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Sun July 28, 2019
(4Utah.com)
 
 
 
Utah man and his wife killed in Mexico. His other wife and children remain unharmed
source: abc4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LiveLeak)
 
 
 
Police audition for Smokey and the Bandit sequel
source: liveleak.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bay News 9)
 
 
 
Man blames horse for breaking down yard gate, getting into screened-in porch, through broken window to wander inside house. Neigh way
source: baynews9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Bay Area)
 
NewsFlash
 
Active shooter at Gilroy garlic festival. Update: Three dead, fifteen injured. One suspect shot and killed, one still on the loose. This stinks
source: nbcbayarea.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Canada manhunt update: Search for teen suspects leads only to polar bear
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
American teens decided to play Prisoners' Dilemma Italian Edition. Tag is for the Nash equilibrium
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News West 9)
 
 
 
Officers arrest murder suspect. Wanted description just said "Damn"
source: newswest9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contemporist)
 
 
 
Photoshop this violet vanity
source: contemporist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
"Anyone who pays for more than half of their stuff in self checkout is a total moron"
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Live to ride; Ride to live
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTHR Indianapolis)
 
 
 
If you're going to accuse McDonald's employees of taking a bite out of your sandwich because you're a cop, make sure it wasn't you
source: wthr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Aww how cute a baby alligat....wait, what's that behind you?
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this summer scene
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(English Russia)
 
 
 
I like my ice cream like I like my women ... covered in bees
source: englishrussia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
In this summer's best attempt at keeping a straight face, Wyoming police tell Coloradans not to bring their weed with them when visiting the Land of Lopers and Lassos
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Europe's massive heatwave will now invade Greenland and the Arctic. Hope you enjoyed their glaciers
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Back in the day the Royal Navy didn't have this pregnancy problem when sailors were sailors. If you know what I mean ....and I think you do (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
The ghost of Chris McCandless claims another lost soul
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this family dinner
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Famous Aussie dishlicker-on-tuckerbox statue comes a cropper this arvo; Cootamundra-Gundagai coppers having a butcher's for a bloke and a sheila seen racking off in a Toorak Tractor and suspected of being a few kangaroos short in the top paddock
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
The real reason we invaded Iraq. It's so obvious, when you think about it - (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
I know we quote "This business will get out of control" a lot around here, but you know... [insert Morgan Freeman meme pic] ...he has a point
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(RTL Today)
 
 
 
97-year-old Belgian woman claims the secret to her long life is drinking between 12 to 20 glasses of beer per day. Pffft...amateur
source: today.rtl.lu   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Chicago)
 
 
 
Not Fark: Dolls pulled from stores. WTFarking Fark: black dolls with dreads that were meant to be slammed against walls
source: abc7chicago.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WMUR New Hampshire)
 
 
 
A highway is no place for a 1 horsepower vehicle
source: wmur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Bank robbers likely to be "very frustrated" with their haul of four $5 notes and three security dye packs which covered them in pink ink
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Austin News KXAN)
 
 
 
Texas fire department's new $350k truck destroyed by fire. Firetrucks on fire trifecta in play
source: kxan.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Are you worried that the world will end soon? Well, you can relax, because it already ended in 2012 and this Twitter thread has the proof
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(We Are Central PA)
 
 
 
Headline reads downhill, starting with Taco Seasoning then moving to Walmart, and ending up at Salmonella
source: wearecentralpa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat July 27, 2019
(10 News)
 
 
 
Dockless scooters were such a success at Comic-Con this year that San Diego might ban them
source: 10news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
When riding shotgun on a drive-by shooting remember this important safety tip
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
John McAfee has been released and sent to England, perhaps to the Ecuadorian Embassy with a cat
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Public says new Edmonton Public Library looks like a Soviet version of a crashed Star Wars spaceship. EPL responds with "Welcome to Fark"
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this diver
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Global News (Canada))
 
 
 
Fire truck catches fire while battling a fire and then explodes, adding more fire to the fire that the firetruck was firefighting. Fire
source: globalnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
Lounge chair 0, Florida man 1
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
Want to stop fare beaters? Make public transit free
source: vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Call the poliiiiiiiice
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(South Jersey Courier-Post)
 
 
 
New Jersey town angry over late-night party noise ... booming across the river from Philadelphia
source: courierpostonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Photoshop theme: A day at the beach
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
You're not paranoid. They are trying to get you
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Cases of burnout and patients claiming disability for it are skyrocketing in Sweden, where the stress of sometimes having to work up to 50 hours a week and only getting five weeks of paid vacation a year is taking a gruesome toll. What the børk
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Mass brawl in restaurant on British cruise ship triggered by: A) Brexit discussion; B) Someone trying to jump the queue at the buffet; or C) Passenger dressed as clown. Alcohol may have been involved
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
The weather for Hong Kong has a 100% chance of tear gas
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS New York)
 
 
 
Bear-fisted brawlers
source: newyork.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
What kind of merit badge do they get for this?
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Bring all the Xanax you have when you check in to this proposed gravity-defying Norwegian hotel suspended off of a cliff
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
To be honest, if trying to get out of the Bronx is now a crime, we're going to need a LOT more prisons
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Verge)
 
 
 
So... about that $125 you thought you were getting from Equifax. Yeah, let's read the fine print ... and fire up the Willy Wonka memes
source: theverge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
What hops in Vegas stays in Vegas
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop what made Boris so happy
 
(WTOP)
 
 
 
Man released after being charged with simple assault for pushing an 8 1/2 months pregnant woman in the stomach on a DC sidewalk has been arrested more than 70 times, including 20 sexual assault cases. I guess it's 80 strikes and you're out
source: wtop.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KnoxNews)
 
 
 
Zoo Knoxville is adding either an anteater or two bear cats, and they want you to decide which it should be. With helpful video of a baby giraffe, because Caturday
source: knoxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Forbes)
 
 
 
When prosecuting the largest underage sex trafficking case in recent history, it's probably smart to subpoena the pilots of the infamous "Lolita Express"
source: forbes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(We Are Central PA)
 
 
 
Pennsylvania Man arrested for animal cruelty for removing his pants and taking photos of cats sitting on his genitals. The AristoCats
source: wearecentralpa.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bored Panda)
 
 
 
Meanwhile back at the ranch
source: boredpanda.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Couple will not have to pay the ticket left on their tire-stripped car that was propped up on milk crates. Yep, embarrassing media coverage can sometimes be helpful
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Sir, a sports drink does not replace a broken tail light
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(StudyFinds)
 
 
 
Adults think about sex on average eight times per day, according to a survey of people that evidently sleep 23 out of every 24 hours
source: studyfinds.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Gunfight at the OK corral
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri July 26, 2019
(NBC News)
 
 
 
(non) Giant Meterorite Crashes into Earth
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Wildfires are not just for hot places. Siberia, Scandinavia, Alaska and Greenland want to do their bit for climate change
source: bbc.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Old & Busted: Jetpacks. New Hotness: Web-connected sex toys that let you jack off strangers in other countries. Welcome to the future (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTAE)
 
 
 
Got one of these snow globes but it kept me up all night
source: wtae.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Haven Register)
 
 
 
FAA notices when the same pilot flies his single engine Piper Cub from CT to WV to AR to TX to Northern CA and back to CT, a bunch of times. Yup. It's reefer
source: nhregister.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Syria: oh hai guys, remember us?
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Detroit_News)
 
 
 
"Fabulous beard. But you still need pants"
source: detroitnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
Composer joins forces with pianist to fight Alzheimer's, because the worst thing that can happen to a man is to forget how to use his pianist
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contemporist)
 
 
 
Photoshop this elevated cabin in the woods
source: contemporist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KQED San Francisco)
 
 
 
Police requesting a search warrant neglect to tell the judge it's for the home of a reporter who did a piece using a leaked police report
source: kqed.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Scholars discover a fragment of the medieval Vagina Monologues dating back to the 1300s. Still unable to find the clitoris monologues
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Jersey 101.5)
 
 
 
Tax collector to 106 year old NJ woman: Pay your property taxes or lose your home. NJ residents: We got this
source: nj1015.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Baltimore)
 
 
 
Hey baby, want to go for a ride down the Hershey highway?
source: baltimore.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC 15)
 
 
 
Cosmetics store girls bare their behinds to promote "naked packaging" (story safe for work, but link on page may not be)
source: abc15.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
Dozens killed in the worst market bombing since Pets.com
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this high flyer
source: media1.s-nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
After bizarre chair theft incident, Tim Eyman agrees to pay fine and not commit any criminal violations or go to Office Depot for nine months. To be fair, a sentence of nine months in Office Depot would be enough to scare anyone straight
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Single-wheel vehicle makes illegal lane change, plows into jeep. With video. (Everyone's OK)
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Two less Charlottesville Nazis have lawyers
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Old man and teenager in Delorean are being sought for questioning
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Florida Health Department says Triple E virus detected in Alachua County. Triple H unavailable for comment
source: mycbs4.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Woman's home must be full of gigantic snail trails
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
According to guy who doesn't have sex, gays are born to "moms who like anal sex", which is strangely a very popular category on pornhub. Also, subby always gets his science info from preachers and other superstitious types
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
You might be pleased to hear that Jeffrey Epstein is spending 23 hours a day in a black mold-infested 8ft by 8ft jail cell where inmates wake up with dead rats in their beds
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Traffic Timmy, a city councilman in a St. Louis suburb, tries to harass an African American for parking
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Facebook)
 
 
 
I'm cycling from Manhattan to Buffalo starting Sunday and raising money to fight cancer in the process. Will be wearing a bright purple "F*ck Cancer" jersey the whole way. If you can contribute, link goes to the donation page -Drew
source: facebook.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
"Mummy, iths thtuck" With pic that will follow him well into adulthood
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
It's insanely hot out there. If you leave your dog in a parked car expect ice cream waving, harsh language (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Public Radio International)
 
 
 
And God said to Giant Meteor, "Put a shot across her bow"
source: pri.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Nopeballs (graphic content)
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 35 Orlando)
 
 
 
For those of you looking to storm Area 51, you can now get alien abduction insurance
source: fox35orlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 35 Orlando)
 
 
 
This guy was having problems breathing at night until he set up a camera and found out why. In related news, cats would kill us all if they could
source: fox35orlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
Mayor of town where no boys have been born for 12 years offers reward to next mum to have a son, who will then be held up in front of all the residents by local witch doctor standing on a very high rock
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Toronto Sun)
 
 
 
Size 6 bridezilla puts heavy restrictions on her bridesmaids
source: torontosun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Designers' fails include a Superman water fountain where the drinker swallows
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Atlas Obscura)
 
 
 
When banana peels threatened New York
source: atlasobscura.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
It's not a proper school leaving party until you've laid siege to a police station and tried to bust your friend out of jail
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Single Guy)
 
 
 
Single? Looking for love? Simple: head to Madison, Wisconsin. Want to be left alone? Then Memphis and Bakersfield are your best bets
source: lendingtree.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Zenfs images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this collection on display
source: media.zenfs.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(London Evening Standard)
 
 
 
Wanted man didn't like his first police mugshot, so he offered a more flattering selfie
source: standard.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHNT Huntsville)
 
 
 
Senior drivers are more easily distracted by all the newfangled touch-screen infotainment systems in today's cars. Obvious tag stuffed into rumble seat without a seatbelt
source: whnt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lansing State Journal)
 
 
 
Fifty years ago, a man tried to cross Lake Michigan in a bathtub on a $5 bet. To be fair, some of us spend $5 on sillier things every month
source: lansingstatejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(5 News Fayetteville)
 
 
 
It's so hot 'Brain-Eating Amoeba' season has already started
source: 5newsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Woman in disguise shoots two Israelis in a Chinese restaurant in Mexico City
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Macron tries to please lesbians, get them pregnant
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Newest Yankee Candle scent: Founder's Casket
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Ex-Oxford University employee found guilty of murder in Chicago. Manual of Style spokesman reconfirms they are not involved and that their comma recommendations stand
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
NYPD harass resident for the crime of walking down the street being a Guinea Fowl
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Slate)
 
 
 
Global warming is curing cancer and cirrhosis in France
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News4Jax)
 
 
 
"This is not the 'wild west.'" Of course not, it is Florida
source: news4jax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(City Pages)
 
 
 
Protip: When you give a good online review about a brothel masquerading as a spa, go easy on the details
source: citypages.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WXYZ Detroit)
 
 
 
Good guy with gun shoots a guy over a bag of chips. Fark: The wrong guy
source: wxyz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu July 25, 2019
(PennLive)
 
 
 
You might have a criminal record if you have ever had an overdue library book
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Meet the man behind the fake presidential seal: a disaffected Republican who also happens to be a graphic designer, who "just threw it together" one night. Fark: He believes the choice of his seal was no accident. UltraFark: He's a Farker
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
There's a petition to move Halloween to the last Saturday in October. Because think of the little goblins
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Las Cruces Sun-News)
 
 
 
If you're going to tell the drive-thru guy that God is paying for your lunch, you need to let God know first
source: lcsun-news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Radio.com)
 
 
 
Almost 18 years later, students who returned to lower Manhattan schools after 9/11 are starting to come down with 9/11 related illnesses
source: wcbs880.radio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Minnesota)
 
 
 
Now the damned vapers will have to go freeze outside where they belong
source: minnesota.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Magazine)
 
 
 
Photoshop this cool woman
source: pixel.nymag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Sixteen Mexicans arrested for smuggling drugs and human trafficking.... what? You say it was 16 U.S. Marines? Move along people, absolutely nothing to see here
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
Weeners
 
Today's ready-for-Fark headline: Sex Is Better for Men Who Eat Nuts, Says Study Funded by Big Nut
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Stuff.co.nz)
 
 
 
Pity the website moderator for he has seen the dark soul of mankind, and it is goatse
source: stuff.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Outside Online)
 
 
 
Remember that American missionary who got killed trying to Christianize the North Sentinelese? It'd be easy to dismiss him as a foolish fanatic. Conveniently, it would also be correct
source: outsideonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Unilad)
 
 
 
On the reeboot of Jersey Shore, feral chickens. Also, not that Jersey
source: unilad.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Medical Xpress)
 
 
 
You stay home with a sniffle. This guy has ebola and took his college exam. The only issue was the proctors were distracted by all his clanking
source: medicalxpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
You are locked in a container full of cocaine on the the hottest day ever. Wat do? Better call the cops
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Chicago police apologize for running background checks on anyone who dared to speak at police board meetings
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TownNews)
 
 
 
Photoshop this night sky
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Man falls in the water while trying to cross English Channel on a hoverboard. Marty McFly unavailable for comment
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Elon Musk tried to invent a starship, accidentally made a bigger flamethrower (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KGET Bakersfield)
 
 
 
In the today's episode of 'That's a new one': A man admits to killing his wife by bludgeoning her with a concrete block, said it was a 'mercy killing' as a 'group of powerful men' infected him with mayonnaise
source: kget.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Boston)
 
 
 
Attackity yak: "please stand back"
source: boston.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Today in things you can't do while black: go to church
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Your skeeved-out EEWWW of the day: Victoria's Secret has hired a special team of lawyers to analyze its business relationship with Jeffrey Epstein
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Iowa Neo-nazi arrested for threatening to "slaughter all jews" in calls he made to several Jewish organizations. Seems he was upset about a Youtube video they made that suggested the Norse pagan religion he followed had links to Neo-nazism
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Virginian-Pilot)
 
 
 
Good guy with a gun shoots two armed robbers. "Police have not said whether they plan to charge the bystander"
source: pilotonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
This undead tree stump is being kept alive by neighboring trees, is in negotiations with AMC for its own spin-off show
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 35 Orlando)
 
 
 
147 million Americans can file a claim to get $125 thanks to an Equifax data breach
source: fox35orlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Baltimore Sun)
 
 
 
Door, windshields, mailbox, traffic lanes, alcohol, clothing, and police attempt to create joinder with sovereign citizen
source: baltimoresun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 43 Pennsylvania)
 
 
 
Things not to have with you when meeting your probation officer #4353....stolen dentures
source: fox43.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Mother Teresa's former assistant killed in bar brawl, just like Jesus
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
PSA warning during the UK heatwave: Women please do not to put ice lollies inside your vaginas to combat the heat (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chron)
 
 
 
In Texas, electricity prices are calculated on 15 minute intervals and average around $40 per cycle at this time of year. Computer glitch surges price to $1400 for a 15 second interval costing consumers $245M. Company says sorry, but no refunds
source: chron.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Church tells dying man he can't have his funeral there because his son is gay
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Evansville Courier Press)
 
 
 
Officer Obie unavailable for comment
source: courierpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
School district apologizes for using Border Patrol playbook to resolve school lunch debts
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Breaking: Two homes in Pittsburgh after car goes through them
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC)
 
 
 
Photoshop this tit
source: ichef.bbci.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Boston.com)
 
 
 
Parking official arrested for stealing $1300 in quarters. Official admits to crime, but insists that he's now a changed man
source: boston.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Scottish Sun)
 
 
 
Fark-ready headline: Horrifying moment 'zombie' chicken breast 'comes back to life and crawls off dining table' as diner screams in terror
source: thescottishsun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Not content with Iran stealing all the thunder of potentially tempting the nuclear dynamite monkey into WW3, Ukraine seizes a Russian oil tanker
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Average Guy)
 
 
 
#1 thing women look for in a man: a nice smile. #2 is average size. And yes, we're talking about what you think we're talking about
source: helloclue.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Violent, racist nazi upset that Portlanders treat him like a violent, racist nazi
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGNO)
 
 
 
'In New Orleans, a horse on the force can dance, of course.'
source: wgno.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
How a French automaker sabotaged Nazi wartime transportation with this one weird trick
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Scientific consensus proves global warming is real and will kill us
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Boeing should just rebrand the plane the 737 "Scareliner"
source: edition.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZ Family)
 
 
 
Don't you hate it when someone you met on the internet agrees to let you film him peeing in a Walmart bathroom and describes what he'll be wearing, but when you show up there's a kid dressed just like that so you film him anyways? Yeah, me too
source: azfamily.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHAM Rochester)
 
 
 
Didn't fix the cable, but they did get the spider
source: 13wham.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
A hobosexual is someone who dates you simply to have a place to sleep
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Air Canada thinks a wheelchair bound grandmother would like to hook up with dude half her age, get them hotel room together
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Seattle Times)
 
 
 
Amanda Knox takes a stab at asking the public to pay for her wedding
source: seattletimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 742: "Signs 3: Everywhere a Sign". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Dear Donnie, 150 years is a long time so please help out a fellow billionaire. Love, Bernie
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed July 24, 2019
(KSAT San Antonio)
 
 
 
The sun, and seat, go down on Barney Smith
source: ksat.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Jeffrey Epstein might have tried to cheat justice by attempting suicide in his cell. Death said, "not today"
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
And I only went into that whorehouse to make sure nobody was having any sex
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Pro tip: If you are planting your miniature video camera to record wildlife, you might want to leash it (video)
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Sky.com)
 
 
 
Best Korea has resumed its conflict with Poseidon
source: news.sky.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop everything that could go wrong with this picture
source: images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Republican lawmaker complains to Mueller that Faux News wasn't cited as much as two investigative newspapers, the WaPo and NYT, in his report. Chris Wallace cries in his empty newsroom
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
Darwin: 1 Complete Idiot: 0
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WLTX Columbia)
 
 
 
Cold fries, hot lead
source: wltx.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patheos)
 
 
 
Christians: We are the most persecuted group in the world
source: friendlyatheist.patheos.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Michigan: the Florida of the north?
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
A family that alerted the FBI to their son's increasingly extremist white nationalist views and social media posts after the Tree of Life Synagogue shooting gets to avoid awkward Thanksgiving dinners for up to 10 years
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Fake service animal gives flight attendant real stitches
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Advocate)
 
 
 
Voguing is now a competive sport at Emerson College, you can thank the gays
source: advocate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Business Insider)
 
 
 
The Munchkin says Amazon is destroying retail in America. Where was he when Walmart came into town and destroyed the local mom and pops?
source: markets.businessinsider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Folks)
 
 
 
Photoshop these Brazil nuts
source: tambopatalodge.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daytona Beach News-Journal)
 
 
 
Good news: You won $20,000 in the lottery Bad news: You need twice that to bail out when you're busted hours later for heroin and fentanyl. The Florida tag, ladies and gentlemen
source: news-journalonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Meanwhile, in Canada, two lifelong friends who "liked to go into the woods and play war" are living their best lives as murder suspects on the run from the Mounties in remote northern Manitoba
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Omaha World Herald)
 
 
 
It is hot in France, says our correspondent in Germany (with helpful photo of Belgium)
source: omaha.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
Not content with engaging secret US base security forces and aliens, there's now an event to storm Loch Ness
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Rivaroxaban, adalimumab, empagliflozin. Tired of tongue-twisting drug names? Blame two women in Chicago
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Variety)
 
 
 
I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die
source: variety.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Ireland's postal service celebrates Apollo 11 with stamp commemorating "50th Anniversary of the First Landing on the Irish"
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FOX6Now)
 
 
 
Nike's rare "Moon Shoe" is sold for $437,500, shattering the auction record for sneakers. Will be fitted with solid gold Odor Eaters
source: fox6now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGNO)
 
 
 
New Orleans residents fed up with pothole plant corn and watermelons in it, add scarecrow
source: wgno.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 59)
 
 
 
'Toilets appear in Hope residents' front yards as part of bizarre fundraiser to 'flush away hunger''
source: fox59.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Times Union)
 
 
 
DMV, Planned Parenthood find their office building all shot up, with no idea which of them the gunman was aiming at
source: timesunion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WBAL Baltimore)
 
 
 
Why we can't have nice things #54765125: thieves burgle book bank van. What's next, snatch-and-grab meals on wheels?
source: wbal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this high liar
source: bilbaobizkaiacard.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Some police dogs sniff out drugs or bombs. But this week's Woofday Wetnose Wednesday heroes are these police dogs who just help people through the bad moments. Stories about your dog helping you through bad times to the right
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WQAD Quad Cities)
 
 
 
Baby abandoned at apartment complex. Florida: Again
source: wqad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
"Should I have let my daughter marry our robot?"
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Let's take a look at YouTube's plan to combat conspiracy channels on the site. Spoiler alert: It's failing. Bigly
source: huffpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 31 Denver)
 
 
 
Bear tries to break into pot shop dumpster, steals it instead. "He's all into the Rocky Mountain high and I don't blame him. He knows the good stuff when he sees it, or smells it"
source: kdvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Bulwark)
 
 
 
Then they came for the U.S. citizens
source: thebulwark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(People Magazine)
 
 
 
Two dogs want steak after helping retrieve an old stick in the mud
source: people.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
If you go to a community hospital for a serious heart problem, they just might not do as good of a job as a more experienced university hospital. Even if you're Neil farking Armstrong
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Unicef)
 
 
 
When straw bans and carbon credits aren't doing enough for pollution reduction it's time to break out the big guns, that's right...modern ballet
source: unicef.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Gazette (Schenectady))
 
 
 
It might seem like a good idea to stash your drugs behind those nearby trees after you roll your car, but just know, one of the witnesses to your crash might be a state police investigator
source: dailygazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Bull)
 
 
 
Yellowstone is not a petting zoo, mmkay?
source: buckrail.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
Brooklyn woman single-handedly fixes massive Long Island Expressway flooding problem by using a highway cone to unclog sewer grates. In gratitude, city government considers forgoing the customary fines and beatdowns
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
A man with 70 previous convictions, 14 for assault, and who served 8 months in jail for randomly attacking a man is back in jail, only 48 hours after his release, for throwing coffee on a baby
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Emissions from wind turbine have been partially contained
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Journalist pretends that Journalism Robots haven't already arrived
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Morning Call)
 
 
 
PA business man offers to pay kids' school lunch fee debts. School superintendent: GTFO
source: mcall.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Unilad)
 
 
 
Let's face it. No one expected this marriage to last
source: unilad.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue July 23, 2019
(Motor 1)
 
 
 
Cadillac parked in same spot for 25 years is finally towed. Difficulty: it was parked in Brooklyn. Bonus: Even movie producers couldn't move it
source: motor1.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Photography Guy)
 
 
 
Sixty-two years ago a set of marriage photos in Philly were confiscated by a store manager as "inappropriate." An employee kept the prints. The owners may still be alive. Internet, do your thing
source: thephiladelphiacitizen.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(IOL.co.za)
 
 
 
Two thieves take Rail Simulator to the next level
source: iol.co.za   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The New York Times)
 
 
 
The eggs are listening. I repeat, the eggs are listening
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Right-wing local news anchor at Phoenix Fox station who dropped F-bomb during stream is back on the air, because Fox
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Emu kid escapes, combs feathers long on one side of its beak, thought to be at Flock of Seagulls concert
source: huffpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Wherein the use of Nickelback on US state department employees has been denounced as a violation of the Geneva Conventions
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(C|Net)
 
 
 
John McAfee is missing and probably being detained by authorities is the cover story the Lizard People want you to believe
source: cnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Medical Xpress)
 
 
 
Life got you down, no direction, hard to focus? Drop some acid
source: medicalxpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: Want to know what's really hot right now?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Brian the Dog)
 
 
 
Don Jr. wrote a book. Or someone else wrote it for him. Either way.. you know what to do
source: images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
If you get into a scuffle with a homeowner while robbing his house, try to get away quickly but don't leave your motel room key behind
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9 News)
 
 
 
Mayoral candidate submits for reference a climate change study. From Finland.. Authored by Tyler Durden. Can't wait to see the plan for the financial debt resolutions
source: 9news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
"You know how occasionally you drive by a lane closure and think 'Great. NO WORK IS HAPPENING'? There is a reason for that closure. Often that reason is wet concrete"
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(History Channel)
 
 
 
On this day in history, in 1914, Austria-Hungary responds to the assassination of Archduke Ferdinand by issuing an ultimatum to Serbia and developing a plan for a short, decisive military conflict. Narrator: which didn't work out so well
source: history.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Patch)
 
 
 
♫ Shank you for being a friend ♫
source: patch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 35 Orlando)
 
 
 
Hey, look, it's the "ball pits are a sea of germs and bacteria" article again
source: fox35orlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 7 Austin)
 
 
 
"He came in just like any clothed customer, he wasn't being obnoxious or trying to get attention in any other way other than being naked"
source: fox7austin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Things you can't do while black: wedding proposal edition
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Martha's Vineyard Times)
 
 
 
A rare northern sighting of Florida Men on Chappaquiddick involves a failed mating ritual of drinking and driving, and randomly shouting "Donald Trump" and "Mary Jo Kopechne" at other tourists
source: mvtimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Naked French people are whining that their nakedness and their naked experience is being ruined by ... people nakedly leering (NSFW due to French derrieres)
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LAD Bible)
 
 
 
That last thing you want to hear while Bungee jumping is OH SNAP
source: ladbible.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Soldering)
 
 
 
Photoshop these helping "hands"
source: d1t93a3wf86y05.cloudfront.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Orange County firefighter arrested on voyeurism charges. Emphasis on 'Orange' (mugshot)
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Schadenfreude of the day: Good Christian evangelical author of purity and abstinence separates from wife
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Detroit_News)
 
 
 
"He claimed the latter move was a 'relaxation treatment' he performed on all patients"
source: detroitnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News4Jax)
 
 
 
Actual Headline: Florida man goes off on 'wet floor' sign after getting carded for beer
source: news4jax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CTV News)
 
 
 
*Ingredients of Happy Fun Ball include an unknown glowing green substance which fell to Earth, presumably from outer space.*
source: ctvnews.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
"Switch Malfunction Just Start of Problems for MTA on Monday's Evening Commute." Especially the switch the public uses to whip the MTA when it farks up. That switch is malfunctioning badly
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
$115,000 anti-crime toilet installed in park. Because it may be the potty that we deserve, but not the potty we need right now
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Vogue: Should we not have used the anniversary of the Manson murders and Sharon Tate's murder as the inspiration for a 60s revival makeup trend? Was that wrong?
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Nature)
 
 
 
How a data detective exposed suspicious medical trials while passing gas
source: nature.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(EurekAlert)
 
 
 
Canned laughter works, finds a new study of 'dad jokes'
source: eurekalert.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS 58 Milwaukee)
 
 
 
Road rage, Florida style. Difficulty: Wisconsin. Yes, Virginia, there is video goodness
source: cbs58.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bay News 9)
 
 
 
"The cast member asked the woman stop pushing the buttons, warning her the buttons could affect the ride. When the woman refused to listen, the cast member pushed the woman's hand away and was punched in the face"
source: baynews9.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
DC Metro transit cop encounters out of control autistic 4-year-old on station platform and saves the day
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 40 Sacramento)
 
 
 
'Four deputies were injured and a sheriff's horse was punched when a fight broke out during a busy night at the Stanislaus County Fair.'
source: fox40.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
And I heard a voice in the midst of the four beasts and I looked, and behold a pale horse and his name that sat on him was death, and hell followed with him (not safe for work)
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Whatever - Scalzi)
 
 
 
UltraFarker John Scalzi took a Lyft 300 miles when Hertz fell through. Here's a write-up of the experience
source: whatever.scalzi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Worst performance ever of "The Nutcracker"
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Scottish Sun)
 
 
 
American Airlines passenger smashes laptop over boyfriend's head after catching him eyeing up other women on packed plane
source: thescottishsun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Cheez-It partnering with a box wine company to sell a "wine and Cheez-It" box in an effort to corner the "self-hating consumer" market
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
If you're going to visit strip club, don't leave your very young children at home. Isn't that right, Florida Man?
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Scottish Sun)
 
 
 
Woman with rare condition that makes her orgasm uncontrollably 'climaxed during Shania Twain concert'
source: thescottishsun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Detroit gets around to DNA testing a rape kit 20 years later, and the man whose DNA matched is convicted of rape. Open and shut case right? Not quite, the victim was his HS girlfriend but they didn't recognize each other because, 20 years later
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
"Prime recreation spots could be altered by Arizona wildfire." Gee, you think?
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pix11)
 
 
 
New trend in New York City is for groups of people to throw buckets of water on NYPD cops as they arrest someone. Cops unsure if they should arrest the people or thank them for the brief cooling off in the hellhole that is NYC in the summer
source: pix11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 5 San Diego)
 
 
 
San Diego impounds 2,500 scooters during Comic-Con weekend, charges companies $65 per scooter to get them back, stops thousands of accidents caused by Slave Leias rolling down the sidewalk
source: fox5sandiego.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Fox 8 Greensboro)
 
 
 
Santa app sends inappropriate messages to 8-year-old girl. 'The messages started out with a "hey" and "heart" before "It automatically went to Santa asking, 'what are you wearing?'"
source: myfox8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
New Iggy Azalea music video has her swearing 83 times, twerking at children and wearing four different wigs. Critics outraged that she wears four different wigs
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this sunset
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Add "corn sweat" to the list of things that can kill you
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Russia testing South Korean air defenses. This business will get out of control. It will get out of control and we will be lucky to live through it
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
43-ton truck crosses bridge good for 14 tons. Guess what happens next
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Scottish Sun)
 
 
 
"Hey f*** face. You've been invited to our motherf***ing wedding"
source: thescottishsun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Good.is)
 
 
 
Tree-planting drones are firing 'seed missiles' into barren ground to combat the climate crisis. I, for one, welcome our new Ent overlords
source: good.is   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Find moar rare urfs
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS News)
 
 
 
Cruise ship could have "done a million things" to prevent toddler's death. Suspiciously, "preventing grandpa from holding the child in the first place" was not on the list
source: cbsnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Chechen boy completes 4,618 press-ups in one go to set two world records. Is now ready to challenge Apollo Creed's grandson for the title
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Rolling Stone)
 
 
 
A year inside Brooklyn's homicide squad, though it's nowhere near as good as David Simon's expose of the Baltimore homicide squad
source: rollingstone.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Canberra Times)
 
 
 
If you're driving around with $200m worth of drugs in your van, it's even more important to follow the rules of the road. Also, try to avoid crashing into parked police cars
source: canberratimes.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Attorney pleads guilty to parachuting off of courthouse, sentenced to 100 hours of shoveling dog crap. Or, as your ex-wife's attorney calls it, an unproductive week of billing
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Riverfront Times)
 
 
 
World Naked Bike Ride cyclists in St. Louis attacked by paintball gunman (w/video)
source: riverfronttimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(YouTube)
 
 
 
Guy on Harley Davidson chopper crosses 5 lanes of traffic on I-35 in Dallas during rush hour. Excuse me, did I say chopper? I meant rental e-scooter
source: youtube.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Remains found behind a grocery store cooler are identified as those of an employee missing for 10 years. For the love of God, Montresor
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Major Detroit restaurant group lays off all 150 employees on Saturday night via email, other businesses immediately step-in and guarantee that every single one of them remains employed
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Smithsonian Magazine)
 
 
 
The first meal eaten on the moon was bacon. Your argument is invalid
source: smithsonianmag.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Canadian authorities believe a serial killer is on the loose, and he's not that polite
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
95-year-old WWII vet traveling across America on foot in bid to bring historical warship back to Normandy. In related story, my teenage daughter crawled out of bed in time for dinner
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Out on the road today, I saw a Goodwill tchotchke on a Badillac
source: inquirer.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KING 5 News)
 
 
 
Just walking around downtown while black gets police and news helicopters on you in Bellevue, WA
source: king5.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lawrence Journal-World)
 
 
 
Nothing says winner like a face tattoo that says "Sinner", and the grease theft is just the cherry on the Stupid Sundae
source: www2.ljworld.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
3-way leads to 12 our police standoff. Sure it's not what the article actually says, but it's implied
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Peoria Journal Star)
 
 
 
Shoot, a fella could have a pretty good weekend in Vegas with all that stuff
source: pjstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon July 22, 2019
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Things to do while waiting to raid Area 51. Can't miss the Sci-Fi brothel - Queue 'thatsmyfetish.jpg'
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC Action News)
 
 
 
Neighborhood forms human blockade to protect family from ICE agents
source: abcactionnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this winter scene
source: blog.stanis.ru   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
Paul's Memory Bank, OTR edition is taking the night off. Random OTR (CBS Mystery Theater) on tonight in its place
source: tunein.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mental Floss)
 
 
 
Chernobyl is now officially a tourist destination
source: mentalfloss.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Images of the captured British-flagged crew released. Everyone seems to be fairly OK. Bonus: no planks
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kare11)
 
 
 
Residents who have never seen an episode of Scooby Doo are upset that city is removing a walking path near a set of Indian burial mounds
source: kare11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Georgia police pose as construction workers to bust drivers using their cellphones. All they needed was a sailor and Indian and they would have been the Village People
source: nydailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Green Bay Press Gazette)
 
 
 
Thousands of Wisconsinites in the dark. Also, they'll be without power for a couple of days
source: greenbaypressgazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
In a time of historically low unemployment, employers in many states are having a difficult time finding workers who practice advanced witchcraft
source: finance.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this jellyfish of unusual size
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
There's rage, and there's "drive to your kid's summer camp and pepper spray the camp nurse" rage
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Drive)
 
 
 
If you see Black Hawk helicopters flying around DC, it's not the coke talking - they're real (this time)
source: thedrive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Five ways to tell if you're officially burned out at work and not just because you're reading this at work on a Monday
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kent Online)
 
 
 
It's not only cars that are the victims when renegade trees suddenly leap out in front of then the driver least expects it. Now they've started targeting innocent trains as well
source: kentonline.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
Giuliani warns that the Epstein case could implicate far more than 9 - 11 prominent people
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
With Indian cities running out of water they launch a satellite looking for water. Farked: On the moon
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Dozens injured after pro-democracy protesters in Hong Kong were attacked by "an armed mob" that just happened to be made up of young, military-aged men with similar short haircuts who all seemed to be dressed almost exactly alike
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
In the grand scheme of things, there's never anything wrong with bringing in an expert to give a talk on a subject. Unless that subject is child sexual abuse, and the expert got his knowledge firsthand
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 New York)
 
 
 
Texas officer responds to noise complaint from party in the most Texas way possible
source: abc7ny.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Peoria Journal Star)
 
 
 
Church moves into former swinger club, giving "love thy neighbor..." a whole new meaning
source: pjstar.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
"Awwww, it's so cute that you take your Grandfather out for coffee." "Um, this is my husband"
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mirror.co.uk)
 
 
 
So just how is wearing a low-cut top a safety issue if you're flying on a plane?
source: mirror.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(UPI)
 
 
 
Who knew Venezuela has jets
source: upi.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun (Ireland))
 
 
 
Mega-storm due to hit California soon, will turn it into a 300-mile long ocean. The good news is it's going to stay attached to the mainland
source: thesun.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
Video
 
"It is not known why the dinosaur was running down the road, but police did eventually catch up with it"
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Something)
 
 
 
Photoshop this monster flower
source: i.redd.it   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(EurekAlert)
 
 
 
Booze-related ED visits are up 175% for 25- to 29-year-olds, but they're Canadian, so you probably don't know them
source: sciencesources.eurekalert.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Conversation)
 
 
 
How to stroke a cat, according to science. You know, just in case you were wondering
source: theconversation.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Metro)
 
 
 
But how did the prisoners get chainsaws?
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(GoFundMe)
 
 
 
Finally, someone endeavors to send an expedition of flat Earth believers to find the "edge." Let the entertainment begin
source: gofundme.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Komo)
 
 
 
Morton police officer resigns after being arrested for his second DUI. Next time, stick to doughnuts
source: komonews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
To combat high rate of teen suicide, Oregon joins civilized world, allows students to take "mental health days" just as they would take normal sick days
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SanDiego UnionTribune)
 
 
 
Isolated mountain town is isolated
source: sandiegouniontribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Don't drink the agua-vit
source: news.yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
Pedestrians struck in the tender loins by Tesla driver
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Telegraph)
 
 
 
I have no idea what ewe are talking about, so here are some sheep dyed pink
source: telegraph.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Ready for the Worst.Song.Ever? Here's a musical earwig which will haunt you for the rest of your days. Ladies and gentlemen, put your hands together (with your ears in between) and give a lukewarm Farkster welcome to... Gnesa. La, La, La, La, La, La
source: poets.media   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Software company specializing in targeting violent extremism will target dangerous, extremist anti-vaxxer propaganda
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mother Jones)
 
 
 
If you do one thing right in your life, ensure it's this: Always tip the delivery driver in cash
source: motherjones.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
And now for the often ignored Drunken Lesbians for Trump contingency. Oh dear
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSTU FOX 13)
 
 
 
As god as my witness, I didn't know turkeys could be burglars
source: fox13now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gizmodo)
 
 
 
Royal Canadian Mounted Police apologize for livestreaming press conference on murder of an American woman and Australian man with an augmented reality "cat filter" turned on (w/pics)
source: gizmodo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
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