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(The Toque)   Bachelor Tips: mooching meals.   ( thetoque.com) divider line
    More: Amusing  
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5313 clicks; posted to Main » on 23 Jan 2002 at 12:33 AM (16 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

29 Comments     (+0 »)
2002-01-23 12:35:04 AM  
Plastic bags huh? You learn something every day.
2002-01-23 12:39:09 AM  
I would like to say that I am above such things. However, it would be a lie.
2002-01-23 12:40:56 AM  
I have mastered this art... Shiat, i could teach a class...
2002-01-23 12:44:04 AM  
For a person going to college soon (i.e. *me*), this is something very good to know.

Wait, did I fark up the grammar on that last sentence?


I'm going to bed.
2002-01-23 12:46:43 AM  
Shigelojoe Since you're college bound I offer you this...Almost everyday of the week, at your college, somewhere a group is having an open meeting with free pizza and pop for all who attend. Best part is, they usually let you leave after you eat if you start being an ass.
2002-01-23 12:48:04 AM  
Oh, wonderful... I hope not everyone out there is so easily gullible...
2002-01-23 12:49:12 AM  
The mastery of collegiate food ninjas has been passed down in dorms for years, from sensai to freshman, since the Han Dynasty. Once it was believed that Master Food Ninja Tomuo Nagaki stole an entire 5-course meal from the Fairmont Hotel in San Francisco in under 50 seconds, using the legendary "Look over there" technique. Needless to say, Tomuo died of a heart attack at age 25.

One day, I'll be a master of food ninjitsu. Just you wait!

2002-01-23 01:08:26 AM  
Living on ramen is a way of life.
2002-01-23 01:13:13 AM  
Strange.... people usually get worked up by these articles...
2002-01-23 01:16:57 AM  
so, since i'm drunk, stoned and it's 1am I'm a ninja?? And I thought I was just Jesus
2002-01-23 01:20:51 AM  
Jesus Ninja- A formidable force indeed!

Would you have throwing crosses?
oh that was bad.
2002-01-23 02:23:04 AM  
So that's why my married friends keep feeding me! Long live ramen!!
2002-01-23 03:20:51 AM  
When I was on the road playing music, I mastered the art of meal mooching. Not to mention mooching of beer and places to stay.
2002-01-23 04:57:13 AM  
The easiest way is to constantly chat up different rich-biatches, fleece them for as much free food as you can get, and leave when they start talking about meeting their mothers!
2002-01-23 05:01:09 AM  
His entire site is ripped off The Good Bachelor Guide by P J O'Rourke, which is infinitely superior.
2002-01-23 06:30:29 AM  
& goatman is a punk.
2002-01-23 06:58:36 AM  
Halpas: Your point being? Or are you pointless, like your bio claims? Full of teen angst, fighting against a disinterested, uncaring adult world, are we?

Awww... nevermind. Perhaps you could kill yourself like Kurt Cobain did! Or at least pick up a smack problem in tribute.
2002-01-23 07:53:04 AM  
This guy just seems like a lazy bastard.
2002-01-23 08:34:13 AM  
I wonder why this guy is single.
2002-01-23 08:41:50 AM  
ArmyOfFun: Its nice to see someone else say "pop" and not "soda"
2002-01-23 09:43:00 AM  
The life of a food ninja is wrought with peril and hardship. The student of food ninjutsu must always be prepared to eat nothing but the rice and textured vegetable protein he stores in his secret pockets. The food ninja must refine his senses to detect which fast food establishments will give him free food to stop being a complaining asshole. Life is a constant battle against the samurai of hunger, and moving absolutely silently is impossible with a grumbly stomach. The ninja must not only memorize, but internalize the five elemental Ramen recipes (Ramen soup, Ramen w/ Sour Cream, Ramen w/ Stir Fried Vegetables, Ramen & Meatballs, Ramen Pad Thai). So, pupils of food ninjutsu, may you have luck in your new life of noodles, rice, and food-jacking, and never forget -grumble- dammit, where's that last twizzler?
2002-01-23 09:51:36 AM  
Why hasn't some lovely lady snatched up this gem?:
[image from thetoque.com too old to be available]
2002-01-23 09:56:51 AM  
GrassHopper: Maybe its the whole GrassHopper name?
2002-01-23 10:14:01 AM  
If I had known some of this I wouldn't have had to eat microwaved baked potatoes for three weeks.
2002-01-23 10:18:44 AM  
Eee. That's not me....that's the guy who wrote the article[image from forums.off-topic.net too old to be available]
2002-01-23 11:47:57 AM  
Moochos gracias.

Shigelojoe , fellow-college-farkers, check out http://phd.stanford.edu/comics archives for more college food advice.
2002-01-23 12:24:57 PM  
He is very cute!! Looks like Leonardo Di Capro. I will cook him up anything he wants!
2002-01-23 12:41:48 PM  
Bachelors are the best thing to ever happen to those moldy leftovers you're debating throwing out. Just cook up a nice casserole and ta-da! Bachy dindin!
And you didn't have to move all those boxes yourself.
2002-01-24 01:16:51 AM  
ah, sorry GrassHopper
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