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(Baltimore Sun)   Before you post that video of yourself attacking a pelican, remember that bird might be federally protected   (baltimoresun.com) divider line
    More: Dumbass, Florida Keys, Florida, Hunter Hardesty of Davidsonville, U.S. Route 1 in Florida, Monroe County, Florida, Key West, Florida, Anne Arundel County man, Bird  
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3032 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Mar 2019 at 3:27 AM (10 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



25 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2019-03-09 09:38:56 PM  
Maryland man goes all Florida Man on pelican.
 
2019-03-09 09:44:20 PM  
Pelican Begin Again.
 
2019-03-09 09:58:54 PM  
No, please keep uploading them. For all crimes.
 
2019-03-09 10:50:56 PM  
It appears for this person, pelican may taste like crow...
 
2019-03-10 12:37:38 AM  
Is that like when they tell me I have to stop for that Canada goose that sits in the middle of the intersection hissing at cars for no reason? Because that didnt work out so well for the goose
 
2019-03-10 03:32:17 AM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2019-03-10 03:34:54 AM  
The hell he can
 
2019-03-10 03:40:20 AM  
It's just a smart practice. I know that before I get into any street fights with large birds, I double check to make sure they aren't federally protected. It's simple common sense. If I didn't do that, I'd just look stupid.
 
2019-03-10 03:54:09 AM  
Nobody said pelican't.
 
2019-03-10 04:06:13 AM  
Great. Pelicans barely survived DDT only to have morons treat them like pool toys.
 
2019-03-10 04:27:49 AM  

TheLopper: It's just a smart practice. I know that before I get into any street fights with large birds, I double check to make sure they aren't federally protected. It's simple common sense. If I didn't do that, I'd just look stupid.


It's called the Migratory Bird Treaty Act of 1918 and there are over a thousand protected birds on its list. It's just a good idea to leave birds alone because those fines can get steep.

Full disclosure: I once punched a goose in the head while running a 5k. It was self defense.
 
2019-03-10 05:47:10 AM  

NoGods: TheLopper: It's just a smart practice. I know that before I get into any street fights with large birds, I double check to make sure they aren't federally protected. It's simple common sense. If I didn't do that, I'd just look stupid.

It's called the Migratory Bird Treaty Act of 1918 and there are over a thousand protected birds on its list. It's just a good idea to leave birds alone because those fines can get steep.

Full disclosure: I once punched a goose in the head while running a 5k. It was self defense.


All geese deserve a beating. Geese are assholes. Well done.
 
2019-03-10 06:42:18 AM  
Someone attacked Howard Stern?
/DRTFA
 
2019-03-10 07:53:08 AM  
Hunter Hardesty...my new porn name
 
2019-03-10 07:53:33 AM  
I don't think he understands that pelicans are world class shiat bombers, able to hit a target from 100 feet above. His brothers will avenge him.
 
2019-03-10 08:11:09 AM  
One of my kids is a bird chaser.  He spent many a vacation at the beach chasing seagulls and sand pipers, tiring his little legs out in the sand.  Meanwhile the birds would just amble off.  Later on, he realized that chasing geese was fun, and much easier, because hey, no sand to run through.  Geese and ducks make a lot of noise, but eventually relocate.

Swans do not.  Lesson learned.
 
2019-03-10 08:22:54 AM  

Giant Clown Shoe: NoGods: TheLopper: It's just a smart practice. I know that before I get into any street fights with large birds, I double check to make sure they aren't federally protected. It's simple common sense. If I didn't do that, I'd just look stupid.

It's called the Migratory Bird Treaty Act of 1918 and there are over a thousand protected birds on its list. It's just a good idea to leave birds alone because those fines can get steep.

Full disclosure: I once punched a goose in the head while running a 5k. It was self defense.

All geese deserve a beating. Geese are assholes. Well done.


In this case it was a misunderstanding. The race course included a lap around a pond. As I got to that part a small flock of goslings was crossing the path headed for the water. They scattered as I ran up to them and mama goose took exception. She flew straight at me, coming in about chest high from the 2 o'clock position. I punched her in side of her head and she fell behind me. I never broke my stride. At the finish line another runner said he saw the whole thing.
 
2019-03-10 08:29:08 AM  

cherryl taggart: One of my kids is a bird chaser.  He spent many a vacation at the beach chasing seagulls and sand pipers, tiring his little legs out in the sand.  Meanwhile the birds would just amble off.  Later on, he realized that chasing geese was fun, and much easier, because hey, no sand to run through.  Geese and ducks make a lot of noise, but eventually relocate.

Swans do not.  Lesson learned.


Swans not only know they're dinosaurs, they're proud of it
 
2019-03-10 09:04:13 AM  
A pelican once tried to steal my sweater.  I tried to scare it off.  The pelican was not amused and kicked my sorry butt.
 
2019-03-10 09:10:32 AM  

Fano: The hell he can


A marvelous bird is the pelican;
Its beak can hold more than its belly can.
 
2019-03-10 09:19:14 AM  

NoGods: TheLopper: It's just a smart practice. I know that before I get into any street fights with large birds, I double check to make sure they aren't federally protected. It's simple common sense. If I didn't do that, I'd ju

Full disclosure: I once punched a goose in the head while running a 5k. It was self defense.


Sounds like a euphemism for something best done in the privacy of your home.
 
2019-03-10 10:16:12 AM  

TheLopper: It's just a smart practice. I know that before I get into any street fights with large birds, I double check to make sure they aren't federally protected. It's simple common sense. If I didn't do that, I'd just look stupid.


So, a fellow expert in the area of bird law, I see. Pleasure.
 
2019-03-10 03:13:09 PM  
I wasn't getting off my butt, and getting treats. Birds will f you up. 
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2019-03-10 03:13:15 PM  
So the cage match between the Saints and the Pelicans will have to be moved in to international waters. So what?
 
2019-03-10 06:50:13 PM  
Of course the unborn child  is excluded from that.
 
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