Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Talking Points Memo)   Pastor and Trump advisor knows as much about Jesus as you'd expect   ( talkingpointsmemo.com) divider line
    More: Fail, President Donald Trump, Jesus, Islam, evangelical advisory board, Pastor Paula White, child separation policy, child detention center, Christianity  
•       •       •

4585 clicks; posted to Politics » on 11 Jul 2018 at 6:35 PM (6 days ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



156 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Newest | Show all

 
6 days ago  
Have not clicked link, am guessing absolutely nothing..

Brb
 
6 days ago  
Isn't this kinda like the "Han shot first" quarrel ?
They're arguing over fictitious events.
 
6 days ago  

RJReves: Have not clicked link, am guessing absolutely nothing..

Brb


I knew it.
 
6 days ago  
Yeah, that whole crucifixion thing was a real nothingburger.
 
6 days ago  

Driver: Isn't this kinda like the "Han shot first" quarrel ?
They're arguing over fictitious events.


You're not wrong but if you believe in all that hocus pocus shouldn't you follow the instructions the magic dude left?  Seems to me like you should but what do I know?
 
6 days ago  
Pastor and Trump advisor knows as much about Jesus as you'd expect   (

FTFS
 
6 days ago  
Well I suppose outright heresy has pretty much replaced the the US Constitution.
 
6 days ago  
media2.fdncms.comView Full Size


Gee, wonder why Donnie picked her?
 
6 days ago  
"If he had broken the law, then he would have been sinful and he would not have been our Messiah," White added.

What if the law says you must commit a sin? Would refusing to sin be a violation of law and therefore a sin?

/I f*cking hate these evangelicals
 
6 days ago  

fusillade762: [media2.fdncms.com image 720x540]

Gee, wonder why Donnie picked her?


Has Ivanka been dieting?
 
6 days ago  
Biblical Jesus was a law breaking commie, sure, but Republican JesusTM did no such thing.
 
6 days ago  

Driver: Isn't this kinda like the "Han shot first" quarrel ?
They're arguing over fictitious events.


It's still a slightly more interesting bit of theological minutia than we usually get in these "Ha ha, Trump supporters don't know the Bible" threads. There's a fairly standard concept in Christian soteriology which states that Jesus' death was capable of saving everyone because he lived a sinless life. Moreover, both Jesus and Paul taught that Christians should obey the law. (Paul said it was because God put earthly authorities in place.)

However, when Paula White claims Jesus couldn't have been living in Egypt illegally, because that would have been a sin, she's claiming that breaking the law is a sin in and of itself, (and not just "breaking the law without a good reason.") That is a pretty unusual claim to make, even by fundie Christian standards.
 
6 days ago  

fusillade762: [media2.fdncms.com image 720x540]

Gee, wonder why Donnie picked her?


Has Mike Pence seen that picture? I bet that would get him pretty hot and bothered. Does he know his boss is not keeping a respectful distance from that nice Christian lady? She's someone else's wife, for heaven's sake.

More importantly, does her third husband know that Trump is coveting his chattel? I would think there must be some Biblical repercussions for such disrespectful behavior.

Punishments all around! Spankings for ev....hey, Mr. Vice President, where are you going? You'll be in the bathroom for seventeen seconds? OK, you do you. Jesus is watching you masturbate.

/And laughing
 
6 days ago  
 And he entered again into the synagogue, and there was a man there who had a withered hand. [2] And they watched him whether he would heal on the sabbath days; that they might accuse him. [3] And he said to the man who had the withered hand: Stand up in the midst. [4] And he saith to them: Is it lawful to do good on the sabbath days, or to do evil? to save life, or to destroy? But they held their peace. [5] And looking round about on them with anger, being grieved for the blindness of their hearts, he saith to the man: Stretch forth thy hand. And he stretched it forth: and his hand was restored unto him.
[6] And the Pharisees going out, immediately made a consultation with the Herodians against him, how they might destroy him
 
6 days ago  
If you've done nothing wrong you should have nothing to hide from the Romans.
 
6 days ago  
He only needs to know that demagoguery is a very profitable enterprise.
 
6 days ago  
Seriously, did Trump show any signs that he had any religious beliefs at all before he started running for President and needed to sell himself to the Jeebus people?

My guess is he's probably spent most Sunday mornings in his life sleeping off the coke binge he went on on Saturday night.
 
6 days ago  
As far as I can tell, they don't actually worship the Jesus from the Bible (we'll call him Sunday School Jesus) . They worship the things that they can take completely out of context, act superior to and use to bother everyone else (we'll call that concept Asshole Jesus)
 
6 days ago  

Driver: Isn't this kinda like the "Han shot first" quarrel ?
They're arguing over fictitious events.


Well, yeah; except the "fictitious events" have dominated political and social life, legislation, and international relations for two thousand years, so interpretation is kind of critical.

But if you want to think it's irrelevant, you be edgy. Won't change the fact people die for religion every day.
 
6 days ago  
Jesus was literally a fugitive from the law.
 
6 days ago  
When I want to get a better understanding of biblical era Egyptian immigration law, I always turn to hayseed evangelicals.
 
6 days ago  
Pastor and Trump advisor knows as much about Jesus as you'd expect

Not advisor, more like Donnie's 'Conscious Pilot.'


i'll see myself out...
 
6 days ago  
A "Christian" who knows nothing about the Bible or Jesus?
I might have a heart attack and die from being not surprised.
 
6 days ago  
I went to Google to see if I could find a comprehensive list of JFC's assorted crimes. Not much luck using the search parameters I input. However, there was this list of related searches. The first one amused me.

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
6 days ago  

iheartscotch: As far as I can tell, they don't actually worship the Jesus from the Bible (we'll call him Sunday School Jesus) . They worship the things that they can take completely out of context, act superior to and use to bother everyone else (we'll call that concept Asshole Jesus)


If you happen to buy into Paul's idea that getting people saved by accepting Jesus is the only thing that matters in life, the two Jesuses converge extremely quickly. See, for example, European History.
 
6 days ago  
"If he had broken the law, then he would have been sinful and he would not have been our Messiah," White added. So breaking the law is a sin?Has she told this to any of those bakers who break nondiscrimination laws by refusing to make wedding cakes for gay couples?
 
6 days ago  

Driver: Isn't this kinda like the "Han shot first" quarrel ?
They're arguing over fictitious events.


I think there is a xkcd that addresses the importance of people in power believing fictitious stuff.
 
6 days ago  
Jesus and Donnie have some things in common.

Everything official we know about them comes from ghost writers.

/Bazinga
 
6 days ago  
 
6 days ago  
no, you see, Jesus had a twin named Jesus. Jesus was a saint, his brother Jesus? now that guy was bad, crucified too. then Jesus stole Jesus' body out of a cave and assumed his identity for tax purposes.

so you can kinda see why there's so much confusion about which Jesus people are referring to when discussing Jesus.
 
6 days ago  
getty.eduView Full Size

That's got to be at least assault and battery.
 
6 days ago  
At first glance, I assumed she was wearing an orange prison outfit. My mind went, "Republican, pastor, in prison, typical".
dawm7kda6y2v0.cloudfront.netView Full Size
 
6 days ago  

RJReves: I went to Google to see if I could find a comprehensive list of JFC's assorted crimes. Not much luck using the search parameters I input. However, there was this list of related searches. The first one amused me.

[img.fark.net image 425x375]


Punches Pilot is my Christian MMA fighter name.
 
6 days ago  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
6 days ago  

LoneWolf343: Jesus was literally a fugitive from the law.


He was literally also brown.

/and by literally we mean literary-ily, as in 'a character in a book'.
 
6 days ago  

jaytkay: At first glance, I assumed she was wearing an orange prison outfit. My mind went, "Republican, pastor, in prison, typical".
[dawm7kda6y2v0.cloudfront.net image 804x450]


No, but she is wearing an unconvincing human-suit.
 
6 days ago  

iheartscotch: As far as I can tell, they don't actually worship the Jesus from the Bible (we'll call him Sunday School Jesus) . They worship the things that they can take completely out of context, act superior to and use to bother everyone else (we'll call that concept Asshole Jesus)


As far as I can tell, they worship Future Jesus, as in the Jesus they believe if going to come back and set everything right at the end of the world. Since Future Jesus doesn't really exist outside of their imaginations, he is preferable to the Jesus of biblical record since they can ascribe any traits and desires that that they please to Future Jesus. Future Jesus has the benefit of being immune to examination (because you can't effectively examine someone else's half-baked idea,) whereas Biblical Jesus is frustrating by being so consternatingly "real" and available to the examination of outsiders, who may and often do come to their own conclusions and have plenty of evidence to support those conclusions.
 
6 days ago  
It's funny how Christ's teachings have very little to do with what Christians believe they did. They've hijacked the entire religion and twisted it to fit their desires, just like Christ said the false prophets would do.

Anyone attempting to speak with sanity about Christianity gets run out of town and ostracized. So, all you right wing Christians can eat my ass all the way to Hell,because that's where you're going!
 
6 days ago  

Martian_Astronomer: iheartscotch: As far as I can tell, they don't actually worship the Jesus from the Bible (we'll call him Sunday School Jesus) . They worship the things that they can take completely out of context, act superior to and use to bother everyone else (we'll call that concept Asshole Jesus)

If you happen to buy into Paul's idea that getting people saved by accepting Jesus is the only thing that matters in life, the two Jesuses converge extremely quickly. See, for example, European History.


It's my opinion that Paul perverted Jesus' original message in that: Jesus just wanted his message of love, acceptance and forgiveness spread. Jesus didn't care if people converted as long as they took his message to heart and started treating people better.
 
6 days ago  

RJReves: I went to Google to see if I could find a comprehensive list of JFC's assorted crimes. Not much luck using the search parameters I input. However, there was this list of related searches. The first one amused me.

[img.fark.net image 425x375]


What amuses me even more is that it must be a common enough mistake that if you search for "punches pilot", Google automatically corrects it to Pontius Pilate.

/ well, except Google Images which starts out with the mugshot of a guy who actually punched a pilot
 
6 days ago  
The Jesus in the Book did indeed break the law, but the one in her heart is as stupid as a sack of hammers.
 
6 days ago  
Y'all just need some Jesus in your lives today


img.fark.netView Full Size


img.fark.netView Full Size


img.fark.netView Full Size



/bored
 
6 days ago  

jake_lex: Seriously, did Trump show any signs that he had any religious beliefs at all before he started running for President and needed to sell himself to the Jeebus people?

My guess is he's probably spent most Sunday mornings in his life sleeping off the coke binge he went on on Saturday night.


I'm going to start asking Fundy magat's if they've noticed that the Orange Menace hasn't been too a church service since he was elected.

Didn't the Obama's go to church pretty much every Sunday?
 
6 days ago  

Karac: [getty.edu image 850x623]
That's got to be at least assault and battery.


The guy was also found guilty of blasphemy, for Christ's sake!
 
6 days ago  
It seems Pastor is as good at theology as he is at the whole "not spectacularly crashing cars into walls and/or other cars" thing.
 
6 days ago  

Skyking Skyking Do Not Answer: Karac: [getty.edu image 850x623]
That's got to be at least assault and battery.

The guy was also found guilty of blasphemy, for Christ's sake!


img.fark.netView Full Size

lord's farking name!!
 
6 days ago  

Martian_Astronomer: Driver: Isn't this kinda like the "Han shot first" quarrel ?
They're arguing over fictitious events.

It's still a slightly more interesting bit of theological minutia than we usually get in these "Ha ha, Trump supporters don't know the Bible" threads. There's a fairly standard concept in Christian soteriology which states that Jesus' death was capable of saving everyone because he lived a sinless life. Moreover, both Jesus and Paul taught that Christians should obey the law. (Paul said it was because God put earthly authorities in place.)

However, when Paula White claims Jesus couldn't have been living in Egypt illegally, because that would have been a sin, she's claiming that breaking the law is a sin in and of itself, (and not just "breaking the law without a good reason.") That is a pretty unusual claim to make, even by fundie Christian standards.


So Jesus was a DREAMer then, seeing as he was a minor when his parents took him to Egypt.
 
6 days ago  
"Unto these last"
 
6 days ago  

edmo: Yeah, that whole crucifixion thing was a real nothingburger.


WITCH HUNT!
 
6 days ago  

jaytkay: At first glance, I assumed she was wearing an orange prison outfit. My mind went, "Republican, pastor, in prison, typical".
[dawm7kda6y2v0.cloudfront.net image 804x450]


JFC she check her makeup with a dipstick or what?
 
Displayed 50 of 156 comments


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Newest | Show all


View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking

On Twitter





Top Commented
Javascript is required to view headlines in widget.
  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report