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(KSAT San Antonio)   Officers executing search warrant for cocaine find: a) cocaine. b) methamphetamine. c) you don't want to know   ( ksat.com) divider line
    More: Sad, Constable, warrant, Bronco Lane, informant saw drug, Drug addiction, Death, warrant states, previous charges  
•       •       •

11713 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Jul 2018 at 10:06 PM (10 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



69 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


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2018-07-10 08:23:01 PM  
Wasn't this a scene in Trainspotting?
 
2018-07-10 08:38:46 PM  
is this where we post dead baby jokes?
 
2018-07-10 08:43:17 PM  

Dead for Tax Reasons: is this where we post dead baby jokes?


Only if it's for tax reasons.
 
2018-07-10 08:56:40 PM  
Oh baby!  You're right, I didn't want to know.
 
2018-07-10 10:08:18 PM  
Saying that just makes me want to know and then don't want to know.
 
2018-07-10 10:11:48 PM  
A 13'x8' piece of sheetrock is pretty crazy. I didn't know it came that big.
 
TWX
2018-07-10 10:12:44 PM  
I know dozens of dead baby jokes. It's a lot easier to tell and to enjoy dead baby jokes when one doesn't have a baby.

/has a baby
 
TWX
2018-07-10 10:13:03 PM  

It_Really_Does_Glisten: A 13'x8' piece of sheetrock is pretty crazy. I didn't know it came that big.


Baby on Board?
 
2018-07-10 10:13:20 PM  
How is babby killed?
 
TWX
2018-07-10 10:13:31 PM  

TWX: I know dozens of dead baby jokes. It's a lot easier to tell and to enjoy dead baby jokes when one doesn't have a baby.

/has a baby


TWX: It_Really_Does_Glisten: A 13'x8' piece of sheetrock is pretty crazy. I didn't know it came that big.

Baby on Board?


/not easy, but not impossible either
 
2018-07-10 10:18:25 PM  

It_Really_Does_Glisten: A 13'x8' piece of sheetrock is pretty crazy. I didn't know it came that big.


Maybe it's actually made of cocaine?
 
2018-07-10 10:20:55 PM  
Oh, I remember a combo!

What's grosser than gross?
One dead baby in a suitcase.

What's even grosser than that?
One live baby trying to eat his way out.

/me ducks
 
2018-07-10 10:21:42 PM  
Whatever bad things that can happen to a person in jail need to happen to the person who killed that baby, IMHO.
 
2018-07-10 10:22:11 PM  

Oztemprom: Oh, I remember a combo!

What's grosser than gross?
One dead baby in a suitcase.

What's even grosser than that?
One live baby trying to eat his way out.

/me ducks


a suitcase full of dead babies and one live baby....

/I fail at this.
 
2018-07-10 10:22:42 PM  
It's not pretty, but how else are you going to get baby powder when cutting your coke?
 
2018-07-10 10:23:08 PM  
Must have flown United
 
2018-07-10 10:24:50 PM  
Was it stapled to the chicken?
 
2018-07-10 10:25:03 PM  
I can't imagine being the person who made that discovery. I don't care who you are, that's got to be traumatizing.
 
2018-07-10 10:25:19 PM  
At least they aren't unloading a truckload with a pitchfork.
 
2018-07-10 10:27:04 PM  
What is the difference between a baby and a onion?
No one cries when you chop up the baby.
 
hej
2018-07-10 10:27:48 PM  

Dead for Tax Reasons: is this where we post dead baby jokes?


Obviously.
 
2018-07-10 10:29:20 PM  
"Beyond Decomposed" isn't that the name of an indie band?

/got nothin'
 
2018-07-10 10:35:20 PM  
Whats red and white and screams?

A peeled baby in a bag of salt
/I am not a role model...
 
2018-07-10 10:38:22 PM  
This is Fark. Of course we want to know.
 
2018-07-10 10:41:46 PM  
What's the street value of dead baby?
Cop math incoming
 
2018-07-10 10:43:50 PM  
This thread is an abortion

/NTTAWWT if need be
 
2018-07-10 10:45:35 PM  

Gravity Works: "Beyond Decomposed" isn't that the name of an indie band?

/got nothin'


Beyond Decomposed is the name of my Dying Fetus cover band.
 
2018-07-10 10:47:03 PM  

cretinbob: What is the difference between a baby and a onion?
No one cries when you chop up the baby.


What about the baby?
 
2018-07-10 10:53:12 PM  
If this were a police procedural, investigators will grill the suspects, only to hear insistent decrees that they didn't put that luggage there. DNA testing turns up a male with a record as daddy, but he's been in jail for years. Turns out he'd been banging a prison guard, and she had stashed the baby in the luggage, which had been stolen, to be fenced for drugs.
 
2018-07-10 10:56:30 PM  
Vanilla ice cream with chili sauce on it
 
2018-07-10 11:10:29 PM  
"Deputies were searching a West Side home for cocaine on the day they discovered a dead infant in a suitcase."

I hope they checked the suitcase wasn't too big for carrion first...
 
2018-07-10 11:10:34 PM  
That's ok. Just put it in one of those food dehydrators then you can crumble it into powder and snort it.

Never got the badge but I did train for it.
 
2018-07-10 11:10:43 PM  
Growing up around Chicago in the 80s, we'd drive in from the suburbs to the Robert Taylor projects to score dead babies soaked in PCP.  They were called dippin' tots back in the day.  No clue what they're called now.
 
2018-07-10 11:15:35 PM  
"Both are named in the warrant, but KSAT is not naming them because they are currently not charged with any crime"

There's no justice in this world.
 
2018-07-10 11:16:39 PM  

wildcardjack: If this were a police procedural, investigators will grill the suspects, only to hear insistent decrees that they didn't put that luggage there. DNA testing turns up a male with a record as daddy, but he's been in jail for years. Turns out he'd been banging a prison guard, and she had stashed the baby in the luggage, which had been stolen, to be fenced for drugs.


img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-07-10 11:23:20 PM  

Biledriver: Whats red and white and screams?

A peeled baby in a bag of salt
/I am not a role model...


What's the best thing about putting a baby in a blender?
Watching the expression on its face.

/ I'm so so sorry
 
2018-07-10 11:27:12 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-07-10 11:31:08 PM  

fusillade762: Wasn't this a scene in Trainspotting?


Yeah, but it wasn't the police that found the body.
 
2018-07-10 11:34:24 PM  

lindalouwho: Biledriver: Whats red and white and screams?

A peeled baby in a bag of salt
/I am not a role model...

What's the best thing about putting a baby in a blender?
Watching the expression on its face.

/ I'm so so sorry


%%
Who can take a baby
Stick ice-picks in his ears.
Ride him like a Harley while you're suckin' down a beer?
The S'n'M man.
The S'n'M man.
The S'n'M man can 'cuz he mixes it with love and makes the hurtin' feel good.
%%
 
2018-07-10 11:37:25 PM  
There once was dead baby from Nantucket...
 
2018-07-10 11:58:55 PM  

Insult Comic Bishounen: This thread is an abortion

/NTTAWWT if need be


Safe and legal.

/ Rare, except on Fark.
 
2018-07-11 12:04:17 AM  
What is worse than 100 dead babies on your driveway?

Cleaning them off with a snowblower
 
2018-07-11 12:06:06 AM  

Oztemprom: Oh, I remember a combo!

What's grosser than gross?
One dead baby in a suitcase.

What's even grosser than that?
One live baby trying to eat his way out.

/me ducks


I thought it was 12 dead babies in a suitcase, or 1 dead baby in 12 suitcases.

/sees my own way out
 
2018-07-11 12:12:38 AM  

bekovich: "Both are named in the warrant, but KSAT is not naming them because they are currently not charged with any crime"

There's no justice in this world.


If the baby wasn't murdered, then there's no crime, genius.
 
2018-07-11 12:17:27 AM  

morg: [img.fark.net image 500x260]


Yes, but there are dead baby jokes about a baby in a corner.
 
2018-07-11 12:21:00 AM  
should have put it in cold storage like that guy in Montana
 
2018-07-11 12:22:37 AM  
What do you get when you put a dead baby in your suitcase?

Arrested.
 
2018-07-11 12:24:27 AM  

trappedspirit: Oztemprom: Oh, I remember a combo!

What's grosser than gross?
One dead baby in a suitcase.

What's even grosser than that?
One live baby trying to eat his way out.

/me ducks

I thought it was 12 dead babies in a suitcase, or 1 dead baby in 12 suitcases.

/sees my own way out


Since a gross 144...or a Hutterite colony of dead babies...I would imagine we could make dozen suitcases joke here.
 
2018-07-11 12:30:28 AM  

doglover: What do you get when you put a dead baby in your suitcase?

Arrested.


The judges would have also accepted, "Hard."

What's the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari?

How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb?
 
2018-07-11 12:33:26 AM  
OK here goes....

Q:  How do you get five babies in one baby carriage?
A:  A blender

Q:  How do you get them back out?
A:  Tortilla chips.
 
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