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(Washington Examiner)   Governor of America's Madagascar: "Go ahead out to dinner. Your fat will protect you from the virus"   (washingtonexaminer.com) divider line
    More: Dumbass, United States, U.S. state, West Virginia, Virginia, Jim Justice, American Civil War, Southern United States, Kentucky  
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4220 clicks; posted to Main » and Politics » on 17 Mar 2020 at 11:35 AM (15 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



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2020-03-17 10:13:17 AM  
If you can't trust this guy with helpful health tips, I don't know who you can trust.
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-03-17 11:16:29 AM  
It's not bad here yet!

Reminds me of the old joke about the man who jumped off the Empire State building, As he passed open windows on each floor, he was heard yellin "So far, so good!"
 
2020-03-17 11:24:41 AM  
Some guys place their bets, others tempt fate.
 
2020-03-17 11:35:40 AM  
West Virginia is the only state in the union that has not yet reported any confirmed cases of COVID-19.

It says something when you get picked last by a disease.
 
2020-03-17 11:36:55 AM  
He's just worried he won't get any of the relief funds
 
2020-03-17 11:37:19 AM  
COVID-19 goes together real well with black lung.
 
2020-03-17 11:37:32 AM  
West Virginia is the only state in the union that has not yet reported any confirmed cases of COVID-19.

Too poor to travel, too uneducated for a conference, too undeveloped for business meetings.  Go on with your bad self.
 
2020-03-17 11:38:21 AM  
Quote:
"We can't stop living at this point."

Rest of Earth:
"Not to worry.  You will soon enough at the rate you're going."

There's a reason why West Virginia, eastern Ohio and western Pennsylvania are referred to as "Alabama North."
 
2020-03-17 11:38:56 AM  
A state like WV with an older, poorer population, with high rates of smoking and obesity could be in real trouble.
 
2020-03-17 11:39:07 AM  
It's a lovely headline, Subby, but America does not have a Madagascar. Have you any idea how extraordinary and big Madagascar is?  California would be America's Madagascar if California had been designed and built by Dr. Seuss.

If the is a God, he sometimes employes great artists and even let's kindergarten children design and colour some of his birds (Australia has some good examples) and fish (a good tropical reef aquarium should have a few examples).

But Madagascar is special. God commissioned Dr. Seuss (Geisel) especially for that job.
 
2020-03-17 11:39:13 AM  
They tested 80 people, what else do you monsters want of them!?
 
2020-03-17 11:39:36 AM  

Rapmaster2000: West Virginia is the only state in the union that has not yet reported any confirmed cases of COVID-19.

Too poor to travel, too uneducated for a conference, too undeveloped for business meetings.  Go on with your bad self.


You just know they're on fire with it but nobody has any test kits.
 
2020-03-17 11:42:50 AM  

TommyDeuce: It's not bad here yet!

Reminds me of the old joke about the man who jumped off the Empire State building, As he passed open windows on each floor, he was heard yellin "So far, so good!"


Reminds me of an old joke about someone learning how to parachute, where the punch line was "...pull my chute?! Hell, I can jump from here!"

It's this kind of belligerent, short-sighted idiocy, this aggressive ignorance, which characterizes the "ugly American." We're uneducated, stupid, loud, and you can't make us learn, think, or shut up, damn it!
 
2020-03-17 11:43:51 AM  
Moron.
 
2020-03-17 11:44:17 AM  

Rapmaster2000: West Virginia is the only state in the union that has not yet reported any confirmed cases of COVID-19.

Too poor to travel, too uneducated for a conference, too undeveloped for business meetings.  Go on with your bad self.


Don't forget you can't have any confirmed cases if you don't test anyone.
 
2020-03-17 11:44:31 AM  
This just in: opioids cure COVID-19.
 
2020-03-17 11:45:55 AM  
I feel bad for him.
He has to keep lying to keep his job.
And if he loses his job, there are not very many other job options in that state.
Roll coal.
 
2020-03-17 11:47:03 AM  
Is there a Covid betting pool?

Like, can we place a bet on which state will beat the rest to 5000 deaths? I want $50 on WV.
 
2020-03-17 11:47:29 AM  
F that website popup bullshiat.
 
2020-03-17 11:48:11 AM  

brantgoose: It's a lovely headline, Subby, but America does not have a Madagascar. Have you any idea how extraordinary and big Madagascar is?  California would be America's Madagascar if California had been designed and built by Dr. Seuss.

If the is a God, he sometimes employes great artists and even let's kindergarten children design and colour some of his birds (Australia has some good examples) and fish (a good tropical reef aquarium should have a few examples).

But Madagascar is special. God commissioned Dr. Seuss (Geisel) especially for that job.


You clearly have never been to West Madagascar.
 
2020-03-17 11:50:30 AM  

Rapmaster2000: A state like WV with an older, poorer population, with high rates of smoking and obesity could be in real trouble.


Or, helped tremendously.  It might be a new age of Aquarius for WV.  Death is natural.  Especially for fat old dumb people.  Let Lord Corona have his harvest.
 
2020-03-17 11:51:33 AM  
They aren't a real state.
 
2020-03-17 11:52:25 AM  

TommyDeuce: It's not bad here yet!

Reminds me of the old joke about the man who jumped off the Empire State building, As he passed open windows on each floor, he was heard yellin "So far, so good!"



I've heard that joke before, but only because it is a very good one.
 
2020-03-17 11:53:09 AM  

hugram: If you can't trust this guy with helpful health tips, I don't know who you can trust.
[Fark user image 220x267]


Maggie De Block, obviously.
i.pinimg.comView Full Size
 
2020-03-17 11:54:47 AM  

StatelyGreekAutomaton: They tested 80 people, what else do you monsters want of them!?


Well, it's as good as small poll by, say, the US News and World Report.

At least it is worth something if the people were properly selected to represent the whole US population and were't biased by any factors, such as access to affordable health care. But then, what are the odds of finding 80 people who can afford a virus test?
 
2020-03-17 11:56:06 AM  
Who wants to go to Bob Evan's? Is the line at Cracker Barrel too long?
 
2020-03-17 12:00:37 PM  
Some d-bag from WV just told me the payroll tax is great because he's still getting a paycheck. Do you have to have an IQ under 70 to live in WV, or just to support Trump?
 
2020-03-17 12:00:57 PM  

Sin'sHero: brantgoose: It's a lovely headline, Subby, but America does not have a Madagascar. Have you any idea how extraordinary and big Madagascar is?  California would be America's Madagascar if California had been designed and built by Dr. Seuss.

If the is a God, he sometimes employes great artists and even let's kindergarten children design and colour some of his birds (Australia has some good examples) and fish (a good tropical reef aquarium should have a few examples).

But Madagascar is special. God commissioned Dr. Seuss (Geisel) especially for that job.

You clearly have never been to West Madagascar.


Well, I admit that humans have destroyed half the country, but as built, it was a wonderful piece of engineering and design. Come to think of it, maybe you're right and West Virginia is Madagascar, only run by American miners instead of Coca Cola Inc. I will cede the point on a number of issues and geographical points, but not on the pre-industrial and colonial state of the country.

It goes without saying I haven't been to West Madagascar. I hear it is a bit of a dump where the land and the people have been raped and sacked by lumber companies and miners, possibly plantation farmers.
 
2020-03-17 12:01:02 PM  
How much does anybody want to bet that the reason WV has no confirmed cases is because they aren't testing at all?

I mean, you can't get any confirmed cases if there are no ways to confirm them, right?

i.kym-cdn.comView Full Size
 
2020-03-17 12:03:32 PM  

DarwiOdrade: Some d-bag from WV just told me the payroll tax is great because he's still getting a paycheck. Do you have to have an IQ under 70 to live in WV, or just to support Trump?


Some of Trump's fiercest supporters are tech geeks and thus very, very high IQ idiots, Gamerboyz, Silicon Valley cyber-fascists and the like. It is not necessary to be a gap-toothed white-entitled welfare-born and bred hillbilly moron, but of course, it helps. Every moron vote matters until the Election is over.
 
2020-03-17 12:03:59 PM  
Ignorant Hillbilly Recommends More Ignorance.

i.chzbgr.comView Full Size
 
2020-03-17 12:06:50 PM  
What an asshole
 
2020-03-17 12:06:54 PM  
So go ahead and take your sister out on a nice romantic date!
 
2020-03-17 12:07:25 PM  
Well, my work is done. I now know which American state is America's Madagascar, and I have been convinced that there are dimensions in which this is true and not the least bit hyperbolic or far-fetched.

Sad, because like Madagascar, West Virginia is very beautiful and a bit of a curate's egg: parts of it are bad and parts of it are excellent. It's mostly the manufactured landscape that is bad, and the pristine bits that are superb.
 
2020-03-17 12:09:02 PM  

DecemberNitro: Ignorant Hillbilly Recommends More Ignorance.

[i.chzbgr.com image 402x604]


Now that is the scariest horse monster photo I have ever seen, I think. And yet the camera does not lie, it is merely, as Delacroix says of all art, la sélection.

Surely this is one of the man-eating horses of the God Apollo.
 
2020-03-17 12:09:55 PM  
He admitted that the state likely has some infected people who have just not shown symptoms or been tested but maintained that most do not need to change their lives drastically.

The 90s called. It wants its bullshiat line about not wanting to use condoms back.
 
2020-03-17 12:12:03 PM  
Aren't these threads wonderful? I can quote Delacroix, make a classical allusion, and bad-mouth hillbilly gap-toothed yokels like a Simpsons cartoon. Now that's what I call literarcy and culture, even among people who can't make a proper X.

Being a Canadian, I famously use the word "culture" in the anthropological sense. Very, very classical. Like coming out of the woods and seeing a pasture and saying, as my countryfolk do, "well, back to Civilization".

Culture means agriculture too. So a pasture is a sign of culture, and thus of snivilization, to quote Herman Melville.
 
2020-03-17 12:13:22 PM  
Moron, white and fat?

wvpublic.orgView Full Size


yup
 
2020-03-17 12:13:36 PM  
I may josh you Americans, tease a bit, pull your legs, but gosh, you have created a few great things, dammit. The word snivilization is almost worth the whole of American history, such as it is, direct from barbarism to decadence, as they say.
 
2020-03-17 12:16:14 PM  
Are we Rome? (title by a brilliant American historian and pundit)

Short answer, no.

Long answer, yes.

If I had to sum up America in nine (9) words, exactly 9 words, those would be the 9.

Are we Rome?

Short answer, no.

Long answer, yes.

Viva David Mitchell!

 
2020-03-17 12:16:46 PM  
Analogy. A comparison that works very well until it stops.
 
2020-03-17 12:16:54 PM  

brantgoose: Aren't these threads wonderful? I can quote Delacroix, make a classical allusion, and bad-mouth hillbilly gap-toothed yokels like a Simpsons cartoon. Now that's what I call literarcy and culture, even among people who can't make a proper X.

Being a Canadian, I famously use the word "culture" in the anthropological sense. Very, very classical. Like coming out of the woods and seeing a pasture and saying, as my countryfolk do, "well, back to Civilization".

Culture means agriculture too. So a pasture is a sign of culture, and thus of snivilization, to quote Herman Melville.


The only things that matter are iphones, avocado toast, NYC, and LA.  That is culture.  Pasture is just stupids ooching around in the mud.  They aren't even people.  They are chuds and should shot in sight if they enter our kingdoms.
 
2020-03-17 12:18:14 PM  

JZDave: Who wants to go to Bob Evan's? Is the line at Cracker Barrel too long?


Alternatively:
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
2020-03-17 12:19:47 PM  
If I had to choose my favourite Americans, the list would definitely contain Ambroise Bierce, Mark Twain (Clemens), Herman Melville and Walt Whitman. Two homosexuals and two cynics, not bad.

Oh, and Dr. Seuss and P.T. Barnum, of course. They once met each other, you know, when Barnum was just a student drawing for the college rag or something and Barnum was semi-retired from being a great impressario, connaisseur of humbugs, and municipal politician. His proudest accomplishment, perhaps, was the water system in a small town in Connecticut. A man of many hues.
 
2020-03-17 12:23:27 PM  

Boojum2k: JZDave: Who wants to go to Bob Evan's? Is the line at Cracker Barrel too long?

Alternatively:
[Fark user image 425x531]


RIP Ted Balls.
 
2020-03-17 12:24:31 PM  

AmbassadorBooze: The only things that matter are iphones, avocado toast, NYC, and LA.  That is culture.  Pasture is just stupids ooching around in the mud.  They aren't even people.  They are chuds and should shot in sight if they enter our kingdoms.


Oh, you Democrats! Or are you Republican or Libertarian? I don't want to insult you for such a pertient illustration of Americanism. Maybe I can simply avoid partisan Tory-Whig politics and say, "Oh, you Romans! You're drunk. Go home!"

One touch of nature makes the whole world kin.

Although this Shakespear quotation is often illustrated with daisies and cute bunnies and vasaline lens shots, the "touch of Nature" was "vanity" and therefore should be illustrated with Donald J. Trump, who owns a mansion and a yacht, having rescued them from bankruptcy in defiance of justice and his creditors.

Now that would be a picture worth 1000, 1,000,000 or even 10n words.
 
2020-03-17 12:25:16 PM  

Bslim: Moron, white and fat?

[wvpublic.org image 850x566]

yup


Nickname of the Major, the Colonel, or the Senator.
 
2020-03-17 12:26:10 PM  
There's glory for you! And a knock-down argument it is, too.
 
2020-03-17 12:26:41 PM  
It's quantum mechanics to the General!
 
2020-03-17 12:27:16 PM  
Fark user imageView Full Size
 
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