Skip to content
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Daily Mail)   Texas cop feeds a homeless man a feces sandwich yet manages to keep his job. Why does it always come down to a giant douche and a turd sandwich?   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line
    More: Sick  
•       •       •

5634 clicks; posted to Main » on 25 Mar 2019 at 7:33 AM (3 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



123 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2019-03-25 04:28:21 AM  
The arbitrator cited a rule that an officer cannot be punished for conduct that occurred more than 180 days prior to the discipline

The statute of limitations on shiat sandwiches is surprisingly short.
 
2019-03-25 04:30:28 AM  
Luckhurst is still suspended for allegedly defecating without flushing in a women's toilet and smearing a brown substance on the seat in 2016 as well

Sounds like a shiatty person all around.
 
2019-03-25 04:42:08 AM  
Mother f*cking cops.  Largest gang on earth.
 
2019-03-25 06:01:31 AM  
The lesson here?
DON'T MESS WITH TEXAS
....or they'll smear poop all over everything
 
2019-03-25 07:35:52 AM  
San Antonio Police Officer Matthew Luckhurst certainly has a shiat eating grin.
 
2019-03-25 07:36:36 AM  
Maybe he can get a job at Arby's now.
 
2019-03-25 07:38:04 AM  
Protect & Serve
 
2019-03-25 07:39:25 AM  
assets.rollingstone.comView Full Size


lets see who gets this reference....
 
2019-03-25 07:41:13 AM  
let the punishment fit the crime
 
2019-03-25 07:42:23 AM  
The dude has a serious poop fetish.

Something me that he's ingested his share of feces in the past. ...shudders...
 
2019-03-25 07:42:46 AM  
Sure, everybody's bashing the poor cop, but c'mon, don't you think it's about time someone got back at those homeless people? They're always out there, living like kings and lording it over us, what with their low cost living arrangements and life of leisure. We should be so lucky! So take that, Mr.-High-and-Mighy-Homeless-Guy, someone finally gave you your comeuppance!

/Just in case sarcasm doesn't come across, f*ck this slimy bastard.
//Why isn't he facing criminal charges again?
 
2019-03-25 07:46:11 AM  

moofburger: Protect & Serve


The high courts have stated that, no, the police have no responsibility to protect and cannot be liable should they fail in protection.
Which is exactly why this cop focused on the latter part.
 
2019-03-25 07:46:28 AM  

eKonk: //Why isn't he facing criminal charges again?


img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2019-03-25 07:46:34 AM  

eKonk: Sure, everybody's bashing the poor cop, but c'mon, don't you think it's about time someone got back at those homeless people? They're always out there, living like kings and lording it over us, what with their low cost living arrangements and life of leisure. We should be so lucky! So take that, Mr.-High-and-Mighy-Homeless-Guy, someone finally gave you your comeuppance!

/Just in case sarcasm doesn't come across, f*ck this slimy bastard.
//Why isn't he facing criminal charges again?


You know the reason why. He's a cop. Cops can't commit crimes.
 
2019-03-25 07:47:55 AM  
I hope he is served a similar sandwich next time he eats at a restaurant.  Not other cops. This douchebag.
 
2019-03-25 07:50:59 AM  

moofburger: Protect & Serve


(poo sandwiches)
 
2019-03-25 07:51:39 AM  
Douche & Turdsandwich is the name of my fark poltab LP discussion blog!

/got nuthin
 
2019-03-25 07:51:41 AM  
Wanted for questioning
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2019-03-25 07:53:16 AM  
We all have to take a bite
 
2019-03-25 07:53:19 AM  
That shiat apple won't be losing his spots anytime soon. Justice is a bindfolded lady holding either a scale or a shiat sandwich? This is America. You decide.
 
2019-03-25 07:53:43 AM  

Almea Tarrant: moofburger: Protect & Serve

(poo sandwiches)


img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2019-03-25 07:54:27 AM  

LesserEvil: The dude has a serious poop fetish.


This.
Don't shake hands with Officer Poopwurst.
 
2019-03-25 07:54:31 AM  

steklo: [assets.rollingstone.com image 850x850]

lets see who gets this reference....


My response would be unprintable
 
2019-03-25 07:55:48 AM  
Does this mean that Ann-Margret's not coming?
 
2019-03-25 07:56:06 AM  
giant douche and a turd sandwich? That was the worst that BSAB had to offer.
 
2019-03-25 07:56:41 AM  
This piece of shiat fought to get his job back and won.

San Antonio Police Officer Matthew Luckhurst likes playing with poo.
 
2019-03-25 07:57:33 AM  
Is this cop a  Pink Flamingo fan?
 
2019-03-25 07:57:38 AM  
How is this not assault?
 
2019-03-25 07:58:12 AM  

Lady J: How is this not assault?


Because he put pepper on it. Not salt.
 
2019-03-25 07:59:10 AM  
Officer Luckhurst, reporting for duty!
 
2019-03-25 08:03:04 AM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2019-03-25 08:09:20 AM  
We need a Texas tag.

/lives in Texas
 
2019-03-25 08:11:43 AM  
Surprised they didn't charge him with feeding the homeless.
 
2019-03-25 08:14:11 AM  

ThomasPaineTrain: Officer Luckhurst, reporting for duty!


Shut up, Farva.
 
2019-03-25 08:14:34 AM  
Raider_dad: Does this mean that Ann-Margret's not coming?

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2019-03-25 08:16:52 AM  

moofburger: Protect & Serve


img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2019-03-25 08:16:54 AM  
They had 6 months to punish him and failed. Epic fail.
 
2019-03-25 08:17:30 AM  

Lady J: How is this not assault?


Narrator: It was...

But in San Antonio , assault had a 180 day shelf life...

If you had the right job.
 
d23 [BareFark]
2019-03-25 08:18:40 AM  
The arbitrator cited a rule that an officer cannot be punished for conduct that occurred more than 180 days prior to the discipline, but did not excuse the act.

Wonderful... so they drag out every proceeding and no one EVER gets disciplined for anything.  Police unions are a blight.
 
2019-03-25 08:28:38 AM  
I always thought a "shiat sandwich" was metaphorical.
 
2019-03-25 08:30:58 AM  

d23: The arbitrator cited a rule that an officer cannot be punished for conduct that occurred more than 180 days prior to the discipline, but did not excuse the act.

Wonderful... so they drag out every proceeding and no one EVER gets disciplined for anything.  Police unions are a blight.


Look, if you start charging police with every little crime like this, they will expect you to hold them accountable when a bigger crime happens like shooting an unarmed person.
 
2019-03-25 08:31:42 AM  

fusillade762: The arbitrator cited a rule that an officer cannot be punished for conduct that occurred more than 180 days prior to the discipline

The statute of limitations on shiat sandwiches is surprisingly short.


What the actual fark? It takes 180 days just to get a complaint anywhere. So cops can do anything and they only have 180 days to be charged?
 
2019-03-25 08:31:49 AM  
Police standards have really fallen over the years.  They shouldn't be hiring anyone with tattoos.  That is an obvious sign of someone who is not right in the head and/or who engages in criminality.  Worst part of all is that he is probably a doper, yet they have him wearing a police badge, something that once was a symbol of honor and service.
 
2019-03-25 08:35:17 AM  
This cop must be a fan of the Saviors in The Walking Dead.

"If you have to eat shiat, best not to nibble. Bite, chew, swallow, repeat. It goes quicker."

/Daryl: *boom* nibble on that.
 
2019-03-25 08:35:23 AM  

Benevolent Misanthrope: Mother f*cking cops.  Largest gang on earth.


Someone here on Fark a while back mentioned this (I forget who... could very well be you, Benevolent Misanthrope), but it has stuck with me.  This:

cdn.shopify.comView Full Size


...should only be referred to as "showing gang colors".  Since that person made that comment, I've only referred to the 'thin blue line' thing as such.
 
2019-03-25 08:36:36 AM  
Given that the story is the Daily Fail, I had some doubts about the veracity of the story, as well as the ginned-up description of the act. Anyway, I did some Google-Fu, and as far I can tell - it's true. San Antonio is a city in Texas.
 
2019-03-25 08:49:02 AM  

Xanlexian: Benevolent Misanthrope: Mother f*cking cops.  Largest gang on earth.

Someone here on Fark a while back mentioned this (I forget who... could very well be you, Benevolent Misanthrope), but it has stuck with me.  This:

[cdn.shopify.com image 488x289]

...should only be referred to as "showing gang colors".  Since that person made that comment, I've only referred to the 'thin blue line' thing as such.


img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2019-03-25 08:49:24 AM  
OK, fine, thanks to the Union Mafia rules he can't be fired. Why the f*ck isn't he charged with something?
 
2019-03-25 08:54:54 AM  
I f*cking hate cops and the whole goddamn system. I hope he is harassed for the rest of his life.
 
2019-03-25 08:57:47 AM  

ThomasPaineTrain: Officer Luckhurst, reporting for duty!


More like reporting for doody, amirite?
 
Displayed 50 of 123 comments


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Newest | Show all


View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking





On Twitter




In Other Media
Top Commented
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report