Skip to content
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Philly.com)   Abstain from sex unless you're married, or we'll fire you   (philly.com) divider line
    More: Dumbass, Bible, Bible Society, Employment, American Bible Society, world, wants employees, nonprofit's new policy, Religion News Service, unlawful employment practice  
•       •       •

14283 clicks; posted to Main » on 30 May 2018 at 9:52 PM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook



254 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | » | Newest | Show all

 
2018-05-30 7:52:42 PM  
This company is no doubt run by a 'smaller and less intrusive government' Republican
 
2018-05-30 7:55:03 PM  
LOL! Married people don't have sex, fool.
 
2018-05-30 7:57:38 PM  
I bet applicants are beating down their doors.
To get out.
 
2018-05-30 8:04:28 PM  
How would you even enforce that?
 
2018-05-30 8:06:31 PM  
ACLU, I am sure will be very interested in this kind of BS.
 
2018-05-30 8:13:57 PM  

TuteTibiImperes: How would you even enforce that?


Bodycams.
 
2018-05-30 8:51:22 PM  
Good luck proving it.
 
2018-05-30 9:19:07 PM  

Boo_Guy: TuteTibiImperes: How would you even enforce that?

Bodycams.


img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-05-30 9:22:55 PM  

dionysusaur: I bet applicants are beating down their doors.



Among other things.
 
2018-05-30 9:53:29 PM  
I just find it humorous that the Religious Right claims everybody else is intolerant of them, but in retrospect they are more like the modern-day Pharisee. Quick to condemn. Quick to judge. Quick to point out everybody, except them, are going to hell

They are the very ones that Jesus preached not to be like
 
2018-05-30 9:53:32 PM  
img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-05-30 9:54:43 PM  

Donald Trump's Vagina: This company is no doubt run by a 'smaller and less intrusive government' Republican


That farks his foster children that he takes in by the dozen.
 
2018-05-30 9:55:16 PM  
This is meant to punish women if they get pregnant and remove them from the company insurance.
 
2018-05-30 9:56:05 PM  
Employees who don't commit to the terms by Jan. 1, 2019, will be told to resign. The policy is a shift for the organization, which previously did not require staffers to abide by such an agreement.

I wonder what made them feel emboldened to require this now...  Hmmm...
 
2018-05-30 9:57:04 PM  

scottydoesntknow: This is meant to punish women if they get pregnant and remove them from the company insurance.


Please. Wimmin don't belong in the workplace. They belong in a kitchen, making me a sammich.
 
2018-05-30 9:58:33 PM  
Employees who don't commit to the terms by Jan. 1, 2019, will be told to resign.

Or, what?  Give me that kind of ultimatum and you'll have to fire me.
 
2018-05-30 10:00:10 PM  

Boo_Guy: TuteTibiImperes: How would you even enforce that?

Bodycams.


Or company moles
 
2018-05-30 10:03:49 PM  
dailydot.comView Full Size
 
2018-05-30 10:04:31 PM  

Ambivalence: LOL! Married people don't have sex, fool.


Sure they do.  Just not with each other.  (Eventually)
 
2018-05-30 10:05:06 PM  

Hack Patooey: Employees who don't commit to the terms by Jan. 1, 2019, will be told to resign.

Or, what?  Give me that kind of ultimatum and you'll have to fire me.


We know why they fill embolden to do this now, but if there is a democrat congress sitting on Jan.3rd, as it appears there will be, they might not be feeling so embolden on Jan. 1st.
 
2018-05-30 10:05:35 PM  
Meh, if you are not a christian you should probably not work for a company that distributes bibles around the world. Working for bigots sucks.
 
2018-05-30 10:07:01 PM  

Hack Patooey: Employees who don't commit to the terms by Jan. 1, 2019, will be told to resign.

Or, what?  Give me that kind of ultimatum and you'll have to fire me.


And I'm guessing the unemployment hearings would be real fun to watch...
 
2018-05-30 10:07:10 PM  

Mock26: Meh, if you are not a christian you should probably not work for a company that distributes bibles around the world. Working for bigots sucks.


Too bad many Christians forget the part where Jesus basically said 'Don't be an asshole'
 
2018-05-30 10:07:14 PM  

Donald Trump's Vagina: I just find it humorous that the Religious Right claims everybody else is intolerant of them, but in retrospect they are more like the modern-day Pharisee. Quick to condemn. Quick to judge. Quick to point out everybody, except them, are going to hell

They are the very ones that Jesus preached not to be like


Yarp.  They seek, through conversion, to destroy all the other religions of the world and justify it by saying they are just doing what their religion commands them to do.  But, if any other religion dares to try the same thing they are quick to get their panties all bunched up and start screaming about their 1st Amendment rights being violated.
 
2018-05-30 10:07:53 PM  

Hack Patooey: Employees who don't commit to the terms by Jan. 1, 2019, will be told to resign.

Or, what?  Give me that kind of ultimatum and you'll have to fire me.


Exactly. You want me gone, I'm sure as hell not going to make it easy for you.
 
2018-05-30 10:08:21 PM  

Donald Trump's Vagina: This company is no doubt run by a 'smaller and less intrusive government' Republican


This position is not at all contradictory to "smaller and less intrusive government" types. This aligns with "let businesses do whatever they want" which is generally a Republican position as well.

If I try and be objective, I have a hard time disagreeing with this policy other than the fact that it is stupid. It doesn't discriminate against a protected class, although I wonder if an argument could be made that the discrimination is religious in nature therefore not legal?

I am not a law talking guy but I find this scenario very interesting.
 
2018-05-30 10:08:21 PM  

Donald Trump's Vagina: I just find it humorous that the Religious Right claims everybody else is intolerant of them, but in retrospect they are more like the modern-day Pharisee. Quick to condemn. Quick to judge. Quick to point out everybody, except them, are going to hell

They are the very ones that Jesus preached not to be like


You won't find it funny when their blessed ar15s are pointed at you
 
2018-05-30 10:08:55 PM  

Ambivalence: LOL! Married people don't have sex, fool.


Sure we do. It's called Adultery. That's still OK, right?
 
2018-05-30 10:09:10 PM  

TuteTibiImperes: How would you even enforce that?


Hire ugly people.
 
2018-05-30 10:09:14 PM  
Christianity is weird.
 
2018-05-30 10:11:56 PM  

Donald Trump's Vagina: Mock26: Meh, if you are not a christian you should probably not work for a company that distributes bibles around the world. Working for bigots sucks.

Too bad many Christians forget the part where Jesus basically said 'Don't be an asshole'


And too bad that so many of them cherry pick the old testament for those passages with which they can justify their hatred and bigotry and conveniently ignore the ones that they find inconvenient.  Many a bigoted christian will cheerfully quote seviticus on why homosexuality is a sin yet they never mention the other parts of seviticus, such as talking back to your parents is punishable by death, or that women need to be shut away from everyone during their period, or not to wear mixed fabrics.  Hypocrites.
 
2018-05-30 10:12:09 PM  

djkutch: [img.fark.net image 355x355]


I'm curious why there are 3 keys.
 
2018-05-30 10:12:16 PM  

Donald Trump's Vagina: Boo_Guy: TuteTibiImperes: How would you even enforce that?

Bodycams.

Or company moles


img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-05-30 10:12:49 PM  

Mock26: Meh, if you are not a christian you should probably not work for a company that distributes bibles around the world. Working for bigots sucks.


I'm pretty sure being a Christian isn't defined by who you sleep with.
 
2018-05-30 10:13:27 PM  
Does their policy say "no sex unless you are married" or "no sex unless you are married and then only with your spouse"?

Because those are two completely different policies.

jst3p: Donald Trump's Vagina: This company is no doubt run by a 'smaller and less intrusive government' Republican

This position is not at all contradictory to "smaller and less intrusive government" types. This aligns with "let businesses do whatever they want" which is generally a Republican position as well.

If I try and be objective, I have a hard time disagreeing with this policy other than the fact that it is stupid. It doesn't discriminate against a protected class, although I wonder if an argument could be made that the discrimination is religious in nature therefore not legal?

I am not a law talking guy but I find this scenario very interesting.


Oh, and as a follow up: This is why sexual orientation and gender identity need to be federally protected classes:
In a policy recently made public, the organization also defines marriage as only between a man and a woman. That means LGBT employees could be disqualified from working at the nonprofit.
 
2018-05-30 10:13:47 PM  

djkutch: Boo_Guy: TuteTibiImperes: How would you even enforce that?

Bodycams.

[img.fark.net image 355x355]


That's a feature, not a bug.
 
2018-05-30 10:13:51 PM  
These folks should crack one of those bibles to the Book of Ruth.
 
2018-05-30 10:13:52 PM  

IgG4: ACLU, I am sure will be very interested in this kind of BS.


Fark: A company isn't violating your freedom of speech when they fire you for saying something unpopular!
Fark: ZOMG this company with views we don't like is infringing on our freedom of association!

/gotta love the hypocrisy
 
2018-05-30 10:13:58 PM  
Most conservatives are cucks, so it isn't a problem.
 
2018-05-30 10:16:58 PM  

hobnail: Mock26: Meh, if you are not a christian you should probably not work for a company that distributes bibles around the world. Working for bigots sucks.

I'm pretty sure being a Christian isn't defined by who you sleep with.


Clearly the christians who run this particular business believe that it is.
 
2018-05-30 10:17:29 PM  
Whoever came up with this idea must have been high man.
 
2018-05-30 10:17:37 PM  

Mock26: Donald Trump's Vagina: Mock26: Meh, if you are not a christian you should probably not work for a company that distributes bibles around the world. Working for bigots sucks.

Too bad many Christians forget the part where Jesus basically said 'Don't be an asshole'

And too bad that so many of them cherry pick the old testament for those passages with which they can justify their hatred and bigotry and conveniently ignore the ones that they find inconvenient.  Many a bigoted christian will cheerfully quote seviticus on why homosexuality is a sin yet they never mention the other parts of seviticus, such as talking back to your parents is punishable by death, or that women need to be shut away from everyone during their period, or not to wear mixed fabrics.  Hypocrites.


The good 'ol 'buffet line Christianity'
 
2018-05-30 10:19:53 PM  

Weaver95: Christianity is weird.


The fact that anyone still believes that shiat is even weirder. I mean, I understand why the Romans, Greeks, Norse and other cultures invented answers to questions they could not understand, but today we have:

img.fark.netView Full Size
 
2018-05-30 10:21:26 PM  

jst3p: Does their policy say "no sex unless you are married" or "no sex unless you are married and then only with your spouse"?


I had a hard time reading the policy in TFA due to their stupid Subscribe Now! popup but it looks like both.
 
2018-05-30 10:21:41 PM  

Mock26: Donald Trump's Vagina: Mock26: Meh, if you are not a christian you should probably not work for a company that distributes bibles around the world. Working for bigots sucks.

Too bad many Christians forget the part where Jesus basically said 'Don't be an asshole'

And too bad that so many of them cherry pick the old testament for those passages with which they can justify their hatred and bigotry and conveniently ignore the ones that they find inconvenient.  Many a bigoted christian will cheerfully quote seviticus on why homosexuality is a sin yet they never mention the other parts of seviticus, such as talking back to your parents is punishable by death, or that women need to be shut away from everyone during their period, or not to wear mixed fabrics.  Hypocrites.


*leviticus.  Not sure why it was corrected to seviticus.
 
2018-05-30 10:22:14 PM  

Mock26: Donald Trump's Vagina: I just find it humorous that the Religious Right claims everybody else is intolerant of them, but in retrospect they are more like the modern-day Pharisee. Quick to condemn. Quick to judge. Quick to point out everybody, except them, are going to hell

They are the very ones that Jesus preached not to be like

Yarp.  They seek, through conversion, to destroy all the other religions of the world and justify it by saying they are just doing what their religion commands them to do.


And so does extreme Islam. So in that contrast, they are really no better than ISIS.
 
2018-05-30 10:22:57 PM  
Unless you're a total dipshiat, you choose to work for "The American Bible Society", you should KNOW what you're getting yourself into.

It's like the teachers who go to private Catholic schools then throw a fit because they get fired after getting pregnant from their FWB.
I have no sympathy for these idiots.
 
2018-05-30 10:23:26 PM  

jst3p: Weaver95: Christianity is weird.

The fact that anyone still believes that shiat is even weirder. I mean, I understand why the Romans, Greeks, Norse and other cultures invented answers to questions they could not understand, but today we have:

[img.fark.net image 374x204]


It is brain washing from an early age. Most people who are christians are only christians because they were raised to be christians.  Heck, that is true of most religious people.
 
2018-05-30 10:23:37 PM  

Carousel Beast: IgG4: ACLU, I am sure will be very interested in this kind of BS.

Fark: A company isn't violating your freedom of speech when they fire you for saying something unpopular!
Fark: ZOMG this company with views we don't like is infringing on our freedom of association!


The first one is certainly true, the second one is a grayer area because the "test" is religious in nature. I think.  I bet the first one never makes it to court and the second one most likely will. So they aren't really the same unless you really want them to be the same in your head because it meets your preconceived world view.
 
2018-05-30 10:24:49 PM  

Donald Trump's Vagina: Mock26: Donald Trump's Vagina: I just find it humorous that the Religious Right claims everybody else is intolerant of them, but in retrospect they are more like the modern-day Pharisee. Quick to condemn. Quick to judge. Quick to point out everybody, except them, are going to hell

They are the very ones that Jesus preached not to be like

Yarp.  They seek, through conversion, to destroy all the other religions of the world and justify it by saying they are just doing what their religion commands them to do.

And so does extreme Islam. So in that contrast, they are really no better than ISIS.


They are better than ISIS by leaps and bounds.  Comparatively speaking you do not see as many christians blowing up non-christians with IEDs and suicide bombers.  But, just because they are better does not mean that they are not schitt.
 
Displayed 50 of 254 comments


Oldest | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | » | Newest | Show all


View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking




On Twitter



  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.