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(The Detroit_News)   Meanwhile, in Detroit   (detroitnews.com) divider line
    More: Scary, Detroit, Constable, Police, chief James Craig, Detroit Free Press, The Detroit News, Detroit police officers, small number  
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5847 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Mar 2020 at 11:41 PM (15 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



32 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2020-03-20 5:58:40 PM  
vignette.wikia.nocookie.netView Full Size


One of the local radio stations plays a bumper about how New Detroit turned out better than the movies. Maybe not so much now.
 
2020-03-20 6:09:08 PM  
Panic in Detroit-David Bowie
Youtube AXxmIcsmpnQ
 
2020-03-20 11:44:36 PM  
If only there where good people with guns in Detroit.
 
2020-03-20 11:49:50 PM  
Jhesu!

Wikipedia says they got 2,200 cops

Thats ~14% of their force under quarantine
 
2020-03-20 11:50:34 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-03-20 11:54:05 PM  
I've sidelined 10% of the Detroit PD. If you haven't started preparing for a year of being a shut-in, you are just foolish. Protect yourself and your loved ones (in your home), and avoid everyone else. I'm already in your town. Your doctors and nurses know it. For life to get back to normal, you must defeat me. Every one of you has a loved one who is elderly and/or has respiratory issues. Protect them by making sure they can endure the shut-in. That is your one job right now.
 
2020-03-20 11:56:52 PM  
kentucky fried movie take him to detroit unedited
Youtube bVDDYQlmq0w
 
2020-03-20 11:57:38 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-03-20 11:58:11 PM  

Mock26: [YouTube video: kentucky fried movie take him to detroit unedited]


Goddamn!
 
2020-03-21 12:00:07 AM  
here comes the big guns

/Al's favorite
//and the days and nights just become longer
///let's see where this social experiment takes us
 
2020-03-21 12:00:23 AM  

cman: Jhesu!

Wikipedia says they got 2,200 cops

Thats ~14% of their force under quarantine


TFA says 2200, 1800 sworn
 
2020-03-21 12:02:46 AM  

coronavirus: I've sidelined 10% of the Detroit PD. If you haven't started preparing for a year of being a shut-in, you are just foolish. Protect yourself and your loved ones (in your home), and avoid everyone else. I'm already in your town. Your doctors and nurses know it. For life to get back to normal, you must defeat me. Every one of you has a loved one who is elderly and/or has respiratory issues. Protect them by making sure they can endure the shut-in. That is your one job right now.


+1 for effort, but you are a farking virus. There are absolutely no nice viruses, not to mention viruses who even hint that they can be defeated. Viruses don't give a shiat...about anything. You gotta go full honey badger or just sit the fark down and watch.
 
2020-03-21 12:08:05 AM  
What are cops in Detroit doing, exactly, and while they're in there, maybe they should be screened for OTHER, more common viruses, you know?
 
2020-03-21 12:18:26 AM  
Gives a whole new meaning to Blue Flu.
 
2020-03-21 12:25:04 AM  

Gyrfalcon: What are cops in Detroit doing, exactly, and while they're in there, maybe they should be screened for OTHER, more common viruses, you know?


According to 2018 FBI statistics, Detroit has the third-highest murder rate in the US, at 39 per 100,000 residents. I think the police in Detroit are trying to do their job while also trying to avoid getting shot and killed.
 
2020-03-21 12:26:29 AM  
The replacement cops will be there soon.


Fark user imageView Full Size


Right after they figure out to use stairs
 
2020-03-21 12:32:17 AM  

Kraig57: The replacement cops will be there soon.


[Fark user image 342x235] [View Full Size image _x_]

Right after they figure out to use stairs


I was going to point out that ED-209 probably isn't susceptible to COVID-19, but there may still be other issues.  Maybe there's an ED-2019 version.
 
2020-03-21 12:33:46 AM  
Feels like we could use a local medical practitioner

Fark user imageView Full Size


/or a pimp
 
2020-03-21 1:22:19 AM  
I'm betting more than 900 go down before this is all over. And I give it 3 days before they deploy the national guard.
 
2020-03-21 1:23:07 AM  
I used to get all up in arms when Fark would single out Detroit, but now I'm old and crochety. Anyway that said, this isn't isolated to Detroit. Look up the Baltimore police force COVID numbers when you get some time.

/anyway doesn't matter we're all going to die
//I have vodka
///cheap vodka
 
2020-03-21 1:30:40 AM  

cretinbob: [vignette.wikia.nocookie.net image 720x720]

One of the local radio stations plays a bumper about how New Detroit turned out better than the movies. Maybe not so much now.


Did they leave him his lungs? If not, he should be fine.
 
2020-03-21 1:42:29 AM  

blackminded: I used to get all up in arms when Fark would single out Detroit, but now I'm old and crochety. Anyway that said, this isn't isolated to Detroit. Look up the Baltimore police force COVID numbers when you get some time.


I imagine it's true anywhere there's a lot of poverty and people without health insurance. Thank god America is great again, huh?
 
2020-03-21 2:00:36 AM  
Declare martial law in Detroit.  Roll in the military and give them judge dredd powers.  Anybody that survives 18 months quarantine with judges bringing the law in detroit is declared a winner, and they get a free chicken dinner.
 
2020-03-21 2:24:10 AM  
Quarantined Cops, coming soon to a theater near you.
 
2020-03-21 2:47:51 AM  

coronavirus: I've sidelined 10% of the Detroit PD. If you haven't started preparing for a year of being a shut-in, you are just foolish. Protect yourself and your loved ones (in your home), and avoid everyone else. I'm already in your town. Your doctors and nurses know it. For life to get back to normal, you must defeat me. Every one of you has a loved one who is elderly and/or has respiratory issues. Protect them by making sure they can endure the shut-in. That is your one job right now.


Hey, you dink, you got the wrong the guy in my office!
 
2020-03-21 2:51:49 AM  

My Sober Alt: Kraig57: The replacement cops will be there soon.


[Fark user image 342x235] [View Full Size image _x_]

Right after they figure out to use stairs

I was going to point out that ED-209 probably isn't susceptible to COVID-19, but there may still be other issues.  Maybe there's an ED-2019 version.


You're looking for CovEd-2 09
 
2020-03-21 4:39:57 AM  

CruiserTwelve: blackminded: I used to get all up in arms when Fark would single out Detroit, but now I'm old and crochety. Anyway that said, this isn't isolated to Detroit. Look up the Baltimore police force COVID numbers when you get some time.

I imagine it's true anywhere there's a lot of poverty and people without health insurance. Thank god America is great again, huh?


Well, I can only speak for rust belt states.  A lot of those people had great jobs and premium health insurance as UAW workers.  Until their jobs got shipped off to Mexico, Europe, and then China.

ImmutableTenderloin: If only there where good people with guns in Detroit.


There are actually.  Quite a few.  This does not bode well though.  I guarantee the criminal element in Detroit is not gearing up for this because they have the mindset that whatever isn't nailed down is theirs for the taking.  Mix poverty, fear, panic, a heightened survival instinct, and isolation together and the result will be...not good.
 
2020-03-21 7:34:56 AM  
That was one busy hooker.
 
151
2020-03-21 8:08:55 AM  
Thank God this will all be over by March 30th, when everything opens back up, and I can resume having a job

/Laughs maniacally and then bursts into tears
 
2020-03-21 9:44:01 AM  
I think Detroit PD already said a week ago, due to Covid, don't call unless it's a major crime going on.

However, when I think about it, that seemed to already be the policy even in non-plague times.
 
2020-03-21 9:45:29 AM  

SirEattonHogg: I think Detroit PD already said a week ago, due to Covid, don't call unless it's a major crime going on.

However, when I think about it, that seemed to already be the policy even in non-plague times.


Yeah.  DPD was already only responding to violent or potentially violent crimes.  I'm guessing "major crime" will now be classified as sedition or open revolution.
 
2020-03-21 9:50:27 AM  

AngryDragon: SirEattonHogg: I think Detroit PD already said a week ago, due to Covid, don't call unless it's a major crime going on.

However, when I think about it, that seemed to already be the policy even in non-plague times.

Yeah.  DPD was already only responding to violent or potentially violent crimes.  I'm guessing "major crime" will now be classified as sedition or open revolution.


I really wonder how Covid is going to effect crime here.  On the one hand, people will just stay at home.  On the other hand, people who are desperate or didn't give a damn in the first place about Covid will still go out and rob businesses or settle scores.
 
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