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(Daily Mail)   Looks like "Spinster" is no longer the go-to term for empowered, single women   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line
    More: PSA  
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315 clicks; posted to Discussion » on 15 Mar 2019 at 9:10 PM (6 days ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



23 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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6 days ago  
Sophia Benoit, 26, shared her discovery of the word 'thornback' on Twitter

Interesting.  I thought this was a term for women with whom you should avoid a certain sexual position
 
6 days ago  
FTFA: Sophia joked it was time for her to open a bar named Thornback where 'we only play Rom coms and the bachelor on TV.'

Hell...why not?  Might be really successful.
 
6 days ago  
Why the fark would a woman under 26 want to get married? Or over 26 for that matter.
 
6 days ago  
EXCUSE ME- I am a bluestocking.
 
6 days ago  
Why not?  They've been calling guys "pricks" for years.
 
6 days ago  

Somacandra: FTFA: Sophia joked it was time for her to open a bar named Thornback where 'we only play Rom coms and the bachelor on TV.'

Hell...why not?  Might be really successful.


That sounds horrible.
 
6 days ago  
That's "bachelor", thank you.
 
6 days ago  
"Confirmed Bachelor " was media code for gay for decades.
 
6 days ago  

optikeye: "Confirmed Bachelor " was media code for gay for decades.


It can't just mean a guy who doesn't want a ball and chain around him for the rest of his life?
 
6 days ago  

Somacandra: FTFA: Sophia joked it was time for her to open a bar named Thornback where 'we only play Rom coms and the bachelor on TV.'

Hell...why not?  Might be really successful.


Ugh. She lost me at Bachelor. That show's almost as bad as Grey's Anatomy.
 
6 days ago  
Christmas Cake?
 
6 days ago  

Mugato: optikeye: "Confirmed Bachelor " was media code for gay for decades.

It can't just mean a guy who doesn't want a ball and chain around him for the rest of his life?


Sure...maybe now.
But in the past  it was usually followed by "Confirmed Bachelor Liberace" or "Confirmed Bachelor Truman Compote"
 
6 days ago  
My high school Spanish teacher was what I now understand to be a thornback, and I distinctly remember her making us cross out spinster/soltera on the workbook page that had translations for all of the family members.
 
6 days ago  
Cat lady?

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
6 days ago  
This is supposed to get you a husband???
 
TWX
6 days ago  

optikeye: Mugato: optikeye: "Confirmed Bachelor " was media code for gay for decades.

It can't just mean a guy who doesn't want a ball and chain around him for the rest of his life?

Sure...maybe now.
But in the past  it was usually followed by "Confirmed Bachelor Liberace" or "Confirmed Bachelor Truman Compote"


Yet in My Fair Lady, Henry Higgins (or 'enry 'iggins if you prefer) was considered a confirmed bachelor and referred to as-such from the beginning and it does not appear to be because of homosexuality, but because of his boorish demeanour and what appears to be a belief at the outset that no woman is worthy of him. The only person that he treats with any kind of respect to start with is a fellow in his same profession, and even then he doesn't entirely consider the man an equal.

As for spinster as a term, since it's use is usually reserved for describing women that are not only unmarried, but are also unlikely to ever marry and are past the age in which women typically get married, it would seem that it use would now have skewed towards much older women than before, and since it also carries connotations about the carnal desirability of an unmarried woman, its use is further diminished when contextualized against better health and a greater likelihood of women establishing careers prior to settling down for marriage or other focus on family life.

I personally don't think that people should get married below around age 25, and shouldn't rush to have kids either. Get the urges of youth out of the way first such that one is ready to commit one's time to children, and to get one's career established enough to make supporting the family and having the extra benefits available to be available for the family too.
 
6 days ago  

TWX: optikeye: Mugato: optikeye: "Confirmed Bachelor " was media code for gay for decades.

It can't just mean a guy who doesn't want a ball and chain around him for the rest of his life?

Sure...maybe now.
But in the past  it was usually followed by "Confirmed Bachelor Liberace" or "Confirmed Bachelor Truman Compote"

Yet in My Fair Lady, Henry Higgins (or 'enry 'iggins if you prefer) was considered a confirmed bachelor and referred to as-such from the beginning and it does not appear to be because of homosexuality, but because of his boorish demeanour and what appears to be a belief at the outset that no woman is worthy of him. The only person that he treats with any kind of respect to start with is a fellow in his same profession, and even then he doesn't entirely consider the man an equal.

As for spinster as a term, since it's use is usually reserved for describing women that are not only unmarried, but are also unlikely to ever marry and are past the age in which women typically get married, it would seem that it use would now have skewed towards much older women than before, and since it also carries connotations about the carnal desirability of an unmarried woman, its use is further diminished when contextualized against better health and a greater likelihood of women establishing careers prior to settling down for marriage or other focus on family life.

I personally don't think that people should get married below around age 25, and shouldn't rush to have kids either. Get the urges of youth out of the way first such that one is ready to commit one's time to children, and to get one's career established enough to make supporting the family and having the extra benefits available to be available for the family too.


Unfortunately, biology argues against waiting when it comes to children.  We are seeing the rise of special needs and everyone keeps trying to say it is because of better diagnosis.  Fact is, eggs have expiration dates.  You can be the world's healthiest woman, and the eggs you were born with are still the only ones you get.  After 20 years or so, they start deteriorating, and after 30 or so years, the chances of a perfectly normal baby start really dropping.  By 40 or so years of sitting at body temp, pretty much guaranteed there will be some problem.  It may be minor or it might be devastating, but the biology data is pretty reliable.
 
6 days ago  
I prefer "old maid"
 
TWX
6 days ago  

cherryl taggart: Unfortunately, biology argues against waiting when it comes to children. We are seeing the rise of special needs and everyone keeps trying to say it is because of better diagnosis. Fact is, eggs have expiration dates. You can be the world's healthiest woman, and the eggs you were born with are still the only ones you get. After 20 years or so, they start deteriorating, and after 30 or so years, the chances of a perfectly normal baby start really dropping. By 40 or so years of sitting at body temp, pretty much guaranteed there will be some problem. It may be minor or it might be devastating, but the biology data is pretty reliable.


It's not guaranteed that having a child after 40 will result in biological problems than the child would suffer prior to the mother being age 40.

In my own anecdotal example, our daughter was born when my wife was over 40. The only thing that she might have (too young to diagnose) is mild asthma. Considering that my wife has asthma and that I have close blood relatives with asthma and I myself might have undiagnosed asthma, this does not appear to be age-of-mother related.

Certainly the odds of there being problems are increased, but a 50% or even a 100% increase in those odds doesn't mean that the actual percentage of complications compared to average is significantly higher. If children born to mothers below 40 generally see a certain ailment in around 2% of live births, then a 100% increase in chances means that around 4% of live births to mothers over 40 would see that ailment.

I actually don't advocate waiting to have children until one is in one's 40s, simply due to energy level and the onset of age-related health problems in the parents while having to deal with a minor child, but I also feel that socially, it's better for individuals to wait until they're more likely to actually stay in relationships before having kids, and I believe that it's better for being able to afford kids when one is further into one's career, regardless if one of the parents stops working to raise the child or if both remain in the workforce. If one stops, then the parent that remains is further into career generally including income, benefits, and seniority to help survive in-job during recessions, and if both remain working then the price of childcare is much easier to bear if both make substantially more than the cost of that childcare.

Ideally for us we'd have had her around five years ago, but nature decided that once we'd basically given up to bless us with her, so now we have her. And frankly, we can afford her too.
 
6 days ago  

Mugato: Why the fark would a woman under 26 want to get married? Or over 26 for that matter.


My oldest daughter was 24, and she popped out her babies before 30. Why? She understands biology and had no desire for a difficult/expensive time getting pregnant. She also didn't mess around and looked for a guy who wasn't interested in waiting.
 
5 days ago  
Gristle McThornbody
 
5 days ago  

TWX: Yet in My Fair Lady, Henry Higgins (or 'enry 'iggins if you prefer) was considered a confirmed bachelor and referred to as-such from the beginning and it does not appear to be because of homosexuality, but because of his boorish demeanour and what appears to be a belief at the outset that no woman is worthy of him.


Yeah So? Every gay guy I know would switch teams for Audrey Hepburn.
 
5 days ago  

cherryl taggart: After 20 years or so, they start deteriorating, and after 30 or so years, the chances of a perfectly normal baby start really dropping.


This is false. The best chance of a healthy baby is around 30 or a bit more. There's a tendency not to believe that, because men inherently don't have the same incentives as women to have a healthy baby, due to far less risk and investment. The idea that the optimum age is as young as possible is fundamentally a male perspective that people try to rationalize as being objective.
 
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