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4690604 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 Feb 2001 at 10:47 AM (17 years ago)   |   Favorite   |   Watch    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

827330 Comments     (+0 »)

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‘’ 2011-11-18 08:19:22 AM  
Did I miss somebody's birthday? Again?
‘’ 2011-11-18 09:22:07 AM  
i1223.photobucket.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-11-18 09:44:05 AM  
Happiest of birthdays to you dear lefty.

You bring the silliness which is cool.
‘’ 2011-11-18 09:45:42 AM  
That's kind of wrong Ni!. ;)
‘’ 2011-11-18 10:22:07 AM  
"kind of"?

And yet I've seen wronger.

Even the word "wronger" is wrong.
‘’ 2011-11-18 12:03:28 PM  
Happy Birthday!
‘’ 2011-11-18 03:33:07 PM  
"Wronger" is my middle name.

HB Lefty! May your festivities be ... um ... my middle name.
‘’ 2011-11-18 05:40:46 PM  
i149.photobucket.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-11-18 06:45:45 PM  
perrydrake.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-11-19 05:41:22 PM  
"I'm a Dapper DAN man!" (new window)

/I fopped the forum
//But Ididn't fop that dep you teeee!
///No, no, NO!
‘’ 2011-11-20 08:00:58 AM  
You killed it.

‘’ 2011-11-20 09:12:05 AM  
img85.imageshack.usView Full Size
‘’ 2011-11-20 08:14:27 PM  
You'd think that drink would have brought it back to life, but here it is Sunday evening again.
‘’ 2011-11-20 09:32:23 PM  
OMG I missed my 10th Farkiversary YESTERDAY.

‘’ 2011-11-20 10:28:11 PM  

zorgon: OMG I missed my 10th Farkiversary YESTERDAY.


I didn't forget, but the bunny is completely over-boiled now. Jerk.
‘’ 2011-11-20 10:37:13 PM  
10 years. Man, have you farked up big time.
‘’ 2011-11-20 10:47:07 PM  
crap, i'm even older than zorgon?

*weeps silently into his metamucil*
‘’ 2011-11-21 01:20:31 AM  
Frak, man. I should have brought flowers or something. Oh well. Booze it is!
‘’ 2011-11-21 08:56:23 AM  
‘’ 2011-11-21 09:53:41 AM  
^^^ That'd be my preference over booze.

"Can't we have both?" "Why not?" -- Trading Places
‘’ 2011-11-21 01:03:38 PM  

h2oincfs: ass.

... is the prize for surviving ten years of Fark? :hmm:

‘’ 2011-11-21 01:04:18 PM  
Feffer's, naturally.
‘’ 2011-11-21 01:05:33 PM  
Or was it Hisey's. Hm. Someone's was going through a window....
‘’ 2011-11-21 01:19:10 PM  
Sigh. That really was a great idea.

/priming the pump of reconsideration
‘’ 2011-11-21 02:02:52 PM  
i may still have that picture on a hard drive somewhere.
‘’ 2011-11-21 03:02:11 PM  
HAHA, Y'all are OLD!

What Knot: I didn't forget, but the bunny is completely over-boiled now. Jerk.

This cracked me RIGHT up.
‘’ 2011-11-21 04:36:17 PM  
There were also some awesome photoshops of that picture.

Will be great to show their kid ...
‘’ 2011-11-21 06:33:22 PM  
i.imgur.comView Full Size

WTFOMG, d00d called us n00b5!
‘’ 2011-11-21 06:34:31 PM  
Pretend today is Friday. The announcement is that I liberated two new haxorz from the Lex Humane Society.
‘’ 2011-11-21 07:37:50 PM  
that's why you can't have nice things.

i.imgur.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-11-21 07:49:20 PM  
i623.photobucket.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-11-21 07:50:53 PM  
i84.photobucket.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-11-21 07:53:29 PM  
i235.photobucket.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-11-21 09:47:53 PM  
img259.imageshack.usView Full Size
‘’ 2011-11-21 10:31:00 PM  
pinktentacle.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-11-22 08:25:31 AM  
See, That right there, is why I love this place so much.....
‘’ 2011-11-22 09:41:07 AM  
I love it cause pants are optional.
‘’ 2011-11-22 10:54:16 AM  
I'm not wearing any pants; film at 11
‘’ 2011-11-22 02:51:19 PM  
I approve of all of these messages.
‘’ 2011-11-22 02:56:46 PM  
1) Introduce new p1g5 to Fark.
3) Fark gets broken.

They're all really pissed off right now. I bought a ton of veggies for Pigsgetting and then told them they'd have to wait until Friday since I'll be out on Thursday. Yeah, not going over so well.
‘’ 2011-11-22 03:01:56 PM  
I thought Fark broke cuz Mike wasn't wearing pants.
‘’ 2011-11-22 03:18:58 PM  
If that were true then Fark would be broken a lot more.
So I hear. From reliable sources. oh dear
/goes to pick more dandilion greens
‘’ 2011-11-22 03:48:44 PM  
If only I could blame it on the Makers whitedog I drank last night.
‘’ 2011-11-22 05:01:03 PM  
i59.photobucket.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-11-22 06:32:54 PM  

leftyblonde: [ image 338x500]

HAHA, Lefty...There is a WHOLE lot of wrong going on in that picture. Who made that?
‘’ 2011-11-22 08:57:38 PM  
I made it using ArcSoft Funhouse.

/I blame it on Mike's mom?
‘’ 2011-11-22 10:17:10 PM  
i59.photobucket.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-11-22 10:17:25 PM  
Nothing bad has ever happened as a result of being pantsless. Nothing.
‘’ 2011-11-22 10:18:47 PM  
I am sooooooo close to a BINGO already.
‘’ 2011-11-23 12:46:40 AM  

What Knot: Nothing bad has ever happened as a result of being pantsless. Nothing.

i beg to differ.

*GIS at your own risk.
‘’ 2011-11-23 07:37:33 AM  

Anderrhea: Yeah, not going over so well.

Find out who's behind the insurrection. Grill the ringleader. Problem solved.
‘’ 2011-11-23 08:54:59 AM  
‘’ 2011-11-23 09:03:30 AM  
Try testing here
‘’ 2011-11-23 09:09:26 AM  
Is this thing on?


Testing one-two-theeeee....

‘’ 2011-11-23 09:24:04 AM  
‘’ 2011-11-23 10:09:28 AM  

OregonVet: *tap**tap**tap**tap*

The Mad Highlander: *fap**fap**fap**fap*


style.popcrunch.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-11-23 10:27:05 AM  

skink: OregonVet: *tap**tap**tap**tap*

The Mad Highlander: *fap**fap**fap**fap*


[ image 402x600]

i.imgur.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-11-23 10:37:24 AM  

pdrake: i beg to differ.

I stand corrected.

Also, happy Thanksgiving Eve, forumonsters.

I am fasting in anticipation.
‘’ 2011-11-23 11:04:22 AM  

Anderrhea: skink: OregonVet: *tap**tap**tap**tap*

The Mad Highlander: *fap**fap**fap**fap*


[ image 402x600]

[ image 487x478] Full Size
‘’ 2011-11-23 11:21:40 AM  
fc08.deviantart.netView Full Size
‘’ 2011-11-23 01:10:36 PM  
geography.wisc.eduView Full Size

geography.wisc.eduView Full Size

geography.wisc.eduView Full Size
‘’ 2011-11-23 03:46:55 PM  
i137.photobucket.comView Full Size

i137.photobucket.comView Full Size

i137.photobucket.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-11-23 09:46:34 PM  
okay, so, googling "flap flap flap" led me someplace...unexpected...

and so very, very nsfw.
‘’ 2011-11-24 03:39:52 AM  
what's a good coagulant?
‘’ 2011-11-24 04:38:43 AM  
Spinach (Spinacia oleracea) is an annual plant originating in the Middle East - more precisely from Afghanistan and Turkistan. Some assign its origin to the land of Persia - presently Iran. Long ago, the Arabians used it against throat and lung affections. In the 8th century, spinach was grown in Spain and France and in the 11th century it reached Sicily. In present times, the herb has become much appreciated because, according to research, fresh spinach leaves are anticancerigenic. It is a very renowned plant for its rich iron content. The iron that is contained in spinach (in its natural state) is very good for young children because when administrated at a pharmacy, it can easily be overdosed. Little do most known that apart from minerals and vitamins, spinach also contains oxalic acid - a substance that inhibits the absorption of calcium into the body.
‘’ 2011-11-24 08:01:09 AM  
[image from too old to be available]
‘’ 2011-11-24 09:59:54 AM  

OregonVet: [ image 640x473]

Holy HELL, that is ugly!

PDrake: We used corn starch on a dog with a bleeding ear, once...It worked.
‘’ 2011-11-24 11:26:14 AM  
Actually, spinach doesn't have much iron in it at all. The iron comes from the dirt left behind that the washing missed.

Also, the whole tryptophan schtick is a myth.

/buzzkill strikes again

*slaps some fresh batteries in Drinkbot*
*sets drink settings to Ozzy*
*brines the couch in 151 rum*

Have fun today!
‘’ 2011-11-24 11:31:19 AM  
Fark ate my link. Feh.
‘’ 2011-11-24 04:24:27 PM  
I just saw this. Funny.
static.someecards.comView Full Size

Gobble, Gobble
‘’ 2011-11-25 09:28:40 AM  
What the HELL am I doing up this early?
‘’ 2011-11-25 10:26:51 AM  
Drinking coffee?
‘’ 2011-11-25 10:41:14 AM  
Yes. Also, steak and potatoes for breakfast.
‘’ 2011-11-25 11:05:26 AM  
I'm having pumpkin pie :)
‘’ 2011-11-25 11:38:47 AM  

mybabysmomma: I'm having pumpkin pie :)

I'll SEE your pumpkin pie, and RAISE you chocolate cake!
‘’ 2011-11-25 11:55:22 AM  

BUT, we will be making brownies with almonds in shortly,,,AND POT ROAST!
‘’ 2011-11-25 12:26:04 PM  
Just put a venison roast in the crock pot.
‘’ 2011-11-25 12:27:45 PM  
Mine's just beef, but venison,,,yum!
‘’ 2011-11-25 02:08:12 PM  

The Mad Highlander: Just put a venison roast in the crock pot.

Been hankering to cook a venison roast, lately. Wish I had a bigger car ;-)
‘’ 2011-11-25 10:14:26 PM  
I never did cook this turkey. We'll do that tomorrow while we put up the tree.

/SO glad to be home.
‘’ 2011-11-25 10:32:18 PM  
I'm Farking in my bed!
‘’ 2011-11-25 11:00:42 PM  
‘’ 2011-11-26 07:36:17 PM  
I'm old.
‘’ 2011-11-26 07:53:07 PM  
Me too
‘’ 2011-11-26 08:21:06 PM  
Me three
‘’ 2011-11-26 09:19:15 PM  
I'm old enough to know not tell you how old I am.

/Get on my lawn
//The sarlacc needs feeding
‘’ 2011-11-26 11:12:40 PM  
‘’ 2011-11-27 11:48:03 AM  
Make your own. I'm farking hung over....
ahistoryofdrinking.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-11-28 02:19:46 PM  
Uh, hi. Um, if anyone - like, oh, the homicide investigators - asks, I was here the whole time, mmmkay? thx.
‘’ 2011-11-28 03:25:29 PM  
um, ok........
*crashes on the couch*
This has been the Monday from hell.
‘’ 2011-11-28 04:29:02 PM  
quick, zorgon, plant the incriminating evidence on her!

i'll stand over here.
‘’ 2011-11-28 05:45:44 PM  

h2oincfs: quick, zorgon, plant the incriminating evidence on her!

i'll stand over here.

3.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size

That's right schweetheart, you're taking the fall.
‘’ 2011-11-29 01:46:15 AM  
what day is it?
‘’ 2011-11-29 02:27:57 AM  
Depends on your time zone. For me, it's Godsdamnitsnotyetfriday.
‘’ 2011-11-29 02:29:24 AM  
so, i've been downgraded to a lurker.

lefty, it' my worst day.

i still care about all you people>.

i'll try and bring the funny and topical back.

hey, look . . . . (i actually made this one)

fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.netView Full Size
‘’ 2011-11-29 02:31:03 AM  
i guess i still can't use html tags.

i blame it on the tiny keys and my big, fat fingers.

you know what they say about guys with big, fat fingers . . . .
‘’ 2011-11-29 06:55:44 AM  
They wear big gloves?
‘’ 2011-11-29 09:55:52 AM  
Their nose holes are really big?
‘’ 2011-11-29 09:56:24 AM  
They play piano REALLY LOUD?
‘’ 2011-11-29 09:59:07 AM  

[ image 600x800]

img607.imageshack.usView Full Size
‘’ 2011-11-29 10:43:18 AM  
I now have a new game to play on Facebook. I find the most annoying, personal, ranty status/statii I can and comment with "Who sings that?" Then convince them that their status is a song.
‘’ 2011-11-29 10:46:48 AM  
Just Great, My Tuesday is not much better.
All ready for work, got the coat on, gloves, key's in hand, and the damn dead bolt will not unlock all the way,
Yank on that damn thing, work the lock back n forth, hand hurts, shoulder hurts.
Grabbed a screwdriver (drank it) and got the lock off as cold air shoots inside.
Got it back together, just as the sweat starts ruining my shirt.
Why can I not retire already?
oh, Tuesday, any thoughts, new lock or try and fix the crappy one I have??????
at least it will warm up into the 30's today, meh!
‘’ 2011-11-29 11:02:52 AM  
I vote for new lock, NEW LOCK!, NEW LOCK!, NEW LOCK!
‘’ 2011-11-29 11:05:29 AM  
Here, it will be in the low 60s as I reach my low 40s, although it sometimes feels the other way around.

Today, I would like to spend at least one hour doing nothing but staring at SnorgTees ads.

*puts on drool cloth*
‘’ 2011-11-29 11:26:09 AM  
There ain't but...One way out, Triva?

I would have called in trapped.
‘’ 2011-11-29 11:43:34 AM  
I vote for taking your jacket off. JACKET OFF! JACKET OFF! JACKET OFF!
‘’ 2011-11-29 11:44:25 AM  
I thought about that, no paid time left this year.
I could have taken the plastic insulation off the patio door I suppose, but you can't lock that after your out.

I was telling this to some co-workers, and I was told of "Peggy" who got her car started, but forgot something in the house, got out, shut door, not knowing that her keys were in there and it locked her out. HER LONG SKIRT WAS ALSO IN THE DOOR. So she had to either take off the skirt or rip it. but then what, her house was locked up, and her key's were in the car, (pre cell phone day's)
I guess I don't have it THAT bad.
‘’ 2011-11-29 12:06:00 PM  


‘’ 2011-11-29 12:20:58 PM  
i vote for pants off.
‘’ 2011-11-29 12:32:12 PM  
Want a jacket for free?
‘’ 2011-11-29 12:41:01 PM  
get back to me in february when it's down in the 50°s.
‘’ 2011-11-29 12:41:22 PM  
I change my vote to dance off! DANCE OFF! DANCE OFF! DANCE OFF!
‘’ 2011-11-29 12:43:18 PM  
Smirnoff! Smirnoff! Smirnoff!
‘’ 2011-11-29 12:55:42 PM  

DaveOfTheHillPeople: I reach my low 40s...

LOL. Happy Birthday, Dave.
‘’ 2011-11-29 01:07:37 PM  

trivaavirt: Want a jacket for free?

Yes. Please meet me in the hottub and deliver the jack-it.
‘’ 2011-11-29 01:14:08 PM  
‘’ 2011-11-29 04:18:36 PM  

‘’ 2011-11-29 04:49:04 PM  
some days i'd like to cock punch john knoll.
‘’ 2011-11-29 05:44:31 PM  
Thanks, OVet. :)
‘’ 2011-11-29 07:23:01 PM  
So what about those water spray systems in the produce section? Seems to me that they're trying to add weight to the vegetables.

Do you think they'd object if I brought a salad spinner and dried all the veg before checking out?
‘’ 2011-11-29 09:38:46 PM  

ski9600: Seems to me that they're trying to add weight to the vegetables.

I think my pot dealer used to do the same thing!
‘’ 2011-11-29 11:31:39 PM  
Bean stew and living alone. Two great things that go great together.
‘’ 2011-11-29 11:36:57 PM  

Anderrhea: Bean stew and living alone. Two great things that go great together.

You DO realize I can be invasive. Especially when beans are
‘’ 2011-11-29 11:49:24 PM  
Hahahaha. Even the p1g5 are offended. If anyone breaks in here looking for Christmas loot, they'll be staggering away with nothing but regret and horror.
‘’ 2011-11-30 12:27:04 AM  
one-leggedsandpiper.comView Full Size

The horror... The horror
‘’ 2011-11-30 02:26:11 PM Full Size
‘’ 2011-11-30 03:17:47 PM  
Dog's, I tells ya, just dog's.

Totally freeked me out, just a bit :-P
‘’ 2011-12-01 09:08:54 AM  
‘’ 2011-12-01 09:21:41 AM  
i.imgur.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-12-01 11:35:25 AM  
That veteran's jacket doubles as acupuncture treatment. 0_0

Here's another sign that I am now old: I still play Kingdom of Loathing. But hey, for those of you who have been away from KoL for some time, it's Crimbo time again & that means seasonal loot! The Advent calendar has already appeared & it's, shall we say, different this time. :)
‘’ 2011-12-02 10:16:32 AM  
Man, no one kills a 4rum like me.

*hangs head low*
*re-ties shoes while he's down there*
‘’ 2011-12-02 10:59:55 AM  

DaveOfTheHillPeople: Man, no one kills a 4rum like me.

Link (new window)

‘’ 2011-12-02 12:24:59 PM  
Aaaaahhh, Carly Simon's overbite is coming to get meeeeeeee!!!!!

/caffeine consumption reaching hallucinogenic stage
‘’ 2011-12-02 12:58:58 PM  
Yee haw! I'm going to be removing the pen divider so the pigs can get to know each other AND decorating the Pigsmas tree at the same time. Because nothing says "It's the Holiday Season" like brawls and yelling.
‘’ 2011-12-02 01:10:32 PM  
*sneaks chives and catnip into the mix*
‘’ 2011-12-02 02:40:26 PM  
*chrrung, chrung* Forum killa, qu'est-ce que c'est, fa fa faaa faw fa fa fa fuh fa faaah, betta: run run run run, run run awayyyyy, oh oh oh aaiiiii aye aye yie yieeeyeeahh *chrung chunk chrung-a chunka*
‘’ 2011-12-02 02:50:38 PM  
oh yeah? (new window)
‘’ 2011-12-02 03:02:11 PM  
The hell was that? Points for mullets and stunned children.
‘’ 2011-12-02 03:28:02 PM  
‘’ 2011-12-03 12:12:29 AM  
I will break into your house and tear your wife in half. heh.
‘’ 2011-12-04 09:23:00 AM  
i1223.photobucket.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-12-04 10:27:24 AM  
savoryreviews.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-12-05 08:59:45 AM  
Ding Dong
‘’ 2011-12-05 09:54:35 AM  
One ringy dingy.
Two ringy dingy.
‘’ 2011-12-05 02:02:43 PM  
Ringy dingy?

i1223.photobucket.comView Full Size

Singy Bingy!
‘’ 2011-12-05 04:41:55 PM  
i.imgur.comView Full Size

Blingy Blingy
‘’ 2011-12-06 07:30:21 AM  
i1223.photobucket.comView Full Size

Flingy dinghy!
‘’ 2011-12-06 09:18:04 AM  
okay, watched "day watch" last night.

what the...?
‘’ 2011-12-06 10:34:36 AM  
videogamemm.comView Full Size

Springy thingy!
‘’ 2011-12-06 03:48:30 PM  
i59.photobucket.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-12-06 06:09:56 PM  

h2oincfs: okay, watched "day watch" last night.

what the...?

I think you were supposed to watch the other one, first.
Not that that would have helped much.
‘’ 2011-12-06 07:30:42 PM  

zorgon: h2oincfs: okay, watched "day watch" last night.

what the...?

I think you were supposed to watch the other one, first.
Not that that would have helped much.

i did. that's why i watched the second one, hoping that it would make more sense.

it was worse.

it would probably help if i had more of a background in russian folklore, but i don't.
‘’ 2011-12-06 08:29:00 PM  
‘’ 2011-12-06 08:41:20 PM  
‘’ 2011-12-06 08:48:33 PM  
*soils armor*
‘’ 2011-12-06 09:27:24 PM  
Night watch and Day watch were awesome. The subtitles even more so. But then I loved Repo Man and Southland Tales, so, approach with caution or something like that.

And yes, you need to see them in order to understand the bit with the witch.
‘’ 2011-12-06 09:35:55 PM  
Also, Madonna at the Stuporbowl. Let's all have a prayer circle so her wardrobe won't malfunction. Her nipples probably look like reconstituted dried plums that got stomped on by the entire Duggar family.
‘’ 2011-12-06 09:37:14 PM  
Bit with the witch .........

Hmmm. Would you like to play a game, Fark Filter?
‘’ 2011-12-07 09:12:44 AM  

Anderrhea: Night watch and Day watch were awesome. The subtitles even more so. But then I loved Repo Man and Southland Tales, so, approach with caution or something like that.

And yes, you need to see them in order to understand the bit with the witch.

i also enjoyed repo man. never saw southland tales.

i did watch them in order, and i thought they were a lot of fun, but i had a lot of trouble keeping up with who was who, and what side everybody was on.
‘’ 2011-12-07 11:36:07 AM  
No mention on Fark of the Mythbusters Cannonade... It is a cover up!
‘’ 2011-12-07 12:29:18 PM  
yesterday, 3rd headline down
‘’ 2011-12-07 12:50:28 PM  
what blows is that day watch is only available by dvd on netflix and night watch is available as instant streaming.

‘’ 2011-12-07 01:56:07 PM  
i59.photobucket.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-12-07 02:47:01 PM  
i59.photobucket.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-12-07 03:04:40 PM  
Waiter, I'll have one of what that ... hamster ... is drinking.
‘’ 2011-12-07 03:09:18 PM  
Tastes fishy.....
‘’ 2011-12-07 09:45:46 PM  
today, i was called a "magnificent bastard" for the first time.
‘’ 2011-12-07 11:37:03 PM  
For me it's one or the other. Rarely at the same time. But often at least one.
‘’ 2011-12-07 11:42:09 PM  
I've been called a bastard, magnificently!
‘’ 2011-12-08 12:39:12 AM  
Magnified bastardization.
‘’ 2011-12-08 01:59:02 AM  
i275.photobucket.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-12-08 02:02:21 AM  
i718.photobucket.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-12-08 02:04:15 AM  
i236.photobucket.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-12-08 06:57:14 AM  
4.bp.blogspot.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-12-08 03:07:45 PM  
I hosed the 4um :(
‘’ 2011-12-08 04:04:11 PM  
it's ok. the winter holidays are here. all the relatives will drop by, and the place needed a good hosing down.

plus, i haven't seen e-man in a bit, and the potted plants are looking a little thirsty.
‘’ 2011-12-08 07:07:28 PM  
If any of *my* relatives stop by this didn't happen, and I ...
zuguide.comView Full Size

was never here.
‘’ 2011-12-08 09:16:08 PM  
hey, h2o I told my offspring about the muppet you and she wanted to see you still have that pic somewhere I can show her?
‘’ 2011-12-08 09:55:10 PM  

mybabysmomma: hey, h2o I told my offspring about the muppet you and she wanted to see you still have that pic somewhere I can show her?

can you refresh my memory? was it on here, or fb?
‘’ 2011-12-09 12:10:41 AM  
zorgon's not here, man.
‘’ 2011-12-09 08:01:39 AM  
He's here, all right. You just aren't noticing him.

He's a sneaker.
‘’ 2011-12-09 09:21:10 AM  
does he smell?

h20, I don't think we are on fb together,,,are we?
‘’ 2011-12-09 10:00:53 AM  
Like feet wrapped in leathery burnt bacon.

Link (new window)
‘’ 2011-12-09 10:16:33 AM  
Annnnd now my morning is shot.

Link (new window)
Link (new window)
‘’ 2011-12-09 10:31:03 AM  

mybabysmomma: does he smell?

h20, I don't think we are on fb together,,,are we?

i don't know. :( i can't keep screen names and real names straight.

anyway, i guess i don't have that pic. sorry.
‘’ 2011-12-09 01:33:48 PM  
What in the hell is an Aluminum Falcon?

What Knot: zorgon's not here, man.

Open up, it's me, man, I got the stuff, can you hurry up a bit, I think I saw a cop downstairs!
‘’ 2011-12-09 01:42:09 PM  
Dave's not here, man!
‘’ 2011-12-09 02:05:36 PM  

trivaavirt: Dave's not here, man!

i154.photobucket.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-12-09 02:07:43 PM  
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‘’ 2011-12-09 02:09:57 PM  
They got him chained up man!
‘’ 2011-12-09 10:14:12 PM  

zorgon: What in the hell is an Aluminum Falcon?

Urban dictionary has a very disturbing alternate definition, FYI.
‘’ 2011-12-10 01:02:25 PM  
Never pick a day to make kimchi when you've run out of it. The anticipation is killing me.
‘’ 2011-12-10 11:49:09 PM  

What Knot: zorgon: What in the hell is an Aluminum Falcon?

Urban dictionary has a very disturbing alternate definition, FYI.

That's so ... metal.
Let's make robot love, darling.
‘’ 2011-12-11 01:00:59 AM  
I did read the "Posting Policy":

"A note on off-topic posts: There are multiple Forums provided for off topic chatter and questions: Fark Forum, TotalFark Forum, Fark Sports Forum, Fark Tech Forum, Fark Showbiz Forum, Fark Politics Forum, Fark Parties Forum, and Fark Photoshop Forum. (The complete list is on the sidebar of the front page of Fark.) Questions/advice about Photoshops should be confined to the Photoshop Forum."
‘’ 2011-12-11 01:06:27 AM  
so, you can read then?
‘’ 2011-12-11 01:58:33 AM  
This reading thing sounds intriguing. But I'm not sure if I want to go off topic in an off topic forum, because recursion makes my head go all swimmy.
‘’ 2011-12-11 09:15:09 AM  
I need to learn how to read.
‘’ 2011-12-11 10:38:13 AM  
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‘’ 2011-12-11 10:54:02 AM  
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‘’ 2011-12-11 01:19:53 PM  

leftyblonde: [ image 378x298]

‘’ 2011-12-11 10:58:55 PM  
BOO YAH!!!!!

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Christmas present to us from my Mom.
‘’ 2011-12-12 09:43:54 AM  

zorgon: That's so ... metal.
Let's make robot love, darling.

‘’ 2011-12-12 09:45:21 AM  

What Knot: zorgon: That's so ... metal.
Let's make robot love, darling.

Stoopid Monday morning html fail.

obligatory assimilation joke with eyebrow waggle here
‘’ 2011-12-12 10:48:16 AM  
‘’ 2011-12-12 11:52:00 AM  
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‘’ 2011-12-12 12:35:54 PM Full Size
‘’ 2011-12-12 01:38:41 PM  
Bite my shiny metal ... NOT WHAT YOU WERE EXPECTING

/is going to get plenty of mileage off this Aluminum Falcon thing
‘’ 2011-12-12 09:52:31 PM  
yay, 9 years.
‘’ 2011-12-12 10:18:16 PM  
Nice, Perry! Good to see you still here.
‘’ 2011-12-12 11:52:04 PM  
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‘’ 2011-12-13 10:41:09 AM  
Ok, need some help here.....
ex-so and his brother have been passing a fruitcake back and forth for almost 20 years. (yup, hard as a rock) The thing is, every time it is passed, it has to be encased in such a way that it is hard, if not impossible to open the wrapping. Past years it's been welded in a box, put in a coffee can of cement, etc.
Any thoughts?

It IS Tuesday after all.....

yes, i come here for brilliant ideas.
‘’ 2011-12-13 10:55:50 AM  
Tupperware that's been melted shut with a hot glue gun?
One of those piñatas that won't even open when assaulted with a hacksaw?
‘’ 2011-12-13 10:58:52 AM  
‘’ 2011-12-13 11:39:39 AM  
Bake it inside another fruitcake?
‘’ 2011-12-13 12:26:53 PM  

honk: Bake it inside another fruitcake?

Or a turkey. Turcaken?
‘’ 2011-12-13 12:30:28 PM  
papier mache it
‘’ 2011-12-13 12:44:00 PM  
encase it in resin.
‘’ 2011-12-13 12:51:31 PM  
‘’ 2011-12-13 12:58:16 PM  
What scientific processes would be necessary to fossilize fruitcake? Would it leave an impression like an animal fossil, or take on the three dimensions like petrified wood?
‘’ 2011-12-13 01:04:15 PM  
All fruitcakes have been fossilized since 1873.
‘’ 2011-12-13 01:12:18 PM  
Make a chimney with real bricks. Brick up the fruitcake inside it.
‘’ 2011-12-13 01:21:44 PM  
Wonderful idea(s).....

so much better than put it in a small box, then put it in a bigger box, get it.
‘’ 2011-12-13 01:42:36 PM  
ok, here is how it's going to go.....

Take Fruitcake, place it in the carcas of a turkey (frozen) place the Turcaken in large tupperware bowl and hot glue the lid on it.
Paper mache the tupperware into the shape of giant Fruitcake.
brick it in, unsing resin as the mortar.

What am i missing.
‘’ 2011-12-13 02:08:33 PM  
‘’ 2011-12-13 02:25:58 PM  
Making into the base for a gigantic rubber band ball that you can bounce around the yard?
‘’ 2011-12-13 02:29:57 PM  

JoeCamelToe: Lamputation?

‘’ 2011-12-13 05:16:05 PM  

The Mad Highlander: carbonite.

I came in here to say that.

trivaavirt: What am i missing.

For the love of God, Montresor!
‘’ 2011-12-13 09:08:58 PM  
I know some guys. They'll make sure no one opens that cake.

*tie adjustment*
*wipe eye brow with pinky*
‘’ 2011-12-14 12:25:16 AM  
Put it in aqua regia and pretend it's a Nobel prize.
‘’ 2011-12-14 12:43:09 AM  
give it to them in a combination safe, along with a stethoscope.

zorgon: The Mad Highlander: carbonite.

I came in here to say that.

trivaavirt: What am i missing.

For the love of God, Montresor!

i love you, man.
‘’ 2011-12-14 02:13:41 PM  
my love for zorgon has killed the 4um, just like everything else it touches.

o! discordia!
‘’ 2011-12-14 02:31:06 PM  
There's probably medication for that.
‘’ 2011-12-14 03:04:22 PM  

no thanks. i learned my lesson about drug trials back at uk.

although the gills and nictitating membranes have been awesome, the feathers sprouted in a very...uncomfortable place.
‘’ 2011-12-14 11:23:41 PM  
‘’ 2011-12-15 07:23:54 AM  
‘’ 2011-12-15 09:01:44 AM  
Ichthoidexy's midnight runners.
‘’ 2011-12-15 09:10:50 AM  
"come on erliansaurus"?
‘’ 2011-12-15 09:12:07 AM  

h2oincfs: my love for zorgon has killed the 4um, just like everything else it touches.

o! discordia!

That must make masturbation Midas.
‘’ 2011-12-15 11:04:09 AM  
you're confusing sex with love again.
‘’ 2011-12-15 12:29:57 PM  

h2oincfs: you're confusing sex with love again.

Hence divorced twice.
‘’ 2011-12-15 12:38:45 PM  
see, now, that's just not fair. all you guys out there, hogging all the divorces for yourselves, and i haven't even been divorced ONCE.

when is it my turn, huh? WHEN?
‘’ 2011-12-15 12:49:30 PM  
Someone has to keep the quota up.
‘’ 2011-12-15 12:50:48 PM  
How about right after I forward some intercepted (and possibly forged) email between you and . . . who? Morgan Fairchild? You like Morgan Fairchild?

No. Let me pick somebody really hideous. Add insult to injury.

Well, long story short . . . I'm working on it for you. Thank me later.
‘’ 2011-12-15 01:18:41 PM  
Bruce Jenner!
‘’ 2011-12-15 01:26:36 PM  
honk, could you find someone for me to marry first, and then go with that plan? and i would prefer my e-mail indiscretions be with teh sigourney weaver; everybody i know has been married to mrs. fairchild, apparently.
‘’ 2011-12-15 01:36:49 PM  
Sure, I can find somebody for you to marry . . . but you won't like it. I have a cruel sense of humor.
‘’ 2011-12-15 02:01:34 PM  
so i get to suffer before, during and after?

‘’ 2011-12-15 02:01:52 PM  
Morgan Freeman
‘’ 2011-12-15 02:23:51 PM  
M. Emmett Walsh or Brian Dennehy.
‘’ 2011-12-15 06:25:44 PM  
Marriage: It's the right thing to do!

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/Satisfaction guaranteed
‘’ 2011-12-15 07:50:38 PM  

skink: Marriage: It's the right thing to do!

[ image 362x273]

/Satisfaction guaranteed

‘’ 2011-12-16 03:32:01 AM  
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‘’ 2011-12-16 07:32:04 AM  
Marriage gave me the Beetus.
‘’ 2011-12-16 08:46:43 AM  
It gave me the fetus.
3 of em.
‘’ 2011-12-16 09:10:41 AM  
It gave me white hairs and a fetus and dogs.
‘’ 2011-12-16 09:25:14 AM  
Most of y'all know what it gave me.... :P
‘’ 2011-12-16 09:42:35 AM  
It has repeatedly given me freedom from my worldly possessions. So I have THAT going for me, which is nice.
‘’ 2011-12-16 10:38:15 AM  
But you still have your other-worldly possessions, right?
‘’ 2011-12-16 04:00:36 PM  
I still think I win. Sort of...
‘’ 2011-12-16 04:17:43 PM  
‘’ 2011-12-18 01:17:39 AM  

Ni!: I still think I win. Sort of...

You still hold the title of most badass mama in thread 1. In fact the trophy has been retired.
‘’ 2011-12-18 10:20:30 AM  
Did I tell you about the time I nearly took out a horde of bikers for my Shnookie? It wasn't that long ago, actually. We were at his dad's funeral, and suddenly he disappeared. His brother said that his dad's biker friends had shown up and Shnookie had to go and "have words" with them. Well! I wasn't leaving my man alone with what I assumed were bikers causing trouble, and went to storm out there and take care of business. My man needed backup, after all.

Turns out, and this is probably for the best, that Shnookie was just telling The Guys that his grandma might have gotten upset at their lack of dress code. Asses were spared that day.
‘’ 2011-12-19 05:43:09 AM  
Marriage gave me .... about a million amusing stories about my cluelessness to tell my friends. Well, they're the only ones amused by it - but still.
‘’ 2011-12-19 06:11:31 AM  
i.imgur.comView Full Size
‘’ 2011-12-19 08:00:09 AM  
. . . now with bits of real . . .
‘’ 2011-12-19 12:35:53 PM  

honk: . . . now with bits of real . . .

‘’ 2011-12-19 02:45:12 PM  
Grace anatomy has never been good.
‘’ 2011-12-19 03:43:16 PM  
Knowledge is power...France is bacon.
‘’ 2011-12-19 04:12:26 PM  
WTF is up with the damn Tassimo ad? I go to fark because I don't have freakin' popup adds I CAN'T KILL. At least put a freakin' mute on the damn thing.
‘’ 2011-12-19 05:58:19 PM  

dam fark!
‘’ 2011-12-19 08:20:19 PM  
I find your lack of farkback disturbing.
‘’ 2011-12-20 10:07:39 AM  
I think I broke it.
Or maybe somebody spilled soda on the UPSs again.
‘’ 2011-12-20 10:25:51 AM  
Fark, I found your lack of up-ness disturbing.

But I knew you'd come back. You always do, no matter how I treat you.
‘’ 2011-12-20 10:51:09 AM  
I'm always up for you, baby.

‘’ 2011-12-20 10:51:47 AM  
"Always" is a weird looking word.
‘’ 2011-12-20 11:03:10 AM  
A PSA from possibly the only 4rumite who still plays Kingdom of Loathing:

There's a whole bunch of Crimbo content and loot that's now available. Wheeee! I repeat: Wheeee! :)
‘’ 2011-12-20 11:04:31 AM  
Speaking of weird looking words,... *gets out Scroll of Sheena Summoning*

‘’ 2011-12-20 11:40:25 AM  
I like "agog". Wonder why all the weird words start with "a"?

Ni!: I'm always up for you, baby.


‘’ 2011-12-20 05:21:51 PM  
‘’ 2011-12-20 07:25:06 PM  
Well said.
‘’ 2011-12-21 08:27:16 AM  
Say what?
‘’ 2011-12-21 08:55:34 AM  
What what?
‘’ 2011-12-21 08:56:51 AM  
In the butt