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(Twitter)   Todd Starnes: Give me toaster ovens, or give me death   (twitter.com) divider line
    More: Dumbass, shot  
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3372 clicks; posted to Politics » on 09 May 2020 at 3:35 AM (3 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



214 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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2020-05-08 11:22:15 PM  
Original Tweet:

 
2020-05-08 11:25:47 PM  
Death
 
2020-05-08 11:27:16 PM  
FO Drama Queen
 
2020-05-08 11:29:10 PM  

bobobolinskii: Death


Yeah, I vote death.
 
2020-05-08 11:32:15 PM  
Go ahead ...burn your bridges.

They should be reminded that you're an asshole of the first order.
 
2020-05-08 11:35:14 PM  
This is satire right. Nobody is this stupid?
 
2020-05-08 11:36:49 PM  
i.gifer.comView Full Size
 
2020-05-08 11:41:36 PM  
THE TYRANTS AT KOHL'S HAVE FINALLY GONE TOO FAR!!!
 
2020-05-08 11:49:43 PM  

Gubbo: This is satire right. Nobody is this stupid?


Same guy who threw a tantrum because he went to a grocery store and saw "foreign cheese."
 
2020-05-08 11:59:17 PM  

Circusdog320: FO Drama Queen


and they call liberals snowflakes?
 
2020-05-09 12:00:34 AM  
Let's compromise and I'll toss pop tarts on his coffin.
 
2020-05-09 12:06:51 AM  
That's a waste of Pop Tarts.  😋
 
2020-05-09 12:25:36 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-05-09 12:43:43 AM  
Such a panty-dropping specimen of contemporary conservative manhood.
Too bad they're his own and they're wadded in a bunch.
 
2020-05-09 12:50:04 AM  
How many stern lectures do you think Mr. Starnes had to endure?
 
2020-05-09 1:50:46 AM  
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2020-05-09 1:52:36 AM  
Thousands dying every day due to malevolent stupidity at the highest levels, and he's whining about a tiny measure to try and slow the death rate.

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-05-09 1:53:18 AM  
There's a "person" on that tweet thread defending Starnes. The account was created in January 2020. It has sent out over 49 thousand tweets, an average of 4 tweets/minute, without stopping ever.
 
2020-05-09 1:55:55 AM  
Be careful what you wish for...

Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-05-09 2:06:16 AM  
Toast your bread according to the founders' original intent wee Todd.
i.pinimg.comView Full Size

IOW Go fork yourself, Todd.
 
2020-05-09 2:26:36 AM  
i.pinimg.comView Full Size
 
2020-05-09 2:29:07 AM  
Guys, can't you see how very, very concerned Todd is?
 
2020-05-09 2:30:34 AM  
i.redd.itView Full Size
 
2020-05-09 3:43:12 AM  
Murica is full of cowards and wusses... easy to spot them, they have a MAGA hat on and are usually fat.
 
2020-05-09 3:43:49 AM  
i.pinimg.comView Full Size
 
2020-05-09 3:46:01 AM  
There are even some people in that tweet thread supporting him and sympathising with his struggle.
 
2020-05-09 3:46:29 AM  
Give him his toaster oven in the bathtub.
 
2020-05-09 3:46:48 AM  
i.imgur.comView Full Size
 
2020-05-09 3:47:39 AM  
 
2020-05-09 3:48:45 AM  
All of these posts should read:

"I'm just not going to shop here and let this "invisible hand of the free market" that I'm always talking about work its magic."


It'd be enough if these complaints were just dumb, but they fall apart using the arguments they'd use on any normal Monday.
 
2020-05-09 3:48:59 AM  
I wonder how he'd feel if he knew that even Darth Vader follows Covid-19 recommendations.
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2020-05-09 3:52:09 AM  
He'll just have to live without his Hispanic cheese toastie.
 
2020-05-09 3:53:35 AM  
So uh, how did he manage to go through all that and still not end up with a toaster oven?
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2020-05-09 3:53:51 AM  
Ya know, TODD, you can order one online and have it delivered to you. I'm sure you can manage to wait for toast for about a week.
 
2020-05-09 3:55:32 AM  

Gubbo: This is satire right. Nobody is this stupid?


Republican ideology requires them to be "threatened" at all times. Thus, they are conditioned to support, or at least forgive, extreme measures to fight those "threats", and to vote for the assholes who are the "only ones" who are willing to fight the "threats".
 
2020-05-09 4:01:15 AM  
Was he too stupid to figure out where they were located in the store? And if the one way aisles miff you it's easy to manage if nobody is in the aisle of your interest. I was just getting a few necessities from Smiths today, and wanted to replenish my Cran-Pineapple juice that I use as a vodak mixer. (Actual reason I was there was to obtain more wet cat food - damn cat is spoiled and will eat my feet before eating the dry stuff). The juice was 10 feet in against the "do not enter" floor sign. Nobody in the aisle. Solution? Turn the cart around and pull it backwards. Nobody will notice a thing.
 
2020-05-09 4:03:52 AM  

Original: Original Tweet:


Someone cough on this biatch
 
2020-05-09 4:06:23 AM  

Fart_Machine: Hispanic cheese guy is still being oppressed.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.theat​lantic.com/amp/article/359750/


Being an oppressed white christian is apparently a very successful business model.
 
2020-05-09 4:07:48 AM  
I hope he was at least able to pick up some bleach.
 
2020-05-09 4:09:00 AM  
What's next, requiring  a license to make toast in your own damn toaster?!
This has been my favorite video on the internet for months and I just had to share it with you guys
Youtube ZjLTjLPUvpU
 
2020-05-09 4:09:01 AM  
These idiots are going to kill us all.
 
2020-05-09 4:11:38 AM  
America, you can just call it a toaster, the oven is superfluous.
 
2020-05-09 4:12:16 AM  

Gubbo: This is satire right. Nobody is this stupid?


Have you met the average Trumpanzee?
 
2020-05-09 4:13:30 AM  

Sgt Otter: Gubbo: This is satire right. Nobody is this stupid?

Same guy who threw a tantrum because he went to a grocery store and saw "foreign cheese."


Is this a thing that actually happened?  Because now I'm intrigued.
 
2020-05-09 4:15:56 AM  
3.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size
 
2020-05-09 4:16:05 AM  

Smirky the Wonder Chimp: Sgt Otter: Gubbo: This is satire right. Nobody is this stupid?

Same guy who threw a tantrum because he went to a grocery store and saw "foreign cheese."

Is this a thing that actually happened?  Because now I'm intrigued.


Yeah, he had yet another kind of persecution fantasy involving the presence of "Mexican cheese" at a grocery store.
 
2020-05-09 4:16:59 AM  

aagrajag: Smirky the Wonder Chimp: Sgt Otter: Gubbo: This is satire right. Nobody is this stupid?

Same guy who threw a tantrum because he went to a grocery store and saw "foreign cheese."

Is this a thing that actually happened?  Because now I'm intrigued.

Yeah, he had yet another kind of persecution fantasy involving the presence of "Mexican cheese" at a grocery store.


Sorry, "Hispanic Cheese".

https://www.theatlantic.com/culture/a​r​chive/2014/03/fox-columnist-startled-b​y-discovery-of-hispanic-cheese-in-the-​supermarket/359750/
 
2020-05-09 4:17:07 AM  

scottydoesntknow: There's a "person" on that tweet thread defending Starnes. The account was created in January 2020. It has sent out over 49 thousand tweets, an average of 4 tweets/minute, without stopping ever.


1) it's a bot.
2) it's a  human being whose mass is measured in tons and is literally merging with their chair like some sort of Dollar General cyborg.

I can't see any other possibilities.
 
2020-05-09 4:18:46 AM  

dericwater: Ya know, TODD, you can order one online and have it delivered to you. I'm sure you can manage to wait for toast for about a week.


Fark user imageView Full Size


I just did an Amazon search. I guess I'd have to try to get through the weekend without a toaster.
 
2020-05-09 4:20:42 AM  

dericwater: Ya know, TODD, you can order one online and have it delivered to you. I'm sure you can manage to wait for toast for about a week.


Hell, I have Amazon Prime, i could have one in two days!
 
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