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(BBC-US)   Police are looking for a machete gang after a targeted street attack. Degree of difficulty: nowhere near any place tropical   (bbc.com) divider line
    More: Scary, Glasgow, level of violence, middle of a busy city centre street, Det Con Craig Muir, English-language films, High Street, University of Glasgow, members of the public  
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1581 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Mar 2019 at 3:05 PM (9 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



26 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2019-03-13 02:26:30 PM  
Jackie Moon wanted for questioning.
"Give me your purse or I'll hack you sexy...."
 
2019-03-13 03:12:39 PM  
cdn3.whatculture.comView Full Size
 
2019-03-13 03:13:00 PM  
"Police said the targeted attack by up to 10 hooded men near Glasgow cathedral was "completely unacceptable"

If I was one of the culprits I'd be really embarrassed to know that.
Sorry?
 
2019-03-13 03:13:05 PM  
Yeesh.

Why is it that criminals in the UK do things that would make you wish they had guns instead? I'd rather be shot dead than walk around after being hacked with a machete or glassed with a pint.
 
2019-03-13 03:14:21 PM  
"Seriously assaulted" with multiple machetes, and didn't die?

Were the machetes just being waved around for intimidation purposes or something?
 
2019-03-13 03:15:47 PM  
Not that difficult. Still UK.
 
2019-03-13 03:17:21 PM  
"Tropical", racistmitter? Sheesh.
 
2019-03-13 03:17:24 PM  

Resident Muslim: "Police said the targeted attack by up to 10 hooded men near Glasgow cathedral was "completely unacceptable"

If I was one of the culprits I'd be really embarrassed to know that.
Sorry?


This wasn't Glasgow, Ontario, you know.
 
2019-03-13 03:17:29 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2019-03-13 03:18:26 PM  

Resident Muslim: "Police said the targeted attack by up to 10 hooded men near Glasgow cathedral was "completely unacceptable"

If I was one of the culprits I'd be really embarrassed to know that.
Sorry?


Unacceptable? They'll probably get sent to Her Majesty's Naughty Stool.

Naughty Stool
Youtube e1_GDfBSuIo


/ nawwwwwwwww
// rare Drawn Together reference
/// especially since it's only mildly NSFW
 
2019-03-13 03:22:17 PM  
Machete: The Director's Cut is taking viral marketing way to seriously.
 
2019-03-13 03:26:44 PM  
I guess I don't get why it would have to be "near any place tropical".  I suppose if it were a group of shirtless natives hacking their way through a garden center, it would be pretty conspicuous, but machetes are pretty widely available all over, and fairly cheaply.
 
2019-03-13 03:42:19 PM  

Cosmic_Music: "Tropical", racistmitter? Sheesh.


Scotland:
img.fark.netView Full Size


Machete-territory:
img.fark.netView Full Size


Not much in Scotland that calls for a machete
 
2019-03-13 03:47:47 PM  
All blades are to 'machete' what all guns are to "AK/AR"

It's also a way to drop the subtle hint that the perpetrators are dirty furriners who aren't from around here.
 
2019-03-13 03:50:09 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size

This place is across the street from where I currently find myself in Wisconsin.  I'll take one for Team Fark and go check out the scene.
 
2019-03-13 04:37:01 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2019-03-13 04:58:30 PM  

This text is now purple: Cosmic_Music: "Tropical", racistmitter? Sheesh.

Scotland:
[img.fark.net image 850x637]

Machete-territory:
[img.fark.net image 512x341]

Not much in Scotland that calls for a machete


Midges.
 
2019-03-13 05:16:14 PM  
Tropical, huh?  What else are you going to use on blackberry brambles?
 
2019-03-13 05:27:38 PM  

theDesertHamster: This text is now purple: Cosmic_Music: "Tropical", racistmitter? Sheesh.

Scotland:
[img.fark.net image 850x637]

Machete-territory:
[img.fark.net image 512x341]

Not much in Scotland that calls for a machete

Midges.


Midges the size of budgies.
 
2019-03-13 05:41:43 PM  
OK!  Senor Machetes is cleared.   Nothing extraordinary was afoot other than the Chiles Rellenos which were outstanding.

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2019-03-13 05:56:10 PM  

Incident on 57th Street: OK!  Senor Machetes is cleared.   Nothing extraordinary was afoot other than the Chiles Rellenos which were outstanding.

[img.fark.net image 729x1500]

A 22 inch tortilla? wow.

 
2019-03-13 06:59:20 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2019-03-13 07:14:08 PM  

Cosmic_Music: "Tropical", racistmitter? Sheesh.


i.imgur.comView Full Size
 
2019-03-13 07:26:29 PM  
"The victim was treated at the city's Royal Infirmary for a fractured skull and serious cuts to his body but he was later released."

Holy shiat. Imagine being hard enough that even a machete attack by 10 people only requires a brief trip to the hospital.
 
2019-03-13 08:07:47 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size

img.fark.netView Full Size

machetes, femurs, weird knives...lotta stabbin and slicin
 
2019-03-14 07:39:19 AM  

Pert: "The victim was treated at the city's Royal Infirmary for a fractured skull and serious cuts to his body but he was later released."

Holy shiat. Imagine being hard enough that even a machete attack by 10 people only requires a brief trip to the hospital.


The NHS has always been famous for: "If you can walk, then quit hogging that bed like a lazy wanker, and bugger off home". It was only brought into official policy during the austerity measures, which were necessary to allow Brexit to be afforded. Also: Glasgow is a stone-hard city. I've seen catfights in bars that made barenuckle cagefighting look like 'fisticuffs'. Even a 50kg 18 year old girl can sure do a lot of damage with a fistful of sovereign rings.

"A Fistful Of Sovvies"
"For A Few Sovvies Mair"
"The Guid, The Bad, And The Pure Minging, Bytheway."

/Glasgow is an 'experience', to put it mildly
 
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