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(Fark)   CSB Sunday Morning: Wearing the wrong thing   (fark.com) divider line
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3744 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Jan 2019 at 9:00 AM (25 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2019-01-20 10:05:18 AM  
Most of us and the Gang showed up for Carl's wake. He had brought so many of us together over the years, and we truly mourned him.

Then Mandy walked into the sober, mournful wake full of people in their best and darkest outfits. She wore something that could best be described as a long, tie-dyed tutu, with bright green Chuck Taylors and possibly orange leggings.

My nemesis, and she looked the total opposite of my sober self; at the time, I was busy running around after my toddler. Everyone gasped, and no one knew what to do.

But years of being "the dutiful daughter" had prepared me for this, so inwardly I sighed ("Why me??? - She's my enemy!!! I hate her!!!") but did the needful: alone, I walked up to her, spread my arms wide, and hugged her tightly, letting her know that she and her grief for the man were welcome, no matter what she wore.

And so we all said farewell together to the man who'd brought us together in the first place.
 
2019-01-20 10:12:10 AM  

eyeq360: I once wore tennis shoes with a suit.

When I was in high school, I did Scholars' Bowl. For the weekend tournaments, the coach wanted you to wear a suit or clothing more formal in nature.

One weekend, we went to a tournament held at a university and all the rounds were being held in different buildings spread across the campus. So there was going to be a whole lot of walking, with the occasional hill climb. I decided to wear black tennis shoes since I was more into being in comfortable walking shoes.

We won. My feet were fine at the end of the day. The others, not so much.


Lucky. I did something similar with a group called DECA, a marketing/business-educational voc-ed program. We were in the Quiz Bowl competition, but seeing as most of the competitions are business-oriented presentations and roleplays, professional attire is pretty important, and you can be disqualified for falling short.

The national competition actually had a navy blazer you were mandated to wear with their logo and all, so that was easy to coordinate with; light Dockers, a shirt and a tie would do. But before one of our competitions, a competitor noticed that our team leader was wearing boat shoes. "Those aren't dress shoes," they pointed out...and they had us dead to rights.

Fortunately he was able to swap shoes with a friend who wasn't in the same competition at the same time. And we did okay in the long run. But it was one of those things that they could easily have enforced against us.
 
2019-01-20 10:13:12 AM  
I dressed like Tyler Durden for thirty years.
 
2019-01-20 10:13:18 AM  
I got a pic of me, young, in Partridge Family pants.


No. I won't share it.
 
2019-01-20 10:14:36 AM  
I've shown up at about ten funerals improperly dressed in my lifetime.

All the suits and dress jackets I've owned in my life were purchased before 1988, when I was young and slim.  Then I got married, and the wife spent all the clothing budget on herself, so I was making do with old worn shirts and jackets.  Then I got divorced and had even less spending money.  Then I got depressed and fat and poorer.  Now I'm finally debt free, retired and living comfortably on a fixed income.  I have spending money again, but I've no desire to spend it to look good for dead people and judgey living people.

I farking loathe fashion, brainless etiquette and traditions that exclude poor people from community events, or drive them further into poverty to conform.  I have a number of mostly dead relatives in my life at the moment.  I'll likely be the guy who shows up at his dad's funeral wearing hiking clothes, because it's what I have on hand, it fits me and is what I wear on most days.
 
2019-01-20 10:16:17 AM  

pwn3d781: Lucky. I did something similar with a group called DECA, a marketing/business-educational voc-ed program. We were in the Quiz Bowl competition, but seeing as most of the competitions are business-oriented presentations and roleplays, professional attire is pretty important, and you can be disqualified for falling short.

The national competition actually had a navy blazer you were mandated to wear with their logo and all, so that was easy to coordinate with; light Dockers, a shirt and a tie would do. But before one of our competitions, a competitor noticed that our team leader was wearing boat shoes. "Those aren't dress shoes," they pointed out...and they had us dead to rights.

Fortunately he was able to swap shoes with a friend who wasn't in the same competition at the same time. And we did okay in the long run. But it was one of those things that they could easily have enforced against us.


img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2019-01-20 10:17:31 AM  

bucket_pup: I had to go to a neighbor's funeral and I was told to bring a Yamaka. My Father-in-law told me he had one. It had been given to him by a Jewish school he had once taught at.

There I am at the grave site and EVERYBODY is wearing black. Me? I have a bright red Yamaka on my bald head. Yeah, I wished I could have traded places with the deceased.


If it makes you feel any better, there usually aren't mourning kippot/yamakas. We're they wearing the thin black plastic feeling ones?
 
2019-01-20 10:20:15 AM  
I was living out in a rural area, and hadn't worn shoes for so long that I forgot that they were part of everyday attire.  The day began with an LSD dose, not that uncommon during that college summer in the 1970s.  A friend showed up and asked if I wanted a ride to NYC, so of course I said "Of course."  We arrived and he dropped me off near where my grandfather worked as executive secretary for a religious foundation.  It was about that time I noticed my barefoot condition, and spent my only dollar on a pair of white tube socks from a street vendor.  My luck of little children and fools held up, and grandpa was at the office.
It turned out that my cousin Debbie was about to drive up to Vermont with grandpa and a long-haired cat, and could give me a ride home to Western Mass.  As we hit the BQE I removed the blackened socks and after a bit of car trouble and an overnight motel stay we made it.  I introduced my Reaganesque grandpa to my lesbian, black and Puerto Rican roommates, and was reunited with my sneakers, should I need them.
I believe that I don't have much luck anymore because I used it all up when I was that young and that dumb.
 
2019-01-20 10:22:37 AM  

libranoelrose: [i.ebayimg.com image 300x269]


I think I still have a few of those packed away somewhere.
 
2019-01-20 10:23:27 AM  
Last semester of college, second round of job interviews.  They flew me from Ohio to DC for the day to do 5 hours of interviews.  Serious suit place (defense contractor in the 80s).

It was an early flight, I didn't lay everything out the night before, and it was dark when I was getting dressed.  So I ended up wearing one blue sock and one black sock.  Didn't realize it until I was in the taxi in DC.

Whenever I was in a room with multiple people - like the group lunch thing they did with all of the candidates they'd flown in that day, I kept my ankles crossed.

I don't think anybody noticed.  And I got the job.
 
2019-01-20 10:26:58 AM  

mama2tnt: nerds.jpg


Oh, completely. Almost twenty years later, I can't help but wonder if it was some level of gamesmanship to hopefully get us out of our comfort zone. Would they REALLY have disqualified Adam for the audacity to wear boat shoes instead of dress shoes?

But for all we knew, yes, they could have, and we hadn't practiced our butts off for two years to be disqualified on account of someone's shoe choices. Besides, we weren't concerned with gamesmanship, execution or identification. We just wanted to go in and kick ass. Which we did, for the most part.
 
2019-01-20 10:29:26 AM  
i was on a cruise ship in oct 2015 and the cruise ended on november 1st. all halloween day there were announcements reminding everyone when the luggage had to be outside your cabin and to be sure to have regular clothes set aside if you wear a costume on halloween night. plenty of hungover costumed passengers were seen that morning and the freaking stairs, elevators and waiting lines were packed with idiots who were self carrying their luggage because they forgot to put it out the night before. about the worst disembarkment i ever had.
 
2019-01-20 10:30:52 AM  
1980 my first job as a chef they specified, lightweight, cotton, checked pants for work.
They had a laundry service for the help, so I picked out a pair of loud golf pants.
The team was not happy. You would have thought I had sodomized Escoffier.
At the time all pants were tiny black checks.

Flash forward, and, as all my life, I set the trend.
Old school is for mundane, and flashy caddyshack and pj styles are the rage in high end. I can tell and open or closed mind in a kitchen by pants.
 
2019-01-20 10:39:18 AM  

vudukungfu: I can tell and open or closed mind in a kitchen by pants.


img.fark.netView Full Size


...And coke-addled, drunk, and rapey by footwear.
 
2019-01-20 10:44:14 AM  
The worst thing I ever did fashionable was let my dad give me a "rat tail" for about a year or two when I was a young kid (under 10).

Typically I overdress, this way I'm usually not under prepared and it's not over the top so much that people think I'm haughty or something (I'm a teacher so I wear button collared shirts and khakis, most of the guys wear t shirts and jeans or shorts, that kind of thing).

But the best story of fashion I have is when I got an interview to teach at a community college. At that point I had only taught secondary school so I was very nervous and excited that I scored an interview. The email, while automated, said that it was an "exclusive" interview fair with only a few selected candidates being asked to come in. The fair part of it was that every department would be there, so if yo wanted to give it a shot at a different department than you originally applied for, you could. So I wear my best suit and tie, get a haircut, polish my dress shoes (never even did that for a wedding), and make a portfolio of my paperwork.

I get there, and there's literally 800 people waiting in line. I have a minor panic attack, thinking I was lied to or I was at the wrong place. After verifying that it was the right place and time, I decided to make the best of it. But I am massively overdressed. People are wearing shorts and t-shirts. I start questioning myself. After about 20 minutes in line, panic texting my wife, a man dressed in a similar way to my own walks by and says "I apologize for the massive line, however our initial "exclusive interview fair" was leaked online, thus why you are all here. There is no way to easily verify if you were actually invited or not, so we are going to just quickly interview you all, maximum three minutes each, and if we want you, then we will call you back next week."

My heart immediately relaxed and I took a deep breath. There were two guys behind me dressed in a suit and tie too. We started trying to guess who came off the internet and who was invited (we all said we were invited). The best one we found was a guy with ONE shoe and he had holes in his dirty t-shirt and stained jeans. He looked like he lived in a dumpster on purpose. Suffice to say he didn't get a call back.

/I got called back and scored the job
//That guy who gave the announcement eventually became my direct boss
 
2019-01-20 10:44:42 AM  
One of the most hilarious things I have ever witnessed played out as such, I attended the funeral of of co-worker and casual friend of mine with whom I would also go fishing and hunting fairly often.
The funeral took place in a small Alberta prairie town and the local cemetery is located a couple kilometers out of town on gravel / dirt roads that are fairly good when the weather is nice and clear.
Not so much when the roads are wet and unfortunately the weather on that day was not favourable and thunderstorms with rain were forecasted and approaching.
Nonetheless the family and a fair number of mourners went to the cemetery for the graveside service and just nicely got everything and everybody in place and it started to pour down rain with lightning, thunder and wind in the mix.
Everyone just remained where they were and proceeded to get pretty wet, in fairness there were a couple umbrellas but the wind took care of them quickly.
Anyhow, once the deceased had been lowered into the grave and the service was ending people started to head back to the small, now very muddy, parking lot.
Most of the local people had worn more weather suitable footwear and clothing because they knew what could happen but some of the family and out of town people were dressed nicely with dress type footwear on.
After 3 or 4 different people fell in the mud and after having to help free up stuck vehicles from the mud just about everyone was soaked, muddy and laughing like hell about it all.
There were a couple 4WD trucks helping pull vehicles around and that just added to the hilarity with mud and water spraying all over the place.
It was quite a humorous end to what started as kind of a sad day.
 
2019-01-20 10:45:20 AM  
I went to a Halloween Party one time in a ninja costume...but no one else was wearing theirs.

Whoops?

I also went to the wake after the funeral for my family's doctor. I never felt so inadequate (or embarrassingly underdressed) in my life. Everyone there were wearing their Sunday Best...I was in a t-shirt and jeans.

Whoops?
 
2019-01-20 10:47:39 AM  
I got invited to a friend's wedding once. I asked him what I should wear. "Oh, it's super-casual. Wear whatever you want, it'll be fine." Since it was in Seattle in November, and since my buddy said it was a really casual affair,  I wore a sweater over a button-up shirt, a pair of fairly new blue jeans, and black leather side-zip boots. Every other male at the wedding was in a gorramn suit and tie!I wanted to just crawl into a hole somewhere. And what made it worse, people kept insisting on introducing me to pretty young single ladies, when I was feeling like a total boor with no fashion sense and just wanted to be invisible until I could leave without seeming rude.
 
2019-01-20 10:47:48 AM  
In the early '80's, I attended a toga party.  But, the togas were canceled.  I was the only person wearing a toga.
 
2019-01-20 10:48:12 AM  
Not mine, but this guy was part of a group waiting for a bike race to go by:
- - - 
s.abcnews.comView Full Size
 
2019-01-20 10:48:27 AM  
Where I am it's currently sub zero Fahrenheit. When I cleared the driveway of snow I wore

1 pair of boots
2 pairs of socks
1 each thermal top n bottom
My huge green ugly and kinda sheep smelling sweater


And, I still don't look that douchebaggy.
 
2019-01-20 10:49:08 AM  

a particular individual: I borrowed nylon swim trunks at a friend's pool party. My mom was there, and her friends. When the trunks got wet, and clung to my skin, they were almost transparent. So, yeah... It was like that dream where you realize you're naked in front of everyone.


A friend of mine volunteered to do sewing for the athletes at the Commonwealth Games when they were held in Victoria 10-20 years ago. One big job was putting modesty panels in the fronts of the swimming suits one country had supplied to its athletes. Same problem: wet swim suit = transparency.

My friend is a bit of a dirty old lady (though she conceals this from her extensive family) and said she enjoyed dealing with athletes wearing few or no clothes while the seamstresses were adjusting fit.

Many more years ago, the Finnish national [ice] hockey team were in town. I won't sully the otherwise pristine pages of Fark by describing her reaction. (All mental, nothing physical.) This has been the source of a long-standing joke between us about how many Finnish hockey players she has stashed under her bed.

Finnish hockey players are quite small men, btw.
 
2019-01-20 10:54:42 AM  

eyeq360: I once wore tennis shoes with a suit.

When I was in high school, I did Scholars' Bowl. For the weekend tournaments, the coach wanted you to wear a suit or clothing more formal in nature.

One weekend, we went to a tournament held at a university and all the rounds were being held in different buildings spread across the campus. So there was going to be a whole lot of walking, with the occasional hill climb. I decided to wear black tennis shoes since I was more into being in comfortable walking shoes.

We won. My feet were fine at the end of the day. The others, not so much.


I have a new pair of black Reebok ankle high with Velcro and laces that only get used for formal events....with polish, they pass just fine.
 
2019-01-20 10:56:01 AM  
Yeah, ok, I got a cool story bro about wearing the wrong thing.

I just wore so-called "skiing" gloves coz they're supposed to be extra warm but I damn near froze my farking fingers off while doing the 1st of several rounds of snow shoveling, and the storm ain't nowhere near over.

COLD STORY BRO
 
2019-01-20 11:12:36 AM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2019-01-20 11:15:38 AM  
At engineering college graduation, wore a blue dress shirt with a yellow tie, in homage to a Mormon colleague who seemed more on point with his attire.

Family goes to dinner afterwards. Every farking waiter was dressed just like me, down to the pattern on the tie.

/never got a job on any degree
//wears his billionaire tech bro hoodie and Nikes eveyday
 
2019-01-20 11:17:07 AM  

hoodiowithtudio: bucket_pup: I had to go to a neighbor's funeral and I was told to bring a Yamaka. My Father-in-law told me he had one. It had been given to him by a Jewish school he had once taught at.

There I am at the grave site and EVERYBODY is wearing black. Me? I have a bright red Yamaka on my bald head. Yeah, I wished I could have traded places with the deceased.

If it makes you feel any better, there usually aren't mourning kippot/yamakas. We're they wearing the thin black plastic feeling ones?



Despite the pronunciation, they are called yarmulkes.
 
2019-01-20 11:19:19 AM  

Englebert Slaptyback: hoodiowithtudio: bucket_pup: I had to go to a neighbor's funeral and I was told to bring a Yamaka. My Father-in-law told me he had one. It had been given to him by a Jewish school he had once taught at.

There I am at the grave site and EVERYBODY is wearing black. Me? I have a bright red Yamaka on my bald head. Yeah, I wished I could have traded places with the deceased.

If it makes you feel any better, there usually aren't mourning kippot/yamakas. We're they wearing the thin black plastic feeling ones?


Despite the pronunciation, they are called yarmulkes.


Oh.  I thought he was talking about motorcycles.
 
2019-01-20 11:22:20 AM  

starlost: i was on a cruise ship in oct 2015 and the cruise ended on november 1st. all halloween day there were announcements reminding everyone when the luggage had to be outside your cabin and to be sure to have regular clothes set aside if you wear a costume on halloween night. plenty of hungover costumed passengers were seen that morning and the freaking stairs, elevators and waiting lines were packed with idiots who were self carrying their luggage because they forgot to put it out the night before. about the worst disembarkment i ever had.


They've gotten a bit better, but they still fall short managing the disembarkment.

Protip: self-carry, earliest possible slot.
Source: Cruise to Bermuda in October, RCCL. Left from Boston, Miami is always a clusterfark.
 
2019-01-20 11:24:31 AM  
I was told Russia was cold  and wet. So I packed long sleeves and jeans. It was true for St.Petersburg, but it was 97 degrees in Moscow. I ended up buying gym shorts and a t-shirt.

Was told I would need a cold weather parka for the Andes. Still wore a T-shirt at 12,000+ feet altitude. 
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2019-01-20 11:24:53 AM  

Fear the Clam: When Mrs Clam was about ten, her parents took her to England and Scotland. She'd read all sorts of books (written by Brits) perpetuating the lie about how England summers are so hot ("Lord Peter thirsted for lemonade..."), and packed shorts and tee shirts. Totally inappropriate, especially when they went to the upper Hebrides. To this day, she won't forgive British writers and their lies about hot summers.


When I first started grad school a couple of my friends wanted to head up to San Francisco for the day because San Francisco.  It was about 80 and sunny, a typical beautiful day on the peninsula and they wondered why I was dressed in jeans and a couple of layers including a sweatshirt.

It didn't take them long to figure it out.
 
2019-01-20 11:27:42 AM  
1975.  High school debate club, yearbook team pictures day.  Black t-Shirt with hot-press lettering, in the style of the day:

"Debaters Do It Orally"
I thought I was so clever.

A vice principal made me turn the shirt inside-out the rest of the day. In the yearbook team photo that got printed , the lab had blacked out the lettering  with a smear of black paint, not airbrushing, just a random shmeer in a lighter shade of black than the shirt. Which, in a way, made it cooler, by creating a mystery.
 
2019-01-20 11:34:11 AM  
I was an engineer in college, but I was in the top wind band there.  We were getting ready for a small tour and they wanted a good promo picture of us, so our director told us we all had to be in concert dress promptly at 3 o'clock when we rehearse so we can get pictures taken.  And he was that kind of director I'm sure a lot of you have had with that 'To be early is to be on time; to be on time is to be late' mentality, so I made sure to walk into the building with my tuxedo on.

Only problem was, I was an engineer, and my previous class was in a different building and ended 10 minutes earlier.  So I did the only thing I could, logistically - I went to a chem 101 lecture with 200+ people in it in a tuxedo.  I don't have the greatest vision so I had to sit in the first few rows in college, and when I sat down and pulled my dress shoes out of my backpack to change them I could already feel the weird looks.  I'm pretty sure the professor hesitated a couple times when she saw me in her lecture dressed to the nines.

And, of course, after I dashed over to the music building, people were changing clothes when I got there.  Oh well.
 
2019-01-20 11:53:18 AM  
When I was 18, I studied Russian in Ottawa. I'm not sure if it was just because we were there or if somebody had connections, but we got invited to the Russian Embassy for a soriee. I don't know what I was thinking, as I did have nicer clothes, but I wore a nice blouse, I think, and very wide-legged jeans. I think they were as big at the ankles as they were at the waist. I don't know what I was thinking. I did realize that I was out of place, so I left early because I "wasn't feeling well,"
Later, my class sang "Ochi Cherniye" (Black Eyes) for Mrs. Putin while she was in town with her husband for some thing. We practised for weeks, but when it came time to perform, I actually was sick, so I didn't get to go. Oh well. I probably would have worn the wrong thing again.
 
2019-01-20 11:58:01 AM  
12th grade, weight training PE class, 1st period. The teacher had just acquired these large metal open frame platforms for jumping in a bunch of different sizes:

jumpusa.comView Full Size


I was doing okay on my size so he encouraged me to go to the next higher one. Okay. First jump, my left leg comes out a little and catches my shin under the frame. Stings.  Girl starts screaming, and it turns out I gashed open my leg and was bleeding prodigiously all over the floor with little bits of muscle here and there.

Anyway, after clamping my hand down over the hole and almost fainting on my way to the nurse (the teacher didn't see the wound, just some blood and my hand holding my leg...after I fell over outside, he got the nurse to come to me with a wheelchair), they got it covered up and stopped the flow of blood, and then I just had to sit there and wait for my dad to arrive to take me to the hospital.  Well, all my stuff was still in the locker room and I was in my nasty gym clothes, so they let me in to get it and change.

I'm a lover of great nerdy, dorky, witty, etc. T-shirts, and that day I had decided to wear a shirt I bought in San Francisco. It was black and in big white and red letters said "Alcatraz Psycho Ward: Outpatient". So there we are, in the local hospital emergency room waiting our turn, when a nurse runs up to us and (very discreetly, thankfully) informs us that the admission area for their mental health ward shared the lobby we were in and could I please turn my shirt inside out lest there be an "issue" with the patients. We agreed, and I turned it inside out, but not before there was much giggling on our part over how silly it sounded at the time.
 
2019-01-20 12:05:06 PM  
First time ever on a sailboat. Late Fall in the Pacific Northwest. No one told me what to wear and I didn't bother to ask.

I showed up in jeans, sneakers and a sweatshirt. About halfway through our 6 hour outing the wind picked up and it began raining hard. Our return leg was upwind, so the last couple hours were like getting firehosed.

I stayed topside the whole time, determined not to puss out, despite repeated invitations to go below and warm up. Learned later that no one was impressed. Instead, they all wondered if I was a bit "special" and whether they'd have to take me to the hospital for hypothermia. To this day it's the coldest I've ever been.
 
2019-01-20 12:08:00 PM  
Maybe 3 years ago, my nephew/God son was getting married, and I was asked to do a reading during the wedding. My daughters were asked to be ushers as well so we had to go to the rehearsal. Since I hit my mid 50's I pretty much wear what I want, within reason of course. So I show up at the rehearsal in nice cargo shorts, a Hawaiian shirt, flip flops, and a Milwaukee Brewer baseball cap. The secondary minister, who is an uncle of the bride to be, from out of town and NOT clergy from the Catholic church in question, gave me shiat for my attire, telling me it was inappropriate. Whatever dude.... There actually were family dressed more casual than me.
Anyway, the main kicker to this whole shiatshow was about a month before the wedding, I had found out from my daughters that the parents of the bride to be were horrible homophobic fundamentalists who had barred a gay friend of my nephew from being in the wedding. How the parents even knew this fact is beyond me but I knew what I had to do. Day of the wedding, I'm wearing my black suit, black button up shirt, black shoes, paired with the most awesome rainbow tie you've ever seen. These fundies are so ignorant that I don't even know if they picked up on the significance of the tie, but I got a lot of high fives and first bumps from a lot of people that day.
 
2019-01-20 12:25:47 PM  
I have the worst luck with wedding wardrobe malfunctions/mishaps:

Dec 1994, at a wedding in New Smyrna Beach FL, was wearing a decent suit. Something ripped in a seam, I forget where exactly. Either the crotch below the zipper or the zipper itself, but this happened at the beginning of the reception. It was warm (Florida) but I kept my jacket on the entire night as this hid the tear and my crotch was exposed to nobody.

Another wedding, March 1999: drive from Atlanta to NJ to be the best man. Forgot my dress socks, so had to overpay for new socks.

Wedding, May 2002, NJ. Remembered by coat, khakis, socks, shoes, tie. Forgot my dress shirt. Realized the error that morning. No time, had to attend wedding with a polo shirt under sport coat. Retrospect, I don't care. The bar served only Bud Light, and the groom wears nothing but NRA t shirts.

Wedding, April 2006. My entire family is in wedding, I'm best man, wife is bridesmaid. Rented a really nice tux. The clasp at the hip broke during the wedding so my trousers kept falling down. Spent entire reception holding them with one hand until someone found a safety pin which helped only slightly.

My dad's funeral in Jan 07, went to NJ with all the appropriate clothing, didn't bring a tie. My dad hated ties and tried to avoid wearing them. My brother brought 2 and demanded I wear one. I gave in to avoid fighting.

I also went to a fraternity Halloween party at a bar, dressed as the Dread Pirate Roberts. I included my father's fencing saber. It didn't occur to me that bringing a freaking sword into a bar in a college town might have been frowned upon.
 
2019-01-20 12:35:59 PM  
Wore a Heineken t shirt to the Carlsberg brewery tour.
The tour guide commented on it.
 
2019-01-20 12:39:37 PM  
For my stepsons upcoming nuptials in September, I was informed that I need to wear a tux.
They have since backed off, and its now 'just a suit'.

Screw that. I'm going full 1940's jazz musician tux.
Like Jim Carrey The Mask, but not yellow.
 
2019-01-20 12:43:50 PM  
I once went to a wedding where the bride's (female) cousin showed up wearing a dirty, wrinkled Insane Clown Posse T-shirt and ripped jeans that showed off her plumber's crack. Everyone else was in typical wedding attire; dresses and suits. Also, her date had a warrant and ended up getting arrested in the parking lot during the reception.

/The C-ist part of this S is that the groom later ended up fleeing that family and marrying me instead.
//I wore a dress to his wedding but not to ours, which was at the courthouse with the 2 of us in matching jeans and T-shirts
///CSS
 
2019-01-20 12:58:39 PM  
Probably my worst fashion faux paw is always dressing up for Halloween.  I have this cool pair of horns that tie on, and the tie blends in really well under my hair.  Fluff my already bushy hair, and it looks like the horns are a natural occurrence.  It's a great subtle outfit, no long term planning, and easy storage, cause the rest of the year, the horns hold scrunchies.

However, when you work in a church, some people don't know how to react.
 
2019-01-20 12:59:33 PM  
As was typical in those days, I wore men's white button-down dress shirt over jeans and sneakers for my mother's wake, which was held by my father in their house.

It wasn't until I was undressing that night at home that I realized the dress shirt had been on inside-out all day. In my grief, of course I hadn't noticed. I have no idea if no one else noticed or if anyone who did was simply being kind.
 
2019-01-20 01:02:08 PM  

kb7rky: I went to a Halloween Party one time in a ninja costume...but no one else was wearing theirs.


There are many faux pas at nudist colonies.
 
2019-01-20 01:05:06 PM  
Let's see.  At my college commencement ceremony I wore under my robes: a skin tight flesh colored Pink Floyd Animals '72 tour tee so threadbare it was like a stocking, crusty old cutoffs that probably could have levitated on their own aura of dirt, grease, and climbing chalk, and flip flops.

And a few years ago I thought I had a brilliant idea for a Halloween costume:  George Pepard as Hannibal Smith.  mrs bughunter went to a pro costume shop and got me the kit: a Santa suit and an AR15 replica that was rather far too accurate.  I had a big ol fat stogie in a baby blue wrapper.  I was set.

Except: the beard smelled like vomit, the cigar was horrible, and I was afraid the unholster the rifle in public.  I'd begun to think I'd made an error until I realized that it was all of the cute teenage girls waving and hollering "It's Santa!  Hiiiiii Santa!  Can I sit on your lap Santa?"

Yea, now that I know that, it's definitely the wrong thing to wear.  I'm a long way from 18, but Mr Happy still gets ideas of his own sometimes.

Maybe another farker might get lucky (or convicted) with that lesson...
 
2019-01-20 01:07:52 PM  
 My buddy, Chris was heading off to the Marines and a couple of us were seeing him off.
This was pre-9/11 when you could go right to the gate. I used to dress fairly "metal". So going through security, I set off the metal detector. I removed my long coat. Still set it off. Steel toe boots. Wallet with chain. Still going off.
So, the poor lady had to wand me. Right over my waist, it started beeping. I forgot about the belt.
It was similar to the scene in Spinal Tap.
 
2019-01-20 01:09:24 PM  
Oh yeah, just remembered another one:

Friend of mine called me half amused/half incredulous.  He just got back from marrying off his step daughter (civil service).  The father of the bride was excited/happy because the occasion gave him the opportunity to wear his good Led Zeppelin t-shirt...

/family was from deep in one of those infamous KY hollers
//groom had been exposed to civilization for quite a while by then & was in a suit
 
2019-01-20 01:19:04 PM  
I'm not wearing pants right now, and feeling a bit overdressed for this crowd.

/AWKWARD!!!
 
2019-01-20 01:20:39 PM  
My older brother lived in Hawaii for about 35 years, and my wife and I attended the wedding for his older daughter, a full on catered affair at a really nice hotel. I showed up for the ceremony in my usual wedding/funeral suit and was getting a lot of sideways looks. My brother sent me to the hotel shop to get a proper Hawaiian shirt and I ditched the jacket and tie in our room. (The pants were acceptable.)

On the flipside, a couple of years ago my wife and I attended a soccer game in Miami, OK that our granddaughter was playing. Miami is only about 80 miles NE of Tulsa up I-44 and it was about 75 degrees when we left home. Luckily I am pretty diligent about keeping track of the weather and when we got there it was about 40 degrees with the wind howling out of the north. We had coats and a blanket but almost everyone else was in a T shirt, or at most a sweatshirt. They all kept saying, "But it was 75 when we left home!"
 
2019-01-20 01:21:44 PM  

Richard Saunders: I'm not wearing pants right now, and feeling a bit overdressed for this crowd.

/AWKWARD!!!


No csb?

You fail, sorry.
 
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