________________________

A message from DisseminationMonkey:
________________________

Five years ago, Drew gave us a space for a "Fark Bazaar" thread where we invited our brilliant and creative Fark community to post links to their online stores so we could all score some awesome stuff at each other's businesses. Well, we're doing it again, but this time we're calling it "Farketplace." Beginning on Saturday, November 7th for TotalFarkers and Monday, November 9th for all Farkers, you're all invited to link to your Etsy, eBay, Amazon or other online storefront to sell your goods. It can be pretty much anything legal: handmade décor, jewelry you made, scarves you knitted, hand-sewn footie pajamas, quilts, photography, artwork, hand-blown glass dragons, antiques... whatever fits. 

We've always known Farkers are a creative bunch, and some of the amazing examples seen in the Fartist Friday threads have been a great reminder of that. Just remember that links to your personal sites are only allowed within the Farketplace thread - linking elsewhere will be considered spam and will dealt with accordingly. Please note that Fark is not taking a cut or charging for this in any way.

Everyone's having a tough year, and we figured it would be a good idea to enable Farkers to help each other get that bread before the winter holidays. So stock up your online store and be ready to post photos, descriptions and links to it in the Farketplace.

Obligatory disclaimer: Fark will not be responsible for any transactions or other events to arise out of the Farketplace thread. Your shopping/selling will be considered off-site activities and Fark will not monitor or intervene based on those activities.
________________________

A message from Drew Curtis:  
________________________ 

We're in the final week of the busiest pre-election news cycle I've ever seen.  It's been fast paced for awhile now - since 2016 it's felt like triple time, and yet somehow this week it's ramped up even higher.  The good news is we're seeing some of the good old weird stuff that is very much pre-2016 Fark. Here's hoping for more in the future.

Thread 11,000,000 snuck up on us out of nowhere and posted overnight - appropriately it was a TFD thread about whether centaurs are sexy or not.  Have a wrong opinion on the subject? Jump into the thread and tell us.

The swear jar feature is still in progress - other stuff has jumped in the way, in particular preparation for the traffic crush we're expecting on election night.  It's still coming, just getting bumped a bit.

In other news from last week, the new ad unit test went well. We'll be running another test lasting about a week, then we'll make a final decision on whether we're keeping it or not. TotalFark and BareFark subscribers won't be able to see it as usual.

Today is the first Fark News Livestream of the week.  Normally we don't wait until Wednesday for the first livestream, but I felt a little feverish Monday morning and decided to quarantine to protect Heather and the kids.  I'm getting tested later today. We'll be back with a new livestream at 5 p.m. either way because either I'll test negative or I'll move the livestream stuff up to the room I'll be living alone in for the next two weeks.  We've got a huge backlog of news to get through.  Also - we may attempt an election night livestream Tuesday as soon as we figure out what format to try.  Let us know if you've got any ideas or suggestions there.
________________________

We now return you to your usual Fark NotNewsletter.
________________________ 


Top Comments

Some of the top-voted smartest and funniest comments from the past week

Funny:
NewportBarGuy was impressed by Badmoodman's connection to Ireland Baldwin
Pinnacle Point took a guess at the name of the pastor who peed on a fellow airplane passenger
Glitchwerks identified with what a typo in a Fark headline claimed led to a shooting in a Sam's Club
skyotter disagreed with an assertion about Farkers' reactions to a fire chief eating sushi off a naked woman
NikolaiFarkoff summed up Ireland Baldwin's "I voted" sticker pasties
NewportBarGuy saw something familiar about a man who threw a racist tantrum on an airplane
Begoggle commented about the racist Burger King flyer's planned destination
I Ate Shergar noticed a guy's very particular requirements in his dating profile
TWX pointed out an interesting turn of events
theflatline shared an Ambien story

Smart:
Daniel Boone's Farm shared a relatable story about pandemic fatigue
aimtastic felt pretty uptight about sleepwalk peeing
Scorpitron is reduced to a thin red paste pointed out what an article failed to mention about Sinead O'Connor's SNL appearance
Mr. Coffee Nerves predicted that one American tradition will go on as usual this year, but with a twist
itsaback shared a tanker driver's perspective of the truck driver who drove through a crowd of protesters in Minneapolis back in May
Pinche Mateo gave an example of people "finding" relics from Jesus being nothing new
koder had some ideas of how airlines can get back to international travel
Otera let a kitten tell its story
Chthonic Echoes put a three percent mortality rate in perspective

CSB Sunday Morning: Halloween party stories
Smart: Auntie Cheesus crashed a party, insulted someone, and made a scene
Funny: Recoil Therapy spent Halloween surprising people who came to the door

CSB [Cool Story, Bro] Sunday Morning is a thread for Farkers to share true stories from their own lives based on a weekly topic. If you have a topic idea for a CSB Sunday Morning thread, please contact Farkback ahead of time, or just submit it on Saturday afternoon/evening. Please note: While submitted CSB Sunday Morning threads have a high likelihood of being greenlit, there is no guarantee they will be.

TotalFark Discussion:
Note: This section can only be accessed by TotalFarkers  
Smart: Otera is helping a kitten with help from Farkers (with adorable photo)
Funny: OneFretAway admired The Third Man's new toy
Funny: The Third Man gave a warning if Omegle doesn't sound appealing to you
Smart: Madison_Smiled has a really sweet mom
Smart: OneFretAway assessed a situation where a Farker was waiting to be reimbursed for flying out to an interview
Funny: Ass_Master_Flash was alarmed by where this conversation was going
Funny: Ass_Master_Flash recommended a divorce lawyer
Funny: KangTheMad described yet another dangerous thing that kids these days are doing

Politics Funny:
Farking Clown Shoes pointed out the reason some Farkers might not want to celebrate young people showing up to vote
I Ate Shergar continued the line of thinking expressed in Donald Trump's tweet
bloobeary had a theory about what's going on with Mitch McConnell's hands
mrshowrules knew about another odd thing that happens to Fox News analyst Gregg Jarrett
The Googles Do Nothing explained why Trump had to cut his interview with Leslie Stahl short

Politics Smart:
NeoCortex42 questioned the judgement of Trump's inner circle
mrshowrules offered advice from Canada
cretinbob talked about the members of the U.S. Marshals' task force that killed Michael Reinoehl
Pocket Ninja discussed the differences between Trump and George W. Bush
EmmaLou argued for investigating and prosecuting Trump and his team


Top Contest Entries

Some of the top-voted contest entries from last week, listed from highest number of votes down

Photoshops:
Terrapin Bound preferred sports over music
hail2daking forked up the hiking trail
#2 brought back a familiar foe
Yammering_Splat_Vector found out this cop is not interested in lollipops
kabloink changed up Trump's makeup
noazark made an artificial intelligence that fits in your pocket
noazark had the hottest ride in Toontown
noazark did some light remodeling
RedZoneTuba designed new uniforms for the tennis team
Mojongo found a pervy cat living in a hotel

Captions:
From Caption this puma cub getting an exam:
Devolving_Spud had the cub recounting the story later
From Caption this dog getting a ride:
Driver knew that the pup had other things on its mind
From Caption this inter-species faceoff:
RedZoneTuba had a warning for the curious cetacean
Grumpy Cat saw that the dolphin was leaving
Grumpy Cat figured that the dog wanted to escape

Fartist Friday: Show & Tell Volume 4
Patmaniac showed us "Desire of Man" and told us how he came to be

This week's Fartist Friday theme, brought to you by E-brake: Halloween Limericks and Chill. Write a spooky limerick about Halloween and illustrate it using any medium you like: Photoshop, MS Paint, pen and paper, macaroni glued on a board, etc.   

Farktography: From Above
CiliarySpasm showed us what it's like to look down on people

Farktography is Fark's weekly photography contest. If you would like to suggest a Farktography theme, please contact Elsinore.


Fark Weird News Quiz (brought to you by ox45tallboy)

Another good time on the Quiz this week, although no one knows how to sort out the junk mail issue. On the bright side, that stuff does provide revenue to the Post Office, which could certainly use it. On the Quiz itself, Blackstone gets the top spot and keys to the 1000 club with a score of  1017, followed by rudemix in a distant second with 924 and Enigmamf in third with 919. Data came in fourth with 918, and Sebas finished out the top five with 914.

The hardest question on the Hard Quiz was over this year's Nobel Prize in Economics, and how the winners had contributed to our understanding of supply and demand. Only 38% of quiztakers knew that they had done major studies in the field of auctions and how to create nontraditional auctions for things difficult to sell, such as radio frequencies, maximizing the benefit to taxpayers. If only they could tell me what to do  with all these Beanie Babies.

The easiest question on the Hard Quiz was about what our friendly neighbors to the north were celebrating on October 12th. 80% of quiztakers knew that Canada celebrates their Thanksgiving on the second Monday in October, where I assume they gather in their igloos and share roast moose and poutine before falling asleep on the couch with a hockey game on. Since their Thanksgiving is more of a harvest celebration, it does make more sense to have it at the harvest time rather than weeks later when everyone is snowed in.

The hardest question on the Easy Quiz was about what fast food joint famous for the number of chickens they slaughter actually received an award from PeTA - for best vegan chicken sandwich. Only 57% of quiztakers knew that KFC has been quietly selling a "vegan chicken" sandwich since August 10. made from plant-based Lightlife vegan chicken, As of now, Popeye's has no plans for their own vegan offering, probably because they haven't yet found a recipe that people will kill each other over, which seems to be the basis of their marketing.

The easiest question on the Easy Quiz was over the new show on Food Network hosted by Tony-award winner Kristin Chenoweth. 93% of quiztakers knew that despite the use of the name in Quentin Tarantino's "Django Unchained," "Candy Land" still had enough goodwill from our childhoods to evoke memories of cutthroat competition among 7-year-olds and no real edible candy at the end for the winner. Let's hope Kristin can keep the contestants pacified with a song or something.

If you missed out the Quiz last week, you can catch up on the Fark Weird News Quiz here. 

Congratulations to the winners, and we'll be doing it all again this week.

________________________

A message from Drew Curtis:  
________________________ 

Hey, everyone.

Friday got away from me last week, so we'll be having a conversation on TotalFark about the Swear Jar this Friday instead.  Same goes for the new video ad test - looks like we're aiming for Friday because there's a debate Thursday, which makes it probably not the best time to run any kind of meaningful tests.  

Speaking of the debate, we did a test run of a livestream of the dueling town halls last week and it went really well - so well that we'll be livestreaming the Thursday debate as well.  So definitely join us on my Twitch channel for that if you can!
________________________

We now return you to your usual Fark NotNewsletter.
________________________ 


Top Comments

Some of the top-voted smartest and funniest comments from the past week

Funny:
Officer Barrelroll answered a man whose wife claims they can't hug or have sex because of the pandemic
khitsicker showed us what an owl that escaped a wildfire by getting in a helicopter mid-flight had to say
thedumbone considered one of the problems with a nude Medusa sculpture
Richard Freckle explained why one might join Nextdoor
Tell Me How My Blog Tastes told us why it's surprising that a woman told her husband they can't have sex because of COVID-19
optikeye shared a story about receiving the royal treatment at Disney World
The Pope of Manwich Village made an inspirational image featuring an optical illusion tattoo
cyberspacedout was driven to song by a COVID-19 outbreak at a Sweet 16 party
PunkTiger knew there'd be no point trying to track down the owl that took a helicopter ride
grokca pointed out what the character of Deanna Troi was often used for
LewDux noticed that somebody had sharp knees

Bonus FarkStaff Picks:
ReluctantLondon described the tiniest violin
Rapmaster2000 had a really crappy time in San Francisco

Smart:
Znuh discovered a solution to the "cat on the laptop" problem
skatedrifter shared a story about a creepy encounter while camping
Pocket Ninja gave more context for a viral video showing a protective mountain lion
standardeviation's wife discovered a code word neighbors use to disguise their racism
eurotrader gave advice to a Farker whose house flooded from Hurricane Delta
Nadie_AZ pointed out that some whining CEOs are largely to blame for the thing they're complaining about
bayoukitty told us about dealing with a flooded home
Giant Clown Shoe described learning on Nextdoor how awful many of the neighbors are
dr_blasto did not have good things to say about Five Finger Death Punch

CSB Sunday Morning: The theater
Smart: Auntie Cheesus worked hard to get a set done perfectly
Funny: xanadian blew everyone away at the premiere

CSB [Cool Story, Bro] Sunday Morning is a thread for Farkers to share true stories from their own lives based on a weekly topic. If you have a topic idea for a CSB Sunday Morning thread, please contact Farkback ahead of time, or just submit it on Saturday afternoon/evening. Please note: While submitted CSB Sunday Morning threads have a high likelihood of being greenlit, there is no guarantee they will be.

TotalFark Discussion:
Note: This section can only be accessed by TotalFarkers  
Smart: Snaps saw a lot of benefit from one invention in particular
Funny: middleoftheday figured that a question was submitted to the wrong tab
Funny: Ass_Master_Flash showed us a foolproof way to keep from getting the coronavirus
Smart: Badafuco shared the rule about putting cabbage on tacos
Funny: rosekolodny had something for the STEM tab

Politics Funny:
vudukungfu took advantage of a great reward Soup4Bonnie mentioned for Joe Biden voters
sithon thought that Donald Trump was barking up the wrong tree with his dog whistle promises
grokca added a California problem that Trump forgot to mention in a tweet
Lambskincoat demonstrated fierce loyalty to Trump
The Googles Do Nothing thought that Trump's town hall on NBC should've started with a dramatic reveal

Bonus FarkStaff Pick:
HighOnCraic knew why Rudy Giuliani didn't contact law enforcement as soon as he was offered dirt on Hunter Biden

Politics Smart:
aaronx had a theory on what allows some people to speak more eloquently than others
Joe USer adapted a speech from Fred Rogers for Mercedes Schlapp
BizarreMan pointed out that Republicans aren't even cheating right
Courtney Cox-Zucker suggested a slightly different message for Trump supporters
snowblur answered Trump's question, "VOTE FOR TRUMP, WHAT THE HELL DO YOU HAVE TO LOSE!!!"


Top Contest Entries

Some of the top-voted contest entries from last week, listed from highest number of votes down

Photoshops:
noazark found a new place for Homer to disappear into
opalakea ruined hot dogs for everyone
sgleason818 thought that these ruffles look very familiar
Yammering_Splat_Vector used a pattern to make a dress
kabloink proved that herding cats is not impossible
Mojongo showed that somehow the Germans figured out this tank's weakness
Thrakkorzog found out why this flight was delayed
Yammering_Splat_Vector showed us that it's not only bears that are Catholic
FarkingIceHole brought a celebrity-branded side dish to the picnic
Wrongo discovered that Waldo is hardly even trying anymore

Fartist Friday: Pasta
RedZoneTuba made a delicious canned deity

This week's Fartist Friday theme, brought to you by E-brake: Show & Tell Volume 4. Show us a work of art you've made, and Tell us the story behind it. Difficulty: Art you haven't posted in our F'artiste contests before.  

Farktography: I See Your Point 3
This one ended in a three-way with Merltech's bondage tree, beerrun's prickly pachypodium and Herb Utsmelz's funky-ass spider

Farktography is Fark's weekly photography contest. If you would like to suggest a Farktography theme, please contact Elsinore.


Fark Weird News Quiz (brought to you by ox45tallboy)

Another fun time on the Quiz last week, but, like the Highlander, in the end there can be only one. And an endless number of sequels. bud jones takes the top spot this week with the sole ticket to the 1000 club with his score of 1003, followed by Spidery_2k in second with 959 and The Third Man appropriately in third with 943. ThunderChild takes fourth with 941, and Walker comes in fifth with 927.

The hardest question on the Hard Quiz was over what you could no longer grab while you're waiting at the supermarket checkout line in Berkeley, CA. Only 46% of quiztakers knew that the city had banned junk food including sodas, packaged pastries, and candy bars from the immediate area of checkout lines. That's great if you have hangry and bored kids with the "I wanna candy bar," not so much if you're single and it's cheat day. But it also means you can get some additional exercise when you have to leave the line and go hunt down the Twinkies that used to be right there.

The easiest question on the Hard Quiz was actually a geography question. 90% of quiztakers knew that the Kamchatka Region, home to pristine beaches and black volcanic sand, could be found in Russia. Well, formerly home to pristine beaches - they're having a bit of an ecological crisis there at the moment, with tons of dead sea critters washing up. Perhaps soon they'll be sending political dissidents there to suffer with the odor of dead jellyfish.

The hardest question on the Easy Quiz was over the late Kenzo Takada and his contributions to world culture. Only 42% of quiztakers knew that he had spent his life in the fashion industry, creating the Kenzo brand of haute couture in France 50 years ago. You may be familiar with the somewhat popular tiger face sweatshirts from the early 2010s - although Takada himself did not design him, they were a product of his company.

The easiest question on the Easy Quiz was over the "new" product Edy's Pie. 90% of quiztakers knew that this was the new name chosen for the classic Eskimo Pie, synonymous with ice cream truck runs when I was a kid. And no, Sweden's GB Glace will not be changing the name of "Nogger Black," a variety of their popular "Nogger" bars named for their slang term for "nougat." The Black variety has a licorice shell instead of the usual chocolate covering the ice cream and nougat center, so I can't for the life of me see how it's still selling regardless of the name. I mean, licorice? Seriously? I guess maybe it gets them used to Jägermeister at an early age.

If you missed out on last week's Quiz, you can catch up on the Fark Weird News Quiz here. 

Congratulations once again to the winners, and we'll be doing it all again this week.

________________________

A message from Drew Curtis:  
________________________ 

Busy week last week. 

Last Friday on TotalFark, we had a great conversation about the SwearJar feature.  This coming Friday on TotalFark, I've got more info to share about it, in particular we've got some SwearJar UI questions and I'd like to share where we are on that.  Input will be welcomed, and again if you'd like to join the conversation about this and other upcoming Fark features, join TotalFark and we'll see you on Friday!

Monday we completed some tab changes, namely splitting out Geek into Fandom and STEM.  So far it's been going great; I especially appreciate the uptick in Fandom submissions.  A couple of open questions have popped up around topics that might belong in two tabs, in particular:

·   Does car stuff go in STEM or Fandom?  Seeing a lot of submissions to Fandom. We can also cross-post to both. 
·   TotalFarkers have suggested that perhaps wrestling belongs in Fandom and not Sports, however we can cross-post to both.

Coming possibly as soon as tomorrow, we've got a video ad unit we're going to test for 24 hours.  Unfortunately, it's one of those box video ads (audio off) that rides down the right-hand side. On the plus side, they may allow us to run best-of clips from the Fark News Livestream content in there so hopefully it's less lame.  BareFark and TotalFark subscribers won't see this of course, because no-ads is part of the subscription. 
________________________

We now return you to your usual Fark NotNewsletter.
________________________ 


Top Comments

Some of the top-voted smartest and funniest comments from the past week

Funny:
jonjr215 made a rude comment about Dolly Parton possibly posing for Playboy for her 75th birthday
Circusdog320 figured there's only one reason anyone would wear this ugly, expensive dress
naughtyrev noticed one phenomenon in particular in a colorized video of a snowball fight in 1896 France
TWX helped when someone asked to see the selfies from two university students who fell from a four-story rooftop while taking selfies
mcsiegs shared a story about getting suspended in seventh grade for wearing a tasteless shirt
nitropissering found out where such an old fashioned dress style came from
Optimus Primate thought that one of Eddie Van Halen's theories maybe didn't stand up to scientific scrutiny
brap was willing to wait for Dolly to appear in another magazine
Naido's hopes were crushed
JerseyTim thought a priest's threesome on a church altar sounded familiar

Smart:
Man On A Mission pointed out just one of Billy Porter's gorgeous outfits
brantgoose had a pretty good explanation for why Black men are disproportionately targeted by law enforcement
vicejay shared advice on what you should and shouldn't do if you want to help after a disaster
naughtyrev noticed one phenomenon in particular in a colorized video of a snowball fight in 1896 France
AdmirableSnackbar cited evidence that police were never really like the good guy cop characters from old TV shows
madgonad argued for the actual best album of the '80s
a particular individual gave a lesson in punctuation
GRCooper summed up how a home became covered with purple splotches
mrwknd argued that the IRS is not about to royally screw Prince Harry

CSB Sunday Morning: Tales from the woods
Smart: Salted Metal Honey had a terrifying run-in with a wild beast
Funny (tie): chewd pulled off an impressive feat
Funny (tie): Unobtanium accidentally brought home some souvenirs from a Boy Scout camping trip
Funny (honorable mention): ChrisDe ended up in the Fark park

CSB [Cool Story, Bro] Sunday Morning is a thread for Farkers to share true stories from their own lives based on a weekly topic. If you have a topic idea for a CSB Sunday Morning thread, please contact Farkback ahead of time, or just submit it on Saturday afternoon/evening. Please note: While submitted CSB Sunday Morning threads have a high likelihood of being greenlit, there is no guarantee they will be.

TotalFark Discussion:
Note: This section can only be accessed by TotalFarkers  
Smart: GardenWeasel shared some excellent news
Smart: flucto made two adorable additions to the family and posted an update and another update
Smart: Solty Dog made a suggestion for Fark's upcoming swear jar
Funny: Brawndo had big plans for the swear jar
Smart: Eclectic made a mouth-watering dessert

Politics Funny:
OldRod had questions about Mike Pence's change in plans
bdub77 stated the most shocking thing about a call Donald Trump had on Sean Hannity's show
OldRod described what Pence did the day after his debate with Kamala Harris
Mike Pence's Head Fly explained stealing everyone's attention during the debate
Mike_LowELL demanded an apology

Politics Smart:
Man_Without_A_Hat gave a professional analysis of Trump's post-hospital balcony performance
Serious Black fit most of the traits of someone you'd expect to be Republican
Kat09tails found new evidence of just how abnormal things have become
gilgigamesh predicted what could make Trump replace Attorney General William Barr
Calypsocookie considered what it might be like to be a political conspiracy theorist


Top Contest Entries

Some of the top-voted contest entries from last week, listed from highest number of votes down

Photoshops:
RedZoneTuba was ready for Saturday night
Herb Utsmelz gave us a Disney film remake nobody asked for
Hirightnow found out that it's Ming-Na Wen time
kabloink proved that Donald Trump has completely recovered from COVID-19
RedZoneTuba made the Dead come out on Halloween
RedZoneTuba turned a president into a king
X-Geek took this dance to a meadow
west.la.lawyer created a confusing scene
#2 went to pick up some supplies
FarkingIceHole attended a dangerous event

Fartist Friday:  Fall into fall
nanim sent out the bat signal

This week's Fartist Friday theme, brought to you by E-brake: Celebrate National Pasta Day with an homage to Pastafarianism. Using any medium - Photoshop/MSPaint/real-life items/etc -  create a tribute to the Flying Spaghetti Monster  

Farktography: Rule of Thirds, the Second Helping
inelegy captured a beautiful rural sunset

Farktography is Fark's weekly photography contest. If you would like to suggest a Farktography theme, please contact Elsinore.


Fark Weird News Quiz (brought to you by ox45tallboy)

Another great time on the Quiz next week, although I wasn't able to expand my woefully inadequate repertoire of cow jokes. We did get two people in the 1000 club, where this week we'll be showing the same movie Drew and Dallan will be watching on the Twitch Livestream Friday night. On the Quiz itself, FrancoFile came out on top with 1037, followed by WoolyManwich in second with 1005 and catmander in third with 989. Mztlplx came in fourth with 954, and Denjiro rounds out the top five with 941.

The hardest question on the Hard Quiz was over the 19th century figures James Wallace Black and William H. Mumler. Only 31% of quiztakers caught the article and knew that both were professional photographers. Black was the first man to capture an aerial photograph, and later attempted to discredit Mumler and his "spirit photographs". Mumler would capture photographs of people with their dead loved ones appearing in ghostly images in the frame, most famously of Mary Todd Lincoln with the image of Abe appearing behind her. Whatever method Mumler used for this, he did wind up later using his talents for good and invented the first practical way of transferring photographs to newsprint, although probably not with the assistance of the ghost of Benjamin Franklin.

The easiest question on the Hard Quiz was over which major fast food chain was deemed by the Supreme Court of Ireland to be serving their sandwiches on something other than "bread". 91% of quiztakers knew that it was Subway whose "pastry confections" were deemed to have too high a sugar content to count as "bread", so were to be taxed at a higher rate. For a company that went with the marketing of "we're healthier than traditional fast food", this (and their unfortunate choice of spokesperson) are probably not helping to promote that image.

The hardest question on the Easy Quiz was a comic book question. Only 55% of quiztakers knew that the characters Ryan Wilder and Kate Kane were alter egos to DC's Batwoman. After Ruby Rose declined to return to the show to play Kane in Season 2, writers decided to go with a different iteration of the character instead. Hopefully this will free up Ruby Rose to find John Wick 2 level roles instead of more schlock like The Meg.

The easiest question on the Easy Quiz was about which artist has now surpassed Whitney Houston's record as the woman with the most weeks at #1. 91% of quiztakers knew that Taylor Swift's new album had bounced back to #1 the previous week, thereby giving her the honors. I'm sure she celebrated this milestone with a night out on the town with her newest boyf- oh, wait, they broke up already. That's a shame.

If you missed out on last week's Quiz, you can catch up on the Fark Weird News Quiz here. Congratulations to the winners, and we'll be doing it all again this week.

________________________

A message from Drew Curtis:  
________________________ 

Hey everyone, hope your week went well.

Looks like we'll be making some changes to some of the Fark tabs. We're splitting out STEM as its own tab and replacing Geek with Fandom.  STEM is for the science and technology stuff, Fandom is for pretty much anything that might show up at a comic con.  If anyone's looking for some greenlights, we could use some more submissions there once the change takes place.  It'll either be later this week or early next, keep an eye out.

Upcoming feature: swear jar.  The Fark filters on naughty words started as an in-joke, but over the years people have pointed out that they should be able to swear on occasion if they really really want to.  We agree, however the filter's become a legacy holdover from the days of the early internet, and it does more on the Fark backend than just filter out swear words so we can't get rid of it.  Meanwhile, a ridiculous feature suggested by TotalFarkers is that maybe we could allow people to swear via a swear jar.

This Friday, I'll be asking TotalFarkers for input on what words should be swear jarable.  We think Carlin's Seven Words is probably a good start, but what else should be on the list?  Keep an eye out for the TFDiscussion link appearing Friday, and if you're not currently a TotalFarker you can sign up for TotalFark and join us!

Today's Fark News Livestream goes out at 3 p.m. Eastern, check it out at my Twitch channel.  We've had to trickle in a little politics here and there, but luckily the news cycle has somehow had time for a little weirdness on the side.  In particular, today we cover Whatever Happened to Ken Bone, and what compensation you're due from the government if it turns out your father was actually a deep cover government operative who took off once the job ended. And more!
________________________

We now return you to your usual Fark NotNewsletter.
________________________ 


Top Comments

Some of the top-voted smartest and funniest comments from the past week

Funny:
Petey4335 had a feeling that a photo that captures a rock climber's falling glasses in midair is authentic
SpectroBoy wasn't too sure about a plan to foil employers' monitoring software that screenshots employees' computers
capt.snicklefritz has a list of "people to punch" that includes children and Rick Moranis
Theaetetus found an example of an article's description of posture that indicates flirting
propasaurus shared a bit of trivia about  a "Last Week Tonight" segment dedicated to former coal mining CEO Bob Murray
The Minstrel Boy agreed with an assessment of a kindergarten teacher who's completely covered in tattoos
cameroncrazy1984 made an announcement when New England Patriots quarterback Cam Newton tested positive for COVID-19
Farking Clown Shoes taught us something about properly expressing ourselves when finding out a man who fought against protecting miners from black lung now has it himself
Naido described the kind of person who would shoot two people for bringing him a hamburger with mayonnaise on it
koder knew how to keep from getting into trouble for having a BB gun showing in your bedroom during an online class

Smart:
Boondock3806 interpreted the "Thin Blue Line" flag
hubiestubert discussed tactical napping
Spaceballer's login checked out in a thread about an attack on Rick Moranis
propasaurus shared a bit of trivia about  a "Last Week Tonight" segment dedicated to former coal mining CEO Bob Murray
t3knomanser defended Gene Roddenberry's opinion that there should be no interpersonal conflict in the 24th century
HugeMistake pointed out that some mishaps don't need to be seen as a huge mistake
Joe USer gave some helpful advice for your pork facials
jvl shared some tips for people who are new to camping
cartersdad came face-to-face with history in a Walmart

CSB Sunday Morning: What's the coolest thing you've ever found while exploring?
Smart: hubiestubert hid out in a German bunker
Funny: Fear the Clam discovered a very useful stamp at the law office
Funny (honorable mention): The Pope of Manwich Village showed us an awesome dragon egg

CSB [Cool Story, Bro] Sunday Morning is a thread for Farkers to share true stories from their own lives based on a weekly topic. If you have a topic idea for a CSB Sunday Morning thread, please contact Farkback ahead of time, or just submit it on Saturday afternoon/evening. Please note: While submitted CSB Sunday Morning threads have a high likelihood of being greenlit, there is no guarantee they will be.

TotalFark Discussion:
Note: This section can only be accessed by TotalFarkers  
Funny & Smart: Brawndo replied to a submitter who's living with a freeloading slob who now claims to be too sick to work
Smart: eyeq360 shared a work of art
Smart: chucknasty explained why, even though we're all tired of it, you need to hang in there and keep wearing masks
Funny: croesius learned that sometimes the disgusted is actually the disgusting
Funny: mikaloyd accidentally posted an important password
Smart: vegas_greaser had faith that we can all power through this

Politics Funny:
WayneKerr supported Donald Trump during this difficult time
Tranquil Hegemony shared a public service announcement after Trump's COVID-19 infection was revealed
gunga galunga overheard a fourth voice at the presidential debate
grokca let us know how one politician was handling Trump's diagnosis
Diogenes shared one COVID-19 symptom Trump didn't have to worry about

Bonus FarkStaff Picks:
HerptheDerp showed what the presidential debate threads were doing to the Fark servers
thatguyoverthere70 wrote a fantastic American Christmas poem

Politics Smart:
Diogenes shared one COVID-19 symptom Trump didn't have to worry about
Ginnungagap42 was shocked at what ended up being the cause of our downfall
Devolving_Spud figured Trump will continue to get his beloved high TV rankings even after he leaves office
markie_farkie thought there could be more behind Trump's debate performance that just his usual personality
RyansPrivates gave reasons for hoping Trump fully recovers


Top Contest Entries

Some of the top-voted contest entries from last week, listed from highest number of votes down

Photoshops:
kabloink showed the white nose of regret
RedZoneTuba found out why the call it The Nutcracker (sorry)
Yammering_Splat_Vector knew that what the next presidential debate really needs is more energy
RedZoneTuba accidentally made a handy copy
#2 couldn't make it any more obvious
RedZoneTuba hilariously proved that the internet has ruined us all
Bumcheese would've gotten away with this if it hadn't been for these meddling kids
kabloink gave these chicks some threads to complete their look
opalakea was hanging out with the peeps
RedZoneTuba tucked the kids in for the night

Fartist Friday: Write a poem celebrating vodak and/or tacos AND illustrate it using any medium
nanim revealed the ingredients of a Farker's diet

This week's Fartist Friday theme, brought to you by E-brake: "Fall into Fall": Create an art project with an autumn theme using Paint/Draw/Photoshop and real-life things like colorful leaves and glittery corn  

Farktography: Luminous
beerrun captured a sneaky sunbeam in Upper Antelope Canyon

Farktography is Fark's weekly photography contest. If you would like to suggest a Farktography theme, please contact Elsinore.


Fark Weird News Quiz (brought to you by ox45tallboy)

Another fun time on the Quiz last week, and hopefully some folks will take my advice and see the 1991 Sylvester Stallone farce "Oscar" when given the opportunity. A pity that no one will do so on the big screen in the 1000 club this week, as I guess I made last week's Quiz a little too hard. Gravitationally Challenged came out on top with 914, followed by WoolyManwich in second with 910 and tiezane in third with 898. FrancoFile made fourth with 852, and runwiz finishes out the top five with 830.

The hardest question on the Hard Quiz was over Hasbro's newest corporate partnership with their Yahtzee brand. Only 25% of quiztakers knew that you could now get a new Yahtzee set containing a replica of the Nissin Cup Noodles Styrofoam container, an iconic piece of American office breakroom trash. Because there's nothing more American than cheap, empty carbs laden with salt in a non-recyclable container. 

The easiest question on the Hard Quiz was about death threats in corporate governance. 90% of quiztakers knew that it was founder of Costco Jim Senegal who once threatened to kill the current CEO if he raised the price of the stores' hot dog and soda combo from the $1.50 he had set it at decades before. I really, really wish he'd gone into major league baseball management instead. 

The hardest question on last week's Easy Quiz was over which musician just had herself turned into two different figurines now available at Target, as well as a... (checks notes) signature ukulele from Fender? Anyway, only 55% percent of quiztakers knew that it was Billie Eilish and her (I'm not gonna say iconic because they're just weird right now) outfits from her "Bad Guy" and "All Good Girls" videos. Also, she can play the ukulele rather well, so if you're having trouble understanding her lyrics, you can still enjoy her music.

The easiest question on the Easy Quiz was about the expression "Jumping the Shark." 95% of quiztakers knew that the expression came from an episode of "Happy Days" in which Henry Winkler showed off his skills on waterskis by jumping over a shark. Something to remember, though - although the expression is used to denote a decline in quality of a program, that episode was from the start of season five - and the show continued for another six seasons. That's commercial success by any definition.

If you missed out on last week's Quiz, you can catch up on the Fark Weird News Quiz here.

Congratulations to the winners, and we'll be doing it all again this week.

________________________

A message from Drew Curtis:  
________________________ 

Hey everyone, hope your week has been well.

I'm not sure who got the worse end of the stick last night, those of us who watched the debate or those of us who didn't and woke up to the aftermath.  We'll cover some of the lowlights on the Fark Livestream today at 3 p.m. Eastern.

A quick heads up - we've been planning on breaking out a new STEM tab to differentiate the geek tab, however in the process of pre-populating it I've discovered that what remains in the geek tab is pretty much Fandom.  So there's a good chance we may retire Geek and create two new tabs.  Suggestions, comments, thoughts? Drop me a line (drew at fark dot com).

Just a short note for today - things have been moving fast in the news cycle for what seems like an eternity, and now it feels like they've sped up even more.  It's going to be a hell of an October.
________________________

We now return you to your usual Fark NotNewsletter.
________________________ 


Top Comments

Some of the top-voted smartest and funniest comments from the past week

Funny:
LordOfThePings showed us what Balancing Rock looked like before it fell over
Joe USer figured out why another Farker dislikes Bill Murray so much
Redh8t shared a less confusing video with a high Farker
Mantour knew how we could be honor the memory of Longcat
UltimaCS suggested a more economic alternative to a new $500 connected spin bike
SBinRR pointed out that a model who's having trouble finding work because of her unibrow has other options
Devolving_Spud reacted to the claim that male bottlenose dolphins pleasure themselves with live eels
Schroedinger's Glory Hole was quick to come up with a headline when the submitter gave up
We Ate the Necco Wafers knew the truth about Farkers' feelings toward chipmunks
jsnbase got the worst possible results on a marital rating scale from 1939
Smirky the Wonder Chimp explained why EMTs claimed a "dead" woman's chest would continue moving for an hour after death

Smart:
Cubansaltyballs decided that terrorizing a certain well-known group of villains is just too much work
arrogantbastich had a suggestion for what to do if you're up against someone who has a "taser shield"
whither_apophis predicted how an insurance company might handle an accident at a winery
Endive Wombat gave examples of how easy it can be to become addicted to painkillers
Iggie shared something many families worry about in the U.S. now
NateAsbestos figured it might be a good thing that Microsoft purchased Bethesda's parent company
scottydoesntknow possibly proved that God from the Bible is real
hubiestubert predicted trouble if churches start to also serve as bank branches in some areas
Tr0mBoNe helped bust someone for illegally dumping garbage

CSB Sunday Morning: That one time at a funeral
Smart: proco reminded a funeral director that it's best to avoid taking shortcuts when it comes to certain traditions
Funny: TheWriteGirl's friend had a memorable interaction with Grandma

CSB [Cool Story, Bro] Sunday Morning is a thread for Farkers to share true stories from their own lives based on a weekly topic. If you have a topic idea for a CSB Sunday Morning thread, please contact Farkback ahead of time, or just submit it on Saturday afternoon/evening. Please note: While submitted CSB Sunday Morning threads have a high likelihood of being greenlit, there is no guarantee they will be.

TotalFark Discussion:
Note: This section can only be accessed by TotalFarkers  
Smart: Hankie Fest told us about an innocent man paying the price for someone else's stupid and selfish decision
Smart: NM Volunteer gave advice on what to do when a client you meet on site refuses to wear a mask and gets up in your face
Smart: hobnail shared a story about a hero from FedEx
Smart: Shostie described the right way to fark around
Smart: CommieTaoist told another TotalFarker what to make first with a new 3D printer
Funny: Literally Addicted contemplated a future with more sexy times than the past
Funny: brap discussed flooring options

Politics Funny:
This Is Bold Text wasn't too sure about the headline for Ron Paul's medical emergency
GooberMcFly was touched by the reaction when Ruth Bader Ginsburg's personal trainer honored her by doing pushups
Farking Clown Shoes explained why Donald Trump claimed "the United States will be the first nation to land an astronaut on Nars"
NateAsbestos revealed the real reason Trump had to suddenly leave a press conference
gilgigamesh had quite a reaction watching Trump get booed while paying respects to Justice Ginsburg

Politics Smart:
koder wondered if people would excuse what Kyle Rittenhouse did if someone else had done it
Jack Sabbath remembered another president who was booed at a memorial service
Magorn shared an opinion on how Joe Biden should handle the debates against Donald Trump
FlashHarry gave advice to Democrats who are worried that their vote won't be counted
foo monkey wondered how priorities got so screwed up


Top Contest Entries

Some of the top-voted contest entries from last week, listed from highest number of votes down

Photoshops:
kabloink dressed up some french fries
RedZoneTuba got a little confused about how to play horseshoes
Circusdog320 created a greeting card to remind people to vote
kabloink had a space kegger
You might not want to hire Yammering_Splat_Vector as a housekeeper or babysitter
#2 showed us a lesson that's about to be learned
FirstDennis gave this kid some rock 'n' roll dreams
Yammering_Splat_Vector's greeting card is a threat or a warning
Yammering_Splat_Vector found a divine model for this dress
Resident Muslim showed an exhilarating race through the forest

Fartist Friday: Captain 2020
gunther_bumpass gave us the hero we need and deserve. Be sure to check out the other great entries, too. 

This week's Fartist Friday theme, brought to you by E-brake: This weekend will include National Poetry Day, Taco Day AND Vodak Day. Write a poem celebrating Vodak and/or Tacos, and illustrate it using any medium - pen and paper, Photoshop, sculpture, MSPaint, etc.  

Farktography: If I Toad You Once I've Toad You a Thousand Times
All Latest won with a snail sitting slimily on a succulent scarlet strawberry

Farktography is Fark's weekly photography contest. If you would like to suggest a Farktography theme, please contact Elsinore.


Fark Weird News Quiz (brought to you by ox45tallboy)

A tough time on the Quiz last week for most, although I did figure out that I was in possession of a spaghetti squash. It made for a great take on succotash with okra and diced tomatoes. However, the 1000 club remains closed this week, so more leftovers for me! On the Quiz itself, Gravitationally Challenged came out on top with 914, followed by WoolyManwich in second with 910 and tiezane in third with 898. FrancoFile took fourth with 852, and runwiz finishes out the top five with 830.

The hardest question on last week's Hard Quiz was over Google's Doodle on September 15 to kick off Hispanic Heritage Month. Only 28% of quiztakers knew the story of Felicitas Mendez, who sued her local school district in the 1940's as they insisted her two sons could not attend the same school as her daughter because their skin was too dark. While the ruling in the case of Mendez v. Westminster in 1947 did not actually result in full desegregation of California schools, its impact was certainly felt much later - the case was briefed in amicus by the NAACP's attorney Thurgood Marshall, and implemented by the-California governor Earl Warren, both of whom were involved in a lesser-known case about a decade later called Brown v Board of Education.

The easiest question on the Hard Quiz was over which Tom Cruise movie cadets at the Navy's Fighter Weapons School were prohibited from quoting. 86% of quiztakers knew the school's more familiar name is "Top Gun." I'm pretty sure they're also prohibited from riding a motorcycle on the runway, but nowadays seminude beach volleyball games are fine if you're into it.

The hardest question on the Easy Quiz was about Taco Bell Canada's new potent potable. Only 43% of quiztakers knew that our neighbors to the North could fight off the moose and swing their Zambonis by Taco Bell on the way home from the hockey match to snag a bottle of Jalapeño Noir wine to pair with their Toasted Cheesy Chalupa. If they want a Mountain Dewgarita, they'll have to make a run for the *actual* border and hit up an American Red Lobster.

The easiest question on the Easy Quiz was over Presidential souvenirs. 82% of quiztakers knew that a 2" lock of hair belonging to Abraham Lincoln was sold at auction the previous week for a whopping $81,000, along with a bloodstained telegram that conclusively disproved the theory that telegram services were shut down immediately following his assassination. Also, a lock of hair from William McKinley sold at auction in 2008 for a mere $956. So, yeah, ending slavery makes your body parts worth a lot more to the descendants of your relatives.

If you missed last week's Quiz, you can catch up on the Fark Weird News Quiz here. Congratulations to the winners, and we'll be doing it all again this week.

________________________

A message from Drew Curtis:  
________________________ 

Everyone ready for some changes?  Who doesn't love change?

A few weeks ago I asked TotalFarkers about possible changes and/or additions to the current tab categories.  In particular, over the past 20 years the Geek tab has become kind of a catch-all tab. This is partly due to the increase in coverage of science along with fandom-related events, and it doesn't really make sense to lump all these things together anymore.  Plus, I just really like science stuff and would love to link to more of it.

So sometime in the next few weeks, we'll be adding a STEM tab to split out those topics from Geek.  We're planning to start populating it in advance to make sure that 1) there are enough articles to populate a STEM tab and 2) that there are enough articles remaining on the Geek tab once the split happens.  I'm pretty sure both are correct but you never know until you try.

Once we split out STEM articles, I'm considering maybe another topic split and creating a Fandom tab where we can put all the sci-fi/fantasy/superhero/RPG stuff.  However, I suspect that might almost definitely leave no topics left in the geek tab, and if that's the case we may retire Geek entirely.  We'll have more discussions about this on TotalFark, which you should totally sign up for today if you haven't already, because there's more stuff in the pipeline and TotalFarkers will hear about it first - plus have the chance to have input.

We tried an experimental morning livestream today which went way better than I expected considering we did the previous one yesterday at 4 p.m.  Tomorrow we're shooting for 7:30 p.m., and Friday Movie Night is back at 10:30 p.m. Eastern, assuming Dallan doesn't have to run another generator out to his sister on the Florida panhandle like last week.
________________________

We now return you to your usual Fark NotNewsletter.
________________________ 


Top Comments

Some of the top-voted smartest and funniest comments from the past week

Funny:
Pocket Ninja needed some questions answered about what millennials did to shut down a hot dog shop
null figured that Chris made it a point to check out Chris' photo
TheAnalogKid brought up another thing millennials must be destroying, according to common logic
wejash was looking out for the missus
NewportBarGuy explained what happened to the Pensacola Bay Bridge
labman shared a story about three men who sold their tree-clearing services after Hurricane Hugo
Farkn Yaj Yenrac knew exactly what those durn millennials will do now that they shut down the hot dog shop
Badmoodman let us know what will happen after Tropical Storm Beta
johnny_vegas had words of encouragement for a fellow Farker
Acidicnads could see why cops would be suspicious of NPR

Bonus FarkStaff Pick:
a particular individual noticed something about three children who, along with their mother, were saved from a burning SUV by an 18-year-old

Smart:
eiger discussed the use of the phrase "proper press credentials" by the Los Angeles County Sheriff's Department
Corona Cure had some questions about a child who was run over by a corn harvester
Magorn shared information about circumstances under which other crimes a defendant is accused of are allowed to be used as evidence in a trial
Wanebo made a prediction about Jerry Falwell Jr.'s future
NewportBarGuy discussed what should be done about the large number of recent deaths at Fort Hood
Redh8t described how professional tree removers often tackle a job
Nurglitch had an idea of why orcas have been engaging in coordinated attacks on boats
Some Junkie Cosmonaut explained why J. K. Rowling doesn't deserve the benefit of the doubt when it comes to one of the characters in her new novel
vudukungfu had startling news for people who "do not believe in" masks
YabbaDabbaDouchebag had the inside scoop on frontline workers and safety precautions

CSB Sunday Morning: Wedding-related stories
Smart: Gulper Eel shared a story about things not turning out as expected
Funny: Earguy illustrated the dangers of marrying someone whose mother hates you

CSB [Cool Story, Bro] Sunday Morning is a thread for Farkers to share true stories from their own lives based on a weekly topic. If you have a topic idea for a CSB Sunday Morning thread, please contact Farkback ahead of time, or just submit it on Saturday afternoon/evening. Please note: While submitted CSB Sunday Morning threads have a high likelihood of being greenlit, there is no guarantee they will be.

TotalFark Discussion:
Note: This section can only be accessed by TotalFarkers  
Smart: Unikitty argued that it is indeed time to quit a job
Funny: Cafe Threads broke the news about the TotalFark secks parties
Funny: middleoftheday predicted TotalFarkers would find other occasions to use a particular bit of advice
Funny: Earthworm Jim Jones argued that a pool should definitely be open right now
Smart: MissFeasance needs to go back in time to win an argument with an ill-tempered customer
Funny: Louisiana_Sitar_Club showed what the bird that was stuck in rosekolodny's house was thinking
Smart: Beeblebrox named something you should do at least once in your life
Smart: rosekolodny showed what happened to the bird that was loose in the hoose
Funny: generalDisdain shared a description of Elon Musk

Bonus FarkStaff Picks:
Pray for 433
Brawndo gave great advice about something to put on your resume

Politics Funny:
revrendjim defended Trump's delay in helping Puerto Rico repair destruction from Hurricane Maria
Angry Drunk Bureaucrat thought that OdradekRex wasn't aiming high enough
HugeMistake told us how to correctly pronounce a word that Trump was having trouble with
gopher321 got overexcited when protesters swarmed the street outside Mitch McConnell's home
Pinnacle Point reminded everyone to not get carried away when owners of a Minnesota apple orchard decided to be racist on their Facebook page

Politics Smart:
ManThatHurts looked at a "both sides are bad" argument
Jack Sabbath examined how toughness is defined by many Americans
markie_farkie saw evidence that many Virginians who showed up for the first day of early in-person voting could be Democrats
Jack Sabbath shared a story about a cousin who went to a recent Trump rally
FlashHarry reminded us to think about our legacies


Top Contest Entries

Some of the top-voted contest entries from last week, listed from highest number of votes down

Photoshops:
Yammering_Splat_Vector wanted to talk to Fark's manager about our topic tags
opalakea thought that some years are just iconic
rugbyjock knows what rugbyjock is all about
Somaticasual wanted a tag for premium content
Circusdog320 figured we should celebrate having a fortune in misfortune
TrollingForColumbine made one wonder whether this cat is helping or just being a jerk
RedZoneTuba created a Fark tag for the red zone
Yammering_Splat_Vector designed a tag for when you just don't know what's going on
RedZoneTuba improved this autumn in particular
Herb Utsmelz poured a glass of sweet feline

Fartist Friday: Create something pirate themed in honor of Talk Like a Pirate Day
technomuse turned a classic joke into poetry

This week's Fartist Friday theme, brought to you by E-brake: In honor of National Comic Book Day, create your version of "Captain 2020" using ONLY MSPaint/Draw-type programs (no Photoshop or similar) or IRL drawing  

Farktography: Me, Myselfie, and I
This one ended in a tie between CiliarySpasm's magnificently-groomed facial hair and olavf's mask and catling gun

Farktography is Fark's weekly photography contest. If you would like to suggest a Farktography theme, please contact Elsinore.


Fark Weird News Quiz (brought to you by ox45tallboy)

Another great time on the Quiz last week, although I'm not sure my recipes are going to catch on any time soon. On the Quiz itself, the 1000 club is empty this week, which isn't a bad thing as it still smells like microwaved catfish for some reason. Denjiro came out on top with 930, followed by coscausticevil in second with 838 and KumquatMay in third with 833. Fourth place went to zerkalo with 828. and seelorq took fifth with 818.

The hardest question on last week's Hard Quiz was about the origins of the term "buccaneer" as a synonym for pirate. Only 27% of quiztakers knew that, like most bad things in the world, we can blame the French on this one, too. European explorers brought the idea of roasting meat on a wooden rack to the West Indies, specifically Hispaniola where French dudes loved to hang out and shoot things like wild boar, and they quickly adopted the style of boucanning their prey. When the local Spanish government grew tired of French dudes running around the countryside shooting things (like most people eventually do), they kicked them out, and these former boucaniers took up the trade of pirating where they could continue to shoot things. 

The easiest question on the Easy Quiz was over the children's book "Ron's Big Mission," which describes the experience of Ron McNair in trying to check out books from the segregated Lake City, SC public library. 70% of quiztakers knew that he grew up to be America's second Black astronaut, but was sadly lost to us in the Challenger disaster in 1986. You can still visit that same public library building in Lake City where a defiant 9-year-old once sat on the counter awaiting police  - just ask for directions to the Dr. Ronald E. McNair Life History Center.

The hardest question on the Easy Quiz was over classic American literature. Only 50% of quiztakers knew that Liev Shriber's upcoming film "Across the River and Into the Trees" is based on the book by Ernest Hemingway. No word on how many margaritas he plans to drink on set every day to get into character. 

The easiest question on the Easy Quiz was over which series E! was finally bringing to a close. 90% of quiztakers knew that there was a tiny sliver of a silver lining to 2020, in that "Keeping Up with the Kardashians" would finally come to an end. No word on how this affects Kanye West's run for President. 

If you missed last week's Quiz, you can catch up on the Fark Weird News Quiz here. Congratulations to the winners, and we'll be doing it all again this week.

________________________

A message from Drew Curtis:  
________________________ 

Hey everyone, hope your week has gone well.

This week's news meta is super distracted.  I'm not sure MSM folks have enough available resources to cover everything going on.  The surprise hurricane last night added some extra workload, wildfires, and 2020 politics are 2020 politics as usual.  There's a lot going on, I get the impression if this were the '30s or the '50s, everyone would head out to a six-martini lunch at noon Friday and call it a week. At least I would.  Maybe I'll do that, hmmm....

We've got some new interesting features that we'll be giving TotalFarkers a look at soon - none that will be available this week, but there are some great things coming.  We'll be asking TotalFarkers for input and advice, if you'd like to weigh in now's a great time to sign up for TotalFark!  Strange things are afoot at the Circle K.  Stay tuned!
________________________

We now return you to your usual Fark NotNewsletter.
________________________ 


Top Comments

Some of the top-voted smartest and funniest comments from the past week

Funny:
Abe Vigoda's Ghost got hungry while reading about "puppy girls"
Call the Guy described what happened when university student Brian Nguyen "dry" fired a gun in his apartment
Pocket Ninja was inspired by a brawl at Dollar General
Jack Sabbath pointed out why the upcoming "Dune" movie looks like garbage
Barfmaker became excited by a development in the fight between mask-wearers and anti-maskers
Tr0mBoNe answered a question about a wildfire that was started by a gender reveal party device
NeoCortex42 summed up why Candace Cameron Bure's husband copped a feel in a photo with her
ZAZ noticed an error in a headline about the Associated Press style guidelines
felching pen wrote a confusing review of a hotel that had a huge explosion
LordOfThePings explained why police in Rochester, NY reportedly tear gassed a statue of Frederick Douglass

Smart:
TommyDeuce showed how police officers in the U.S. are able to handle every type of problem
169th Cousin discussed the intention behind the movement to "defund the police"
Russ1642 shared an observation about getting promotions at work
jaylectricity had a good idea to get stores to enforce mask usage, if you can pull it off
lolmao500 mentioned another reason for Americans to take COVID-19 more seriously
bloobeary would like to see certain changes remain after the pandemic is over
cherryl taggart found a reason to continue wearing masks
Squid_for_Brains described National Guard crews who risked their lives to rescue 214 campers from a wildfire
Night Train to Wakanda suggested that a different story of the origins of Rey from the latest Star Wars movies would've been better

TotalFark Discussion:
Note: This section can only be accessed by TotalFarkers  
Funny: Beeblebrox showed us what it might look like when a Fark moderator looks for a new home
Funny: leeksfromchichis had news about a fire that was getting uncomfortably close to another Farker
Smart: merrillvillain showed off that curved wood
Funny: croesius explained why someone couldn't nominate themselves for the Noble Peace Prize
Smart: Barnacles! shared some casual Sox
Smart: Eclectic listed some pros and cons of living in California

Politics Funny:
scottydoesntknow explained why boats were sinking at the Trump Boat Parade on Lake Travis
NewportBarGuy knew what really matters when it comes to the mysterious seeds people received from China
Sin'sHero just has one question about the article in The Atlantic about Donald Trump's disrespect for the military
Jake Havechek did something special in observance of the anniversary of the 9/11 attacks
ThomasPaineTrain knew exactly how Antifa caused those boats at the Trump Parade to sink

Politics Smart:
cherryl taggart was familiar with the cause of all the problems at the Trump Boat Parade on Lake Travis
NewportBarGuy submitted a thread to tell us what effect the destruction of the U.S. Postal Service is having on veterans
El Dudereno figured incels have a lot in common with another group
Squik2 discussed the reason signs have been put up telling USPS workers not to "hold trucks"
wademh explained to Louis DeJoy why he's the Boobiesmaster general to fail at the job


Top Contest Entries

Some of the top-voted contest entries from last week, listed from highest number of votes down

Photoshops:
opalakea designed a floral skirt
RedZoneTuba showed how wild predators adapt to catch their prey
X-Geek gave us the forest at knight
RedZoneTuba took a Wiz in the woods
Thrakkorzog found out that Violet Beauregarde never left the factory after the tour
opalakea appreciated the latest French fashions
Circusdog320 discovered that this famous fish finally found the way home
RedZoneTuba learned not to dance with sharks
#2 brought a Sopwith Camel to a paper airplane fight
rugbyjock showed zebrafish larvae playing leapfrog

Fartist Friday: Musical art
aeroperf decided to make music from scratch

This week's Fartist Friday theme, brought to you by E-brake: Celebrate Talk Like A Pirate Day this weekend by creating something pirate-themed such as a haiku in pirate-speak, a pirate treasure map, dress up like a pirate, etc.

Farktography: Software Hootenanny 10
Vortex Dweller gave us a taste of the Milky Way

Farktography is Fark's weekly photography contest. If you would like to suggest a Farktography theme, please contact Elsinore.


Fark Weird News Quiz (brought to you by ox45tallboy)

Another great time on the Quiz last week, and I'm glad to say that we aren't in any danger of robots taking over for Quiz writing, although sometimes I wish they'd take over for flipping the right switches when it goes green so I wouldn't make silly mistakes like not limiting the number of questions. So that gives up our top 10 from last week: 

Cardinal Ximenez 1081
AlfalfaMale 1070
OkieDookie 1053
NM Volunteer 1021
jim32rr 1004
Hassan Ben Sobr1001
Dead for Tax Reasons 998
JasonOfOrillia 988
Denjiro 964
zerkalo 925

The hardest question on the Hard Quiz was over those wacky waffle eaters in Belgium and what they embedded in a public fountain in the town of Verviers back in 1883. Only 39% of quiztakers knew that rather than artifacts like a daily newspaper or town proclamations or local artisan workmanship, someone found the actual heart of the town's first mayor (who had died back in 1839) and decided to stick it in there. I'm willing to bet that the wife of whoever was keeping that thing probably had something to do with it. "Mattéo, you've had that thing lying around for 44 years. It's weird and our friends are creeped out every time they come over. You're getting rid of it this weekend, and that's final!"

The easiest question on the Hard Quiz was about those wacky Portlanders (Portlandites? Portlandians?) and their eternal quest to Keep Portland Weird. 80% of quiztakers knew that the guy wandering around dressed like a Sleestak was paying homage to the fish-man critters from "Land of the Lost". Or maybe that was his way of offering directions to lost tourists, I dunno.

The hardest question on the Easy Quiz was about what unwanted sequel Johnny Depp was filming that left him too busy to prosecute a defemation suit against his ex-wife. Only 33% of quiztakers knew he was now in production of "Fantastic Beasts 3" for some reason. According to Screenrant, Disney is considering two different directions for "Pirates of the Caribbean 6," one of which might involve Captain Jack Sparrow in a limited role, the other of which won't at all. 

The easiest question on the Easy Quiz was over "Cole & Marmalade." 89% of quiztakers knew that Cole and Marmalade were two cats whose antics were considered "intellectual property" by a guy who was hired by their owner to promote them, and at one point had a legal injunction against their owner prohibiting him from posting pics of the kitties online. Luckily for fans, they have now returned to social media, although I'm pretty sure that like all cats, they really don't care.

If you missed out on last week's Quiz, you can catch up on the Fark Weird News Quiz right here.

Congratulations once again to the winners, and we'll be doing it all again this week.

________________________

A message from Drew Curtis:  
________________________ 

Hey everyone hope your week has been well.

This week's news meta started out heavily slanted toward weird news, but as of Wednesday afternoon, all the air got sucked out of the news cycle by politics stuff.  And fires if you live on the west coast.  Stay safe out there.  Don't worry, East Coast, a couple new storm systems popped up in the Atlantic, getting us ever closer to 2020 being the first year that we run out of names for storms.

We're finally loading the last of the new Fark tagline ideas from the TotalFark thread a couple weeks ago, thanks to all who participated. I've got Storm doing it as an after-school project, he just turned 17 by the way if you needed to feel old today.

This Friday during TotalFark Office Hours, we're discussing NotNewsletter email layouts, would love to hear everyone's thoughts and suggestions on that.
________________________

We now return you to your usual Fark NotNewsletter.
________________________ 


Top Comments

Some of the top-voted smartest and funniest comments from the past week

Funny:
KingOfTown showed how Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson is doing since his COVID-19 diagnosis
swankywanky reassured us about a somewhat complicated situation
HighlanderRPI knew how Disney can address the loss of Chadwick Boseman in future Marvel movies
Nadie_AZ realized something upon seeing a woman being arrested for insulting the size of a cop's pants pal
foo monkey was worried about a friend from the internet
Mindlock pointed out that weddingsinger was making assumptions about racing star Miguel Oliveira marrying his stepsister
jbc explained why it's unreasonable to expect people to wear masks in Family Dollar
NikolaiFarkoff gave examples of insults between rival Alabama high schools that got their football game canceled
downstairs praised one of Family Dollar's store policies
Begoggle had a pretty good idea of why Penn State's team doctor initially shared an overestimate of Big Ten athletes with heart conditions from COVID-19

Smart:
capn' fun gave an example of how hard COVID-19 can hit you even if you live through it
FriarReb98 predicted what will happen when more businesses close down
eurotrader was hoping for a lawsuit for false arrest mainly to get a look at the discovery materials
Sin'sHero corrected Mad Scientist's comment about a sensitive cop arresting a woman for insulting him
naughtyrev had an idea on how to begin to replenish a coral bed where some douchebags dropped their yacht's anchor
TWX discussed why social media has become a problem
MycroftHolmes looked at the possible consequences of some idiot nursing a container of Pringles his entire time on a plane to keep from having to wear a mask
Benevolent Misanthrope wrote an advertisement for rural Alaska
Nuuu wrote a commercial for living in the city ... except during a pandemic
capn' fun talked about ways in which COVID-19 is much worse than the flu

TotalFark Discussion:
Note: This section can only be accessed by TotalFarkers  
Smart: MissFeasance figured out what went wrong with a compliment
Funny: merrillvillain wanted to know one thing about another Farker's injury (thread includes injury pics, but none are gory)
Smart: We Ate the Necco Wafers cheered up a Farker who creeped out a colleague
Smart: meat0918 named the worst movie that was based on a terrible book
Smart: Beeblebrox voiced an opinion on a drink that's not a Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster
Smart: Earguy named a favorite movie musical
Funny: Snaps described life before the invention of the slow cooker

Politics Funny:
markie_farkie argued that you can, in fact, vote twice
thatguyoverthere70 stated the real issue with the ramp leading to the USS NC being covered before Trump's visit
culebra let us know what a woman in the Lake Travis Trump Boat Parade was thinking during a frightening moment
vudukungfu expected Trump's hands to be stronger
nekom remembered back in 1996 when Richard Jewell was suspected of being the Olympic Park bomber

Bonus FarkStaff Pick:
west.la.lawyer adapted a sign to celebrate hump day

Politics Smart:
Raoul Eaton figured out how Seattle could save some money
Ker_Thwap discussed some of the dangers in misreading statistics about COVID-19
markie_farkie argued that you can, in fact, vote twice
Chariset looked at blaming deaths on existing conditions rather than on COVID-19
fragMasterFlash examined Trump's DOJ and DHS investigation into "violent left-wing civil unrest"


Top Contest Entries

Some of the top-voted contest entries from last week, listed from highest number of votes down

Photoshops:
RedZoneTuba made a horny campaign poster
Thrakkorzog got this robot's circuits firing
#2 was ready to start a movement
RedZoneTuba set a trap
Terrapin Bound picked the low-hanging fruit
kabloink found out how stormtroopers spend their vacations
Circusdog320 discovered a curious obelisk
RedZoneTuba got ticked off
RedZoneTuba encountered the mighty cyrus tree
Yammering_Splat_Vector showed us where pugs really come from

Fartist Friday: Happy Accidents - Art projects that came out differently than expected but became Happy Accidents
ruudbob got through a tough time with the help of an accidental demon

This week's Fartist Friday theme, brought to you by E-brake: Make musical art by posting a recording of your own music via a YouTube video, showing off a photo of your instruments, or creating and sharing original art featuring musical notes using ONLY MS Paint/Draw-type programs

Farktography: Pandemic Putterings
Circusdog320 caught a fleeing falcon on film

Farktography is Fark's weekly photography contest. If you would like to suggest a Farktography theme, please contact Elsinore.


Fark Weird News Quiz (brought to you by ox45tallboy)

Another fun time on the Quiz last week, with no one being able to come up with an explanation for the Microwave Onion Cooker available at my local redneck supermarket. On the Quiz itself, Oak cae out on top with 1027, followed by coscausticevil who will join him in the 1000 club with a score of 1018. Blackstone made third with 925, abmoraz was right behind in fourth with 924, and runwiz rounded out the top five with 913.

The hardest question on last week's Hard Quiz was over where to find the Empathy Suite, a custom-designed penthouse that is currently the world's most expensive hotel room at $200,000/night. Only 17% of quiztakers knew you could find this in Las Vegas at the Palms Casino Resort. For comparison, the Royal Suite at the Armani Hotel in Dubai can be had for less than $10,000/night (depending on booking) and the La Paiva Suite in the Maison Souqette in Paris an unbelievable steal at a mere $408/night when I checked this morning. Offer not valid to countries with COVID-19 restrictions still in place.

The easiest question on the Hard Quiz was over which former child actor tweeted out congratulations to himself on his 40th birthday, thereby making all of us feel even older than he's feeling. 84% of quiztakers knew that it was Macauly Culkin who had hit the big 4-0 and didn't want us to forget it. But so that you feel a little younger, Jonathan Taylor Thomas is still 39 and Frankie Muniz is an absolute babyish 34.

The hardest question on last week's Easy Quiz was about "Tasha's Cauldron of Everything". Only 24% of quiztakers knew that this was the title of an upcoming Advanced Dungeons & Dragons supplemental accessory book with new options for character subclasses, group mechanics, and racial traits. Still no infield fly rule, though. Also, Keira Knightly's new AppleTV series is titled "The Essex Serpent", although I'm sure most Farkers would be fine with her in a series called "Tasha's Cauldron of Everything". 

The easiest question on the Easy Quiz dealt with where you can find Carole Baskin this fall. 89% of quiztakers knew that she'd be seen on the new season of "Dancing With the Stars", where her dance partner will no doubt unsuccessfully attempt to have sardine oil banned from the set.

If you missed out on last week's quiz, you can catch up on the Fark Weird News Quiz right here.

Congratulations once again to the winners, and we'll be doing it all again this week.

________________________

A message from Drew Curtis:  
________________________ 

Hey everyone, hope your week went well.

This week's News Meta has been a little strange.  I'm attributing it to the leftover fatigue from the DNC and RNC respectively, both of which required a lot of news coverage.  As well as Falwell Jr. stories, although I'm pleased to report there have been no new pool boys this week.  My favorite story of the week so far was the guy in the jetpack who buzzed a flight inbound to LAX at 3,000 feet.  Incidentally, I texted Adam Savage, who is an avid Farker, to see if he was doing any test flying in his titanium Iron Man suit.  He said he was in San Francisco at the time and has no idea who jetpack man could even be.  If anyone else has any leads, be sure to let us know.

We've got a Fark news livestream coming up at 5 p.m. Eastern today; I'm still putting it together.  It's science-heavy today, for whatever reason.  Join us at 5 p.m. or feel free to check it out later, we've got all the recent livestreams available in our video section on Twitch.

________________________

We now return you to your usual Fark NotNewsletter.
________________________ 


Top Comments

Some of the top-voted smartest and funniest comments from the past week

Funny:
Nadie_AZ knew which class Liberty University students are most eager to attend this semester
OptionC reminded us what the true definition of "marriage" is
west.la.lawyer knew about a popular elective at Liberty University
maxandgrinch discussed the danger posed by Hurricane Laura
Mr. Coffee Nerves hoped "The Batman" would finally shed some light on a missing plot point
Naido figured there was no audience participation after all
Elvis Jagger Abdul-Jabbar pointed out how silly it would be to write your emergency information on an index card with a Sharpie and put it in a bag in your pocket if you're in the path of a hurricane
Fingerware Error wanted to take a science class at Liberty University
Al Roker's Forecast found a company to sell doughnuts that have been glazed 25 times
whither_apophis noticed something truly amazing during news coverage of Hurricane Laura

Smart:
Nadie_AZ knew which class Liberty University students are most eager to attend this semester
xalres asked people to look at what happened to Jacob Blake from another point of view
luna1580 shared what it's like to go without showering for a while
WilderKWight considered an appropriate way to continue including Black Panther in Marvel movies
EvilEgg pointed out that one celebrity was wearing the "Brokini" style long before these guys came along
OldRod discussed a high school's ridiculous policies
W_Scarlet reminded us to not judge the harmless things that make other people happy
WilderKWight had an idea for addressing T'Challa's death in the next movie
Adolf Oliver Nipples thought that police officers should try looking at things differently
JohnnyApocalypse translated a confusing gamer tweet into English for us

CSB Sunday Morning: Goofy memories
Smart: rickythepenguin went to a lot of trouble to see the Grateful Dead
Funny: Ker_Thwap showed that the rules of basketball are simple and finite. Any sports dad would have known

CSB [Cool Story, Bro] Sunday Morning is a thread for Farkers to share true stories from their own lives based on a weekly topic. If you have a topic idea for a CSB Sunday Morning thread, please contact Farkback ahead of time, or just submit it on Saturday afternoon/evening. Please note: While submitted CSB Sunday Morning threads have a high likelihood of being greenlit, there is no guarantee they will be.

TotalFark Discussion:
Note: This section can only be accessed by TotalFarkers  
Funny: JerseyTim described the frustration of trying to advise a spouse who's failing at "taking care of business"
Smart: Badafuco looked at someone feeling smug about making a wisecrack to the ex while paying child support
Smart: meg12279 discussed parents giving up a child because he or she has cognitive and physical disabilities
Smart: brap shared something beautiful
Funny: The Pope of Manwich Village knew the best way to sell your handguns
Funny: unremarkable asterisk wanted to see if Solty Dog's kokeshi tastes good
Funny: merrillvillain forgot what cats are like

Politics Funny:
JulieAzel626 explained why it was actually necessary for a cop to jump up and kick a cooperating man in the back
King Something called a professional to help when the chair of Maryland's delegation to the RNC mentioned two revered "segregationists," Frederick Douglass and Harriet Tubman
scottydoesntknow had inside information about Jerry Falwell Jr.'s resignation
I Have A Bo Burnham GIF For That showed that inclines are hard for a lot of people, not just Donald Trump
Martian_Astronomer discovered that the more we learn about Q, the more questions we have

Politics Smart:
growinthings explained why you don't have to worry that people will turn in fraudulent ballots
Circusdog320 gave an example of how voting by mail or drop-off is verified
Codenamechaz pointed out where some of the confusion about "the economy" comes from
Benevolent Misanthrope defended Trump against accusations that he's taking orders from Putin
king of vegas figured out what would give Trump the lowest TV ratings he's ever had


Top Contest Entries

Some of the top-voted contest entries from last week, listed from highest number of votes down

Photoshops:
kabloink revealed an echo from the past
gaslight heard you like thread badges
Driver refused to reflect on anything
Yammering_Splat_Vector made this chicken a little less frightening, truth be told
kabloink showed that this angry guy has just about had it with this sort of thing
RedZoneTuba figured out what bone spurs actually are
maxandgrinch shared literature about a strong woman who knows what she wants
Herb Utsmelz demonstrated the best thing to do when someone scary tells you to beat it
Yammering_Splat_Vector made things more comfortable for the guy in Driver's Photoshop
Thrakkorzog gave this bird a new play area

Fartist Friday: Create lemony art in honor of "National Lemon Juice Day"
RedZoneTuba showed us that 2020 is just playing a cruel game with us. Be sure to check out the rest of the fun and creative entries.

This week's Fartist Friday theme, brought to you by E-brake:Show & Tell 3: Happy Accidents. Show us an art project that came out differently than expected but became a Happy Accident. All mediums allowed including art programs.  

Farktography:
kittyhas1000legs won Farktography Contest No. 799: "Animal Kingdom 2" with an adorable singing or screaming or yawning squirrel. Make sure you check out the whole thread, especially if you are fond of animals. 

Farktography is Fark's weekly photography contest. If you would like to suggest a Farktography theme, please contact Elsinore.


Fark Weird News Quiz (brought to you by ox45tallboy)

Another great time on last week's Quiz, where we learned that I am not the only Farker who had cinnamon and sugar together in a shaker when I was younger. On the Quiz itself, technomuse comes out on top with an even 1000 and has the sole password to the 1000 Club Zoom Meeting, where we'll be playing all the movies Drew deemed were just too terrible for the Friday Night Movie Night Twitch stream. 4th Horseman made second with 939, and bud jones took third with 930. TheMothership came in fourth with 907, and Autoerotic Defenestration finished out the top 5 with 903.

The hardest question on the Hard Quiz was surprisingly over the newest member of the 12-figure club. Only 36% of quiztakers knew that with Facebook's latest stock surge, Mark Zuckerberg is now worth $100 billion. In the meantime, Jeff Bezos last week hit $200 billion a few months after a $65 billion divorce, so Mark needs to step up his game. I'm guessing his publicist is pushing for a sex tape, so look for that soon.

The easiest question on the Hard Quiz was over how British Airways goes about updating the on-board navigational databases of its fleet of 747's. 87% of quiztakers knew that they still used the original system of 3.5" floppies that came with the planes. No word on if they still play Oregon Trail on their monochrome monitors, but I'm guessing the flight engineers have long made use of the convenient push-button cup holders just below the floppy drive.

The hardest question on the Hard Quiz was a modern pop culture stumper. Only 29% of quiztakers knew that the previous week's debut of "Dynamite" by the K-Pop band BTS had shattered YouTube records for debut viewings, with 3 million concurrent views at the time it went live, and 101 million views in its first 24 hours. By Contrast, "WAP" received "only" 26 million views in its first 24 hours, which is still the record for an all-female collaboration. Perhaps Cardi B should consider pyrotechnics or something in her next video.

The easiest question on the Easy Quiz was about New York City's newest shop dedicated to a single brand of candy. 83% of quiztakers knew that the original "Moon Men" candy became "Sour Patch Kids" in the 1980's for some reason. Probably to associate themselves with the super-popular gross-out Garbage Pail Kids trading cards and Razzie-award-nominated-but-not-winning movie. So thank you to Mondelez International for memorializing this rip-off of a fine cultural touchstone in 80's culture.

If you missed out on last week's Quiz, you can catch up here. Congratulations once again to the winners, and we'll be doing it all again this week.