted to Politics » on 21 May 2020 at 1:17 AM (2 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



42 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2020-05-20 5:20:25 PM  
Original Tweet:

 
2020-05-20 10:15:32 PM  
That was a hell of a ride.

Thanks.
 
2020-05-20 11:20:18 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size


LULZ
 
2020-05-21 12:02:56 AM  
That was hilarious. Great way to end the day.
 
2020-05-21 1:18:34 AM  
Based on the headline I thought he retweeted Ivanka.
 
2020-05-21 1:23:27 AM  

leeksfromchichis: Based on the headline I thought he retweeted Ivanka.


No, he's still nice to her, because he thinks that will get her in the sack.
 
2020-05-21 1:27:00 AM  
Does no one know how to turn off notifications?

Your phone doesn't have to suffer shiat. If you go viral, turn off all notifications and ignore social media for a few days. It washes over you like a wave. Come back after it passes and shiatcan all replies, posts, notifications and inbox messages that have been piling up. Then move on with your life.

A million yahoos blasting you from all corners of the globe is not worth one minute of your time. Social media is very easily ignorable.
 
2020-05-21 1:28:59 AM  

mithras_angel: leeksfromchichis: Based on the headline I thought he retweeted Ivanka.

No, he's still nice to her, because he thinks that will get her in the sack.


And she's nice to him because she thinks there's some kind of inheritance (which would be inheriting failing businesses, mountains of never ending debt and finding out he's been flat farking broke). You're gonna hear a lot of dirty laundry and skeletons pouring out of the closet when his kids find out they kissed his ass in return for utter humiliation and ruin.
 
2020-05-21 1:31:04 AM  
$43

lol

Man, I might throw in some beer money for him.
 
2020-05-21 1:32:29 AM  

kling_klang_bed: mithras_angel: leeksfromchichis: Based on the headline I thought he retweeted Ivanka.

No, he's still nice to her, because he thinks that will get her in the sack.

And she's nice to him because she thinks there's some kind of inheritance (which would be inheriting failing businesses, mountains of never ending debt and finding out he's been flat farking broke). You're gonna hear a lot of dirty laundry and skeletons pouring out of the closet when his kids find out they kissed his ass in return for utter humiliation and ruin.



See, I'm not entirely unconvinced that when Trump finally dies, that Ivanka won't immediately move to block both Don Jr and Eric from inheriting anything.

On the grounds that neither of them is Donny's biological son.  And then we'll see it dragged out in DNA tests.  With maybe them trying the same thing on her.  (I have no idea if either / any side will try to invalidate Tiffany or Barron.)
 
2020-05-21 1:35:32 AM  

mithras_angel: kling_klang_bed: mithras_angel: leeksfromchichis: Based on the headline I thought he retweeted Ivanka.

No, he's still nice to her, because he thinks that will get her in the sack.

And she's nice to him because she thinks there's some kind of inheritance (which would be inheriting failing businesses, mountains of never ending debt and finding out he's been flat farking broke). You're gonna hear a lot of dirty laundry and skeletons pouring out of the closet when his kids find out they kissed his ass in return for utter humiliation and ruin.


See, I'm not entirely unconvinced that when Trump finally dies, that Ivanka won't immediately move to block both Don Jr and Eric from inheriting anything.

On the grounds that neither of them is Donny's biological son.  And then we'll see it dragged out in DNA tests.  With maybe them trying the same thing on her.  (I have no idea if either / any side will try to invalidate Tiffany or Barron.)


The DNA tests will prove once and for all that Half Scoop's dad is really Vince McMahon, and Eric's dad is actually Martin Shkreli.
 
2020-05-21 1:38:48 AM  
The advice on how to treat his phone and repair their relationship was great. Good laughs all the way around.

Keep going, Horsie Guy.
 
2020-05-21 1:42:54 AM  

Ishkur: Does no one know how to turn off notifications?

Your phone doesn't have to suffer shiat. If you go viral, turn off all notifications and ignore social media for a few days. It washes over you like a wave. Come back after it passes and shiatcan all replies, posts, notifications and inbox messages that have been piling up. Then move on with your life.

A million yahoos blasting you from all corners of the globe is not worth one minute of your time. Social media is very easily ignorable.


I regained the health of my mind when I discovered I could just delete my twitter account.

Y'all can't pay me to be on twitter again. I'd decline any job offer attached to that.
 
2020-05-21 1:51:23 AM  

kling_klang_bed: mithras_angel: leeksfromchichis: Based on the headline I thought he retweeted Ivanka.

No, he's still nice to her, because he thinks that will get her in the sack.

And she's nice to him because she thinks there's some kind of inheritance (which would be inheriting failing businesses, mountains of never ending debt and finding out he's been flat farking broke). You're gonna hear a lot of dirty laundry and skeletons pouring out of the closet when his kids find out they kissed his ass in return for utter humiliation and ruin.


Unfortunately, after the previous three years, the coffers are probably full.
 
2020-05-21 1:51:52 AM  

casual disregard: Ishkur: Does no one know how to turn off notifications?

Your phone doesn't have to suffer shiat. If you go viral, turn off all notifications and ignore social media for a few days. It washes over you like a wave. Come back after it passes and shiatcan all replies, posts, notifications and inbox messages that have been piling up. Then move on with your life.

A million yahoos blasting you from all corners of the globe is not worth one minute of your time. Social media is very easily ignorable.

I regained the health of my mind when I discovered I could just delete my twitter account.

Y'all can't pay me to be on twitter again. I'd decline any job offer attached to that.


What if it was an administrative job with Twitter that allowed you to ban Trump? Or better yet, put his tweets into a queue before being posted, and make him wait weeks for one to even get posted?
 
2020-05-21 2:17:30 AM  

mithras_angel: kling_klang_bed: mithras_angel: leeksfromchichis: Based on the headline I thought he retweeted Ivanka.

No, he's still nice to her, because he thinks that will get her in the sack.

And she's nice to him because she thinks there's some kind of inheritance (which would be inheriting failing businesses, mountains of never ending debt and finding out he's been flat farking broke). You're gonna hear a lot of dirty laundry and skeletons pouring out of the closet when his kids find out they kissed his ass in return for utter humiliation and ruin.


See, I'm not entirely unconvinced that when Trump finally dies, that Ivanka won't immediately move to block both Don Jr and Eric from inheriting anything.

On the grounds that neither of them is Donny's biological son.  And then we'll see it dragged out in DNA tests.  With maybe them trying the same thing on her.  (I have no idea if either / any side will try to invalidate Tiffany or Barron.)


They already tried to write Tiffany out of the will. I think it came up in one of the Howard Stern interviews where Ivanka and Half Scoop were also present.
 
2020-05-21 2:18:29 AM  
In the future everyone will be famous for 15 Trump retweets.
 
2020-05-21 2:25:40 AM  

kling_klang_bed: casual disregard: Ishkur: Does no one know how to turn off notifications?

Your phone doesn't have to suffer shiat. If you go viral, turn off all notifications and ignore social media for a few days. It washes over you like a wave. Come back after it passes and shiatcan all replies, posts, notifications and inbox messages that have been piling up. Then move on with your life.

A million yahoos blasting you from all corners of the globe is not worth one minute of your time. Social media is very easily ignorable.

I regained the health of my mind when I discovered I could just delete my twitter account.

Y'all can't pay me to be on twitter again. I'd decline any job offer attached to that.

What if it was an administrative job with Twitter that allowed you to ban Trump? Or better yet, put his tweets into a queue before being posted, and make him wait weeks for one to even get posted?



Please, please, please be Jack Dorsey's alt.
 
2020-05-21 2:25:59 AM  

casual disregard: Ishkur: Does no one know how to turn off notifications?

Your phone doesn't have to suffer shiat. If you go viral, turn off all notifications and ignore social media for a few days. It washes over you like a wave. Come back after it passes and shiatcan all replies, posts, notifications and inbox messages that have been piling up. Then move on with your life.

A million yahoos blasting you from all corners of the globe is not worth one minute of your time. Social media is very easily ignorable.

I regained the health of my mind when I discovered I could just delete my twitter account.

Y'all can't pay me to be on twitter again. I'd decline any job offer attached to that.


the only reason i have a twitter account is to get in contact with a human customer support person, which is apparently impossible to do through other channels these days
 
2020-05-21 2:31:06 AM  
I resent the fact that you made me click on twitter.
 
2020-05-21 2:33:52 AM  

mithras_angel: kling_klang_bed: mithras_angel: leeksfromchichis: Based on the headline I thought he retweeted Ivanka.

No, he's still nice to her, because he thinks that will get her in the sack.

And she's nice to him because she thinks there's some kind of inheritance (which would be inheriting failing businesses, mountains of never ending debt and finding out he's been flat farking broke). You're gonna hear a lot of dirty laundry and skeletons pouring out of the closet when his kids find out they kissed his ass in return for utter humiliation and ruin.


See, I'm not entirely unconvinced that when Trump finally dies, that Ivanka won't immediately move to block both Don Jr and Eric from inheriting anything.

On the grounds that neither of them is Donny's biological son.  And then we'll see it dragged out in DNA tests.  With maybe them trying the same thing on her.  (I have no idea if either / any side will try to invalidate Tiffany or Barron.)


I'M ERIC! Is without a doubt Two Scoops' kid. FFS, he's got so many excess chromosomes, he legally qualifies as 3 people.
 
2020-05-21 3:09:47 AM  

stoli n coke: mithras_angel: kling_klang_bed: mithras_angel: leeksfromchichis: Based on the headline I thought he retweeted Ivanka.

No, he's still nice to her, because he thinks that will get her in the sack.

And she's nice to him because she thinks there's some kind of inheritance (which would be inheriting failing businesses, mountains of never ending debt and finding out he's been flat farking broke). You're gonna hear a lot of dirty laundry and skeletons pouring out of the closet when his kids find out they kissed his ass in return for utter humiliation and ruin.


See, I'm not entirely unconvinced that when Trump finally dies, that Ivanka won't immediately move to block both Don Jr and Eric from inheriting anything.

On the grounds that neither of them is Donny's biological son.  And then we'll see it dragged out in DNA tests.  With maybe them trying the same thing on her.  (I have no idea if either / any side will try to invalidate Tiffany or Barron.)

I'M ERIC! Is without a doubt Two Scoops' kid. FFS, he's got so many excess chromosomes, he legally qualifies as 3 people.


The aftermath of Corky from Life Goes On getting Klaus Kinsky pregnant.
 
2020-05-21 3:41:49 AM  

i ignore u: I resent the fact that you made me click on twitter.


I think that is another thing I hate Trump for, making me look at Twitter.
 
2020-05-21 3:54:10 AM  

northgrave: kling_klang_bed: mithras_angel: leeksfromchichis: Based on the headline I thought he retweeted Ivanka.

No, he's still nice to her, because he thinks that will get her in the sack.

And she's nice to him because she thinks there's some kind of inheritance (which would be inheriting failing businesses, mountains of never ending debt and finding out he's been flat farking broke). You're gonna hear a lot of dirty laundry and skeletons pouring out of the closet when his kids find out they kissed his ass in return for utter humiliation and ruin.

Unfortunately, after the previous three years, the coffers are probably full.


I'll take the position that we'd be surprised.

Remember: Just based on what we KNOW, this dumb shiat was $400M in hock to Russia through a single arbiter (Deutchebank). His traitor of a son-in-law was a billion dollars upside down on a mortgage before adding "espionage for personal profit" to the list of capital crimes.

And his past attempts at running his own businesses - Trump Vodka, Trump Steaks, etc - all evince incredibly small thinking. Actual billionaires don't sell steaks in stores, they own the cattle farms and the entire national chain of restaurants. Everything we've seen of his thieving from the national treasury, on the scale of a traitor who's at least half a billion in debt to the person who can prove he's a traitor and ruin him, is bloody peanuts relative to what anyone would expect.

Remember: Donald is a pathetic failure at everything he's ever done or tried to do. Why would grifting be any different?
 
2020-05-21 4:07:44 AM  
farkopotamus?
farkupotamus would be better. 
farkupotanus may be a step too far?
 
2020-05-21 4:17:03 AM  

Wyalt Derp: farkopotamus?
farkupotamus would be better. 
farkupotanus may be a step too far?


farkivankapus. Now that's too far.
 
2020-05-21 6:11:51 AM  
Yeah, it's twitter fame: famous for exactly 15 seconds.
 
2020-05-21 6:33:13 AM  

erik-k: northgrave: kling_klang_bed: mithras_angel: leeksfromchichis: Based on the headline I thought he retweeted Ivanka.

No, he's still nice to her, because he thinks that will get her in the sack.

And she's nice to him because she thinks there's some kind of inheritance (which would be inheriting failing businesses, mountains of never ending debt and finding out he's been flat farking broke). You're gonna hear a lot of dirty laundry and skeletons pouring out of the closet when his kids find out they kissed his ass in return for utter humiliation and ruin.

Unfortunately, after the previous three years, the coffers are probably full.

I'll take the position that we'd be surprised.

Remember: Just based on what we KNOW, this dumb shiat was $400M in hock to Russia through a single arbiter (Deutchebank). His traitor of a son-in-law was a billion dollars upside down on a mortgage before adding "espionage for personal profit" to the list of capital crimes.

And his past attempts at running his own businesses - Trump Vodka, Trump Steaks, etc - all evince incredibly small thinking. Actual billionaires don't sell steaks in stores, they own the cattle farms and the entire national chain of restaurants. Everything we've seen of his thieving from the national treasury, on the scale of a traitor who's at least half a billion in debt to the person who can prove he's a traitor and ruin him, is bloody peanuts relative to what anyone would expect.

Remember: Donald is a pathetic failure at everything he's ever done or tried to do. Why would grifting be any different?


Trump didn't even bother to sell his steaks in stores. He sold them through the mail. A tea totaller whose brother drank himself to death selling bum grade vodka, embroiled in a debacle with multivitamins, drove three casinos into bankruptcy because he couldn't slap his name on the front, etc.

10 of Donald Trump's Business That Completely Failed
Youtube 9yJ7XfB1ydA


Not to mention Art Of The Comeback, his book where he bragged about being billions in debt, after Art Of The Deal, where he proclaimed himself a master of deal making.
 
2020-05-21 6:50:28 AM  

erik-k: northgrave: kling_klang_bed: mithras_angel: leeksfromchichis: Based on the headline I thought he retweeted Ivanka.

No, he's still nice to her, because he thinks that will get her in the sack.

And she's nice to him because she thinks there's some kind of inheritance (which would be inheriting failing businesses, mountains of never ending debt and finding out he's been flat farking broke). You're gonna hear a lot of dirty laundry and skeletons pouring out of the closet when his kids find out they kissed his ass in return for utter humiliation and ruin.

Unfortunately, after the previous three years, the coffers are probably full.

I'll take the position that we'd be surprised.

Remember: Just based on what we KNOW, this dumb shiat was $400M in hock to Russia through a single arbiter (Deutchebank). His traitor of a son-in-law was a billion dollars upside down on a mortgage before adding "espionage for personal profit" to the list of capital crimes.

And his past attempts at running his own businesses - Trump Vodka, Trump Steaks, etc - all evince incredibly small thinking. Actual billionaires don't sell steaks in stores, they own the cattle farms and the entire national chain of restaurants. Everything we've seen of his thieving from the national treasury, on the scale of a traitor who's at least half a billion in debt to the person who can prove he's a traitor and ruin him, is bloody peanuts relative to what anyone would expect.

Remember: Donald is a pathetic failure at everything he's ever done or tried to do. Why would grifting be any different?


And don't forget that Destchebank found out he lied about his wealth. He estimated his overall worth to be $5 billion, yet found out he was worth only $800 million. For whatever reason, they funneled the money to him for Trump Tower Chicago. Credit given, and I lived 5 minutes from it, it's a beautiful and very well built building. The catch?

(1). People with that kind of money tend to go to the burbs (like Highland Park) rather than live in the city, much less downtown. You can easily get the same kind of property in Hyde Park on the lakefront, or in Edgewater or Lakeview, at a fraction of the price. People with that kind of money could easily get lakefront property in Roger's Park/Evanston and have plenty of scratch left over with the same view of the lake.
(2). It's about half a mile from any kind of parking, which is farking expensive downtown. The nearest place you can get any.
(3). It's still 3/4 empty. No self-respecting Chicagoan wants to live downtown. It's like how real New Yorkers view Times Square.
 
2020-05-21 6:54:07 AM  
What was the original tweet?
 
2020-05-21 6:55:12 AM  

kling_klang_bed: erik-k: northgrave: kling_klang_bed: mithras_angel: leeksfromchichis: Based on the headline I thought he retweeted Ivanka.

No, he's still nice to her, because he thinks that will get her in the sack.

And she's nice to him because she thinks there's some kind of inheritance (which would be inheriting failing businesses, mountains of never ending debt and finding out he's been flat farking broke). You're gonna hear a lot of dirty laundry and skeletons pouring out of the closet when his kids find out they kissed his ass in return for utter humiliation and ruin.

Unfortunately, after the previous three years, the coffers are probably full.

I'll take the position that we'd be surprised.

Remember: Just based on what we KNOW, this dumb shiat was $400M in hock to Russia through a single arbiter (Deutchebank). His traitor of a son-in-law was a billion dollars upside down on a mortgage before adding "espionage for personal profit" to the list of capital crimes.

And his past attempts at running his own businesses - Trump Vodka, Trump Steaks, etc - all evince incredibly small thinking. Actual billionaires don't sell steaks in stores, they own the cattle farms and the entire national chain of restaurants. Everything we've seen of his thieving from the national treasury, on the scale of a traitor who's at least half a billion in debt to the person who can prove he's a traitor and ruin him, is bloody peanuts relative to what anyone would expect.

Remember: Donald is a pathetic failure at everything he's ever done or tried to do. Why would grifting be any different?

Trump didn't even bother to sell his steaks in stores. He sold them through the mail. A tea totaller whose brother drank himself to death selling bum grade vodka, embroiled in a debacle with multivitamins, drove three casinos into bankruptcy because he couldn't slap his name on the front, etc.

[Youtube-video https://www.youtube.com/embed/9yJ7XfB1​ydA]

Not to mention Art Of The Comeback, his book where he bragged ...


And the only reason he wasn't bankrupted from that debt was Wilbur Ross, who sat his creditors down and convinced them that their debt was worth more if they pretended that the Trump name had value. Ross was the master negotiator. Trump didn't do shiat.
 
2020-05-21 6:57:42 AM  

Invincible: What was the original tweet?


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-05-21 7:09:29 AM  

kling_klang_bed: Invincible: What was the original tweet?

[Fark user image image 300x375]


Classic!
 
2020-05-21 8:04:02 AM  

northgrave: kling_klang_bed: mithras_angel: leeksfromchichis: Based on the headline I thought he retweeted Ivanka.

No, he's still nice to her, because he thinks that will get her in the sack.

And she's nice to him because she thinks there's some kind of inheritance (which would be inheriting failing businesses, mountains of never ending debt and finding out he's been flat farking broke). You're gonna hear a lot of dirty laundry and skeletons pouring out of the closet when his kids find out they kissed his ass in return for utter humiliation and ruin.

Unfortunately, after the previous three years, the coffers are probably full.


The last three years are barely covering the vig on what he owes the Russian mob
 
2020-05-21 8:27:21 AM  

kling_klang_bed: Invincible: What was the original tweet?

[Fark user image image 300x375]


This will never not be funny.
 
2020-05-21 8:55:17 AM  
In total, I got 344,000 notifications yesterday. And all of that makes your phone moody and distant. You ask "Are you okay?" And your phone gives you a chilly "I'm fine."

This is comedy gold.
 
2020-05-21 9:09:34 AM  
During a national crisis, the President of the United States is sitting on his phone doing random searches on Twitter and blindly posting what he sees.

That is not funny.
 
2020-05-21 9:43:10 AM  

casual disregard: Ishkur: Does no one know how to turn off notifications?

Your phone doesn't have to suffer shiat. If you go viral, turn off all notifications and ignore social media for a few days. It washes over you like a wave. Come back after it passes and shiatcan all replies, posts, notifications and inbox messages that have been piling up. Then move on with your life.

A million yahoos blasting you from all corners of the globe is not worth one minute of your time. Social media is very easily ignorable.

I regained the health of my mind when I discovered I could just delete my twitter account.

Y'all can't pay me to be on twitter again. I'd decline any job offer attached to that.


That sounds very relieving. I wish I had a Twitter account to delete. ( ._.)
 
2020-05-21 10:02:55 AM  
FTThread: Some very kind souls found the Ko-Fi link in my bio and put a few beans in my can.
Boom! Just like that I was sitting on $43 dollars.
Being a shrewd businessman, I invested the newfound capital in commodities.
A tank of gas and a four-pack of Guinness.
I like to keep my assets liquid.


...what's this twit's Fark handle?
 
2020-05-21 10:06:01 AM  

Invincible: What was the original tweet?


It was a joke about Fox News whipsawing back and forth on whether taking the Shiatgibbon's favorite drug will kill you or not.
 
2020-05-21 10:27:35 AM  

dsmith42: Remember: Donald is a pathetic failure at everything he's ever done or tried to do. Why would grifting be any different?


That is the funniest comment I have read this week.

Also, you (and others) are right; I may have overestimated his ability in this regard.
 
2020-05-21 11:47:46 AM  

geoduck42: Invincible: What was the original tweet?

It was a joke about Fox News whipsawing back and forth on whether taking the Shiatgibbon's favorite drug will kill you or not.


It was more like a joke about Laura Ingram trying to kill Trump.
 
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