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(Gizmodo)   The feud between Oreo and Hydrox is again heating up thanks to a supposed series of "hidden cookies"   ( gizmodo.com) divider line
    More: Facepalm, Grocery store, oreo, Safeway Inc., Biscuit, SuperValu, Cookie, Hydrox, Supermarket  
•       •       •

1895 clicks; posted to Geek » on 09 Aug 2018 at 5:05 PM (11 days ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



60 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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2018-08-09 03:29:29 PM  
It's not a feud.  Oreos are delicious cookies whereas Hydrox are tasteless vegan imitations.
 
2018-08-09 03:42:03 PM  
Hail Hydrox!
 
2018-08-09 03:42:18 PM  
The feud is whether 'Hydrox' or 'Mondelez' picked the worst brand name.
 
2018-08-09 03:42:30 PM  
Is "hidden cookie" a euphemism for prostitutes?
 
2018-08-09 03:52:20 PM  

NewportBarGuy: Is "hidden cookie" a euphemism for prostitutes?


img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-08-09 03:52:40 PM  
This is the Oreo section at my local Safeway--21 varieties, and that's not counting the two on an endcap.

img.fark.netView Full Size


1. Golden Double Stuf
2. Mint
3. Thins Mint
4. Thins
5. Thins Chocolate
6. Thins Lemon
7. Thins Golden
8. Birthday Cake Golden
9. Reduced Fat
10. Peanut Butter
11. Chocolate
12. Birthday Cake
13. Mega Stuf
14. Mega Stuf Golden
15. Heads or Tails
16. Triple Double
17. Red Velvet
18. Cinnamon Bun
19. Double Stuf
20. Golden
21. Regular Old Oreos

It's out of control. We buy every new variety and test them on one of our devs. He'll eat anything.
 
2018-08-09 04:04:54 PM  
Bah, neither one is as good as a Fig Newton.
 
2018-08-09 04:09:59 PM  
A lesson in unfettered capitalism: want to break (back) into the market? Tough shiat - we'll strongarm distributors to hide or not carry your product. Think they'll give your sorry ass a break versus a dominant market mainstay?
 
2018-08-09 04:19:10 PM  
Cookie on cookie crime is the worst!
 
2018-08-09 05:15:42 PM  

Dallymo: This is the Oreo section at my local Safeway--21 varieties, and that's not counting the two on an endcap.

[img.fark.net image 425x566]

1. Golden Double Stuf
2. Mint
3. Thins Mint
4. Thins
5. Thins Chocolate
6. Thins Lemon
7. Thins Golden
8. Birthday Cake Golden
9. Reduced Fat
10. Peanut Butter
11. Chocolate
12. Birthday Cake
13. Mega Stuf
14. Mega Stuf Golden
15. Heads or Tails
16. Triple Double
17. Red Velvet
18. Cinnamon Bun
19. Double Stuf
20. Golden
21. Regular Old Oreos

It's out of control. We buy every new variety and test them on one of our devs. He'll eat anything.


I hope his name is Mike.
 
2018-08-09 05:16:14 PM  
Call me the oddball, but I only eat the cookie. My daughter would eat all that cream garbage off. then I'll eat the cookies left
 
2018-08-09 05:16:21 PM  

farkyorefeelings: Dallymo: This is the Oreo section at my local Safeway--21 varieties, and that's not counting the two on an endcap.

[img.fark.net image 425x566]

1. Golden Double Stuf
2. Mint
3. Thins Mint
4. Thins
5. Thins Chocolate
6. Thins Lemon
7. Thins Golden
8. Birthday Cake Golden
9. Reduced Fat
10. Peanut Butter
11. Chocolate
12. Birthday Cake
13. Mega Stuf
14. Mega Stuf Golden
15. Heads or Tails
16. Triple Double
17. Red Velvet
18. Cinnamon Bun
19. Double Stuf
20. Golden
21. Regular Old Oreos

It's out of control. We buy every new variety and test them on one of our devs. He'll eat anything.

I hope his name is Mike.


Mikey.

/fark you phone!
 
2018-08-09 05:17:18 PM  
Hydrox just has a lousy name. It sounds like industrial metal cleaner.

"Spray some hydrox on those rust stains, let 'em sit for twenty and then we'll hit 'em with the rotary. And make sure you're wearing goggles and a respirator, that stuff's got some nasty fumes."
 
2018-08-09 05:18:15 PM  
So, they are getting their cookies tossed, eh?
 
2018-08-09 05:22:17 PM  

Dallymo: This is the Oreo section at my local Safeway--21 varieties, and that's not counting the two on an endcap.

[img.fark.net image 425x566]

1. Golden Double Stuf
2. Mint
3. Thins Mint
4. Thins
5. Thins Chocolate
6. Thins Lemon
7. Thins Golden
8. Birthday Cake Golden
9. Reduced Fat
10. Peanut Butter
11. Chocolate
12. Birthday Cake
13. Mega Stuf
14. Mega Stuf Golden
15. Heads or Tails
16. Triple Double
17. Red Velvet
18. Cinnamon Bun
19. Double Stuf
20. Golden
21. Regular Old Oreos

It's out of control. We buy every new variety and test them on one of our devs. He'll eat anything.


In a month you'll be able to add Pumpkin Spice to the list
 
2018-08-09 05:29:50 PM  

Dallymo: This is the Oreo section at my local Safeway--21 varieties, and that's not counting the two on an endcap.

[img.fark.net image 425x566]

1. Golden Double Stuf
2. Mint
3. Thins Mint
4. Thins
5. Thins Chocolate
6. Thins Lemon
7. Thins Golden
8. Birthday Cake Golden
9. Reduced Fat
10. Peanut Butter
11. Chocolate
12. Birthday Cake
13. Mega Stuf
14. Mega Stuf Golden
15. Heads or Tails
16. Triple Double
17. Red Velvet
18. Cinnamon Bun
19. Double Stuf
20. Golden
21. Regular Old Oreos

It's out of control. We buy every new variety and test them on one of our devs. He'll eat anything.


Ever seen the spaghetti sauce aisle? This is nothing new; it is something that works.
 
2018-08-09 05:35:49 PM  

Ivo Shandor: The feud is whether 'Hydrox' or 'Mondelez' picked the worst brand name.


img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-08-09 05:35:58 PM  

Vacation Bible School: Dallymo: This is the Oreo section at my local Safeway--21 varieties, and that's not counting the two on an endcap.

[img.fark.net image 425x566]

1. Golden Double Stuf
2. Mint
3. Thins Mint
4. Thins
5. Thins Chocolate
6. Thins Lemon
7. Thins Golden
8. Birthday Cake Golden
9. Reduced Fat
10. Peanut Butter
11. Chocolate
12. Birthday Cake
13. Mega Stuf
14. Mega Stuf Golden
15. Heads or Tails
16. Triple Double
17. Red Velvet
18. Cinnamon Bun
19. Double Stuf
20. Golden
21. Regular Old Oreos

It's out of control. We buy every new variety and test them on one of our devs. He'll eat anything.

In a month you'll be able to add Pumpkin Spice to the list


img.fark.netView Full Size


This week's abortion was Rocky Road Trip. Mikey (not his real name) gave them a B- and then changed to a C, then back to a B-. I think he needs professional help; these are very nasty, indeed. WTF are "soy nut inclusions" and did they have to give the filling a texture that is half that paste they use to polish your teeth at the dentist and half apricot pit exfoliating facial scrub? And weird-sweet, not good-sweet. Fortunately, the filling is greasily rubbery enough to peel off in one piece so you can eat the chocolate cookies (always, as the package says, made with REAL COCOA).

Weird. One of the sys admins just said these are the best limited edition Oreos yet.

Someone should check the ventilation in this building. I think that part of the department is not getting enough fresh air.
 
2018-08-09 05:39:13 PM  

Im_Gumby: It's not a feud.  Oreos are delicious cookies whereas Hydrox are tasteless vegan imitations.


Aren't oreos vegan too?

/never had a hydrox, but that's a seriously terrible name
//delicious chocolate weight loss cleaning product mmmm
 
2018-08-09 05:51:29 PM  
Oreos are horrid. The biscuit part looks like it should be intensely chocolatey but it tastes like cardboard. The sugared lard inside is, well, sugared lard. Maybe it's vegetable oil. I can't tell. Either way they're awful. I do not understand the popularity at all.
 
2018-08-09 05:57:05 PM  

bloobeary: Hydrox just has a lousy name. It sounds like industrial metal cleaner.

"Spray some hydrox on those rust stains, let 'em sit for twenty and then we'll hit 'em with the rotary. And make sure you're wearing goggles and a respirator, that stuff's got some nasty fumes."



How can you say that? It's a portmanteau of two delicious things, animal hide, and rocks....

On second thought, give me that industrial metal cleaner.
 
2018-08-09 06:05:17 PM  
Regular, and rarely sometimes double stuff. Mrs mole tries out some of thatother because they're "fun" but blea afaiconcerned
 
2018-08-09 06:08:27 PM  

LoneWolf343: Dallymo: This is the Oreo section at my local Safeway--21 varieties, and that's not counting the two on an endcap.

[img.fark.net image 425x566]

1. Golden Double Stuf
2. Mint
3. Thins Mint
4. Thins
5. Thins Chocolate
6. Thins Lemon
7. Thins Golden
8. Birthday Cake Golden
9. Reduced Fat
10. Peanut Butter
11. Chocolate
12. Birthday Cake
13. Mega Stuf
14. Mega Stuf Golden
15. Heads or Tails
16. Triple Double
17. Red Velvet
18. Cinnamon Bun
19. Double Stuf
20. Golden
21. Regular Old Oreos

It's out of control. We buy every new variety and test them on one of our devs. He'll eat anything.

Ever seen the spaghetti sauce aisle? This is nothing new; it is something that works.


Yeah, well I don't see 23 varieties from a single brand name in the pasta sauce section.
 
2018-08-09 06:15:57 PM  
I don't mean to be a cookiest, but Vanilla Oreos > Chocolate Oreos
 
2018-08-09 06:22:49 PM  

NewportBarGuy: I don't see 23 varieties from a single brand name in the pasta sauce section.


I don't feel like doing the sleuthing, but I would be willing to wager the vast majority of the "brands" on the shelf are produced by the same company, at least for the nationally-distributed options....
 
2018-08-09 06:24:48 PM  

Im_Gumby: It's not a feud.  Oreos are delicious cookies whereas Hydrox are tasteless vegan imitations.


DYRTFA? The very first sentence says you're wrong.
 
2018-08-09 06:25:12 PM  

Dallymo: This is the Oreo section at my local Safeway--21 varieties, and that's not counting the two on an endcap.

[img.fark.net image 425x566]

1. Golden Double Stuf
2. Mint
3. Thins Mint
4. Thins
5. Thins Chocolate
6. Thins Lemon
7. Thins Golden
8. Birthday Cake Golden
9. Reduced Fat
10. Peanut Butter
11. Chocolate
12. Birthday Cake
13. Mega Stuf
14. Mega Stuf Golden
15. Heads or Tails
16. Triple Double
17. Red Velvet
18. Cinnamon Bun
19. Double Stuf
20. Golden
21. Regular Old Oreos

It's out of control. We buy every new variety and test them on one of our devs. He'll eat anything.


That's the big problem around my neck of the woods too. Giant amounts of real estate given to Oreo, and I'll be damned if I can find two stores in the county that have one single shelf spot open for Hadrox.
 
2018-08-09 06:25:14 PM  
I really want the lemon Oreos to be available with the chocolate cookies instead of the vanilla ones.
 
2018-08-09 06:27:40 PM  

Gordon Bennett: Oreos are horrid. The biscuit part looks like it should be intensely chocolatey but it tastes like cardboard. The sugared lard inside is, well, sugared lard. Maybe it's vegetable oil. I can't tell. Either way they're awful. I do not understand the popularity at all.


You just said "sugared lard" and you don't understand why they're popular?

I don't get why Fireball is a popular drink. It's just whiskey that tastes like candy! It makes no sense!

I don't get why anal sex is so popular. It's just tighter and has the potential to give both parties intense orgasms.

I don't get why marijuana edibles are so popular. They're only delicious and get you a lot higher than smoking.

Hell, I bet Oreo probably means "sugared lard" in latin or something
 
2018-08-09 06:28:59 PM  
I found the Oreo coconut this to be surprisingly good. Mostly I hate Oreos. Those were good, though. I say that most begrudgingly, because generally I find Oreos to be a stain on humanity.
 
2018-08-09 06:37:59 PM  
Regular, Double Stuf or Thins, I don't waste time or money on different flavors. Might try Mega but that just seems excessive. Hydrox is a lesser cookie.
 
2018-08-09 06:48:59 PM  

Lee Jackson Beauregard: Im_Gumby: It's not a feud.  Oreos are delicious cookies whereas Hydrox are tasteless vegan imitations.

DYRTFA? The very first sentence says you're wrong.


Of course not!

This is FARK!
 
2018-08-09 06:52:34 PM  

SFSailor: NewportBarGuy: I don't see 23 varieties from a single brand name in the pasta sauce section.

I don't feel like doing the sleuthing, but I would be willing to wager the vast majority of the "brands" on the shelf are produced by the same company, at least for the nationally-distributed options....


I'm with you on that. That's why I focused on a single brand.
 
2018-08-09 07:13:58 PM  
Mmmm, ashes-flavored cookies with gritty lard sugar.
 
2018-08-09 07:31:49 PM  

bloobeary: Hydrox just has a lousy name. It sounds like industrial metal cleaner.

"Spray some hydrox on those rust stains, let 'em sit for twenty and then we'll hit 'em with the rotary. And make sure you're wearing goggles and a respirator, that stuff's got some nasty fumes."


Can't smart enough.

I prefer Industrial Carpet Cleaner, though.
 
2018-08-09 07:53:39 PM  

Im_Gumby: It's not a feud.  Oreos are delicious cookies whereas Hydrox are tasteless vegan imitations.


Oreos are vegan as well.  When you eat Oreos you're eating evil scary VEGAN FOOD!!! BOOGA BOOGA!!!!
 
2018-08-09 07:56:35 PM  

Ivo Shandor: The feud is whether 'Hydrox' or 'Mondelez' picked the worst brand name.


Monde D'Lez is the name of my gender-swapped Pansy Division cover band.
 
2018-08-09 08:23:03 PM  
Get high, then either one will do.

/ Need some Zep to accompany your munchies.
 
2018-08-09 08:38:54 PM  
I am a merchandiser. I have had brushes with Mondelez. They do, indeed, stoop to some dirty tricks when they get the chance, and they have on occasion made me have to do extra work to undo the crap they've done.

However, that's par for the course with the big companies. Hershey/Reese's does it a lot. Mars does it a lot. In merchandising, of course, the point is to promote your clients' products. I serve a wide array of clients, in all categories, and I can say without hesitation that the worst competition and the most underhanded tactics occur in the grocery aisles, especially in the snacks, beer, and candy. Tobacco companies do a lot of shifty stuff, too, but their product is usually behind a counter so they don't have as much opportunity to just hide competition's products without being noticed by store personnel.

I've also watched reps from the big companies swoop in behind me after I've spent time setting up a display and placing promotional items, and dismantle my work entirely. I once put up a television display for Samsung (years ago. I am no longer affiliated with them), and stuck around after I was done with the job (which took several hours) to do some of my own shopping, and watched as a Sony rep showed up to do his own thing, saw the new display, and reached behind the TV and receiver and pulled out all the cables, then took out the flash drive that ran the demo loop and dropped it down a hole in the back of the display. Straight-up vandalism.

And of course, Sony can easily say that the representative wasn't following orders and doesn't represent Sony's policy regarding competitor displays. And maybe that's the truth. Maybe this guy was a maverick asshole who just felt some insane loyalty to Sony to the point of vandalizing competitor displays, but corporate culture being what it is, I wouldn't doubt there was a nudge or hint or suggestion for just such behavior in off-the-record conference calls or meetings between A-type supervisors and their reps.

As a merchandiser, I always see my job as promoting my clients' products or services by presenting them in the most positive light possible, and I refuse to do sneaky crap. My company doesn't sink to that level, but that's the benefit of being with a big third-party and not being a first-party rep. The first-party reps are working directly for their client, getting a paycheck from them, and as such there's something that compels them to be more aggressive in whatever way necessary to make their company "win" in the marketplace.

Personally, I have no emotions one way or another about any client I serve. It's the only way I can represent two different candy companies, four different appliance makers, two different apparel companies, two tech companies, several pharmaceutical companies, several food producers, and a plethora of other clients without a conflict of interest. I may have my personal preferences, but I do not let my interests or lack thereof impact the quality of work I do for any of my clients. When I'm working I'm a professional serving as the public face for any one of my clients, and I wouldn't want to be caught doing dirty deeds while I represent them. It reflects poorly on them, and worse, it reflects poorly on me.

So to those reps working for Mondelez, I just have to say: Don't be stupid. This will not be a good plan for you or your company/client in the long run. It hurts your reputation and harms public perception. There IS such a thing as bad publicity, despite the cliche. Act like a goddamn professional, not like a ruthless high school football parent trying to make sure your kid's team wins.

And if the folks who make Hydrox want some decent merchandising folks to counter these dirty tricks, please consider looking at the reputations of the top merchandising companies and pick the one that best suits your needs, because there are plenty of us out there who would be happy to pick up an underdog client and see that they get a fair shake in the marketplace. A good merchandiser can make a huge difference for a smaller company, and can be well worth the expense when you're facing these giant corporations that have thousands of their own reps (some with questionable ethics) in the field.

That said, I do like me some Hydrox. I won't lie, though, I like me some Oreos, too. But the shelf space taken up by Oreos is just insane, and I'm kind of hoping Hydrox can carve out more of it for themselves in the face of Mondelez's allegedly unethically territorial tactics.
 
2018-08-09 08:44:05 PM  

doglover: Hell, I bet Oreo probably means "sugared lard" in latin or something


It's just what people in the Bronx call this bird:

birdsandblooms.comView Full Size
 
2018-08-09 09:04:45 PM  
This whole thing is silly. Trader Joe's Joe-Joe's are vastly superior to both. The cookies taste like chocolate, and the cream tastes like something other barely sweetened Crisco.

And their peppermint Joe-Joe's at Xmas time are amazing.
 
2018-08-09 09:52:25 PM  
Hydrox are the Miracle Whhhip of the sandwich cookie world.
 
2018-08-09 10:13:31 PM  

Dallymo: This is the Oreo section at my local Safeway--21 varieties, and that's not counting the two on an endcap.

[img.fark.net image 425x566]



Riiiight.

Because people actually believe that there are really 21 varieties of the same cookie, and that most of them are totally not blockers just taking up all the shelf space.
 
2018-08-09 10:17:11 PM  

Mangonel: This whole thing is silly. Trader Joe's Joe-Joe's are vastly superior to both. The cookies taste like chocolate, and the cream tastes like something other barely sweetened Crisco.

And their peppermint Joe-Joe's at Xmas time are amazing.


And they clean your teeth and freshen your breath!
 
2018-08-09 10:18:49 PM  
As an aside, if you've ever worked at a supermarket, direct store distribution (that really should be "direct store delivery", or DSD) sucks. It was touted as a way to save retailers money, by not having to ship stock from the retailer's distribution center to the retailer's stores and allow the producer to provide more frequent restocking & responsive trade promotions, but what it's really done is allowed the producers to claim shelf real estate that the retailer no longer controls.
 
2018-08-09 10:27:55 PM  

elvisaintdead: Hydrox are the Miracle Whhhip of the sandwich cookie world.


I much prefer Miracle Whip to mayo.
 
d3
2018-08-09 10:59:43 PM  
Hey Hydrox,

Maybe try advertising your cookies. I've grown up with Oreo ads and jingles about "that kid with the Oreo cookie". I have never once seen an ad for Hydrox.
 
2018-08-09 11:06:20 PM  

d3: Hey Hydrox,

Maybe try advertising your cookies. I've grown up with Oreo ads and jingles about "that kid with the Oreo cookie". I have never once seen an ad for Hydrox.


Part of the issue with that is that the brand has changed ownership half a dozen times over the past few decades.
 
2018-08-09 11:29:48 PM  
Hail Hydrox!
 
2018-08-10 12:35:47 AM  

JerseyTim: Hail Hydrox!


The one and only time I get on board with that meme.
 
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