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(KSAT San Antonio)   Officers executing search warrant for cocaine find: a) cocaine. b) methamphetamine. c) you don't want to know   ( ksat.com) divider line
    More: Sad, Constable, warrant, Bronco Lane, informant saw drug, Drug addiction, Death, warrant states, previous charges  
•       •       •

11584 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Jul 2018 at 10:06 PM (6 days ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



69 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | » | Newest | Show all

 
6 days ago  
Wasn't this a scene in Trainspotting?
 
6 days ago  
is this where we post dead baby jokes?
 
6 days ago  

Dead for Tax Reasons: is this where we post dead baby jokes?


Only if it's for tax reasons.
 
6 days ago  
Oh baby!  You're right, I didn't want to know.
 
6 days ago  
Saying that just makes me want to know and then don't want to know.
 
6 days ago  
A 13'x8' piece of sheetrock is pretty crazy. I didn't know it came that big.
 
TWX
6 days ago  
I know dozens of dead baby jokes. It's a lot easier to tell and to enjoy dead baby jokes when one doesn't have a baby.

/has a baby
 
TWX
6 days ago  

It_Really_Does_Glisten: A 13'x8' piece of sheetrock is pretty crazy. I didn't know it came that big.


Baby on Board?
 
6 days ago  
How is babby killed?
 
TWX
6 days ago  

TWX: I know dozens of dead baby jokes. It's a lot easier to tell and to enjoy dead baby jokes when one doesn't have a baby.

/has a baby


TWX: It_Really_Does_Glisten: A 13'x8' piece of sheetrock is pretty crazy. I didn't know it came that big.

Baby on Board?


/not easy, but not impossible either
 
6 days ago  

It_Really_Does_Glisten: A 13'x8' piece of sheetrock is pretty crazy. I didn't know it came that big.


Maybe it's actually made of cocaine?
 
6 days ago  
Oh, I remember a combo!

What's grosser than gross?
One dead baby in a suitcase.

What's even grosser than that?
One live baby trying to eat his way out.

/me ducks
 
6 days ago  
Whatever bad things that can happen to a person in jail need to happen to the person who killed that baby, IMHO.
 
6 days ago  

Oztemprom: Oh, I remember a combo!

What's grosser than gross?
One dead baby in a suitcase.

What's even grosser than that?
One live baby trying to eat his way out.

/me ducks


a suitcase full of dead babies and one live baby....

/I fail at this.
 
6 days ago  
It's not pretty, but how else are you going to get baby powder when cutting your coke?
 
6 days ago  
Must have flown United
 
6 days ago  
Was it stapled to the chicken?
 
6 days ago  
I can't imagine being the person who made that discovery. I don't care who you are, that's got to be traumatizing.
 
6 days ago  
At least they aren't unloading a truckload with a pitchfork.
 
6 days ago  
What is the difference between a baby and a onion?
No one cries when you chop up the baby.
 
hej
6 days ago  

Dead for Tax Reasons: is this where we post dead baby jokes?


Obviously.
 
6 days ago  
"Beyond Decomposed" isn't that the name of an indie band?

/got nothin'
 
6 days ago  
Whats red and white and screams?

A peeled baby in a bag of salt
/I am not a role model...
 
6 days ago  
This is Fark. Of course we want to know.
 
6 days ago  
What's the street value of dead baby?
Cop math incoming
 
6 days ago  
This thread is an abortion

/NTTAWWT if need be
 
6 days ago  

Gravity Works: "Beyond Decomposed" isn't that the name of an indie band?

/got nothin'


Beyond Decomposed is the name of my Dying Fetus cover band.
 
6 days ago  

cretinbob: What is the difference between a baby and a onion?
No one cries when you chop up the baby.


What about the baby?
 
6 days ago  
If this were a police procedural, investigators will grill the suspects, only to hear insistent decrees that they didn't put that luggage there. DNA testing turns up a male with a record as daddy, but he's been in jail for years. Turns out he'd been banging a prison guard, and she had stashed the baby in the luggage, which had been stolen, to be fenced for drugs.
 
6 days ago  
Vanilla ice cream with chili sauce on it
 
6 days ago  
"Deputies were searching a West Side home for cocaine on the day they discovered a dead infant in a suitcase."

I hope they checked the suitcase wasn't too big for carrion first...
 
6 days ago  
That's ok. Just put it in one of those food dehydrators then you can crumble it into powder and snort it.

Never got the badge but I did train for it.
 
6 days ago  
Growing up around Chicago in the 80s, we'd drive in from the suburbs to the Robert Taylor projects to score dead babies soaked in PCP.  They were called dippin' tots back in the day.  No clue what they're called now.
 
6 days ago  
"Both are named in the warrant, but KSAT is not naming them because they are currently not charged with any crime"

There's no justice in this world.
 
6 days ago  

wildcardjack: If this were a police procedural, investigators will grill the suspects, only to hear insistent decrees that they didn't put that luggage there. DNA testing turns up a male with a record as daddy, but he's been in jail for years. Turns out he'd been banging a prison guard, and she had stashed the baby in the luggage, which had been stolen, to be fenced for drugs.


img.fark.netView Full Size
 
6 days ago  

Biledriver: Whats red and white and screams?

A peeled baby in a bag of salt
/I am not a role model...


What's the best thing about putting a baby in a blender?
Watching the expression on its face.

/ I'm so so sorry
 
6 days ago  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
6 days ago  

fusillade762: Wasn't this a scene in Trainspotting?


Yeah, but it wasn't the police that found the body.
 
6 days ago  

lindalouwho: Biledriver: Whats red and white and screams?

A peeled baby in a bag of salt
/I am not a role model...

What's the best thing about putting a baby in a blender?
Watching the expression on its face.

/ I'm so so sorry


%%
Who can take a baby
Stick ice-picks in his ears.
Ride him like a Harley while you're suckin' down a beer?
The S'n'M man.
The S'n'M man.
The S'n'M man can 'cuz he mixes it with love and makes the hurtin' feel good.
%%
 
6 days ago  
There once was dead baby from Nantucket...
 
6 days ago  

Insult Comic Bishounen: This thread is an abortion

/NTTAWWT if need be


Safe and legal.

/ Rare, except on Fark.
 
6 days ago  
What is worse than 100 dead babies on your driveway?

Cleaning them off with a snowblower
 
6 days ago  

Oztemprom: Oh, I remember a combo!

What's grosser than gross?
One dead baby in a suitcase.

What's even grosser than that?
One live baby trying to eat his way out.

/me ducks


I thought it was 12 dead babies in a suitcase, or 1 dead baby in 12 suitcases.

/sees my own way out
 
6 days ago  

bekovich: "Both are named in the warrant, but KSAT is not naming them because they are currently not charged with any crime"

There's no justice in this world.


If the baby wasn't murdered, then there's no crime, genius.
 
6 days ago  

morg: [img.fark.net image 500x260]


Yes, but there are dead baby jokes about a baby in a corner.
 
6 days ago  
should have put it in cold storage like that guy in Montana
 
6 days ago  
What do you get when you put a dead baby in your suitcase?

Arrested.
 
6 days ago  

trappedspirit: Oztemprom: Oh, I remember a combo!

What's grosser than gross?
One dead baby in a suitcase.

What's even grosser than that?
One live baby trying to eat his way out.

/me ducks

I thought it was 12 dead babies in a suitcase, or 1 dead baby in 12 suitcases.

/sees my own way out


Since a gross 144...or a Hutterite colony of dead babies...I would imagine we could make dozen suitcases joke here.
 
6 days ago  

doglover: What do you get when you put a dead baby in your suitcase?

Arrested.


The judges would have also accepted, "Hard."

What's the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari?

How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb?
 
6 days ago  
OK here goes....

Q:  How do you get five babies in one baby carriage?
A:  A blender

Q:  How do you get them back out?
A:  Tortilla chips.
 
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