Skip to content
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(ABC News)   Quest for 'super duper' missiles pits US against key rivals, as the race for the Wowee Bomb or Really Kickass Torpedo heats up bigly   (abcnews.go.com) divider line
    More: Murica, Nuclear weapon, Ballistic missile, Intercontinental ballistic missile, Missile, Scramjet, hypersonic weapons, President Donald Trump, Mach number  
•       •       •

1812 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 May 2020 at 2:57 PM (6 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

 
2020-05-20 2:59:43 PM  
16 votes:
I feel good knowing theres a functionally illiterate draft dodger in charge.
 
2020-05-20 3:16:52 PM  
13 votes:
I've heard good things about the MAGA-missile, except it always veers wildly to the right and can only attack dark targets.
 
2020-05-20 3:14:03 PM  
9 votes:
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-05-20 3:30:09 PM  
6 votes:
He never CALLED them "super-duper missiles."  That's false reporting and fake news.

He only said THAT he calls them that.  But he didn't call them that, so it's wrong to say that he did.

Checks mix, libturds.
 
2020-05-20 3:42:49 PM  
5 votes:
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-05-20 4:01:51 PM  
4 votes:

orbister: dothemath: I feel good knowing theres a functionally illiterate draft dodger in charge.

I would not like to have someone with his or her finger on the button who had ever volunteered to fight. It's a job for a coward.


In reality there is no "button". The President is always accompanied by an aide carrying a small valise containing a radio that can be used to contact SAC/NORAD.
The "finger" is also a myth. Presidents will typically use their penis to signal the initiation of WW3.
 
2020-05-20 3:09:15 PM  
4 votes:
ICBKM: Intercontinental bees-knees missile
 
2020-05-20 3:51:10 PM  
3 votes:
 
oyster.ignimgs.comView Full Size

With all the cash the US dumps into war and war related materials, shouldn't things look something like this?
 
2020-05-20 3:37:08 PM  
3 votes:
We call them 'super-fast,' where they're four, five, six and even seven times faster than an ordinary missile. We need that because, again, Russia has some."
Fark user imageView Full Size

Ted : That's right. That's - that's good. That's good. Unless, of course, somebody comes up with one eight times faster. Then you're in trouble, huh?

[Trump convulses]

Trump : No! No, no, not eight ! I said seven. Nobody's comin' up with eight . Who makes a missile eight times faster? You won't even get your heart goin, not even a mouse on a wheel.

Ted : That - good point.

Trump : Seven's the key number here. Think about it. 7-Elevens. seven dwarves. Seven , man, that's the number. Seven chipmunks twirlin' on a branch, eatin' lots of sunflowers on my uncle's ranch. You know that old children's tale from the sea. It's like you're dreamin' about Gorgonzola cheese when it's clearly Brie time, baby. Step into my office.

Ted : Why?

Trump : 'Cause you're farkin' fired!
 
2020-05-20 3:29:06 PM  
3 votes:
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-05-20 3:02:28 PM  
3 votes:
Can't they just pretend to make it and then tell him it runs on the Invisibility Engine like the F-35?
 
2020-05-20 3:57:06 PM  
2 votes:

Unicron74: Gyrfalcon: Conservative Evangelical Millennial Cyclist: Call me when we have a radical rail gun

We have a radical railgun.

You mean when we have the Hammer of Dawn.

You mean the BFG-9000 for the infantry.


I've wanted a chainsaw bayonet for over a decade.
 
2020-05-20 3:22:08 PM  
2 votes:
Bees Knees Kablooey

Dope-ass Bang Log

Metal Dick of Combustible Devastation

Nuke-tipped Fark You 5000
 
2020-05-20 3:17:46 PM  
2 votes:

BigNumber12: Trump occasionally mentions his interest in hypersonic weapons, sometimes without using the term. In February he told governors visiting the White House: "We have the super-fast missiles - tremendous number of the super-fast. We call them 'super-fast,' where they're four, five, six and even seven times faster than an ordinary missile. We need that because, again, Russia has some."

And last Friday, Trump told reporters, "We have no choice, we have to do it, with the adversaries we have out there," mentioning China and Russia. He added, "I call it the super-duper missile." He said he "heard" it travels 17 times faster than any other U.S. missile. "It just got the go-ahead," he added, although the Pentagon would not comment on that.


That whole section of the article could have been replaced by a single line, and we all would have been better off.

"President Trump is excited about hypersonic missiles and wants some, but doesn't understand them."


Was his response a mad lib?
 
2020-05-20 3:08:19 PM  
2 votes:

joker420: Welp, I guess we ended WWll a few years to early.


Fark user imageView Full Size

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-05-20 7:49:08 PM  
1 vote:
Beavis and Butt-head Do Star Trek
Youtube 20QBhZZRJDU


We need fruiton torpedos.
 
2020-05-20 7:08:55 PM  
1 vote:

yet_another_wumpus: way south: mrparks: Doesn't Iran have the Really Kickass Torpedo?

Hypersonics are vaporware, yeah? They exist only in theory. It's the new mineshaft gap.

We've made some of the first kind before tho, and we had to pull back for fear of accelerating the Cold War.
If we need those then it's probably not difficult to procure them. If we want the new hotness then that's going to take a while longer.

NASA was making something called the X-43 that could fly at mach 6.8 and technically "accelerate" at mach ~11 (at least the data centered slightly above positive acceleration).  They canceled the program and now the DoD has control, no idea if they've done anything with it.  The whole idea was to make a vastly more efficient means to orbit (Scramjets have an amazing Isp).

In general, the whole thing smells of Russia drawing us down a rabbit hole, with Trump leading the charge.  There's little advantage to such things, and immense technical difficulty.  Use a slow, stealthy drone and fire a missile when it is range.  Or use a cruise missile that runs too low for RADAR.  Hypersonic is a fools errand.


So, the US is falling for the Star Wars gambit that brought down the USSR? Nice.
 
2020-05-20 3:53:09 PM  
1 vote:
In February he told governors visiting the White House: "We have the super-fast missiles - tremendous number of the super-fast. We call them 'super-fast,' where they're four, five, six and even seven times faster than an ordinary missile. We need that because, again, Russia has some."

Next time he talks about them, they'll be 8, 9, 10, even 11 times faster!

And last Friday, Trump told reporters, "We have no choice, we have to do it, with the adversaries we have out there," mentioning China and Russia. He added, "I call it the super-duper missile." He said he "heard" it travels 17 times faster than any other U.S. missile.

*facepalm*
 
2020-05-20 3:25:15 PM  
1 vote:

Gyrfalcon: Conservative Evangelical Millennial Cyclist: Call me when we have a radical rail gun

We have a radical railgun.

You mean when we have the Hammer of Dawn.


You mean the BFG-9000 for the infantry.
 
2020-05-20 3:21:53 PM  
1 vote:

BigNumber12: That whole section of the article could have been replaced by a single line, and we all would have been better off.

"President Trump is excited about hypersonic missiles and wants some, but doesn't understand them."


Hey now, that's authentic presidential gibberish.
 
2020-05-20 12:36:22 PM  
1 vote:
I believe we're doing all of this on cost plus contracts.  Which means any resulting product will be way too expensive to use, and either ridiculously complex or hopelessly overextended.

So no biggie.  A few hundred billion wasted, tops.
 
Displayed 21 of 21 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking





On Twitter




In Other Media
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.