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(Fox News)   Remember that scene from "The Office" where Oscar explains budget surpluses to Michael by talking about a lemonade stand and your parents giving you $10 to run it? It's like that, but with Mulvaney explaining bureaucracy to Trump using pizza   ( insider.foxnews.com) divider line
    More: Dumbass, United States Cabinet, Federal government of the United States, Director Mick Mulvaney, President of the United States, United States Army, Regulation, fish navigate waterfalls, Immigration Debate Simmers  
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2616 clicks; posted to Politics » on 22 Jun 2018 at 5:15 AM (20 weeks ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2018-06-21 08:30:16 PM  
And, to stupid people, that would seem complex and daunting, which is why it's on Fox News and used to justify undermining the government by, say, merging the Departments of Education and Labor.

If the average Fox News viewer was given a complete glimpse of just how much went on in their farking Xbox, they would end up on the floor, spasmodic & drooling. If you gave them a picture of the cloud, with its myriad standards, languages, services, microservices, protocols, transports, layers, etc., etc., they would gladly crack their own skulls open just to claw out the goo contained therein and thus achieve peace.
 
2018-06-21 08:36:48 PM  
Donnie is pretty stupid...
 
2018-06-21 08:57:52 PM  
and the end result is Trump will give Papa John's a gov't contract
 
2018-06-21 09:24:59 PM  
Mulvaney said that a salmon in the ocean is governed by the Department of Commerce, but that when the salmon is swimming upstream into freshwater where it breeds, it is governed by Ryan Zinke and the Department of the Interior.
On its way to the breeding grounds, it encounters a fish ladder -- a device used to help fish navigate waterfalls and other impediments -- that is governed by the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers.



So is the answer to instead make a department of salmon that governs the entire life span of salmon?
 
2018-06-22 01:52:31 AM  

spongeboob: Mulvaney said that a salmon in the ocean is governed by the Department of Commerce, but that when the salmon is swimming upstream into freshwater where it breeds, it is governed by Ryan Zinke and the Department of the Interior.
On its way to the breeding grounds, it encounters a fish ladder -- a device used to help fish navigate waterfalls and other impediments -- that is governed by the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers.

So is the answer to instead make a department of salmon that governs the entire life span of salmon?


No, the answer is the salmon should be free to go Galt because they're libertarian uberfisch.
 
2018-06-22 01:56:44 AM  

FormlessOne: And, to stupid people, that would seem complex and daunting, which is why it's on Fox News and used to justify undermining the government by, say, merging the Departments of Education and Labor.

If the average Fox News viewer was given a complete glimpse of just how much went on in their farking Xbox, they would end up on the floor, spasmodic & drooling. If you gave them a picture of the cloud, with its myriad standards, languages, services, microservices, protocols, transports, layers, etc., etc., they would gladly crack their own skulls open just to claw out the goo contained therein and thus achieve peace.


This.  I'm not saying that there aren't areas that couldn't use some simplification and reduction in redundancy, but Mulvaney's explanation is a bunch of FUD bullshiat.  A pizza shop owner doesn't deal with different government agencies depending on what he puts on his pizzas, or whether or not he also serves hot-dogs.  The necessary regulations happen in the background to make sure that if he does order hot dogs or pepperoni from his suppliers that they arrive at his shop free of salmonella or hepatitis.

If someone were to try to run a completely vertically integrated pizza shop where the owned the farm growing the wheat and tomatoes, raising the chickens and pigs, a canning facility, mill, slaughterhouse, and food processing plant to process it all, and then a retail pizza storefront, then yes, they'd be dealing with a variety of different government agencies, but in reality that situation doesn't come up.

There are probably a handful of true farm-to-table restaurants out there where there's a certain amount of vertical integration, but I seriously doubt the people running those are RWNJs clamoring for massive reductions in government.
 
2018-06-22 02:08:33 AM  
Mulvaney brought a pizza for Trump and offered to cut it. He asked, "Should I cut it into 6 or 8 pieces, Mr. President?"

Trump answered: "Better make it 6, I don't think I can handle 8 after that big breakfast."
 
2018-06-22 02:15:24 AM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-06-22 05:17:37 AM  
I don't know what's sadder, that trump needed a sesame street explanation, or that it was still too complicated for him.
 
2018-06-22 05:24:05 AM  
And?


Did it work?

Can he do that with trade policy next?
 
2018-06-22 05:25:17 AM  
Wait until he finds out that the Air Force, Navy, Army, Marines, Coast Guard, NASA, and himself all use the same helicopter.
 
2018-06-22 05:25:39 AM  
That was dumber than I was expecting.  He acts as if the chicken lays the egg and government agents are dispatched to address it; then, when the omelet is made, totally different government agents handle that.  But, you should always talk stupid to power...  Or something like that...
 
2018-06-22 05:27:19 AM  

Farking Clown Shoes: Mulvaney brought a pizza for Trump and offered to cut it. He asked, "Should I cut it into 6 or 8 pieces, Mr. President?"

Trump answered: "Better make it 6, I don't think I can handle 8 after that big breakfast."


That was lol funny, thanks.
 
2018-06-22 05:30:20 AM  
American salmon are directed by Ryan Zinke?
Land of the free indeed.
 
2018-06-22 05:30:20 AM  

spongeboob: Mulvaney said that a salmon in the ocean is governed by the Department of Commerce, but that when the salmon is swimming upstream into freshwater where it breeds, it is governed by Ryan Zinke and the Department of the Interior.
On its way to the breeding grounds, it encounters a fish ladder -- a device used to help fish navigate waterfalls and other impediments -- that is governed by the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers.


So is the answer to instead make a department of salmon that governs the entire life span of salmon?


A goose or monarch butterfly is governed by the state government of New York or Oregon or Missouri (or wherever) in the summer, but is governed by Mexico in the winter. This is an even greater absurdity.

In the interests of maintaining coherent jurisdiction over migrating wildlife, we should therefore immediately annex Canada and Mexico to the United States, erasing all national, state and provincial borders. This would avoid the obvious and pressing problems caused by wild animals crossing jurisdictional boundaries without filing appropriate paperwork.
 
2018-06-22 05:34:19 AM  
Ooh ooh better joke:

"Nobody knew pizza could be so complicated"
 
2018-06-22 05:34:24 AM  
He should have used a building metaphor.
"Imagine how easy it would be to put in a hotel if you had no rules to obey. Also, think of how much money you could make building a second one, when the first one collapsed after a few years."
 
2018-06-22 05:35:39 AM  
It's not necessarily dumb, Subby; I think most reasonable people believe that overlap between agencies should be reduced wherever possible. That said, I'm surprised he didn't point out the Nukular Weapons are property of the DoE when they're on the ground but handled by the Air Force when they're in a plane.
 
2018-06-22 05:37:31 AM  
Holy shiat these comments are hilarious.
 
2018-06-22 05:37:52 AM  
Subby, you're thinking of George, not Oscar. It's understandable as they're identical twins. And there's always a surplus in the banana stand, not a lemonade stand. Also, it's Arrested Development, not The Office. Also also, I don't remember that scene.
 
2018-06-22 05:41:37 AM  
Who would have thought that there'd be overlap in government services that historically have been worked out through legislation and regulation?
 
2018-06-22 05:51:04 AM  
If you steal from a business, the sheriff investigates. But if that business is a bank, it's the FBI. But if you stole by swapping out real bills for fakes, that's the Secret Service. If you used a gun, then it's the ATF. If you did it for drugs, then the DEA probably has a file on you. If you're not a citizen, ICE would like a word. When you try to flee, the NSA will track you and send the U.S. Marshals after you, and you will have to try to get past the Border Patrol. When the CIA picks you up in Mexico, you'll be remanded to the Bureau of Prisons. The Bureau of Engraving and Printing, the Forest Service, the Supreme Court, the IRS, the NIH, and the Post Office all have their own independent law enforcement branches, just to name a few. So we have about 30 sets of standards and training programs for what are all similar law enforcement positions. That is where the real waste is, but this isn't about waste, it's about getting rid of regulations and cutting programs.
 
2018-06-22 05:51:45 AM  
"If the pizza is made at Comet Ping Pong, it's governed by the FDA and the Bilderberg Group."
 
2018-06-22 05:52:30 AM  
And what harm does this cause such that it must end?
 
2018-06-22 05:53:35 AM  
And if the pizza is made at that one place in DC it implicates the Clintons in a child sex ring
 
2018-06-22 05:56:23 AM  

Sarah Jessica Farker: [img.fark.net image 520x683]


Thank you! I always think of him when I read stories involving this dumbass.

Let's trade the comedian with the politician and see if Trump even notices. I bet he'd do a far better job.
 
2018-06-22 05:58:03 AM  

minorshan: Sarah Jessica Farker: [img.fark.net image 520x683]

Thank you! I always think of him when I read stories involving this dumbass.

Let's trade the comedian with the politician and see if Trump even notices. I bet he'd do a far better job.


Yes yes yes. Lets.
 
2018-06-22 05:58:38 AM  
Even his dumb analogy doesn't make sense.  The department of commerce doesn't manage salmon, it manages the commercial activity of fishing.  The department of the interior manages wildlife directly, and because it doesn't build things it hired the Army Corps of Engineers to do construction projects under it's direction.

Each department is correctly leveraging it's compitancy to work together on a multidisciplinary project to most effectively accomplish a goal.
 
2018-06-22 06:01:17 AM  
Today in things that only seem smart if you're stupid:

Let's have an agency that regulates all salmon and salmon accessories regardless of circumstance.
 
2018-06-22 06:01:44 AM  
After seeing some of these posts, I feel the urge to go listen to "The Salt and Pepper Diner."
 
2018-06-22 06:07:21 AM  
He said that is part of the reason the Departments of Education and Labor should be merged. "They're all doing the same thing," he said, noting that both "try to get people ready for the workforce."

Wow.  That is a really, really broad definition of Education, and a rather narrow one for Labor.  Also very telling: "We're just educating people so we can stick 'em in jobs."
 
2018-06-22 06:07:26 AM  

BloodyMongeese: If you steal from a business, the sheriff investigates. But if that business is a bank, it's the FBI. But if you stole by swapping out real bills for fakes, that's the Secret Service. If you used a gun, then it's the ATF. If you did it for drugs, then the DEA probably has a file on you. If you're not a citizen, ICE would like a word. When you try to flee, the NSA will track you and send the U.S. Marshals after you, and you will have to try to get past the Border Patrol. When the CIA picks you up in Mexico, you'll be remanded to the Bureau of Prisons. The Bureau of Engraving and Printing, the Forest Service, the Supreme Court, the IRS, the NIH, and the Post Office all have their own independent law enforcement branches, just to name a few.


That hurt my head.
 
2018-06-22 06:10:48 AM  
That was unreal. It reminded me of the front of the boat falling off.

Clarke and Dawe - The Front Fell Off
Youtube 3m5qxZm_JqM
 
2018-06-22 06:11:57 AM  
i.pinimg.comView Full Size
 
2018-06-22 06:16:09 AM  

BloodyMongeese: If you steal from a business, the sheriff investigates. But if that business is a bank, it's the FBI. But if you stole by swapping out real bills for fakes, that's the Secret Service. If you used a gun, then it's the ATF. If you did it for drugs, then the DEA probably has a file on you. If you're not a citizen, ICE would like a word. When you try to flee, the NSA will track you and send the U.S. Marshals after you, and you will have to try to get past the Border Patrol. When the CIA picks you up in Mexico, you'll be remanded to the Bureau of Prisons. The Bureau of Engraving and Printing, the Forest Service, the Supreme Court, the IRS, the NIH, and the Post Office all have their own independent law enforcement branches, just to name a few. So we have about 30 sets of standards and training programs for what are all similar law enforcement positions. That is where the real waste is, but this isn't about waste, it's about getting rid of regulations and cutting programs.


If you conspire with the Russians to manipulate our elections, apparently, no one has jurisdiction...
 
2018-06-22 06:20:46 AM  
Was this pizza at the Salt and Pepper Diner?
 
2018-06-22 06:25:03 AM  
i.ytimg.comView Full Size

So basically, Cadet McBonespurs can handle presidenting if it's boiled down to him like this.
 
2018-06-22 06:25:41 AM  
img.fark.netView Full Size


The comments over there aren't much better.
 
2018-06-22 06:28:50 AM  

Rapmaster2000: And what harm does this cause such that it must end?


It can create cost burdens on business if there are different regulators at different stages in the value chain. Take, for instance, a chicken-processing plant. You've got, at a minimum the USDA, FDA, OSHA, IRS, and the EPA, and for a private business the SBA and if you're a publicly traded company, the SEC.

I'll just throw this out there, but what if you treated a business like an "account" - where you have a single point of contact from the government that handles the company, and brings in people from the various agencies to support activities along the way. Tax issue? Just call Frank. Poisonous runoff in the drainage ditch? Call Frank. Need an SBA loan? Call Frank. Etc. Not saying it's entirely realistic, but it seems slightly better than the byzantine structure we have today.
 
2018-06-22 06:39:19 AM  
He ain't wrong, but he is an asshole.

/ Donnie.jpg
 
2018-06-22 06:40:24 AM  

Shaggy_C: It's not necessarily dumb, Subby; I think most reasonable people believe that overlap between agencies should be reduced wherever possible. That said, I'm surprised he didn't point out the Nukular Weapons are property of the DoE when they're on the ground but handled by the Air Force when they're in a plane.


Do you really want the Air Force in charge of designing our nukes?
 
2018-06-22 06:44:07 AM  

Shaggy_C: Rapmaster2000: And what harm does this cause such that it must end?

It can create cost burdens on business if there are different regulators at different stages in the value chain. Take, for instance, a chicken-processing plant. You've got, at a minimum the USDA, FDA, OSHA, IRS, and the EPA, and for a private business the SBA and if you're a publicly traded company, the SEC.

I'll just throw this out there, but what if you treated a business like an "account" - where you have a single point of contact from the government that handles the company, and brings in people from the various agencies to support activities along the way. Tax issue? Just call Frank. Poisonous runoff in the drainage ditch? Call Frank. Need an SBA loan? Call Frank. Etc. Not saying it's entirely realistic, but it seems slightly better than the byzantine structure we have today.


So we need to assign case managers to each businesses? That sounds like something better privatized. Perhaps you could hire a lawyer and name him Frank. I wonder why no one thought of that before?
There is an expense in a business in having to comply to all regulations. We could shoulder that expense ON the government by assigning case managers, yes, but that would vastly expand the cost of government.
 
2018-06-22 06:45:06 AM  

Shaggy_C: It can create cost burdens on business if there are different regulators at different stages in the value chain. Take, for instance, a chicken-processing plant. You've got, at a minimum the USDA, FDA, OSHA, IRS, and the EPA, and for a private business the SBA and if you're a publicly traded company, the SEC.


Well, it's either that or people die of salmonella.

I'll take the agencies, thank you.

Shaggy_C: I'll just throw this out there, but what if you treated a business like an "account" - where you have a single point of contact from the government that handles the company, and brings in people from the various agencies to support activities along the way. Tax issue? Just call Frank. Poisonous runoff in the drainage ditch? Call Frank. Need an SBA loan? Call Frank. Etc. Not saying it's entirely realistic, but it seems slightly better than the byzantine structure we have today.


Do you know why we have all these agencies? Because each of these sectors is very large and very complicated and no agency can handle everything by itself. Merging them is like handing Jared Kushner the task of bringing peace to the Middle East, solving the opioid crisis, bringing criminal justice reform, being a liaison to Mexico, China and Islam, and overseeing all cyber security agencies. That's too much for one person to handle.

The US government grows at the rate of the population of the United States, as it should be. Some of these agencies weren't needed 100 years ago because there were less people back then. 320 million people and growing == more government, not less.

Anytime you hear some political wonk come up with a plan to shrink the size of the government, what they really want to do is profit or get away with some thing that hurts other people. This Administration is full of enough grift, corruption and illicit activities as it is, the last thing we want is a neutered government that can't even oversee them much less do anything to stop them.
 
2018-06-22 06:51:00 AM  
World's Best Businessman, folks!
 
2018-06-22 06:54:05 AM  

Shaggy_C: Rapmaster2000: And what harm does this cause such that it must end?

It can create cost burdens on business if there are different regulators at different stages in the value chain. Take, for instance, a chicken-processing plant. You've got, at a minimum the USDA, FDA, OSHA, IRS, and the EPA, and for a private business the SBA and if you're a publicly traded company, the SEC.

I'll just throw this out there, but what if you treated a business like an "account" - where you have a single point of contact from the government that handles the company, and brings in people from the various agencies to support activities along the way. Tax issue? Just call Frank. Poisonous runoff in the drainage ditch? Call Frank. Need an SBA loan? Call Frank. Etc. Not saying it's entirely realistic, but it seems slightly better than the byzantine structure we have today.


That's such a good idea I don't know why business's don't apply that to the rest of their activities!

Plumbing's busted?  Just call Frank.  Need some cement poured?  Call Frank.  Ran out of chickens?  Call Frank.  Driver called in sick and now we've got chicken parts up to the roof?  Call Frank.  CEO's coffee cup is empty?  Call Frank.  Out of TP in the bathroom?  Call Frank.  Someone spilled something and need to mop it up?  Call Frank.
 
2018-06-22 06:56:09 AM  

Shaggy_C: Rapmaster2000: And what harm does this cause such that it must end?

It can create cost burdens on business if there are different regulators at different stages in the value chain. Take, for instance, a chicken-processing plant. You've got, at a minimum the USDA, FDA, OSHA, IRS, and the EPA, and for a private business the SBA and if you're a publicly traded company, the SEC.

I'll just throw this out there, but what if you treated a business like an "account" - where you have a single point of contact from the government that handles the company, and brings in people from the various agencies to support activities along the way. Tax issue? Just call Frank. Poisonous runoff in the drainage ditch? Call Frank. Need an SBA loan? Call Frank. Etc. Not saying it's entirely realistic, but it seems slightly better than the byzantine structure we have today.


Frank will more-or-less have to talk to all the same people you would've had to talk to, because he isn't going to personally be a tax expert and a pollution expert and everything else. So ultimately this idea would just mean hiring vast numbers of liaisons/account managers in addition to the existing staff. And they wouldn't be cheap - to be full-service enough to matter, Frank probably needs to be a CPA and/or lawyer.

The new employees would do the same thing that companies already have people to do, but in a way that's more opaque and isn't directly accountable to the company's executives and inserts an additional step in the chain of information and raises some weird ethics/administrative issues.

It's pretty much the apotheosis of "I'm from the government and I'm here to help."
 
2018-06-22 06:57:08 AM  

Shaggy_C: Rapmaster2000: And what harm does this cause such that it must end?

It can create cost burdens on business if there are different regulators at different stages in the value chain. Take, for instance, a chicken-processing plant. You've got, at a minimum the USDA, FDA, OSHA, IRS, and the EPA, and for a private business the SBA and if you're a publicly traded company, the SEC.

I'll just throw this out there, but what if you treated a business like an "account" - where you have a single point of contact from the government that handles the company, and brings in people from the various agencies to support activities along the way. Tax issue? Just call Frank. Poisonous runoff in the drainage ditch? Call Frank. Need an SBA loan? Call Frank. Etc. Not saying it's entirely realistic, but it seems slightly better than the byzantine structure we have today.


So new Department of Business Affairs?
 
2018-06-22 06:58:06 AM  

rocker5969: He ain't wrong, but he is an asshole.

/ Donnie.jpg


Hmmmm, no. He's wrong, too. Or more accurately - nonsensical.
 
2018-06-22 06:58:39 AM  

Shaggy_C: I'll just throw this out there, but what if you treated a business like an "account" - where you have a single point of contact from the government that handles the company, and brings in people from the various agencies to support activities along the way. Tax issue? Just call Frank. Poisonous runoff in the drainage ditch? Call Frank. Need an SBA loan? Call Frank. Etc. Not saying it's entirely realistic, but it seems slightly better than the byzantine structure we have today.


So the government changes nothing, but creates an additional layer of bureaucracy in order to offload business paperwork to the taxpayer?

And that layer of coordinating bureaucracy would be totally generalist, with no specialist knowledge possible given the breadth their remit, serving purely as a middleman who needs to stamp everything that passes one way or the other?

And, even better, that layer of bureaucracy would collapse down to a single person with no effective oversight, wide-ranging discretion and constant opportunity for private communication?

I like it. We simultaneously make government bigger and less efficient, make the taxpayer offer more corporate welfare, and make bribery even easier and more efficient than it is today. It solves zero problems and worsens every problem we already have. I am surprised we have not already adapted it.
 
2018-06-22 07:14:42 AM  
It's almost as if running a nation of 325 million people is more complicated than a pizza. Thanks again Republicans for always finding simple answers to complex problems. Not the right answers, but always simple ones, for simpletons.
 
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