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(Twitter)   Let's check in to see what Al Qaeda says about today   ( twitter.com) divider line
    More: Satire, Malay language, Tweet, Indonesian language, Copy link, Like, Twitter, Vladimir Putin, Vodafone  
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3629 clicks; posted to Politics » on 16 Jul 2018 at 7:28 PM (4 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



56 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


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2018-07-16 02:12:05 PM  
Original Tweet:

 
2018-07-16 02:27:15 PM  
This is a good one.
 
2018-07-16 02:52:11 PM  
Qhite brilliant.
I'm sorry, I mean "Waaahhh, waaahhh! Too soon."
 
2018-07-16 03:03:20 PM  

Original: Original Tweet:


img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-07-16 03:25:22 PM  
Yep, that's some funny right there.
 
2018-07-16 04:31:34 PM  

xanadian: Original: Original Tweet:

[img.fark.net image 750x600]


Yeah right. Candle flames can't melt Twinkies. Actually, can anything melt Twinkies? Do Twinkies even get digested or do they come out the other side either chewed, like gum, or whole again, like corn?
 
2018-07-16 06:28:58 PM  
So they admit it!
 
2018-07-16 06:57:29 PM  
If I'll be your bodyguard, would you be my long lost pal?
 
2018-07-16 07:18:03 PM  

luckyeddie: Qhite brilliant.
I'm sorry, I mean "Waaahhh, waaahhh! Too soon."


Hey, Eddie, we're calling that "womp womp" these days. Get with the program, man.
 
2018-07-16 07:22:28 PM  
A punch line for Al Qaeda? Boy, Donnie is sure making America respected again, isn't he?
 
2018-07-16 07:30:06 PM  
The summation of today's events:

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-07-16 07:36:37 PM  

joen00b: The summation of today's events:

[img.fark.net image 780x520]


...and the most accurate.
 
2018-07-16 07:36:42 PM  

Original: Original Tweet:

alqaeda: Inspired by President Putin's generous offer to assist with the investigation into Russian election meddling, I would just like to say that Al-Qaeda would be happy to help with any aviation security issues that you may be having. Really, it's no trouble at all.


Words escape me.
 
2018-07-16 07:37:23 PM  

joen00b: The summation of today's events:

[img.fark.net image 780x520]


"How long do I have to wear this bloody underwear?"
"I guess we're engaged.  Mister Donald Putin.  Mister Donald J. Putin.  Mister D J Putin"
 
2018-07-16 07:37:35 PM  

DeaH: A punch line for Al Qaeda? Boy, Donnie is sure making America respected again, isn't he?


At least he'll never apologize.
 
2018-07-16 07:39:51 PM  
scontent-mia3-1.xx.fbcdn.netView Full Size
 
2018-07-16 07:41:21 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-07-16 07:42:55 PM  
That's awful nice of Al Qaeda. He must be a really nice guy.....
 
2018-07-16 07:45:36 PM  

joen00b: The summation of today's events:

[img.fark.net image 780x520]


images.dailykos.comView Full Size
 
2018-07-16 07:46:18 PM  

TheDarkSaintOfGin: DeaH: A punch line for Al Qaeda? Boy, Donnie is sure making America respected again, isn't he?

At least he'll never apologize.


You think he hasn't already apologized to Putin for the Mueller investigation and the congressional sanctions?
 
2018-07-16 07:48:39 PM  
I'm no expert, but I think that account is fake. I wouldn't trust it if I were you, it's probably an FBI trap. Man these liberals are getting desperate.
 
2018-07-16 07:50:42 PM  

Bslim: joen00b: The summation of today's events:

[img.fark.net image 780x520]

[images.dailykos.com image 550x553]


I am actually surprised more Tom of Finland , um, art, has not been made for this summit.
Then again, I am sure it has
 
2018-07-16 07:52:56 PM  
That is some funny ass shiat.

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-07-16 07:59:54 PM  
MY FIRST GREENLIGHT!  BOW TO YOUR NEW GOD!

LET THERE BE A FEAST, BRING THE FINEST MEATS AND CHEESES IN ALL THE LANDS!
 
151
2018-07-16 08:00:06 PM  

joen00b: The summation of today's events:

[img.fark.net image 780x520]


Comment of the week. Month possibly. Well done.
 
2018-07-16 08:05:00 PM  

DeaH: TheDarkSaintOfGin: DeaH: A punch line for Al Qaeda? Boy, Donnie is sure making America respected again, isn't he?

At least he'll never apologize.

You think he hasn't already apologized to Putin for the Mueller investigation and the congressional sanctions?


President Donald Trump on Friday told U.S. Naval Academy graduates that America has become "a lot" stronger recently and that "we are not going to apologize for America."
"And we are respected again," Trump said in a speech to graduates and their families gathered in Annapolis, Maryland. "I can tell you that. We are respected again."
 
2018-07-16 08:07:01 PM  

iago: MY FIRST GREENLIGHT!  BOW TO YOUR NEW GOD!

LET THERE BE A FEAST, BRING THE FINEST MEATS AND CHEESES IN ALL THE LANDS!


Are muffins and bagels alright while  we drink from the keg of glory?
 
2018-07-16 08:07:27 PM  

iago: MY FIRST GREENLIGHT!  BOW TO YOUR NEW GOD!

LET THERE BE A FEAST, BRING THE FINEST MEATS AND CHEESES IN ALL THE LANDS!


Add wenches and I'll book the flight!
 
2018-07-16 08:09:33 PM  

koder: xanadian: Original: Original Tweet:

[img.fark.net image 750x600]

Yeah right. Candle flames can't melt Twinkies. Actually, can anything melt Twinkies? Do Twinkies even get digested or do they come out the other side either chewed, like gum, or whole again, like corn?


i do some experiments with my grade 9 students to try to destroy twinkies. Dipping them in ethanol and lighting them on fire only chars the outside. Even taping them to a balloon filled with hydrogen and oxygen and exploding it only produces an undamaged flying Twinkie that one student inevitably volunteers to eat.
 
2018-07-16 08:21:56 PM  
Holy f*cking sh*t, people who use Twitter are retarded.

/apologies to retarded people
 
2018-07-16 08:23:38 PM  

iago: MY FIRST GREENLIGHT!  BOW TO YOUR NEW GOD!
LET THERE BE A FEAST, BRING THE FINEST MEATS AND CHEESES IN ALL THE LANDS!


So. You monitor Al Qaeda's twitter account. Mmm hmmph.
 
2018-07-16 08:26:14 PM  
pbs.twimg.comView Full Size
 
2018-07-16 08:27:08 PM  

iago: MY FIRST GREENLIGHT!  BOW TO YOUR NEW GOD!

LET THERE BE A FEAST, BRING THE FINEST MEATS AND CHEESES IN ALL THE LANDS!


I'll bring you some socks, you'll need socks m'lord
 
2018-07-16 08:33:27 PM  
Man, when even Al Qaeda is mocking you, you really did have a bad day.
 
2018-07-16 08:35:44 PM  

Someothermonkey: [pbs.twimg.com image 617x617]


Fake news.  _That_ traitorous POS stopped looking once he checked under the couch - he never would have bothered talking to him, even if he had the opportunity handed to him.
 
2018-07-16 08:42:00 PM  

iago: MY FIRST GREENLIGHT!  BOW TO YOUR NEW GOD!

LET THERE BE A FEAST, BRING THE FINEST MEATS AND CHEESES IN ALL THE LANDS!


As you request the finest casu marzo
img.fark.netView Full Size

Eww


I would have just asked for beer.
 
2018-07-16 08:49:36 PM  
Than

chrismurphy: iago: MY FIRST GREENLIGHT!  BOW TO YOUR NEW GOD!
LET THERE BE A FEAST, BRING THE FINEST MEATS AND CHEESES IN ALL THE LANDS!

So. You monitor Al Qaeda's twitter account. Mmm hmmph.


Myself and 34 thousand other infidels!

And this is no way to talk to your NEW GOD.
 
2018-07-16 09:00:47 PM  

iago: MY FIRST GREENLIGHT!  BOW TO YOUR NEW GOD!

LET THERE BE A FEAST, BRING THE FINEST MEATS AND CHEESES IN ALL THE LANDS!


How about muffins and bagels?
 
2018-07-16 09:15:32 PM  

joen00b: The summation of today's events:

[

img.fark.netView Full Size
]


Shamelessly stolen and reposted.
 
2018-07-16 09:17:57 PM  

iago: MY FIRST GREENLIGHT!  BOW TO YOUR NEW GOD!

LET THERE BE A FEAST, BRING THE FINEST MEATS AND CHEESES IN ALL THE LANDS!


i.kym-cdn.comView Full Size
 
2018-07-16 09:23:42 PM  

germ78: joen00b: The summation of today's events:

[[img.fark.net image 780x520]]

Shamelessly stolen and reposted.


You should really steal one that isn't awkwardly stretched.   The picture is awkward without it.
 
2018-07-16 09:37:28 PM  

Gerald Tarrant: koder: xanadian: Original: Original Tweet:

[img.fark.net image 750x600]

Yeah right. Candle flames can't melt Twinkies. Actually, can anything melt Twinkies? Do Twinkies even get digested or do they come out the other side either chewed, like gum, or whole again, like corn?

i do some experiments with my grade 9 students to try to destroy twinkies. Dipping them in ethanol and lighting them on fire only chars the outside. Even taping them to a balloon filled with hydrogen and oxygen and exploding it only produces an undamaged flying Twinkie that one student inevitably volunteers to eat.


I would have been that student.
 
2018-07-16 09:54:45 PM  
You can almost hear this in Seth McFarlane's voice.

/ btw his space show is pretty good
// the cartoon is okay in small bites, it insists in itself
/// slashes in three !
 
2018-07-16 09:55:19 PM  
Well that is funny I admit.
 
2018-07-16 10:11:41 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
This is parody, right? Even the cat is now starring longingly for a beer.
 
2018-07-16 10:33:19 PM  

iago: MY FIRST GREENLIGHT!  BOW TO YOUR NEW GOD!

LET THERE BE A FEAST, BRING THE FINEST MEATS AND CHEESES IN ALL THE LANDS!


Alright.

Let me see what's down at Safeway.
 
2018-07-16 11:04:57 PM  

iago: MY FIRST GREENLIGHT!  BOW TO YOUR NEW GOD!

LET THERE BE A FEAST, BRING THE FINEST MEATS AND CHEESES IN ALL THE LANDS!


O, beware, my lord, of jealousy; 
It is the green-eyed monster which doth mock...
 
2018-07-16 11:05:53 PM  

Gerald Tarrant: koder: xanadian: Original: Original Tweet:

[img.fark.net image 750x600]

Yeah right. Candle flames can't melt Twinkies. Actually, can anything melt Twinkies? Do Twinkies even get digested or do they come out the other side either chewed, like gum, or whole again, like corn?

i do some experiments with my grade 9 students to try to destroy twinkies. Dipping them in ethanol and lighting them on fire only chars the outside. Even taping them to a balloon filled with hydrogen and oxygen and exploding it only produces an undamaged flying Twinkie that one student inevitably volunteers to eat.


When I was in 9th grade, I think I knew how to use a sledgehammer.
 
2018-07-17 12:18:28 AM  

iago: MY FIRST GREENLIGHT!  BOW TO YOUR NEW GOD!

LET THERE BE A FEAST, BRING THE FINEST MEATS AND CHEESES IN ALL THE LANDS!


Right. Spam and Velveeta it is. It will pair beautifully with a domestic Fresca.
 
2018-07-17 12:25:12 AM  
So, that's a great joke and all, but we ought to remember at this juncture that these are the same people who murdered several thousand Americans and engaged us in two long, bloody wars of attrition - at least one of which is still in progress. As witty as the tweet may be - and it is - I still don't feel much like laughing. What I do feel like is walking up to the SOB who reduced this nation to an international joke, and punching him in the nose.
 
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