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(Click Orlando)   Police seek man accused of performing lewd acts since 2015, claim he's gotten stale and needs to learn some new material already   ( clickorlando.com) divider line
    More: Florida, Victim, lewd act, Orlando, Florida, Police, The Victim, multiple similar lewd, Sheriff, Inch  
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2247 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Nov 2018 at 1:10 AM (2 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



25 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2018-11-06 01:21:53 AM  
Is he funny enough not to work blue?
 
2018-11-06 01:23:54 AM  
"The suspect armed himself with a crossbow, aimed at officers, police said. Officers told the man he would not be taken alive due to the threats."
"The man eventually gave himself up after some time and was arrested immediately. The suspect's name is being withheld pending arraignment."

So... white guy.
 
2018-11-06 01:26:17 AM  
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2018-11-06 01:34:45 AM  
Running around masturbating onto cars is no way to go through life..
 
2018-11-06 01:39:27 AM  

IbiEvacua: Running around masturbating onto cars is no way to go through life..


what if the car is really hot, and looking at you like that...
 
2018-11-06 01:40:01 AM  
Pfft, amateur. I've been performing lewd acts since at least 1999.
 
2018-11-06 01:41:49 AM  
the man got onto the hood of her vehicle, got back down, then went to her driver's side door, where he completed the lewd act


.
IYKWIMAITYD
 
2018-11-06 01:44:48 AM  

IbiEvacua: Running around masturbating onto cars is no way to go through life..


Not with that attitude, it's not.
 
2018-11-06 01:48:01 AM  

Harlee: "The suspect armed himself with a crossbow, aimed at officers, police said. Officers told the man he would not be taken alive due to the threats."
"The man eventually gave himself up after some time and was arrested immediately. The suspect's name is being withheld pending arraignment."

So... white guy.


I dunno, the Asian guy that mugged me with a crossbow last week might be clouding my judgement.
 
2018-11-06 02:33:01 AM  
I see things are proceeding apace for Shia LeBeouf's Comeback Tour

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-11-06 02:56:33 AM  
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2018-11-06 03:05:45 AM  
Wasn't he supposed to be doing a comeback tour of some kind?

/ Louis?
 
2018-11-06 03:24:12 AM  
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You know who else used like luude acts?
 
2018-11-06 05:35:42 AM  
Stale lewd acts? Was it Dice Clay?

/that's twice I mention him in 24 hours, for a total of twice for the past four years maybe. :/
 
2018-11-06 05:52:54 AM  
Louie?
 
2018-11-06 07:17:59 AM  
The man was wearing a beanie cap
He shouldn't be difficult to spot.
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2018-11-06 07:20:08 AM  

Harlee: "The suspect armed himself with a crossbow, aimed at officers, police said. Officers told the man he would not be taken alive due to the threats."
"The man eventually gave himself up after some time and was arrested immediately. The suspect's name is being withheld pending arraignment."

So... white guy.


You might want to repost this in the previous thread.
 
2018-11-06 07:41:13 AM  
All he wanted was a "thank you Masked Man."
 
2018-11-06 08:18:10 AM  

some_beer_drinker: IbiEvacua: Running around masturbating onto cars is no way to go through life..

what if the car is really hot, and looking at you like that...


Keep drinking those beers.

i.imgur.comView Full Size
 
2018-11-06 08:20:54 AM  
Campus police on scene...

Cop1: Here's the swab, it's your turn to collect it from the car door.
Cop2: Oh gross. Are you kidding me?
Cop1: The newbie always takes the swab, here...put it in this evidence bag.
Cop2: Oh geez, it's all over the car door handle too.
Cop1: Make sure to get enough so the lab can get the DNA.
Cop2: You're really making me do this? This is gross.
Cop1: To protect, and serve.

The moral of this story is someone, somewhere, it's their job to swab human bodily fluids....
 
2018-11-06 08:59:37 AM  
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2018-11-06 09:36:51 AM  
It was nice of her to wait until he finished before driving away....
 
2018-11-06 10:26:48 AM  
Bang Bus guys looking in every direction nervously ...
 
2018-11-06 10:27:22 AM  

IbiEvacua: Running around masturbating onto cars is no way to go through life..


At least he wasn't shagging the tailpipe.

And I never thought in my life I would type/say/think that as a qualifying statement to anything. Truly, we are at the new frontier.
 
2018-11-06 10:45:11 AM  

xxBirdMadGirlxx: At least he wasn't shagging the tailpipe.


No, he should've been. Know how hot a tailpipe gets when the car has been running a while?

Severe burns would've cured him from ever doing this again.
 
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