Skip to content
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(NBC News)   Couple finds out finds out Snapchat wasn't as snappy as they thought   (nbcnews.com) divider line
    More: Dumbass, United States Army, Sergeant, murder trial of Kemia Hassel, Vietnam War, Marriage, KILL, Berrian County Judge Sterling Schrock, U.S. Army  
•       •       •

7042 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Feb 2019 at 1:34 AM (13 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



27 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2019-02-22 12:40:03 AM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2019-02-22 01:44:21 AM  
Cute couple. They both have matching pockmarks on their faces.
 
2019-02-22 01:46:15 AM  
She told police she was unhappy with her marriage, but didn't want to go through a divorce because she then wouldn't be able to receive any life insurance money

and the only reason he had to be killed is because he wouldn't die on his own
 
2019-02-22 01:51:40 AM  
There's a cool new app all the kids are using called Don't Write Down Crimes. If you begin to write down a crime, the phone just explodes in your hands because obviously you're too stupid for hands.
 
2019-02-22 01:52:22 AM  
"No one saw him at the scene. He was going to give up on this. He wasn't going to do it. There were several other suspects," Johnson said.

Wow, that was convincing.  A defense like that usually costs up to dollars a day.
 
2019-02-22 01:53:39 AM  
Find out finds out.
 
2019-02-22 01:57:20 AM  
Army Specialist Jaquan Hamilton and Army Corporal Tatanya Butler testified that they were aware of Kemia Hassel and Cuellar's affair and their plan.

That would have been good to tell someone.
 
2019-02-22 02:03:50 AM  

bacchanalias and consequences: There's a cool new app all the kids are using called Don't Write Down Crimes. If you begin to write down a crime, the phone just explodes in your hands because obviously you're too stupid for hands.


Approves
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2019-02-22 02:07:38 AM  

ThrobblefootSpectre: "No one saw him at the scene. He was going to give up on this. He wasn't going to do it. There were several other suspects," Johnson said.

Wow, that was convincing.  A defense like that usually costs up to dollars a day.


The competence of the counsel is commensurate with that of the plotters.
 
2019-02-22 02:09:34 AM  
I am curious as to how this was discovered via snapchat.  There must have been more than one outside source that started an investigation.  Or one of the folks was a real loudmouth.
 
2019-02-22 02:23:34 AM  
It's creepy how utterly unrepentant and remorseless they are, at least from the way the article's worded.

What about the kid?! What do you tell that poor kid - "sorry, but you're adopted - your mom had your dad shot by another guy, execution-style, because she wanted to keep banging that guy, and so your mom's a murderer that's spending the next 20 to life in prison?"
 
2019-02-22 02:27:46 AM  

crinz83: She told police she was unhappy with her marriage, but didn't want to go through a divorce because she then wouldn't be able to receive any life insurance money

and the only reason he had to be killed is because he wouldn't die on his own


Well, yeah, that's how life insurance works.

/anyhoo, I'd love to hear an official statement from Snapchat on this
 
2019-02-22 02:30:23 AM  

BafflerMeal: I am curious as to how this was discovered via snapchat.  There must have been more than one outside source that started an investigation.  Or one of the folks was a real loudmouth.


I may have read that wrong, but I don't think they DID discover snapchat messages.   Sounds like they got a tip off, interviewed the wife, and she broke near immediately, spilling the whole story.    The fact that they used snapchat was "discovered" but it doesn't say that they got a warrant/or a copy of those messages.
 
2019-02-22 02:31:45 AM  

crinz83: She told police she was unhappy with her marriage, but didn't want to go through a divorce because she then wouldn't be able to receive any life insurance money

and the only reason he had to be killed is because he wouldn't die on his own


So it's like 'Double Indemnity' reenacted by stupid people.
 
2019-02-22 05:12:32 AM  
Aww snap! :(
 
2019-02-22 05:31:15 AM  
I wonder if the startling level of callousness (specially toward the baby) is connected to the startling level of stupidity, or whether they're independent of each other.

I bet they're connected.  People this stupid just aren't going to be able to picture another person's point of view, or consider the consequences of their actions beyond the immediate effect on themselves.

But I'm not sure.
 
2019-02-22 06:47:05 AM  
At least we know that the taxpayer money spent training them to be killers was effective.
 
2019-02-22 07:40:07 AM  

uberaverage: At least we know that the taxpayer money spent training them to be killers was effective.


Not really... had they been properly trained, they wouldn't have been caught. That's the problem with amatuers...  only botch the job and make it harder for the rest...

Nevermind.. you're right! Awesome jorb kids!

/twiddles thumbs and walks away
 
2019-02-22 07:52:02 AM  

jjorsett: ThrobblefootSpectre: "No one saw him at the scene. He was going to give up on this. He wasn't going to do it. There were several other suspects," Johnson said.

Wow, that was convincing.  A defense like that usually costs up to dollars a day.

The competence of the counsel is commensurate with that of the plotters.


Please keep the references to Rudy in the politics tab.
 
2019-02-22 08:37:16 AM  

FormlessOne: It's creepy how utterly unrepentant and remorseless they are, at least from the way the article's worded.

What about the kid?! What do you tell that poor kid - "sorry, but you're adopted - your mom had your dad shot by another guy, execution-style, because she wanted to keep banging that guy, and so your mom's a murderer that's spending the next 20 to life in prison?"


I had a teacher in elementary school whose dad killed her mom for the insurance money, then when it was obvious he was going to be caught, killed himself.  I don't know how you come back from something like that.
 
2019-02-22 08:42:30 AM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2019-02-22 08:47:09 AM  

roc6783: FormlessOne: It's creepy how utterly unrepentant and remorseless they are, at least from the way the article's worded.

What about the kid?! What do you tell that poor kid - "sorry, but you're adopted - your mom had your dad shot by another guy, execution-style, because she wanted to keep banging that guy, and so your mom's a murderer that's spending the next 20 to life in prison?"

I had a teacher in elementary school whose dad killed her mom for the insurance money, then when it was obvious he was going to be caught, killed himself.  I don't know how you come back from something like that.


uhhh, double insurance money?

Probably a pretty comfortable teacher.
 
2019-02-22 08:55:59 AM  

Salmon: roc6783: FormlessOne: It's creepy how utterly unrepentant and remorseless they are, at least from the way the article's worded.

What about the kid?! What do you tell that poor kid - "sorry, but you're adopted - your mom had your dad shot by another guy, execution-style, because she wanted to keep banging that guy, and so your mom's a murderer that's spending the next 20 to life in prison?"

I had a teacher in elementary school whose dad killed her mom for the insurance money, then when it was obvious he was going to be caught, killed himself.  I don't know how you come back from something like that.

uhhh, double insurance money?

Probably a pretty comfortable teacher.


Fair enough.  That could pay for quite a bit of couch time.
 
2019-02-22 09:25:39 AM  

Reyito: BafflerMeal: I am curious as to how this was discovered via snapchat.  There must have been more than one outside source that started an investigation.  Or one of the folks was a real loudmouth.

I may have read that wrong, but I don't think they DID discover snapchat messages.   Sounds like they got a tip off, interviewed the wife, and she broke near immediately, spilling the whole story.    The fact that they used snapchat was "discovered" but it doesn't say that they got a warrant/or a copy of those messages.


"Everyone wants to be a gangster until it's time to do some gangster shiat."
 
2019-02-22 09:45:12 AM  
<em"No one saw him at the scene. He was going to give up on this. He wasn't going to do it. There were several other suspects," Johnson saidThe Bart Simpson defense, I see.
 
2019-02-22 10:08:08 AM  
"Kaitlin Locke, Kemia Hassel's lawyer, said her client shouldn't be charged with first-degree murder because she didn't pull the trigger."

Good luck with that.
 
2019-02-22 10:43:34 AM  
So murder was a better option than divorce? And these geniuses of course left a trail, when are these criminal masterminds going to figure our not to leave a paper and/or electronic trail?
 
Displayed 27 of 27 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking





On Twitter




In Other Media
Top Commented
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report