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(FOX6Now)   "Hello, this is the Sheriff. You have a warrant for your arrest, so I demand that you buy me some gift cards. I prefer Amazon, Walmart, and those ones where you can pick from five shiatty restaurants"   ( fox6now.com) divider line
    More: PSA, Police, Washington County Sheriff, Telephone, Sheriff, Criminal law, Constable, Member of Parliament, Law  
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5313 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Sep 2018 at 1:20 PM (8 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2018-09-13 01:16:41 PM  
You have to appreciate how flexible they are on payment methods.  I gave the IRS an iTunes gift card to take care of some taxes I somehow forgot to pay.  And that was it -- they never contacted me again!  It's rather efficient.
 
2018-09-13 01:24:04 PM  
I occasionally get threatening voicemails from scammers claiming to be from the IRS. It's awfully tempting to go off on them and yell "come and get me, farking feds!" But you just know that if I did those bastards would swat me.
 
2018-09-13 01:24:11 PM  
I got a voicemail the other day from someone with a heavy accent claiming that there is a legal action being filed against me and my physical address, and I'm currently under federal investigation.  Unless I call the number back immediately, they would be forced to continue the legal action.

No name, no department, nothing, just a phone number.  I had to admire the determination of the scammer.
 
2018-09-13 01:26:08 PM  
Seems legit, where do I sign up?
 
2018-09-13 01:26:56 PM  
Man this civil asset forfeiture thing has gone off the rails.
 
2018-09-13 01:27:42 PM  

Driedsponge: No name, no department, nothing, just a phone number.  I had to admire the determination of the scammer.


It's a filter. Anyone even slightly skeptical rolls their eyes and ignores it, so the only folks who call in are the folks without an ounce of common sense in them - they're virtually guaranteed to be an easy mark.

The best way to combat these folks is to call in and waste their time. I've been building up a script of my fake name, fake details, delaying tactics, etc. to see how long it takes before they start calling me a farking asshole.
 
2018-09-13 01:28:39 PM  
The sheriff gave me double credit with Hooters cards...
 
2018-09-13 01:29:34 PM  
Mrs. Eaton got a call from a jury duty scammer a while back.  He was pretty convincing, but we were unconvinced.  They called her again a week later and she said "oh, is this the jury duty scam?"  *click*  Sometime I'd like them to call when I'm in an expansive mood and have time on my hands, it could get amusing.
 
2018-09-13 01:29:59 PM  

KRSESQ: I occasionally get threatening voicemails from scammers claiming to be from the IRS. It's awfully tempting to go off on them and yell "come and get me, farking feds!" But you just know that if I did those bastards would swat me.


img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-09-13 01:30:57 PM  
Scam du jour is the "we've become aware of some malicious activity on your computer". I sat and listened to his spiel and when he asked me if I was at my computer I said yeah, I'm watching porn, hey, what are you wearing? I've never had anyone hang up on me so fast.

JC
 
2018-09-13 01:32:35 PM  

ceejayoz: Driedsponge: No name, no department, nothing, just a phone number.  I had to admire the determination of the scammer.

It's a filter. Anyone even slightly skeptical rolls their eyes and ignores it, so the only folks who call in are the folks without an ounce of common sense in them - they're virtually guaranteed to be an easy mark.

The best way to combat these folks is to call in and waste their time. I've been building up a script of my fake name, fake details, delaying tactics, etc. to see how long it takes before they start calling me a farking asshole.


I used to do that trick with the Microsoft Technical Support cold-callers.  I used to time how long it took to get them to curse at me.
 
2018-09-13 01:32:52 PM  
Got a call the other day from a nice young lady at the "Card Services Department".  She asked if I would like to lower the interest rates on my credit cards.  I responded hell yeah I would.  But before I do could you send me a picture of your boobs?  She hung up.
 
2018-09-13 01:34:10 PM  

ceejayoz: Driedsponge: No name, no department, nothing, just a phone number.  I had to admire the determination of the scammer.

It's a filter. Anyone even slightly skeptical rolls their eyes and ignores it, so the only folks who call in are the folks without an ounce of common sense in them - they're virtually guaranteed to be an easy mark.

The best way to combat these folks is to call in and waste their time. I've been building up a script of my fake name, fake details, delaying tactics, etc. to see how long it takes before they start calling me a farking asshole.


https://www.google.com/amp/s/motherbo​a​rd.vice.com/amp/en_us/article/bj8wg4/w​e-talked-to-the-hacker-who-flooded-all​eged-irs-scammers-with-robocalls
 
2018-09-13 01:34:31 PM  
No donut shops?

OBVIOUS FAKE!
 
2018-09-13 01:36:41 PM  
Johnny Cash 'How High is The Water Momma'
Youtube pyZD7eoHZT8
 
2018-09-13 01:36:52 PM  

ceejayoz: Driedsponge: No name, no department, nothing, just a phone number.  I had to admire the determination of the scammer.

It's a filter. Anyone even slightly skeptical rolls their eyes and ignores it, so the only folks who call in are the folks without an ounce of common sense in them - they're virtually guaranteed to be an easy mark.

The best way to combat these folks is to call in and waste their time. I've been building up a script of my fake name, fake details, delaying tactics, etc. to see how long it takes before they start calling me a farking asshole.


I try to have them cut me in on their profits since I'm sick of standing up for gullible morons. I might as well make a few bucks off them.

I should open a PAC that's targeted at conservatives, and then use the money to elect liberals.  Pretty sure that routine's been done before with minimal legal action against the founder.
 
2018-09-13 01:37:42 PM  

priapic_abandon2: [Youtube-video https://www.youtube.com/embed/pyZD7eoH​ZT8]


Dang, wrong thread. Oh well.
 
2018-09-13 01:38:35 PM  
I have a guy in my email who is telling me my phone has malware and that he's gonna release that secret video recording unless i pay him in Bitcoin.     I've been stringing him along for far too long.  literally about 15 back and forth messages.

/I hope he doesn't really have any video recording because he seems mad right now.
 
2018-09-13 01:38:45 PM  
Lately i've been answering by just giving sensual moaning until they hang up.
 
2018-09-13 01:39:19 PM  
My favorite are the robocalls I get of some woman speaking Mandarin.

Gives me the weirdest boner.
 
2018-09-13 01:39:19 PM  

KRSESQ: I occasionally get threatening voicemails from scammers claiming to be from the IRS. It's awfully tempting to go off on them and yell "come and get me, farking feds!" But you just know that if I did those bastards would swat me.


Too bad people aren't swatting the scammers.
 
2018-09-13 01:40:36 PM  
shiatty restaurants?
Some people don't deserve unlimited breadsticks.
 
2018-09-13 01:40:36 PM  
Driedsponge:
I used to do that trick with the Microsoft Technical Support cold-callers.  I used to time how long it took to get them to curse at me.

When I'm bored I tell them I only have a Linux machine.  I beg them to tell me how to fix that.   It's hilarious.
 
2018-09-13 01:40:39 PM  
If anyone* actually falls for this, you probably deserve to lose your money.

I have gotten calls in the last two weeks telling me the IRS is coming for me and I will be put "into jail as soon as they arrive", and one for a warrant for my arrest for ____________.  (No reason given). And of course my spam folder is filled with "your online bank account has been frozen".

It's like they don't even try anymore.

*anyone does not include anyone of any age who is not in complete charge of their mental acuity for any reason whatever, be it age, mental issues, sickness effects, etc
 
2018-09-13 01:40:50 PM  
Isn't it "we" have a warrant?
 
2018-09-13 01:41:29 PM  

T.rex: I have a guy in my email who is telling me my phone has malware and that he's gonna release that secret video recording unless i pay him in Bitcoin.     I've been stringing him along for far too long.  literally about 15 back and forth messages.

/I hope he doesn't really have any video recording because he seems mad right now.


I too have seen this episode of Black Mirror. Hope you're the driver so you don't have to fight to the death.
 
2018-09-13 01:42:47 PM  

Diogenes: You have to appreciate how flexible they are on payment methods.  I gave the IRS an iTunes gift card to take care of some taxes I somehow forgot to pay.  And that was it -- they never contacted me again!  It's rather efficient.


And I don't feel safe anymore; oh what a mess
I wonder who's watching me now - the IRS?

I always feel like somebody's watching meeeeeeeee...
 
2018-09-13 01:43:38 PM  
I had one of those guys on the phone a while ago. He waited on dead air for ten minutes after I told him to wait for the "FBI to knock on his door." It's good fun when you have a slow day at work.
 
2018-09-13 01:43:55 PM  

JoeCowboy: Scam du jour is the "we've become aware of some malicious activity on your computer". I sat and listened to his spiel and when he asked me if I was at my computer I said yeah, I'm watching porn, hey, what are you wearing? I've never had anyone hang up on me so fast.

JC


stranger things have happened: Got a call the other day from a nice young lady at the "Card Services Department".  She asked if I would like to lower the interest rates on my credit cards.  I responded hell yeah I would.  But before I do could you send me a picture of your boobs?  She hung up.


your newsletters....I wish to subscribe to them

CSB:
in college we would play phone baseball (old Siemens/ROLM digital system) and the caller ID phones had just started coming out so it got a bit riskier towards the end of school....usually around 4:30 in the morning when we got back drunk.....you randomly dial an extension but never say anything, if the don't pick up or hang up without a word, you get an out. for each hello after the first you got a base, if you got cursed at, you got a home run.
/CSB
 
2018-09-13 01:44:46 PM  

stranger things have happened: Got a call the other day from a nice young lady at the "Card Services Department".  She asked if I would like to lower the interest rates on my credit cards.  I responded hell yeah I would.  But before I do could you send me a picture of your boobs?  She hung up.


I've had similar calls. I play along, letting them offer me a discount on my card payments. By the time I get to "So how much can I save on $0 per month?", they either hang up or demand $10,000 for wasting his time (true story). Or I ask them to confirm the last four of my card (which doesn't exist) and they either squirm and say they legally can't, or squirm and say they can only confirm the first four digits. Again, hanging up when I tell them that's a swing and a miss when they give me an AmEx card number.
 
2018-09-13 01:45:21 PM  

Petroleum Oligarch: T.rex: I have a guy in my email who is telling me my phone has malware and that he's gonna release that secret video recording unless i pay him in Bitcoin.     I've been stringing him along for far too long.  literally about 15 back and forth messages.

/I hope he doesn't really have any video recording because he seems mad right now.

I too have seen this episode of Black Mirror. Hope you're the driver so you don't have to fight to the death.


Lol... yes...i did think of that episode.  Yeah,... i'd be the older gentleman in that story, (not the kid).
 
2018-09-13 01:46:15 PM  
I'm getting 2-3 a day.
One in a heavy accent  identified themselves as "the local constabulary "

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-09-13 01:47:44 PM  
Your options:

1. He must be telling the truth, he's the Sheriff. (Trust, Good Faith)

2. She must be as crooked as a dog's hind-leg--She's the Sheriff, a duly-appointed or elected official. I'd better not risk it. (Cynicism)

3. I don't remember what I did but then I usually don't. I'd best cooperate with the "deal" I am being offered. (Fear, Doubt, Uncertainty)

4. I'd better Google this scam. It sounds really shifty, like that Tax Guy who uses a fake voice and speed-dialing to ask for $9,000 right now, paid by giving him by banking or credit card information. (Skeptiicsm, rationallity)
 
2018-09-13 01:52:49 PM  
Id like to see the irs actually try to go after someone and they to produce hudreds of the voicemails and emails that are scams as a defense and get away with it because the irs isnt even trying to shut the scammers down.
 
2018-09-13 01:53:16 PM  
Hint: Government's and professional or corporate persons always communicate in writing, with a lot of ass-covering legalese, facts, bureaucratese, and mumbo-jumbo. They know their reputation and they always give you a name, advance notice of the memo they sent you and which will arrve after the due by date.

You are luck if you get a call-back to your call, but mostly you will get a series of letters by snail mail.

They will never use a fake mechanical automated voice. They like to do the dirty work in person, for that personal touch that taxpayers and customers love.

Someday all this stuff will be done by AI but they will be talking to your AI, probably, because official business is too important to leave to dumb humans with wonky evolved brains.
 
2018-09-13 01:54:31 PM  
My main question every time I hear about one of these scams is, "Who the fark answers their phone?"
 
2018-09-13 01:55:34 PM  
They got services you can sign up for like Jolly Roger Telephone Company where you can use a set of chatty bots or make your own to waste the solicitor's time.

https://jollyrogertelephone.com/
 
2018-09-13 01:58:23 PM  

JoeCowboy: Scam du jour is the "we've become aware of some malicious activity on your computer". I sat and listened to his spiel and when he asked me if I was at my computer I said yeah, I'm watching porn, hey, what are you wearing? I've never had anyone hang up on me so fast.

JC


Yeah, I've had a few of those.

They're trying to get you to let them remotely access your computer so they can steal various personal info on there.

I got one a couple of years ago.  It was from "Adam from the Windows Corporation" (very heavy Indian accent).

He said that Windows had detected a virus on my computer and that unless I followed their instructions then my computer would crash within an hour or two and I'd lose everything.

I figured I'd waste his time.

I made sure to make him repeat himself, and speak up, a lot.  I would reply to his statements but start to ramble back to him about one thing or the other.

I told him I'd have to go turn on my computer first. . .I went to an old disused laptop that I hadn't touched in years.  It didn't have the logon info for my current wifi router, so it was firmly offline.

I kept going on and on with him.  He was trying to let me remote in to my computer, he was getting frustrated that he just couldn't see or perceive my computer on the network.

I'd wasted a good solid hour of his time when I mentioned "Oh, by the way, our internet here is down, was a bad storm yesterday, haven't had internet since then.  I mean, I wouldn't want you to be able to scam me so I've been wasting your time for 63 minutes now so you couldn't scam anyone in that time. "

He got out a couple of stammered profanities before hanging up.
 
2018-09-13 02:01:20 PM  

aseras: Id like to see the irs actually try to go after someone and they to produce hudreds of the voicemails and emails that are scams as a defense and get away with it because the irs isnt even trying to shut the scammers down.


The IRS does not have the money or time to deal with stupid citizens. They only audit the rich and people who can take their money under the table, like professionals, business people, and waiters or criminals.

If you make less than, say, $100,000 a year, your income is chump change. I bet you don't even make political donations. You probably have never even bought one vote ($300) let alone enough votes that the candidate has seen your name on the list or real voters who matter ($10,000).

As I have observed before (thanks, Jim Hightower), 96% of Americans do not donate a cent. 4% donate but mostly under $200. I estimate the price of one vote to be $300 because that is the chump change they offer the chumps for their votes (see Richard M. Nixon's Head, or the "$300 dollar Bill" for details).

You are on your own unless you are "rich".

I thin the 20/80 rule applies. 20% of the people have 80% of the wealth and income. Of course, that is just the real middle classes. They don't count much either unless they make large political donations or work their asses off on political campaigns. Then they are worth a coffee, maybe even a cake, but the cake will be a lie, like Donald Trump's copy or replica of Obama's styrofoam cake.

The real cake was in the shape of a bust of Donald Trump's head and shoulders (which is what a bust is, unless you are talking about policies, actions and legislation)
 
2018-09-13 02:01:48 PM  

brantgoose: Your options:


0) Sign up for https://www.nomorobo.com/ which will block 99% of these calls.

T-Mobile has something similar built in for free - these kinds of calls show a caller ID of "Scam Likely".
 
2018-09-13 02:02:44 PM  

omg bbq: I'm getting 2-3 a day.
One in a heavy accent  identified themselves as "the local constabulary "

[img.fark.net image 425x441]


I just called the # (I'm at work) and a woman answered "Hello?". I asked "are you the one?". She said "the one what?"  I said "the one Fark warned me about". She hung up.
 
2018-09-13 02:04:15 PM  

Silverstaff: I got one a couple of years ago. It was from "Adam from the Windows Corporation" (very heavy Indian accent).


He called me a few years ago. It took a few minutes to convince him that I didn't own any computers running Windows.
 
2018-09-13 02:06:00 PM  

omg bbq: I'm getting 2-3 a day.
One in a heavy accent  identified themselves as "the local constabulary "

[img.fark.net image 425x441]


Don't worry, I just called them on your behalf.

Your welcome!
 
2018-09-13 02:06:14 PM  

Driedsponge: I got a voicemail the other day from someone with a heavy accent claiming that there is a legal action being filed against me and my physical address, and I'm currently under federal investigation.  Unless I call the number back immediately, they would be forced to continue the legal action.

No name, no department, nothing, just a phone number.  I had to admire the determination of the scammer.


I had a call like that on my office phone. Asking for [horribly mangled Spanish name], as they were investigating an unspecified something. I said no such person worked here. They asked how long I had the number. I said I was unsure, but it must be a long time because this is a government number. They quickly hung up.
 
2018-09-13 02:06:16 PM  

Satan's Bunny Slippers: If anyone* actually falls for this, you probably deserve to lose your money.


Satan's Bunny Slippers: It's like they don't even try anymore.


They are targeting

1. Stupid people
2. Senile people

So yes, they don't try. A smart person is likely to see through whatever scam BS they try because at the root, there are some simple truths that they can't get around. But the dumb, the senile, etc, will fall for BS that doesn't pass these simple checks.

For example...

The IRS is a government entity, they are not going to call someone out of the blue ... they will send you a letter, and you will need to call them and sit on hold for at least an hour before you get to speak to an actual human. And then, you have to send them back a letter. The government loves paperwork.
 
2018-09-13 02:06:16 PM  

sunderland56: Silverstaff: I got one a couple of years ago. It was from "Adam from the Windows Corporation" (very heavy Indian accent).

He called me a few years ago. It took a few minutes to convince him that I didn't own any computers running Windows.


I heard about a VM you could set up that farks with their systems.  You give them the IP for the VM and it's set up to infect them when they remote into it.

I should see if that's still around.  We get that call quite often.
 
2018-09-13 02:08:01 PM  
Another reason why the IRS don't care: almost all of your income is recorded on computers. They could eliminate you from the process all together, but that would cost more money than having you do the stupid paperwork wrong. They have what we in Canada call T4 or T5 slips for nearly everybody.

In Canada, there are only about 5 million taxpaeyrs. The other two thirds of the tax-filers are applying for a government cheque or a refund of over-paid taxes.

They have the money. They have the numbers. I wish to Hell they would do the damn math themselves and send me a notice if there is anything due or refunded by direct deposit. They would save a fortune on health care if we didn't have to go through our own taxes.

Every year it is the same damn story: slow careful filling out of forms. Getting a wrong result where I owe them money. Correcting the result to them owing me money. Them cutting the amount of money they owe me by half. It's getting harder and harder for me to care because I am too poor to audit and too poor to care.

Also, I always make that damn mistake somewhere, so I don't trust me as much as I trust the Goobers at the Mint. I know the Goobers are stealing gold and silver. They are also dumping a few million dollars into the Ottawa River, but they do dredge it up once in a while and recuperate it.
 
2018-09-13 02:10:04 PM  

sunderland56: brantgoose: Your options:

0) Sign up for https://www.nomorobo.com/ which will block 99% of these calls.

T-Mobile has something similar built in for free - these kinds of calls show a caller ID of "Scam Likely".


Thanks. Not an option in Canada probably, they usually aren't. Also, the companies not only tend to ignore these lists. They actually steal them and use them to call people who have declared publically they don't want to be called. But some good comes of it, all the same, so thanks on behalf of the lucky few. Some companies are honest. The scammers almost never are.
 
2018-09-13 02:10:21 PM  
Oh!  Mom got one of those where they call and pretend to be your grandchild or neice or nephew or something, claiming they're in jail or some such nonsense and can't call mom and dad and need you to wire them money.

"Hi...It's me, your niece Suzy."  (Narrator:   Diogenes' mother has no nieces, only nephews.)

Mom, true to form, plays along.  Sort of.  "Um...hi.  But I don't have a niece named 'Suzy.'"

"Oh, OK.  Then how about Melanie?"

I think it was Suzy/Melanie's first day.
 
2018-09-13 02:11:10 PM  

Driedsponge: I got a voicemail the other day from someone with a heavy accent claiming that there is a legal action being filed against me and my physical address, and I'm currently under federal investigation.  Unless I call the number back immediately, they would be forced to continue the legal action.

No name, no department, nothing, just a phone number.  I had to admire the determination of the scammer.


Several years ago I got a VM from some robocall instructing me to call some 800 number.  For whatever reason, I looked up the number and found it was, in fact, an IRS number and I did have an actual tax issue.  As I recall, the VM started mid-sentence so maybe it said "This is the IRS" but it wasn't on the VM.
 
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