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(Al Jazeera)   The official Fark-sponsored cure for Coronavirus has failed initial trials in Iran   (aljazeera.com) divider line
    More: Scary, Iran, Middle East, Methanol, alcohol poisoning, Donald Trump, Iranian health ministry spokesman, Hossein Hassanian, Ethanol  
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4215 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Apr 2020 at 1:25 PM (22 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2020-04-28 11:56:02 AM  
Methanol?  (Reads TFA), yup, even most Farkers won't touch that stuff.
 
2020-04-28 11:59:55 AM  
Well, Muslim's inexperience with booze can be traced to the culprit. Everyone here knows you avoid the best of beverages that make you go blind. Those are only for emergencies and cousins you don't like.
 
2020-04-28 12:45:44 PM  
So, Thunderbird is off the list.
MD 20/20 Watermelon is the next on the list...
 
2020-04-28 1:09:42 PM  
Wait a minute. Isn't alcohol an Islamic no-no? Don't they wind up in hell, submerged in molten brass or something for all time?
 
2020-04-28 1:13:39 PM  

Destructor: Wait a minute. Isn't alcohol an Islamic no-no? Don't they wind up in hell, submerged in molten brass or something for all time?


You really think people would do that? Violate religious doctrine?
 
2020-04-28 1:22:38 PM  

Cagey B: Destructor: Wait a minute. Isn't alcohol an Islamic no-no? Don't they wind up in hell, submerged in molten brass or something for all time?

You really think people would do that? Violate religious doctrine?


Well, look what happened this time. So, yes, Once. And then Islam-Jesus will strike them down with blindness and other disabling issues. Doesn't seem very nice.
 
2020-04-28 1:28:45 PM  
Methahol?!? Meth-infused alcohol?!?

*reads again*

Oh. Never mind...
 
2020-04-28 1:28:47 PM  

Cagey B: Destructor: Wait a minute. Isn't alcohol an Islamic no-no? Don't they wind up in hell, submerged in molten brass or something for all time?

You really think people would do that? Violate religious doctrine?


Well, ethanol is against the Koran.

Nothing in there about methanol...

/there is a good possibility that this loophole is the cause
 
2020-04-28 1:29:56 PM  
Methanol? Subby, have you been reading too many Trump tweets or something?
 
2020-04-28 1:30:17 PM  
The collective IQ of society is raising rapidly, and I'm here for it 100%.
 
2020-04-28 1:31:42 PM  

Destructor: Wait a minute. Isn't alcohol an Islamic no-no? Don't they wind up in hell, submerged in molten brass or something for all time?


No beer. No bacon.

No wonder they they are so cranky.
 
2020-04-28 1:33:12 PM  
Interestingly if you inhale methanol fumes, one way of dealing with it is consuming ethanol because your body processes it first and so you can pee out the methanol because it's broken down.
 
2020-04-28 1:33:49 PM  
Holy crap, someone other than Trump gave out bad/lethal medical advice? I'm freaking shocked. I thought that orange motherfarker was going to copyright bad Coronavirus medical advice, he dishes out so farking much of it.

(Reads the last part of TFA)
OK, we might be OK here... Some people may have still been following Trump's bad advice on disinfectants, and just substituted methanol for Lysol.
 
2020-04-28 1:33:59 PM  

tommyl66: Methahol?!? Meth-infused alcohol?!?

*reads again*

Oh. Never mind...


That's what I use to wash down my mushroom-weed-coca salad.
 
2020-04-28 1:34:52 PM  
Fellow Farkers, it's time to execute Order 66.  Send in the Spice Girls
 
2020-04-28 1:36:12 PM  

madgonad: Cagey B: Destructor: Wait a minute. Isn't alcohol an Islamic no-no? Don't they wind up in hell, submerged in molten brass or something for all time?

You really think people would do that? Violate religious doctrine?

Well, ethanol is against the Koran.

Nothing in there about methanol...

/there is a good possibility that this loophole is the cause


Yes, Mohamed was a noted organic chemist & thus spake:
Drink not of the spirits containing 2 carbon atoms, for those who drink of that liquid shall burn in Hell.
Only drink of the spirits containing 1 Carbon atom or 3 carbon atoms, for those are halal.

What about the esthers and organo-hydroxides?

//somehow I don't think so
 
2020-04-28 1:37:24 PM  

madgonad: Cagey B: Destructor: Wait a minute. Isn't alcohol an Islamic no-no? Don't they wind up in hell, submerged in molten brass or something for all time?

You really think people would do that? Violate religious doctrine?

Well, ethanol is against the Koran.

Nothing in there about methanol...

/there is a good possibility that this loophole is the cause


The specific warning is against wine, the more devoted the sect the stricter the adherence. I have known many Muslims that would drink whiskey, but never touch anything fermented from grapes.
 
2020-04-28 1:39:03 PM  
Well, of course it didn't. You can just start slamming down shots and pray it works. It takes careful nurturing and maintenance to ensure that your body becomes a microbiome in which no virus or bacteria that is evolved to survive in normal humans can survive in the toxic hellhole of your own body.
 
2020-04-28 1:39:30 PM  

starsrift: Well, of course it didn't. You can't just start slamming down shots and pray it works. It takes careful nurturing and maintenance to ensure that your body becomes a microbiome in which no virus or bacteria that is evolved to survive in normal humans can survive in the toxic hellhole of your own body.


/ ftfm
 
2020-04-28 1:41:14 PM  

starsrift: starsrift: Well, of course it didn't. You can't just start slamming down shots and pray it works. It takes careful nurturing and maintenance to ensure that your body becomes a microbiome in which no virus or bacteria that is evolved to survive in normal humans can survive in the toxic hellhole of your own body.

/ ftfm


I think the Buddhist used to practice something like this...
 
2020-04-28 1:42:24 PM  
That's the problem with living in an Islamic state. It makes you a lightweight.
 
2020-04-28 1:45:32 PM  

Resin33: That's the problem with living in an Islamic state. It makes you a lightweight.


If you are consuming methanol, then everyone is a lightweight.
 
2020-04-28 1:47:07 PM  

madgonad: Cagey B: Destructor: Wait a minute. Isn't alcohol an Islamic no-no? Don't they wind up in hell, submerged in molten brass or something for all time?

You really think people would do that? Violate religious doctrine?

Well, ethanol is against the Koran.

Nothing in there about methanol...

/there is a good possibility that this loophole is the cause


Quran, no.

Laws of biology, absolutely.
 
2020-04-28 1:47:48 PM  
sfweekly.comView Full Size
 
2020-04-28 1:50:32 PM  
I can't imagine how gross that was to drink....
 
2020-04-28 1:52:43 PM  

Hendawg: Fellow Farkers, it's time to execute Order 66.  Send in the Spice Girls


Is that what you want? What you really, really want?!?
 
2020-04-28 1:54:10 PM  
Remember when the US government killed untold numbers of Americans by deliberately poisoning them with Methanol..... if only Iran had a US history course in the curriculum.
https://slate.com/technology/2010/02/​t​he-little-told-story-of-how-the-u-s-go​vernment-poisoned-alcohol-during-prohi​bition.html
 
2020-04-28 1:55:40 PM  
I know methanol is toxic when ingested but it's still okay for topical use(hand sanitizer) right?  Or is it touch this stuff and DIE.  I know it's off this topic but just something TFA made me wonder about.
 
2020-04-28 2:00:59 PM  

Hendawg: Fellow Farkers, it's time to execute Order 66.  Send in the Spice Girls


CSB: A few years ago, I bought a dozen or so already-old Spice Girl little figurines at a dollar store. I mean, they were 15 years old and already selling on Ebay for a few bucks each. I'm a college prof, and I started secretly putting them on the bulletin board, etc, in the halls near my office and a few days later I started hearing students talking about who was doing this?

Soon thereafter, I found pinned to the board where I left one, a hand-written note that said, "THANK YOU, SPICE GIRL PHANTOM"

That note is now on my office bulletin board.

/SPICE GIRL PHANTOM
//Nowadays I do it with tiny Marvel superheroes or wee dinosaurs
///Still have one Posh
 
2020-04-28 2:03:22 PM  

tommyl66: Methahol?!? Meth-infused alcohol?!?

*reads again*

Oh. Never mind...


Florida man needs to create that stuff. It could be the next cocaine market! Whoever creates it first becomes a billionaire!
 
2020-04-28 2:12:35 PM  

Hendawg: Fellow Farkers, it's time to execute Order 66.  Send in the Spice Girls


Thought that was order 69?
 
2020-04-28 2:15:02 PM  
"In Iran, the government mandates that manufacturers of toxic methanol add an artificial colour to their products so the public can tell it apart from ethanol, the kind of alcohol that can be used in cleaning wounds."

I read that last line in the article with a silent <*wink*> emoticon.
 
2020-04-28 2:16:45 PM  

J_Kushner: madgonad: Cagey B: Destructor: Wait a minute. Isn't alcohol an Islamic no-no? Don't they wind up in hell, submerged in molten brass or something for all time?

You really think people would do that? Violate religious doctrine?

Well, ethanol is against the Koran.

Nothing in there about methanol...

/there is a good possibility that this loophole is the cause

Yes, Mohamed was a noted organic chemist & thus spake:
Drink not of the spirits containing 2 carbon atoms, for those who drink of that liquid shall burn in Hell.
Only drink of the spirits containing 1 Carbon atom or 3 carbon atoms, for those are halal.

What about the esthers and organo-hydroxides?

//somehow I don't think so


No, the esthers are Judaic, not Islamic.
 
2020-04-28 2:19:06 PM  
Trump 'did not promote' injecting disinfectant to combat coronavirus
Youtube Z-MV9sdxzcM
 
2020-04-28 2:19:56 PM  

starsrift: starsrift: Well, of course it didn't. You can't just start slamming down shots and pray it works. It takes careful nurturing and maintenance to ensure that your body becomes a microbiome in which no virus or bacteria that is evolved to survive in normal humans can survive in the toxic hellhole of your own body.

/ ftfm


Working for me so far! And yes it is hard work.
 
2020-04-28 2:25:06 PM  

TommyDeuce: Methanol?  (Reads TFA), yup, even most Farkers won't touch that stuff.


It's only Krokodil and ETHanol for me.
 
2020-04-28 2:25:52 PM  

madgonad: Cagey B: Destructor: Wait a minute. Isn't alcohol an Islamic no-no? Don't they wind up in hell, submerged in molten brass or something for all time?

You really think people would do that? Violate religious doctrine?

Well, ethanol is against the Koran.

Nothing in there about methanol...

/there is a good possibility that this loophole is the cause


What horrific restrictions. But hey, at least 50 virgins in paradise for the men.

/what do women get?
 
2020-04-28 2:26:11 PM  

seelorq: Hendawg: Fellow Farkers, it's time to execute Order 66.  Send in the Spice Girls

CSB: A few years ago, I bought a dozen or so already-old Spice Girl little figurines at a dollar store. I mean, they were 15 years old and already selling on Ebay for a few bucks each. I'm a college prof, and I started secretly putting them on the bulletin board, etc, in the halls near my office and a few days later I started hearing students talking about who was doing this?

Soon thereafter, I found pinned to the board where I left one, a hand-written note that said, "THANK YOU, SPICE GIRL PHANTOM"

That note is now on my office bulletin board.

/SPICE GIRL PHANTOM
//Nowadays I do it with tiny Marvel superheroes or wee dinosaurs
///Still have one Posh


I really, really like this story! :-)
 
2020-04-28 2:27:37 PM  
Ethanol works, I probably have not yet died from Covid-19.
 
2020-04-28 2:28:49 PM  
To be fair, none of them are currently suffering from COVID-19.
 
2020-04-28 2:36:14 PM  

GreenSun: [iFrame https://www.youtube.com/embed/Z-MV9sdx​zcM?autoplay=1&widget_referrer=https%3​A%2F%2Fwww.fark.com&start=0&enablejsap​i=1&origin=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.fark.com&​widgetid=1]


Wow, for someone who bags on Trump, that guy sure is going out of his way to put lipstick on that particular pig.

No, Trump didn't specifically say "Hey everyone, go inject Lysol", but he sure as shiat implied it, since his followers have already shown that the slightest support of something by him means that to them it was a cure handed down by God himself from a burning bush in the Rose Garden. Hell, it wasn't even Brix he was talking to, but the guy who mentioned the fact that sunlight and disinfectant were effective against the virus.

That video was pure Trump apologist bullshiat, a nation's leader spitballs a stupid "fix" for a virus and people are going to try it. He's our leader, and some people still think he knows what he's talking about, so they're going to try what he even implies tangentially...
 
2020-04-28 2:38:26 PM  

MaelstromFL: madgonad: Cagey B: Destructor: Wait a minute. Isn't alcohol an Islamic no-no? Don't they wind up in hell, submerged in molten brass or something for all time?

You really think people would do that? Violate religious doctrine?

Well, ethanol is against the Koran.

Nothing in there about methanol...

/there is a good possibility that this loophole is the cause

The specific warning is against wine, the more devoted the sect the stricter the adherence. I have known many Muslims that would drink whiskey, but never touch anything fermented from grapes.


Further proof that religion is Palin-American (sorry Fark Modmins)
 
2020-04-28 2:42:34 PM  

ColonelCathcart: madgonad: Cagey B: Destructor: Wait a minute. Isn't alcohol an Islamic no-no? Don't they wind up in hell, submerged in molten brass or something for all time?

You really think people would do that? Violate religious doctrine?

Well, ethanol is against the Koran.

Nothing in there about methanol...

/there is a good possibility that this loophole is the cause

What horrific restrictions. But hey, at least 50 virgins in paradise for the men.

/what do women get?


Mistreated.
 
2020-04-28 2:43:22 PM  
Thx!!!

But I'll stick w/an Absolute Screw!!!
 
2020-04-28 2:57:20 PM  

FarkingSmurf: I know methanol is toxic when ingested but it's still okay for topical use(hand sanitizer) right?  Or is it touch this stuff and DIE.  I know it's off this topic but just something TFA made me wonder about.


If only there were a world of information at your fingertips.
 
2020-04-28 3:42:38 PM  
"So much to drink, there's plenty in the 'fridge
I'll drink 'til I'm dead
Saturday night I like to get a little Haram
I'll drink 'til I'm dead

I'm drinking the COVID cure and Pine-Sol too.
I'll drink 'til I'm dead
Straight from the bottle, twisted again
I'll drink 'til I'm dead"

/You know Google is broken when you look up a Warren Zevon song and it comes up with a Bon Jovi song
 
2020-04-28 3:51:20 PM  

Mikey1969: Holy crap, someone other than Trump gave out bad/lethal medical advice? I'm freaking shocked. I thought that orange motherfarker was going to copyright bad Coronavirus medical advice, he dishes out so farking much of it.

(Reads the last part of TFA)
OK, we might be OK here... Some people may have still been following Trump's bad advice on disinfectants, and just substituted methanol for Lysol.


People have been giving out bogus medical advice pretty much forever. Heck, real, actual doctors used to tell people that smoking was beneficial.

Trump isn't the only one giving out stupid advice over COVID-19. Kenneth Copeland and Jim Bakker come to mind. I'm certain there are others but I'm not in a Googling mood at the moment.
 
2020-04-28 4:51:32 PM  

FarkingSmurf: I know methanol is toxic when ingested but it's still okay for topical use(hand sanitizer) right?  Or is it touch this stuff and DIE.  I know it's off this topic but just something TFA made me wonder about.


It can be absorbed through the skin and shouldn't be used topically.

https://www.cdc.gov/niosh/ershdb/emer​g​encyresponsecard_29750029.html
 
2020-04-28 5:02:39 PM  

cheap_thoughts: I can't imagine how gross that was to drink....


That would depend only on how it was made.  Methanol has no taste; it's the "contaminants" that provide the taste.  "Bathtub" gin made during Prohibition was nasty because the process would eat into the enamel and iron of the bathtub.

Whiskey wouldn't be a thing if not for sitting in charred, white oak barrels for several years.  Same for wine (aging in barrels, that is).

Russians make "paper vodka" where they use paper from old books to add flavor.  Apparently, much of the flavor comes from the various molds that inhabit the paper.

Reduce a piece of furniture to sawdust, mix in some water and yeast, allow it to ferment a few days, then run it through the distillation process.  Might have a slight coppery taste to it, or flavors from the type of wood used, but the methanol itself is flavor-free.
 
2020-04-28 5:31:33 PM  

Destructor: Wait a minute. Isn't alcohol an Islamic no-no? Don't they wind up in hell, submerged in molten brass or something for all time?


Nope. Just no virgins. Maybe a couple of grandmothers.
 
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