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Sun July 14, 2019
(Yahoo)
 
 
 
The wonderful thing about Tiggers is Tiggers are wonderful things, 'til a Tigger shows up with RABIES and the painful shot that it brings. Christopher Robin wanted for questioning
source: yahoo.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Ms. Sadie Roberts Joseph, an African American activist and founder of the African American Museum in Baton Rouge, found murdered in the back of a trunk
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Root)
 
 
 
Not news: White security guard pulls gun on "suspicious" black guy. News: Black guy is a cop in full uniform. Fark: Security guard is actually charged for once
source: theroot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop these welcome swallows
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Gazette (Schenectady))
 
 
 
Speeding can cost you more than just your license. For this driver, it cost him 179 pounds of marijuana
source: dailygazette.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Modern travelers insist on the cheapest rates for airplane seats, hotels, and meals. Yet modern travelers are also outraged that they're not treated like royalty when they travel. Is it time to accept that modern travelers are very stupid people?
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Jalopnik)
 
 
 
Sacramento County, guardian of all that is noble and just, heroically stops a vile menace most deplorable - namely, you verminous scum working on your cars in your own garages
source: jalopnik.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MPR News)
 
 
 
Don't all families have that eccentric great-great uncle who left a weird painting or bad taxidermy or a homemade diving bell somewhere around the house?
source: mprnews.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contemporist)
 
 
 
Photoshop this red spiral staircase
source: contemporist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Columbia Daily Tribune)
 
 
 
White bartender's reaction to a black customer trying to use a discount card? Did he A) call the cops, B) call the cops, or C) call the cops?
source: columbiatribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Ric Romero, Captain Obvious and Sherlock Holmes raise their glasses and toast together with a rousing chorus of "Duhhhhhhhh"
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Insider)
 
 
 
Wedding photographers really hate the competition. The unpaid competition, to be exact
source: insider.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Llama Guy)
 
 
 
You kiss your llama with that mouth?
source: bclocalnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Do You Remember)
 
 
 
Somehow we all survived growing up in a world filled with Jarts, Cabbage Patch Snacktime Dolls, Clackers, Aquadots, Mini Hammocks, and Swing Wings
source: doyouremember.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Contemporist)
 
 
 
Photoshop the interior of this glass house
source: contemporist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Llama Guide)
 
 
 
A guide to handling your llama. This is important. This means something
source: veterinary-practice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(PennLive)
 
 
 
Man seeks DNA testing of nunchucks and other evidence in effort to clear himself of 1986 murder. Michelangelo wanted for questioning
source: pennlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
"Leeeeeroy Jenkinnns!"
source: www-m.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
UC Berkeley's students de-stress with the help of a) drugs, b) sex, c) llamas
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Trib)
 
 
 
Chicago fines seven scooter companies, and not just for looking stupid
source: chicagotribune.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Nobody likes a thief, except this one (NSFW language)
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Teachers, got a rowdy classroom? Bring in a no-drama llama
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Age (Melbourne))
 
 
 
Australia may not have much gun violence, but it's overrun with pre-schoolers armed with matches and knives. Sleep well, citizens
source: theage.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Sat July 13, 2019
(CBS Los Angeles 2)
 
 
 
This place has it all- hardwood floors, upgraded gourmet kitchen and scenic views that are to die for
source: losangeles.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Llama on the lam-a
source: kamloopsmatters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 10 Albany)
 
 
 
Llama walk with me
source: news10.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Huffington Post)
 
 
 
Wimbledon Centre Court should be a paradise for pigeons, with all the lawn seed and food rubbish. But it isn't, because of Rufus
source: huffpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Providence Journal)
 
 
 
Don't let your llama hang out with whales
source: providencejournal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Streetsblog)
 
 
 
NYPD tries to run over a cyclist because he was driving recklessly, failed to yield to llama
source: nyc.streetsblog.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Heavy)
 
 
 
New York City in the midst of a big power ou
source: heavy.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Tumblr)
 
 
 
Photoshop this train crew
source: 66.media.tumblr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Llama Guy)
 
 
 
It's Saturday night, modmins are out drinking, so here's a story that involves llamas and Fortnite and we really have no idea what it's about, but hey...llamas
source: dexerto.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
 
 
The heat of the moment could cause melting glaciers that would destabilize Asia, though only time will tell if it will happen
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Distractify)
 
 
 
Photoshop this cashier
source: media.distractify.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Apartment for sale in London. It's a bit cozy at 900 square feet. Sorry, my bad, 90 square feet
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Angela's friend learned something about bears yesterday (with video)
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Forbes)
 
 
 
Yeah, there's some pioneering space science going on here, but mainly - we fired a gun at an asteroid. That'll learn it
source: forbes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Well, the optics on this surely look good
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Tennessee: Hey, here's an idea. Maybe if we ban internet-ordained ministers from performing weddings, that will stop the gays from getting married
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cape Breton Post)
 
 
 
Tod-eh's Fark-ready headline: CBU instructor fired after demanding sex, moose meat and lobster for better grades
source: capebretonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News.com.au)
 
 
 
25 years ago, Disney planned the perfect community of Celebration, FL. It turned out so skeevy it creeps out Australians
source: news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop these dancing lizards
source: s3.amazonaws.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Barry plans to add insult to injury for already super-soaked Gulf Coast. Local Farkers stay safe ... and check in to let us know what's going on
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(hawaii magazine.com)
 
 
 
Cats + coffee = Caturday
source: hawaiimagazine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Live Science)
 
 
 
Australia is home to numerous deadly creatures, one of which is responsible for a body count in the billions every year. It's...cats? Really?
source: livescience.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Sex on the Beach, it's not just for drinking anymore (probably NSFW, even blurred)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The BarkPost)
 
 
 
Farmer converts car into enormous sheepdog to honor dead pup and herd sheep. Sheep happy that the farmer's New Zealand cousin is still alive
source: barkpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AZCentral)
 
 
 
Lester Payne bought a disabled veteran's mobile home for a few thousand dollars over a $236 tax debt. He then proceeded to offer to sell it back for $30k before deciding to evict him. Lester Payne also has a criminal record. Lester Payne
source: azcentral.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
When you live in a city, it really gets into your heart
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Open your car door without checking first, and send a cyclist falling under a dump trucks tires to be crushed to death? That'll be $81 CAD please; or $62 USD for the farkers who can't convert from metric
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Old and busted: paying troops enough for them to feed their families. New hotness: troops' families avoiding starvation by going to food banks
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(I Heart Radio)
 
 
 
"American Pickers" finds, restores Aerosmith's original touring van. "Walk this way," they were reported as saying (Hero tag is for the Pickers)
source: 989kkzx.iheart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Scientific American)
 
 
 
Actual article at Scientific American: "Fat is not the problem--Fat Stigma is." And you know it's right, since it's by Doctor Bacon
source: blogs.scientificamerican.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Well I guess that'll teach her for going to the bathroom early in the morning
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Fri July 12, 2019
(Merriam-Webster)
 
 
 
Just in time for the weekend, 17 of the finest words for drinking. Come for the antifogmatic, stay for the Crapulous Clouds
source: merriam-webster.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
And YOU get a road, and YOU get a road, and YOU get a road, and EVERYBODY GETS A ROAD
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Gambler doesn't know when to walk away, embezzles $22 million instead
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
At least the world can look to the Mounties as dedicated servants of justice ... aw crap
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
As excuses for ramming a cop car go this is at least...uh...honest (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Register)
 
 
 
Facebook devises an even faster way to spy on you and whore out your personal details
source: theregister.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Woman attacked, witnesses blame her outfit (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Find the police chief's unattended firearm in the bathroom and return it before a child can take it? Enjoy getting charged for possession of stolen property
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Photoshop this spaghetti
source: ginkandgasoline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
Where there's smoke, there's fire, but where there's smoke and smoke detectors there may not be actual alarms, if you have one of these
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(OK Whatever)
 
 
 
Man chops off foot after lifetime of hating it. Lies to everyone (including wife) & says it was an accident. A decade later, he decides to tell a journalist about it. Then has doubts & ghosts her. Too late though. She already got the story
source: okwhatever.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Investigation underway after man's body found behind AutoZone, mostly as it's just a car parts store and not a body shop
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
New study shows that Washington D.C. area commuters can be classified into four general groups: assholes, morons, halfwits, and lemmings. Well, it doesn't actually name those four; you have to read between the lines
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
As evidence we may be living inside a James Bond movie now, the American molecular biologist who was also a black belt in Karate whose body was found in a Nazi bunker in Crete, was apparently tortured to death, possibly by local neo-Nazis
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
Have a peek at Epstein's Pedophile Isle (from a safe distance)
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Complex)
 
 
 
It's been 15 minutes and 30 seconds, but Angry Bagel Man is still trying to explain what a great guy he is
source: complex.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Dumbass racist boys who vandalized their high school want everyone to know they aren't racists, just dumbasses
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
Man breaks into a church, cuts himself splattering blood all over, trips an alarm, before finally being held at gunpoint by the pastor until cops arrive, praise Jesus
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Eye)
 
 
 
Photoshop this barreleye
source: vignette1.wikia.nocookie.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGAL 8)
 
 
 
U.S. Postal Service truck makes special delivery from overpass to street below
source: wgal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 43 Pennsylvania)
 
 
 
Well that's one way to get attention
source: fox43.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
New, more agile robots are assuming control over complex human handjobs. Wait, what?
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Detroit Free Press)
 
 
 
Symptoms may include explosive diarrhea
source: freep.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
If you live in NYC, don't even bother locking your door. Someone has the key now
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Quartz)
 
 
 
Crazy Eyes really are a thing after all
source: qz.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
FBI investigating rogue deputy group, proving the importance of having at least one fighter or cleric at every sheriff's station
source: abc7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Not news: Cops stop for donuts. Total Fark-o-rama: random guy jumps in the cop car while they're gone and does donuts in the Krispy Kreme car park (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
"Every year, on a mid-May weekend, the US Coast Guard and the Royal Navy hold a ceremony on a portion of Ocracoke Island that is permanently leased to England, a tiny patch of land where four English sailors are buried"
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
MMA in Russia sounds awesome. And scary. And dangerous. Much like everything there
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
The U.S. is winning the culture war in Iran. Results of actual war TBD
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(History Channel)
 
 
 
On this day in history, in 1943, one of the largest ever tank battles took place as Russian forces defeated Hitler's Tiger Tanks at Prokhorovka, marking a turning point in World War 2 and demonstrating why you never try to fight with an army of cats
source: history.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
I wonder if the bear is thinking that he should buy a boat
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Little boy has rare condition named for him. How rare? Nobody else has it, and they don't even know why. I could use the sad tag, but when you defy the odds like this, you earn the hero tag
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deadspin)
 
 
 
Grayson Allen proved that he didn't learn anything by playing in the D-League most of last year. Duke sucks
source: deadspin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Finland hosts heavy metal knitting championship to the music of Purl Jam
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTKR)
 
 
 
Sea lice stinging Virginia Beach swimmers. Some vibrio ought to clear that right up
source: wtkr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Now on Airbnb: Hunter S. Thompson's Woody Creek cabin, complete with his red IBM Selectric typewriter. Customers must supply their own dozen pink grapefruit, case of Wild Turkey, and pair of Latvian wolverines in spangly mini-leotards
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Brush fires are happening all over Maui. Thousands of Hawaiians at risk of bad hair day are evacuating. UPDATE: Evacuees now returning to their homes
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 43 Pennsylvania)
 
 
 
Man facing DUI charges after attempting to convince neighbors he had time machine, was from the future. 'During his arrest, police also noted that he was found to be in possession of a small baggie of white powder.'
source: fox43.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Pix11)
 
 
 
Seattle hit by 4.7 earthquake. Lawn chairs knocked over. We will rebuild
source: pix11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Now might not be a good time to visit South Africa
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Hill)
 
NewsFlash
 
Alexander Acosta quits job as Secretary of Labor after defending sex slavery failed to create jobs
source: thehill.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
Despite U.S. warnings, Russian missile systems land in Turkey. Luckily nothing like this has ever happened before
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
You people need to lose some weight
source: marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MEL Magazine)
 
 
 
You know the names...you know the legends Now hear a first-person account of the founding of the greatest sport in sports history - TAZER BALL
source: melmagazine.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
Photoshop this sad Hello
source: ei.marketwatch.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Aeon.co)
 
 
 
A bunch of people back in the 1700s realized capital punishment really isn't that great of an idea. You know, back when the public actually had to watch it rather than being totally insulated and coddled from the concept
source: aeon.co   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
A conveyor belt of stupid
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
Little League baseball game called on account of A) rain, B) obnoxious parents, or C) fish flies
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bored Panda)
 
 
 
George es un mentiroso
source: boredpanda.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(AP News)
 
 
 
Now might not be a good time to visit NOLA
source: apnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
If you've recently lost a leg at Coney Island, please contact the NYPD
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Farkin' around at The Red Yeti, Friday, July 12th, 6:00 PM. 256 Spring St, Jeffersonville, IN
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
"Dramatic video shows Coast Guard leaping onto submarine carrying 17,000 pounds of cocaine." Damn, that is one strong Coast Guard
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC New York)
 
 
 
Never one to miss out on a trend, R Kelly arrested for sex trafficking
source: nbcnewyork.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Philadelphia)
 
 
 
A new contender emerges. Straight out of PA, ladies and gentlemen meet: Deportation Daphne
source: nbcphiladelphia.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNBC)
 
 
 
Google takes a step forward in the creation of a gossipy assistant by leaking your supposedly private conversations to the press
source: cnbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
New Orleans has weathered hurricanes before, so why is everyone so worried about this one? Well usually this time of year the Mississippi is at 8 feet... right now it's at 16
source: www-m.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Dozens hurt, some seriously, on Air Canada flight to Austrailia when turbulence sends them crashing into the ceiling. If only there were some device that would allow them to remain safely fastened into their seats
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(OnFocus)
 
 
 
Food pantry receives 14,000 pounds of carrots. No word if an unusually short man with large ears and a Bronx accent has shown up to claim them, blaming a wrong turn at Albuquerque
source: onfocus.news   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Thu July 11, 2019
(TaxProf)
 
 
 
College student rented $150 textbook for $63; Amazon charged her father $3,800 when she was four days late returning it
source: taxprof.typepad.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
I'll have what she's having
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Register)
 
 
 
Who watches the Watchmen? The Watchmen, until they are watched
source: theregister.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ArtNet)
 
 
 
Egypt to sue auctioneer Christie's over sale of Tut sculpture, hopes curse kicks in soon
source: news.artnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Threat level raised to 'blimey' for UK ships in Iranian waters
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
OK. Which of you planted all the skunky dank bud on the Statehouse lawn? Or is de scent the "highest" form of protest after all?
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Man and woman arrested over the murder of Pat McCormick. Little Enos still devastated
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Pakistani politician duped into thinking video from a "Grand Theft Auto V" stunt was real
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Even the air in Australia is trying to kill you
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FB Photos)
 
 
 
Photoshop this early tweet
source: scontent-lht6-1.xx.fbcdn.net   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WTXL Tallahassee)
 
 
 
In most states, robbers settle for chump change cash. In Florida, robber goes for that sweet, sweet lottery score. Oh Yea
source: wtxl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Newspaper)
 
 
 
"Show me the evidence the camera used to decide I was speeding." "We erased it." "Not guilty"
source: thenewspaper.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
After years in legal limbo, Tupac's breakup letter to Madonna is up for auction
source: amp.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
This is probably the least alarming instance of a grown man with a closet full of costumes in a back alley
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
What's a good reason for a massive lawsuit? A: A DUI driver hits you. B: A defective product causes a serious injury, or C: Reese's lies about white peanut butter cups having white chocolate, even though the ingredients don't list white chocolate
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
Mussels might teach us how to clean up oil spills, or at least help with the heavy lifting
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
"Fark you, I'm a lawyer"
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mental Floss)
 
 
 
Ghost Town in the Sky-a 'Cursed' Theme Park in North Carolina-Has Hit the Market for $5.95 Million
source: mentalfloss.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Times of India)
 
 
 
Apparently in India being a drunk pilot gets you ousted from the cockpit and made regional director of the airline
source: bangaloremirror.indiatimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(I Heart Radio)
 
 
 
"Did you call the sheriffs?: Alexa: "No but I am now. Thanks for giving me a reason to call since you're beating your girlfriend. "
source: wilm.iheart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Et tu Brooklyn gunman?
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFPL Louisville)
 
 
 
Drew last seen jumping into the Ohio River
source: wfpl.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Engadget)
 
 
 
Twitter is down worldwide. Everybody panic
source: engadget.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
This is probably the best way to ensure you receive oral sex upon arriving home from work
source: foxnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Imgur)
 
 
 
Photoshop this bird
source: i.imgur.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Critics clamoring against Charlie Hebdo cartoon snatching attention from Women's World Cup (NSFW)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Turducken: Jurassic Park Edition (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Blogger.com)
 
 
 
Normally sunny days in Pacific Northwest are being haunted by unexpected appearance of JAWS: the July Abnormally Wet System. And JAWS2 opens this Sunday
source: cliffmass.blogspot.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSL Salt Lake City)
 
 
 
A tropic port and a three-hour tour they said. The skipper was brave and sure they said. The professor's PVC canoes would float they said. They had no business being on the river the sheriff said
source: ksl.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(People Magazine)
 
 
 
Cargo Ship Seized Carrying 20 Tons of Cocaine Owned by JPMorgan Chase, Philadelphia Fark party canceled
source: people.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Dude, you probably can't get dates because you live in a van, not because you're five feet tall (third to last paragraph)
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(New Zealand Herald)
 
 
 
"Stop liking what I don't like," TV critic edition
source: nzherald.co.nz   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Good News Network)
 
 
 
HeirBnB
source: goodnewsnetwork.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Some cops pull you over because of your speed, some plant it on you during a search of your vehicle and destroy your life
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bothell-Kenmore Reporter)
 
 
 
"Censorship ends in violence," according to some, which is an interesting argument when posting uncensored fliers threatening violence
source: bothell-reporter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(mightyearth.org)
 
 
 
They're destroying the Brazilian rain forest, exploiting child labor, poisoning and stealing land from indigenous peoples, committing financial fraud, and are one of the top 10 polluters in the United States. Meet Cargill, the Worst Company in the World
source: mightyearth.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Midwest Twitter: "Update: Here's a better view of the pig intestines"
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
The ten stages of genocide, according to scholars who studied Srebrenica in Bosnia. At least we here in the US would never . . . oh, crap, we're on number eight
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(My Wabash Valley)
 
 
 
Buffalo Wild Wings debuts new "Hepatitis A" flavor; still promises to charge $20 for 5 wings
source: mywabashvalley.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KSTU FOX 13)
 
 
 
Train derails, spewing dozens of Jeeps all over the Nevada desert. #justjeepthings
source: fox13now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(5 News Fayetteville)
 
 
 
Pizza Hut's plastic roof is tougher than you think
source: 5newsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun (Ireland))
 
 
 
Zeus gets angry with tourists on some northern Greek islands, kills six and injured hundreds
source: thesun.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KJCT 8 Grand Junction)
 
 
 
Canadian finds way to successfully protect beer in case of an accident
source: kjct8.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KFOR Oklahoma City)
 
 
 
Two arrested driving stolen car with a rattlesnake, radioactive uranium, and an open bottle of Kentucky Deluxe. Wait, what?
source: kfor.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(History Channel)
 
 
 
On this day in history, in 1861, Union forces under the command of General McClellan won the battle of Rich Mountain, securing the region of West Virginia and ensuring a bright future for banjo players for centuries to come
source: history.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 40 Sacramento)
 
 
 
'Modesto police arrested a suspect in the murder of an adult book store clerk after a full-blown manhunt.' Phrasing people
source: fox40.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
Jeffrey Epstein is in the same jail as Mexican drug lord "El Chapo," and could get 10-15 years for his crimes. Ironically, as 10-15 years is what he was always requesting
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 43 Pennsylvania)
 
 
 
Pagan motorcycle gang members threaten to harm a man and his family, maybe with their wild beards
source: fox43.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
It's so hot in South Florida that some women are walking around in just their bras, and the click explosions begin
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGAL 8)
 
 
 
KFC blown to pieces, thousands and thousands of succulent pieces
source: wgal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lifewire)
 
 
 
Fark selected fourth best news aggregator. Welcome to fourth best Fark!
source: lifewire.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Deadspin)
 
 
 
Here's what every member of the USMNT has to say about U.S. Soccer's wage inequality. Tl;dr: "Crickets"
source: deadspin.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Chicago Tribune Images)
 
 
 
Photoshop this equine water breather
source: trbimg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(9News (Australia))
 
 
 
Mullet Man (yes Mullet Man) wanted for 'swiping sex toys and lollies' from store on Australia's gold coast. Police say the distinctive looking Mullet Man is also responsible for a string of other robberies and burglaries on the coast since mid-June
source: 9news.com.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
What's the solution to the affordable housing crisis? Robots
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(FOX6Now)
 
 
 
75-year-old Florida man fights off alligator that tried to eat his daughter's golden retriever. This being Florida: 'Jody Ackerman said Osi was later taken to read the signs, warning of alligators in the water, to make sure he understands them.'
source: fox6now.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(SFGate)
 
 
 
It's not clear if Freddie Mack's clothes would give his dogs indigestion, but his Fannie Mae
source: sfgate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
No hay palabras, Trump
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
I own this farking plot of land on shore. I own this farking little island just offshore. I can farking build my own farking bridge between them if I farking want to
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Judge: Because you contain a baby and have used drugs, I am sentencing you to remain in jail until after the baby comes out. Appeals Court: Try again, please, and this time don't say the quiet part out loud
source: mlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bangor Daily News)
 
 
 
Man believed relatives were mistreating great-grandmother so he put on his makeup and shot one of them
source: bangordailynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHSV Harrisonburg)
 
 
 
Wrong shirt, Thor
source: whsv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBS Dallas/Ft. Worth)
 
 
 
Your dog wants...you
source: dfw.cbslocal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Newspaper)
 
 
 
Insurance company: We're not paying because our insured was drunk when he crashed into you. Appeals court: That's not how any of this works
source: thenewspaper.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cosmopolitan)
 
 
 
Steamy vaginas? That sounds hot
source: cosmopolitan.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Farktography)
 
Farktography
 
Theme of Farktography Contest No. 740: "Bokeh 5". Details and rules in first post. LGT next week's theme
source: farktography.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Wed July 10, 2019
(News4Jax)
 
 
 
Could we all just STOP LICKING THINGS? Florida girl licks a tongue depressor in doctor's office and returns it to the jar
source: news4jax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Big Surprise: Residents of popular tourist destination annoyed by all the tourists
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Sun (Ireland))
 
 
 
Dad sheds 10 stone after giving up 20-pints-a-night weekend booze sessions. Difficulty: Irish
source: thesun.ie   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Trust.org)
 
 
 
Trump's Hurricane Katrina moment could be coming this weekend
source: news.trust.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WCAX Vermont)
 
 
 
Daddy-daughter day doesn't mean robbing people at knife point. Well, it shouldn't
source: wcax.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Progress)
 
 
 
As Nolan Bushnell, creator of Atari and Chuck E. Cheese's once said, "...now you can get from point A to point B while being hammered. What's wrong with that?"
source: dailyprogress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Quad City Times)
 
 
 
Man crashes truck into a ditch but emerged victorious from the vehicle, his can of beer held triumphantly in hand, surviving the accident
source: qctimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fark)
 
 
 
Fark NotNewsletter: What do bourbon and cast iron pans have in common?
source: fark.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Medium)
 
 
 
Sixty percent of Republicans agree with this statement: "These are not our children, and they should not have come or been brought here. The government is doing all that it needs to be doing"
source: medium.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kotaku)
 
 
 
Hey baby, let's rent a room. We can play TSA agent and passenger, then try my 787 on your landing strip
source: kotaku.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Photoshop this stroller
source: media1.s-nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(People Magazine)
 
 
 
Nobody clapped or cheered when Jack Higgins accepted his high school diploma. And that was just fine with him. Damn all this dust anyway
source: people.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
♪ One ride in Bangkok makes a cabbie hostile, the motorbike mafia might break your knees ♪
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Medical Xpress)
 
 
 
Addicted to video games? This treatment might help. But then again, it's German, so it's probably going to hurt
source: medicalxpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(News 13 Orlando)
 
 
 
Disney's Animal Kingdom's attempt at capturing a real, live construction worker with a pit trap foiled by emergency crews
source: mynews13.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Because of its ridiculous abortion ban, Alabama is soon going to see a Pussy Riot
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Vice)
 
 
 
Canadian drivers are causing accidents because they're being too nice, creating dangerous situations on the road
source: vice.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
UN rapporteur urges US action on Khashoggi report, hopefully through some sick beats and rhymes
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WSBTV)
 
 
 
Door to armored car inexplicably pops open and cash blows all over interstate highway. I'm sure something like this has never happened before
source: wsbtv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Al Jazeera)
 
 
 
French-owned Javelins found on Libyan base were meant for 'self-protection' of counter-terrorism unit. No word on why they decided to go with something with only a 30/120 range and 1d6 piercing damage for self-defense though
source: aljazeera.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TampaBay.com (St. Petersburg Tim)
 
 
 
The movie 'Crawl,' which will be released Friday and features fake killer alligators, had footage shot on a lake where a real body was just found surrounded by real alligators
source: tampabay.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Some Gal)
 
 
 
Photoshop this odd dancer
source: ellenoliverdance.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Trend-reversing decline in recreational marijuana use among high-school students in several states is attributed to: A) DARE programs, B) random police searches of school lockers, C) legalization of recreational marijuana
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(BBC-US)
 
 
 
"Meeting the Queen when you've got Tourettes." This is not a euphemism
source: bbc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Under a new law, drug dealers will face responsibility if a person dies while using their product. Whether or not this will also apply to the pharmaceutical or firearm industries is unknown
source: cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Lex 18)
 
 
 
Fark ready headline: Man in underwear arrested at animal shelter after fighting invisible nemesis
source: lex18.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KWQC Quad Cities)
 
 
 
Woman arrested for taking carpooling with children too literally
source: kwqc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NPR)
 
 
 
City deploys thought control devices to cause children to flee from parks
source: npr.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
When this is over, Bill Cosby is going to look like a celibate monk by comparison
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Smoking Gun)
 
 
 
Cops: Inmate mailed postcard to second inmate soliciting murder of third inmate. Bonus: All three men are locked up in the same county jail
source: thesmokinggun.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Orlando Sentinel)
 
 
 
Gallant writes down the plate number of a car involved in a hit and run and reports it to law enforcement. Then there is Florida Man
source: orlandosentinel.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TC Palm)
 
 
 
Man says his car is covered in grease. Detailing shop say he's full of crap. Cops agree. Reporter opens his thesaurus
source: tcpalm.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Pyramid on Greek island represents the beginning of our civilisation and why are we only just hearing about this now? (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Abc.net.au)
 
 
 
Man attacks woman walking her dogs, ends up terrierfied and in deep shih tzu. Bonus: shih tzu's name is Ru Paul
source: abc.net.au   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(C|Net)
 
 
 
Scientists find ocean worms make a racket when they rumble. Worm trifecta achieved
source: cnet.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
American Airlines apologizes to woman told to leave airplane because her outfit was too revealing of her assets. Did we mention she was black? And that she is a doctor? [NSFW if your workplace is in the 1920s]
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LiveLeak)
 
 
 
Monkey see, monkey do, or, how to catch a lot of monkeys
source: liveleak.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Click Orlando)
 
 
 
♪ Bay-Bee Shaaar ♪ *gulp*
source: clickorlando.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
SeaWorld guests outraged after SeaWorld lives up to its name
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
US fighter jets being fitted with special new radar to pinpoint unexplained flying objects that are probably not alien craft
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Caption these two UFC female fighters
source: cdn.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ieee spectrum)
 
 
 
Researchers are torturing robots by forcing them to repeatedly grasp objects that are impossible for them to grasp, and everyone collectively screams NOOO
source: spectrum.ieee.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Scottish Sun)
 
 
 
Gremlin takes apart jet engine at 10,000 feet, terrifies passengers by throwing spinner into the engine fan
source: thescottishsun.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Cleveland Plain Dealer)
 
 
 
Vying for a tag for his country, Canada man survives going over Niagara Falls without even a barrel
source: cleveland.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Hot dog buns recalled over fears they may contain more than pig noses and rectums
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Radio.com)
 
 
 
While everyone was distracted by Trump, earthquakes, and the World Cup, Wisconsin quietly annexed part of Michigan
source: wwjnewsradio.radio.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Gothamist)
 
 
 
Citizens are complaining about poison ivy growing on government property. If your response to this was to put up a sign indicating the presence of poison ivy, you may be suitable for an administrative job at the MTA
source: gothamist.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Ars Technica)
 
 
 
"The Apollo Guidance Computer isn't a very good bitcoin miner"
source: arstechnica.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHNT Huntsville)
 
 
 
Pets on Patios: are they allowed in Alabama?
source: whnt.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(wtnh.com)
 
 
 
Forget road rage, it's summertime - Someone horn in on your fishing spot? Drive past you too fast on a jet-ski? Just pull a gun and threaten them in today's episode of Boat Rage
source: wtnh.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 31 Denver)
 
 
 
Corrections officer accused of smuggling burrito filled with drugs into Buena Vista prison has clearly read subby's script for a 'That 70s Show' reunion
source: kdvr.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WGNO)
 
 
 
Dammit Barry: Louisiana edition
source: wgno.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Reuters)
 
 
 
Putin implores the world to think about the plight of the worms
source: reuters.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Just some live 41,000-year-old worms emerging from the Siberian permafrost. NBD (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Real Simple)
 
 
 
Photoshop these fruit flies
source: cdn-image.realsimple.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(People Magazine)
 
 
 
This month, instead of steak, your dog wants free ice cream for their Woofday Wetnose Wednesday treat. Stories about the food your dog loves most/least to the right
source: people.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Guardian)
 
 
 
Russian energy company warns Instagrammers not to swim in its lake because it's actually an ash dump filled with harmful metal oxides that are really not good for the skin
source: theguardian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CBC)
 
 
 
At the Super 8 in Winnipeg, we'll leave the carbon monoxide on for ya
source: cbc.ca   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Another day, another story about migrant kids being abused at border concentra...oops, sorry, I mean happy fun-time summer camps
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Telegraph_US)
 
 
 
White teens tag their school with swastikas as a "senior prank" while wearing masks to hide their identities, are all caught because their phones auto-connected to school WiFi using their individual logins
source: thetelegraph.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
Plans, schmans - just build the rest areas. We'll figure out later whether they needed things like sewer systems
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Kare11)
 
 
 
American gored during running of the bulls was trying to get a selfie. Well, he got the point
source: kare11.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
The powers that be have made cars the de facto form of transportation in North America because cars and everything that go with them is big business, and money makes the world go round. Also, gasoline is flammable. Your money burns
source: theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
The "ban plastic straws" movement has blood on its hands
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Comic Book)
 
 
 
Killjoy parents use their children as props to petition for removal of toys from Happy Meal
source: comicbook.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Block Club Chicago)
 
 
 
Old and Busted: Alligators in the NYC sewers. New Hotness: Crocodile in Chicago's Humboldt Park Lagoon
source: blockclubchicago.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Missoulian)
 
 
 
Hunter succeeds
source: missoulian.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Tue July 09, 2019
(Fox 4 KC)
 
 
 
Beans beans the musical fruit, the more you eat, the more you toot. The more you toot, the more quickly the police find you
source: fox4kc.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NJ.com)
 
 
 
NJ man killed in hit and run. Article appropriately focuses on his biatching 89 trans am
source: nj.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WLOX Biloxi)
 
 
 
Driving west on I-10 in Jackson County, Mississippi this afternoon? You're screwed
source: wlox.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
Facebook did fight fake news... when it was about Facebook
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
Trailer for the next Jurassic World movie
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(StudyFinds)
 
 
 
Big win for Scientology
source: studyfinds.org   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
👩⚖'s 🤷 😀
source: amp.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(ABC News)
 
 
 
Secret Service outlines warning signs for mass attacks based on U.S. incidents in 2018. Finds letting people with severe mental health issues roam freely around the country without any proper support whatsoever might not be such a good idea
source: abcnews.go.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(City Pages)
 
 
 
Man's cabin lands on him. Brother shows up demanding his ruby sneakers
source: citypages.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
Washingtonn State AG suing US Navy of expansion of Growler activities. To be fair, a good growler can keep up the whole neighborhood
source: kiro7.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Newsweek)
 
 
 
World's biggest volcano stripped of title after scientists expose it as massive fake
source: newsweek.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Photoshop these pastel people
source: img.thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
Having solved their problems of fake news, online bullying and election pandering, Zuck turns his attention to the next huge problem: nipples
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
Jack'd taken by the Scruff
source: thedailybeast.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(I Heart Radio)
 
 
 
Rest of the country: Let's be naughty and record ourselves licking ice cream in store freezers Florida: Hold my beer
source: realtalk910.iheart.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(5 News Fayetteville)
 
 
 
Skater slain at skateboard park gets one last ride down a ramp in his coffin thanks to family and friends
source: 5newsonline.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Entertainment Weekly)
 
 
 
George RR Martin adds the Lannisters to the list of things the 'Game of Thrones' prequel won't have. But if you've always wanted to know about the Casterlys and to memorize the names of 93 more kingdoms, you're in luck
source: ew.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WFTV Orlando)
 
 
 
Florida Man arrested with drugs, baby gator, grave misunderstandings about to shoot up Krokodil
source: wftv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Man: "hey Google, why didn't you make a doodle for Juneteenth? Here's one. Google: Hey, your art is really cool. Want a job? Here's one
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NYPost)
 
 
 
New trend for young women: drunk hot yoga (w/pics)
source: nypost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
It was bad enough this teenager stole the Rolex and jewels, but then police connected him to the lemur
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Scientists now say there's an 11% chance of another large earthquake in Southern California next week. Which is good because most other weeks it's usually about 40%
source: latimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Onion)
 
 
 
Frustrated Subway marketers scrap $150 million Jeffrey Epstein ad campaign
source: theonion.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Photoshop this card-carrying Latin American Elvis
source: washingtonpost.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Mercury News)
 
 
 
Just a reminder that nuclear waste is currently being stored along a stretch of pristine southern California coastline that is vulnerable to both tsunamis and earthquakes. And the people doing it are pointing to Fukushima as a success story
source: mercurynews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(USA Today)
 
 
 
Remember that girl who demanded her depressed boyfriend kill himself in series of text messages? Well there's a documentary about her now, becaue of course their is, and it turns out her texts were mostly lines of dialogue from "Glee"
source: usatoday.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Loop North News)
 
 
 
Dating site says Chicago's North Side has the most 'sugar daddies' nationwide
source: loopnorth.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Bloomberg)
 
 
 
When Jeffrey Epstein wasn't busy diddling several young girls per day, he was famous for making his billions by, uh, um, er, you know, in 1981, homina homina, and then TA DA The Aristocrats
source: bloomberg.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox 13 Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
Wang not excited about giant sargassum belt
source: fox13news.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Woman who fatally stabbed her husband in the back with a 14-inch decorative dagger during a Kung Fu sex game is sentenced to 15 years
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Oregon Live)
 
 
 
Florida Man breaks into your house to shower and eat your food. Oregon Man breaks into your house to smoke your weed, cut holes in your wall, wear your wife's onesie, and dress up his cat
source: oregonlive.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
The Hastily Made Cleveland tourism video has been updated to reflect some changes since the last one was hastily made. Cleveland: Still Not Detroit
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(CNN)
 
 
 
In Australia, even the gender reveal parties will try and kill you
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(European Space Agency)
 
 
 
Greenland lost an average of 255 Gigatons of ice from 2003 to 2016. Put into more relatable terms, that's like your creepy uncle losing his entire porn collection every single year
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(Yahoo)
 
 
 
Where are the four women who acted as recruiting pimps for Jeffrey Epstein's pedophile rape ring?
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(Bucks Local News)
 
 
 
NJ discovers that they still had a toll free exit from the state so they fix the problem
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(Slate)
 
 
 
What a load of Malarkey
source: slate.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Fox News)
 
 
 
Residents of an English suburb concerned by the growth of a mysterious car graveyard in their neighborhood. Look, people, if any of those things starts wearing a green goblin mask, you might want to get out of town. I'm just saying
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(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Over two hundred thousand people are interested in being shot by irate military guards at Area 51
source: discussglobal.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LiveLeak)
 
 
 
Watch this video carefully, see if you think this woman may be attempting some sort of insurance scam
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(Oklahoman)
 
 
 
Cultural desert Oklahoma is rebranding, plans to redesign license plates and to update official slogan from uninspiring "Better Than OK" to evidently unironic "Welcome to Oklahoma"
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(Imgur)
 
 
 
Caption (or label) this family portrait
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(Twitter)
 
 
 
Bill Barr refuses to recuse himself from the Jeffrey Epstien case. Because of course he won't
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Independent)
 
 
 
Oh, nothing. Just an Antarctic glacier the size of Florida on the brink of collapse that could raise sea levels by half a metre
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MSN)
 
 
 
Ross Perot definitely not running for president
source: msn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(KFOR Oklahoma City)
 
 
 
Suspect in brutal beating caught on camera hitting himself in the face while in police custody
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(Metro)
 
 
 
Meet the most dangerous object in Chernobyl: The abandoned digger claw
source: metro.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Will no-one think of the billionaires? (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Scotsman invents new delicacy. Cardiologists worldwide order new BMWs (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(History Channel)
 
 
 
On this day in history, in 1941, British cryptologists broke the German Enigma key for ground-to-air operations on the Eastern Front, leading many military analysts to ponder the significance of the message "DRINK YOUR OVALTINE"
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(Slate)
 
 
 
This article about dealing with squatters in space isn't, sadly, about how to handle people taking illicit dumps on alien worlds. But hopefully that one's being written next
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(New York Daily News)
 
 
 
Billionaire creates his own NYC parking spot with novel fake-curb-cut technique, a ruse which would've worked except it didn't fall apart in six months like typical NYC infrastructure
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(The Sun)
 
 
 
"I've spent £116k becoming a real-life Barbie with 34J boobs but strangers call me a monster." How bad could it be? Let's scroll down and OH, DEAR GOD... THOSE SUNGLASSES! (possible nsfw content on page)
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(WJAC TV Johnstown)
 
 
 
God smites church
source: wjactv.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Epstein may be getting off again, this time without the help of 15-year-old girls. Acosta's plea deal is the gift that keeps on giving
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(Daily Star)
 
 
 
Could I BE wearing any more clothes? (possible nsfw content on page)
source: dailystar.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Wordpress)
 
 
 
Photoshop this high altitude fellowship
source: twistedsifter.files.wordpress.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(WHO TV Des Moines)
 
 
 
Sheriff's office learns expensive lesson that you can't arrest someone for criticizing your deputy on Facebook
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(WGAL 8)
 
 
 
Drug-addled mom sends 17-month-old daughter to survival camp, which is to say left in the woods at night near a retention pond
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(Yahoo)
 
 
 
I can see your crack from space. Giggity
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(My Fox 8 Greensboro)
 
 
 
Woman throws snake at another woman, steals her car and leads cops on chase before crashing. The Arisssssstocratsssss
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(The New York Times)
 
 
 
City pays ransom to hackers to get its files back. Gets its email service and phone service back, no files. Bold plan, Cotton
source: nytimes.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Above the Law)
 
 
 
There is little doubt that this time Jeffrey Epstein is going down hard. The more interesting question is which of the dirtbag lawyers involved in his original travesty of a "plea", including Acosta, Dershowitz and Ken Starr are going down with him
source: abovethelaw.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(CNN)
 
 
 
Hero tag has never been more deserved... and I couldn't figure out any jokes about hot dogs
source: www-m.cnn.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(STLToday)
 
 
 
It's got art, it's got culture, it's got a girlfriend shooting her boyfriend in the neck and it's got a boyfriend shooting his girlfriend in the face. And it has hospitals near the Art Museum
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(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Older females brought in to arouse the younger males and teach them how to have sex. Nature works in mysterious ways
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Twitter)
 
 
 
If you picked 48 hours until Fox News started whatabouting the Epstein charges, step up and claim your prize
source: twitter.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC News)
 
 
 
As it turns out, the Palm Beach County School District does think its employees can say that the Holocaust was a factual, historical event
source: nbcnews.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Nom Nom Nom
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(NBC Washington)
 
 
 
Washington DC is all wet, and it rained a lot too
source: nbcwashington.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
Mon July 08, 2019
(Some Guy)
 
 
 
Go to a shopping mall and fake a kidnapping for your YouTube channel and chased down by police? You have influenced yourself into a weekend in the pokey
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(NJ.com)
 
 
 
Here's an example of how the word 'pig' can be legitimately used in a story involving police. Surprisingly, did not take place in Florida
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(Fox 13 Tampa Bay)
 
 
 
He does look like the kind of Florida man who gets his rectum checked for heroin
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(Marketwatch)
 
 
 
Couple discovers that living in a van down by the river is not a glamorous as it seems
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(KIRO-7 Seattle)
 
 
 
If your friends jumped off a cliff would you do it too? In the age of viral videos the answer is always yes. Was a cliff involved? No, it's just ice cream
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(WCJB Gainesville)
 
 
 
Man who is out on bail for trying to kill his father, tries to kill his father. If at first you don't succeed
source: wcjb.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Panama City News Herald)
 
 
 
If you purchased a barn kit, I have a bit of bad news for you. Note to self: Stick with IKEA
source: newsherald.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this happy tourist
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Daily Mail)
 
 
 
Protip: Before accepting a wedding invitation, find out if there will be an expensive admission charge
source: dailymail.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(TuneIn)
 
 
 
Tonight - Paul's Memory Bank's first all OTR show, featuring debut episodes of My Favorite Husband, The Stan Freberg Radio Show and Superman. Show starting at around 8PM ET
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(Scientific American)
 
 
 
This isn't what is meant when environmentalists insist on carbon scrubbers
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(ABC7 Los Angeles)
 
 
 
Violent melee erupts in Toontown. Roger Rabbit immediately claims he was framed
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(Washington Post)
 
 
 
Four-star Admiral set to take over the Navy next month decides to retire instead to spend more time with his sexual harassment victims
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(WHNT Huntsville)
 
 
 
Tip for aspiring reporters: When you post a story about a man who died when a vehicle fell on his home, it behooves you to add more detail than "Man dies when vehicle falls on his home"
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(The Drive)
 
 
 
Remember that Norwegian tanker that was attacked "by Iran" near the Strait of Hormuz? It's patched up and underway to deliver its cargo... to Iran
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(AP News)
 
 
 
AP-NORC Poll: Americans rarely seek guidance from clergy. Forgiveness is faster and easier
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(The Daily Beast)
 
 
 
How many times do we have to tell you to stay away from the brown acid?
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(Fox 4 Now Fort Myers)
 
 
 
Surveillance cameras capture rarely-seen arrival of Florida Man to his natural environment
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(The Atlantic)
 
 
 
Photoshop this model
source: cdn.theatlantic.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(Politico)
 
 
 
Apparently, they aren't quite as self-evident as originally hoped
source: politico.com   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(LA Times)
 
 
 
Obamacare "is" or "is not" working. Please choose only one
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(BBC-US)
 
 
 
Freeclimber scales London's The Shard skyscraper without ropes, suction cups, or becoming The Splat
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(NYPost)
 
 
 
Boat's on fire, yo
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(Fox News)
 
 
 
Here's a tip if you're going to dangle a toddler over a high ledge: Don't
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(NPR)
 
 
 
I. Am. No longer. Groot (Image in article might give some people the heebie jeebies)
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(Independent)
 
 
 
HBO's next special IRL: The 14 sailors who died during a fire last week on a nuclear-powered Russian military submarine prevented a "planetary catastrophe"
source: independent.co.uk   |   share: Share on Facebook Share on Twitter
 
(MLive.com)
 
 
 
Michigan company creates a pill to bring you back down when you've had too many Becky and you're freaking out, man
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