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(Vox)   A history of beards and pandemics, which makes us wonder if we really should fear the beard during this pandemic   (vox.com) divider line
    More: Interesting, Beard, Shaving, Influenza pandemic, Facial hair, rise of germ theory, William H. Park, health department, New York City  
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2554 clicks; posted to Main » on 31 Mar 2020 at 9:15 AM (8 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



39 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2020-03-31 8:51:23 AM  
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2020-03-31 8:58:51 AM  
Park's central idea - that whiskers entrap germs, funneling disease toward anything they touch - has no factual basis. In terms of bacterial shedding, "there is no difference in bearded and non-bearded men," said Carrie Kovarik, an associate professor of dermatology and medicine at the University of Pennsylvania. In her study of the phenomenon, Dr. Kovarik found that bearded people might actually carry fewer germs than their clean-shaven counterparts - perhaps because the "micro-trauma" that shaving inflicts on the skin opens up space for bacteria to congregate. But while Park's lactic fear mongering might seem like the bygone panic of another era, the associations of beards with disease have proven strangely resilient.

To be fair, I work in an industry where you have to be careful about a beard. Too long, and you're going to need a net to avoid shedding into food. The same reason that we wear hats--even if my shaved pate doesn't exactly shed easily. Because of working with food, I keep my beard trimmed and neat, and I avoid the more 'robust' styles that the kids are cultivating these days. Well, that and my Dad who has been hanging out with a lot of motorcycle clubs down in Texas has a long ass beard, and it's just not a look that I really want. Long beards are a pain to take care of, and I can trim my beard with a few swipes from the clippers that I use on my head.

I'm not sure that folks are going to demonize beards though, save perhaps in response to all the guys who come out of self isolation with what amount to playoff beards. Less of a demonizing than a "Jesus...can you at least tame that f*cker?"
 
2020-03-31 9:03:16 AM  
It's a struggle, I finally have the free time to be a hair farmer and grow a beard but when I HAVE a beard I can't stop stroking it like the luscious chin puppy that it is, which apparently is a no-no in this diseased era in which we live.

Why must my facial hair be so supple and tactilely irresistible?  Why must I be so strokable?

*shakes fists at the sky*

WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!?!?!?
 
2020-03-31 9:18:21 AM  

brap: It's a struggle, I finally have the free time to be a hair farmer and grow a beard but when I HAVE a beard I can't stop stroking it like the luscious chin puppy that it is, which apparently is a no-no in this diseased era in which we live.

Why must my facial hair be so supple and tactilely irresistible?  Why must I be so strokable?

*shakes fists at the sky*

WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!?!?!?


Also growing a beard for the first time during this to add to my Vandyke (it's not a Goatee!) so getting a kick.

/wife also wants to give me a mohawk for SAG.
//will certainly be called back to work for some important meeting after I get the Mohawk
 
2020-03-31 9:19:48 AM  
I've always been clean shaven, and now doesn't seem like a good time to change.
 
2020-03-31 9:23:33 AM  

brap: It's a struggle, I finally have the free time to be a hair farmer and grow a beard but when I HAVE a beard I can't stop stroking it like the luscious chin puppy that it is, which apparently is a no-no in this diseased era in which we live.

Why must my facial hair be so supple and tactilely irresistible?  Why must I be so strokable?

*shakes fists at the sky*

WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!?!?!?


Maybe in calmer times, you can grace us with the Beard of Brap.
 
2020-03-31 9:24:13 AM  
Look, if I have to live like a hermit, I'm going to damn well look like a hermit. When this is finally over, should I be one of the unlucky survivors, I want to climb blinking into the sudden sunlight with hair streaming down my back and a beard down to my navel.
 
2020-03-31 9:25:54 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-03-31 9:26:02 AM  
I'm going full "castaway" through the pandemic. No haircuts, no shaving. I'll be damned if the one time in my life I don't have to be in front of clients or onstage goes to waste.

I'm not believing the hype about beards spreading disease. "If I get corona, I get corona."
 
2020-03-31 9:27:11 AM  
I shaved off my winter beard, just like I do every spring.
 
2020-03-31 9:28:18 AM  
This is just God thinning out the hipsters herd.
 
2020-03-31 9:33:40 AM  

brap: but when I HAVE a beard I can't stop stroking it like the luscious chin puppy that it is, which apparently is a no-no in this diseased era in which we live.


I still have my "winter beard" - a tangled mess that I grow longer on the chin in order to pretend I have one.  And stroke and scritch it unconsciously all. the. time, especially when I'm ruminating or otherwise stuck in my head.
 
2020-03-31 9:34:04 AM  
i.pinimg.comView Full Size
 
2020-03-31 9:35:20 AM  
Fark headline: "which makes us wonder if we really should fear the beard during this pandemic"

TFA (capitalization in the original via styling): "THE IDEA THAT WHISKERS ENTRAP GERMS, FUNNELING DISEASE TOWARD ANYTHING THEY TOUCH, HAS NO FACTUAL BASIS."

I'm trying to figure out if this is (a) a meme reference I missed, (b) a subtle commentary on articles' headlines not matching their contents, (c) simply misleading, or (d) an alternative I haven't thought of yet.
 
2020-03-31 9:35:31 AM  
Jokes on you.  I grow penicillin in my beard.
 
2020-03-31 9:36:49 AM  
Is the bearded clam still OK?
 
2020-03-31 9:42:54 AM  

Moosedick Gladys Greengroin: Is the bearded clam still OK?


Not for, like, a Brazilian years now.
 
2020-03-31 9:48:39 AM  

Moosedick Gladys Greengroin: Is the bearded clam still OK?


Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-03-31 9:52:57 AM  
I've been bearded in some form since my senior year of high school, just shy of 2 decades. I went clean shaven last week in preparation for wearing a face mask when shiat really starts hitting the fan where I live (44 cases in my county so far, so not long now). Unfortunately, after shaving, I discovered that I never grew a chin.
 
2020-03-31 9:54:55 AM  
Fark user imageView Full Size


Why yes, myw work from home beard currently looks like hot mess, and that's the way I like it.
 
2020-03-31 9:57:40 AM  
Clean-cut with thick hair most of my life. Now, I went the other way - stopped shaving and now give myself a buzzcut/trim every weekend. The Coronavirus Swap is the nickname among a group of friends who are doing the same.
 
2020-03-31 10:00:43 AM  
I need to take about 4" off my hair and 1" off my beard .... normally I take things down to a sane level for the summer and let it go for the winter but my entire cycle is all out of whack right now.

I think I'll cut it all short for the big party my friends are planning to throw when we can do so safely again. I won't tell anyone, I'll just show up all baby faced and short haired.

Oh crap. Some of them are farkers.

/smokebomb
 
2020-03-31 10:04:19 AM  
Kick The Chair:

Fark user imageView Full Size


Missing: Pedobeard

Won't someone think of the pedos?
 
2020-03-31 10:04:30 AM  
Remember, if you shave all over you'll move faster too...
sumayse.files.wordpress.comView Full Size

/ note lack of armpit hair too
 
2020-03-31 10:06:17 AM  

Harlee: Kick The Chair:

[Fark user image 850x614]

Missing: Pedobeard

Won't someone think of the pedos?


Dammit. PedoSTACHE.

/Early.
//Not enough coffee.
///slashies come in THREES!
 
2020-03-31 10:14:30 AM  

amyldoanitrite: I've been bearded in some form since my senior year of high school, just shy of 2 decades. I went clean shaven last week in preparation for wearing a face mask when shiat really starts hitting the fan where I live (44 cases in my county so far, so not long now). Unfortunately, after shaving, I discovered that I never grew a chin.


So you're one of the greatest champions of the white race?

/wherethefarkisyourchin.jpg
 
2020-03-31 10:21:44 AM  

Harlee: Kick The Chair:

[Fark user image 850x614]

Missing: Pedobeard

Won't someone think of the pedos?


Someone OKed the toothbrush.  An always interested choice.
 
2020-03-31 10:30:02 AM  
This article sponsored by the Guys With No Chin Alliance.
 
2020-03-31 10:31:16 AM  
I always figured a beard was the first line of defense.  It can catch little infected globules headed your way and keep them off your skin, letting them dry out away from you safely.  It would be more effective if it could protect all your head openings, but certainly better than nothing.

There's still the mask conundrum to deal with, though.
 
2020-03-31 10:35:46 AM  
FTFA:

Albert Calmette, the French bacteriologist who developed a vaccination against tuberculosis for children with Camille Guerin

Too bad Calmette didn't also develop a vaccination against Camille Guerin.

C'mon, Vox. This is like, what, 6th grade grammar?
 
2020-03-31 10:59:21 AM  

brap: It's a struggle, I finally have the free time to be a hair farmer and grow a beard but when I HAVE a beard I can't stop stroking it like the luscious chin puppy that it is, which apparently is a no-no in this diseased era in which we live.

Why must my facial hair be so supple and tactilely irresistible?  Why must I be so strokable?

*shakes fists at the sky*

WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!?!?!?


Sadly, this.
 
2020-03-31 11:10:30 AM  
Regardless of how clean you keep your beard, your face-mask, if you wear one, will be less effective. Especially if you wear an air-tight mask as the beard will prevent it from sealing properly. Also, if you cough or sneeze, half of the germs and other stuff will stick to the mask, the rest will find a nice home in your beard.
 
2020-03-31 11:21:59 AM  
I have a full Santa Claus kind of beard. There are always people that comment how it "holds more poop in it than a toilet" and similar nonsense that they read on Facebook. LOTS of people fear beards, especially women. Men are often intimidated and kids don't care they refer to me as either Santa or Jesus so that's kinda cool lol.
 
2020-03-31 11:28:41 AM  

JasonOfOrillia: Harlee: Kick The Chair:

[Fark user image 850x614]

Missing: Pedobeard

Won't someone think of the pedos?

Someone OKed the toothbrush.  An always interested choice.


Hitler used to have one of those old-fashioned wide moustaches. He had to shave it to accomodate a WWI gas mask fit, I've read.

I shaved my full beard/moustache to fit my N99 mask.  I thought the toothbrush would not make a good first impression during video interviews, but I did stick with a soul patch.  Can't be hairless after so long.
 
2020-03-31 11:34:12 AM  
If growing a beard, try to avoid looking like a fake hipster, religious fanatic, crazy redneck with a love of explosives, the creepy uncle everyone avoids, a criminal, an arrogant libertarian, or your run of the mill dickhead.

Post hoc fallacy  question. Do beards gradually make people crazy, or do crazy people prefer beards.
 
2020-03-31 11:55:30 AM  
Men and all people of German descent can protect themselves by growing a beard.
 
2020-03-31 12:17:30 PM  
Let's be honest. The real threat is "man-buns". If you see one in public, cut it off immediately.
 
2020-03-31 12:39:17 PM  
I couldn't be arsed shaving every day so I've started growing one, I might go full crazy-look and get my son to give me a #3 haircut
 
2020-03-31 1:57:45 PM  
Always interesting that you see shave your beard articles but you never see any telling women to cut their long hair.

Number of times my beard has gone in my mouth = 0
Number of times my wife's hair has gone in her mouth = every time the wind blows

Number of times I've had to use my hand to brush my beard out of my eyes = 0
Number of times my wife has used her hand to brush her hair out of her eyes = seemingly every time she turns her head
 
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