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(Wales Online)   For all averred, I had killed the bird That made the breeze to blow. Ah wretch said they, the bird to slay, That made the breeze to blow   (walesonline.co.uk) divider line
    More: Asinine, United Kingdom, John Llewellyn Jones, Royal Society, Prevention of Cruelty, Simon Evans, deliberate cruelty, Animals inspector, man  
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2828 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Mar 2019 at 7:31 AM (10 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2019-03-14 03:13:27 AM  
Day after day, day after day,
We stuck, nor breath nor motion;
As idle as a painted ship
Upon a painted ocean.

Water, water, every where,
And all the boards did shrink;
Water, water, every where,
Nor any drop to drink.
 
2019-03-14 03:46:10 AM  
Well, I can kind understand. Seagulls can be assholes.
Yeah...and no..the bird didn't just 'knock the chip out of his hand'

Those suckers get embolden EMBOLDEN. and go after you.

Just look at this educational video.
The Birds (8/11) Movie CLIP - Trapped in a Phone Booth (1963) HD
Youtube D15HPy4x73g

THEY KILLED THURSON HOWELL THE THIRD!
 
2019-03-14 04:07:44 AM  
And now I have to go listen to that Iron Maiden song.

*sigh*
 
2019-03-14 04:17:34 AM  
I really never wanted a barbie doll until I saw this.

img.fark.netView Full Size


I mean that's some work of art there...the costume the color the reproduction of the costume...and birds.
But I especially like how the pose is...like it's non plused "Oh bother not again SMILE" in the barbie way.
 
2019-03-14 05:19:31 AM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2019-03-14 07:16:08 AM  
Golf clap, subby.  Golf clap.
 
2019-03-14 07:18:47 AM  
BIRDEMIC!

SHOCK AND TERROR!

/Remember your coat hangers kids...
 
2019-03-14 07:26:19 AM  
i could really go for some beach fries

blog.streaminggourmet.comView Full Size
 
2019-03-14 07:39:38 AM  

Weaver95: Day after day, day after day,
We stuck, nor breath nor motion;
As idle as a painted ship
Upon a painted ocean.

Water, water, every where,
And all the boards did shrink;
Water, water, every where,
Nor any drop to drink.


My vote for the best bit is

They groaned, the stirred, they all uprose,
Nor spake, nor moved their eyes;
It had been strange, even in a dream,
To have seen those dead men rise.
 
2019-03-14 07:43:08 AM  
The Classics -- FARK style!
 
2019-03-14 07:47:01 AM  
There's an advertising opportunity here. "Chips so good you'll beat a seagull to death to get them!" Like the Brit version of "So good you'll wanna slap yo mamma."
 
2019-03-14 07:51:49 AM  
About and about,
In reel and rout, the death fires danced at night
The water, like a witch's oils
Burnt green and blue and white.
 
2019-03-14 07:53:28 AM  
As a resident of a beach community... well let's just say I'm not that outraged.
 
2019-03-14 07:54:27 AM  
I'd like to be all indignant, but I have totally booted a Canada goose that came after me.
 
2019-03-14 07:58:14 AM  
It's okay. He thought the bird was Polish.
 
2019-03-14 07:59:57 AM  

tarnok: Weaver95: Day after day, day after day,
We stuck, nor breath nor motion;
As idle as a painted ship
Upon a painted ocean.

Water, water, every where,
And all the boards did shrink;
Water, water, every where,
Nor any drop to drink.

My vote for the best bit is

They groaned, the stirred, they all uprose,
Nor spake, nor moved their eyes;
It had been strange, even in a dream,
To have seen those dead men rise.


I like the guitar solo best.

Rime Of The Ancient Mariner (2015 Remaster)
Youtube _xlDJ9YMOVE
 
2019-03-14 08:01:06 AM  
Sadly, I have to be the first.

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2019-03-14 08:02:01 AM  

gonegirl: I'd like to be all indignant, but I have totally booted a Canada goose that came after me.


So your story is aboot a Canada goose, eh?
 
2019-03-14 08:05:45 AM  
Going to the UK later this year and in planning Mrs Englaja asked me to list what I wanted to do. Seeing his grave was number 1. So plus several million for subby

Seagulls are coonts too, so bravo for appealing to my hatred for them too.
 
2019-03-14 08:08:02 AM  

optikeye: I really never wanted a barbie doll until I saw this.

[img.fark.net image 500x500]

I mean that's some work of art there...the costume the color the reproduction of the costume...and birds.
But I especially like how the pose is...like it's non plused "Oh bother not again SMILE" in the barbie way.


I got that for my 8 year old niece.
 
2019-03-14 08:08:16 AM  
I know they are jerk birds but did this seagull deserve this??

what the fark is wrong with people?
 
2019-03-14 08:09:27 AM  
Well bird bird bird, bird is the word. Everyone's talking about the bird.
 
2019-03-14 08:09:35 AM  

dittybopper: Sadly, I have to be the first.

[img.fark.net image 450x237]


You had to remind me that they canceled that show after one season. Thanks.
 
2019-03-14 08:15:13 AM  
The wild birds are a protected species under the UK's Wildlife and Countryside Act 1981.

Wait, what? Seagulls?

I mean, don't bash one to death, you sociopath. But a protected species?

Maybe Brexit won't be that bad.
 
2019-03-14 08:21:00 AM  
Approves of the judge's sentencing:

mm-group.orgView Full Size
 
2019-03-14 08:23:34 AM  

gonegirl: I'd like to be all indignant, but I have totally booted a Canada goose that came after me.


We have a flock trying to take over a retaining pond adjacent to the walking trail I prefer.  While most of us just keep walking, the geese keep moving back.  Unfortunately, there are a few that when the geese approach, they run squealing away, so the geese have gotten very bold in trying to expand their territory.  Until my bird chasing kid actually managed to bear hug one of them.  Of course, goose pooped all over my kid, trying to escape.  Geese have decided to stay on the far side of the retention pond.
 
2019-03-14 08:24:10 AM  

PoweredByIrony: The wild birds are a protected species under the UK's Wildlife and Countryside Act 1981.

Wait, what? Seagulls?

I mean, don't bash one to death, you sociopath. But a protected species?

Maybe Brexit won't be that bad.


Came here to ask about that. Is that just so old people don't bash them to death in the park or are they somehow rare and precious in the UK? This seems like making rats a protected species in New York.
 
2019-03-14 08:25:21 AM  

August11: dittybopper: Sadly, I have to be the first.

[img.fark.net image 450x237]

You had to remind me that they canceled that show after one season. Thanks.


But they made a movie that wrapped everything up by killing everyone off. So, there's that.
 
2019-03-14 08:26:57 AM  
"This was an unthinkable and despicable way to treat an animal with this gull smashed against a wall by the man solely because it knocked chips from his hand."

Slaughterhouses still ok though.
"This was deliberate cruelty borne from the fact that this man cared more for his chips than what his actions did to the poor gull. Simply, the man showed blatant disregard for an animal because he was annoyed about his chips."
It's a shame about the gull but if it didn't want to end up on the wrong end of the food chain it shouldn't be harassing humans. That never ends well.
 
2019-03-14 08:27:32 AM  
The First Chicken Fight | Family Guy | TBS
Youtube xrziHnudx3g
 
2019-03-14 08:32:20 AM  

August11: dittybopper: Sadly, I have to be the first.

[img.fark.net image 450x237]

You had to remind me that they canceled that show after one season. Thanks.


Yeah, except that's from the film, which tied up the loose ends, and threw away some of the important points of the series (like no faster-than-light communication), so it's OK.
 
2019-03-14 08:34:34 AM  
Let he among us who has not wanted to bash a sky rat cast the first stone.

Charlie?!?! It was just a saying!! Dear god there are children present! Oh my god!!

They are horrible nasty creatures, but Jesus.
 
2019-03-14 08:40:54 AM  
img.fark.netView Full Size

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2019-03-14 08:42:24 AM  
Would he be a Fark hero if he bashed a feral cat?
 
2019-03-14 08:44:06 AM  

tothekor: August11: dittybopper: Sadly, I have to be the first.

[img.fark.net image 450x237]

You had to remind me that they canceled that show after one season. Thanks.

But they made a movie that wrapped everything up by killing everyone off. So, there's that.


I'm OK with killing everyone off.  What I'm not OK with is instantaneous 'Verse-wide communications.

In the original series, if you wanted to talk to someone who was any significant distance away, you had to "send them a wave", presumably a communication similar to an e-mail, that would take a significant amount of time to travel to them, because the distances are vast.

When you got close enough, you could engage in a direct conversation with them via video chat.

You can see this in the pilot episode:

MAL   Did you send word to Patience?
WASH  Ain't heard back yet. Didn't she 
shoot you one time?
...
JAYNE   So what do we do?

MAL  The job. We finish the job. I got
word from Patience, she's waiting for
us. We circle 'round to Whitefall,
make the deal, get out. Keep flying.
...
WASH    We're being hailed.
MAL    That'd be Patience. We're close enough
for vid. Put her up.



Then we get the film Serenity, and Mal and the Operative are sitting there chatting while being who knows how many AU's away from each other just like they are sitting in the same room.
 
2019-03-14 08:45:28 AM  
Tom Lehrer obliquely approves.
 
2019-03-14 08:45:37 AM  
Seagulls are pests. There's a beach in RI where you can't eat lunch because the gulls will steal the food right out of your hand.

The ones on Martha's Vineyard, though, aren't as smart. I was eating lunch and flying my kite. Seagull came gliding along the beach, as they do, right into my kite string. He shook it off, gave me an "I meant to do that" look, and flapped away.
 
2019-03-14 08:46:17 AM  
I recall feeding them near Cape Town.
High wind.
Also fries.
I would hold a long fry with my arm outstretched and the gulls would ride the gusts of wind to my hand, not flapping.

I think a picture or even video taken from afar would have looked like I was holding a kite.

/guy probably didn't share
//and yeah, they can be annoying, but I don't condone needlessly harming/killing animals.
///and I said needlessly, so if these birds became and actual nuisance to humans, deal with them in an escalating manner
 
2019-03-14 08:50:47 AM  
img.fark.netView Full Size

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2019-03-14 08:51:54 AM  
Some days you're the windshield, some days you're the gull.
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2019-03-14 08:53:07 AM  

englaja: Going to the UK later this year and in planning Mrs Englaja asked me to list what I wanted to do. Seeing his grave was number 1. So plus several million for subby

Seagulls are coonts too, so bravo for appealing to my hatred for them too.


So are swans. Ah, I see I've been trumped.
 
2019-03-14 08:53:37 AM  

cherryl taggart: gonegirl: I'd like to be all indignant, but I have totally booted a Canada goose that came after me.

We have a flock trying to take over a retaining pond adjacent to the walking trail I prefer.  While most of us just keep walking, the geese keep moving back.  Unfortunately, there are a few that when the geese approach, they run squealing away, so the geese have gotten very bold in trying to expand their territory.  Until my bird chasing kid actually managed to bear hug one of them.  Of course, goose pooped all over my kid, trying to escape.  Geese have decided to stay on the far side of the retention pond.


For your kid.
img.fark.net
 
2019-03-14 09:03:55 AM  
So does that £85 victim surcharge go to the gull's family?
 
2019-03-14 09:05:03 AM  

Prince George: cherryl taggart: gonegirl: I'd like to be all indignant, but I have totally booted a Canada goose that came after me.

We have a flock trying to take over a retaining pond adjacent to the walking trail I prefer.  While most of us just keep walking, the geese keep moving back.  Unfortunately, there are a few that when the geese approach, they run squealing away, so the geese have gotten very bold in trying to expand their territory.  Until my bird chasing kid actually managed to bear hug one of them.  Of course, goose pooped all over my kid, trying to escape.  Geese have decided to stay on the far side of the retention pond.

For your kid.
[img.fark.net image 110x22]


Don't encourage him.  We have too many buzzards around here, cleaning up roadkill.
 
2019-03-14 09:12:15 AM  

gonegirl: I'd like to be all indignant, but I have totally booted a Canada goose that came after me.


My wife was in a park feeding the geese when she was about 7.  She was feeding them from her right hand and holding a piece of bread with her left. One of then suck up behind her and nipped her hand to get her to drop the slice in her left hand.  What the goose didn't know was that she was an abused kid that though punching was an acceptable response to pretty much any perceived wrong. Goose got thumped hard enough he staggered a bit before he ran off.

/Why are they called Canadian geese. They never apologize.
 
2019-03-14 09:17:54 AM  

Munden: i could really go for some beach fries

[blog.streaminggourmet.com image 436x581]


Rehobeth beach, here I come.
 
2019-03-14 09:38:09 AM  

dittybopper: tarnok: Weaver95: Day after day, day after day,
We stuck, nor breath nor motion;
As idle as a painted ship
Upon a painted ocean.

Water, water, every where,
And all the boards did shrink;
Water, water, every where,
Nor any drop to drink.

My vote for the best bit is

They groaned, the stirred, they all uprose,
Nor spake, nor moved their eyes;
It had been strange, even in a dream,
To have seen those dead men rise.

I like the guitar solo best.

[YouTube video: Rime Of The Ancient Mariner (2015 Remaster)]


So did Coleridge.
 
2019-03-14 09:40:15 AM  
My favorite bit from the poem comes in the prelude before the Mariner begins telling the tale. The poem is a tale  within a tale. The listener is just a chap on his way to a wedding when he's stopped by the frightful bore who tells the inner story. "He stoppeth one in three"  like the Oldest Member in PG Wodehouse's Golf stories.

The harried wedding guest tells the mariner, "Hold off! unhand me, grey-beard loon!"

Which is fantastic.

What is also fantastic is that this fabulously original poem is to a great extent knit from other works. It's very modern in that way. (My favorite poem of that sort is Radi Os by John Milton by way of Ronald Johnson. Johnson read Milton and realized that there was a poem within a poem and took an eraser to Paradise Lost to clear out the extraneous stuff. ) I love it for itself, but also because its double handed larceny excites the bugbear/fetish of "originality" in so many quarters.
 
2019-03-14 10:03:09 AM  
I was told there would be no Classical English Literature!
 
2019-03-14 10:38:30 AM  
An albatross is one thing, but no one is going to cry over a dead dump duck.

/kill 'em all
//and stack 'em like cordwood
 
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